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“Are you sure about this?” Yes.
“Jimin—there’s a lot, a lot, of things you could be, a lot of things you could do. You’re turning your back on all of that, and for what? For him?” Yes.
The poor signal of the call makes Seokjin’s wavering voice waver even more and it’s all unnerving to Jimin. He knows he’s set on his decision but somehow the pull of Seokjin’s convincing voice is tugging at a small part of him and giving him second thoughts. Is this alright? He’s running away from his parents, running away from his city, from his life, and yes, running away for Min Yoongi. Is all of this alright?
His pulse raises and he feels betrayed that he’s thinking of setting aside Yoongi, he feels betrayed for Yoongi and he knows Yoongi will feel betrayed too if now that they’re minutes away from departure is he having thoughts of cancelling. You can tell me if you don’t want to, we can stop if you don’t want to, Yoongi had told him months ago when they have first talked about the possibility of doing it. He was stone-hard set on the idea from the start and he wanted nothing but to just quickly get it over with but Yoongi wanted him to be just as sure as he is and waited for him for months. All those time and now, now is he hesitating?
He worries on his bottom lip and he transfers the phone to his other hand. A shaky breath escapes him and he had to clutch the device in both hand to make sure his hand won’t give in. “Hyung, I’m—"
“Jiminie?”
Yoongi’s gentle voice pulled him out of his concentration but with a start. Eyes flickering in between Yoongi’s worried ones made him feel so guilty he couldn’t help his brows furrowing and lips thinning. The reaction didn’t go unseen as Yoongi’s frown deepens and he looks at him with the same guilty eyes.
“Jiminie, if you don’t—”
“No, hyung it’s just…”
“Sunshine, you know we don’t have to do this.”
“But we do.”
How else am I going to love you? To be allowed to?
Jimin looks down and without another moment, Yoongi is crouching in front of him, one hand clasping Jimin’s small ones and the other on his knee comfortingly.
“Jiminie, what do you want to do?”
Having heard the question he himself is asking, Jimin’s face contorts and he doesn’t even realize he’s sobbing until Yoongi’s hands come up to cup his cheeks. The elder shushes him comfortingly; his thumb caresses both sides of his face and Jimin feels his chest tightens and more sobs spills out of his lips.
“I want… want to—” Jimin feels no control over his voice and he’s shaking all over, but he pushes all of his strength to voice out what he wants to reply to Yoongi. “I want to dance, I want to hang out with my friends, want to sing—I want to drive a car and play with kids, I want to be accepted by my family, I want to…” He opens his eyes to look at Yoongi and his heart breaks. “I want to be with you, Yoongi-hyung, please… I want to continue loving you.”
“Oh, Minie, come here.” Yoongi pulls him down and into his arms. For a few seconds, he just revels in the warm feeling of Yoongi’s hands rubbing circles on his back. He waits until his sobbing calms down and when it does, he pulls away from Yoongi’s hold to look him in the eyes.
“Yoongi-hyung…” He starts but Yoongi smiles at him and cups his face again, brushing hair strands here and there, silently asking to speak first before Jimin does.
“Jiminie, whatever you want to do, I’ll support you, I’ll be there with you. You know it doesn’t have to be this or that, I can make it this and that. We can, sunshine. If you want to do all those things back at home, we can, it’ll be hard but we can. If you want to do all those things anew somewhere else, we can, but it will still be hard. Wherever we are, it will be hard, less for some things on one and much for the other. Sunshine, you choose which one you can stand the most; you pick.”
Air finally enters his lungs without being painful and he breathes in and out slowly. His heart is still beating hard against his ribs but he feels lighter. Jimin brings his hands up to hold onto Yoongi’s beside his face. His chest tightens for different reasons and he’s still antsy but as Yoongi smiles at him, sure and soft, the smile breaking from his own face makes everything seem just a little bit not as complicated as it all is. He’s daring, newly so and it’s a strange feeling. He used to just hide and escape from his problems and his choices but as he basks in Yoongi’s presence, the man who makes his every bit warm and excited and cozy, he welcomes the feeling of boldness. It’ll be fine. Everything will be fine and everything will work out. And Yoongi will stay just right beside him through it all. It’s fine.
“Let’s go, hyung.”
Only when Jimin’s seated by the window on the bus did he remember that he forgot about Seokjin. He panics as he goes for his phone and groans as he sees the call ended but with a bunch of messages from the man. Nervousness swims in his chest to his fingertips but as he reads out every single text, all of it was replaced with relief and giddiness. The teeth biting on his lips disappear inside as the corner of his lips pull slightly in a small smile. It’ll be fine.
[from: Jin hyung] 2:12am
Ah I see
If that’s what you want, Jimin, if that’s what you really choose
I understand, I’m happy for you.
I’m still worried but I’m sure Yoongi will take good care of the both of you.
Don’t stop being in contact with us though!! >:[
[from: Jin hyung] 12:51am
Stay safe
{end}