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"Commander."
Shepard turned, swallowing the bit of dried...apple...pear?...no, probably apple...she'd been chewing her way through while she caught up on her messages. "Primarch Victus."
Victus stood at the side of the table, tray in hand. Behind him, the Normandy crew filed into the mess, gathering their own trays. Shepard's eyes automatically flicked to his tray, making sure it was the correct color. Not that any turian on a human ship shouldn't be careful of what he ate, and not that those on mess detail shouldn't have done their job, and not that the dextro food they'd picked up on the Citadel shouldn't have been familiar enough for him to know by sight, but...the very last thing she needed was for the Primarch of Palaven to die of anaphylactic shock because someone handed him the wrong lunch.
But no. Blue tray. All good. Blue tray with...whatever Garrus just slipped onto it, too, as he breezed by.
"Commander, I--I SAW that, Vakarian."
Garrus turned but didn't slow his now-backward walk back to the battery. He even stepped up onto the stairs backward, the show off. "Never said you didn't. You skipped breakfast. Again."
Victus grumbled something Shepard's translator didn't catch, tossing the package of whatever-it-was back at Garrus. "Take this back."
Garrus snagged "this" out of the air and sent it sailing back over Gabby's head all in one movement. "Nope. I hate globi. Can't stand them."
Victus caught it one-handed, mandibles twitching as he wound up to toss it back again. "Lying sack of--" He sighed as the battery's doors closed behind Garrus' retreating back, tossing the packet back onto his tray.
Shepard had to admire Garrus' timing. Nicely executed maneuver.
Victus turned back to her, eyes narrowed and mandibles pulled tight in annoyance. Mock or real, she couldn't tell. Or perhaps it was embarrassment? She had only the sketchiest idea of turian military protocol, but Garrus did seem to be walking perilously close to the subordinate/friend line in the middle of an Alliance mess hall.
Victus had evidently decided to ignore Garrus' shenanigans. "Commander, I was hoping you and I could talk. In private."
"Sure." She stood, taking her coffee and packet of Sandwich, Peanut Butter, (1) with her, and gestured toward the elevator. "My quarters are as private as it gets around here."
****
Victus was baffled by the fishtank. At least, that was her conclusion when she looked back to find him paused in the entryway, staring at it in apparent confusion. Then his eyes traveled to the rest of her quarters and the bafflement morphed into what might have been outright outrage. He opened his mouth, thought better of it, then finally came out with, "Wasn't the Normandy originally designed by turians?"
"The SR1 was, and don't worry, it had a very properly tiny Captain's cabin."
"Well, good, otherwise I would be offended."
"The SR2 was redesigned by Cerberus, though, and believe me, if I'd been asked, I would have told them to use all this space for something else." She set her food down on the coffee table before coming over to gesture at the tank in an obvious, cross-species "why?" "I mean, come on...a fishtank?"
Victus chuckled as he moved down the stairs. "I suppose you could always use it as a supplementary water source. Stock it with some particularly edible fish.... Kar'Shan eel is quite tasty grilled, or so I hear."
"Don't listen to him, Wrigley, I'd never. Unless I had to." Shepard said, patting the tank. That got a laugh out of Victus, at least, which she counted as a win.
She gestured for him to take the low-backed turian-style seat that Garrus liked. "Oh, sure, get me thinking about real food, why don't you? By the way, what was that thing you and Garrus were fighting over?"
"Globi. I have no idea if there's a human equivalent, but they're a dessert." He took off his gloves, slitting open the packet with a claw and tilting it so she could see several dark, vaguely round, crumbly lumps. Her nose twitched a bit, the smell strange and reminiscent of...candied bacon? Of course turians would make desserts out of meat.
She tore into her sandwich packet with less gusto. "In Alliance rations, dessert's always the best part."
"In turian rations, as well."
"Military food transcends species, I guess. I know soldiers who will trade a week's pay for their favorite under the right conditions."
"As do I." Victus continued opening his food and poked at the top layer of his...wrap-looking-thing? He sighed in what sounded like disappointment and speared one of the globi with a claw instead. "And I know for a fact that Vakarian paid an exorbitant amount for a packet of these on Manae at least once."
Shepard found her eyes following those claws without really knowing why until she realized that it was because he was using them. They were sharp. Garrus' claws were long but blunted, certainly not sharp enough to use as casual stabbing and cutting mini-utensils the way that Victus was doing. She wondered if that meant something. Was claw sharpness personal style? Cultural difference? Job-dependent? Hanging-around-with-aliens-dependent? She'd have to ask Garrus later.
She gave the sandwich the obligatory once-over. No mold, no weird spots. Acceptable. "Anyway, I doubt you wanted to talk about food."
"Actually...," Victus said, "I wanted to talk about you and Vakarian." Shepard's eyes flicked up to him, glad that her sandwich was in front of her face. "I apologize in advance for any offense I may give, Commander. My experience with humans is limited, to say the least, and I'm not great at being tactful. But I want to make sure I know the situation here."
"All right," she said, swallowing her lump of peanut butter bread. "What do you want to know?"
"What exactly is your relationship with Vakarian? Are you friends, or lovers?"
Shepard tried to keep her face neutral. She supposed that she and Garrus should have talked about this. What had he already said? Was being honest going to get him in trouble? She knew how humans saw turian-human relationships (generally a continuum from "weird with a side of kinky" to xenophobic frothing), but didn't know about the turian side of the equation. Not to mention, she didn't know how the euphemisms she'd usually use would even translate to Victus, or if they'd carry the right connotations. But lying was always guaranteed to be seen as dishonorable by turians. More or less dishonorable than sleeping with a human, though? Or a superior? Was she Garrus' superior, technically?
And she knew it was just a turian thing, but his tendency to not use Garrus' first name rubbed her the wrong way. In her experience, if you were talking about someone's sex life, you at least used their first damn name.
Ah, to hell with it. If he got to be blunt, so did she.
"We're both," she said. "We're lovers, and I consider him my best friend." The words seemed woefully inadequate to describe what Garrus was to her, but she really didn't feel like going into more detail with a man she'd just met a week ago. Maybe he had the right to ask, but it still irked her.
Evidently being straightforward was the right tactic, though, because some of the strange tension went out of Victus' shoulders. "I see," was all he said, though. He was evidently relaxed enough to dig into his lunch, though, the bastard. She couldn't tell if he was thinking or just letting her sweat.
She very carefully set down her sandwich and folded her hands around her knee. "Is there a problem, Primarch?"
Victus looked up at her in surprise, wrap halfway to his mouth for a second bite. "...problem? No...why would there be?"
"I don't know. But I can't figure out why you're interested in Garrus' and my relationship unless it's against some regulation somewhere."
"Just about everything is, but I couldn't care less, honestly. No, that...wasn't my intent at all. Quite the opposite, in fact."
Her relief that Garrus wasn't going to have the Hierarchy on his case muddled back down into confusion. "The opposite?"
"Yes. I was hoping to start a relationship with Vakarian, myself, and wanted to make sure it wouldn't be improper."
Confusion nosedived into fishtank-level bafflement. "Wait...what?"
Victus spread his hands. "I honestly am not entirely sure if he is interested or if his nestmothering like earlier is just meant to be friendly, but...I'd like to ask him. I didn't fully understand your relationship, though, and I didn't want you to feel I was going behind your back. I wanted to be clear about my plans and make sure that you didn't object." Victus sounded so matter-of-fact about it, as if there was absolutely nothing odd about asking her if it was okay to hit on her boyfriend.
Had she stumbled into some new and exotic area of turian relationship etiquette? Was there some sort of competitive aspect to relationship partners that she didn't understand? Or had she given him the impression that their relationship was more casual than it actually was? Was their relationship more casual than she thought it was?
Or (and this was lowest on her list, but still not completely out of the question) was he just being a dick who wanted to pull rank and steal her man and thought she should know about it? Or some ugly trade for aid for Earth? Shepard hoped not. It would be tough getting turian support if she had to punch out the Primarch of Palaven, but for Garrus? She'd do it. See if she wouldn't. Then she'd hold Garrus' gloves while he punched him.
A small part of her was also amused at the term "nestmothering", but that was definitely secondary to the issue at hand.
Unfortunately her usual turian culture advisor wasn't in the room, and calling him up to quiz him wasn't really an option with Victus looking at her expectantly.
Shepard decided that perhaps more clarification was in order. "I...want to be clear, Primarch. What Garrus and I have isn't exactly casual. I--" Love? Did she want to admit the L word to herself? To him? No, no she did not, she was not going to say it to Victus before she said it to Garrus himself, dammit. "--care deeply for him and...greatly value our relationship."
That, oddly, didn't seem to deter Victus in the least. In fact, he gave the turian equivalent of a smile, voice pleased. "I'm glad to hear it. Vakarian has always spoken fondly of you, and I got the feeling that it was more than friendship. I admit, I was hoping that you shared his deeper feelings. He certainly deserves that level of devotion. I assure you, I'm not a fickle man. My interest in Garrus may be new, but it is also...serious."
Shepard had tried to keep her face neutral while he spoke, but she must not have been doing a very good job of it, as Victus was starting to look concerned, and not, she was pretty sure, for the reason she wanted him to be concerned.
Maybe some reframing of the question was in order? She forced her brow to smooth out, and said, "And, knowing that, you are asking me...if it is all right for you to start a relationship with Garrus?"
"Well...for starters, yes."
"For starters?"
He looked confused, now. Good, now they matched. "...well, yes. Perhaps I'm old fashioned, but I've found that relationships work best when all partners are, if not lovers, at least close--" There went her brow again, she could feel it scrunch up. "--and though I'm not certain how compatible you and I might be, I--Commander, have I offended you in some way? I can't even begin to read what emotion your face is registering right now."
Something in his words rang a tiny bell in the back of Shepard's mind. When had she learned about--ah, Mordin's "helpful" documents. She'd been more focused on the physical bits at the time, but he'd included some info on turian relationships that she'd skimmed over and-- "...Wait. 'Turian relationships are generally committed but not always strictly monogamous.'"
Victus looked at her as if she was a suspicious package that might explode if prodded too hard. "Correct?"
"Oh, shit, that's what that means." Shepard huffed a weak laugh. "And you mean...right. Okay. I understand now."
The Primarch of Palaven was still staring at her, looking vaguely like he wanted to back away slowly, but as she smiled, he tentatively relaxed, just a bit. "I'm glad? I get the feeling we have been having two different conversations."
"Yes, exactly." She chuckled, reaching for her coffee and wishing it was liquor. This discussion seemed like it required booze. "So, human relationships are usually monogamous, and you're usually expected to be exclusive. Even though Garrus and I haven't really discussed it, that was my...default assumption. Which made your request confusing until I realized that you were asking about a relationship in addition to the existing one, not a...competing relationship."
"Oh." Victus looked mildly horrified. "I...did not know that. And you thought I was.... Believe me, Commander, I would never attempt to compete with you for Garrus' affection. I'm very aware that I would lose."
Damn right you would, she thought, but tactfully did not say.
Victus took a swig of his drink, looking like he also wished it was alcoholic. "Right. Meanwhile, I was working off the assumption that group couplings were commonplace. I'd say about a quarter of turian relationships involve at least three and sometimes more people. I think it's fallen out of fashion with the younger generations, but it...never occurred to me that humans didn't do the same."
Victus looked uncomfortably like a man who never expected to be having this conversation. Shepard could relate. Finally, he sighed and shook his head. "You know, I had a long talk with myself earlier, about how now was a terrible time to try to negotiate a new relationship, especially a cross-species one. I see I should have listened to myself. I apologize, Commander. Forget I said any--"
"No!" Shepard found herself objecting. Victus stopped, and she sighed.
This was a weird conversation. A weird situation. But the same had been true when she'd first propositioned Garrus. And sometimes it was still weird: weird when they found a new way that turian and human culture was different, or when it took them five minutes of squirming to find a comfortable position to cuddle, or when she'd instinctively go for a kiss and forget the needle-like teeth and no lips.
But it was worth it. And like hell she'd tell Victus not to take that chance, if he felt the same way about Garrus that she did.
Garrus deserved every nice thing the universe could give him.
"No." She leaned forward, laying a hand on his arm. Feeling turian plating under cloth was actually kind of odd. So often with Garrus it was armor or nothing. "See...I've had that exact conversation with myself about me and Garrus. But...the entire time we've known each other, we've been on important missions with the fate of the galaxy hanging in the balance, and I can't see that changing. I was the one who approached Garrus, because you know what I decided?"
He was looking at her hand on his arm. Carefully, he laid his hand over hers. Like Garrus', his hands felt fever-warm. "What?"
"I decided: if not now...when? Because in our line of work? There's always going to be something."
Victus considered that for a moment, then nodded and murmured, "Very true."
Shepard cracked a smile. "Actually, I think the exact words that went through my head were 'Fuck it, no guts, no glory', but still--" Victus' head fell back as he laughed, mandibles twitching. "--you get the idea."
Victus shook his head as the laugh subsided to chuckles. "Yes. Heh. He does have a way of inspiring questionable choices, doesn't he?"
"Oh, you have no idea."
Victus seemed to gather himself for a moment, before meeting her eyes again. "Very well. Let me start over."
She gave his arm a squeeze. "Go for it."
"Ahem. Commander, I'm romantically interested in Vakarian and want to see if the interest is mutual. Would that be acceptable to you? I don't want to make you uncomfortable or to compromise what you two have."
The downside of clear communication: now she had to actually think about her answer. There were all kinds of reasons not to do this, but what she finally said was, "I think it's fine for you to approach Garrus and see if he's interested," she said. "If he is, then all three of us should probably talk about this, just so we're all on the same page."
"Of course."
"I'll be honest: I've never thought about being in a relationship with two people at once, so I can't really say how I'll react. I can say, however, that I honestly like what I've seen of you, if that counts for anything."
Victus was smiling again, carefully wrapping his fingers around hers and lifting so he could sandwich her hand between his own, chafing it idly as if trying to warm her. Garrus did the same thing, sometimes. Evidently the few degrees difference in turian and human body temperatures made her feel perpetually cold to him. "It does. If I am not reading Garrus wrong, then I would be coming into an established relationship. It would be my responsibility to find a way to fit into your lives in a comfortable way, whether that be as a lover or simply a friend."
"Okay. I do have to ask, though...are you actually interested in me, or do I just come as part of Garrus'...package." Okay, that sounded bad.
His slow smile grew. "Commander, you are one of the best soldiers in the galaxy. If there is one thing that will peak a turian's interest, it's military skill."
He opened his hands, running one finger carefully along the palm of her hand. The finger he used, she noticed, was slightly crooked. Broken and healed badly long ago, it looked like.
Shepard had to admit, sitting here with Victus carefully exploring her hand, looking down at her with that kind of intense interest in his eyes...he was making a compelling case for polyamory. He was a lot more confident than Garrus had been, but then...he was a lot older, too. Yet another thing that perhaps she should be concerned about but actually was not. Maybe that was a bonus of cross-species relationships: he didn't look old to her, even though he had a general's skill and experience. Turians weren't the only ones that found competence a turn-on. And somewhere along the way she'd gained an appreciation for turian crests. This close, she could see how Victus' looked thicker and more weathered than Garrus' was, rockets notwithstanding. She found herself wondering what it would feel like under her palms.
"Speaking of," he continued, as he stroked down the length of her trigger finger, "is it true that you were sniping Collectors with an anti-tank rifle?"
"Yes?" Shepard smirked. "I think she's still down in the armory, too, if you want to meet her."
His voice dropped, rumbling into the low tones that skated along the bottom of her hearing range. "...I see."
She let her smile spread. "So...headshots with ridiculously excessive firearms is the way to your heart, hmm?"
"One of them."
"Then I think we'll get along just fi--"
The door chimed open, and Garrus strode in, attention mostly on the datapad in his hand. "Shepard, Primarch, glad I could catch you at the...same...." He stopped halfway down the stairs, eyes darting to her, to him, then to their hands, still clasped between them. "Uh."
Bafflement was evidently the word of the day. His body language was an awkward jumble that made him look like he wanted to both flee and sidle closer at the same time.
Part of Victus' multitoned voice completely abandoned the human hearing range as it dropped into frequencies that Shepard half-heard and half-felt through the shiver of his hands around hers. "Garrus."
Shepard wasn't exactly sure what that sort of purr meant to turians, but she could guess from the wide-eyed look of sudden, surprised, interest on Garrus' face. Oh yes, now she could see it. Not exactly how he looked at her, but something similar.
Victus turned his head to regard Garrus while his finger continued to circle Shepard's palm in tiny. distracting. circles. that made her wonder where else he could touch so deftly. "Why don't you join us?"
Garrus only hesitated for a moment before finishing his descent down the stairs. "Um...now?," he said, looking at Shepard questioningly.
She reluctantly slid her hands out from between Victus' so she could shuffle over and let Garrus sit nearest to him. She shared a smile with Victus. "No better time." She patted the seat with her still-tingling palm. "Come on, big guy. I've got your six."
----
That night, as the two of them settled into bed, Garrus said, "In my defense, I honestly thought that it was off the table."
She chuckled. "That's what you get for listening to the vids."
"The only multiple-partner ones with humans were porn! I got the feeling it was extremely kinky."
"It doesn't have to be." She waited until he wrapped himself in his sheet before settling back against the built-in heater of his chest. "Don't worry about it. You were going off the assumption that I was assuming monogamy, and you weren't wrong. I'd just...never thought about it. No one ever asked."
"I'm glad that Adrien is a braver man than I."
She laughed and tilted her head back, pulling on his cowl until she could feel his forehead touch the top of her skull. "Is this a bad idea?" he asked into her hair. "What am I saying? This is such a bad idea."
"Oh, yeah," she murmured. "But when has that ever stopped us?"
"Never," he said, wrapping his arm around her.
"Damn right."
No guts, no glory.