Archive of Our Own

Little eleven year-old Sirius Black watched the rain as it poured down in sheets outside; the street lamp barely illuminating the street below it. His knuckles were white as he clutched the heavy drapes; he swallowed hard, barely able to contain his excitement...tomorrow, he'd be leaving his family to begin his magical education at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He heard the sound of footsteps approaching closer and he looked toward the closed bedroom door.

Orion Black knocked on the door and opened it as the boy realized that he'd missed his chance to dart toward his bed and dive beneath the duvet. The man smiled as he shook his head. "Nervous are you," he asked.

"I dunno Dad," Sirius replied. "A little, I reckon?"

Sirius' father sat down on the edge of the bed and patted the mattress beside him; the boy complied and trudged wearily toward the bed and plopped next to the handsome man with a sigh. Orion's hand rose to ruffle his eldest son's hair. "I remember being excited," he said.

Sirius' face contorted so that his perfectly bowed lips were nearly sideways..."Yeah, but you're you."

Orion nodded. "Yes, and you're you. So if you're a smidge nervous, it's alright. But I want you to understand that while you're about to go off into the big world and will be meeting all sorts of people, people who are beneath your station, you are representing the entire Black family and must act accordingly..."

"But Sissa's there too!"

Orion nodded. "Yes, but she's not the heir, is she? Besides, she's done quite well for herself. She's a prefect this year! Done the family quite proud, she has!"

"What if the other kids are mean to me?"

"Then you tell her and she will take care of it."

"I'm not a tattle-tale!"

"I know that Sirius, but this is different. You simply cannot allow these other...children...to push you into doing something that would surely be regretful..."

Sirius nodded. "I understand, Dad." I'm not going to have any friends, he thought to himself. I should be used to it...I don't have any now.

"Good. So, why don't you hop beneath the cover? Your mother wants to come up to say good night and I think Reggie is still..." He leaned forward to peer around the door frame toward his youngest son's door to see the smaller child pouting, his feet just inside the threshold of the doorway to his bedroom. He grinned and nodded toward his oldest and looked toward his Sirius grinned and nodded. Orion waved the tiny boy inside and beamed as the child's face lit up and watched as he all but flew as fast as lighting into his brother's room and jumped on the bed and snuggled with his brother beneath the duvet. He was proud of both of his boys, their magic had begun to take root at such a young age...kept him on his feet.

It warmed the heart of Orion Black to see his boys together like this, giggling, both scolding the other to be quiet before their mother raged up the stairs...Still, he made a point to mark this particular moment for extraction, so that he could remember it forever at a moment's notice...

______

Remus John Lupin sat at the table in his mother's kitchen scraping the golden fork against the plate, enjoying the last little bit of icing from the dark-chocolate fudge cake that his mother had baked for his going-away party...a party that consisted of only three people...his mother, his father and himself. He was used to it, but he didn't like it.

Hope Lupin leaned her hand on her chin and smiled toward her son, it was a sad smile...a worried smile, but still a loving smile. She and her husband were given every assurance by Headmaster Albus Dumbledore that Remus would remain safe and that the school's population would as well...no one could know of their son's condition; it was to be on a need to know basis. Still, they all wanted this opportunity for their son...a chance for some normalcy.

"Remus? I have something for you," his father, Lyall called out to his boy.

"Coming, Dad!"

Remus grinned toward his mother and nodded his head excitedly...he'd been waiting for this moment: when he'd finally receive his magical jumper...it was a family tradition that the oldest son receive a jumper from his father...within the fibers of the yarn was potent magic as well as strands of yarn from the father's jumper. Remus was fond of cardigans and that's exactly what his was to be...a chocolate-brown jumper with strands of nearly subliminal-purple of to bring out the green in his hazel eyes...there was more to the jumper that would be revealed to the boy when he tried it on. Lyall was wearing the jumper his father had gifted him with as he beamed with pride and handed the brightly gift-wrapped package to his son.

Remus studied the packaging of burgundy and gold with awe...he really didn't want to ruin the expensive paper and satin ribbons...but he wanted his jumper more. He looked toward his mother nervously. Sitting on his other side, she giggled and nodded. "Open it!"

Biting his lower lip, he turned his head toward his father as if to ask permission.

"Go on," Lyall whispered tenderly.

Remus pulled on the longest ribbon and watched with awe as it levitated toward the ceiling of their small sitting room, forming a burgundy and gold lion. The boy gasped as he watched the lion's head roar quietly, but proudly and he squealed, completely losing his composure, applauding and laughing as a child of his age should. He carefully removed the packaging and managed to remove it with only a minor tear, carefully placing it on the small table before him. Opening the box, he gazed upon the knitted fabric garment and finally took it into his hands and stood.

"It's so soft!"

Hope ran her fingers through her short hair, as her eyes welled up and her smile grew wider.

"Your mother's hair went into the yarn Son," Lyall said quietly. "Call it mother's magic, if you will."

Remus gasped as he looked to his mother. "Mummy, you cut your hair for me!"

"It's growing back, darling," she replied quietly. "You see, I was hoping that it would be like getting a hug from me when you put it on."

Remus threw his arms around his mother's neck and Lyall watched tears streamed down his wife's face as she held her only child close to her. "Thank you," he whispered.

"Let's get it on you, hmm," she asked.

Remus nodded excitedly and stood proudly and handed the garment to his father. Lyall shook it out gently, unfolding it then held out so that Remus could thread his arms into the sleeves. Remus' eyes widened...he could feel the ancient as well as the muggle magic that had been spun into the fibers of the handcrafted yarn. He remembered watching his mother spin the yarn herself by hand, having taken lessons from an elderly woman that lived in the last village they lived in.

Remus jetted out of the sitting room and ran to his parents' bedroom and looked at his reflection in the mirror...he breathed in deeply, observing the latest scar near his eye and was still healing. No! Don't look at your face, look at this magnificent piece of magic! He raised his arms, crossing them over his chest and then gave himself a gentle squeeze...he closed his eyes and smiled...it really did feel like a hug from his mother...He looked toward his reflection once again.

"You can do this, Remus Lupin. You can't let them down now." He breathed in deeply and smiled at his reflection.

_____

Sirius stood by his parents as they spoke with the pureblood families. Narcissa Black, his cousin tousled his perfectly coiffed hair. "Are you ready Siri?"

"I reckon," Sirius replied stiffly.

"You're going to look magnificent in the emerald green of Slytherin house!"

He rolled his eyes and then stared into her blue eyes. "Sissa, I would make Hufflepuff yellow look amazing!"

"HUFFLEPUFF," his mother, Walburga Black exclaimed.

"Relax Walburga," Narcissa said, hoping to soothe her cousin's ire. "We were merely discussing color and fashion!"

Sirius steeled himself as he watched his mother's eyes roll and her nose raise into the air. "Mmm. Well, just make certain that you find yourself in emerald green. Clear?"

"Crystal," Sirius replied, staring at the black buttons of her overcoat.

"Sirius, try to have fun. Learn all you can whilst you're there. You'll make friends, don't worry so. Just remember what we discussed and you'll be fine."

"Just don't go making friends with the wrong sort," his mother warned.

"Bergie, please? He knows the rules."

"And I know my son," she replied as she cast a disdainful glance toward her oldest child, pretending to straighten his tie, tightening the knot closer to his throat so that he coughed from lack of air.

His parents said their goodbyes and watched him head for the train. Then he heard his brother Regulus call out to him, running back through the crowd. Sirius was nearly on the train and he stopped instantly, causing the boy behind him to bump into him. "Sorry," he said, looking into the face of a small boy with the cut over his eye.

"S'okay," he said shyly.

"Excuse me," Sirius said, staring into the boy's eyes.

"Oh, sorry. Yeah." He looked behind him and moved off the metal stairs, allowing Sirius to backtrack down to the platform.

"Reggie! What is it?" He saw his father towering over the others, watching them.

"You'll write yeah," Regulus asked.

Sirius nodded. "Of course," he said. "I've got to go..."

"Siri! You'll make lots of friends and forget all about me," Regulus whined.

"I rather doubt that Reggie." He put his arm around his brother's neck and tousled his hair with the knuckles of his face. Then he felt his brother's arms around his waist and his icy demeanor melted. "It's gonna be alright...It'll be Christmas before you know it, you'll see!"

"Promise?"

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, I promise."

Regulus released him and held up his hand, his tiny finger extended. "Pinky swear!"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "I'm too old for pinky swear, Reg," he grumbled.

"You're NEVER too old for pinky swear!"

Sirius huffed.

"SWEAR IT!"

Sirius huffed again and grabbed at his brother's hand with his pinky. "I swear it!"

Regulus embraced his brother one last time as their father came to collect the younger boy.

"Glad I don't have one of those," another boy mumbled.

Sirius' head turned slowly and stared at the boy with the black hair and glasses; none other than James Potter. "Wot?"

"I said, I'm glad that I don't have one of those!"

"Yeah, me too. One less Potter!"

"TAKE IT BACK, BLACK!"

"NO."

"What's going on here, boys," Orion asked as he glared at the Potter-boy.

"Nothing Dad," Sirius said. "A...misunderstanding is all."

"Good," Orion replied with a nod of his head as he eyed Fleamont Potter approaching. "On your way, Mister Potter."

"Yes, SIR..."

Fleamont Potter tilted and then shook his head. "You should apologize to Sirius when you see him next. He's a good kid and so are you. With any luck you two can be at least amicable."

"Dad!"

"Promise me, Son?"

"Fine, I promise," James grumbled.

"Good, off you go! Have a great time!"

Orion's eyes gazed over his sons' heads straight into the eyes of his one-time friend, Potter. He sighed as he shook his head. The elder Potter watched his son board the train. Then everyone within earshot heard Walburga Black screech her husband's name and Orion closed his eyes and swallowed hard.

"Dad, you certain that you two are going to be alright? You won't have me to take the brunt of her...you know..."

Orion took his eldest by his shoulders and turned him around. "We'll be fine...go! Enjoy your reprieve!"

Sirius rejoined the queue to board the train once more and he filed in with the students looking for a compartment to share. He walked the aisle twice, entering and leaving three separate cars before find a compartment that wasn't full or nearly full of people he was warned not to associate with or girls...he didn't care for girls that much...they talked far too much and always stared at him with googly eyes.

He slid the door and saw a small heavy-looking boy sitting next to the boy with the scars. He looked up from his book and smiles toward him. "Hey! Get your little brother sorted out?

"Yeah," Sirius replied, half smiling.

"Wish I had a little brother," Remus mused.

Sirius chuckled. "You can borrow mine!" Then they heard a throat clearing. Sirius' eyes moved toward the figure sitting in the corner of the compartment. And Sirius groaned. "No way am I sitting here."

"While I got you here, I am supposed to convey my apologies. So, I apologize, your Royal Ssssnakinesssss."

"Sod off, Potter."

"You first Black."

"Come on, guys," the unknown boy said, standing up between them. Remus gazed up nervously toward the two boys about to go fist-to-cuffs.

"Who are you," Sirius asked.

"My name is Peter, Peter Pettigrew."

"I don't know that name," Sirius replied quietly.

James sighed. "Too bad, Petie old chap! You're on the wrong team!"

"What team is that?"

"You're not a pureblood. Neither is Mister Lupin here!"

"Lupin...? Who's your father?"

"Lyall Lupin," Remus said proudly.

"Heard your dad was asked to teach defense a few years ago? Turned it down..."

"Yeah," Remus replied quietly as he lowered his head.

"That's unfortunate. I heard he is really good!"

Remus smiled brightly as he looked up into Sirius' eyes. "Awww, he's the BEST!"

Sirius smiled as he nodded. He hadn't noticed that James had already returned to his seat.

___

Midway through their trip north, Sirius had scored sweets from the trolley and brought the lot to the boys sharing the compartment with him. Remus had dozed off while reading and Peter and James were sleeping as well. Sirius was nocturnal by nature and he was wide awake. He sat on the bench seat and nudged Remus awake and offered him a chocolate frog. His smile grew at having seen the smaller boy's face light up. He leaned over and tapped Peter's leg and handed him several sweets, a pumpkin pastie and a pumpkin juice. "You look like you need this more than I do," he said.

"Thanks! I'm famished!"

"Enjoy, mate!"

"I will! Thanks Sirius!"

Sirius nodded, then turned his attention toward Potter who was leaning against the cool window. He looked through his loot and held up a long sugar snake and grinned.

"What are you going to do," Peter asked nervously.

"You'll see," he said.

Sirius stood stealthily and placed the sugary confection on top of James' head so that the one end was laying on his glasses; he returned to his seat and noshed on a sugar quill as he kicked James' shoe with his own. James' eyes flew open and he glared toward Sirius, who was smirking broadly and nodding.

Then he saw the sugar-snake and screamed as his hands flew toward his head to rid himself of it. This caused Sirius and Peter to laugh boisterously and Remus' face turned red as he held his laughter in as best as he could. James saw the confection resting on his lap and he picked it up and chomped off the head and threw it back at Sirius.

"You bastard," James groaned.

"Hey, my parents are married, sadly!"

James sniggered and he pointed toward him. "Paybacks, Black!"

Sirius nodded. "I look forward to it!"

James stood and looked toward Sirius' loot and rooted through it. "What you got there anyway!"

"Dunno really? I just grabbed stuff. There's another juice though. She only had the two left. Pete's got the one."

James grabbed a box of Bertie Bots and a chocolate frog. "So, let's talk houses?"

Sirius rolled his eyes and groaned. "Lets not and say we did."

"So Pete, you first! If you had a choice, what house do you want to go to?"

"Anything but Slytherin!"

"Ah, but then Sirius will have a friend, won't you Sirius?"

"James...." Remus whispered. He shook his head and then looked to the sweets still in his lap. "Honestly!"

"Well it's true! There's never been a Black who wasn't in the snake den!"

"He's right, I'm afraid," Sirius mused.

"Well then, probably Hufflepuff," Peter said.

"Ah, the minions," Sirius blurted out.

"Have you no shame Black!"

"What! It's a proven fact that Hufflepuffs are hard workers! Society needs them!"

"You're right Sirius," Peter said. "I'm a hard worker. I have to be. I'm a bit thick and I don't often get things right away. Sometimes not at all."

Sirius stared hard at Peter, trying to think how to frame his words carefully. "I can help you, Peter. I've already read up to the third year's course work and I can do most of the required spells..."

"You! You can do third year stuff," James exclaimed.

"Yeah," Sirius replied.

"Really," Remus whispered. "Blimey!"

'Yeah," Sirius said nodding his head and added quietly, "I get sent to my room a lot."

James laughed. "You must be a regular criminal!"

Once again, Sirius' eyes met with James'. "According to mother, an exceptional one."

"Does your mother really hate you that much, Sirius," Peter asked innocently.

Sirius' demeanor turned icy as he stared Peter down. "Yeah. She does."

"I'm sorry," Remus whispered.

"Don't worry yourself. I'm used to it," he said as he looked through the window into the darkness.

"I always worry." He ran his fingers along the sleeve of his jumper and he realized that if anyone needed an honest to goodness maternal embrace, it was this boy. He rose and removed his jumper and held it out to him.

"What's this?"

"It's a jumper."

"I can see that," Sirius replied.

"Well, it's magical," Remus continued. "Within the fibers are fibers from jumpers dating back, I don't know how many generations and also, my mother's hair. She's muggle, but I really do feel safe when I have it on. She said that she hoped that if I ever needed a hug, that I was to put it on and hug myself. I know it sounds funny, but it works. It really works!"

Sirius' nostrils flared as he felt his face grow hot...he realized where this boy was going with this...and he willed himself not to cry in front of these boys...

"And, if anyone needed an honest to goodness genuine hug mate, it's you."

Sirius' mouth tightened up into a little bow as he felt a tear slip from his left eye as he glared at his new friend.

James stared at the boy who he'd once thought of as an enemy...and he felt awful.

"Here, put it on. It might bring you luck!"

Sirius looked toward the other two boys. "What else have I got to lose, right?" He removed his suit jacket and tossed it onto the bench seat, then held out his hand to receive the jumper. It looked too small, but it seemed to magically adjust to his size. "It's a perfect fit," he exclaimed.

"Yes," Remus replied. "It's supposed to grow with you."

"Well," Peter continued as he pried his eyes from the handsome, but obviously miserable  boy toward James. "We know where James is headed..."

"Gryffindor!"

Peter rolled his eyes. "Right," he chuckled. "Where would you like to go, Remus?"

"My father was sorted into Gryffindor, so I think I'd like to go there. That would make him very happy."

"But you're so bookish," Sirius said, still looking through the window. Finally, he turned his gaze toward Remus.

Remus nodded. "How'd you know?"

Sirius tilted the book that was lying between them. "Lucky guess," he chuckled.

Remus laughed, then the three joined him.

"You know, I was thinking about your name, Remus?"

"Oh?"

"Yeah. It's like Wolfy McWolf or something!"

"You think that's funny?"

"Yeah, I do!"

"I don't get it," Peter said.

Remus merely stared toward James who continued giggling. Sirius was now giggling as well, as was Peter. Then Sirius ceased abruptly and looked toward James. "Not funny," he said with a dead pan tone to his voice.

Remus breathed in deeply. "But you know what is funny? My mother's maiden name..."

"Which is?"

"Howell."

Remus watched Sirius suck in his lips as he nodded. Sirius managed not to laugh for about ten seconds or so, before he had to let it out, lest it consume him.

"In all seriousness," James said, looking toward the handsome boy across from him. Sirius grinned and craned his brow high. "Yes, that was on purpose."

"Careful, I love puns," Sirius warned.

"Oh dear," Remus said as he looked toward James.

"Wot," James asked. He held up both hands in defense. "All kidding aside, Sirius? What house do you want to go to?"

"Anything but Slytherin."

"Really!"

"Seriously," Sirius exclaimed with a lopsided, toothy grin and a craned brow.

"Alright! That's it," Remus exclaimed standing up. "We have to make a pact right now, the four of us! UP ON YOUR FEET! ALL THREE OF YA!"

Sirius was the last to leave his seat. When he did finally, Remus held out his hand, face down and took Sirius' hand and placed it over his own and then Peter's and then James'. "We all have to solemnly swear never to use puns in front of this man!"

"Why? I don't mind, Siriusly."

"Yeah, we can be like the four musketeers," Peter said. "Let's promise that we'll stay friends, no matter where we get sorted?"

"Agreed," James replied.

"Les Quatre Mousquetaire," Sirius said fluently.

Remus felt lighter than he had in years as he nodded his head...he finally had friends. "It's begun," he whispered to himself.