Lena scrubbed at her eyes and flipped her bangs out of her face. She scoffed. “Why would I care if you were angry or not?”
Beakley sighed, sitting on the edge of Lena’s bed. “That’s not the issue here, Lena.”
“Then what is? Cause I have shit to do if you’re just going to waste my time.”
“Language.”
“Fuck you.”
Beakley took a moment to breathe and adjust her spectacles. “I’ll wait until you’re feeling a bit more mature.”
Lena sniffled, rubbing at her eyes with her sweater sleeve. The two of them sat in silence for a few minutes before Lena took a deep breath. “Why do you care?”
“Would you like to be more specific?”
Lena groaned and flopped back on her pillows, one arm draped over her eyes. “Not really.”
Beakley rolled her eyes. “Then I can’t answer the question.”
“…why do you care about me?”
There was a beat of silence. “…excuse me?”
“Don’t make me say it again, Tea Time.” Lena mumbled.
The older woman rested a hand on her shoulder, her brow furrowing in concern when the teenager didn’t shove her away. “I don’t quite understand what you’re asking me.”
“I just don’t get it, okay? There’s no reason for you to give a shit about me but here you are trying to explain yourself for yelling at me. I deserved it!”
“No, I lost my temper and I was sharp with you. You don’t deserve someone raising their voice at you just because they’re upset.”
“Okay, you’re literally not making any sense.”
“How so?”
Lena spread her arms dramatically and scowled at the ceiling. “You didn’t just yell cause you were upset. You were upset because I made you upset. It was my fault, so I deserved to get yelled at. That’s how it works, Super Nanny.”
Beakley massaged her temples. “No, Lena, that’s not how it works.”
“That’s exactly how it works, actually.”
“Lena—”
“Wow, B, I didn’t think you were the kind of person to invalidate a child’s own personal experiences. That’s really harsh.”
Beakley grumbled to herself and rolled her eyes. But then she looked down at Lena. The girl’s eyes were spilling over with tears. Her arms were folded tightly against her chest, shoulders shaking. Lena wasn’t looking at her, instead she was glaring up at the ceiling. Beakley immediately softened. She grasped Lena’s arm again, watching as Lena’s shaking died down. “I’m not trying to invalidate your experiences. I understand that the home you left was much different from the home you have now.”
“Yeah, that’s the understatement of the century.”
“But, that doesn’t mean I’m going to ignore where you’re coming from. I understand that this is a real change. I need you to know that you are loved in this house. When I raised my voice at you, it was not appropriate. I was frustrated and I didn’t express it very well at all.”
Lena sniffled and wiped her eyes again.
“I know I frightened you when I yelled. And I’m sorry.” She brushed Lena’s bangs out of her eyes. Lena didn’t push her away. “I was never angry with you.”
Lena didn’t say anything in response. But, she did roll onto her side towards Beakley and let her continue to brush her fingers through her hair. She was sniffling again. The two sat in silence for a while. Lena ended up curled into Beakley’s side, letting Beakley wrap an arm around her shoulders.
“…okay.”
“What was that?”
“I said okay. That…I get you weren’t mad. It’s okay.”
Beakley let out a low sigh and smiled. She gave Lena’s shoulders another tight squeeze. “Would you like to help me make the cookies for our lunches this week?”
“Only if I get to pack extras.”
“Sounds fair enough.”