Chapter Text
The silent voice within one's heart whispers the most profound wisdom.
- Nyx
After a long day of battling through Shido’s palace, the meeting of the Phantom Thieves drew to a close. The group, for a short time, collectively forgot their burdens and enjoyed their time together.
Makoto, nervous, anxiously eyed Akira, expecting, or maybe hoping, for him to approach her. He instead started talking with Futaba. She laughed at something he said.
All of a sudden, Makoto felt a wave of embarrassment overtake her. She quickly looked away from Futaba, and let her eye wander around the group.
Around her, Ann and Ryuji were petting and teasing Morgana, now reduced to a simple housecat. Ann was petting him, and Ryuji was laughing about something.
Sojiro lazily leaned back in front of the counter nearby, staring straight ahead and thinking about something. Makoto wondered if he ever noticed how the Thieves had conversations with Mona-chan.
Yusuke and Haru were chatting about something. They both had a warm smile on their face.
All of a sudden, she felt someone nudge her arm from behind. “Whatcha looking at?”
“Oh!” She whipped around. “Hi, Skull.”
“We’re back in LeBlanc. There’s no need to use codenames,” he grinned, “Oh, unless you just like hearing me call you Queen?”
“Very funny,” Makoto deadpanned. Her gaze lazily drifted back towards Joker and Futaba’s lively conversation. She sure laughed a lot at his jokes.
“Spying on Futaba and Joker, huh?”
“W-what!?”
Ryuji had a sensible chuckle. “You’re blushing, you know.”
“Shut up!” Her embarrassment was so potent that it seemed her whole body was welling up with boiling water.
“God, Nijima-san,” Ryuji said, “who knew you would be such a stereotypical schoolgirl?”
Makoto, furious and at a loss for words, ran out of LeBlanc.
Once she was out the door, the downpour all around her reminded her that she had completely forgotten her bag and coat, and had left her umbrella at home. The rain seemed to calm her down a bit, at least.
Ryuji came out the entrance after her. “Hey, I was just teasing! Are you alright?”
“Yes, I’m fine,” she fumed. She stood under LeBlanc’s awning for a second, unsure of what to do. She turned to Ryuji. “Would you go back in and grab my things? I don’t want to embarrass myself by going back in there.”
“Sure thing, Queen,” Ryuji smiled. God, he was so dumb, but it was charming, in a way. He dutifully ran back into LeBlanc. Makoto, with nothing else to do, waited by the door and looked out into the rain, and tried to face the truth.
Ever since Joker started at Shujin Academy, she hadn’t been the same person. Following the trail of the Phantom Thieves, and eventually joining them, she had come to doubt nearly everything she had taken for granted. Her career goals, her dedication to school, how she spent her time, her notion of right and wrong, the nature of reality, even…
At the same time, she had become more rebellious than she had ever been, and more open-minded and sociable. Akira had begun “expanding her horizons”…
Now that she thought about it, wasn’t that just a thin excuse to get him to spend time with her?
And the act of pretending to be her boyfriend–was it even Eiko-chan who first suggested that, or was it her?
Maybe Ryuji was right. She was a cliché. Maybe her next move would be to plan a trip with Joker and accidentally book a hotel room with only one bed.
Jesus, not bad.
The door to LeBlanc opened, and Ryuji came out with both Makoto’s things and his. He handed Makoto her coat and purse, and said, “I thought I’d offer to walk you home to make up for… well, calling you out, I guess.”
She smiled. “Thanks, I’d appreciate it.” Letting Ryuji walk her home was probably something the Makoto of last fall would have never done.
Ryuji unfolded his umbrella and began to tread through the rain, and Makoto followed close behind him, struggling to keep pace with his lanky gait.
“About Joker…”
“Oh?” Ryuji looked at her with a toothy grin. Makoto already felt embarrassed. “Can I trust you, Sakamoto-san?” she asked.
“Hey, your secret’s safe with me,” he said, and made a gesture of zipping his lips, which Makoto was pretty sure only dads do.
“It’s… do you know anything about him and Futaba?”
“Oh, yeah. Well, I think he’s just doing his part to get her out of her cage, you know? Help her re-adjust to society. Plus, you know, she’s basically Sojiro’s daughter, so he probably thinks of her sort of like a sister."
“Like a sister,” Makoto repeated.
“What was that?”
“Oh, uh, nothing. Well, I suppose I was being silly. Does…” Makoto balled her fists up and looked directly down, but her anxiety about what she was about to say persisted. God, she felt like she was going to E-X-P-L-O-D-E. But it was now or never.
“Ryuji, do you know if Akira… feels the same way about me?”
“Haha, I don’t know!” Ryuji’s answer came suddenly.
“I…” Makoto stopped in her tracks, and Ryuji stopped with her. All of a sudden, for some reason, she felt sort of relieved?
“Well, thanks for being honest.”
“Yeah, it’s just,” Ryuji explained, “whenever we hang out, we sort of always end up talking about my problems. I guess that’s selfish of me, but Akira’s just that sort of guy, you know?"
“Yeah, I think I know what you mean.” They started walking together through the rain again, and continued together in content silence until they reached the station.
“Well, here we are,” Ryuji remarked.
“Yes,” Makoto said softly. “Ryuji, would you mind spending a little more time with me?”
Ryuji was clearly a little surprised by the offer, but made himself game. He accompanied her into the station and onto the crowded subway train. They managed to find adjacent seats. They were mostly silent doing so.
Makoto, all of a sudden, remarked, “Does the Metaverse ever kind of freak you out to think about?”
Ryuji simply responded, “I try not to think about it…”
After a while, they both pulled out their phones. Makoto took the opportunity to text Akira.
“Just so you know, I went home a little early. Ryuji’s with me.”
Akira responded quickly, “I know, he’s texting me right now.”
Makoto quietly giggled to herself reading this. He looked over at Ryuji, who was now playing some kind of fishing game on his phone.
“He said you were acting weird. Everything okay?”
“Yes, I’m perfectly alright. How are you?”
“All good here. I walked Futaba home and I’m just helping Sojiro close the cafe out right now.”
“How nice.” Why did she type that? What a weird thing to say. She put her phone away.
“YEAH!!!!” Ryuji shouted all of a sudden, jumping out of his seat and pumped his fist in the air.
“Ryuji, what happened?” Makoto asked, alarmed.
“I caught a shark! Two hundred thirty pounds!!!”
Makoto, and some others in the subway car, laughed.
After a fairly short ride, they arrived at Makoto’s stop. Impulsively, Makoto asked if Ryuji wanted to come up to her apartment, and Ryuji, now miles away from his own home, responded yes.
As they walked up to Makoto’s home, Makoto thought aloud, “Oh, there’s some rice wine we could share if you want.”
“Wow, student council president of the year,” Ryuji joked.
“Yeah, underage drinking and vigilante justice are my two vices.”
Ryuji laughed, and agreed to indulge Makoto’s need for teen rebellion.
As they walked up to the door, Makoto fumbled around in her bag for her key for a while, until the door suddenly opened in front of them. It was Sae, with a martini in hand.
“Oh, Makoto! I didn’t realize you’d brought a… friend,” she said.
Ryuji laughed and scratched his hair.
“Oh,” Sae said, “I know you! You’re one of the Phantom Thieves, right?”
“Sis!” Makoto fumed.
“Oops, I’m sorry!”
Ryuji laughed. “It’s okay, Makoto,” he said, “No one heard us. I’m Ryuji Sakomoto. Nice to meet you again, Prosecutor Niijima.” He extended his hand out, and received a loose, drunken approximation of a handshake in response.
“Well,” Sae said, half-seriously, “try not to cause too much trouble while you’re here.”
“We won’t,” Makoto responded. Her older sister sipped her martini and turned back into the apartment. Makoto, embarassed, grabbed Ryuji’s arm and led him to her room.
After closing the door behind them, Ryuji sat down on her bed.
“I guess your sister doesn’t have much to do since we’ve been on Shido’s case,” Ryuji said.
“She’s awaiting her chance to prosecute him. Since she got fired from investigating… us, she’s been a little out of it.”
“She’s still looking fine, though.”
Makoto flung her bookbag at Ryuji. It hit him in the stomach.
“Hey, I’m just kidding!”
“She’s twice your age! Boys have no morals, do they?”
“You’re telling me.”
Makoto awkwardly sat down on the bed next to him.
“So,” Ryuji turned to her, “I was promised sake?”
“Oh!” Makoto got up, and started rummaging under her bed. “Great idea.” She pulled out the bottle of sake.
“It’s not even chilled? Man…”
“Hey,” Makoto snapped, “just be happy you get to drink with the student council president.”
Ryuji waited a moment, as Makoto struggled to twist open the bottle. “Was that a joke?”
“Yes!!!”
“Oh.” He laughed out of pity. Makoto, frustrated, gave the bottle one last twist and it finally clicked open. She unscrewed the cap. “Oh, I should get some sakazukis.” She set the bottle down on her desk and hurried out of the bedroom.
Outside, she attracted the glare of Sae, who had since finished her martini and poured herself another and was looking at something on her laptop. As Makoto walked over to the kitchen cupboard, she began talking to her.
“So,” Sae started, looking up from her computer, “this is the first time you’ve brought a boy home.”
“Yes,” Makoto flung open some cupboards, “What about it?”
“Well, it’s just,” Sae stumbled on her words, “I don’t know.”
“What?” Makoto rummaged through the pottery.
“I always assumed you were, you know.”
“I was what?”
“I just always thought that you, well, leant the other way.”
“What!” Makoto whipped around.
“I mean, with the hair and the bike…”
“Oh my god!!!”
“Sorry!”
“Sis!!!”
Sae just shrugged. Embarassed, Makoto reached back into the cupboard and grabbed the two sakazukis she needed and ran back to her bedroom. As her hand turned the doorknob, she turned around, yelled to Sae, “I’m not gay!!!” and slammed the door behind her.
She walked back into the room to see Ryuji staring at her, eyes widened, stone-faced.
He immediately burst into laughter.
“Shut the fuck up!!!”
Outside, Makoto could hear her sister also laughing. She immediately rushed to punch Ryuji in the gut.
The ruckus reckoning of the Niijima household eventually died down, and Ryuji was left on the floor after taking quite a few punches, tears streaming down his face from laughter. At some point, Makoto heard her sister retire into her room to nap off her martinis. “Are you done?” she asked Ryuji, coldly.
“Just about,” he wheezed. “Oh my god, that wasn’t even that funny.”
“Are you ready to drink, because I am.”
“Yeah, sure thing.”
She poured the sake until both cups were filled, and offered it to Ryuji, who was now sitting on the floor. She sat down next to him with her own cup.
“Do you think we should toast?” she asked, genuinely.
“Sure. To the gay community!” Ryuji thrust his cup into the air.
“To banging Akira!” Makoto did the same.
They both laughed a bit, and took their shots.
***
“Ryuji,” Makoto said, lying down and looking at the ceiling, “Have you ever been in love?” She had underestimated the power of rice-wine.
“Once,” Ryuji responded, also lying down, “in fifth grade, someone showed me a page that they had torn out of a magazine of a girl with three nipples. That was the first time I ever saw boobs.”
“So,” Makoto asked, confused, “wait, what?”
“I was in love with her.”
“That… makes sense.”
“Also Ann.”
“Mmhmm.”
Makoto stared at the ceiling. She was beginning to drift off.
Ryuji yawned loudly. “Hey, are you also like really tired?”
“Yeah.”
They both said nothing, and, after a minute, fell asleep on the floor.
***
Makoto woke up next morning, severely hungover, and still on the floor. She fumbled for her phone to check the time. It was already nine AM, but it was a Sunday, so she at least didn’t have to go to school like this. She checked her texts.
There was one from Ryuji, at 3AM, which said, “Didn’t want to wake you so I just saw myself out when I woke up. Thanks for the good time, Ms. Student Council President. Also I’m gonna puke in this empty train car”. Makoto instantly felt something coming up from her stomach after reading that but suppressed it down.
There were two texts in the Phantom Thieves group chat, which read,
Haru: “Are we going to infiltrate the Palace again today, Joker?”
Akira: “Nah, I’m with my boy Oda today. Enjoy your day off, everyone,” and then a peace sign emoji, which seemed like a very casual way to tell someone they’re postponing avenging the death of their father.
Makoto coughed, lifted herself up weakly, fell face down into her bed, and drifted back to sleep after a while.
She woke back up around 10:30 to the smell of Sae making eggs in the next room. She reached again for her phone, and composed a text.
“Akira, can I see you tomorrow?”
She got a reply back instantly. “Are we meeting Eiko again?”
“No, it’ll just be me. It’s kind of important. Can you make it?”
“Of course.”
She smiled to herself, turned her phone off, and went back to sleep.