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Phil’s bored.
Phil’s content and having a good time and perhaps a little tipsy, but bored.
He nudges Dan’s foot from underneath the table. He watches him from across the table, body tilted towards Jack, currently giving a funny anecdote. He watches how nothing in Dan’s expression changes as he nudges his foot back.
Phil patiently waits for the story to finish--some story about a mishap while filming his next short that’s definitely funny, but spectacularly insignificant. When the story finally ends with an amusing punchline and a round of laughter, Phil smiles and goes to offer a witty comment, but only to get cut off by--of course--the beginning of another anecdote from Christa.
Christy?
Christa.
Phil takes a sip from his drink, swallowing down what he was going to say along with it.
He nudges Dan’s foot again. This time, Dan looks at him, and offers a slight raise of his eyebrow. Phil responds with the slightest shrug.
It’s not like these parties aren’t fun, per se. It’s always nice to see Hazel, Jack, Dean, and the whole gang on one of their bi-annual participation in their little parties. It’s just...a lot. A lot of personality. A lot of opinions about things both of them love and enjoy. But it’s coming to that point where it’s starting to shift from a nice common interest in film and into the category Dan likes to call the “pseudo film school support group”, Phil’s not sure if he can suppress an eye roll if another person goes on a rant on why La La Land is so overrated, or why Marvel’s so obviously past their prime with their genre-bending attempts.
Bit still, he listens. And nods, and laughs. He’s been to their parties enough to know he’s best suited in the background, listens to debates, watches Dan engage.
When someone--Bertie, he thinks--brings up a certain movie, however, his ears perk up.
“Yes, I know it’s been months, but I finally got around to seeing mother!”, he says during a quiet lull.
Phil opens his mouth to reply--he’d been wanting to talk about that movie with someone since he ranted to Dan about it--when the entire table erupts in excited murmur.
“I don’t remember the last time I legitimately was so engrossed in a film before,” Jack says. The rest of the table affirms.
Phil lets himself sigh. Dan catches his eye, and he gives Phil an apologetic smile. He knows how he feels about mother!, and how he probably won’t get a chance to share an ounce of his own opinion. The party is already deep into their praise for the filmmaking, depth, intellectual rigour in a friendly and sincere way, but an air of entitlement laces each word that makes Phil cringe the tiniest bit.
Truth be told, he didn’t like this movie at all. He’d heard all the controversy, all the speculation, and he walked out underwhelmed.
“Yeah, Phil and I saw it right after it came out, actually,” he hears Dan say. “I really liked it, actually, but...” He trails off.
Hazel’s eyes widen. “Did you not like it, Phil?” The rest of the table look at him in intrigue.
Phil smiles apologetically, shooting a mental glare at Dan. He shifts slightly in his seat, and focuses on keeping his tone light and conversational. “Yeah, it didn’t really work for me.” He smiles an easy grin, bracing himself for what was to come.
“What? Why not?” Jack responds, a little too loudly. He was probably on a fourth beer, and he’s never been a subtle with his condescending nature when sober.
“Was it too weird for you?” Sammy offers. He cocks his head in such a way that irritated Phil that he has to stop himself from visibly rolling his eyes.
No, it wasn't too weird. News flash, Sammy, you aren't the only one who watches art house.
“No, it’s not that. It was just pretty transparent and boring, in my opinion.” He stays breezy. He can feel Dan watching him.
“No, well, I don’t think it was transparent at all. It’s why it works so well as an allegory on the creation story.” Hazel responds.
Sammy speaks again. “Yeah, but like obviously that’s okay if you don’t like it, mate. Darren Aronofsky said he didn’t intend it for mass audiences."
Phil’s eyes shoot up at that, the last string of patience snapping inside him. Despite the blatant judgement and an air of pretension Phil’s been tolerating the whole night, he inhales, willing himself to stay accommodating, neutral, friendly.
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Dan frowning at him. What are you doing? Go on. Explain yourself.
Phil breathes again, he takes another sip of his drink, and clears his throat.
“No, it’s not that. I know it’s an allegory, probably a horatian piece of satire about the fall of man, and how it portrays the postlapsarian world of dystopia. Earth and God, from the Pentateuch of the Old Testament, and the soteriology and Original Sin. It’s just a bit too on-the-nose, you know? Like, the camera work was obviously really impressive and Aronofsky’s approach to typology is really unique, but behind all that, it’s like a fever dream kind of created to be praised. The biblical allusions fall flat if the payoff doesn't deliver, and I don't think it did. It kind of tries to juggle a lesson in morals with pessimistic monotheism, which also kind of irked me.” He wrinkles his nose. “But Jennifer Lawrence is great. Obviously.” He finishes.
The entire table is silent, looking incredulously at him as if he flashed them or something. Sammy’s mouth is literally hanging open. Hazel tilts her head, probably a sign of approval Phil never asked for, and Jack downs the rest of his beer. Finally, his eyes land on Dan, who is simply smiling in satisfaction at him, a devilish hint of joyous pride.
Phil feels warmth in his cheeks at the following silence, so he speaks again. “So, yeah I guess why I didn’t like it.”
Hazel’s the one to speak up, easily his favourite of the group. “That’s cool. Uh, sorry, if we came off a little--”
“No, no, not at all,” Phil cuts her off with a smile, waving a hand in dismissal. “All good. Just remember us ‘general audiences’ can actually read a thing or two sometimes.”
Another beat of silence.
“Well, this has been fun,” Dan pipes up, scraping back his chair.
Phil’s shoulders slump, relief coursing through his insides as he immediately takes the cue to escape. “Yeah, we’re probably gonna take off.”
“Yeah, yeah, sure,” Jack finally says, clearing his throat and getting up with them. “Here, take this before you leave, we have some leftovers...”
--
As they walk out the door and into the night air, the music coming from the house growing fainter with each step, Phil elbows him in the rib. “You should not have done that.”
“Done what?” Dan replies, widening his eyes in exaggerated innocence.
Phil rolls his eyes. “You know I don’t like being put in situations like that.”
The other man snickers. “Oh, come on. You were bored as hell and you know it. If I had to watch their little circle jerk for another hour, I would’ve lost it. Excuse me for wanting to show you off.” Phil sees a twinkle in his eye, illuminated by the darkness.
“Shut up.”