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The door slammed, rattling the walls and rousing Nick from his sleep. He blinked into the darkness, trying to place where he was. Pig and Stinky weren’t curled at his feet and the pillow felt rougher against his cheek than he was used to. Bland walls and boring art and almost total silence: a hotel then. He was no stranger to falling asleep at friends’ houses and in hotels around the world on holiday, but as he rubbed away the sleep from his eyes, he couldn’t for the life of him remember what he had done the night before or where the hell he was.
There was a grunt from the doorway and Nick rubbed at his eyes again because… Louis Tomlinson? Louis was taking off his shoes like he was planning on staying. And it didn’t appear that Harry was following Louis into the room. Nick lay back down and took another stab at remembering why there was any reason he’d be in a hotel room that Louis had access too. Or why he and Louis would be in the same location without Harry.
He gave his eyes one last scrub and sat back up, hoping to clear his hallucination.
Because last he remembered, he was at Harry’s house, having a late Christmas and New Year’s celebration since they hadn’t met up in December.
He briefly considered that Harry had roofied him and put him here as a joke… but dismissed it just as quickly. Though he couldn’t come up with anything more plausible.
Louis was still stood in the doorway, a tiny pout on his face as he tried to unstick the zipper on his hoodie. “Fucking hell. This fucking piece of shit—” With a stomp of his foot Louis pulled the hoodie over his head and then dropped it in a pile next to his shoes. His hair was stuck up in random tufts, and Nick thought there were some dark circles under his eyes—although that could be the product of some truly terrible low-lighting—and he was wearing some loose trackies that were sliding off his hips and showing off his Calvin Klein boxers.
Nick watched as Louis huffed in Nick’s direction, and then disappeared into the loo. He wasn’t sure why he expected more for some reason, but the lack of greeting grated his nerves.
Still utterly confused, Nick dropped his feet on the soft carpet and stepped out of the plush bed. He was in boxers, at least, which was a godsend since he slept in the nude at home—he wouldn’t let himself think about being naked with Louis in the same room. Nothing but full-scale embarrassment was bound to come out of that. Louis was all barbed wire and unscalable walls and the last thing Nick needed was to hand over free ammunition.
He couldn’t see any luggage lying about, but surely he had packed something to go to this hotel. In the wardrobe he found some of his clothes and some of Louis’ clothes hanging up—a suitcase neatly standing on one side of the wardrobe—and he was officially weirded out enough to sit back on the bed, propped up against the headboard with a mound of pillows, and pull the covers up to his chin. Whatever prank this was would be over once Louis finished up in the loo and came out to throw it all in Nick’s face.
He heard the tap turn on and off a few times and finally Nick called out, “Okay, Louis. Very funny. You can come out now.”
“I’ll be done in a minute. You know I have my routine.”
Nick didn’t know he had a routine. Louis had always seemed like more of a ‘fly by the seat of his pants when it came to any and all things’ guy. Nick was the routine guy and all of this was getting dangerously close to sending him into a full-blown panic attack.
Louis poked his head out of the bathroom, opened his mouth like he was going to say something, then shook his head and returned.
“Uh, okay?” Nick finally responded when it was clear Louis wasn’t in a hurry.
Nick snuggled back down in the bed, which was more comfortable than he wanted to admit, and closed his eyes. Maybe if he fell asleep he’d wake back up in his own room and then have a weird story to tell on the radio—with all names redacted, of course.
He didn’t fall back asleep; he was silly to even entertain that as an option when his brain was whirling as fast as it was. But just a few minutes later, Nick heard the squeak of the bathroom door opening and then the click of the light turning off, and Louis padding across the room.
“Are you pretending to sleep?” Louis asked.
Nick opened his eyes to the sight of a fresh-faced Louis standing next to the bed with one hand on his cocked hip. “No.” Louis frowned slightly. “Wasn’t. Was just resting my eyes. It’s arse o’clock in the morning.” Nick actually had no idea what time it was, but it certainly felt like the middle of the night.
“Whatever.” Louis rearranged his fringe with a flick of his wrist. Nick tried not to focus on the pale flat skin of Louis’ stomach, or the shallow indent of his belly button, or the spiky happy trail that looked to be growing back in after a wax. His cheeks heated as he tried and failed to look away from the perfection in his direct line of sight. He cursed Harry for never throwing a pool party and for making Nick have to see this up close and personal for the first time when he was ill-equipped to handle it on his own. Louis rolled his eyes. “Scootch over, bed hog.”
Nick looked up, ready to throw a barb back at Louis, but then Louis was moving again, bending slightly, and Nick’s eye caught the movement and the words died on his tongue. Louis pulled off his Calvins and in the moment before he slid into the bed—the bed Nick was currently occupying—Nick caught sight of Louis’ dick: soft, the prettiest shade of pink he had ever seen, and perfectly proportioned to the rest of him. Nick turned violently, taking the covers with him, and he searched desperately for his inhaler on the table next to him. He couldn’t breathe. This was entirely Too Much. And of fucking course his inhaler wasn’t where he was expecting because he was in a mystery hotel where nothing made sense.
He sucked in a shallow breath.
“Breathe. Baby, come on, follow me, breathe.” Louis’ voice was a gentle wave that washed over him.
Louis took Nick’s left hand and placed it on his chest, so Nick could follow along with his inhales and exhales. It worked quickly and within moments Nick could breathe again.
“You okay?” Louis asked.
Nick nodded.
Louis held Nick’s face between his hands. “Seriously though, what’s going on? You haven’t had one of those in ages.”
“Dunno, really.” Nick stalled, not quite able to bring himself to admit out loud that such a casual look at Louis’ penis could send him in a tailspin. “Feeling a bit peaky all day, to be honest.”
“Hmm…” Louis gave him a shrewd look. “Maybe you were a little pale earlier.”
“Can we maybe just forget about it? Pretend it never happened?” It would be great if the heat in his cheeks could just… chill for a moment.
“Now you’re being suspicious, normally you whinge on about it, seeking for sympathy for days.”
Nick shrugged. “’M just tired, I guess.”
“Right. Okay,” Louis said. He gave Nick another one of those appraising looks that made Nick feel flayed. “So let’s just go to bed and we’ll ignore today and hopefully tomorrow will be better.”
Nick didn’t say that hopefully they’d be back to hating each other when they woke up. Or, more accurately, that Louis hated him and Nick was weirdly attracted to it. What he wanted more than anything was for their dynamic to go back to what he was used to so Nick knew where he stood.
“Sleep sounds… wonderful, actually,” Nick said, smoothing the covers back across the bed. They lay down, Nick flat on his back, staring up at the ceiling and trying to take up as little space as possible since Louis was still lying next to him as though being naked around each other were a normal occurrence.
Louis snuggled up right next to him though, forcing himself between Nick’s arm and Nick’s body, placing his head on Nick’s shoulder and casually tossing his arm and leg across Nick’s body. His penis was pressed tight against Nick’s hip and never had Nick been more grateful for the odd occurance of his own boxers in bed. Not that he was a prude, or historically shied away from penises in his general area, but it was Louis’! Right there! And there was a good chance Nick might accidentally brush against it and then spontaneously combust! So yeah, boxers were an excellent idea that past-him had so that there was no penis-on-skin contact, as per the previously thought of spontaneously combusting.
Nick tried to keep his breathing nice and steady so Louis wouldn’t know anything was amiss. He knew Louis was a good actor, but not good enough to pull this off: he was clearly nonplussed about Nick being in his bed.
With a sigh Louis flipped over, curling his back against Nick’s side. After a few more minutes and another sigh, Louis was on his back next to Nick. On the third sigh and third position Nick couldn’t take it anymore.
“You okay?” he asked.
Nick felt Louis shrug.
“Wanna talk about it?” he pried.
“Not really much to say, is there? It just sucks sometimes.”
Nick hummed. “Still though, could be good to get it out, yeah? At least it won’t be stuck in your head.”
“I’m going to sound like such a whiny little popstar. Oh woe is me, bitching and complaining in this four-star hotel.”
“Four stars? Really? I hadn’t noticed.”
“I hate you.” There was the Louis Nick knew, it settled him to know he was still in there somewhere. “Know how much you love this one, yeah? Asked specifically for it.”
“Aren’t you just a gem. Now spill. What’s going on.”
Louis shrugged again, and inched closer to Nick. He rubbed his nose along Nick’s shoulder, so Nick opened his arm and let Louis duck back under. “Missed Dot’s and Ernie’s school play today, didn’t I?”
“Oh.”
“And I know this job has a shelf-life—”
“Hey!” Nick got defensive over that when Harry said it too. Sometimes that was true, but Nick wasn’t above citing the Backstreet Boys and their most recent sold out tour as needed.
“It’s true. And I know there will be more plays…”
“Still, they’re only young once. Still sucks that you had to miss it.” Nick had an inexplicable urge to kiss away the wrinkle between Louis’ eyes.
“And it just feels like we’ve been on tour forever, you know? I love it, you know how much I love it, I’m not trying to complain—”
“You’re allowed to—”
Louis shrunk in on himself. “But I’m just really really ready to go home now. The tour is too long and they FaceTime whenever they can, but I feel like I’m missing so much.”
Nick scooped him up in a hug as best he could. He was honestly shit at giving friends advice—he supposed at this point Louis could be considered a friend—and he never knew why they came to him when he felt like he mostly just did the equivalent of patting them on the head and saying ‘there there.’
Louis snuffled a moment then gave Nick’s bare, hairy chest a kiss. Nick had a brief pang of embarrassment at his less-than popstar-esque physique, but Louis didn’t seem to mind, having then rubbed his cheek against his nonexistent pecs.
“Sorry to be a downer.”
“Oh my god, Louis! You’re fine. Stop apologising. I complain about things that are far less shit every day. You’re allowed to be sad about your family.”
Louis tweaked his nipple. “You do have a point there, about your complaints.”
“Not sure I should be the base reference for you, but yeah, sure. As long as you’re not complaining as much as I am you’re all good.”
“Wanker,” Louis said softly. Nick laughed quietly. “It helps though,” Louis continued, “you being here. Helps a whole lot. So thanks, for like, showing up on short notice.”
“Anytime, love.” The funny thing was, Nick was pretty sure he meant it.
Louis snuggled close again and wrapped himself around Nick like an octopus. Nick was acutely aware of Louis’ nakedness again; and he hoped he was walking the right side of the line when it came to rubbing his back and being there for him, and didn’t cross into creepy dude overstepping because he was finding it hard to think when there was so much skin to explore.
There had been this one time, felt like ages ago, when Harry had cornered Nick at one of his infamous parties. Harry had started in on Louis’ most recent breakup, how hard he was taking it, how Louis always ended up with these boys who didn’t appreciate him. And how Louis had been in this slump, how he was second-guessing everything. Nick hadn’t been sure why Harry was telling him; it was far too personal and Nick didn’t have the slightest bit of sympathy for the mouthy brat. But then Harry had eventually gotten around to his point: suggesting that Nick and Louis should hook up—just a one night stand. To help Louis get back on the horse, so to speak, with someone who was deserving, if only for the night. Nick had been slightly insulted that Harry thought he’d be interested and politely declined the odd offer.
Nick wondered if he had made a mistake.
“Hey, Nick?” Louis asked.
Nick’s hand stilled. “Yeah?”
“I know you’re only here for a night, but is it okay if we don’t, uh, do anything?”
“Huh?”
“Sex,” Louis huffed out against his chest. “I’m just not in the mood.”
“Oh! Yeah, of course, whatever you want.” Again, Nick realised that was probably closer to the truth than he wanted to admit. At this moment he was willing to give Louis whatever he asked for—a scary proposition considering it was Louis, a total terror, he was thinking about. “I’m okay, just holding you.”
“How’d I get so lucky?”
The line was so cheesy Nick would normally go running for the hills. This time though, he just held on tighter and stopped himself from arguing that he actually was the lucky one.
The thought quieted his mind enough that he could focus on Louis’ shallow breaths and eventually Louis’ quiet snores and then Nick’s eyelids were getting heavier and his blinks slower and then he fell into the most comfortable sleep he could ever remember.
The next time Nick awoke, it was in a much more familiar setting—Harry’s sofa. He pulled the throw tight under his chin and took his time waking up. It was quiet, so Harry was probably out, though there was the possibility he was sleeping off his hangover instead of exercising it out. Nick’s own head felt heavy and his stomach gurgled dangerously. He kept his eyes closed as he tried to guess what time it might be.
Eventually he stretched, pointing his toes against the armrest on one side and elongating his arms above the other armrest. His back twinged slightly but there was nothing but relief once his blood got flowing.
He blinked at Harry’s ceiling a few times before rolling over. He blinked a few times on his side as well, this time at Louis Tomlinson, sat criss-crossed on the ottoman only a foot or so away.
Louis’ usual scowl was missing and in its place was a look of mild discomfort. The fact that Louis was there at all had Nick wondering if he did, somehow, transport to another dimension where he and Louis were friends.
“Harry’s not home,” Louis said.
“Oh. Okay then,” Nick replied. “Is that your way of kicking me out? Even though this isn’t your house?” Nick was in no rush to get up.
Louis squinted his eyes in a way that was probably meant to be menacing and instead was slightly cute. Christ, he needed to lay off the booze. Maybe next month he’d do a detox.
“You dream about me a lot?” Louis asked.
“I haven’t the slightest—”
“You talk in your sleep.”
Nick’s whole body warmed a few degrees, and he was almost certainly sweating. “Liar.” He was fairly certain that he didn’t. Clearly Fifi or Alexa or George or anyone else would’ve brought this to attention before Louis.
Louis shrugged, then smirked and flicked his fringe off his forehead with a jerk of his head.
“So you’re not denying it.”
Nick ran his fingers through his fallen quiff. His hair was probably a total tip. “What are you talking about, Tomlinson?”
“All morning it’s been ‘Louis this’ and ‘Louis that’ that you’ve been muttering. The,” Louis pitched his voice higher, “‘I’m the luckiest’ combined with that morning wood was honestly too much. I started throwing things at you to wake you up.”
“You didn’t.” Nick fluffed the blanket by his crotch, he didn’t currently have a problem, but Louis bringing any more attention to his dick and he wouldn’t have any control over the situation.
Louis laughed. “Still not denying it.”
Nick groaned. Louis was worse than Pig with a bone; he wasn’t going to drop it. Nick wasn’t going to confirm it.
There was a bit of a staring contest. Nick may have been studying Louis’ eye color instead of actively appearing aggressive. Louis just looked at him blankly. He had perfected the closed-off ‘not even a hint of what’s going on behind those eyes’ look.
Nick caved first.
“So what if I did.”
“Knew it,” Louis said gleefully.
“Not like I can control my dreams,” Nick pouted.
Louis’ mirth dropped. “Yeah, suppose you wouldn’t be dreaming of me on purpose, would you. Would be more of a nightmare.”
Nick felt like he was still on uneven footing. Louis was all over the place and he couldn’t pin down what he was thinking. Nick liked a challenge.
“You’re not easy on yourself, are you?” Nick asked. He expected the silence he got in return. “I’m hungover and tired and too fucking nervy to sit here by myself,” he finally went with. “Tell me a story.”
“You’re the one on the radio every morning. Shouldn’t you have a good one to tell me?”
“Nah, gotta save my best stuff for my faithful listeners. Besides, you probably already know all my good Harry stories.” Nick adjusted himself again, lying back looking up at the ceiling. “Tell me about Dot and Ernie. How old are they now?” He turned his head to see Louis’ reaction.
“What?” Louis’ face goes all stony and he’s got his hands propped on his knees like he’s ready to fight someone who just insulted the Donny Rovers.
“Your siblings? The little ones? Or maybe not so little now? I’m rubbish with those details.” Nick has an awful feeling that he overstepped somehow.
“Why do you care?”
“Like kids, don’t I?” Maybe Louis would care to hear about his gaggle of godkids, someday, if they survived this conversation.
“But you’ve never cared in the past.”
“Never gave me a chance. This is more words than you’ve ever said to me in the years that I’ve known you.”
Louis opened his mouth like he was going to argue, then closed it again. “Oh.”
“All walls and escape routes, you.”
“Right. Well,” Louis broke into a smile that Nick was pretty sure he couldn’t control, “they’re brilliant actually. Reading already, way before I was, I’m sure. And just curious about everything. Really, couldn’t be prouder of them than if they were my own.” He did look pretty chuffed about them, eyes sparkling and that contagious grin that gets Nick everytime… normally from across the room, but up close was even more powerful.
There had been an embarrassing moment about two years prior where Harry had caught Nick doing a bit of social media stalking. No one needed to know that Nick had alerts set up for Louis’ instagram; and besides, he was a morning radio DJ, he needed to keep abreast with all things pop culture. But apparently Nick had a dopey smile on his face while looking at the picture of Louis and his brother with huge open mouth smiles. It had been pure joy. Nick would’ve been a monster for not smiling when it popped open on his phone. The ribbing Harry had given him after was nothing like pure joy. It had taken him ages to convince Harry that, honestly, he didn’t have a thing for Louis, and certainly not a thing with Louis and children. Thinking about it, Nick couldn’t be sure that he ever totally convinced Harry.
Nick couldn’t quite wipe the smile from his face. He knew this was a risk, knew there was a good chance all the progress he’d made in the fifteen minutes of chatting this morning could be shot to hell, but he felt lucky, and like maybe that dream was a preminion of the future he could have if he just took a chance. “Hey, Lou?”
“The other twins are pretty brilliant too. Got some business genes or something in them; already launched this accessory business, emojis for your hair. They’ll probably end up loaded, won’t be needing to support those two.” Louis laughed quietly. “Sorry, once you get me started, hard to stop.”
“Quite like it.”
“Yeah?”
Nick needed to get a hold of himself. He shook the smile off his face while looking at Louis’ genuinely sparkling eyes, until the smile dropped off Louis’ face too. For a long moment they allowed themselves to look.
“Nick?” Louis asked.
“That’s my name.” Nick laughed at his lame joke.
“Can I ask you something?”
Nick shrugged. “Already did, love. But you know me, an open book.”
“Yeah, right.” Louis snorted. “If I’m out of line, just smack me or something, yeah? But I just never… I don’t quite get it. You never seem to be in a long term relationship?”
“Ouch.”
Louis clenched his teeth. “I just mean… you’re an alright lad. Must have like… the world is your oyster… or whatever. You’re you. So, is that something you’re not interested in?”
Nick thought it was maybe the most awkward thing anyone had ever said to him. “Heavy conversation while the sun’s still rising, innit?”
“Sorry. Yeah. Sorry. Nevermind. Just, uh, forget I said anything.”
“No, it’s not… you’re fine. It’s an alright question. Answer’s a bit embarrassing though. ’Cause no one ever sticks around.” Nick shrugged. Maybe not the whole truth, but not exactly wrong either.
“Oh.” Louis bit his lip. “Prats,” he added almost as a whisper.
Nick felt his blush return.
“Lou?”
Louis hummed.
“Yeah. Um. What would you say if I asked you out sometime? Maybe continue this conversation when I don’t feel like death, after I’ve showered maybe? Dinner and drinks?”
“You don’t like me, though.” Louis’ continued to chew on his lower lip, like he was working out a problem.
“I do, actually. Have liked you for some time.”
“I’m a challenge. Everyone says so. Hard nut to crack.”
“Like a puzzle, don’t I? Come on, give me a chance. Harry seems to think I’m okay.”
Louis rolled his eyes. “Harry thinks the sun shines out your arse.”
It was Nick’s turn to laugh. “You’ll have to find out for yourself.”
“Cheeky.”
“What do you say?”
“Dinner. Drinks. No arses involved. I’ll give you one chance, Grimshaw.”
Nick did an involuntary fist punch. “Alright.” He pat his pockets. “Don’t know where my phone is now, but promise I’ll get your number from Harry and give you a call to set it all up. Dinner and drinks I can do. No funny business, I promise.”
Louis stood up, digging his keys out of his front pocket. “Not on the first date. We’ll see about the second.”
Nick smiled, he was up for the challenge.
“Feel better. You look a bit green at the moment. Water and cheeseburgers, that’s my recommendation.”
“Ha! Sounds perfectly actually. Now get out of here so I can wallow in peace.”
Louis hesitated for a moment, then turned around. “What happened in your dream?”
Nick buried his head in his hands. He couldn’t get the image of Dream Louis’ dick out of his head. “Second date material, for sure.”
Louis barked out a laugh. “Right. Okay then. See you later, Nick.”
Nick watched Louis walk away, in his perfectly fitted trousers. He honestly had no idea how that all came to be, but he was glad it did.