Chapter Text
From a young age, Jinyoung was introduced to the world of wealth. If he were to ask for a cup of water, he wouldn’t stand up and get it himself from the kitchen—all that he needed to do was call out for his butler’s name and he’d get what he wanted; even if it was as simple as a drink.
He was told by his parents that he was to take over their business in the future. They were one of the leading owners of hospitals all over the country of South Korea. Everywhere you looked, you’d be seeing the name Bae Industries; pasted on the cover of newspapers to billboards for advertisements.
All Jinyoung knew was wealth, happiness, and success.
That’s why when he turned the age of fifteen, he was still unfamiliar with the concept of poverty and the hardships that came along with it.
They were far away from the city, an hour or so—is what his father told him when he asked the night prior. The scenery was a big give away, a contrast from the busy streets and tall buildings. Instead, there were fields that barely grew grass and run-down houses greeted them as they entered the part of town.
“Where are we, father?” Jinyoung asks, bouncing in his seat. His tailored leather shoes tapped against the floor of the vehicle.
“A place that’s going to get us more money, son.” His father has the slightest smile on his face, eyes never leaving the papers that sit on his lap.
The driver stops the car in front of a shabby building. The windows are boarded-up and the gate looks almost as if someone tried to take it apart on purpose.
Jinyoung had to admit, he was inquisitive.
The smell was not inviting when he stepped out of the vehicle, but he held his breath and followed his father into the building.
An old man, he looked close to being sixty-years-old, greeted them. “I’m so honored that you’re here, Mr.Bae. I can’t say it enough times to thank you for buying the orphanage.”
Jinyoung furrowed his eyebrows. He couldn’t bring to himself to figure out why his father bought a building like this. This place wasn’t even as close to how clean and tall the hospitals they had back in the city. He frowned and crossed his arms, scanning the torn-up walls and the scratched-up wooden flooring.
“Oh, there’s no need. I’ll have to thank you instead for letting our company be able to take care of the orphanage. I know we usually own hospitals, but we wanted to do something more to benefit others.” Jinyoung’s father nods, learning over to shake the man’s hand.
Just as Jinyoung was about to sit on the patched-up velvet couch, his father calls him over to greet the man.
“This must be your son Jinyoung you were talking about?” The man scans him up and down. His face was stern, rotten almost, but Jinyoung knew better to say that during a first impression.
“Yes, he’ll be taking over my company in a few years, so I wanted to bring him along to show him our new additions.” Jinyoung’s father puts his arm over his shoulder before bringing his hand to ruffle up his black hair. “Jinyoung, you can walk around and scan the place for me while Mr. Kim and I talk.”
Jinyoung nods and bows politely before walking towards the hallway that led towards the other rooms. As he walks down, he could hear distant murmurs behind the wooden doors. He begins to think he’s stuck in a horror film. If that wasn’t enough, there were rows and rows of portraits that seemed endless.
So Jinyoung does what he does when he’s nervous, he fiddles with his fingers and focuses on the heels of his leather shoes as he makes his way down the hallway.
There wasn’t much for him to explore. With each creaky step that he took on the wooden floor, he wanted to go further. However, he was taught at a young age that invading private property was impolite.
But, a door catches his attention at the end of the hallway.
It was garnished with the most delicately decorated flowers and the colors contrasted from the dull beige that was plastered throughout the building. When Jinyoung got closer to the door, he was surprised to see that the flowers that were on the door weren’t fake like the ones the florist laid out in the entrance of their mansion; but instead the flowers had petals that looked as if they would fall if you blew on them and there were fuzzy hairs on the green stem that travelled down to the doorknob.
He couldn’t help himself when he turned the doorknob and the murmurs stopped immediately.
Nothing could’ve prepared his fifteen-year-old self for the scene that unfolded in front of his eyes. A boy with the most beautiful eyes, lips that looked like they were dipped in cherry soda and a button nose to top it all off.
He had to admit, the boy was breathtaking. He’s seen the girls that his parents would ask his opinion for—they said it was for his future marriage, but he’d always reject—and he had to admit they were beautiful, but the male in front of him was not just beautiful; he oozed vulnerability. A feeling that Jinyoung has never came across before.
Jinyoung couldn’t move. He felt like he was intruding as his eyes directed to the stuffed bunny that was in the boy’s hands. There were teacups and a big plastic kettle in front of him, and it would’ve looked like a scene from Alice in Wonderland if it wasn’t for the house they were in.
“I, uh—I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt, I—” Jinyoung stutters.
He’s caught off guard when the boy in front of him smiles. It wasn’t a wide smile, not one with teeth; but it was one that warmed Jinyoung’s young heart.
“Want to join?”
Jinyoung later figures out that the boy’s name was Park Jihoon. And though he looked younger, he was actually a year older than him at the prime age of sixteen.
“You don’t look sixteen.” Jinyoung comments as Jihoon pours ‘tea’ into the plastic teacup in front of him.
They were sitting in front of the window, one that wasn’t boarded up like the ones Jinyoung saw when he first came into the building. Instead, it was furnished with blinds that barely closed. The sun seeped into the room and Jinyoung was starting to wonder if there were even any lamps in this house.
“I get that a lot.” Jihoon says, humming. “The other kids in the house thought I was twelve when I first came, but I was actually just thirteen.”
“Other kids?”
Jinyoung must’ve looked incredibly confused because Jihoon was giving him a look of disbelief.
“You’re in an orphanage , of course there would be other kids than me.”
His tone was firm, stern almost. Jinyoung jumps at the male’s sudden change of voice.
“What’s so bad about orphanages?”
Jihoon shook his head but let out a laugh nonetheless. “You really haven’t been exposed to the world, have you rich boy?”
“I went to France during my birthday earlier this year and the year prior I went to—”
“I’m not talking about places. I’m talking about the real world.”
“I still don’t understand what you’re saying.”
Jihoon sighs and he moves to face the younger male. “You really don’t know?”
Jinyoung shakes his head.
“It’s where kids go when, you know.” Jihoon pauses, not breaking eye contact. “Their parents die or if their parents abandon them. People give it a bad rep but, I don’t think it’s all that bad—it gives people like me another home, a refugee almost.”
“How about you?”
“Me?”
“Your parents.”
Jihoon lets out a hollow laugh. “You’re not one to beat around the bush, huh? From what I was told, my mom was an alcoholic and my dad ran drugs for a living. One day the police broke down of our house and before I knew it, I ended up here.”
For the first time, Jinyoung feels the emotion of sympathy.
So far he’s only lived in a world of wealth, a world where he’s only been greeted with overflowing happiness and nothing else; but here was a boy who he met merely an hour ago who lived in the opposite side of the spectrum—as if he was in another world that Jinyoung would never be able to live in.
“I’m sorry.” Is all that comes out of his lips.
“Don’t be, I’m used to it. I’m just glad I have somewhere to stay. I get fed, clothed, and even a bed to sleep on. What else could I ask for?” Jihoon smiles, and it’s a smile that shows his pearly rows of teeth this time. “And it’s even better now. We finally have someone taking care of the orphanage—Mr. Bae, was it?”
Jinyoung’s ears perk up as he hears his surname fall from the boy’s lips. “You know my father?”
“ Everyone knows your father, Jinyoung. I’m pretty sure the whole country does. A company that holds a majority of the shares in the stock market and owns all of the hospitals in Seoul is pretty powerful if you ask me.”
Jinyoung didn’t need to hear that from Jihoon to know. His family was on their way to becoming one of the wealthiest in South Korea and he was proud of that.
“I’ll be the one taking care of the company in a few years.” Jinyoung says, a proud smile pulling on the corners of his lips.
“Are you waiting for me to say it’s an honor to be talking to the heir of Bae Industries?”
“Is it a sin to say yes?”
Jihoon lets out the loudest laugh he’s given in the past hour they’ve been talking to each other. He tilts his head back and Jinyoung thinks Jihoon looks the most beautiful when he’s happy.
“I’ll make sure that we take good care of your orphanage.” Jinyoung says.
“I know you will. Don’t let me down, rich boy.”
They meet a month later and Jinyoung ends up in the same room he met Jihoon last time. Instead of flowers on the door, there are now candy wrappers that were decorated sporadically throughout the door frame.
When he opens the door, he’s greeted with the same Jihoon, the same bunny, and of course the same set of teacups in front of him.
Jinyoung wishes that the blinds were able to open up a little more because he wants to see the male’s face. The room was dimly lit and there was still no lamp to be seen anywhere. He reminds himself to buy one for Jihoon before the next time he comes back.
“You know, when I was in Europe, they had similar teacups to yours.” Jinyoung mentions as he watches Jihoon play with the cup that was currently nudged in between his thumb and his index finger.
“Don’t be silly, mine are plastic.” Jihoon snickers.
“At least you won’t be able to break the cup if you drop it.”
“I’ll give you that.” Jihoon hums in agreement before laying back onto the wall that his bed was against, bringing the stuffed bunny up to his chest. “Is it beautiful?”
“What is?”
“Europe. Travelling.”
Jihoon brings his knees closer to him and stares at Jinyoung, anticipating an answer. Jinyoung wants to give him answer that he wants to hear; that the sunrises are more beautiful when you watch on the rooftop of a building in Europe, that the air smells sweeter when you’re walking down the street of Paris where the number of bakeries are endless.
Instead, he chooses to answer with something that his father would like him to say.
“Well.” Jinyoung pauses. “It’s beautiful alright. I prefer Seoul though.”
“Why? When you’ve gone everywhere and have way more to appreciate and experience, you rich boy.”
“I haven’t gone everywhere—”
“It’s a joke.” Jihoon laughs, shaking his head. “You sure are sensitive. How are you going to be like that when you’re gonna be in charge of the company a few years from now?”
Jinyoung stays quiet for a moment before answering. “I’ll be like my father.”
“Your father is pretty intimidating though.”
“I can be intimidating too.”
“Bae Jinyoung, intimidating? The same Bae Jinyoung who agreed to play tea with me just a month ago?”
“You asked me if I wanted to join! How was I supposed to say no?”
“You could’ve just closed the door and left.”
“Yeah, well. Maybe I like tea.”
Jihoon snorts at that. He doesn’t mention that the ‘tea’ that he was pouring was invisible and instead he plays with the dusty ears of his stuffed bunny. “You really want to be like your father, huh?”
“Of course, I’m his son. His heir.”
“You want to know what I think?” Jihoon grabs Jinyoung’s attention as he was currently focused on the messy desk that was in the corner of the room. With the crumpled papers and textbooks piled up, it almost looked like a replica of his own room back at the mansion.
Jinyoung nods, a gesture for Jihoon to continue speaking.
“I think you’ll be different from your father.” Jihoon pauses for a second, watching as Jinyoung’s lips turned into a frown. “But, in a good way.”
“Do you think the Bae Jinyoung in the future will help others succeed or make himself succeed first?”
Jihoon flicks a piece of dust towards Jinyoung’s direction and smiles. “A little bit of both.”
Whenever Jinyoung’s father visits, Jinyoung tags along as well.
There’s been improvements to the orphanage. The windows weren’t boarded anymore and were replaced with a new set of glass, the dead fields of grass were now a healthy color of green and the gate even opened automatically.
It’s only been six months, but Jinyoung’s proud of what the orphanage looks like now. There were even advertisements for it on the local newspaper—his butler showed it to him earlier in the month—and more people have been taking interest in funding for the building.
“I call it ‘A New Beginning’, it’s a project we’ll have on hand from now on. We’ll be taking care of multiple orphanage houses starting next month. What do you think, Jinyoung?” His father asks him as they’re seated in the car to go to Jihoon’s orphanage.
Jinyoung’s snapped out of his thoughts, flinching as he turns his head immediately towards his father. “Sorry father, I wasn’t paying attention.”
“I said, what do you think about taking care of multiple orphanages? I think it’ll end up giving us good profit.”
“Is it always about the money?” Jinyoung accidentally slips out, leading to his father raising his eyebrows.
“Of course it is, son. You know that.”
Jinyoung did know. He knew too well. But, ever since he’s been introduced to this side of the world, he’s been starting to hate that wealth was superior compared to no matter what aspect.
This time around, Jihoon wasn’t in his bedroom. This caused Jinyoung to panic because there wasn’t a lot to go around in the orphanage; only a few rooms and a beat-up sofa that his father still needs to replace in the future.
He looked through every crook and cranny of Jihoon’s room but found him nowhere, not even the closet. That was until he looked outside the window. There was Jihoon in all his beautiful glory sitting in the middle of the new grass fields that were put into the backyard a few weeks ago. It was a shame that he was only able to visit once a month, he’s never caught up to date on what’s installed in the orphanage.
When Jinyoung pushes the sliding doors to the side, he catches Jihoon’s attention. The male looks up at him and gestures him to come over. Jinyoung does just that, even sitting next to him on the grass. If his butler was here, he would be yelled at—that the grass would stain his brown slacks—but he doesn’t care.
“No teacups this time?” Jinyoung asks, immediately noticing the absence of the plastic set that Jihoon normally has.
As Jinyoung walks closer, he notices immediately that the elder male’s stark fair skin was more mesmerizing under the sun. It was as if he was glowing, the sun kissing the apples of his cheeks. It was rare for Jinyoung to see him outside of his bedroom, it was always the dim lighting that they depended on when they looked at each other. But, Jinyoung thinks he likes Jihoon like this—out in the sun, with his delicate features out for everyone to see.
Jihoon shakes his head, his bare toes intertwining with the grass. “Teacups are only allowed in my bedroom. I’d rather take my time and enjoy the grass while it lasts.”
“It’s always gonna be here.”
“But, it’s never always been here. It’s better to appreciate what you have now, don’t you think?”
Jinyoung almost forgets that before the fields were this green, the only thing the backyard had were old withered plants that were previously in the garden. He also almost forgets that Jihoon’s not used to green grass; along with vibrant colors of red, blue, and yellow.
He’s interrupted from his thoughts when he hears his father yelling from inside of the building. Something along the lines of ‘We didn’t agree to this’ could barely be heard and Jihoon catches his attention when he sighs loudly.
“It’s getting pretty heated in there, isn’t it?” Jihoon says, eyes focused on his bunny. “I wonder what they’re arguing about.”
Jinyoung feels like he has an edge to what the conversation was about, but he doesn’t know if he wants to announce that to Jihoon. If it was appropriate to tell it to Jihoon, would the male be disappointed that he may not be able to come every month to visit the orphanage? Or would the male not care at all and brush the subject away?
So he does what he thinks his father would do and tells him anyway.
“We’re going to fund more orphanages.” Jinyoung says, watching Jihoon’s reaction. But, there was none to his disappointment. The male just sat there and if anyone else was watching they’d think that Jihoon was a still picture.
Jihoon hums, letting his head fall back to relish the heat of the sun. “I see. That’s good.”
“You’re not disappointed?” Jinyoung asks, almost a bit too desperate to hear a ‘I am’ from Jihoon.
“Why should I be disappointed? You’re helping out kids that are like me out there.”
“But, I won’t be able to come every month anymore—”
Jihoon snaps his head towards Jinyoung’s direction and sends him a frown that makes him stop his words. “I’m not going to disappear, Jinyoung. Be it a month or two months or even a year—I’ll be here.”
“Are you sure?”
“In the past six months that you’ve known me, have I ever lied to you?”
Jinyoung shuts up at that, shaking his head.
“Exactly. So go what you need to do, change people’s lives. Be the Bae Jinyoung you want to be. I’ll always be here waiting to share a cup of tea with you.”
Half of Jinyoung wants to cry, the other half wants to hug the life out of Jihoon but all he does is links his pinky with the other male, crossing his index finger and middle finger and smiles. “Promise me?”
“Of course.”
Jihoon wraps his pinky around Jinyoung’s, before crossing his index finger and middle finger.
The sound of the wind was picking up behind them, the smell of freshly cut grass whisked near Jinyoung’s nose and he thinks he wants to stay like this. Longer if he could, but he knew he couldn’t.
And when he watches Jihoon pluck the green grass from where they were sitting on—for the first time in his life, Jinyoung feels like his heart is swelling.
The next time Jinyoung visits the orphanage is later than he imagined, instead of two months, it became five months. He feels butterflies in the pit of his stomach, nervous and excited to see Jihoon who he hasn’t seen for the longest time. He wonders if the male grew taller, which would disappoint him because he’s already shorter than him.
He carried a small box with him when he enters Jihoon’s room. It contained a lamp, one that he promised himself to get Jihoon a few months back.
When he opens the room, there were no murmurs. He’s curious and all makes sense when he’s greeted with a sleeping Jihoon who was cuddling with his usual bunny. The male looked more sweet than he usually did, long eyelashes and mouth slightly open for light snores to slip through.
He lets the box sit on the desk on the corner of the room before making his way towards Jihoon. As he looked closer, he realized that the color of the male’s hair was no longer black—but instead the shade of dark brown that contrasts perfectly with his fair skin.
Jinyoung pulls the chair from Jihoon’s desk quietly, making sure to not make a noise before placing it so that he was in front of the sleeping boy. Gently, he lets his hand come close to the male’s face, moving away the strands of hair from his eyes.
Jihoon stirs in his sleep, groaning a little before bringing his hand up to rub the sleep from his eyes. He furrowed his eyebrows, trying to adjust his vision to the handsome male that was currently sitting in front of him.
“Jinyoung?” He asks, his voice still hoarse from sleep. He’s squinting but Jinyoung still thinks he’s the most beautiful person he’s ever came across.
“That’s me.” Jinyoung says, a chuckle escaping his lips as he watches the elder continue to make up what the situation currently was.
“I’m not dreaming, am I?” Jihoon brought his hands up to cup at Jinyoung’s cheeks before closing in dangerously close.
Jinyoung stays still, not able to move. He’s never been this close to the male before, not even when they would wrestle on his bed from all their teasing and board games they would play.
“You aren’t.” Jinyoung manages to breathe out, trying to distract himself from the close proximity that was between them.
Jihoon’s eyes were fully open now, his confused face now replaced with a wide smile. He removes his hands from Jinyoung’s face before throwing his arms around his neck. He’s screaming Jinyoung’s name and the said male almost falls off the chair, but he doesn’t mind because he sees the smile that he loves the most on Jihoon’s face. That’s all he could ask for after the past five months he’s been gone.
“You brought me a what?” Jihoon asks, still on his bed as he watches Jinyoung grab the box from his desk. Still as messy as ever.
They just finished from Jihoon hugging Jinyoung for about a good twenty minutes. Jinyoung swears he couldn’t breathe and that his neck was turning red, but he enjoyed himself otherwise.
“A lamp. I know, I know. It sounds lame.” Jinyoung sits down on the chair in front of Jihoon’s bed again before handing him the box. “But, trust me. You’ll like it.”
When Jihoon opens the box, he’s stares in awe and he swears that tears were starting to form at the corner of his eyes. The lamp was anything but ordinary. The bright shade of pink welcomed him and the end of the lamp looked like a teacup, just like the one that Jihoon always had when Jinyoung came to visit. And if that wasn’t enough, the on/off button was in the shape of a bunny.
It flawlessly portrayed the Jihoon that Jinyoung adored and Jinyoung’s thoughtfulness was enough to make him cry.
“Wait, no. No—Jihoon, why are you crying? Do you not like the color? I can change—” Jinyoung stutters and leans forward to grab Jihoon’s hand.
Jihoon shakes his head and that urges Jinyoung in panic because Jihoon’s sobs were getting louder and this is the first time he’s ever encountered someone crying in front of him.
“I’m sorry, should I have gotten you something else? Please don’t cry.” Jinyoung now looks like he’s about to cry as well, clutching Jihoon’s hand tighter than before.
“No, it’s not that. You don’t get it, Jinyoung—do you?” Jihoon asks, sniffling out. The question didn’t come out angry, or frustrated but instead it was laced with Jihoon’s sweet voice, softer than Jinyoung remembered. “This is the first time i’ve gotten a present from anyone.”
To Jinyoung, one present may mean nothing but to Jihoon something just as simple as a lamp meant the entire world.
Jihoon’s still sniffling, using his free hand to wipe the tears away from his eyes. His face was red from crying and now there were tears laced in his long eyelashes. Jinyoung knew it was rude, but he couldn’t help but staring at male in front of him. It’s been months but he still oozed the same vulnerability Jinyoung sensed the day they first met.
He was taught that being vulnerable was to be weak. But, Jinyoung thought the opposite. He thought it was fascinating, how one person was able to put down all their walls so quickly—so easily. He himself struggles as he’s put in the position of being the heir of one of the wealthiest companies so how does a young male like Jihoon radiate vulnerability like if he wasn’t afraid of what was the worst to come?
There’s a pregnant silence before Jihoon squeezes Jinyoung’s hand that was still intertwined with his. He lets his thumb caress the gentle skin of the younger male affectionately.
Jinyoung thinks he’s whipped—no, probably more than that. But, he doesn’t want to admit it to himself.
“So, you do like it?” He asks carefully, watching the elder male look focus his attention towards him. He gets a smack on the shoulder from Jihoon in response, but also along with a loud laugh.
“No, I love it. Thank you. Thank you so much, Jinyoung. I’ll cherish it forever.”
Jinyoung should’ve seen it coming. There was signs everywhere, red flags that told him that something was going to go wrong. It started with accidentally coming across to his father on the phone, talking about their ‘profits’ again and how orphanages would benefit them.
He was starting to think that his father wasn’t the man he knew back then. That instead of a humble man that put his family first, people first, there was a man who put money in front of anything and anyone. Jinyoung wanted to talk to his father about it, he wanted more than anything to do just that but he knew he wouldn’t be able to have his way. He’s still reminded of the time in the car where he was told ‘Money is everything’ but Jinyoung doesn’t think so.
It was the night before their visit to the orphanage, two months after their previous one since there was more work to be done to the interior design of the building.
Jinyoung was in his bedroom in the middle of trying to beat a level on Candy Crush that he’s had trouble beating for the past few days when he hears his father scream on the phone. He flinches and rolls around in his bed before sitting up and walking towards his door, he opens it a little to hear the perfect amount of sound.
This wasn’t uncommon. The past few weeks were exactly like this situation. Jinyoung’s father would yell on the phone, and it would mostly about the ‘A New Beginning’ project that he was trying to build.
“I told you that we are going to sell the orphanage. I don’t care about the kids that are living there! Do you think i’ve ever cared about them? This was all to make profit. It’s all it ever was, all it ever will be. Arrange plans to dispose of that trash and make it into the hospital we spoke about in the last meeting. The next time we go to that place will be the last time, i’ll make sure of it.” His father yells onto phone, his voice aggravated.
The next time we go to that place will be the last time echoes in Jinyoung’s head.
That means the next time he’ll see Jihoon would be the last time. The last time he’ll see Jihoon’s smile, the last time he’ll hear Jihoon’s laugh, the last time he’d play with the teacups that the male lays out for them whenever he visits.
Jinyoung closes his door gently before sliding down and burying his face in his hands. He couldn’t let that happen, he wasn’t ready to let go of Jihoon—not yet.
Jihoon seems to notice the weight on his shoulders when he visits the next day. The male was staring at him, longer than he usually does. Not that Jinyoung was complaining.
“Is there something wrong?” Jihoon asks, pursing his lips. He pours the ‘tea’ into Jinyoung’s cup and hands it to him.
Jinyoung wants to tell him like he did last time about the multiple orphanages, about how he’s barely going to see Jinyoung anymore. But, somehow he doesn’t have the heart to—not because he doesn’t want to see the male said but because it was causing him to have a feeling that he can’t describe.
“Nope, just caught a stomach ache earlier. I’m still trying to shove it off.” Jinyoung smiles, lying through his teeth. Jihoon hesitates for a moment before nodding, returning the smile.
“We better make sure you’re well rested later then, right?” Jihoon says, pulling Jinyoung onto his bed. It was just as soft even if the bed sheets were different now. Instead of a beige, it was replaced with a light pink that Jinyoung brought to him earlier when he arrived.
That’s how Jinyoung ends up with Jihoon’s head against his chest, arm wrapped around his torso. He thinks something is tickling his nose and when he looks up, Jihoon’s bunny greets him with its fluffy tail.
“He always wants to cockblock us, doesn’t he?” Jinyoung chuckles, removing his hand that was cradling Jihoon’s head to grab the bunny. He places it near Jihoon’s face and he hears the elder male giggle.
“He’s not cockblocking, you dummy! He’s my lucky charm.” Jihoon looks up, teasing Jinyoung as he sticks out his tongue.
Jinyoung pouts. “I thought I was your lucky charm.”
“You are my other lucky charm. But my bunny, he’s a different one. I’ve always got to have him with me. It’s the last thing my mother gave me before our lives kind of turned, you know.” Jihoon pauses, looking down at the stuffed toy. “It’s kind of a reminder that there’s always kindness in the world, somewhere deep in there. No matter how awful a person is, there’s always that light in them. Kind of silly, but—”
“It’s not silly, don’t ever say your words are silly.” Jinyoung says, letting his fingers knit through Jihoon’s hair. It was soft and it smelled like his own cologne. Jihoon asked for Jinyoung’s cologne last time and somehow it became one of his favorite scents.
Jihoon doesn’t say anything and fiddles with the ears of his bunny. He continues to lay against Jinyoung’s chest underneath the covers and Jinyoung wishes that they were born into another world, one where Jinyoung wasn’t wealthy and Jihoon was in a happier place than he currently was in. But, he knew that it wasn’t possible—he was Bae Jinyoung and the other male was Park Jihoon after all. The universe was never one to bring them together.
“Hey, Jihoon hyung?” Jinyoung quietly says the male’s name.
“Hm?” Jihoon’s looking up at him with the widest eyes and Jinyoung thinks he wants to kiss him.
So he does just that. He leans in to kiss Jihoon on the lips and to his surprise, Jihoon was kissing back. Jihoon’s lips felt exactly what Jinyoung thought they would feel like, they were soft—a little chapped but Jinyoung wishes he could kiss Jihoon for eternity.
When they pulled away, there was a dusty hue similar to roses greeting both the apples of their cheeks.
“Thank you.” is what Jihoon whispers against his chest before he falls asleep into his slumber.
Jinyoung wakes up to his father pulling him out of Jihoon’s bed. He struggles and tries to pull away, but there was no use. His strength was nothing compared to his own father’s.
“Jinyoung, we’re going home.” His father sternly says, pulling him harder towards the door. Jinyoung stumbles on his own feet and looks towards Jihoon who was currently on the bed trying to figure out the situation he was in.
“Jinyoung?” Jihoon asks, rubbing at his eyes.
It was as if Jinyoung was sent backwards, to the same day where he gave Jihoon that lamp, one that had the male crying but this time was different. He was the one crying.
“Jihoon hyung!” Jinyoung screams out, still trying to fight against his father’s strength.
“We need to go now. Stop screaming, we need to get into the car before they take this place down.” Jinyoung’s father says, his tone aggravated like the one he used on the phone the night before.
“Jinyoung? What is he talking about?” Jihoon asks, starting to stand up. His eyebrows were furrowed and the light pink bed sheets were starting to fall from his bed.
“You! Stay where you are and don’t come near my son.” The CEO yells towards Jihoon who just clutches at the bunny that was currently pressed to his chest.
Jihoon wants to move, but he feels as if his feet wouldn’t let him.
“I’ll come back, I swear. I-I promise!” Jinyoung manages to breathe out, continuing to yell out before he’s pulled into his father’s arms, hoisting him across his shoulder.
When Jinyoung disappears from his bedroom entrance, Jihoon finds it in himself to start running towards the gate. But, somewhere inside of him knew it was too late when he heard the engine of the car running—he watches as Jinyoung slams his fists on the tinted window and starts to run faster.
Jihoon reaches the metal gate, and to his disappointment; there was no car. All there was left was a crowded house, and somehow the house felt emptier than it was before he met Jinyoung.
Jinyoung secretly comes to visit the house the following day, sneaking out of his room. He paid his butler half of his allowance to drive him towards Jihoon’s orphanage. It was a risk, he knew. But, he would take any risk for Jihoon.
When he arrived, he’s still surprised that the building was standing. Maybe his father was just spouting nonsense over the phone and maybe Jihoon was still there inside, waiting for him. That’s what they promised after all.
His butler, Minhyun, follows him into the building. He says it’s for safety reasons, which Jinyoung understands because this was the first time Minhyun has seen the house and it’s exterior still wasn’t at its best.
“Young master, if I may ask, are you sure this is the place?” Minhyun asks cautiously, scanning their surroundings. The walls seemed duller than they were the first Jinyoung came.
“I’m sure of it. I know the address by heart.” Jinyoung says, his eyes directed to the green grass that was cut short up to the roots.
There were no furniture to greet him, just the sound of the sink dripping droplets of water and mice running across the wooden floors. He gulps. So his father really did intend to tear down the entire orphanage to sell it for profit.
Automatically, his feet lead him to the door of Jihoon’s room. Though, it wasn’t like the same door he encountered the first day he met him. Instead, it was just a plain wooden door. One that had paint that barely covered the previous layer. He turns the brassy doorknob and holds his breath.
Jinyoung wishes he was back to a year ago when he met Jihoon. Where the elder greeted him with a smile that was full of sincerity, a shy smile that made even hearts like Jinyoung’s swell. Where the elder would invite him for tea as if it was the most casual thing in the world.
His hopes were gone when he’s met with an empty room. Well, an almost empty room. As Jinyoung begins to walk inside, leather shoes clacking against the flooring—he spots a stuffed bunny on the corner of the room. He realizes it was the one that Jihoon always kept with him, Jihoon’s lucky charm. He wants to bring himself to have expectations that somewhere out there, Jihoon was still waiting.
But, in his world, there were no more tea parties, no more laying in the freshly cut grass and most importantly—no more Jihoon.
He chuckles bitterly, letting the tears hit the scratchy wooden floor. He clutches his chest and finally comprehends the emotion he was longing to find the word for.
Heartache.