Work Text:
Yongguk knew he was supposed to go to sleep. He knew it was late and he was working too much. Like always. But inspiration had just hit him so he had to write it down. He was halfway through a song when he stopped. Writer block. Amazing.
He sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose and then rubbing his face with both his hands. He suddenly felt a headache creep its way to his temples.
He felt some shifting behind him and remembered he was sharing the hotel room with Junhong. He twisted his body on the chair and turned towards the beds, where he found Junhong sprawled on one of them, staring at him.
“Hey, am I keeping you up?” he asked, worried he might have been disturbing his dongsaeng.
“No, hyung, I just... can't sleep.” Junhong shrugged his shoulders, blinking his eyes fast as he bit down on his lip.
Yongguk turned to look at his laptop then glanced back at Junhong. He was stuck with the writing, he might as well stop. And Junhong looked like he wanted to talk. He fully turned to face the laptop, saving his work and then shutting it closed. He stood up, stretched his back and shoulders and then plopped down on the empty bed. He propped himself up on his elbow, facing Junhong, who had shifted so he was still staring at him, those big, doe eyes never leaving his hyung.
“What's bothering you?”
“Nothing.”
Yongguk fixed him with a look. They had known each other for years. He could easily tell when he was lying. He hesitated for a few seconds, wondering if Junhong would appreciate physical contact but the kid was still staring at him, eyes filled with what looked like fear. Why would he be scared?
Yongguk finally made up his mind, throwing his legs over the edge of the bed and scratching the back of his head. “Is it okay if I, um, come to your bed and, um, we.... we cuddle?” he asked, suddenly feeling bashful. He had slept in the same bed as Himchan before and even if his friend turned out to be very chaotic even in his sleep and elbowed him in the ribs a few times, he hadn't minded. He would never admit it, but he did like to cuddle. It felt nice. And he definitely didn't care if he did it with another boy. He wasn't into labels or that kind of shit. Yet, he felt like it would be different with Junhong. Baby-faced, innocent Junhong, who always looked up at him. And that had turned a very bright shade of pink after his hyung's proposal.
“Um...”
“It's okay if you don't want to.” Yongguk smiled reassuringly, passing a hand through his messy hair.
“No, no, I'd like that.” Junhong smiled back, as if on reflex, sitting up in bed to better look at his hyung. “I mean... not like-like... but, um, I'd like... I... um, I think it's okay...” he stuttered out and Yongguk thought he was even more adorable than usual.
He grinned, standing up and going over Junhong's bed. He petted his head, ruffling his hair. “Come on, let's go under the covers. It's getting chilly.”
Junhong nodded his head, still blushing a little. He undid the bed, slipping easily under the covers and holding them up for his hyung to do the same. Yongguk did, shifting closer to his dongsaeng. He lied on his back, holding out his arm. He pointed to his chest with his chin, waiting for Junhong to take the hint of resting his head there. Junhong bit down on his lip before following his hyung's silent request. He cautiously rested his head on Yongguk's chest, using the back of his left hand as a sort of pillow. Yongguk's arm wrapped around him, securing his position against his side. He held him tightly for a second and then more softly. Junhong sighed happily, nuzzling his nose against Yongguk's t-shirt.
They stayed quiet for a while, Yongguk almost dozing off, the tiredness of the day finally hitting him.
“Hyung.” whispered Junhong. The thumb under his face and on Yongguk's chest had started twitching, drawing random patterns against Yongguk's skin. “I need to tell you something.”
“Okay.” hummed Yongguk.
“I don't know how, though.”
He heard him sniffle, so he held him tighter. “Whenever you're ready. I'll wait.”
Junhong shifted his head a little so he could look up at him, his eyes blinking fast. “But I can't keep lying...”
Yongguk started to imagine what that was about and he felt like crying. He had always had a soft spot for Junhong. And just the thought of him going through that on his own made his heart break.
“Hyung.” Junhong looked him straight in the eyes, a mix of fear and determination in them. “I think I like boys.” he whispered.
Yongguk couldn't help but smile softly, holding him tighter. “That's okay, Junhongie.”
“But, hyung, I'm so scared...” Junhong adverted his eyes, blinking fast and resting his head back on Yongguk's chest.
“That's also okay.” He manhandled Junhong a little and shifted down on his side, until they were facing each other, their faces at the same level. He patted Junhong's cheek and then let his hand slide down to his bicep, staying there, his fingers squeezing down gently on the muscle. “It's a scary world, the one we live in.”
Junhong sniffled harder, wiping at his left eye with his wrist.
“But I promise, I'll try my best to always protect you. Okay?” He smiled, inching closer to Junhong.
Junhong's face scrunched up and he let out a small sob. “Hyung.”
“Hey, it's okay, come here.” He opened his arms and held him to his chest. He was glad Junhong hadn't gone through puberty yet, making it easy for him to hug him tightly.
Junhong hugged him back, hiding his face in the crook of Yongguk's neck. “Thank you.” he whispered.
“Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me.” sighed Yongguk, rubbing his back in a comforting way.
They stayed like that for a while, Junhong hiccups slowly subsiding. Yongguk was about to doze off again. He realised he liked cuddling with Junhong. Not that he would admit it. Or at least, not to the other members.
“Hyung.”
“Yes?”
“Do you also like boys?”
He had been waiting for the question. He knew he hadn't been too subtle about his disinterest in girls or relationships, getting teased by Himchan a few times. He didn't mind the teasing, though, shrugging it off and laughing along with the others. The only thing he cared about was work. And his members. Especially his members. “Honestly?” he hesitated a little, resting his forehead against Junhong's and closing his eyes. “I don't know.” He reopened his eyes, smiling. “I don't really care about relationships. But I think, you know, I wouldn't mind dating a boy if I like him.”
“Oh.”
Junhong's brow furrowed cutely. Yongguk touched it with his index finger until it went away.
“But I don't think I'll ever be in a relationship.”
“Why?”
“I'm too focused on work. And my members. Who would want to be with someone like me?” He chuckled softly.
“I can think of a lot of people, hyung. Like... most of our fans??” scoffed Junhong, raising one of his eyebrows.
Yongguk barked out a laugh, making Junhong laugh as well. They got silent again, resuming their previous position, Junhong resting his head on Yongguk's chest. But instead of using his hand as a pillow under his cheek, he slid it over Yongguk's side, hugging him. He sighed happily and nuzzled his nose against Yongguk's chest, tangling their legs together. Yongguk was sure his heart was about to burst with affection. He grinned widely, glad Junhong couldn't see him.
“I didn't know you liked to cuddle so much, hyung.” giggled Junhong.
Yongguk froze, a little embarrassed about getting caught.
“Do you cuddle with Himchan hyung too?”
Yongguk cleared his throat. “Well, I tried once, but he never sleeps still. He kicked me and elbowed me so many times.”
Junhong laughed harder, his body vibrating with it against Yongguk.
“Ya, don't laugh!” protested Yongguk, chuckling. “He almost broke my ribs!”
“Sure, hyung.” teased him Junhong, his tone playful.
“Don't tell him, though.” he whispered. “Or the others.”
“Don't worry. I won't threaten your bad boy image, hyung.” hummed Junhong, patting his chest. “I hope I'm a better cuddler, though.”
“I bet you are, Junhongie.”