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Both Holt and Terry filter out within the first couple of hours. They have spouses to go home to, Jake realises. A wife, a husband. They don’t say it, but he knows that’s why they’re leaving.
Amy watches him from her booth with the others, she can’t even see his face, but his hunched shoulders and slouched back convey to her the sadness that must be on his face.
“Hey,” she murmurs softly to him, walking and gently touching a hand to his back.
He jerks at her touch, not out of disgust, but of surprise. She sits down on the stool next to him, previously occupied by Holt.
“Oh,” he says, processing who it is, “hi.”
She smiles sympathetically. “Hi.”
He takes another drink, and they sit in silence for a moment.
“I heard what happened,” she finally says.
“Figures,” he replies, not looking at her, and finishing his glass, tipping his head back.
“I’m sorry,” Amy says. “It sucks.”
He looks at her. “Yeah,” he nods, “sucks.”
“Suuuucks,” she drawls, and he laughs.
“Suuuuuucks,” he says in a deep voice.
“Suuuuuuuuuuucks!” she mimics his tone.
“Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks!”
“Suuuuuuuuuuuuucks!”
Soon they’re laughing too much to continue, and Jake can’t help but beam at her - she really seems to glow when she laughs - but then that pang of ‘ Sophia dumped you and you’re gonna be lonely forever ’ hits him, and he looks away from Amy and motions to the bartender for another drink.
He drinks it gratefully, and Amy notices the shift in the mood.
“I really am sorry,” she tells him gently.
“Well that makes two of us.” he responds, downing the drink.
“Getting dumped is seriously the worst,” she comments.
“Good thing you were the one who dumped Teddy then,” he jokes, and Amy hides her face in her hands.
“God, don’t remind me! That was… that was something awful.” she groans.
He laughs, but it’s emptier, sadder. “Y’know I told her I loved her tonight?” he says after a pause, feeling the need to tell someone. “Three times.”
Amy stares at him for a moment, now going through her own array of emotions, namely jealousy (which she is not proud of), but mostly anger. Anger that Sophia could be loved by this wonderful man in front of her and throw him away so easily.
“Jesus,” Amy finally says, “I… I didn't know that. And then… she just dumped you?”
Jake nods, and goes to drink from his empty glass.
“God, I knew lawyers were bad but I didn’t know they were that bad.” Amy mutters, and Jake snorts into his glass; Amy smiles, proud of herself.
“Shoulda known, huh?” Jake murmurs.
“You couldn’t have.” Amy says. “And Jake,” she adds, grabbing ahold of his forearm, and squeezing gently, “she didn’t deserve you, okay? You’re… so wonderful, and funny, and smart, and kind. You’re so kind and caring and loving. You can’t blame yourself.”
Jake stares wondrously at her, and Amy feels her cheeks redden. She quickly withdraws her hand and clears her throat.
“Thanks, Ames,” he smiles softly.
She can still feel heat in her cheeks. “Well it’s- it’s the truth.”
“Did you ever… did you ever tell Teddy you loved him?”
This question catches Amy off guard. “Well, I mean, it was kinda of complicated, because, um…” she trails off and gestures at Jake.
“Of me?” he prompts.
“Yeah, after you left, y’know, I was all over the place, and I didn’t talk to Teddy, didn’t even see him. Avoided him for almost two weeks. And then he turns up at my apartment and professed his love for me.” Jake raises his eyebrows, and Amy laughs ever-so-slightly. “Yeah, I know, but… it was nice to feel wanted.”
“So you said it back?” Jake asks.
Amy shakes her head. “No, not then, later. In fact, it was a couple of weeks before you came back. And I think… I think I did love him. I did. He was good to me. The relationship was secure, comfortable. It was good, for the most part.” Amy looks at Jake. “But it’s not how I wanted love to be.”
Jake nods, looking at her. “You wanted it to be more,” he says, uncharacteristically wise.
She almost smiles. “Yeah, I did.”
They look at each other for a moment, and it’s a moment of shared sadness, shared desire for more.
They get two more drinks and raise them.
“To being good, lonely cops,” Jake says.
“Well, we can’t be lonely if we’ve got each other.”
Jake smiles. “Good point, Ames, good point.”
They cheers and drink.
