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“Why do the stars follow us, mommy?”
A five-year-old Jeon Jeongguk asks his mother one night as they are driving home from another one of their weekly roadtrip to the mountains.
“What do you mean?” His mother asks back.
“I mean, they never move!” Jeongguk turns toward his mother with a frown, small finger pointing up to the night sky, “Even when you’re driving so fast, they still keep up!”
His mother giggles quietly. She slowly pulls the car to a stop by the side of the empty road.
“See, mommy! When we stop, the stars stop too!”
“Let me tell you a secret, Jeonggukkie.” His mother smiles warmly as she speaks, “The stars that we see are actually parts of a gigantic map that’s written all across the night sky.”
“A map?” Jeongguk’s round eyes widen with curiosity, “Like the one that you look at when we go on fun trips?”
“Yes, baby, just like those ones. Except this one is much, much bigger.” She explains as she makes to get out of the car. Picking Jeongguk up and stepping into the cool, autumn night, she continues, “Whenever you feel lost, the stars will always be there to help you find your way.”
“But mommy, I don’t understand the map,” Jeongguk pouts his lips as his mother settles him onto the hood of the car. “How will I know which way to go?”
She sits herself down by his side, carefully wrapping a warm blanket around their bodies and snuggling close, “Do you see that line that cuts in the middle between the Earth and the sky? The one far, far away?” She asks, pointing a finger down the length of the dusty road in front of them.
Jeongguk squints his eyes and gazes far into the darkness of the night. He quickly identifies it; the single, horizontal line that separates the pitch-black ground from the cloudless azure of the sky, “I see it, I see it!” He reports enthusiastically.
“That line is called the horizon. It is where the sun hides at night, and where it reappears in the morning.” She says with a grin. “Now look above it.”
Jeongguk follows without question, lifting his eyes up in an instant.
“Do you see that star, Jeonggukkie? The brightest one in the night sky?” She waits until Jeongguk nods to continue, “That’s planet Venus.”
“Venus….” Jeongguk mumbles, trying the new word on his lips.
“Yes, Venus. Wherever you are in this world, Venus will always be right there, just above the horizon. The brightest star in the night sky, telling you which way to go.”
Jeongguk scrunches his eyebrows for a moment, then looks up at his mother in bewilderment, “If I follow Venus, will I find my way home, mommy?”
“Yes, baby.” His mother answers as she leans down to plant a soft kiss into his dark brown hair, “Venus will always guide you home.”
☆
Jeongguk’s mother passed away a few years after that, a terrible disease that had been eating her up for years finally taking its toll on her body. Since then, Jeongguk never looked at the stars ever again. They reminded him too much of his mother, reminded him of the way that her charming, brown eyes lit up at the sight of the twinkling stars and the way that she talked about the constellations like they were her oldest friends.
He remembers them all by heart.
How Queen Cassiopeia was forced to live the rest of her life in upside-down, a petty punishment that Poseidon casted upon her for simply being too pretentious for her own good. How her daughter, Andromeda, fell in love with the ancient-Greek hero, Perseus, after he rescued her from a sea monster one day. How Pegasus, the mighty winged-horse, stands tall and proud as one of the largest constellations in the night sky.
Jeongguk cherished these stories more than anything else in the world.
Everytime his mother drove them up to the mountains for one of their stargazing trips, Jeongguk would bring along his ‘Astronomer’s Log’, a small diary that he kept for sketching the night sky and for writing down all the myths and tales that his mother shared, no matter how many times he’s heard them before. Jeongguk wanted to learn about every, single star in the night sky. There’s an infinity and half of them up there, and he can’t help but wonder how professional astronomers manage to keep track of them all. Jeongguk used to spend his days dreaming about the possibility of discovering a new star someday, one that no one else has ever seen before.
Maybe one that’s just as bright as planet Venus.
But after his mother’s passing, Jeongguk was immediately stripped away from his home in rural Busan and thrown into a crowded foster home in the middle of the city. Despite the fact that he refused to look up at the night sky ever again, the Astronomer’s Log was the only belonging of his that Jeongguk decided to bring along with him. It was the last piece of his past that he held onto as a reminder that once upon a time, he had a warm and happy place to call ‘home’.
☆
Growing up in the foster home wasn’t easy for Jeongguk. Having a naturally shy personality and a skinnier build than most boys, he was repeatedly bullied by the others from the very first day of his arrival. They kicked him around like a toy, shoved him against tables and chairs and called him names like ‘sissy’ and ‘coward’. All because Jeongguk didn’t appreciate the same hobbies as they did. While the other boys spent their days playing soccer or basketball in the courtyard, Jeongguk preferred to sit alone in the small, herb garden by the side of the house. He liked to sketch (into a brand new notebook) the different plants and flowers that grew so beautifully into their tiny, little pots. Sometimes, he’d help his foster mom water the plants in the morning as well. And he’d always make sure to sit by and admire the way that the water droplets reflected against the afternoon sun like twinkling stars.
Maybe that’s why he liked the garden so much.
Even so, no one at the home seemed to really understand how Jeongguk felt on the inside. He had lost his mother at the age of ten, right when he had just started to build his dreams around this vision of a happy and successful life in the future. One where technology has advanced to the point where people can easily travel into space and visit the planets of the Solar System. One where he, famous astronomer Jeon Jeongguk, stands hand-in-hand with his mother as they take their very first step together onto the surface of the Moon.
Venus would probably appear even brighter from there, Jeongguk thinks.
But when his mother passed away, Jeongguk felt like his entire soul had been shred into a million little pieces. Scattered around and left to rot in places without names, places where emotional meaning and sense of identity didn’t exist for Jeongguk. He was, in the most simplest terms, broken. So broken that he couldn’t find a way to string himself back together, even as he grew into his teenage years.
In high school, things were still very difficult for Jeongguk. He found himself overwhelmed by the multitude of superficial friendships and the shallow, meaningless chit chat that littered around the hallways like polluted air. From the very first year, Jeongguk decided to steer clear of everyone else. He spent the majority of his time alone, drawing in empty studios or listening to music up on the school’s rooftop. Through the four, long years of high school, the bullying never stopped. Physical, maybe not so much. Jeongguk had grown much taller than the average population, and his defined muscles scared off many of the jock-type bullies. But name-calling, false rumors and pointless humiliation? Those ones continued to plague Jeongguk’s life up until the day that he packed his bags and left the foster home for good.
☆
From the moment that eighteen-year-old Jeon Jeongguk stepped into his new dorm at Seoul International University, everything was just one surprise after the other.
First of all, his room. A shared studio with two single beds pushed against each side of the wall, leaving only a few meters of space in between. He was certain that he selected the ‘single bedroom’ option on his application, so he had no idea how he ended up in this horribly crammed set-up. There’s an open, living-slash-kitchen space in the corner of the room, so small that the back of the fridge bumped right up against the foot of Jeongguk’s bed. Great, just great. This rathole of a room was even smaller than his old one from that godforsaken foster home.
Second of all, his roommate. His assigned roommate turned out to be some rich, city boy who majored in Art and dressed like he had just stepped out of a Gucci runway show. He had one of those handsome but intimidating faces, a perfectly sculpted nose standing tall between his big, almond-shaped eyes and a strong, sharp jawline (as sharp as the knife that he probably hid behind his back). Jeongguk met a lot of these types in high school. The teenage, A-listers who looked down on ‘less fortunate’ kids like Jeongguk and made fun of them just to trick themselves into feeling more important than they actually were.
And maybe the universe decided to pull some extra-twisted joke on Jeongguk this time, but his roommate just happens to have the greatest obsession with the stars and the night sky.
The boy decorated the walls with–not one, not two, but– six different posters of Van Gogh’s Starry Night , even putting up a ridiculously massive, star-shaped lamp right in the middle of their bedroom. More than that, he covered the entire ceiling with around a hundred of those glow-in-the-dark star stickers that younger kids loved so much. When they went to bed each night, the entire room would light up with these disgustingly-green stars, much to Jeongguk’s pleasure.
He wanted to change rooms.
For eight years, not once did Jeongguk let himself look up into the night sky. He knew that his heart held too much emotional connection to the stars, and he learned the hard way that being a boy who felt things wasn’t going to do him any good in this messed up society. So, Jeongguk tried his best to push the emotions away. He still wanted to study Astronomy, but he decided to focus on the rational aspects of it instead. Numbers and calculations, facts and figures. This was the reason why Jeongguk applied for the Astrophysics program in SIU. A month later, he was unexpectedly accepted with an offer of a full-ride scholarship, which he was most thankful for.
But the damn scholarship status is the exact reason why the administrators wouldn’t allow him to request for a room change.
“Why do you hate my stars?” His roommate asks one night.
They had moved into the dorm for around a week and a half by then, but Jeongguk still refused to converse with the other in any way.
He stays quiet, pretending to be asleep.
“Don’t ignore me, I know you’re awake.”
Jeongguk groans, aggressively pulling his blanket over his head and hoping that the other would take the hint.
“Why do you hate my stars?” He asks again, a little louder this time.
Jeongguk sits up in his bed and shoots a glare at the other, “I’m trying to sleep, okay?”
“No, not okay.” His roommate replies, voice stern.
Jeongguk is slightly taken aback, “Excuse me?”
The boy knits his eyebrows together and crosses his arms over his chest, “Every night, you wait until I go to sleep, and you turn your reading light back on. It’s because you hate my glow-in-the-dark stars, right? You don’t want to see them, for some reason.”
Jeongguk only looks away.
“And when I turn my star lamp on, you always huff like some pissed-off, bunny rabbit!”
“What–”
“Please, I just–” The other softens his voice, “I just want to know what’s bothering you.”
To Jeongguk’s surprise, the brunette abruptly walks over to take a seat beside him on his bed. Their arms brush against each other, triggering Jeongguk’s knee-jerk reaction to jump as far away from the other as possible. He catches a whiff of his roommate’s shampoo as he does so, a hint of lavender and wild berries brushing timidly against his nose.
“Please?” He asks again, voice deep but soothing.
From the opposite end of the bed, Jeongguk suddenly finds himself feeling some sort of warmth on the inside.
“Fine.” He surrenders, “They’re just….not right.”
“Hmm? What do you mean, they’re not right?”
“The s-stars….constellations,” Jeongguk visibly gulps, “wrong placing.”
His roommate gasps, “You know the constellations?!”
“I’m an Astrophysics major.” Jeongguk replies quietly, still averting his eyes, “But I don’t wanna talk about it, so don’t ask.”
“Oh. Okay.” The boy gets up awkwardly, scratches his head, “Well, I’ll take the stickers down until I know how to put them up correctly, then. If that makes you feel better?”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk mumbles under his breath. Thank you, he thinks, before lying back down on the bed.
He faces the wall and starts to close his eyes. Behind him, he can still hear his roommate pacing about, those expensive Gucci slippers that he wears shuffling here and there around the room. He seems to be looking for something, but Jeongguk didn’t feel the need to give it much attention. That is, until he hears the sound of wheels being rolled across the hardwood floors of their dorm.
The computer chair? Why would he need–
“Oh shit-” Jeongguk grumbles as he flips off the bed just in time to catch his roommate, tumbling from the chair and falling backwards onto the floor. The wheeled chair that was just under the other’s feet slides all the way to the opposite side of their dorm, slamming into the door with a loud crash.
Jeongguk pulls a face at the sound, hands instinctively wrapping a little tighter around the boy’s thin waist.
“Are you okay?” He asks, the unplanned urgency in his voice startling himself a bit.
And when the boy finally looks up to meet his gaze halfway, Jeongguk almost forgets how to breathe.
He wanted to yell at the other. For being careless, for not thinking things through, and most of all, for assuming that it’s a good idea to step onto a chair with wheels just to peel some stickers off of the ceiling. Instead, Jeongguk finds himself choking on his words, unable to speak.
There are beautiful, dark-brown eyes, staring straight up into his own. An unexpected innocence lingers behind them, a hint of wonder and curiosity swimming in those sparkling orbs. They almost look like…. stars , Jeongguk thinks. How can someone’s eyes be so captivating?
His roommate’s arms are wrapping tight around his neck, naturally pulling him close. His eyes mindlessly begin to trace along the planes of the other’s strikingly symmetrical face. His long lashes, down to the unique mole on the tip of his nose. The smooth, golden skin of his cheeks, down to….a small, glow-in-the-dark star, sticking onto the corner of his mouth. Before he realizes, Jeongguk is reaching out to peel the sticker from the other’s face, thumb brushing ever so slightly over his soft, pink lips as he makes to do so. Coming to his senses, Jeongguk inhales once, suddenly aware of their proximity.
“T-Thanks,” his roommate stutters, a faint flush coloring at his cheeks, “I’m Taehyung, by the way. Kim Taehyung.”
“I know.” Jeongguk stares dumbly for a second, then blinks rapidly as he stumbles over an explanation, “I-I mean, your name is….uhh…. literally written beside mine on our door.”
“Yes, silly. But we’ve never really talked before, so I wanted to introduce myself, properly. I’m Taehyung.”
“I’m Jeongguk.”
“That’s a nice name.”
“Thanks.”
“Hey, Jeongguk?”
“Yeah?”
“Can you uhh….let go of me now?”
“Oh y-yeah, sure.”
“Oh, and Jeongguk?”
“Hmm?”
“You have a nice voice, you know? You really should talk more often.”
☆
Getting to know Kim Taehyung was like stargazing.
Taehyung reminded Jeongguk of a feeling that he thought he’d left behind with the remains of his broken childhood, long, long ago. Of those late, autumn nights when Jeongguk would gaze into the infinite abyss of the pitch-black skies and let himself become lost amongst the graveyard of glittering stars. It’s the delightful naivety of childlike wonder. The sense of experiencing incredible beauty for the first time, and the ability to consume it all without a single worry or concern to plague his mind whilst doing so.
When Taehyung talked about his art, Jeongguk found himself completely mesmerized by the entire experience of simply watching the other move. From the way that Taehyung’s words stumbled over themselves as he spoke of his passions to the fire that lit up behind his eyes as he shared his lifelong dreams, Jeongguk couldn’t look away even if he tried.
Ever since he started on his own, Jeongguk would often get overwhelmed by the fast-paced world that endlessly spun around him. Expectations, norms, the struggle to fit into society’s mold that everyone else so mindlessly accepted; these things troubled Jeongguk much more than he could ever begin to verbalize. Even when the world took his mother away from him, Jeongguk felt like it happened in a mere second. One snap of a finger, and he was left alone in this great, big world, taking (almost literal) baby steps to fight for survival.
But whenever Jeongguk and Taehyung spent some quality time together, simply playing video games or talking all the way to the sunrise, Jeongguk found himself slowing down to a much more preferable, and much more comfortable pace. He could breathe better, smile more, and he began to stop and appreciate the little things in life that he’d normally take for granted.
With Taehyung’s help, Jeongguk slowly learned to fall in love with life again. To appreciate the pleasant smell of rain and to feel the warm, summer breeze as it combed through his hair. To find comfort in the sound of ocean waves crashing against the shore and to be thankful for even having the chance to wake up for another day.
Quirky, intelligent, and beautiful both inside and out, Kim Taehyung was the most perfect person in the eyes of Jeon Jeongguk.
Taehyung reminded Jeongguk of Venus.
The brightest star above the horizon, shining light into the darkness of Jeongguk’s never-ending night sky, reassuring him, telling him that he’ll never be alone again.
But the more he got to know Taehyung, the more Jeongguk realized that he wasn’t a perfect person after all. Like Jeongguk, Taehyung was also made up of broken bits and pieces, memories of his past that shaped him into who he was.
How he’s never seen an actual starry night before, because he grew up around the excessive light pollution of a capital city. How he refused to eat canned food because they reminded him of a time when his family struggled with money, and canned food was all they had to share amongst five people for months. How he’s deathly afraid of the dark, because he was locked in the basement of his house one time when he was only four years old.
Maybe that’s why he dressed the way he did. Maybe that’s why he put up all those glow-in-the-dark stars.
Jeongguk listened to Taehyung talk about his past with a new perspective in mind. He thought back to the way that he was quick to judge Taehyung’s character from the moment that they met, realizing how incredibly wrong and unfair he was to the other. To Jeongguk, Taehyung’s stories reminded him of the ones that his mother told him when he was younger. If Taehyung was a star in the sky, then his stories were like a map of constellations, drawing lines from the past to the present and proving how strong he was for overcoming all of his troubles.
“Gukkie?” Taehyung calls, unzipping their tent and stepping inside.
At the moment, they are on a camping trip in Gapyeong with a small group of friends from the university. Mostly Taehyung’s friends, and all older than Jeongguk. But he’s starting to feel a little more comfortable with them as he’s getting to know them more and more.
The time is around 10 pm, with everyone hanging outside by the campfire, drinking and laughing at each other’s stories while Jeongguk lies alone in his and Taehyung’s tent. Jeongguk had excused himself at the end of dinner, around sundown, saying that he felt a headache creeping up and needed to sleep it off for a bit. The truth is, Jeongguk is still afraid to look up at the night sky, and on the top of a mountain like this, it’ll probably be hard to avoid the sight of the stars.
“Hey.” Jeongguk responds, sitting up from in his sleeping bag and smiling softly at the other.
“You feeling any better?” Taehyung asks, settling down beside him.
“Yeah, I’m okay. Might sleep a little more.”
Taehyung leans in closer, squinting his eyes, “You’re lying.” He retorts.
“What?” Jeongguk stutters, “I-I’m–”
“Don’t even try to come up with some lame excuse, Guk. I know you better than anyone else.” Taehyung rolls his eyes and shuffles in closer.
Jeongguk always hated when people invade his personal space without warning, he still does. But from the very first day that he became friends with one Kim Taehyung, the other had somehow managed to creep into his kinesphere in only a matter of weeks. Before he even realized, Jeongguk had almost become too comfortable with having Taehyung physically close to him at all times. Sometimes, he’d even feel empty without the other by his side.
“Did you get to see the stars, Tae?” Jeongguk asks, steering the conversation away from himself.
“Not yet,” Taehyung replies, “I was waiting to see it with you!”
“Oh.”
“Come on, you should get some fresh air,” Taehyung offers, boxy smile on full display as he tugs at Jeongguk’s sweater, “Maybe stargazing will make you feel better too!”
“No, I–” Jeongguk almost chuckles at how pathetic he suddenly feels, “I don’t want to.”
He doesn’t look up, but he can feel Taehyung’s smile fading away in an instant. Jeongguk nibbles on his bottom lip, hands nervously fidgeting with the hem of his sweater as he contemplates what to say next.
“Gukkie?” Taehyung asks. He’s using that soft voice of his again, the one that makes Jeongguk feel all warm inside, “You’re thinking.”
“I’m thinking.” Jeongguk echoes, still unsure of how to continue.
“Tell me what you’re thinking about.” Taehyung whispers as he brings a hand to rub comforting circles on Jeongguk’s back.
Jeongguk takes a quick second to himself, tries to sort through the thousands of thoughts that are fighting for dominance inside his mind, “I w-want to, Tae, but I don’t know how.”
“Okay,” Taehyung hums, before resting his chin on Jeongguk’s shoulder, “Let’s start with easy questions, then?”
Jeongguk nods.
“Tell me,” Taehyung starts, “why Astrophysics?”
That night, Jeongguk told Taehyung everything.
How his father left ever since he was a baby, and how his mother raised him up all on her on. How she passed down her love for Astronomy to Jeongguk and how they drove up to the mountains every week to watch the stars together. He told Taehyung about his mother’s passing, and about the aftermath of him being thrown into the terrible foster home in central Busan. How he was constantly bullied for being different, and how he decided to deal with it by replacing emotions with rationalization instead.
Even after being friends for years, Jeongguk never realized how much of himself he actually kept hidden away from Taehyung. It’s not like he doesn’t want to talk about it, his muddled past and all the feelings that he forcefully rejected for so long. Sometimes, all he craves is just to have someone who’d listen to him and understand . And he’d always known that Taehyung could be that person for him, be the star that shines light and hope into the darkness of his life. But Jeongguk had spent so much of his mental energy worrying about the outcome of opening up that he’d unknowingly buried his feelings deeper down in the process.
When he finally opened up to Taehyung that night, however, the other hung onto every single one of his words like it were the most important stories in the entire world.
Taehyung listened, and listened, and listened. He sat by Jeongguk’s side the entire night, cried along with him and held him tight as the temperatures outside went up with the sunrise in the morning. Jeongguk could feel it all so immensely, the safety of Taehyung’s support and the warmth of his embrace. Taehyung made him feel like his stories mattered, like they deserved to be heard. And for the first time in a long while, Jeongguk felt understood.
“I don’t care when, or where, or what time it is. If you ever need to talk, please remember that I’m here for you, Gukkie.” Taehyung whispered as he placed a soft peck onto Jeongguk’s cheek, “I got you, always.”
In that moment, Jeongguk felt like he might also be some sort of star in the night sky. A small one, maybe, existing alone, hundreds of light years away from Earth and all of its people. When everyone looked at him, all they saw was a tiny, little speck of dust. An insignificant fleck of light that wasn’t worthy of their time and attention, especially not when there were brighter, more beautiful stars to gaze upon.
With Taehyung, it was different.
Taehyung always made Jeongguk feel comfortable about his own feelings, no matter how good or bad they were. He celebrated the better days with Jeongguk and stayed by his side during the worse ones. Even after dating for two years, their relationship only continued to bloom into a strong bond of selfless reassurance and security.
Jeongguk found the thought of it to be quite funny. Ever since he was a kid, he saw himself as an astronomer, the wise scientist who studied the stars and other galaxies beyond. Even when he finally found Taehyung, he had thought he was the one who gazed upon the brilliance of the other as if he were a shining star in the sky.
But it was Astronomy in reverse.
It was Taehyung, who became the astronomer that Jeongguk had always dreamt of being. It was Taehyung, who kindly greeted the broken pieces of Jeongguk’s soul, studied each and every one of them carefully, and strung them back together like constellations in the night sky. Gazing through his telescope, Taehyung pulled Jeongguk into focus, the light years that separated Jeongguk from the rest of the world calmly fading away into zero.
That night, they held each other close, leaving no space in between. As they laid together underneath an infinity of twinkling stars, Jeongguk allowed himself to revisit the myths and tales of the constellations for the first time in a long while. And when he shared those stories with Taehyung, he spoke about them like they were his oldest friends.
Maybe he figured it out that night–while they were pointing to the sky and laughing about the new constellations that they created together–or maybe he’d known it all along; but in the blink of a shooting star, Jeongguk suddenly realized that he was completely and undeniably in love with Kim Taehyung.
☆
“Gukkie?” Jeongguk hears Taehyung’s voice whispering by his ear. “Time to wake up, babe. It’s almost midnight.” He feels Taehyung’s soft lips pressing against his temple, warm body snuggling close.
Jeongguk smiles.
They’re parked somewhere along the outskirts of Yangpyeong-gun, cuddling on a bed of blankets and pillows that they set up behind the back of an old, pickup truck as they waited for the time to pass. Eyes still closed, Jeongguk shivers as he feels the rush of December’s wind blowing against his tired body. He stretches his arms to the right, pulls Taehyung’s body even closer, humming in comfort.
When he finally opens his eyes, Jeongguk is immediately greeted with the familiar sight of millions upon millions of twinkling stars. As always, he tries to find the constellations first; Cassiopeia, Andromeda, Perseus, Pegasus, always in the same place, always close to each other.
Jeongguk blinks once, a heavy feeling suddenly weighing down onto his heart. The one thing that’s bittersweet about the stars, is that they never change. No matter where he is, no matter how many years it’s been, the map of stars in the sky will always be the same. As Jeongguk looks up at the sky tonight, he’s taken back in time to when he was five years old again. He’s sitting on the hood of his mother’s Mustang, leaning into her embrace as they discuss the endless possibilities of the universe and its mysteries.
It’s almost melancholic, how gazing upon the night sky reminded Jeongguk of the saddest moments in his life, yet he does it anyway. He’s learned from Taehyung that sometimes, it’s okay to remind yourself of the sorrows that you’ve worked so hard to overcome.
It’s okay to recognize how strong you’ve grown to be.
A cold finger suddenly pokes at the tip of Jeongguk’s nose, catching his attention, “Gukkie,” Taehyung calls.
“Hmm?”
“You’re thinking.”
“I’m thinking.”
“Tell me what you’re thinking about.”
Jeongguk chuckles, “Everything.” He says.
Taehyung nuzzles in closer, stretching up to press a deep kiss onto Jeongguk’s shivering lips. He takes the lead slowly, and Jeongguk finds himself melting into it as easily as he did on their very first time. He inhales sharply, breathing in the sweet scent that is just so distinctly Taehyung and lets himself feel the high of being so incredibly close to the person that he loves. Taehyung pulls back for a split second, coming back in to nibble at Jeongguk’s lower lip as his hands tug playfully at his hair.
Jeongguk loves it, loves the way that Taehyung so effortlessly manages to silence the billions of thoughts that run through his mind in an instant. It gets exhausting, sometimes, living inside of his own mind like this. But every time that the other is around, the messy thoughts in Jeongguk’s head seem to slow down, fade into the far distance. All that’s left behind, is one, single thought:
Taehyung.
“Better?” Taehyung asks, kissing down the column of Jeongguk’s neck and settling there for good.
“Much better.” Jeongguk replies as he kisses Taehyung’s hair softly.
“You don’t mind driving out here with me tonight, right?”
“No,” Jeongguk frowns, “why would I?”
“Well, most people like to watch the fireworks on New Year’s Eve.” Taehyung chuckles, warm breath tickling at Jeongguk’s neck.
“I’d rather watch the stars,” Jeongguk laughs, “Mother Earth’s natural fireworks.”
Taehyung props himself up and shoots Jeongguk a weird look, “Cheesy.” He comments.
“Actually, I’d rather just look at you.” Jeongguk teases.
Taehyung barks out a laugh, “ Disgustingly cheesy.”
“Fine, I’ll stop then.”
“No don’t–” Taehyung huffs, pretending to be angry, “I like it when you call me….that”
“Call you what?” Jeongguk pretends to ask back.
“You know, that nickname .”
“What nickname, babe?”
“Babe!!! Don’t tease me, you know which one I mean!”
“Hmm….” Jeongguk presses a finger under his nose, pretending to think, “My star?”
“Mhm,” Taehyung nods, smiling widely from ear to ear.
“Okay, my star,” Jeongguk smiles back, “how else may I entertain you tonight?”
Taehyung hums as he brings his fingers up to tickle at Jeongguk’s chin, a favorite habit of his, “Pick a star for me, Gukkie. Which one belongs to me?”
“That one.” Jeongguk answers in an instant, not having to think about it at all.
“Venus?”
“Yes, Venus.”
“Why?” Taehyung asks.
“Because,” Jeongguk’s smile widens, “my mom told me, that Venus would always guide me home.”
Taehyung grins, nuzzles into his embrace.
“And when I look at you, I don’t feel so lost anymore.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because you are my home, and no matter where we go, I’ll always find a home in you.” Jeongguk replies, reaching up a finger to teasingly poke at Taehyung’s nose.
Taehyung scrunches his nose in fake protest, before letting out a soft giggle as he says, “You make me so happy.”
“You make me so happy too.”
“Hey, Gukkie?”
“Yes, my star?”
“I think it’s midnight now.” Taehyung says, giving Jeongguk a quick peck on the lips, “Happy New Year, babe. I love you so much.”
Jeongguk closes the distance between them once more, pressing a deeper kiss onto Taehyung’s pink lips as he whispers, “I love you too, my star.”
“Happy New Year.”
End.
Bonus: The newest addition to Jeongguk’s ‘Astronomer’s Log’ is a sketch of Taehyung, smiling, with the word ‘Venus’ written underneath ☆