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Clarke ran her fingers over Lexa’s back under her shirt, the two of them were lying in bed, finally together after a long day apart. Lexa was busy all day; meetings with ambassadors, training with the Nightbloods…it was a long day. And Clarke had been spending more time with the healers, helping around, helping people, it just felt good to be saving lives instead of taking them and she was slowly getting better. Right now, she could feel the bumps of Lexa’s scars on her fingertips, something she had grown accustom to them by now, it didn’t cause her breath to hitch every time she saw them like the first few times, or make her want to pull her hand away because she was worried she would hurt Lexa. She’d never asked about them though, Clarke wants to, but she’s never been sure if Lexa would be okay with it.
“Can I ask you something?” Clarke asked, breaking the silence. Lexa only nodded, not so much as turning to look at her. “How did you get the scars on your back?”
Lexa smiled to herself, “There’s too many.” She replied, “Pick one.” She said instead, she doesn’t talk about them, any of them, not even the ones that have a good memory behind them.
Clarke nodded, trailing her fingers over the scars, stopping on one after a couple of seconds, “This one.” It was about two inches long, thin and jagged, but Clarke could feel like it was from something sharp that had cut into her skin very deep. “How did you get it?”
Lexa thought for a moment, she knew the story behind every single one of them, it was almost strange how she could remember. “I…” She started, sounding a little hesitant, almost embarrassed, “Walked into a dagger…”
“Wait…?” Clarke started, not knowing how to respond. “What?” She asked, “How did you do that?”
Lexa turned around to face Clarke, unsure of how to explain it, “We were training, and I was…walking back,” Unsure of how to say in English. “Stepping backwards, and didn’t notice the other goufa [child] behind me, who had a dagger.” She continued. “I stepped into it, I could feel the blade going past my clothes and into my skin.” It was just more embarrassing from there.
“Why is it so big then?” Clarke asked in response.
“I slipped.” Lexa muttered, her voice low and quiet, not wanting to say it. “It was a wet day, and my boot slipped in the mud…” She was speaking slowly, not looking at Clarke even. “So I fell, and the blade just cut into my back before it could be pulled away…”
“So…” Clarke started, “You walked backwards into a knife,” She recapped what Lexa had just said. “Slipped on mud, and fell on the ground as a blade cut into your back.” She nodded at Lexa, “I thought you were this really agile, badass warrior even when you were a kid in training.” Clarke smiled, “But no, you were just a clumsy little kid,” She doesn’t know why, but that was just a strange thought, every time Clarke thought about Lexa even as a child, she always saw a very stoic and serious little girl.
“I was not,” Lexa tried, “I was the most skilled warrior in my conclave,” She told Clarke, “Even as a young child,” She tried to argue, “This is not something that happened often, alright?”
“Sure,” Clarke nodded, “What were you like as a kid?” She asked mindlessly, wanting to know a bit more about that other than what she saw the Nightbloods when they were training. “Messy hair, clumsy on your feet, trying to be all serious but failing?”
“No,” Lexa almost rolled her eyes, “I was the same as I am now, this was just one accident.”
“That’s actually a really cute story,” Clarke told her after a moment, “You never talk about that side of you, the one that did stupid things and was just another kid.”
“There’s more to me than you know Clarke,” Lexa gave her a small smirk, “You don’t know, I might surprise you.”
“You do,” Clarke agreed, “Every time you smile, you surprise me.” That was only half a joke, after everything, after everything Lexa had done and seen and been through, it was surprising that she could still have something to smile about.
“It’s hard to not when I’m around you.”