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The Doctor had only himself to blame for this mess. He had intended to take Rose to the Rapunzalarian Lantern Festival, and had completely missed the mark, instead landing in the middle of Rapunzalaria’s harsh winter. Not only was it bitterly cold, but they were also in the midst of a nasty outbreak of Zalarian Flu. The Doctor was immune, Rose was not.
Fortunately, it wasn’t deadly for humans. It was a miserable inconvenience and she’d feel like she was hit by a lorry. The worst part was the hacking, exhausting cough. He had cough syrup, but he warned her, “It’ll make you really loopy for a few hours.”
“I don’t bloody care….” she began, interrupted by another round of horrendous hacking. “Now. Give it to me now.” He did.
And it worked. She stopped coughing. However, she was currently wrapped in a quilt on her bed, giggling at the ceiling. “Ohhhh Doctor…” she sing-songed. “Helloooo, Doctor!” She had another giggle fit as the Doctor sat on her bed. He felt her forehead. “You take such good care of me. You do. You help me when I’m sick…you take me to such lovely places. I’ll tell you a little secret though...sometimes I just wanna stare at you and not the scenery. Your eyes are gorgeous.”
“Uhhhmm, Rose...maybe you’d better rest.”.
As Rose rambled on, her speech became a bit slurred. “And your hands. Wow. They’re so..manly. Love holdin’ em. You make me so happy. Do you know how happy I am runnin’ with you?” . She was dozing off even as she spoke. Before she gave into sleep completely she mumbled, “I love you, Doctor.”
The Doctor’s respiratory bypass kicked in at her words. What he really needed to do was pack her up and send her back to Jackie to live out a safe life. There were so many reason why he shouldn’t and couldn’t love her back but Rassilon help him, he did. And he knew he wouldn’t take her home.
*****
When Rose was well again they resumed their running through space and time. She didn’t mention anything about the day she was loopy on cough syrup, and he didn’t bring it up.
The coward in him hoped she wouldn’t remember what she said under the influence of the cough medicine. He hoped they could go on just as they were. He could handle that. It was the way things were supposed to be. At least, that was what he told himself.
Except, he’d noticed her giving him curious looks. She’d started to ask him something a few times, then thought better of it. He felt a general sense of unease, as if they were heading toward some temporal tipping point that could change their relationship forever. The tension was mounting.
She entered the console room after showering one particularly messy adventure away. She wore shorts and vest top and looked inconsiderately adorable. She stood close to the console, looking at him. “Hullo,” the Doctor said, breaking the silence. He tried not to look at her but really, with her image already burned into his memory, it was a lost cause. “Somethin’ on your mind?”
Rose nodded. “Mmm...I remembered somethin’ when I was in the shower.”
“Good place for thinkin’, that.”
“I remembered some things I said when I was woozy on that cough syrup. Do you?”
The Doctor paused his tinkering, but he didn’t look up at Rose. This was it, he sensed. This was the big temporal tipping point. In his mind, their timeline didn’t resemble a line so much as a balance. He could deny remembering and the balance would tip back to being more than friends, but less than lovers. He could admit to it, and….things would have to change. As much as his life revolved around change, he was not particularly fond of it. Rose Tyler made him want to embrace change.
“Doctor?” she prompted. He looked up at her finally, and he was immediately overwhelmed by the hope in her expression. Rose Tyler was the bravest creature he’d ever met. He wanted to be brave for her. And in that moment, the balance tipped in his mind. Sod the Time Lord rules, he thought. I’m the last of them. I’ll make the rules this time.
“Yeah, I do. That okay?”
She must have seen something in his own eyes that she liked, because she smiled that tongue touched grin that made his knees go weak. “More than. I remember too. Is that okay?”
“It’s fantastic,” he told her, striding toward her, gently cupping her cheek when he reached her. Before he kissed her, he murmured, “Because I love you, too, Rose Tyler.”