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Peter was walking around on the ceiling of the Avengers compound, his arms crossed and practically moping.
His phone was vibrating, but he was very pointedly ignoring it, not wanting to continue arguing with MJ.
“What the hell are you doing up there, man?” Sam’s voice asked.
Peter looked down at him. “I’m walking around,” he said, instantly getting even more defensive, thanks to how on-edge he had been all day.
Sam raised his eyebrows at him. “Um. Something the matter?”
Steve and Bucky came in, both of their eyes raising to look at the teenager hanging upside down, completely upright, on the ceiling.
“No,” Peter replied instantly. His phone vibrated again, and Peter saw that MJ was calling him now. Growling in anger, he took it out, crouched on the ceiling, and webbed the phone up before dropping to the ground, doing a backflip and landing on his feet.
“What’s the problem?” Steve asked, not even bothering to ask whether or not something was wrong, just knowing instantly that there was.
Peter didn’t respond, just going past them and into the living room. He flopped down on the couch, leaning his head back and shutting his eyes.
He heard the others come in, standing around him.
“What is it?” Steve asked again, his voice gentle but assertive.
“Me and MJ got in an argument,” Peter finally snapped, opening his eyes but keeping them away from the adults. He was ready for them to be derisive towards him, for them to chastise him for being immature and getting upset about something like that.
“Your girlfriend? What about?” Sam asked. Steve sat down beside Peter and Bucky and Sam took to the two lounge chairs on either side of the couch.
“She doesn’t know I’m Spider-Man, but my boyfriend does, and I don’t want to tell her yet, and she’s mad that me and Ned are ‘acting shady,’” --he used air-quotes for emphasis— “and I’m trying to tell her that it’s not anything she needs to worry about, but she won’t listen .”
The three adults shared a look as Peter glowered at the carpet.
“It seems like she just doesn’t want there to be secrets in your relationship,” Steve said cooly. “Which is understandable and important. There shouldn’t be secrets, at least not things like this. She probably feels excluded, and like you trust Ned more than her. Which is fair for her to feel.”
Peter sighed. “I don’t want to tell her yet. I don’t even know what I would say.”
“Well, why don’t you want to tell her?” Sam asked, leaning back with his hands folded behind his head.
“I’m worried that if she gets involved, something bad will happen to her. The more people who know about my identity, the more likely I am to be found out. And if I’m found out, the bad guys could go after them, or Aunt May.”
“We can’t really empathize with you, Pete, since none of us ever really had the benefit of secret identities, but I can understand why you might be afraid. Afraid you wouldn’t be able to protect the people you care about,” Steve said, looking pointedly at him.
“And I’m afraid that she’ll get worried about me when I go and do things, when she sees me doing something dangerous. I don’t want to put her through that,” Peter said, feeling his voice get thick.
“That’s a valid fear to have,” Bucky said, the first words he had spoken. “But, either you have to deflect it and tell her a lie, or tell her the truth. If you really care about her, she deserves the truth. But maybe you should give her the choice between being worried about you, or being blissfully ignorant.”
Peter looked down, considering that. “I do want to tell her,” he said quietly, trailing off slightly.
“Maybe talk to your boyfriend --Ned— about it. You can come up with exactly what to say together,” Sam said.
Peter nodded slightly. “Yeah, that sounds like a good idea,” he said quietly.
Steve stood up, ruffling Peter’s hair lightly. Peter ducked away from his hand slightly, feeling weird about having this guy’s hands in his hair when he barely felt like he knew him.
“Here, how about I make everyone some grilled cheese,” he said, going towards the kitchen.
The others stood up and followed and, slowly, Peter joined them.
Tony wasn’t at the compound that weekend. He had an important conference in Sweden that he had to show up to, and so Peter had been left basically by himself, since he wasn’t as close to the other Avengers as he was with Tony.
But Peter had to admit, it was kind of nice to be able to talk to Sam, Steve, and Bucky. They understood him, since they were in a polyamorous relationship like he was. Peter hadn’t ever met another triad, and it was good to see how they functioned and ask for advice. Peter and Sam bonded over being trans, but he wasn’t as comfortable around him and the others as he was around Tony.
Peter sat at the bar looking into the kitchen as Steve started getting things out for his grilled cheese, and Bucky helped him.
Sam just leaned against the wall, watching them, before focusing on Peter.
“How’s the testosterone?” Sam asked, raising his eyebrows slightly.
Peter looked up, shrugging. “It’s been good. The bite gave me a bunch of it, which was kind of hard to explain to my doctor, but I mean, I’m definitely not complaining.”
“Good,” he said approvingly. “I’m glad to hear your transition’s going well. I wish I had access to the things you do when I was your age.”
“Yeah, I’m really lucky,” Peter agreed, looking down at the counter. He thought for a moment, and then looked up at Sam. He was the only trans adult he knew very well, so he supposed he was kind of a role model for him. “Do you still get dysphoria?” he asked. He knew that Sam had been out for years, had legally changed his name, had pretty much completed his transition, and had even gotten surgery. Peter was curious to know if there was ever a possibility that he would be dysphoria-free. Because even with everything that had happened, with how advanced in his own transition he was, sometimes he got dysphoria so bad it felt like he was allergic to his own skin. It would comfort him to know that there was a light at the end of this tunnel.
“Eh, sometimes,” Sam said, shrugging. “But it’s kind of distant now. Like the person I was pre-transition is from a different life. They’re still there, but it was so long ago that sometimes I forget that the girl in all my childhood photos is me . And I think the memory of occupying a body that didn’t comply with who I knew I was reminds me of the dysphoria I felt.”
Peter nodded a little bit. “Any tips for helping relieve it?” he asked, looking up at him.
“Working out is nice,” he said. “Sometimes I like to go to group therapy sessions and volunteer, but you’re a little too young for that, I think. Um.. Wrapping up in a blanket and watching a movie is a good distractor.”
Peter nodded a little bit. “Thanks,” he said, watching Steve as he made grilled cheese.
“Any tips for a good polyamorous relationship?” he asked, more as a general question, rather than one directed at Sam.
“Communication,” Steve said, not looking up from his work. “Even more important in a triad than in a mono relationship.”
“Right,” Peter said, feeling a bit of guilt stab at his stomach.
“Also, make sure everyone is getting all the affection they want. Don’t leave someone out,” Bucky said, shooting a halfhearted glare at Sam. It was obvious he was being facetious, since the two of them were fond of each other and just enjoyed teasing one another.
Peter chuckled a little bit and nodded.
“And don’t forget to make time for yourself,” Sam added, returning the look to Bucky. “Having two partners is twice the fun, but sometimes it can get a little exhausting.”
“Okay,” Peter said, smiling. “Thanks you guys. I can’t ask Tony questions like this, you know? And I’m always worried something will happen and it’ll ruin our friendships because we did something in our romantic relationship.”
“Don’t worry yourself too much,” Sam said dismissively. “If you’re patient and aren’t afraid to talk to one another and figure it out as you go along, it’ll be fine.”
Peter nodded, and Steve turned around, two plates full of grilled cheese as Bucky was pouring soup into some bowls.
Despite the fact that Peter didn’t know Sam, Steve, and Bucky as well as he knew Tony, he was glad that he had had this opportunity to talk to them, and he was glad that they had insisted on talking to him while he was upset.
After they had eaten, Peter retrieved his phone and called MJ, and after finding out that she was willing to shoulder a bit of worry for his sake, he told her the truth.