Chapter Text
Originally posted on Tumblr
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April 12
It has been exactly three weeks since you were sent on your mission, Natasha, and exactly one week since you were meant to be home. Fury promised this time. He promised you would be home by now. Each day my worry for you grows along with the vividness of my imagination. Please, just come home and prove my mind wrong.
The Director is going to try to get my letters to you, where ever you are. Come home. Please.
~ Clint
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April 20
Hey, Nat. Did you get my previous letter? I’ve started to dream about what might be happening to you, and it’s honestly scaring me. They aren’t dreams, they are nightmares. I jolt awake, every single time, and call out your name. Usually you’re there to tell me it’s just my mind, that we’re both safe. But you aren’t.
Stark fell out of the sky today. The idiot flew into a building and broke something in his suit, causing him to fall to the ground. Fury was enraged at him, it was great. I wish you had been there to see it. Turns out Stark had been on the phone to Pepper, talking about some random thing. Just come home before you miss anything else.
~ Clint
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May 2
Sorry I didn’t get to write for a while, Hill had me doing more paperwork than is possible. I’ve been refusing to go on missions, not until you come home safe. I don’t want to be gone when you come back. I want to be with you the second you touch back with us.
Nothing really important has been happening. Stark had to pay for the damage of falling out of the sky, Thor ate way too many packets of Poptarts, Pepper somehow got onto the Helicarrier and spazzed out at Stark. Yeah, just the usual. Come home, please? I miss you. I can’t sleep at night without seeing you hurt in my dreams. Please be okay.
~ Clint
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May 15
Some idiot broke my bow today. Not the nice one you bought me for Christmas last year, but the one S.H.I.E.L.D. gave me for missions and training. I was wondering why Hill was trying to sooth talk me on my way to training. The string had been cut and it was all dinted and bent in the wrong places. I got mad and went looking for you so I could find comfort. You weren’t there. It’s nearly been two months you’ve been gone, please just come home.
I haven’t told you this, but at night and in the mornings I make two serves of the meal, one for you. I can’t get out of the routine of you in my life. I need to see you’re okay. Need to see that you’re not hurt or worse.
~ Clint
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May 30
A lock of your hair was sent in to us today. Natasha, a lock of your red hair. I couldn’t cope at the sight of it, I was so bad they sent me into medical before home. Please, I beg you, come home! Every waking and sleeping hour I see you in pain, see them hurting you.
Steve came over earlier to watch me and make sure I was okay, though he seemed pretty distressed too. I know Hill sent him over, I just know it.
I need you home. I need you. Please. Be alive.
~ Clint
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June 5
Nat, where are you? Lives are breaking down here without you. Hill locked me in my apartment because I didn’t pass clearance to work. She is stressed at you gone too. People here love you and need you. If you get these, could you just send a sign that you are alive? I hallucinate every second that you’re dead or being tortured. I haven’t slept in weeks.
I’m begging you, come home!
~ Clint
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June 13
Come home, now. Please. Everything is drenched in my tears for you. The other Avengers and Pepper take rotations at my apartment to keep check on me. Most of them have been crying too. Did I mention we got another lock of your hair yesterday? Well, we did. It sent us over the edge.
Tasha, I can’t function, can’t live without you. The Avengers have been looking for you for over a month with their systems, but I only found out today. They can’t find you. Come home.
~ Clint
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June 20
I can’t live without you, Natasha. I just can’t do it anymore. My hands are shaking as I write, they have been shaking for days now. Come home soon, please! I need-
“Natasha?” Clint asked with wide eyes. Before him his bedroom door was open and she was leaning on the frame, shoulders hunched and covered in dried blood. In her hand were a bunch of white pieces of paper. Letters.