Work Text:
Rohan kept his calm, impassive expression before that annoyed -looking boy , who invaded his garden without any greeting or pleasantry , look ing at hi m with a hostile expression, breathing heavily, as if he had run all the way to that place. Rohan didn't say anything, waiting for the other to explain himself.
"You bastard!" Josuke yelled, pointing at Rohan's face in an accusatory manner.
Rohan let out a low sigh, taking a sip from the cup of tea he had on his hand. He had to control himself a little more than he wished not to throw what was left of that hot liquid on his unpleasant visitor's face.
"And you came here just to say that, Josuke Higashikata?" he asked, placing the cup on the table.
"You know why I'm here, you shithead!" Josuke approached one step from Rohan, still pointing at him, parting his legs a little, contorting his body in a dramatic pose. "You better deactivate this shit right now, or I'm going to make a reform in your stupid face!"
Rohan's patience was already running out. He had just finished his work, and only wanted to relax a little in his garden… Why did he have to put up with that foolishness ?
"What do you want?" he asked, sounding a little more daunting than before.
But that tone didn't faze Josuke, who was still staring at him in an accusatory manner, and seemed even more annoyed than Rohan himself, if such thing was possible.
"Your Stand!" answered Josuke, in a loud tone. "Erase whatever it is that you’ve written in me, you bastard!"
Rohan arched his brow. Now, alongside the annoyance, some confusion took place in his mind.
"What are you talking about?" he asked.
"You know what I'm talking about!" Josuke took his hands to his head, in apparent despair. "You used your Stand to take revenge on me, didn't you? Because I cheated when playing dice and your house caught fire…"
"Stop blabbering." Rohan stood up, slamming his hand on the table, impatient. "Just say it already, what's the matter?"
Josuke stared at him, as if pondering if that was part of an elaborated plan to torment him or not. He ended up letting out a loud, exhausted sigh.
"You used Heaven's Door to play with my mind, didn't you?" he asked, averting his gaze , sounding a little embarrassed. "Because if your intent was to torment me, then you already got what you wanted." He elevated his voice. "I can't stop thinking about you, alright? During classes, or at home… Sometimes I even think of you when I'm playing video games and I lose all of my lives." He looked at Rohan, frustrated. "That's what you wanted, right? So, you got it… Now can you make this stop already?
Rohan looked at Josuke for a long while, and now it was h e who was starting to believe that it was all an idiot prank from Josuke. A ridiculous, senseless prank that could have only been born from that insufferable boy's head.
"This is nonsense," said Rohan in a monotonous voice, sitting in his chair once again.
"What is, you bastard?"
Josuke seemed about to have another fit. Rohan looked at him with a serious expression.
"I didn't use my Stand on you," he said.
That phrase seemed to get Josuke by surprise. The hostile air on his face dissolved, giving place to a lost one.
"That's…" He started to say, but his voice failed him. "You're lying."
"Why would I?" retorted Rohan. "If I had really used Heaven's Door to take revenge on you, I would have made something much more original than… That." He frowned slightly. "Don't underestimate the creativity of an artist."
Josuke twisted his lips, looking away. Judging by his uncomfortable expression, a few of those possible punishments should have passed through his mind in that moment. Soon, however, he looked confused again.
"So… If it's not you…" He stroke his chin, in a thoughtful manner. "Could it be the work of an enemy Stand?"
Rohan stared at him in disbelief, asking himself if he was really serious about that.
"Of course not," he said. "No new Stand user appeared in Morioh since Yoshikage Kira's death. Besides, even if it was a Stand power, what would be the use of making you think about me?
Josuke seemed about to answer, but gave up, probably seeing reason in that explanation. Rohan shook his head, throwing a dispirited glance at his tea, which was probably cold by that point.
"You're over-complicating everything ." His words were accompanied by a brief gesture of his hand. "I'm a handsome man, and you are in the age of thinking about th e s e things. That's it, there's nothing deep or complex about the situation."
Rohan took a sip of his tea, making a displeased face by realizing that, yes, it was already cold. Josuke looked at him in silence, until Rohan turned his eyes to him again, waiting for him to say something, or simply go away and leave him in peace. But Josuke stayed there, without moving or saying any word, for long seconds, until a forced and nervous chuckle left his throat.
"Wha—?" he avoided looking at Rohan. "What are you talking about? This is a joke, isn't it? Ha, of course it is…" He laughed again, and it sounded even faker than before. "There's no way I would think about a man… in that way…"
He looked down, still laughing a mechanic, weak laugh. His face had a strong, red tone, and Rohan felt a little surprised to see him like that.
"Ah, Josuke..."
"I like girls," proceeded Josuke. "I… Someday I'll fall in love with a girl. You know, kinda like Koichi and Yukako? Ugh, no… She's too creepy." He laughed again. "Anyway, I'll meet a cute girl and fall in love. And we'll be happy, you know? Like, we'll be together, and have a family, and…"
Josuke's voice died in the middle of his blabber. Rohan looked at his face, and for a strange and awkward moment, he feared the boy would start to cry or something like that. Instead, it was more like Josuke had stopped working, as if the gears in his head had been disconnected, making his mind freeze.
Rohan stood up again, taking his cup from the table. His sudden movement seemed to bring Josuke back to earth.
"I think I should—" Started to say Josuke, pointing at the street.
"Josuke," said Rohan when passing by him. "Come with me."
Josuke looked at him, confused, probably wondering if he had heard that wrong. Noticing that, Rohan stopped at the door while opening it, looking at him.
"Enter," he said.
Josuke took a step back.
"You're not going to attack me and use me as a guinea pig for your manga , right?" he asked.
Rohan rolled his eyes, already regretting his decision. Why was he doing something like that for a nuisance like Josuke, anyway?
Maybe because no one had done it for himself.
"I only want to talk to you," he said, barely holding himself from adding an ‘idiot' at the end. " And I don't think this is the kind of talk we should have outside."
Josuke hesitated a little, seeming suspicious, but ended up approaching Rohan, following him inside.
Josuke sat on Rohan's couch, waiting while the mangaka prepared tea for them both. He felt a little uncomfortable in that house, but tried not to think about that. Rohan had changed since their first meeting, on the second floor of that place. He was still a smug bastard, of course, but now, even if he hated to admit it, Josuke trusted him — at least enough to believe he wasn't going to get stabbed on the back, or something.
Rohan came back a few minutes later, with two cups, placing one of them before Josuke. Then, he sat down, crossing his legs, looking at Josuke with attentive eyes.
"I don't know how to be subtle about this, so I'll just ask," he said. "Josuke, do you feel attracted to men?"
Josuke, who had the cup of tea halfway to his mouth, almost dropped it and all of its content with the shock. He stared at Rohan, feeling half surprised, half offended.
"What?" he asked. "What are you...?" He placed the cup on the table again, elevating his voice. "Are you trying to fight me, you bastard?"
"No, and I'd prefer that you don't break anything," answered Rohan.
Josuke hesitated a little, but then realized that Rohan was being sincere, so he abandoned his offensive posture. He lowered his eyes to his own hands, not knowing what to say.
"Why are you asking me this?" he asked.
"I only had this impression," said Rohan. "Am I wrong?"
Josuke stayed silent for a few seconds.
"You're not asking it so you can laugh at me, or blackmail me, or—"
"Don't be ridiculous."
Josuke almost laughed at Rohan's disgusted expression, but stopped himself. He thought for a few more seconds before proceeding:
"I don't know."
Rohan waited for Josuke to organize his thoughts, without rushing him. So he did, and the more he thought about it, the more he noticed some things that bothered him.
"I like girls… I think," said Josuke. "I always thought they were pretty and nice. The problem is…" He scratched his neck, feeling uncomfortable. "I don't really feel like I want to… Be with them? I mean, I like to talk to them and everything, but… That's it. I used to think that it was because I wanted to live a pure love, but, well… I'm almost seventeen now. I don't know, but I think any guy my age would at least be kinda curious to know how this stuff feels like.
He let out a low sigh. It was hard to talk about that, as if turning thoughts into words made his worries more real. He wanted to step back and say that he was just waiting for the ideal romance to happen, but the attentive look on Rohan's face encouraged him to continue.
"I don't know if I like men or not." Josuke almost frowned at his own words. "It's not like I have any interest in Okuyasu or Koichi. I mean, Koichi is kinda cute, and Okuyasu doesn't look bad either, but I never felt like… Kissing them, or something.
Josuke stopped talking. It would be so much easier if he could answer Rohan's question with "yes" or "no", but, even if he tried to find a real answer, he just couldn't.
"That's the problem," he added in a lower tone. "I don't know. I just don't know."
Rohan straightened his back on the couch, not seeming bothered by what he had just heard.
"I don't think it's a problem," he said. "You're still young, there's more than enough time to discover what you like and dislike. But…" Rohan hesitated a little, as if considering his next words. When he spoke again, his voice was lower than usual, and he didn't seem too comfortable with the situation. "If you want to talk about it with someone, you can come here. As long as you don't interrupt my work, of course," he added in a serious voice.
Josuke was a little surprised at that friendly proposal. Rohan wasn't the kind to think much about other people, and he didn't even try to hide it.
"And why would you do this for me?" asked Josuke, a little suspicious. "You want something in return, don't you?"
Rohan frowned.
"I don't know why you have such a negative image of me." He indicated Josuke's cup of tea with a brief gesture. "I even served you tea."
"Yeah…"
Josuke wasn't satisfied with that answer. Rohan seemed to notice that, and let out a small sigh.
"It's not that complicated," he said. "I realized I liked men when I was around fourteen, but I only got to accept it when I left home. I think it would have been much easier if there had been someone I could talk about this things at the time.
"Ah..."
Josuke lowered his eyes to the cup. Now, that was starting to make a little more sense in his mind. It was still a little strange to imagine that Rohan Kishibe, the man he had beaten up on the day they met, from whom he tried to steal money by cheating, and with whom he had fought so many times before, was worried about him. He wouldn't be able to say if that made him feel touched or plainly confused.
Rohan said he was unpredictable, but the mangaka himself wasn't much better.
"Are you going to say something, or just keep staring?" asked Rohan, sounding a little annoyed.
Only then Josuke realized that he was still looking at him. Before he could answer, however, Rohan proceeded:
"Anyway, I've made my proposal," he said, with a dismissive gesture of his hand. "If you don't have anything else you want to say, then you can go."
Josuke showed a wide smile. For some reason, Rohan's apparent worry for him healed his humor.
"Yes, sir!" he said, imitating a military pose.
Rohan raised his brow, shaking his head with an expression that said "I'm already regretting my choices" , which made Josuke laugh to himself.
A few days had passed, and that brief talk was already out of Rohan's mind when Josuke finally appeared. He had the usual high-spirited expression, and greeted the mangaka with a smile that seemed more friendly than usual. Rohan answered with a slight grimace.
"What do you want?" he asked.
Josuke didn't seem offended by the coldness of that greeting.
"What do you mean by ‘what do I want'?" he asked. "You're the one who said I could come whenever I wanted, right?" Josuke crossed his arms. "Or did you change your mind?"
Rohan stared at him for a few seconds.
"No," he said. "Come in."
He gave Josuke some space to enter and then closed the door. They went to the couch, as they did the last time, and after a few instants of silence, Rohan asked:
"Something wrong?"
Josuke denied with his head.
"No, nothing wrong," he said.
"Want to talk about something?"
Josuke hesitated a little before answering.
"That's not it, either..." he said.
That answer left Rohan a little confused, wondering what other reason Josuke would have to visit him if not that. Before he could question him about it, however, Josuke took a deep breath and spoke again:
"Can I stay here for a while?"
If Rohan was feeling confused before, now he didn't understand at all what was in Josuke's mind.
"Why?" he asked with a frown.
Once again, Josuke took a few instants to talk, as if trying to find the right words.
"I... I've been thinking a lot on the last few days. Since our last talk, to be honest," he said. "My mother is good at noticing when something is wrong, so… I didn't want to go home so early. I thought about finding an excuse to go out with someone from school today, but when I realized, I was already here.
He looked at Rohan, and his cheerful expression faltered a little.
"Only for today," he said. "For a few hours."
Rohan looked at him. Despite Josuke's effort to make it seem like everything was fine, it was clear that something was bothering him. Rohan didn't consider himself the most emphatic person in the world, but could understand how the other guy felt.
"Fine," he said.
Josuke seemed a little surprised to hear that.
"Really?" he asked.
Rohan agreed with a brief nod.
"I said that, as long as you don't interrupt my work, it's fine," he said, and then got a little more serious. "But if you do, I'm kicking you out."
That seemed to elevate Josuke's spirits a little. He spent the rest of the day there, reading some of Rohan's mangas while he worked. When it was almost getting dark, Josuke said his goodbyes, without any thanks or apologies, only that typical, friendly smile on his face.
That wasn't the last time it happened.
Sometimes, Josuke would appear there, without warning, and spend the day in that same way. Since the beginning, they didn't talk more than the necessary, but always stayed in the same room. Rohan didn't feel bothered by Josuke's presence in his studio, as long as he stayed quiet and didn't bother him.
In a few days, Josuke had already finished all the released volumes of Pink Dark Boy, and with that, there was a new subject for them to talk about. Josuke, despite his efforts to hide it in the beginning, had become interested in the story, and Rohan — despite considering it a little ironic — felt proud of it.
The subject of mangas soon led to Rohan's profession, and then, to the mangaka himself. He and Josuke, little by little, each passing day, began to talk more about themselves, their interests and other small, unimportant things with ease. Around two months later, it was almost hard to believe that once they could barely look at each other's face without starting a fight.
That day, they were both in Rohan's living room. Rohan had just finished his work and was reading a book on the couch, while Josuke watched television by his side. He didn't seem too concentrated, however, because he wouldn't stop moving his hands and legs, changing position every minute, sometimes spacing out for a long time, before noticing it, and pretending to pay attention to whatever he was supposed to be watching. Rohan wasn't too concentrated in his book either, since he followed each of Josuke's moves through the corner of his eyes.
It was becoming aggravating.
"If you want to say something, just say it already," said the mangaka, closing his book with a loud "thud".
Josuke stayed silent for a while, without questioning that phrase. At that point, Rohan knew him well enough to know when something was on his mind, and he was aware of it.
"Rohan, you went out with guys before, right?" asked Josuke.
Rohan looked at him, feeling a little curious.
"Yes," he said. "Why?"
Josuke thought for a while, studying his own knuckles with sudden interest. Rohan observed him: he always looked away, usually to his own hands, when he was feeling anxious. After a few instants, Josuke finally gathered the courage to ask what he wanted:
"Can you kiss me?"
Rohan arched his brow, believing that he had heard that wrong.
"Kiss you?" he repeated. "Why?"
"It's just something that I thought…" explained Josuke, without looking at Rohan. "An experiment, you know?"
"Experiment?" Rohan crossed his arms, not liking how that sounded.
"Yeah, I think it's more like a test," answered Josuke. "If you kiss me and I hate it, it should mean that I don't like men."
"Or that you don't like me in particular," added Rohan.
"I don't know…" answered Josuke. "If I was supposed to like a guy, I think you would be the first on the list."
"Oh..." The mangaka showed a small, amused smile. "Should I feel honored?"
Josuke opened a wide smile. And, despite not showing it on his face, Rohan had learned to like that expression. In fact, there was something in the contrast between Josuke's size and his sweet personality that he just couldn't help but adore. But he never thought too much about it, because he knew it would only bring him problems.
"So...?" asked Josuke, seeming anxious.
Rohan didn't think that was a good idea, but, for some reason, ended up ignoring his good sense.
"If it's just a kiss, then there shouldn't be any problem," he said.
Josuke's expression brightened. Rohan couldn't help but find it a little amusing. "You look too happy for a simple test" , he thought.
But he didn't question Josuke. Instead, he took the book from his lap and placed it on the table. Josuke followed his movements with the eyes, as if anticipating each of them. Rohan took his time on purpose, amused by Josuke's restless expression.
He sat next to Josuke, close enough so their legs would touch. He leaned a little in his direction, keeping his eyes on Josuke’s all the time. Didn't do anything other than that, and soon Josuke seemed to realize that Rohan was waiting for a reaction on his part. Seeming a little embarrassed, he approached his face from Rohan's, pressing his eyelids close. Rohan showed a slight smile a little before their lips met, and then also closed his eyes.
Josuke spent some time without moving, just with his lips on Rohan's, and then risked advancing a little more, opening them. If he hadn't already said that he hadn't ever kissed anyone before, Rohan would have noticed it at that moment. He was a little clumsy, and despite knowing what he should do, he still didn't know so well how to do it. But Rohan wasn't displeased by that. He took his hand to the side of Josuke's neck, almost touching his nape, taking some control of that situation, showing Josuke what he knew, soon realizing that the other was a fast learner.
Josuke took his hand to Rohan's face, caressing it softly with his fingers. Even more than the kiss, Rohan felt like that soft touch was burning his skin, bringing to the surface feelings he'd rather keep buried within.
That wasn't good... He had to stop.
Rohan interrupted that kiss, managing to keep his composure while getting a little farther from Josuke, straightening his back as an excuse. There were trace s of green lipstick on Josuke's lips, and that made Rohan realize that his own face should be a complete mess. He felt strangely satisfied with that thought, and took his hand to Josuke's face, trying to clean a little of those smudges.
This isn't good...
"So?" he asked, trying to erase those thoughts from his mind.
Josuke still seemed a little spaced-out, but came back with that question.
"It was good," he said.
He had his eyes on Rohan's lips. Maybe the lipstick was more smudged than he initially thought…
"I think I really like… m en," said Josuke in a low tone.
Rohan agreed with a nod. Josuke forced a smile.
"Well, something less for me to keep worrying about, now." he completed.
"Sounds good."
"Yeah…"
Josuke lowered his eyes, seeming a little uncertain.
"Can I still come here?" he asked, without looking at Rohan.
No... That's a terrible idea.
"Sure," answered Rohan, "whenever you want. As long as you don't interrupt my work, or else…"
"You'll kick me out." Josuke completed with a small laugh. "Yeah, sure."
There was something different about Josuke's smile when they said their goodbyes that day, or at least it made Rohan feel different.
"What the hell am I doing?" , Rohan asked himself after closing the door.
Why was he starting to like someone now, of all times?
Why someone four years younger?
Why Josuke?
That wasn't good.
Rohan took a little longer than usual to answer the door when Josuke rang the doorbell that day. Josuke was starting to wonder if the mangaka had gone out, when the door opene d . Josuke almost got scared when he saw Rohan's face: he seemed about to murder someone and fall dead, all at the same time.
"What happened?" he asked, worried. The first thing on his mind was that a Stand user had appeared suddenly and attacked him by surprise.
But Rohan only sighed, exhausted, gesturing for Josuke to get inside.
"Two authors are on hiatus this week, so I ended up with almost twice the usual number of pages," he explained, sounding annoyed.
Josuke looked at Rohan, and it took him a few seconds to realize that he was talking about his work. He felt relieved to know that it wasn't something as bad as he had imagined, but when he paid attention to the dark circles around Rohan's eyes, and his mess y clothes and hair, he started to worry again.
"But are you alright?" he asked. "I mean, you don't look so good."
"Just a few days without sleeping," answered Rohan, dismissing the question with a brief wave of his hand. "Nothing that didn’t happen before."
Josuke arched his brow, hoping that those words were just a joke, but being a hundred percent sure that they weren't.
"What?" He brought his hand to his head, covering his eyes, imagining briefly how Rohan would live his life in such situation. A ccording to what he knew about the mangaka, i t was probably worse than that . "Wait... Are you at least eating, bathing… You know, these things people do to survive ?"
"I don't think I took a bath in the last three days or so," answered Rohan in a casual, tired tone. "But I should have eaten something at some point. I think."
"You think...?"
Josuke stared at Rohan. That man was… Unbelievable.
"You should stop a little," said Josuke in a serious tone.
"No," said Rohan. "I'm almost finishing. If I stop now, it'll take forever to get into it again."
"How much is ‘almost’?”
"A little less than two pages."
Josuke thought a little and ended up yielding. Considering the abnormal speed in which Rohan worked, that shouldn't take too long.
"So, while you finish it, I'll try to make something for you to eat," he said. "And then, you'll take a bath and go to sleep."
Rohan grumbled, not seeming that happy to receive orders from someone younger, but Josuke didn't back off. Rohan's working habits weren't too healthy as they were, and Josuke wasn't willing to let them get even worse.
"I'll drag you to the bathroom if I need to," he said.
"Fine, fine…" answered Rohan, grumpy, going upstairs with heavy, stubborn steps.
Josuke followed him with his eyes. Part of him was a little annoyed by Rohan's self-neglect, other, was worried about the countless times he probably did the same thing with no one around to make him stop and take care of himself. And other, still, was amused at that unexpected, childish behavior of seconds before.
Josuke went to the kitchen. His culinary gifts were questionable, at best, but Rohan wasn't in place to complain in that situation. He did the best he could with what he found in the fridge, and when he finished, he heard the sound of the shower on the upper floor. Knowing that now he could only wait, he sat on the couch, turning the television on to pass the time. Rohan came down a few minutes later, wearing pajamas and with his hair still wet. Josuke went to him, using the towel he still had around his shoulders to dry his hair a little better.
"There's food on the table," he said.
Rohan answered with a grumble. Josuke amused himself thinking about how grumpy he became when he was sleepy, and then guided him to the table. Rohan ate in silence. Maybe he wasn't as picky as he seemed, or maybe the sleepiness numbed his palate a little, but what mattered to Josuke was knowing that now there wouldn't be a zombie walking around the house anymore.
When he finished, Rohan got up from the chair, but instead of going up the stairs, to his room, he sat on the couch, beside Josuke.
"Rohan?" Josuke looked at him. "Are you sure you don't want to go sleep?"
"It's not like a few days without sleeping are going to bring me down," retorted Rohan.
"Well, sure… As you wish," answered Josuke, shrugging, looking around, searching for the remote control. "By the way, Rohan—"
Before he could ask if he had seen the object, Josuke felt something leaning against his arm. He looked to the side and saw Rohan there, the head resting against his shoulder, his eyes closed, already asleep. He laughed to himself, getting up carefully, laying Rohan on the couch.
"A few days without sleeping aren't going to bring me down..." he repeated in a low, mocking tone, while placing Rohan's legs on the assent. "Of course, Mr. mangaka… I can see that."
He was about to take a cushion to place under Rohan's head, but after thinking for a while, he changed his mind. Gently, he lifted Rohan's head, sitting on the couch, placing it on his lap. After doing that, he felt a little embarrassed with the situation, but it was already too late to regret it. Besides, he had caused it himself.
"I should've just gone home…" he muttered to himself.
But Josuke knew that he wouldn't have done it anyway.
He looked at Rohan's asleep face. It was a little strange to see him without any makeup, or his usual hairband. It made him look like another person. Younger. Different.
How many people had seen him the way Josuke saw earlier, after giving his all to the work he loved so much?
How many people knew about that grumpy, stubborn way he acted when he was tired?
And how many people had seen the proud Rohan Kishibe asleep on their lap?
"Not many", he thought.
He liked to think about that. It was like he had something from Rohan only to himself. Something unique.
"Hey, Rohan…"
There wasn't an answer, of course. Rohan was sleeping deeply. Josuke smiled, placing his hand on Rohan's head, gently caressing his hair.
"I love you."
Saying that seemed to change something inside of him. Not change, but make it more real. Confirm.
There had been some time since Josuke first became aware of his feelings for Rohan. To be honest, he began to suspect a little after that first talk they had, when all the pieces started to get into place. But, after each day he spent beside the mangaka, those feelings grew into something bigger. Easier to understand. Harder to ignore.
"I love you," he repeated in a low tone.
There was no answer, and he wasn't waiting for one. He just wanted to say that, even if each word hurt so much.
He closed his eyes, throwing his head back , resting it on the couch. He opened his eyes again, staring at the ceiling.
"What the hell am I doing?" he asked himself in silence.
Rohan woke up with a stiff neck. He felt a little disoriented for a few instants, not knowing where he was, or what day it was. Before he could make sense of the situation, the sound of a breathing that wasn't his own made him jump a little. The living room was dark, but as soon as he lifted his head, he was able to recognize the form of a sleeping Josuke close to him.
The first moment was one of complete confusion, but, soon after, the vague memories of hours before came to his mind. Rohan let a small curse leave his lips: the last thing he wanted was Josuke seeing his pathetic side, and that was exactly what had happened.
"Josuke," he called. "Josuke," repeated, shaking his arm a little.
Josuke opened his eyes.
"What…?" he said, looking around. "Where…?"
"You're in my house," said Rohan. "It seems I ended up sleeping on you while we were watching television." He stood up, massaging his sore neck. "What time is it?"
Rohan looked at the clock on the shelf, realizing that was already past one in the morning.
"Ah, crap!" he heard Josuke's voice beside him. "My mom must be worried sick…"
Josuke started to search for his bag. Rohan followed him with his eyes, thinking.
"Josuke, it's late," he said. "Call your mother, tell her you'll be spending the night here."
Josuke looked at him, a little surprised.
"It's not a problem?" he asked.
Rohan shook his head.
"No," he said. "It's my fault that this happened. If you want, I can explain to her that you were helping me."
"Ah, thanks."
Josuke did as he said, calling his home. As he thought, Tomoko was angry at first, but calmed down a little when Rohan talked to her. He was good with his words, and minutes later he hung up.
"She asked for you to warn her beforehand next time," said Rohan.
"Ah, sure. Thanks."
"We better go upstairs," proceeded Rohan. "I'll lay down a futon for you."
They went upstairs, Rohan leading, walking to his own bedroom. He had a serious expression, but each step gave him a growing feeling of both panic and excitement. It annoyed him: he was twenty years old, his stupid "teenage crush" phase should be over a long time ago. He repeated it to himself, but everything inside him seemed to disagree. He was anxious for something he knew that wouldn't happen… He anticipated every action, every touch that wasn't coming.
Maybe he was even more exhausted than he imagined.
Josuke was feeling tired, but couldn't sleep. Every time he started to drift away to dreamland, the reminder that he was in Rohan's room made his heart jump, and just like that, he was wide awake again.
He had his back to Rohan's bed. He wouldn't dare look over his shoulder, knowing that would only worsen his situation. He repeated to himself that there was nothing strange about two guys sleeping in the same room — he and Okayuasu did that same thing countless times before —, but soon his rational thoughts were replaced by the fact that Rohan was there, so close to him. More than once, a voice whispered in his mind that, if he happened to approach Rohan and kiss his lips a second time, he would never know. Thinking about it made him feel angry and disgusted with himself.
Josuke let out a low sigh, turning his body on the futon, sinking his head into the pillow.
"Josuke?" he heard Rohan's low voice. "Are you still awake?"
Josuke turned his face to the bed, seeing that Rohan had his eyes open, observing him.
"Ah, did I wake you up?" he asked.
"No, I didn't fall asleep yet ."
Josuke was a little surprised to hear that.
"Really?" he asked. "I thought you were tired."
"Yes, but…" Rohan made a brief pause, apparently choosing his words. "I think I'm just thinking too much about unnecessary things."
"Oh…" It was Josuke's turn to make a pause. "Yeah… Me too."
Silence filled the room as the meaning of their words started to sink in. Josuke felt his stomach turn with anxiety.
"Rohan, I…"
"Josuke." Rohan interrupted him, without elevating his tone. "Come to my bed."
Josuke widened his eyes, sure that he had heard it wrong.
"What?"
Rohan didn't repeat his words. Josuke needed a few seconds to organize his thoughts, make sure he hadn't imagined those words. He breathed deeply a few times, and then, gathering his courage, he got up, approaching Rohan's bed. At first, he only sat on the mattress' border, but the lack of protests or surprise from Rohan's part confirmed that he really was expecting it. Feeling his hands getting cold and the throat dry, he dragged his body a little closer , laying beside Rohan, facing him. He didn't know what he should do next, but Rohan was the one to act first, taking his hand to Josuke's face. He touched his hair, that now fell on Josuke's face, since his iconic hair do was undone. A brief smile passed through the mangaka's face, as if the sight amused him.
"It's a mess, isn't it?" asked Josuke, with a nervous smile.
"It is."
But Rohan didn't move his hand away. Josuke looked at him, and their eyes met. It was as if something had been said in silence, because in the next moment, both acted, approaching their faces until their lips were touching.
It didn't feel awkward like the first one, but neither was as passionate. It was soft, gentle, unexpectedly sweet. Instead of making Josuke yearn for more, it made him feel at peace, as if all of his anxiety had been washed away. He took his hand to the nape of Rohan's neck and felt the mangaka's arms around him. When they broke the kiss, Josuke placed smaller ones on Rohan's cheek and close to his chin. Rohan let out a low laugh and gave him a brief kiss on his shoulder, then rested his forehead on it.
"I'm tired…" he groaned, sounding a bit annoyed.
Josuke let out a small laugh, caressing Rohan's hair with his hand.
"Then sleep."
Rohan stared at him for a few seconds, as if considering his options. Then, with a resigned sigh, he lay down on the bed again, leaning his head on Josuke's chest.
"We'll have to talk about this tomorrow, I guess…" he said, sounding sleepy.
"I guess," answered Josuke.
"You better be here when I wake up."
"I'm not going anywhere."
Rohan soon stopped answering, and the low sounding of his even breaths made clear that he was already sleeping. Josuke smiled fondly, looking at him for a while. And then, with the feeling of warmness and his heart finally at ease, he too fell asleep.
"You should have woke n me up!" said Josuke in despair, trying to fix his hair as fast as he could – which wasn't much.
"I was sleep-deprived," answered Rohan, with a small shrug. "And I don't have to worry about school anymore."
"Well, but I do!"
Rohan watched as Josuke finished his iconic hairdo, an amused smile on his face.
"I thought you were a delinquent…" he said.
"Very funny," retorted Josuke.
They went downstairs, Josuke searching for his bag and shoes. When he was finally ready to go, he faced Rohan with a cheerful expression.
"I'll see you later, then," he said.
And, before Rohan could say anything, Josuke gave him a brief kiss on the lips. He then left the house, laughing to himself, as if he had done something amazing. Rohan just looked at him and waved back when Josuke turned to him a last time.
He wasn't expecting to fall in love, much less with someone like Josuke Higashikata.
But it sure was an amazing feeling.