Work Text:
Harry and Draco had decided almost the moment they returned home from watching their girls be Sorted that they really wanted more kids. They'd been thinking about it for a while, but when actually faced with an “empty” house, rather than relax – as they expected – they quickly grew bored. Thus, Draco made a new batch of fertility potions for them to take, only this time, he didn't feel the need to make them so strong. Regular strength would do just fine, thank you very much.
So it was that on the first day of the summer hols, both men were busy with newborn infants. Now that he was no longer pregnant, Draco found it funny that they had unintentionally had their two sons mere days before the girls' birthday. This meant that Draco had his birthday on the Fifth, the boys on the Twelfth, and the girls on the Sixteenth. Harry was the only member of their little family that wasn't born in June!
Anyway, being busy with babies, the men sent Narcissa, Winky, Dukie, and Kreacher to pick up the girls from King's cross station. They waited anxiously at home, pacing back and forth to calm their fussy boys. The moment the girls returned, they broke out into huge grins and shifted the boys so that they could receive loving and teary eyed hugs. Sure enough, the girls broke out into joyous grins and raced to claim hugs.
“GRANDPA!” They cried out as they swamped Lucius and nearly knocked him over in their enthusiasm. He returned their hugs and kisses with as much dignity as he could muster considering they had succeeded in off balancing him so that he tumbled onto his arse.
“Oi! We're here too!” Harry pointed out, feeling disgruntled.
Giggling as they finished attacking their grandfather, the girls looked over at Harry and spotted something very important. “AWW! Is that our new brother?!” Half of them ran to Harry while they other half surrounded Draco. All four of them purred as they stroked the babies on their soft heads.
“Missed you too,” Draco grumbled dryly.
“Of course we missed you, daddy, don't be silly!” Nym chided, holding out her hands in a silent demand to hold her brother. The girls all took turns holding their brothers – cooing at them, tickling their feet, and giving them a thousand tiny kisses – until the boys got hungry and started wailing. The moment Harry and Draco took back their babies, the girls grabbed their grandfather by the hands and dragged him away. “Come on, grampy, we've got plans for you!”
“I shudder to ask,” Lucius drawled in his haughty, aristocratic voice.
“Come on, grampy, come on!” They urged, still dragging him toward their lab. “We've been waiting months for this!”
“If I must,” he capitulated with a feigned put upon sigh.
When they arrived in the lab, Lucius immediately noticed that the house elves had already unpacked all the equipment that the girls had brought to (and thus back from) Hogwarts with them. Cis grabbed a pair of bulbous goggles and yanked on him until he was bent over far enough that she could jam them on his head.
“We spelled these to be Impervius,” Lil explained without really explaining anything. “They're also made with state of the art technology so that you can see things that you wouldn't be able to otherwise.”
“They're intended to protect your eyes from lasers,” Gem added as she pulled a twelve inch or so doll out of her pocket. Her sisters all produced a doll too.
“Lasers?” Lucius questioned a bit apprehensively.
“We made these robots to look just like you,” Lil informed him proudly.
“We need you to help us test them,” Cis stated as she fiddled with the doll's shoe – opening a panel to push the button that switched the robot from sleep mode to awake.
“They have highly sophisticated AI programming and mechanics so that they can move around like little ninjas!” Gem announced with a grin. She woke her doll up too.
“They can learn and are highly intuitive, and we've warded them so that magical fields don't interfere with their functioning,” Nym added. “So be prepared to defend yourself! Try not to blow them up, but we're really interested to see how they'll react to stunning charms and basically anything else you can think of.”
“Er... wait,” Lucius bade, not entirely certain he liked this idea. But it was too late. His granddaughters had already turned the robots loose and were now piling into a glass cage so that they could observe the battle without getting caught up in it.
The roundabout warning concerning lasers became apparent when one of the mini Lucius-bots pulled out a gun and shot Lucius in the foot.
“OW!” He cried out, hopping a bit to shake off the pain as he pulled out his wand and aimed it at the bot. “Stupify!”
The bot was too quick for him, diving to the side and rolling to a defensive crouch as his brothers did flips to give them different angles of attack as they jumped on him and attacked him with tiny katanas.
“Ah! Stupify! Wingardium Leviosa! Imobulous!” It took Lucius a few minutes to figure out how to fling them away and keep them at bay with shield charms, but then he was surprised to find himself having actual fun as he ran around trying to dodge all attacks while defending himself. Meanwhile, the girls remained safe in their impenetrable cage, taking copious notes on how well the bots performed and things that could be improved.
Twenty minutes later, Narcissa was humming softly and sipping on a cup of tea as she watched Harry and Draco rock their two newly fed sons to sleep, when suddenly, a deafening explosion rocked the entire Manor.
“What the?!?!” Draco blurted out in concern, surprised that the babies took this in stride, not even crying now that they were half asleep. Still holding their boys protectively, Harry, Draco, and Narcissa leapt to their feet, rushing to the lab, which was almost certainly the location of the explosion.
“I'll get you yet, you sneaky little rats!” Lucius roared as they threw open the door and piled in to find a scene of utter chaos. Lucius looked like he had gone utterly mad. His hair was in wild disarray, some of it slightly singed. He was wearing goggles that made his eyes look at least five times their normal size; his expensive and normally immaculate silk robes were torn and ragged. One sleeve was literally on fire. He whipped around to point his wand toward a corner of the room. “Diffindo!”
The bot he was aiming at dove to the ground to avoid the cutting hex while another one shot him in the back with his laser. Lucius spun around to shout: “Crucio! HA!” The bot screamed in agony and then swore at himself for not avoiding the curse.
A different bot roared out a battle cry as he rappelled from the ceiling to land on Lucius' head. Lucius grabbed him and held him in a firm grip as he cast: “Avada –”
“LUCIUS! What are you doing?!” Narcissa cried out in shock.
Lucius and all four of the bots stopped to look over at her rather guiltily. “What?” Lucius asked defensively. “It's them or me!” As if proving his point, the bot in his grip used his katana to slash Lucius' hand, prompting him to drop the bot with a loud: “Bugger!”
Harry couldn't help it. The sniggering he'd been trying hard to suppress burst forth in great guffaws. It amused him to no end to see his father-in-law – former Death Eater and utter bastard even on his best days – in an epic battle with what appeared to be toy versions of himself.
Draco was also having trouble holding back a few snickers.
“Oh like you could do any better!” Lucius challenged his son as he aimed at the two bots charging him head on: “Bombarda!” This explained the first explosion even though this one was much smaller and only intended to fling the bots backwards.
“Perhaps not,” Draco admitted with a nod of respect. “But I did just have a baby, so I'm not exactly in peak physical condition. What's your excuse, old man?”
Suddenly, one of the bots noticed that the equipment on the worktable included a Bunsen Burner and gas pipes – in short, everything he needed to make a small flamethrower. He rapidly did so, aiming it at Lucius with the pressure turned up as much as possible so that the flame really went the distance.
“Ah!” Lucius cried out in surprise as his shoulder started on fire. He now very much wanted to go to his tailor and pay him a large gratuity for spelling these robes to be flame resistant, which explained why Lucius hadn't noticed the fact that his sleeve was on fire. The charms on his clothing protected him from it.
The two bots Lucius had flung away teamed up to trip him with a rope, and the last bot pressed a button labeled emergency net trap. This resulted in Lucius struggling to get free from under a large net as all four bots converged on him with their lasers in one hand and their katanas in the other.
“Girls!” Draco chided firmly, his laughter fading as he realized that these bots really might have orders to keeping going until they murdered their target.
“Sorry daddy!” Nym apologized as she emerged from the glass cage. “We got caught up in taking notes on the battle.” She clapped her hands in a regal order to be obeyed. “Grampy-bots! Battle over!”
Lucius sighed in relief, finally managing a spell to vanish the net. He sat up and extinguished the fires on his robes. Lil threw her arms around Lucius' neck and gave him a big kiss on the cheek.
“The test was a rousing success! Our bots could be duplicated and sold as toys!”
“You can't be serious!” Lucius blurted out in concern. “They'd kill the children playing with them!”
“Only if ordered to,” Cis stated in utter seriousness, not quite understanding the objection. “Their base programming is to fight minor battles with each other as a way to entertain their owners.”
Harry was surprised to find himself agreeing with Lucius. “That's still not exactly child friendly.”
“Hmm... maybe we should use our Portashrinker in reverse to make the bots life sized...” Gem suggested with a finger pressed to her lips thoughtfully.
Lucius paled rather suddenly.
“Brilliant!” Cis exclaimed in agreement. “Then we could test if grampy finds it easier or harder to defend himself!”
Lucius sighed in profound defeat. “At least give me time to prepare. I'd have done better if I'd known what you had in store for me.”
Harry and Draco exchanged looks of surprise that Lucius didn't even try to protest. Lil and Gem hugged their grandfather and kissed either side of his cheek.
“We also have a bit of chemistry we'd like your help with,” Cis added, launching into a high speed explanation of the nuances. Lucius looked obviously lost but he nodded in agreement. Like their dads, he could never bring himself to say no to them.
***
This summer, the family hadn't gone on holiday because they felt their babies were too young and they wouldn't be able to relax and enjoy even their private island. This wasn't such a bad thing since it gave them a bit of time to enjoy their babymoon. About a week before Harry's birthday, Ron and Hermione came over with their two children, an eight year old girl and a five year old boy. The Malfoy-Potter family and their guests were having an excellent dinner when they received an unexpected surprised.
Narcissa gestured for everyone else to remain sitting while she Apparated to the gate to see who had triggered their wards. A minute later, she returned. With help from a few house elves, she'd Apparated a group of new guests into the dining room, promptly ordering chairs to be summoned and plates of food to be brought to the table.
“Dudley!” Harry blurted out in mild shock. While it was true that he had kept in touch with his cousin over the years and even considered them to be friends, it was rare for Dudley to drive all the way out to Wiltshire. Even more astonishing, his Aunt and Uncle were with Dudley, his wife Donna, and their three kids.
“Hiya Harry. Sorry to intrude without warning, but something happened,” Dudley began, rubbing the back of his neck and glancing at his parents – who were being surprisingly quiet and civil as they sat at the table and poked curiously at the food on their plates.
This made Harry frown. “Something you need my help with?”
“Sort of,” Dudley murmured, this time glancing at his wife.
“Daisy got her Hogwarts letter!” Donna blurted out with a proud grin as she ruffled their 11 year old daughter's hair. “We need to bring her shopping for her school supplies. Since I'm a squib and raised in America, I don't actually know where Diagon Alley is.”
“Wow!” Harry exclaimed in genuine surprise, grinning at Daisy. “Congratulations!” He shifted his attention to Dudley. “You mean you're actually letting her go?”
Dudley glanced at his parents again, but they seemed to have reached a state of reluctant acceptance. “I remember, well, you used to do so much weird stuff by accident. I reckon that it's better to send her to school so that she can learn to control it – else she'll just do that sort of stuff her entire life and not be able to stop it.”
“That's very true,” Draco stated with a nod of agreement. “Our girls once made a shark able to breathe air and walk upright on his tail.”
“Daisy makes things float when she's excited,” Donna replied.
“That's fairly common in young witches,” Narcissa informed her with a polite smile.
Petunia sighed and twitched, obviously bothered by that word but unable to deny it. Daisy slipped her hand into her grandfather's and tilted her head to the side curiously. Vernon gave her a smile of pure adoration.
“What's the matter, grandpa?”
“Nothing to worry about, my love. Just a headache, is all.”
Harry was nearly certain he was lying, but since Vernon was obviously straining from the effort of being civil, Harry didn't say anything.
Hermione took the pause in conversation as her cue to launch into an explanation of everything they'd need to know for their visit to Diagon Alley. She was explaining the finer points of Gringott's money exchange when Winky popped up next to the table between Harry and Draco.
“So sorry to interrupt, masters, but the babies are fussing. Winky has fed them and changed them and still they fuss.”
“They probably want attention,” Harry remarked with a smile as he took them both. “I'll hold them while you finish eating, Draco.”
“I can hold one and eat at the same time,” Draco insisted.
“Don't worry, I'm full anyway,” Harry assured him.
“Aww!” Daisy purred. “They're so cute!”
“They're a little more than a month old now,” Harry informed her with a smile.
“Can I hold one?” Doug – Dudley's six year old son – asked.
“Maybe once they calm down,” Harry replied since both boys were still fussing – although they were calmer than when Winky had Apparated them into the room.
Nine year old Donald Dursley stuck his tongue out at his younger brother. “They're not going to let a baby like you hold them!”
“Donnie!” Donna chided her son. “Be nice!”
Donnie rolled his eyes and focused on the interesting food on his plate. It was not only fancy but delicious. It smelled so good that he felt he'd be content to just sit here breathing it in forever.
“What did you name them again?” Dudley asked since he couldn't remember their names from the letter Harry'd sent off hand.
“Albus and Scorpius,” Harry replied with a smile.
“There's a long tradition of choosing constellations in our family,” Draco explained since Dudley looked confused. Harry almost told him not to bother – Dudley was always confused. “And Scorpius is one of my favorites. Of course, Draco is my very favorite.”
“Mine too,” Narcissa added with a soft smile.
“I was thinking of using Lyra if I ever have a daughter,” Lil interjected.
Gem laughed. “I hope I have twin boys so I can name them Pollux and Castor!”
“If you have girls, you could always name them Helen and Clytemnestra,” Nym pointed out.
“I like Archimedes for a boy and Tesla for a girl,” Cis informed them.
“Nikola Tesla was a boy!” Nym pointed out.
“So! That doesn't make his name masculine!” Cis argued, then she gasped in sudden remembrance. “That reminds me! Daddy, can you order us a dozen steel poles and several kilometers of wire? We want to construct a Tesla Coil in the field out back.”
“Wait,” Harry bade with a frown. “Isn't a Tesla Coil a lightning conductor?”
Gem sighed and rubbed her temples as if he had just given her a headache. “A Tesla Coil is an electrical resonant transformer circuit, don't you know anything? It's useful for so much more than just conducting lightning.”
Hermione snorted in amusement even as Harry gave his daughter a look . “So it is a lightning conductor.”
“But we're not planning to use it to hurl lightning!” Cis protested, sensing that her father was considering refusing.
“Much,” Gem added with a shrug.
“We think that we'll be able to study how electricity interacts with magic,” Nym explained.
“We've figured out how to use magic to ward electrical devices so that they work in high magic areas such as Hogwarts.”
“But that still has limited usage.”
“And we're hoping that we can make devices that run off of either magic or electricity without interference.”
“And we need the Coil to help us figure it out!”
“Where do we even buy steel poles and wire?” Draco wondered with a curious frown.
“Wait, you're saying that you've made electronics work in Hogwarts?” Hermione asked in fascination.
“How do you think we made our Grampy-bots work?” The girls asked in unison.
“Your what?” Ron blurted out with a laugh.
“Our Grampy-bots,” Lil repeated. “We'll show you.”
Lucius stood up abruptly. “If you'll please excuse me, I just remembered that I have something important I'm supposed to do.” He Apparated away before anyone could argue.
Harry burst out laughing. “I think I'd like one of those bots! I can pull it out of my pocket whenever Lucius starts annoying me!”
Giggling, Lil pulled her bot out of her pocket and woke it up. “Grampy-bot, using only your ninja skills, please go over to that tree and bring me back a leaf.”
“Sure thing Lil!” The bot acknowledged in a small voice that was remarkably similar to the man he was modeled after. The foot tall replica of Lucius promptly jumped off the table and ran stealthily toward the indicated tree.
As he did, the girls rattled off the finer points of robotics and AI to Hermione, who understood most of it but still looked a little lost. The bot finished long before they were done, no one able to find a good opening to change the subject. Unexpectedly, Daisy looked enraptured.
Suddenly, Kreacher popped into the room next to Hermione with a man in a set of professional black robes that reminded Harry of the main character from the movie 'The Matrix.' Hermione held up a hand in a silent order for the girls to be quiet a moment.
“Minister, there seems to be a bit of trouble and the Head of the Department for International Magical Cooperation desperately seeks a meeting with you.”
“Oh dear, sounds serious,” Hermione tutted as she stood up and gave her husband a kiss. “Sorry to run out on you, Ron. I'll try to be home in time to put the kids to bed and I'll send a Patronus if I'm running late.”
“That's alright, love. I'm quite looking forward to playing with these bots. I think they could be a big seller in our shop,” Ron appraised as he examined the bot in fascination. He tried tickling it, which offended it enough that it withdrew its katana and stabbed him in the offending finger. Ron gasped and stuck his bleeding finger in his mouth. “Or maybe not...”
After Hermione kissed Harry on the cheek and Disapparated, Harry quickly took hold of the conversation before his daughters could babble on some more. “So, Dudley, when would be a good time to go shopping?”
***
Two weeks before September, Draco really thought he ought to check in on his daughters before going to bed. They'd spent the entire day pretending not to electrocute everything in sight with their Tesla Coil – in the name of Science – and he didn't trust them to call it quits and go to bed any time before midnight. Plus, it was suspiciously quiet and had been for nearly twenty minutes. As any parent knew, that was never a good sign.
He looked around the yard, keeping an eye out for lightning, but didn't find them. So (mildly relieved that he wasn't caught by a stray bolt), he looked in their lab. It took all he had – by holding his breath and biting his lips together – to stop from laughing until his sides ached. There in the middle of the lab, sitting crossed legged on a plush cushion, was his father... having his hair done...
Gem and Lil were brushing and braiding their grandfather's hair, cooing and purring over how soft and pretty it was. Meanwhile, Nym and Cis were painting his nails with a shimmering golden polish. Next to them was a small, low to the ground table laden with tea, little sandwiches, and biscuits arranged as if it was High Tea with the muggle Queen. All of the fine china edged in real gold cups and plates were smaller than usual, looking overtly dainty and decidedly feminine.
Lucius pulled his right hand free from one of the girls for a moment to carefully pick up one of the tiny cups and sip from it with his fingers elegantly fanned out and his pinky perfectly extended. Draco lost it! He had to lean against the door frame to stop himself from falling to the ground as he roared with laughter.
“What?!” Lucius demanded crossly. “You know perfectly well that it's impossible to hold a cup this small with any sort of manly decorum.”
Draco laughed all the harder, because yes, it was the cup that made Lucius less manly, not! Staggering and clutching his stomach, Draco managed to walk away. With a put upon sigh, Lucius tried to leave the lab as well, but his granddaughters insisted that he stay until they finished testing out their magic enhancing polish on him. With another sigh, he capitulated.