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Jade Orchid: Seven Tests
(I do not, nor will I EVER, own One Piece. This heartwarming series belongs to Ze Great Eiichiro Oda.)
Nami had been feeling very funny for the past few days.
For one thing, she had trouble buttoning her pants.
"Ugggh...come on," she groaned, "freakin' button up already...!"
She sucked in her stomach and buttoned up her pants.
"Finally." Nami sighed. "I thought I'd never get these on--"
*POP!* The button popped off.
"DAMMIT!!!" Nami cursed.
"Nami, what's wrong?" Robin asked.
"I can't button my pants for some reason." Nami answered. "And I just bought these!"
"Perhaps you've gained some weight?" Robin surmised.
"What?!" Nami questioned. "That's ridiculous!"
"Then why do you think your pants don't fit you?" Robin asked.
Nami chewed her lip, a bit worriedly.
"I'm not sure," she answered, "Unless..."
She went to the bathroom and got on the scale. Nami gasped in surprise when she saw where the arrow landed, and she screamed.
"HOW IN THE HELL DID I GAIN SEVEN POUNDS?!"
Her scream alerted everyone.
"AAH!!" Aika yelped as she hid under the table.
"Mommy!" Kumi screamed, also hiding under the table.
"Hey, wait for me!" Hanako, Robin and Zoro's five-year old son, cried as he got under the table with Aika and Kumi.
"Now what?" Zoro asked, irritably.
"Nami?" Luffy called. "Everything okay?"
"I'm getting fat!" Nami sobbed. "Oh, this is terrible!"
"Aww, Nami," Luffy spoke, sympathetically, "you're not getting fat."
"Oh, really?!" Nami questioned. "Then explain how I've gained SEVEN POUNDS!!!"
"You could be gaining some muscle," Luffy answered, bluntly, "I mean, you do workout a lot."
"...Luffy?" Nami asked. "Do you want me to tear you apart?"
"What?!" Luffy asked. "I mean that as a compliment!!"
"Nami," Robin spoke up, "I was thinking...maybe you might be..."
"I might be what?" Nami asked.
Robin approached her and whispered something in her, causing her to gasp silently.
"...Oh, god...!" she whispered. "Umm...I'll be right back. I gotta go to the store."
"Okay." Luffy replied. "See you when you get back."
***Short timeskip brought to you by Atra's cooking (A Mobile Suit Gundam: Iron-Blooded Orphans reference)***
At a convenience store not far from the Jade Orchid, Nami walked through the aisles, looking around tentatively.
"They should be around here, somewhere," she spoke to herself, "Where are they?"
That's when she spotted them. Home Pregnancy Tests.
Nami sighed before she picked up a box...in fact, she picked up seven.
"Can't hurt to be 100% sure." she added. "And if it is...well, it means Luffy and I are gonna be parents."
***Short timeskip brought to you by Yoko Kurama (A Yu Yu Hakusho reference)***
Nami entered the Jade Orchid and hurried up the stairs, but not without Luffy noticing her.
"Oh, hey, Nami!" Luffy called. "What's that you got there?"
"I'll tell you later!" Nami called. "Just...give me a minute, okay?!"
"Sure thing, babe." Luffy answered.
***Short timeskip brought to you by Kamina and Simon seeing Yoko's boobs (A Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann reference)***
Nami stood in the bathroom, holding her first pregnancy test. 'Okay, simple enough,' she noted, 'I just pee on it and wait a while, see what comes up.'
Nami did just that, and then, she waited.
A few minutes passed by and Nami checked the test. She gasped upon seeing a plus sign on it.
"Oh, my god...!" Nami whispered. 'But wait,' she thought, 'I still have six tests left. Maybe the first one's wrong!'
Nami took the second test and waited for the results. Same reaction. "Okay, let's try this a third time," Nami spoke. She took the third test and it came back with a plus sign, once again. "Still have four more tests left," Nami noted, "I'm sure most of them must be wrong." Nami took the fourth test and waited. Still the same result. "Fifth times the charm...?" she inquired, nervously as she took a fifth test. It still came back with the same result. "All right, sixth time," Nami prepared to take a sixth test. Still a plus sign. "...Seventh?" Nami asked as she took the seventh (and last) test. 'My last test...all of the others turned out positive...if this one is, too...that means...!' She took the test and waited.
After five whole minutes passed by, Nami checked the pregnancy test and gasped as tear droplets appeared in the corner of her eyes. She set the white stick down as she held her paws over her mouth and sat down on the toilet.
The result of the last Home Pregnancy Test...had a plus sign.
'Oh, my god...' Nami thought. 'I'm really pregnant...! I'm going to be a Mom...!'
*Knock! Knock!*
"Nami?" Luffy called. "Is everything okay, baby?"
"How long are you gonna be?!" Zoro questioned. "Other people live here!"
"Zoro!" Robin chastised.
"What?! I gotta use the bathroom!" Zoro replied.
"Aunt Nami?" Hanako called. "Are you all right?"
"Big Sis, please answer!" Aika called.
A pause...but then Nami stood up and opened the door, and Luffy gasped upon seeing the tears in her eyes.
"Nami?" he asked in concern. "What's wrong?"
All of a sudden, Nami ran up and hugged Luffy, who stumbled a bit in surprise.
"...You're gonna be a Dad...!" she whispered.
"Eh...?" Luffy asked. "Say what now?"
Nami sniffled as she brought Luffy into the bathroom and showed him the seven Home Pregnancy Tests. All of them with the plus sign.
"...You're pregnant?" Luffy asked, and Nami nodded. "I'm gonna be a Dad?"
"Yes...!" Nami answered.
Luffy was silent.
"Luffy?" Nami inquired. "Honey?"
At that moment, Luffy keeled over as he fainted.
"LUFFY!!" Nami cried as she dropped down and tried to shake him.
"Wait...I'm gonna be an aunt?!" Aika asked, excitedly. "YAHOO!!!"
"You're having a baby, Aunt Nami?" Hanako asked.
"Yes, Hanako, I am," Nami answered, still shaking Luffy.
"Congratulations, Nami." Robin smiled.
"Oh, boy," Zoro muttered. 'Just what I don't need,' he thought, 'another mouth to feed.'
"Luffy, please wake up!" Nami shook her husband. "Come on, wake up!"
"Unh..." Luffy groaned as he awoke. "Nami...?"
"Finally," Nami smiled, "Are you okay, Luffy?"
"I think so," Luffy answered, "are you really pregnant?"
"Yes," Nami nodded.
"...I see," Luffy said as he got up, "Pardon me for a second."
He walked into the bedroom, closed the door...and soon, he was heard cheering out loud.
"WHOOOOOOOOOOO!!! YES!!! OH, YES!!! WHOO-HOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I'M GONNA BE A DAD!!! YEAH, BABY!!!!"
"He's taking the news a lot better than I thought he would..." Nami mused.
In that moment, Aika ran up and hugged Nami.
"Congrats, Big Sis!" she spoke. "I'm so happy for you!"
"Thank you, Aika." Nami smiled.
"Are you done in there?" Zoro asked, pointing to the bathroom.
"Yes, Zoro." Nami answered. "Go ahead."
"Thanks," Zoro replied as he entered the bathroom and shut the door, "Hey, there's no toilet paper!"
"Check the cabinet!" Nami called.
"...Oh. Thanks!"
"You're welcome!"
"So what do we now?" Aika asked.
"First, we have to get the whole place ready for when the baby arrives," Nami answered, "We have to set up a nursery, baby proof the rooms, and get lots of supplies."
"What kind of supplies?" Hanako asked.
"Oh, baby food, toys, diapers," Nami listed, "those kind of things."
"Does this mean I have to share a room with the baby?" Hanako asked.
"You might not, Hanako," Robin answered.
"Oh." spoke Hanako. "Okay then."
As soon as he was done cheering, Luffy came out of the bedroom.
"Okay, I'm good," he piped up, "so, what's the plan?"
"Well, first," Nami began, "we've gotta get a nursery set up."
"Right," Luffy nodded, "Which room should we use?"
"There's a storage room we haven't used," Robin answered, "It's completely empty."
"It's perfect!" Aika piped up. "Let's use that!"
"Great!" Nami spoke. "Let's get started!"
"Let's get the paints!" Luffy exclaimed.
"And the furniture!" Aika added.
"And toys!" added Hanako.
"Of course," Robin chuckled, "We can't have the baby be bored, now can we?"
"Exactly," Nami concurred, "Though, we should wait until we found out if it's a boy or girl."
"Okay, Big Sis." Aika complied. "This is so exciting!"
"It really is," Nami concurred, "I can't wait to tell the others!"
"No need," Luffy told her, "I already called them."
"Wait, since when?" Nami asked.
"Since now," Luffy answered as he hung up the phone.
"Eh?!" Nami gasped.
"That was fast." Hanako noted.
"Wow!" Aika exclaimed.
"Luffy, this is something I wanted to tell everyone in person!" Nami chided.
"Sorry!" Luffy apologized. "I just got excited!"
"...Well, I guess it's not so bad," Nami replied, "I mean, it's not like you invited them over, too."
"...Uhhh..." Luffy muttered, eyes darting this way and that.
"...You invited them over." Nami deadpanned, and Luffy nodded.
*Knock! Knock!*
"Nami!"
"Aunt Kagome!" Aika exclaimed.
"Might as well let them in." Robin spoke.
"Guess so." Nami conceded as she stood up to let Kagome in.
"Luffy told me the great news!" Kagome beamed as she hugged Nami. "Ohh, I'm so happy for you!"
"Thanks, Kagome," Nami replied as she hugged Kagome back, "Although I wanted to tell you in person."
"Again, sorry." Luffy apologized. "Got excited."
"I know, baby." Nami nodded. "Honestly, I'd do the same thing."
"So, what're you guys planning on doing?" Kagome asked.
"Well, first off, we were gonna paint a nursery," Nami answered, "but we'll hold off on that until we learn the gender of the baby."
"Good idea," Kagome noted, "anything else?"
"We're gonna get toys," answered Hanako, "and baby food."
"That's good," Kagome smiled, "Best to be prepared."
"We're also gonna buy baby clothes!" Aika added. "But not now."
"I see," Kagome noted, "Well, it's good you're thinking ahead."
"Thanks." Aika responded. "It was really Big Sis's idea."
"Well, can I be of any help?" Kagome asked.
"Sure." Nami answered.
"Great!" Kagome replied.
Nami placed her paw over her belly.
"Can you hear me, little one?" she asked. "It's your Mom...I can't wait to meet you."
***Nami's womb brought to you by the Turbine's nursery (A Mobile Suit Gundam: Iron-Blooded Orphans reference)***
Inside Nami's womb, a tiny embryo stuck to the uterine wall.
'This voice...' it thought. 'It makes me feel so...safe.'
***Outside of Nami's womb brought to you by Eren vs. Annie, Round One (An Attack on Titan reference)***
"Hey~!" Luffy spoke to Nami's womb. "Hello in there! It's your Daddy!"
Nami laughed at this, as did Aika.
"Oh, Luffy." giggled Nami.
"Silly Big Brother," Aika smiled.
"Shouldn't we have a party?" Hanako asked.
"Oh, good idea!" Luffy agreed.
And a party, they had. They invited everyone.
"Congratulations, Nami!" spoke Shiemi. "We're so happy for you!"
"Thanks, Shiemi." Nami smiled. "So am I."
"Have you thought of what you're gonna do?" Rin asked.
"Yes, we have," Nami answered, "we'll set up a nursery, buy baby clothes, and get baby toys."
"Cool." Rin commented. "Be sure to get ones the baby won't choke on."
"We plan to." Luffy assured. "Don't worry about that."
"So, Hanako," Vivi began, "how do you feel about having another playmate running around?"
"I think it'll be cool!" Hanako answered. "Aside from Aika and Kumi, I'd love to have a little brother or sister around here!"
"Technically, the baby's not related to you," Zoro explained, "so, in a way, it's more like your adopted brother or sister."
"Oh." spoke Hanako. "Well, still, I'm excited!"
"We're excited, too." Robin added, petting her son.
"...So am I," Nami smiled, "I'm looking forward to becoming a Mom."
"And I'm looking forward to being a Dad," Luffy grinned.
"I just can't see you as a father," Sanji piped up, "but...I'm happy for you, nonetheless."
"Thanks, Sanji!" Luffy spoke. "I appreciate that!"
"Yeah." Sanji responded. "You're my friend, and I gotta support you."
"Aww." Luffy replied. "Thanks a lot, Sanji."
At any rate, the festivities had died down.
"Aww," Luffy pouted, "We were having fun."
"I know, Luffy." Nami hugged her man. "But we'll have even more fun once the baby arrives."
"Why can't we just do it while you're pregnant?" Luffy asked.
"...Well, there's that, too," Nami answered, "however, what I mean is having another party after our child is born."
"Oh, yeah," Luffy realized, blushing, "That's what you meant."
Nami giggled as she kissed Luffy on the lips.
"Mmmm..." Luffy moaned in her mouth as he returned her kiss.
Aika giggled while Hanako covered his eyes.
"Ew." he spoke. "It's bad enough Mom and Dad do that."
"You never know, son," Zoro retorted, "maybe someday, you'll be doing the same thing, too."
"I highly doubt it." Hanako countered.
"We'll see," Robin spoke with a wink.
"Still won't happen, Mom." Hanako told her. "Take my word for it."
"Whatever you say, Hanako." Robin smiled.
Aika giggled, patting Hanako on the head, with Nami and Luffy smiling at them.
Today was the start of one of the greatest moments of their lives.
'It's gonna be a long ride,' Nami thought, 'but hopefully, it'll all be worth it.'
