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For the first time in its most utterly stupid and dumbest way possible, Chanyeol’s stomach drops low to the floor the moment his best friend Baekhyun enters the room, carrying all the beauty Chanyeol has never seen in a way similar to what he has experienced before.
Chanyeol thinks it’s crazy because Baekhyun is still doing all the things he usually do. Smiling, waving, and still looking as elegant as ever as he paved his way towards Chanyeol. But the only thing changing is how Chanyeol’s breath was caught in his throat, the same way sappy Jongin describes it whenever he sees Kyungsoo.
Everything fades, and Chanyeol wants to cry becauses this has never happened before. His heart is thudding against his chest so loud he could hear it despite the thunderous noises created by the roaring rain outside. It’s shocking because the moment Baekhyun smiles, everything inside him just stops like nothing ever happened in the first place.
Baekhyun. Byun Baekhyun suddenly turned so beautiful in his eyes and he doesn’t know if it’s his fever or his mind playing tricks on him over and over again.
“How are you feeling?” Baekhyun asks him with a face full of concern, a bowl of soup in his hands. “I need a bit more information why you are so dirty the moment you knocked on my door, like you perpetually punched your face then headed towards my apartment.”
Chanyeol didn’t punch his face, his semi-drunk self did. He covers his swollen cheek.
“I’m fine,” he convinces the skeptical Baekhyun once his statement reaches his ears. “You know I’m clumsy, clumsy Park Chanyeol. I kept tripping on invisible stones on my way here since it’s raining and everything suddenly became so slippery and I just repeatedly slipped.”
He wishes it was enough to keep Baekhyun off track, but honestly the blame’s all on him. If he wasn’t drunk on 3 AM none of this would have ever happened. And maybe this was also the time his harbored feelings were so heavy inside his stomach but he doesn’t realize it, so he ended up collapsing on his best friend’s apartment.
“You’re lucky we’re on summer break, or I’m going to rip your face off, bitch.” Baekhyun mutters as he scoops out dubious amount of soup from the bowl he is holding. “Here, have some.”
Chanyeol stares at the spoon Baekhyun is holding and slowly shakes his head. Baekhyun sighs and almost rolled his eyes. “Look. I know I’m not a good cook but that was made from my heart and I give it to you. So would you please accept it?”
Chanyeol continues staring, still not moving an inch.
“Fine. I’ll just leave it here?” He points at the bedside table and Chanyeol nods. “Okay. Okay bye. I still need to film my video so stay put.”
Once Baekhyun exits the room, Chanyeol could feel all the colors rushing towards him again. He never noticed how his hands were clammy underneath the blanket nor does he notice how he’s been holding his breath for the longest time today.
Baekhyun proceeds towards his own room, thinking about how stupid Chanyeol was for letting himself be sick just because of the rain. He could still feel the hotness of the bowl of soup on his hands, and that warmed him down a bit from the cold.
His apartment has two rooms and the one Chanyeol is staying at, that’s where he dumps most of his instruments. His room is mostly white, but there are vinyl recordings on the walls as well as vintage cameras secured on top of his dresser. Whenever he would film videos, he would like everyone to see how much he loves filming possibly as how much as he loves music. Piano is his expertise, but since he doesn’t have enough time to practice anymore, he focuses solely on giving advices to thousands of his fans.
To say he is popular isn’t really that true, or that’s what he thinks. But Baekhyun doesn’t really consider himself popular with only 10k subscribers and mostly everyone are from his school, because Chanyeol and most of his friends does really well in advertising.
Although he doesn’t consider them that many, it is a wonder that every other day people from his school would claim that they are his fans. Some would ask for a photo, some would ask for an autograph, but what Baekhyun appreciates the most is how they would say thank you because he had helped them on their problems. It makes him feel validated as a growing YouTube advice channel.
As he enters his room, the lightning he has set up was glaring at him, a standby camera waiting for him to sit down on his bed and continue what he was saying before the soup boiled. He is once again greeted by Chanyeol on his mind, and he envisions how his best friend had said how he trips on slippery stones.
Well, right now his hands are sweating from the cold and also slippery, shall he let his hands trip on Chanyeol’s face as well?
His best friend may be tall, and dumb, and tall again, but sometimes he is cute. He makes Baekhyun feel at ease and makes him smile so that makes up from his faults. He makes everything more than okay.
Chanyeol sometimes wishes that Baekhyun stares at him more than he stares at his stupid camera.
It’s getting frustrating because the moment Baekhyun is in front of the camera, he smiles. Baekhyun feels much more comfortable like he is back home. Chanyeol hopes he has that kind of effect on Baekhyun, that his best friend would blindly look at him whenever he wasn’t looking and just smile.
It’s confusing at first—how he initially encountered different feelings all directed towards his best friend. It’s like a breath of fresh air, except the air wasn’t fresh and he feels suffocated. But after a few weeks, he’s gotten used to it.
And now, it comes to the point where Baekhyun would ask him if he knows who LOEY is and why is he asking advice on how to confess to his best friend.
Come to think of it, how naïve could Baekhyun be?
The other day, when their group of friends visited a newly opened eatery, Baekhyun asked this in front of all of them. Albeit being 6 ft. tall, Chanyeol felt incredibly small. He was so aware of the snickering of his so-called friends because they all knew, and he just wished Baekhyun didn’t see how redder he was than the plate of spaghetti he was eating.
Maybe Baekhyun already knows who he is, or what the hell is he doing with his life. Maybe he just likes to tease Chanyeol and oh well, benefit from it because making Chanyeol feel dumber than he already is is definitely one of his forté.
But look, because of what’s happening, Chanyeol likes to think that in this platonic relationship, Baekhyun is the dumb one.
His fingers hover on top of the comment section again, contemplating whether he should post another one of his thousand comments through his phone. With a dozen of words and a fast beating heart he continues, hiding by the pseudonym of a sickly in love guy named LOEY.
“Could you please give an advice on how I should confess to my best friend?”
Maybe B.Hyun would notice this one day.
Who the hell are you?
Baekhyun chews on his lower lip when he sees another one of those comments again on his latest video. Now that it’s vacation, Baekhyun feels really confident on being able to post multiple videos and advices.
LOEY, a random guy on the internet, kept asking him advice on how he could confess to his best friend. And how funny is that, because he thinks that LOEY is so deep into his personal dilemma. In no way Baekhyun could answer that question. How could he, when his platonic relationship with Chanyeol could not be upgraded into something more?
He restlessly slumps his back on the headboard, feeling a thousand times more exhausted than he already is. He has a rule that if the same person comments the same question over and over again for 15 times, he is obliged to answer it. And LOEY—he squints his eyes on the small sticky note by his calendar in front of his desk—has already 12 streaks. 3 more and freaking hell, he needs to deal with it.
How should he know? He continues to ask himself, when he’s never been in love with Chanyeol, and Chanyeol’s never been in love with him?
Chanyeol tries as hard as he can to bury his feelings alive, believe him, but whenever he would come an inch too close to Baekhyun, or even see his pretty fingers near his own, his mind turns hazy and he wonders why he should forget, anyway.
Every time spent with Baekhyun is a time of bliss. He momentarily forgets everything, and all of them fades away except for his feelings and a very, very beautiful Byun Baekhyun.
And he wonders, has he always been like that? Because Baekhyun certainly turned more beautiful especially with that shine in his eyes. Suddenly he turned more ethereal, like an angel glowing whenever he would come near. But then he asks himself, has he been floating, dreaming all this time and everything including his feelings doesn’t really exist?
“Chanyeol?”
Baekhyun has a beautiful voice, that’s for sure. The smaller’s love for the world of music isn’t new to Chanyeol. He could imagine Baekhyun reaching out for the microphone at class, then singing his heart out because the teacher is still nowhere to be found.
So Baekhyun uttering his name definitely sounded like music to his ears. He tries so hard not to melt.
“I think it sounds pretty.” Chanyeol comments. He is struck by the realization that Baekhyun is asking him about his new video, not about his golden voice. Baekhyun raises his eyebrows at him. Chanyeol flailed his hands around their faces, very red and denying.
“Pretty good for an advice! I really think you said well about uhm, his wedding cake.”
“Chanyeol.” Baekhyun mutters again, a smile forming on his face. Chanyeol’s nervous grin never left. “Please.”
“I was actually talking about the new necklace I bought, here. It’s here on my neck.” He holds it up to show Chanyeol the sphere shaped pendant dangling around his neck under his sweater. He presses something and it opens, revealing a photo of them together. And Chanyeol’s heart flips endlessly again.
“I was asking how about I should keep us locked here forever. You said it sounds pretty. Thank you.”
Chanyeol sounds apologetic. “I’m sorry, but us staying together really sounded pretty I swear.”
“I know it does.” Baekhyun grins and kept it under his sweater again. “Chanyeol and Baekhyun.” He whispers dreamily. “You’re my best friend! What would I do without you?”
“Uh, you are nothing without me.” Chanyeol jokes. I am nothing without you.
“Friends forever?” Baekhyun raises his pinky.
With a heavy heart, he raises his, too. Using the happiest voice he could muster, he clashes them together. “Friends forever.”
Is it bad that he wants them to be something more?
b. hyun
@B0506
hey, this is B.Hyun! i saw your profile on your youtube channel :) can i get more information about your problem?
LOEY
@loeyrecords
Hello! I didn’t expect you to all of a sudden DM me about this. I’m overwhelmed!
Baekhyun never messages fans about their problems. Messaging LOEY made him a little bit nervous because he didn’t really DM him on Twitter because of his advice, but DMed him because he somehow interests him.
Baekhyun loves music as much as he loves filming, so seeing the amazing LOEY being all musically inclined on his profile made him throw up a bunch of platonic heart emojis all over the screen.
Before messaging him, of course, Baekhyun didn’t really stalk him up until his very first video dated back at 2013, where he was dedicating a song for his new found best friend, or his latest update yesterday, his “new recording! (because i think i’m falling in love)”.
It took about 5 years before he realized he is falling in love, Baekhyun thought, but his song last 2013 says otherwise. Who the hell is naïve enough to not notice the adoration and love he radiates last 2013? The comment page reeks of it.
He watched his videos long enough to see the “Haha no :) We are platonic. We are both straight, too! I’m just thankful because I finally found someone who can analyze this weird and crazy world with me. 20120507 xo"s transitioning to “It’s so crazy I want to spend the rest of my life staring at his eyes I’m going to fucking die.”s
Holy shit. LOEY is so smitten, Baekhyun isn’t so sure how to give him advices except “JUSTTT FUCKINGGG SAY ITTTT”
He founds himself talking to LOEY again after a few hours.
LOEY
I mean he wasn’t really so beautiful in my eyes a month ago. Just one day and the path he was walking on started turning magical.
I don’t remember when I started feeling like this but it’s weird. I really think I realized it the moment my heart skipped its beat. We’re best friends and best friends aren’t supposed to have unexplainable heart beating moments with the other. They aren’t supposed to get urges to hug the other because they are overflowing with euphoria when they get closer!
b. hyun
oh you songwriters have a knack for words, don’t you?
if i were your best friend and you sent me that i might give you a chance
LOEY
Really?!
I mean, he doesn’t know I write songs. I keep my ability a secret.
b. hyun
but why?! everything that you touch turn so beautiful!
LOEY
Hmm maybe. I hug him a little too much too so maybe that’s why he turned so fucking beautiful all so sudden in my eyes.
Baekhyun is with Chanyeol the whole day, but he feels like his best friend is turning sick because he always turns so red when he would see him.
Come to think of it, he is friends for so long with Chanyeol but he doesn’t really know that much about him. Sure, it’s always the typical Chanyeol likes to wear his headphones, and Chanyeol writes the best prose and poetry and he sends some monthly to Baekhyun if the smaller asks. But Baekhyun wishes to know Chanyeol.
His best friend is a little too secretive for the ever so curious Baekhyun. He isn’t complaining but he wishes for something more.
“Do you listen to Coldplay?”
Chanyeol almost spits his water when Baekhyun said that. “Nani?! They’re my favorite band! Howdya know that?”
“Well a certain friend told me,” Baekhyun replies, nibbling on his lips while taking interest in looking at the ceiling.
They have talked. A lot. Baekhyun already considers LOEY as an online best friend because they somehow click so much. He just wishes Chanyeol wouldn’t be jealous since Baekhyun is guilty of always chatting with LOEY. Chanyeol on social media suddenly became so inactive, so he blames that.
“Really?” Chanyeol asks him, and is Baekhyun mistaken or there really is a small smile on Chanyeol’s lips. “Who is he?”
Baekhyun lets out a nervous laugh. “Funny to say this but, he is actually LOEY. Remember him? The one who always comments on my videos asking for advice.”
“Yes I do.” Chanyeol is smiling in all teeth, Baekhyun almost thinks it’s weird if he isn’t so used to it. “What are the things you talk about?”
Oh shit, he doesn’t want his best friend to feel bad because he talks about anything with LOEY.
“I--uh. Well, I know his favorite band and movie, and that he is inspired by his best friend to create songs because the best friend he loves absolutely loves music as well.”
“Mhm,” Chanyeol nods, urging Baekhyun to continue.
“And uhm well,” Baekhyun realizes Chanyeol doesn’t really mind so he speaks a little more freely. “And that his best friend absolutely adores the piano’s ivory keys. LOEY thinks he’s really beautiful. Sends him poetry at first, but all those turned into songs. It’s just sad that he is too shy to sing them all to him.”
“And he has written plenty right?”
“Yes he ha--how did you know?” asks the curious Baekhyun.
“I can sense it through his words. Poets to poets, yeah?”
Baekhyun’s skepticalness turns into understanding once Chanyeol pays him back the widest smile he has given for a while. Chanyeol is still smiling at him so hard that Baekhyun had to ask, “Why?”
Chanyeol lunges at him with a very big hug. “Oh! You naïve little boy!”
Baekhyun squeals because Chanyeol is too happy and he’s hugging him a little too tight.
A few weeks later, Baekhyun realizes that vacation is almost coming to an end. And it’s a pretty productive vacation in Baekhyun’s opinion, because he manages to upload at least one video a week all the while talking to LOEY and having numerous sleepovers with Chanyeol.
Although productiveness in relation to school? Not so much. Now he struggles to answer some worksheets and write a paper within two days of his hectic life. He suddenly regrets all those time spent messaging LOEY, because he realizes he could do this instead.
“But did you ever regret staying here, doing nothing all day?” Chanyeol asks. His best friend is speaking with a familiar tone, he just can’t quite get the message Chanyeol wants to portray.
Baekhyun stares at him, figuring him out when he almost got lost in Chanyeol’s eyes. His best friend is already editing his own paper, sucking a lollipop in between his lips. Baekhyun finds himself memorizing the small details on Chanyeol’s side figure, his large ears, and his very pointy nose. Chanyeol’s eyelashes are also pretty long, longer than how Baekhyun remembers it to be, and his eyes.
He has very beautiful eyes.
Staring at him, Baekhyun finds himself lost in translation. Chanyeol’s perfectly written words versus his shitty excuse of a poetry when Chanyeol asked him to send him one. Chanyeol’s very tall figure almost reaching ceilings of rooms versus his small one, perfect to lay down the floor and cry.
He wonders what factor is perfect enough for the both of them to click in friendship for years now. He is thankful for that factor because he got the most amazing person. And he wishes he’s all for him.
“Silly Chanyeol, of course I wouldn’t regret days spent with you.”
It gets more cuter once the reds all gather on Chanyeol’s face.
“Really?”
“Really, really.”
It is the first time Baekhyun’s heartbeat stops because of Chanyeol’s smile.
LOEY
I SENT YOU A PRESENT! ♡
Baekhyun really is thankful because just in time for classes, everything school-related has been done and made.
As he gets ready for school, an unexpected message from LOEY greets him. Baekhyun raises his eyebrows up because how could LOEY give him gifts when he has no clue on where Baekhyun lives? He never said it on any of his videos.
b. hyun
ok ok. on what site did you give me the gift?
LOEY
Not a site! Check your desk later at school!
A mixtape and collection of lyrics.
Baekhyun scrunches his nose up when he found absolutely nothing suspicious going on inside their room. Could it be possible that these people have seen this culprit? Isn’t LOEY a little popular himself, with his written songs and everything? Would they know him?
“You know LOEY?!” Jongin excitedly greets him, bumping him on the shoulder as he stares at the vintage package secured tightly on Baekhyun’s hands. “That singer-songwriter on YouTube? He deserves more subscribers right?”
“Did you give these?” Baekhyun ignores his question and asks this. Jongin appears to be a little bit taken aback. Maybe he shouldn’t have surprised him like that but he is just so curious who LOEY is. Is he someone Baekhyun knows?
“If you think this is my prank I swear I didn’t do it!” Jongin says with wide eyes but then it changed into something somewhat similar to a smirk. “Ask Kyungsoo, he’ll know.”
“No way. Kyungsoo is LOEY?” Baekhyun exclaims, but then he covered his lips when a few students started staring at him. He faces Jongin who is already laughing and he slaps him. “Stop it!”
“How on Earth is LOEY close to the name Kyungsoo? And he wouldn’t give you those. What is he, like in love? He hates you. And he’s mine.”
“Wow gee, that’s motivating. But congrats?” Baekhyun says. He never knew how Jongin and Kyungsoo we’re together.
Jongin clicks his tongue. “Fine, you don’t have to ask Kyungsoo. I’ll save you all the trouble. Chanyeol was here first, just in case you didn’t know. You’re welcome.”
Baekhyun starts heaving a huge sigh because Jongin didn’t really save him any trouble. He could just say the name, and he wouldn’t approach Chanyeol to ask him if he saw the one who gave it.
But as soon as his eyes found him, the giant is past asleep on his own desk. He wouldn’t know. Baekhyun wonders. Why on earth is Chanyeol early on the first day of classes? He usually sleeps his way in. He even made an effort to go to school extra early. Probably earlier than before. Earlier than he ever did? Was this day a little too special for him? Did he miss someone on school?
Baekhyun puffs his cheeks and sat on his own desk, placing the pile of mixtapes on top of his desk before examining the contents. These aren’t really old, more like ranging 3-5 years ago. It appears to be really vintage though, like LOEY made it to look like that. Baekhyun fought the urge to smile because they are beautiful, they really fit his aesthetic.
There is also a torn page of paper full of watercolor swatches and a few line arts. It’s a simple typewritten note that says:
To my B,
I really needed to take this off my chest.
These are all the songs I wrote for you, starting from friends, to wishing we were lovers.
I’d love to say ‘I love you’ personally.
But I’m always shy to do so.
So I hope my songs do their job of telling them for me.
His heart won’t stop beating so fast.
b. hyun
i listened to everything
you can’t possibly be in love with me
hahaha
no
i’m not your best friend
i shouldn’t have talked to you
he deserves you, you can’t possibly be serious
LOEY
Look, I’m really not expecting you to return it back.
b. hyun
no i don’t want you to be hurt
and i don’t want to ruin the fundamental rules of the universe about us
you belong with your best friend
i belong with mine
LOEY
“i belong with mine"?
What are you saying?
What? Baekhyun’s heart can’t take this much affection. He started sobbing uncontrollably.
b. hyun
i dont know do not fucking ask me
i dont know what i should feel right now
im so fucking sad
because you were never him
well i wish you were
because every time i talk to you, he is the one coming to my mind
and you both write so beautifully it fucking hurts
LOEY
Please slow down. I can’t catch up.
b. hyun
my best friend
you sound so much like him
he sounds so much like you
and is it bad my heart has always been thinking about him when i started talking to you?
that with your actions i started incorporating him because you are so similar
and i know he isnt you
its really so sad on my part that i cant give you your advice video because i want to know more about him through you
LOEY
Baekhyun.
b. hyun
you talk so much about your best friend i started thinking that he’s me
LOEY
But Baekhyun, he is you.
He has always been you, my love.
b. hyun
no he’s not
LOEY
Is it bad because I’m laughing right now while you are crying?
Baekhyun wiped his tears on his sleeves.
b. hyun
how do you know im crying?
LOEY
I’m right next to you, you dumdum
He cranes his neck just to stare at his gleaming best friend, Park Chanyeol.
“You are so fucking stupid! I fucking hate you! I shouldn’t even befriended you after my birthday!”
“Hey!” Chanyeol uses his arm to block Baekhyun’s fast reflexes out of the way. “Hey! Hey! Stop!”
“And you don’t laugh at me while I’m being miserable! I can’t believe you!”
“How can I stop laughing when you are so oblivious all this time, Byun Baekhyun? I have loved in all my forms.” Chanyeol wipes his tears away.
“Singer-songwriter YouTuber LOEY, or stupid and awkward best friend Park Chanyeol, I will always be in love with you. And I can’t believe how naïve can you be? When in my LOEY form, all I described was you.”
Baekhyun could just faint there and then.
“My love,” Chanyeol whispers. “Everything has always been about you.”
Baekhyun replies back. “I think… everything is starting to be all about you, too.”
“Good morning my lovelies!”
In front of the screen sits Baekhyun together with his best friend, Chanyeol.
“Today is a special episode becauseeee!” Baekhyun bumps Chanyeol on the shoulder. “Say it, love!”
“He finally stopped being so oblivious.” Chanyeol rolls his eyes. “And I finally had the guts to confess to him! Isn’t that beautiful or what?”
“Okay, okay.” Baekhyun laughs, ending his intro. “This video is all for LOEY. I think you all know who he is?”
“A very handsome commenter who is very much in love with his best friend. The same way I’m in love with you.” Chanyeol might stare at Baekhyun for the majority of this upload.
“Please don’t.”
“You are blushing.”
“No I’m not!”
“I love you.”
“Stop it!”
2706 comments
Kai
finally you did it bro
Sehun
I’M THEIR LOVE CHILD EVERYONE. THEIR LOVE CHILD!!!!
Ksoo
You are all dumb
ethereal b.
I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU♡
LOEY
I couldn’t thank you enough for everything. I finally found out that my best friend is in love with me, too.