Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Did you know this whole time?”

            Oliver flinches at the sound of Felicity’s voice behind him in the silence. She sounded broken, like she had given up and it broke Oliver’s heart.

            “Not in the beginning. When I first brought you in I had no idea. But I decided to do some more digging, just because you had never told me about him so I figured I could find something. It was about two months after you joined the team that I found some old photos and I knew.” He answered, without turning around to face her.

            “Oliver. Oliver look at me. Look at me!” She exclaimed. He turned slowly; afraid of what emotions he might see painting her face. She didn’t deserve this; she didn’t deserve any of this. To find out her father was a mad man and to find out the one person she trusted implicitly, had a hand in his death. When his eyes met hers he couldn’t help the sharp intake of breath at their puffy, red appearance.

            “Felicity I’m sorry.”

            “Sorry for what? Killing my father? Or lying to me about it?”

            “I never lied to you.”

            “You lied by omission, Oliver. And that’s just as bad if not worse.”

            “I didn’t want to risk it.”

            “Risk what?”

            “Losing you, Felicity. I knew that if I told you, you might not forgive me. I wouldn’t be able to live a world where you hate me.”

            “That wasn’t your decision to make. I had a right to know, and I would have much rather found out from you than from Slade while he held a gun to my head.”

            “I know, and I’m sorry.” He breathed out, focusing on her shoulder instead of looking her in the eyes. Suddenly she was standing in front of him and taking his face in her small hands.

            “I could never hate you. Never.” She assured softly. “But-.”

            “Felicity.”

            “Let me finish.” He cast his eyes downward with a resounding sigh. “I need you to give me some time.”

            “How much?”

            “I don’t know. I just need time away from here to figure everything out, to figure out where we go from here.” She dropped her hands from his face and gathered a few things from her desk as he stood frozen, his eyes following her every movement.

            “Hey, I’ll come back.” She whispered.

            “Promise me.” He said hopefully. His only answer was a small smile gracing her lips before she turned her back on him and walked out of the foundry.

Chapter Text

Felicity swung her front door open with a loud sigh and a roll of her eyes.

            “Oliver, when I said I needed time I didn’t mean wait two days and then come see me.”

            “I know, I know, I just thought you deserved some answers.” He answered softly. Felicity sighed again, but moved away to motion Oliver inside. He smiled gratefully at her as he moved to take a seat on her couch.

            “I want to apologize again.”

            “Oliver seriously, stop.”

            “Felicity I killed your father!” He exploded suddenly causing Felicity to let out a little surprised squeak and jump up from her seat.

FLASHBACK

            “You cut his hand off?” Oliver whispered incredulously.

            “I’m sorry did I go too easy on him, kid?” Slade asked with a humorless laugh.

            “No I just think-.”

            “You’re right, we should kill him.” Slade said with a nod as he handed Oliver a gun.

            “Slade I really think we should just-.”

            “If we let him go there’s no telling what he’ll do. He might only have one hand but he still has people working under him, we have to take care of the problem at the source. So kill him.” Slade said, motioning to where Ivo was kneeling slouched against the wall of the Amazo. Oliver took the gun from Slade’s hand and slowly walked to stand in front of Ivo’s prone form.

            “Please don’t kill me. My wife, she needs help, she needs this, my daughter is suffering because I can’t help my wife.”

            “Maybe you should have thought of that before you went ahead a killed a few dozen people!” Slade barked from across the room. Oliver slowly lifted his hand with the gun to press the cold barrel against Ivo’s temple.

            “Please, please my daughter, she can’t lose both her parents, don’t take away both of her parents please. I’m begging you, just show some mercy please.” He begged.

            “I’m sorry.” Oliver said softly, and then he pulled the trigger.

END OF FLASHBACK

            Felicity was silent as Oliver finished telling her what happened.

            “Say something, please.” He pleaded softly.

            “What am I supposed to say, Oliver? Please tell me what I should say when the person who killed my father is sitting in my living room.”

            “I want you to say that we’ll be ok.”

            “I don’t know if I can do that.”

            “Felicity.”

            “Right now. Oliver you need to give me time, real time, not just two days. I need to think, I need to decide what to do without you crowding me and pushing me to forgive you.” Oliver opened his mouth to reply but Felicity quickly silenced him, “Don’t you dare apologize again Oliver!” She exclaimed, her voice breaking on his name as tears clouded her vision.

            “I want you to leave.”

            “Ok.” Oliver slowly stood from the couch and glanced at her once before he walked toward the door, “Lock this as soon as I go.”

            “I always do. And Oliver?”

            “Yes?” He asked hopefully.

            “Don’t you dare even think of suiting up and sitting on my fire escape tonight.”

            Oliver nodded slowly before disappearing out the door.

…………………………………………………………………

            Oliver waited until well past the time he knew Felicity usually fell asleep, before he scaled the fire escape quickly and took his position in the corner where she couldn’t see him were she to look out the window. He prided himself on keeping his promises to her, but he wouldn’t allow her safety to be in jeopardy just because she was angry with him. He would protect her, whether she wanted it or not.

Chapter Text

“What if she doesn’t come back?” Oliver mused as he sat behind his desk and looked out at the sun setting.

            “Hmmm?”

            “Felicity. What if she decides she doesn’t want to come back?”

            “Oliver she’ll come back.”

            “How do you know that?”

            “Because I’ve spoken to her about it.”

            “You talked to her?”

            “Yes. Almost every night since she left.”

            “How is she?”

            “She’s hurting, but she’s better than she was in the beginning.”

            “She’s still mad at me?”

            “I don’t think she was ever really mad at you. She’s just confused. She trusts you more than anyone, and I think it’s just hard for her because she feels like she needs to be upset since he was her father and you killed him, but at the same time she never really knew him.”

            “Is there any way I can make it better?” Oliver asked, sounding more vulnerable than John had ever heard before.

            “I wish I had an answer for you, man I really do. Just don’t rush her, don’t suffocate her.” John said with a shrug as he moved to leave the office.

            “Hey Dig?”

            “Yeah?”

            “I think I’m in love with her.”

            “Yeah I know.” John laughed. “But I don’t think she does, you should tell her when she gets back. But just so you know, if you tell her you love her, and then take it back, she’s never going to trust anyone again so you need to be sure before you let her fall.”

            “I’m sure.”

            “Well alright then. Good luck.”