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”Hey Kou?” Akaashi was getting his point haired boyfriend's hair.
“Yeah?” Bokuto replied with a purr , dazed with the petting he was getting.
“You've known Kuroo for a while right?”
“Mmmm.”
“What does he look like with his hair down?”
Suddenly Bokuto wasn't so dazed anymore.
”Hey Kenma!” Bokuto hissed at the setter while they were having a lunch break.
“I don't do relationship advice anymore.” Kenma sighed.
“No.” Akaashi joined in. “What does Kuroo look like with his hair down?”
Suddenly… Kenma was curious about something.
Daichi, Suga, Kenma, Bokuto, and Akaashi were huddled together at a training camp.
“So no one knows?” Suga whispered.
“And we don't know who to ask?” Bokuto nodded.
Daichi and Akaashi made eye contact.
“Her.” They said in unison.
“She would know.” Daichi added on.
“She would.” Akaashi agreed.
And the two split from the group with the other three tailing close behind.
The five soon found one of the targets.
Well… they found both. But everyone was staring. She was curled up in his lap and he was petting her and playing with the ends of her hair and it was just too cute.
“Just what are you doing?” Akaashi stepped forward.
“You spend the night and you think you can do whatever you want?” Daichi joined.
Suddenly four teams worth if heads were rotating between Kuroo and Yachi and Daichi and Akaashi.
They heard a little sigh and a “please stop” from Yachi.
Daichi smiled. “Oh we'll stop.”
Akaashi caught on fast. “On one condition.”
“And that would be?” Kuroo held her tighter.
“Yachi,” Daichi had a glint to his eye, “what does Kuroo look like with his hair down?”
Yachi suddenly looked at them like they had grown three heads and an extra limb.
“Down?”
Seriously, that head tilt could stop a raging mob.
“Yeah!” Bokuto jumped in. “We were curious.”
She smiled. “This is down! And it's so soft…” she turned and ran her hand through the hair.
“I'm gonna go vomit now.” Tsukishima left the group.
“For once, we agree.” Kageyama joined him.
Slowly, as the couple got more and more sickeningly sweet, more and more people vanished until only the original five remained.
“Kuroo. Don't hurt her.” Kenma sighed and left to get an apple juice and talk to that pinch server from Karasuno. He was cute. Kenma liked him.
“Brooooooo! Don't deny me- ow!” Bokuto rubbed his head after receiving a snack from Suga.
“Keijiiiiiii. Sugawara hit me!”
“You deserved that.”
“I will leave this in your capable hands. Daichi, Akaashi.” Suga smiled. “Come on, owl boy. We're going to get better acquainted.” He grabbed Bokuto and left.
“That…” Akaashi pointed at the pair, “scares me.”
Daichi was slightly pale. “Someone is going to die. And it might me me.” He agreed.
And then the two turned back to the love birds in the grass.
“Do we need to have the sex talk?” Daichi glared at Kuroo.
“No Daichi, sir, dad, sir!” Kuroo mock saluted.
“Yachi, do you need condoms or any help with-”
“I'm all good Akaashi, thank you!” Yachi yelled then hid her face in Kuroo’s chest.
The two nodded and left the two love birds.
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“I think it worked.” Yachi whispered.
“You should go into acting.” Kuroo smiled. “That was brilliant.”
“If they ever found out you look like a drowned cat when your hair's wet we'd never hear the end of it.” Yachi giggled.
All of a sudden, both of them were soaked and Tanaka was laughing behind them.
Everyone was looking at them again and, in the spirit of quick thinking, Yachi Hitoka burst into the biggest crocodile tears they had ever seen.
Everyone was so focused on getting them towels and reprimanding Tanaka that they didn't notice Kuroo sneaking off. When they finally did, he was back, his hair sticking up again and a towel around his neck and a spare set of clothes for her.
“I got these for you, Hitoka.” He soothed her. “Come on, love, stop crying. It'll be okay.” He picked her up and hugged her, whispering thanks into her neck before excusing them to get her dried off.
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“Sugawara?” Akaashi looked at the other setter.
“I saw.” Suga smiled. “That child… lying for her man. I'm both proud of her and ashamed of myself.”
“You do realize that you aren't actually her mom, right?” Akaashi checked.
“What?” Suga looked at him like he was crazy.
Akaashi backed away slowly, making sure to head towards Bokuto and Kenma and Daichi.
The sane ones.
Akaashi wanted new friends.