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Derek was never truly meant to be an alpha.
His sister or even Peter were more suited for the role more than he was. He was born to be a beta born to take orders from someone with a higher power, born to fall into line like other members of a pack.
It was the reason he wasn't as upset as he should have been when he gave up the power to save Cora. It was just too much...giving orders making others fall in line when he was he in the same position as the betas only months ago, he couldn't handle it and it was almost a relief when the power vanished.
He was meant to follow not lead when it was revealed that Scott was the true alpha he couldn't have been more pleased. Scott although reckless and had his head almost completely shoved up Allison’s ass would be a capable alpha.
Every alpha however needed an anchor in order to keep a clear head.
And before they all knew it that anchor was gone Derek knew what Scott was probably feeling. He knew the loss of someone you loved more than anything, to have them by your side one minute then gone the next and being unable to stop it.
So he couldn't really be blamed for wanting to check on him as soon as he heard the news from Stiles. Granted it probably wasn't the best to visit him so soon as the alpha’s inner wolf was probably enraged at the loss but he knew that it was better to have unwanted company than grief alone.
He snuck in through the window the scent of stress and agony filling his nostrils the moment his feet touched the floor.
“Scott?” Derek called softly as he gazed around the dark room the only source of light was the small streams of moonlight.
“Go away…” a slightly muffled voice replied and for a moment the beta considered it. “Are you alright?” He whispered instead before he mentally kicked himself, he just watched the love of his life die in his arms of course he wasn't alright.
He heard a slight shuffling before his back was slammed against a wall and red eyes glared down at him, “I said leave me alone” Scott growled Derek bit his bottom lip before he shook his head slowly.
Normally he wouldn't dare go against a alpha but this was different…
“You shouldn't be left alone like this...I know how you feel Scott it’s alright” he said gently hoping his words would at least get the other male to let go of him.
But it only seemed to anger Scott more he heard a low growl before he was pried away from the wall and tossed through the air. Derek’s body bounced slightly as he landed on the bed his heart pounding in his chest as he tried to roll off the mattress but a body pinned him onto it.
“You don’t know anything…” Scott hissed his hands pinning Derek’s arms to the bed ensuring that the male couldn't attempt to push him away.
“This is your fault.”
Derek flinched at those words and the pure hatred behind them. “W-what?...” He stuttered in confusion don’t get him wrong of course he had pondered on that, he knew that if he was there he might have provided extra back up and that probably would have helped Allison.
“If you had just let me to kill Peter then I would have turned back to normal and none of this would have happened!”
Derek shook his head once again “Scott...there was no real guarantee that would have worked” the body on top of him tensed before he felt a palm slam against his cheek, Derek stiffened his cheek stinging.
“Shut up! Allison would have still been alive and I would be human this is all your fault!”
The red eyes brightened as Derek felt claws tear through his shirt and scrap against his chest, he shivered unconsciously and squirmed “hold still!” The beta stiffened almost immediately the tone of the other’s voice pulling on every instinct to listen and obey.
He didn't flinch when Scott tore off his remaining clothes he didn't protest when the alpha’s claws scraped at his skin, he didn't make a noise when he felt pain curl up his spine as he took out his frustrations and anger out on him.
But when Scott was finally exhausted collapsing next to him on the bed covered in blood and sweat Derek finally allowed his body to being the long healing process.
He allowed himself to feel.