Work Text:
It's in every breath that Yoongi takes, every step that draws him closer and closer to parting from the man by his side. Every splash of the puddles scattered across the uneven pavement, every click of his heels against the slick sidewalk.
He fights the urge to look up, to glance for even the slightest second without being prompted for whatever reason.
Instead, he waits.
Yoongi is used to waiting. He’s waited for so many things, has been struck with a constant string of disappointment after disappointment, time and time again. None of it really matters in the end, really – it’s all temporary.
Maybe this will be temporary, too.
It’s what he tells himself when he accidentally steps too far ahead, leaving the shield of the umbrella protecting them both – he hears Seokjin clear his throat and halts in his steps before a familiar set of double doors.
“We’re here,” Seokjin echoes.
Yoongi finally, finally turns and raises his eyes. Seokjin’s sniffing, shivering somewhat from the frigid air amidst the onslaught of rain. Yoongi watches Seokjin’s breath condense into soft puffs of warmth, and feels a strange sudden urge to reach out and catch the rising steam before it manages to slip through his fingers and disappear altogether.
“It’s freezing cold, you should head back in now,” Seokjin says. He smiles warmly before turning his feet in the opposite direction, back down the path they’d walked together. “I’ll see you tomorrow –“
“Wait!” Yoongi starts. Something akin to panic floods through his veins; his outstretched hand blurs by the edges of his vision and his mouth dries instantly. The curious look that seokjin sends his way does nothing to relieve the frantic hammering in his chest.
Say it.
“I –“
Say it, now.
“Yoongi?”
Now.
Now.
Now, now, now.
The lump in his throat is impossible to swallow down.
A cast of warmth envelops the top of Yoongi’s head. Seokjin’s right palm, he guesses – and sure enough, he raises his gaze to catch sight of Seokjin’s other hand wrapped firm around the handle of his umbrella, crooked fingers and all. It’s a familiar sight that never fails to bring yoongi comfort, unlike the foreign glint of something sleek and silver resting against Seokjin’s ring finger, something –
“I know you’ve been busy,” Seokjin says. Yoongi’s eyes snap back to his face and watch as he gnaws on his lower lip for a split second. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for you to move all your other events around like this – I want to remind you, we would love to have you there, but if it’s too much trouble for you to attend –“
“It’s fine,” Yoongi chokes out. “Don’t worry about it. I already…I already took care of everything.”
Seokjin sighs and smiles. “You’ve always been so kind, Yoongi. Always. Even back then, after..."
Yoongi holds his breath.
Seokjin stops, blinks, and shakes his head, as if to will the thought away.
Too far.
“Namjoon’s really excited to have you there, you know? I mean, I am, too. But ever since he even remotely considered having a best man at our wedding, you were the first and only person he thought of. He wouldn't accept anyone else.”
Yoongi nods mutely.
“We’re really grateful to have you in our lives. Don’t forget that, okay? Now, you should really head inside and get some rest, I'm serious. It’s pouring.”
♪
Once Yoongi’s returned to the warmth of his own room and nestled under a thick layer of blankets, he eyes the lowest drawer of his dresser for what feels like forever. His glare is almost challenging when he briefly catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror on the wall: it's entirely at odds with the way his feet drag across the sleek tiling of the floor before he nears the stack of cabinets across from his bed.
He tugs on the knob of the drawer and pushes aside layers upon layers of shirts before bumping his palm against the soft velvet case, brushing off a thin film of dust before pulling the box open.
What was I to you?
Yoongi rubs his thumb gingerly against the engravement on inside of the wedding band and wonders, briefly, how the rose gold would have fit along the curve of Seokjin’s ring finger, as opposed to Namjoon’s choice of silver.
I guess I'll never find out.