Chapter Text
I'm sorry I let you down.
"Dude, that was fucking awesome!" Jinhwan slings himself into the seat next to him and slaps him on the back.
"Yea, thanks." He lifts his glass in a mock toast and takes a sip, his smile not reaching his eyes.
"Man, you've got to get out of your funk. Your solo album came out, you're promoting like a rock star. Why are you acting like an ungrateful bitch." He pinches his ear and shoves him off his hunched over position. It's not really a question, he already knows what's wrong, he just won't entertain it.
"Whatever man."
"Get your shit together, one last wallow. Then the kids are waiting in the backroom for a celebratory photo op. Gotta see the team supporting your ass." He orders, clutching his shoulder in support and admonishment, before bouncing away back into the crowd. He stares out over the crowd, all these people that came to see him perform, or rather came to be seen, came to be trendy and in the know. Their coolness depending solely by the coolness of those around them. He thinks about what he gave up for this.
A flash of something catches his eye and his breath when he sees the familiar lazy stroll coming in. He never comes to these things. Last place on Earth he wants to be he had told him. But he can see Jaewon has a firm grip on his hand and is dragging him further into the club with Raesang pushing him forward from the back. His new trio.
They catch each others' eyes because that's just how they work, their chemistry is instantaneous and there will never be a time when they can't just feel each others' presence. Hanbin gives him a nod, ever the professional, before Jaewon pulls him into the anonymous throng of people. Fuck. Just what he needed, a night of watching Jaewon fall even more in love and Rae hero worshipping the fuck out of Hanbin. One day Hanbin is going to move on, he's going to get over the shit he put him through and realize that there are other people out there wanting to tango with him. And Bobby's gonna have a front row seat through it all cause he chose it, he chose this for that, nothing comes without sacrifice. They both know that so well.
Draining the last of his whiskey and coke, he threads his way through people touching him and saying congrats and too many photo op requests. Gotta have proof of their coolness. He makes his way back to the private room where everyone is hanging out. Fucking Jaewon has Hanbin sitting on his lap like some prized possession, both arms wrapped around his waist, his head pressed underneath Hanbin's arm as he leans forward while talking with June.
"What, there's not enough seats back here?" Bobby asks with a clenched smile as he approaches the group. Never mind he'd had Hanbin sit this exact same way with him a thousand times, it was unnecessary and Jaewon didn't have the right to do that.
"Yea, there's one right behind you hyung if you want to sit." Hanbin tells him helpfully. He knows what he's playing at but Hanbin isn't going to change a single thing about himself to make Bobby more comfortable, not anymore. Bobby gives the eye smile that relaxes the sudden tension and sits down.
"Hyung, I heard you were on fire! But like literally, how the hell did you manage that?" Hanbin asks him, always the one to let things go.
"You should have seen it, one of the pyrotechnics went on the fritz on stage and started a fire and Bobby cool as day gets the barman to throw him a bottle of seltzer and he shakes it up and blasts it over the flames and the rest onto the crowd. And then he tells the crowd he's sorry for being too hot without missing a beat." Jinhwan wipes the tears from his eyes as he's retelling the story while Bobby tells hims, yes, you should have been there with his eyes. Hanbin laughs and ignores the accusation in Bobby's eyes. Rae comes in juggling three drinks and plops down into the sliver of space next to Hanbin and Jaewon. Hanbin shakes his head at the offered drink but Rae whispers something in his ear, probably assuring him it's non alcoholic and Hanbin accepts it with thanks.
"Hanbinnie, Mambinnie, Binnie-hyung! You're here, you're here! Why are you here? Are you here? Am I dreaming you up?" Chanwoo stumbles over, long gangly legs uncoordinated. Hanbin gets up immediately to help steady Chanwoo and he tilts into his arms while he grasps his face trying to look into his eyes to see if he's ok.
"Ya, how much did you drink? Hmmm? How much that you are in this state? Dreaming me up? Why, are you having a nightmare? I said two, just have two and you'll be okay!"
"Hyung, don't scold me! I don't feel so well." Chanwoo woozily buries his head into Hanbin's shoulder.
"Wait till you wake up tomorrow, then you'd rather have my scolding any day." He waves Jaewon out of his seat and steers Chanwoo down onto the couch. Chanwoo clutches at him pitifully.
"I'm glad you're here hyung. I don't like it when you're not." He pulls him down next to him and snuggles in, his giant frame dwarfing Hanbin.
"This is scary." Hanbin pleads for help.
"Chanwoo should not be allowed to drink anymore, my savage twin disappears and I'm lonely again." June pries Chanwoo's grip off of Hanbin letting him escape and sits down in his stead, letting him rewrap his arms around him and hopes he doesn't drool, or more importantly, puke.
A staff member asks them to gather together for a photo so they crowd in around Chanwoo. Deciding to all pretend to be sleeping since they can't get Chanwoo to do anything but blearily look up, they pile haphazardly on the couch winding up a jumbled mass of legs and arms. Bobby shoves himself in next to Hanbin while June squawks in protest from being squashed. He throws himself against Hanbin's lean line and he can feel him tense at the contact. Bobby tries to remember the last time he touched him and Hanbin relaxed from it. He does a prayer pose with his eyes shut, but he can't help but open his eyes and look up at the boy next to him. Hanbin is doing the eye rolled back mouth open sleep pose, its so funny it hurts. It just hurts to look at him and he really hopes everything will be ok, that he made the right decision, that they'll get passed all this, and be, what? Best of friends? Colleagues? Teammates? Bobby rejects each one. The camera flashes and he knows the picture is going to show him staring at Hanbin but he doesn't care, for once he just doesn't give a damn. Before everyone tries to separate he catches Jaweon staring fondly at Hanbin. A knowing smirk at his silliness and a sweetness in his eyes that's been growing since the day they met. A possessive flare rears up in his stomach. Bobby wants everything from Hanbin, to be his one and only, to take up his entire world and be the only thing he ever thinks about. Problem is, he had had that already. And he'd thrown it away.