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Can't Imagine Me Without You

Summary:

After witnesses a colleague laying in a critical state, Midoriya can't help but worry about what would happen if it were Bakugou. If Bakugou left him far too early in their lives. The answer would be to move on, right? But to go on without the one you love...

During Midoriya's endless worries, Bakugou shares his feelings about if that actually were to happen: “If I die and you’re already in some other person’s pants by the end of that same fucking day, I would come back to life just to beat your shitty ass.”

Notes:

This was written a while back, but I thought why not post now? Angsty hurt/comfort thoughts all centered around one line I thought Kacchan would say that cracked me up. First BakuDeku thing I've ever written!

@robogill edited this chapter also a while back hehe

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Two o’clock in the morning is the time for sleep. The streets outside were dead, apartment neighbors seemed nonexistent, the air was silent. Yet Midoriya couldn’t keep his eyes shut.

Midoriya tossed and turned in his shared bed. After a hard day of hero work, he should’ve been able to promptly pass out the second he hit the bed. That was typically the case. However, work that day ended differently. Badly. It wasn’t anything new to come back with some injuries after dealing with villains. That was a common occurrence. What wasn’t, was getting hurt to the point of being in critical condition.

On the job, one of the heroes Midoriya was working with sustained a severe injury. She had to be taken to the hospital immediately, so Midoriya wasn’t able to see the damage until after the mission. When he’d rushed to the hospital with some other heroes, he found the injured hero bandaged up, unconscious, and in a risky state.

Despite no one knowing when or if the unconscious hero would awake, Midoriya stayed by her side, even after the others had sullenly left. He’d stayed along enough to see the other’s fiancé running in, tears streaming down his face. The man was just an ordinary office worker, stricken with anguish with how the love of his life was fighting for hers and he couldn’t do anything about it.

The sight was a heavier blow to Midoriya than all the punches he had taken just hours before combined and multiplied by a thousand. Especially with the words the fiancé spoke that stuck to Midoriya, keeping him awake deep into the night.

I love you. Please don’t go. I can’t go on without your beautiful smile in every day of my life.

Midoriya turned once more, seeing the one who’d been in every day of his own life. Or, at least the back of him, breath steadily rising and falling.

Midoriya propped himself up on his elbow. “Kacchan,” he whispered. Nothing. A little louder than before, “Kacchan! You awake?”

Bakugou began groaning in clear irritation. He was awake now, even though be barely uncurled himself from sleep.

“Deku. Why the fuck. Am I awake. At 2:07 in the fucking morning?”

Midoriya paid no mind to Bakugou’s irritation.

“Kacchan, what happens if… if during some fight with a villain, or even some crazy accident, one of us… doesn’t make it out?”

Bakugou didn’t respond. He was silent. But he did shift his head, indicating he was still listening.

“That means we’d have to move on, right?” Midoriya sullenly asked. His eyes fell to his pillow, unable to look at Bakugou, even if his back was to him. “Would that… even be okay?”

Midoriya’s eyes went back up as Bakugou began shifting more. They were face to face now, Bakugou’s eyes narrowed. And in a deadpan:

“You want me to drop dead so you can find some other person to be with?”

“No!” Midoriya shrieked.

Bakugou didn’t even flinch.

“Just—! Just hypothetically speaking…?”

Bakugou stared back for a moment before letting out sigh. He plopped onto his back from his prior mirrored position. His eyes fell shut with another deep breath. “If I die and you’re already in some other person’s pants by the end of that same fucking day, I would come back to life just to beat your shitty ass.”

“Kacchan! I’m serious!” Midoriya whined.

Bakugou popped an eye open, side-eyeing the other. “So am I.”

Upon seeing Midoriya’s downcast look, Bakugou let out another sigh. He turned to face him again. “Is this about what happened at the hospital?”

Midoriya bit the inside of his lip, head turning to avoid the other’s gaze.

Knowing he wouldn’t get an answer, Bakugou brought his hand up to Midoriya’s cheek. Gently, he turned his head back so they were facing each other once more. Bakugou did have a very soft and caring side to him hidden deep under all the loud rage and explosions, but Midoriya always doubted anyone would ever believe him if he said anything. Also doubted Bakugou would admit to it.

“Izuku,” Bakugou started. He very rarely ever called Midoriya by his actual name. Only in very distressing times. Like this one, he seemed to deem. “I can guarantee you neither of us are dying anytime soon.”

Midoriya didn’t buy it. “You can’t guarantee something like that, Kacchan.”

“Fuck you. When have I ever been wrong?” Bakugou responded, slightly as a joke to ease Midoriya’s mood. Slightly. And it worked, Midoriya cracking a silent laugh. “Seriously though. We’re both top heroes. We’ve made it through tons of shit, even as fucked-up teenagers. You don’t need to worry about any of that shit until we’re Recovery Girl’s age or something. Actually, even then, don’t worry about that shit.”

With everything Bakugou said, Midoriya finally started to ease up. However, Bakugou knew he wasn’t all okay yet.

“But, in that .0000000001 percentage chance, I’m talking microscopic, Deku—”

“Alright, I get it—”

“Bitch, don’t interrupt me.”

Midoriya had trouble holding down his laughter, but Bakugou continued on.

“In that near nonexistent number percentage chance…”

A pause as Bakugou thought for a moment.

“…I’m dead for some shitty reason—” Bakugou had a really good feeling him dying was what was bothering Midoriya. “—then, I wouldn’t want you to dwell excessively over it or some shit. Like, you do that whenever something’s hella ‘serious.’ It’s fucking annoying sometimes.”

Midoriya rolled his eyes, though still smiling.

“And, yeah, just move on… I’d…” Now it was Bakugou’s turn to be unable to look Midoriya in the eye. He sank down a bit under their blanket, cheeks warming up. “…want you… to be happy… or some shit.” Bakugou’s words were in a near mutter, but Midoriya heard them loud and clear.

“Kaccha—”

Bakugou yanked the sheet passed his shoulders as he turned his back to Midoriya.

“Shut up. Good night.”

Midoriya’s smile grew as he looked heartwarmingly at Bakugou despite being given the cold shoulder. He wrapped his arms around Bakugou’s waist, lying close. “I love you.”

Bakugou’s shoulders went tense, somewhat embarrassed. Midoriya knew he felt the same regardless. “…Next time you wake me up in the middle of the night for some stupid ass reason, I’m blasting you out of this bed and you’re sleeping on the couch.”

“Yes, yes.”

“I fucking mean it, Deku.”

“Mmhmm.”

Finally, Midoriya was calm with everything. Feeling alright again. Or, almost alright.

“…Hey, Kacchan?”

“What the fuck did I just say?”

“But you haven’t fallen asleep yet, so it doesn’t count!”

Bakugou’s back was still to him, but Midoriya could still tell he was rolling his eyes. Even so, Bakugou turned back around so they were facing each other again. He gave Midoriya a chaste kiss before curling up against him.

“Better?”

Midoriya smiled, nodding his head. He really loved how they could read each other, not even needing to ask something out loud for the other to answer.

“Great. Now sleep, you fucking baby.”

“Mmhmm…”

“Seriously, 2:07 in the goddamn fucking morning. 2:20 now.”

“I’m sorry…”

“Yeah, you fucking better be.”

Slowly, their halfhearted quarrel died down to mumbles. Soon after, they were finally blissfully asleep.

 

 

 

The very next morning, the first thing Midoriya did—other than make breakfast for Bakugou while he slept in because he really deserved it after last night—was head to the hospital. His worry for his future might be out of his mind for now, but that didn’t mean the worry for the hero bedridden in the hospital went away.

Midoriya quickly sped down the hall of the hospital, nearing the room he was in before. When he saw it coming into sight, he noticed the door was open. He slowed his pace to a stop, overhearing a familiar laugh. Peeking in through the door, Midoriya’s worries melted from the sight.

“Deku!”

The hero. She was awake and alright.

“Inkline, are you alright?” Midoriya asked, coming in hesitantly. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help you.”

The pro-hero, Inkline, waved him off. “Deku, there is nothing you need to be sorry for. And I’m doing fine. Oh, this is my fiancé by the way. Akimaru Kouji.”

Midoriya turned his attention to Inkline’s fiancé. The same guy from last night.

“Deku…?” Akimaru repeated under his breath before his eyes popped wide open. “Oh my goodness! Thank you for being here last night with Mari—my gosh I bawled in front of one of the top heroes! I’m so sorry you had to see that! Ahhh! I didn’t even knowledge you yesterday! I’m so sorry!”

“No, no, no, don’t worry about it.”

Midoriya tried to reassure Akimaru that he was fine and everything, but the other man kept going on and on. Until Inkline, aka Mari, cut in.

“Kouji!” Mari yelled, freezing not only her fiancé but Midoriya as well. Her stern voice turned sweet. “You’re rambling again, sweetie. Breathe.”

Akimaru took deep breaths before finally calming down. He turned back to Midoriya, who was still rather shaken. “I’m sorry. I tend to over worry and go on and on according to Mari—”

“Everyone.”

“According to everyone,” Akimaru corrected. “Especially when it comes to Mari.”

“Sap,” Mari called from the bed. Akimaru turned to her with a pout. Midoriya couldn’t help chuckling.

“It’s because I love you. If you didn’t wake up, I don’t know what I’d do.”

“Oh please. You’d move on in a blink of an eye.”

“That’s not true!”

Mari giggled. “Better not be. If you get with another woman the second I die, I’d come back just to kick your sorry behind. Melt both your faces off with toxic ink.”

Midoriya had a serious case of déjà vu. At least Bakugou was willing to not include his Quirk…

The three had a nice time with small talk after the threat of coming back undead, and soon it was time for Midoriya to head out.

Midoriya checked the time on his phone the moment he stepped out the hospital. Almost 11 am. Bakugou should be up. And a text from said person popping up confirmed Midoriya’s suspicion.

One word. ‘Hey

Midoriya smiled. That one word was Bakugou-language, asking if he was alright. He probably knew he’d gone to the hospital.

Midoriya responded back. ‘Morning Kacchan! <3

Random heart, code ‘I’m alright.’

Another text alert. ‘Fucking sap.’

Midoriya couldn’t help chuckling again. He then continued reading the message after reading Bakugou’s version of ‘good to hear.’

Out of sriracha

Midoriya texted back. ‘I’ll grab some on the way back’ And for the heck of it, he added a billion hearts at the end.

Not a moment later, ‘SAAAAPPPPPPPPPPP’ plus Bakugou’s self-made emoticon of flipping him off, ‘(cb=-=)cb

Midoriya laughed out loud at that. How could he not have this every day of his life?

Notes:

It was the “If I die and you’re already in some other person’s pants by the end of that same fucking day, I would come back to life just to beat your shitty ass," line the i thought of that always cracks me up >w<

Comments, kudos, and all super loved and appreciated!!

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