Chapter Text
–JUNE 2, 2009–
It was Junhee’s thirteenth birthday, which was the last day of seventh grade—what a great present, right?
He’d been impatiently awaiting this day. All year, he’d watched as his classmates, one by one, received their marks—the marks that signified their soulmates.
The marks didn’t always appear on their thirteenth birthdays, but usually the first one appeared within a week. The rest of the marks would appear gradually until their fourteenth birthdays.
Junhee, however, was one of the lucky few whose marks appeared all at once. When he woke up that morning, the first thing he did was search his body for marks. The first one he found was on his left wrist, just below the palm of his hand: a simple triangle, completely filled with a dark purple color.
He stared at it for a full minute, letting it sink in that it was there—his first mark.
And then he dashed out of his room, calling “MOM!” as he did, which wasn’t specific enough, since there were three figures in that home who could be called “Mom.”
Junhee barged into his moms’ room, and one of them, Hajin, sat bolt upright in her bed, looking at Junhee with tired eyes. She was usually the first one awake, and would take Junhee to school, but she had overslept that morning.
“Hajin,” said Junhee, “wake up Yina and Yedam. I got my first mark!”
He then bolted to the kitchen and poured himself a bowl of cereal. He wolfed it down as quickly as he could—he wanted more than anything to get to school and show off his mark to anyone willing to look, even if he didn’t know anybody with a matching mark. Maybe somebody would know someone else who had a matching mark, and that person could introduce them.
Junhee had imagined for years what it’d be like to meet his first soulmate. Would they be a boy? A girl? Tall? Short? Kind? Funny? Would he be able to tell instantly when he met them, before he even saw their marks?
As Junhee was slurping the remaining milk from his cereal bowl, Hajin came up behind him and ruffled his hair. “You need to comb your hair,” she told him. Then she pressed a finger to the back of his neck and asked, “Is this your mark?”
Junhee slammed his empty bowl onto the table, his right hand flying to the spot she’d touched, as if slapping a bug that had landed there. “Is there a mark there?” he demanded.
“Is this not what you were talking about?” asked Hajin, surprised.
“This is the one I found,” replied Junhee, showing her his wrist.
“Wow,” she said, awed. “You have two marks.”
“Do you think that’s all of them, Hajin?” asked Junhee, tilting his head back as far as it could go to look at her.
Hajin laughed in reply. “Don’t get too ahead of yourself, kiddo. You still have a whole year before you’ll know for sure.”
“I hope it is just these two!” exclaimed Junhee, extending his arms toward Hajin. “I want to be just like you and Yina and Yedam.”
“I’m touched,” said Hajin, patting him on the shoulder. “But you should be just like you. And that means you should be taking a shower, because you smell.”
“Okay,” said Junhee with a smile. He put his cereal bowl in the dishwasher and rushed off to take a quick shower. As he scrubbed himself clean, he discovered two more marks—one on his shoulder, just below his collarbone, and another to the left of his belly button. Four marks.
Four soulmates, thought Junhee. That’s a lot. What if there are more?
But months passed, and it became clear to Junhee that this was it.
Four soulmates. Who could they be?
Junhee wanted to meet them.
–JULY 20, 2018–
Sehyoon and Eunsuh sat on their front porch, everything they would need for the next week packed into four bags. Three of them were Eunsuh’s—Yuna had insisted on packing Sehyoon’s bag, and had a knack for stuffing lots of things into a small space. Eunsuh had packed her own bags; Jisoo was a far more lenient parent than Yuna.
“They’re late,” said Eunsuh.
“They always are,” replied Sehyoon.
Eunsuh sighed. “Yuna’s gonna be pissed.”
As if on cue, the door opened, and Yuna stomped out onto the porch. She glared at Sehyoon. “Where are they?” she demanded.
Sehyoon unzipped a pocket on the side of his bag and took out his phone. He had one text from Yuchan.
Kang Yuchan: sorry yoonie!! we’re running a little late, since jason slept till like 1. we’ll be there in 3min
“Channie says they’ll be here in three minutes.”
“They’re already three minutes late,” muttered Yuna. “Any later, and you’re not going.”
“Yuna, they’re just late,” complained Eunsuh. “I know you’re technically forcing me to go on this trip, but I really do want to go. Just let it be, okay?”
Yuna looked at Eunsuh, eyes narrowing, and Sehyoon could see on her face that she wanted to voice her disagreement, but decided it was better not to get into an argument. She huffed and reentered the house.
Sehyoon let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. “Thanks, Eunsuh.”
Eunsuh smiled. “It’s no problem. Anything to protect you from your demon of a mother.”
Sehyoon laughed, though he didn’t agree. It was true that Yuna wasn’t the best parent, but he didn’t think she was a demon.
Sehyoon, Eunsuh, and their siblings shared seven parents, who had worked out a system in which each child had one parent who was primarily in charge of managing them. Yuna, Sehyoon’s assigned parent, was rather overprotective. For one, she wouldn’t let Sehyoon get a part-time job, since she thought it’d be too stressful. He’d wanted one since his senior year of high school. He was now three years graduated.
Possibly worse was her attitude toward his college education. Well—Sehyoon had to cut her some slack.
She had allowed him to go to college, thank God, but only on the terms that he would live at home and go only for two years to a nearby community college. Which, he supposed, was okay, since Yuchan ended up doing the same thing. But now those two years were over, and a year had passed. He was hoping to go to an actual university in the fall, but that was looking less and less likely by the day—despite his numerous acceptance letters, Yuna was difficult to please.
And for good reason, honestly. Sehyoon hadn’t exactly been upfront about sending in applications.
In other words, he did it under her nose with the help of Yuchan and Donghun (and Jason, who wouldn’t even think to miss out on a rebellion).
But by far, the worst thing Yuna did was keep Sehyoon inside. She had rules: the first rule was that he wasn’t allowed to go out on weekends, the second was that he had to be home before 8P.M., and the third was that he couldn’t be out for more than three hours. Though she claimed it was for his own good, her intent was clear.
She wanted to keep him away from his soulmates.
There were four of them: Junhee, Donghun, Yuchan, and Jason. They lived together on the ground floor of a two-flat not far from Sehyoon’s home—during the summer, at least. During the school year, it was just Donghun and Yuchan at home. Jason and Junhee lived on the campuses of their respective schools—Junhee a few hours away, and Jason a few days away.
Sehyoon loved them more than anything, and he’d been wanting to join them in their cozy apartment since he’d first visited it toward the end of senior year. However, Yuna insisted he wasn’t ready. Moreover, it was obvious to Sehyoon that she didn’t want them seeing each other at all.
Sehyoon had never understood why. If she wanted him to be okay, why did she insist on depriving him of the one thing that made him happy? And it wasn’t like she didn’t understand—she had soulmates, too. Six of them.
But at the end of the day, Yuna was simply doing what she thought was the best for Sehyoon. She wasn’t trying to ruin his life. Even if his own sister hated Yuna, Sehyoon couldn’t.
A filthy green minivan pulled up in front of the house, and the two rose to head toward it. As Eunsuh started walking down the porch steps, Sehyoon stopped at the top and said, “Shouldn’t we say goodbye?”
Eunsuh turned to look at Sehyoon, then at the front door, considering. After a moment, she said, “Let’s just go. We don’t want Yuna to change her mind, do we?”
“You’re right,” agreed Sehyoon, following her down the steps, his bag and one of hers in each hand.
They piled the four bags into the trunk, and when Sehyoon opened the car door, he was greeted by cheers.
“The party finally came!” shouted Jason, who was sitting in the middle row of seats. The other three let out another cheer in reply.
Sehyoon was filled with a familiar warmth, and he was hardly able to hold back a smile.
“Yoonie, you should sit by me,” said Jason. Then, leaning forward to look past Sehyoon, he continued, “Eunsuh, you don’t mind sitting in the back with Channie, do you?”
“Of course not!” replied Eunsuh. “I’ll probably just sleep anyway.”
Sehyoon stepped aside, and Donghun got out of the front seat to fold one of the middle seats forward so Eunsuh could climb in. Sehyoon climbed in once the seat was back in place.
Everyone was seated, and they were ready to go, but Junhee still had to ask: “You two got everything?”
“I hope so,” said Sehyoon. “I’m not going back into that house until next week. I think if I did now, I wouldn’t come out until next week.”
Soft chuckles punctuated Sehyoon’s remark, and he smiled again. Nothing beat the laughter of his soulmates.
“Alright, everyone,” said Junhee, “buckle your seatbelts. We don’t want to get in a car crash and never see Yoonie again.”
Donghun sighed. “Jun, seatbelts don’t lower the chances of a crash. They just lower the chances of dying in one.”
“In that case, why bother?” asked Jason, grinning.
“Because if Yuna finds out we weren’t wearing our seatbelts, she’ll probably kill one of you,” said Sehyoon. “Or all of you.”
“Let’s get out of here,” said Yuchan. “Just being in the proximity of the bitch is giving me the creeps.”
Eunsuh laughed. “‘The bitch’?”
Jason turned around to look at Eunsuh. “That’s her name, isn’t it?”
Junhee put the car in gear, and as he started to drive away, he spoke. “Let the final mission of Operation: Bring Sehyoon Home commence! Hun, could you brief us on our mission?”
Donghun laughed. “Everyone already knows what’s happening.”
“C’mon,” whined Junhee. “Just do it. Please.”
“Alright,” said Donghun, rolling his eyes. “After years of trying to appease the bitch with no success, we’ve come to the ultimate solution: what we’re calling a test run. We’re going—” Donghun stopped. “Eunsuh, why are you laughing?”
Eunsuh was giggling uncontrollably. “Sorry, I just— it’s just— it’s so funny that— that you all call her the bitch,” she managed between giggles.
“It’s because she’s a bitch,” said Junhee easily. “Continue, Hun.”
“Anyway,” continued Donghun, “about eight hours north of here is a small cabin in the woods, owned by Jun’s moms. Nearby is a river. We’ll be staying there for a week. And if that goes well, maybe the bitch will let Sehyoon move in with us. Finally.”
“Sounds like a solid plan to me,” said Eunsuh.
“Oh, and if it doesn’t work,” added Jason, “we’re just going to kidnap him. Permanently.”
“She’d probably rampage,” said Eunsuh worriedly, and Sehyoon nodded in agreement.
“She can just deal with it,” said Jason with a shrug. “She has to shut up after a while.”
“I don’t know...” started Sehyoon softly, but before he could continue, Yuchan spoke.
“Let’s change the subject.”
Everyone was silent for a moment, letting the topic settle with the dust on the floor.
“Oh!” said Junhee. “I almost forgot. We won’t have enough space to all sleep together.”
“Park Junhee,” hissed Donghun, “I cannot accept this.”
“Yeah!” said Jason. “It’s Yoonie’s first time spending the night with us, and he won’t even get the full experience? That’s bullshit!”
“Not my fault I only have three moms who decided to buy a three-person bed because there are three of them,” snapped Junhee. “I’m just as upset as the rest of you, you know.”
“Somebody text Jun’s moms that they’re full of shit,” said Jason. “From me.”
“On it,” said Donghun, already tapping away at his phone. “It’s from me, too. Hope that’s okay.”
“Of course that’s okay,” replied Jason. “The more, the better.”
“So three of us are sleeping in your moms’ bed,” said Yuchan. “What about the rest of us? Do we have to sleep on the floor?”
“No, there’s a queen bed in the basement. And there’s an air mattress for Eunsuh.” Junhee glanced at Eunsuh in the rearview mirror. “That’s okay, I hope?”
“Anything’s okay, as long as I’m not dead or dying,” said Eunsuh cheerfully.
“That’s the spirit!” cheered Junhee. “Yoonie, where do you want to sleep?”
“I...” Sehyoon wasn’t sure how to answer. Of course he wanted the big bed; it’d be weird not to want the big bed. But it felt like they were giving him the first pick, which didn’t seem fair. So he hesitated.
Before Sehyoon could continue, Donghun’s phone vibrated.
“What’d she say?” asked Jason.
“Yedam asked what they did,” replied Donghun. “What should I tell her?”
“Tell her she missed two marks, and they’re on her elbows.”
Donghun chuckled and sent the message.
“Add me to that chat,” said Yuchan, taking out his phone. “I wanna see what she says.”
“Add Yoonie too,” said Jason.
“I’m just gonna add all of you.”
To Park Yedam, Park Yina, Park Hajin, Lee Donghun, Park Junhee, Kim Jason, and Kang Yuchan
Park Yedam: Very funny.
Park Yina sent a photo.
Park Yina: They’re there tho...?
Kim Jason: omfg how did you draw those on your elbows
Kim Jason: and so fast too
Kang Yuchan: this is sorcery
Kang Yuchan: yina’s a witch
Park Yina: I’m telling you, they were there all along.
Park Yina: Guess yedam just never noticed them
Park Yedam: I just looked at my elbows in the mirror, and I see no marks.
Kim Jason: send proof
Lee Donghun: this is hilarious
Park Hajin: Please stop texting me. I’m at work.
Kim Jason: just mute
Lee Donghun removed Park Hajin from the conversation.
Kim Jason: smh
Kim Sehyoon: idk what i expected from junnie’s moms but it wasn’t this
Park Yina: Nice to finally meet you sehyoon. I’m yina
Park Yina: I’m the only cool mom. Yedam and hajin are lame
Kim Jason: what’s taking yedam so long anyway
Park Yina: probably trying to figure out how to use the camera
Kim Jason: smh
Kim Jason: hajin’s lame but at least she can use a phone
Lee Donghun: i would expect nothing less from park yedam
Park Yedam sent a photo.
Park Yedam: Donghun, Jason, I’m offended.
Park Yina sent a photo.
Park Yina: I definitely see marks
Kang Yuchan: i can’t believe this omfg
Kim Sehyoon: you edited that so fast
Park Yedam: How did you do that?
Park Yina: ~magic~
“Junnie, your moms are wild,” said Sehyoon, awed.
Junhee’s laugh rang through the car. “They really are something else, huh?”
“I want to see this wildness,” said Eunsuh, trying to look at the chat over Sehyoon’s shoulder. “Add me.”
To Park Yedam, Park Yina, Lee Donghun, Park Junhee, Kim Jason, Kang Yuchan, and Kim Eunsuh
Park Yedam: Yina...
Park Yedam: Excuse my language, but I’m kind of done with your shit.
Kim Eunsuh: omf what is even happening
Kim Sehyoon: hopefully nothing serious
Park Yina: fear not, children, for i, cool mom of your dreams, will go and solve this problem irl
Kim Jason: i’m not a child anymore
Park Yina: you’ll always be a child to me
Park Yina: seeya later kiddos. have fun up north
Kang Yuchan: thanks yina!! <3
Lee Donghun: we’re still not children but ok
Kim Eunsuh: i think i missed all the good stuff :(
Kim Jason: trust me, there’ll be more
Kim Jason: but why bother looking for the good shit from jun’s moms when you’ll be with the five of us for a week?
Kang Yuchan: ^^^^
Lee Donghun: he makes an excellent point actually
Lee Donghun: our jason is always full of surprises
Kim Sehyoon: rekt
Kim Jason: i don’t even have the energy to be offended
Kim Jason: since you assholes woke me up so early
Kang Yuchan: you’re fully awake don’t pull this shit
Lee Donghun: how is 1 early
Kim Sehyoon: genuine question
Kim Sehyoon: if i wake up in jason’s arms in the morning and he’s still asleep, what do i do?
Kang Yuchan: kick him in the dick
Kim Jason: oh yeah we need to figure out sleeping arrangements
Kang Yuchan: dammit no reaction
Kim Jason: you guys love me too much to do that to me :)
Lee Donghun: try me bitch
“Can you guys stop texting?” asked Junhee. “I feel kind of left out.”
“Sorry, Jun,” said Donghun, turning off his phone.
“We need to figure out the bed arrangements anyway,” added Byeongkwan. “Any ideas on how?”
“Well,” started Yuchan, “the bed for three is obviously favorable.”
“We could rotate,” suggested Junhee.
“Sounds great to me,” said Sehyoon.
“No, you don’t rotate,” said Jason, shaking his head. “You get to sleep in the big bed every night.”
“But that’s—”
“No, I agree with Jason,” said Junhee. “It’s only fair.”
The conversation died down for a moment, and Sehyoon’s face fell. It didn’t seem fair to him—he felt like they were making up for lost time.
“Six pairs, six nights,” said Yuchan suddenly. “It pans out.”
Nobody responded at first.
“What?” asked Jason.
Yuchan sighed. “It’s basic math.”
“Not all of us took honors math all four years of high school, Channie.”
“Don’t be like that, Dongdong,” complained Yuchan. “You took honors math all four years too.”
“Don’t assume I remember any math just because I took the class.”
“He just counted the number of pairs between you guys,” said Eunsuh. “Jesus. Graduates are so dumb.”
“Haven’t you graduated too?” asked Jason.
Eunsuh didn’t speak for a moment, and Sehyoon could sense that she was waiting for him to answer. When he didn’t, she said, “Uh, no?”
“Sounds like a lie to me,” said Donghun.
“It is,” confirmed Sehyoon, and Eunsuh smacked the back of his head. “She graduated this spring,” he continued, unfazed.
“Why are you like this?” she complained, exasperated.
“Like what?” asked Sehyoon, smiling slyly.
Eunsuh sighed. “Never mind,” she muttered.
“I have an idea,” said Jason.
“That tired brain of yours can come up with ideas?” teased Donghun. “I thought you didn’t even have the energy to be offended.”
“Still don’t,” said Jason. “Anyway, we can compete to see who gets to sleep with Yoonie in the big bed.”
“I’m participating,” blurted Sehyoon.
Jason cast him a sideways glance, eyebrows raised. “I haven’t even said what it was yet.”
“I don’t care,” said Sehyoon. “Say it, and I’ll earn a spot in that bed myself.”
Jason opened his mouth, then shut it. “I don’t think—”
“Just let him play,” said Donghun. “He clearly doesn’t want special treatment. Right, Sehyoon?”
Sehyoon nodded. Thank the lord Donghun was there to put his thoughts into words.
“Oh,” said Jason. “Sorry. I hadn’t thought of that.”
“It’s okay. I know it’s only because you would want special treatment,” teased Sehyoon, a mischievous smile on his lips.
“Maybe you should stop being so self-centered,” suggested Junhee.
“I’m not self-centered,” protested Jason, crossing his arms. “I’m self-assured.”
“Those aren’t even close to the same thing,” said Eunsuh, and car exploded into laughter.
Once his laughter had died down, Sehyoon reached over to Jason’s folded arms and gave his elbow a tug. His arms fell apart, his hand gracefully landing in Sehyoon’s. He turned to face him, pouting exaggeratedly.
Sehyoon tried to speak, but he couldn’t—Jason’s face was just too ridiculous—and he burst into laughter once more. “I—I appreciate the sentiment,” managed Sehyoon after a moment.
Jason laughed too—giggled, really, but he would certainly deny such a thing—and his rough hand curled around Sehyoon’s soft hand, squeezing it lightly.
They kept holding hands as they settled back into their previous positions.
“Anyway,” started Jason once more, “I was thinking we could play the alphabet game.”
“The alphabet game?” asked Junhee.
“Yeah,” replied Jason. “You know, the one where you try to complete the alphabet using only billboards and signs?”
“But I’m driving.”
“Oh, suck it up, Junnie. We’re rotating anyway.”
Junhee let out a sigh.
“Does anybody else object?” asked Jason, looking around the car.
“I’m cool,” said Donghun.
“I don’t think I’ll be able to see very well,” said Yuchan.
“Okay,” replied Jason, releasing Sehyoon’s hand. “You can move up here to the middle.”
“Alright.”
Sehyoon looked back and forth between Yuchan and Jason, eyes wild. “Wait, how—”
“He can just climb over,” said Jason, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
Before Sehyoon could ask whether that meant what he thought it did, Yuchan came crashing down face first into the seat between them, which answered his question.
It did, in fact, mean what Sehyoon thought it did.
“Oof,” said Donghun. “That was a rough fall. You alright?”
“I’m fine,” replied Yuchan, repositioning himself into his seat with a great deal of difficulty.
Junhee caught Sehyoon’s eye in the rearview mirror, and laughed as he turned his gaze back to the road. “You okay, Yoonie?”
Sehyoon was horrified. “Is—is that normal?”
“You’ll get used to it,” said Donghun. “They’re all kinda crazy.”
“Yeah, but in a car?”
Donghun shrugged, and it was clear to Sehyoon that he could provide no justification.
“Anyway,” said Jason again, more impatiently this time, “here are the rules. Only one letter per word, and the first one to call out the word gets the letter. No using someone’s else’s word. You have to go in order. The first three to finish get the big bed.”
“‘Madison,’” recited Donghun immediately, pointing at a sign. “A.”
And with that, the game had begun.
It didn’t take Jason long to get ahead of Donghun by a few letters, and Sehyoon wasn’t far behind. Yuchan struggled to catch up, remaining in fourth place for the entire trip. And Junhee...
Well, there were exceptions, of course. They all got stuck on J at the same time, but Jason found one first, and reclaimed the lead. One by one the others moved on, until they reached Q, and the same thing happened.
It’d been fifteen minutes since Sehyoon had called P, and the four of them were still looking anxiously for Qs.
“Jason,” said Sehyoon, his leg bouncing up and down anxiously, “what happens if we never find a Q and all end here?”
“Don’t be silly, Yoonie. We still have five hours before we get there. Someone will find a Q.”
“Five hours?” groaned Eunsuh, waking up from a nap. “It feels like it’s already been five hours.”
“It’s been three,” replied Yuchan, still closely watching every sign that passed by.
“It took you guys three hours to get to Q? Wow, you suck at this game.”
“Maybe Junnie will find an A,” said Donghun, earning a soft chuckle from the rest of the car.
“You bet I’ll find an A,” replied Junhee.
Everyone doubted it. Sehyoon could tell. Junhee could probably tell too.
For five minutes, the six of them sat in complete silence, still looking for Qs, and possibly As.
“‘Quality,’” said Junhee suddenly.
It took everyone a moment to realize what had just happened.
A tall sign passed the right side of the car.
It read Quality Inn.
“A,” finished Junhee.
“Park Junhee,” hissed Donghun, and the middle seat exploded into protests.
“You can’t just—”
“That had a Q in it, you bastard!”
“We’re never getting to Z, are we.”
“Sorry,” said Junhee, laughing. “I have to get myself in the running somehow.”
“Junnie, you’re still not in the running,” said Yuchan. “All you did was piss everyone off.”
“Whatever,” muttered Jason, sounding frustrated. “Just keep looking, I guess.”
And so they did.
It took thirty minutes for someone to find a Q, and, as expected, it was Jason. And before anyone else found a Q, Jason completed the alphabet.
“‘Unauthorized’!” he cried. “Z. I finished!”
“I can’t believe this,” muttered Donghun. “Junnie, I’m hungry. Can we stop at a Qdoba or something?”
“Careful, Hun,” warned Junhee. “I might take the B in Qdoba.”
“You won’t if I throttle you,” retorted Donghun.
“Well, that certainly is an interesting proposition,” remarked Junhee, a suggestive smile on his lips.
“Quit that,” snapped Donghun. “I’m looking up the nearest Qdoba.”
“‘Quest!’” said Sehyoon, pointing to a sign that read Laser Quest. “Q.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” muttered Donghun, continuing to look for a Qdoba on his phone.
“Sorry,” murmured Sehyoon.
“No, it’s okay,” said Donghun. “I’m not mad at you.”
“But you’re mad.”
“At myself,” he clarified, “for not seeing it. Junnie, if you take the next exit, there’ll be a Qdoba.”
“Alright,” replied Junhee, turning on his turn signal to make a lane change.
“Should we wake up Eunsuh?” asked Jason, looking back at her.
“She already fell asleep again?” asked Sehyoon, also looking back at her. And, sure enough, she was fast asleep once more.
“Looks like it,” said Jason.
“Wake up,” said Sehyoon, tapping her forehead repeatedly with his index finger. “We’re getting dinner.”
She stirred, and complained, “Leave me alone. I didn’t sleep at all last night.”
“Well, whose fault is that? You need to eat. Wake up.”
“QDOBA! Q!” shouted Yuchan, pointing frantically at a sign listing fast food restaurants in the area.
“Dammit!” cried Donghun.
With a groan, Eunsuh opened her eyes and leaned forward. She blinked a few times, then rubbed her eyes. “Why are you guys so loud?”
“Finding Qs,” replied Yuchan. “I think I’m gonna wait for Dongdong to find his Q before going on.”
“Oh my god, you blessing,” said Donghun, awed. “You were always my favorite, you know.”
Yuchan smiled brilliantly. “I know.”
“We’re choosing favorites now?” asked Sehyoon, pouting.
“Don’t worry, Yoonie,” assured Junhee. “You’re Jason’s favorite.”
Sehyoon looked at Jason. He expected him to deny it, but he only smiled back. Sehyoon opened his mouth, intending to ask “Really?” or murmur “Thank you,” or, even better, say “You’re my favorite too,” but all that came out was—
“What a sad life you must live.”
Everyone in the car laughed—even Sehyoon and Jason—as Junhee took an exit and headed toward the Qdoba. As soon as the restaurant itself was in sight, Donghun claimed the Q, and Jason made a point to tell them that once they were out of the car, the game would be put on pause. Donghun almost protested, but before he could, Junhee agreed with Jason; he didn’t want any disputes happening over dinner. And that was something everyone could agree to.
They began eating in complete silence, recovering from the tension of the alphabet game. After a few minutes, Eunsuh initiated a conversation; she probably felt uncomfortable with the silence.
“So, Junhee,” she started between bites, “what’s the house like?”
“Mm!” grunted Junhee, covering his mouth as he finished chewing and swallowed. “It’s a nice cabin in the woods. It’s kind of built on a slope, so even though the basement is technically a basement, there’s a door down there. A sliding glass door. I think we have an air hockey table down there, too. Um... the first floor is carpeted and feels really... homey. Oh, and there’s a loft. I think there were beds up there before we bought the cabin, but the sellers took them when we bought it. We never really used the loft for bedding anyway, so we just kept an air mattress up there in case we ever needed it.”
“So I’ll be up in the loft, then!” realized Eunsuh, eyes dazzling with excitement. “Will I be the first to use the air mattress?”
“No,” replied Jason. “I’ve used it a few times. I went up there a few times with Junnie and his moms, when we were younger.”
“Didn’t you say there was a river?” asked Sehyoon.
“Yeah,” replied Junhee, “but Hun was the one who said that. It’s called the Whiskey River.”
“It’s really more of a stream,” added Jason. “It’s really rocky, too, so crayfish live in there. Right—” he turned to Junhee— “we’ll need to get river shoes.”
“Mm, true,” replied Junhee, and the two began talking about when to resolve the issue. They discussed whether they should buy or rent shoes, when to take care of it, and where they should go depending on their choice. Sehyoon tuned them out after a while, since he didn’t really understand what they were talking about, and continued eating sluggishly, engulfed in his own personal bubble of silence. It wasn’t because he felt alone—no, he was trying to concentrate on eating.
Sehyoon had a strange—condition, he supposed, which made eating rather nauseating whenever he was nervous or upset, which was unfortunately often, or when he was excited. Although that transpired significantly less often, it happened to be the case now. Often he forced himself to eat, partially because he knew he had to, but mostly so he wouldn’t worry the people around him.
However, he had a limit. After eating about a third of the burrito he thought he’d be able to eat, he set it down on the wax paper it had come wrapped in and wiped off his slimy fingers.
“You need to eat more than that, Yoonie,” said Yuchan from across the table, and everyone looked at Sehyoon, then the partially-eaten burrito in front of him.
“Can you at least eat a little more?” asked Junhee, concern written all over his face.
“Maybe?” replied Sehyoon, unsure. “Gimme a minute. Burritos aren’t very friendly.”
“Probably because they’re inanimate,” said Donghun, taking a bite out of his own burrito.
Sehyoon chuckled softly, and the six of them fell silent once more. They only remained there for about ten more minutes. All of them finished their food except for Sehyoon, but he managed to eat enough to be satisfied with himself.
The six of them piled back into the car with the same seating arrangement as before: Junhee driving, Donghun in the front seat, Yuchan between Sehyoon and Jason in the middle seat, and Eunsuh directly behind Sehyoon in the backseat.
The alphabet game resumed. It went on relatively quickly from there; until Z, there weren’t any hard letters left to find. Even X was easy to find, since it was on every exit sign.
Observing the game was far from entertaining, if Jason and Eunsuh’s behavior had anything to say about it. Eunsuh went right to sleep, but Jason took his time. He made a comfortable pillow of Yuchan’s shoulder, and claimed his hand by lacing their fingers together. He lay there with his eyes open for a while, but within half an hour, he had fallen asleep.
Because Jason’s head was tucked neatly into the crook of his neck, Yuchan couldn’t turn his head to look out the window on his left. He could only use the window on his right and the window out front to complete his alphabet, while Donghun and Sehyoon could easily see everywhere out the car. As such, Sehyoon was the next one to complete the alphabet, and Donghun finished shortly afterward. And with that, the sleeping arrangements were decided: Donghun, Sehyoon, and Jason would share the big bed, and Junhee and Yuchan were left to the small one.
“Well,” said Yuchan, “now that that’s decided, there’s no point in finishing the alphabet.”
“You’re no fun,” Sehyoon told him, a small grin on his face.
“How far are we, Junnie?” asked Yuchan, ignoring Sehyoon.
“We’ve got about four hours to go,” replied Junhee.
“Oh, okay. I’m gonna sleep then.” Yuchan rested his head on top of Jason’s and closed his eyes.
Sehyoon then looked to Donghun, half expecting him to announce how he would be spending the next hour or so, but he didn’t say anything, so Sehyoon looked out the window, into the sky. The sun was setting, and a gradient of vibrant colors had spread across the sky, as if someone had spilled blue, orange, and pink paint into a puddle. Not a single cloud obscured it—a stark contrast from the gray, overcast sky back home. The sheer beauty of it put a smile on Sehyoon’s face and filled him with warmth.
“Junnie,” he said, “have you checked the weather for this week?”
“There won’t be a drop of rain all week,” replied Junhee, and Sehyoon could hear the smile in his voice—a sound that widened his own smile as he looked back out the window.
The highway was hardly a highway anymore; the exits were no longer numbered, and alongside the road was a field that stretched out as far as the eye could see. No words were in his mind as he looked out over the field; only a feeling.
The feeling was freedom.
Sehyoon watched the grains in the field rush by for a moment. Then, content with the view, he closed his eyes for a moment—or, at least, he only thought it’d been a moment.
When he came to, Yuchan was shaking him awake.
“Did I fall asleep?” asked Sehyoon, blinking the sleep out of his eyes.
“Yeah.” Yuchan stopped shaking him. “We’re almost there!”
Sehyoon looked out the window. It was dark out, but by the light of a streetlight, he spotted a lone Dairy Queen at an intersection up ahead.
“How close?” asked Sehyoon.
“We’re, like, ‘I remember that Dairy Queen’ close,” answered Jason. “I could probably walk there from here.”
Junhee took a left turn onto a gravel path, and they entered the woods. The path branched off several times, indicating that there was more than one log cabin out here on the Whiskey River in The Middle Of Nowhere, USA.
And then they had arrived. Once the car was parked in the garage, the six of them took bags out of the trunk and into the house.
Sehyoon found himself standing on a scratchy carpet that ended directly in front of him, replaced by a linoleum kitchen floor. The kitchen was charmingly small, as expected—on the right was a refrigerator, a stove and oven, and a small amount of counter space taken up by a toaster. The counter followed the wall around a corner and stretched out under a set of three tall windows that were evidently looking out over something, but Sehyoon couldn’t see out them in the dark of midnight. Directly below the middle window was a sink, after which the counter snaked around to form a sort of peninsula that acted as a partition between the kitchen and a dining area, which was empty save for a table and six chairs pushed into it. Beyond the dining room was more, but it was too dark for Sehyoon to see what.
Junhee let out a sigh and looked around, smiling as he set down his bags. “Here at last.” He turned to Sehyoon. “Your room’s right here, Yoonie,” he said, and squeezed past Sehyoon into a hallway to his right. At the end of the hallway was a door, and on the left was another. Junhee opened the latter and flipped a lightswitch to reveal a large bed—just the right size for three people.
Sehyoon entered the room and set his bag down in a corner as Jason and Donghun entered behind him and did the same. After a moment, Junhee spoke again.
“C’mon, I’ll show you the bathroom.”
The three of them followed Junhee out of the bedroom and into the dining area, where Yuchan and Eunsuh were waiting. The dining room split off on the left into an entry area leading to the front door—they’d entered through the garage—and on the right side of the entry area was an open door that led to the bathroom.
“Wow,” said Donghun, turning on the lights. “This is big.”
He was right. The bathroom was rather large—specifically, the ceiling was quite high. Overall, it was extremely nice, and had a feel of a luxury lodge atop a mountain.
It was the only luxurious room in the house.
Junhee showed them the living room, which lay beyond the dining room. It was very large, in terms of both floorspace and height—which made sense, because above was the loft. There was a TV with a satellite, and across from it were a few chairs and a couch, which sort of split the room in half. Behind the couch was a little more open space, and a table, and against the wall, under the stairs, there was what appeared to be an electric organ. Sehyoon found its presence surprising; he couldn’t help but wonder who played it.
Junhee didn’t show them the loft. He insisted there wasn’t much to see there. Instead, he led Donghun, Sehyoon, and Yuchan into the basement. Jason took Eunsuh up to the loft, though, so he could help her with the air mattress.
The basement wasn’t carpeted. The floor and walls were smooth white cement, which kind of dissipated the comfort of the floor above. The first basement room had a rug, a couch, some beanbag chairs, and a TV on a small cabinet. The cabinet was chock-full of movies Sehyoon didn’t recognize.
The second room hardly had anything in it, despite its large size—just a computer and an air hockey table. A few doorways led to another bathroom (which didn’t even have a door; the only thing providing privacy was a rug hung up over a horizontal bar), a utility room, and another bedroom, which was once more carpeted, and contained the queen bed Junhee and Yuchan would be sharing.
By then, they’d seen the whole house, and with a yawn, Junhee turned to them.
“Well, you two know where to go. I’m going to bed.”
“I guess I’ll go to bed too, then,” said Yuchan. “Good night, guys!” he added to Sehyoon and Donghun, disappearing into the bedroom.
They exchanged a few more goodnights and some kisses before Donghun and Sehyoon headed back upstairs. Jason was already back in their bedroom, digging through his duffel.
“Did Eunsuh go to bed already?” asked Sehyoon.
“I left her alone so she could unpack and stuff,” replied Jason, adding a pair of clean underwear to a small stack of clothes next to him as he zipped up the bag. “I’m gonna take a shower real quick.”
“Good,” said Donghun. “I was gonna kick you out of the bed for being smelly. This is better.”
Jason cracked a smile and shook his head before heading off to the bathroom without another word.
As Sehyoon sank into a chair in the corner to scroll through Twitter, Donghun changed into his pajamas (which flustered Sehyoon a lot) and climbed under the covers on the bed. Sehyoon really wasn’t focused on his Twitter feed; he was focused on the fact that he had no idea what he was supposed to be doing. Questions swirled around in his mind: Should I just change in front of him? Should I wait for Jason to get out of the bathroom and change in there? But those questions were hardly the biggest ones at hand.
How do I get into a bed when there’s already someone in it?
He’d cuddled with the others plenty, so that wasn’t the problem. But he’d never done it on a bed before, and he’d always slept alone, for as long as he could remember. The others were so used to living like this, and Sehyoon didn’t want to seem... uncomfortable. Awkward. Nervous. He just wanted to be normal. Even if he didn’t feel normal, being perceived as such would be enough.
On a whim of stupidity, Sehyoon thought Eunsuh might be able to help.
To Kim Eunsuh
Kim Sehyoon: how does one
Kim Sehyoon: like
Kim Sehyoon: get into bed with someone
Kim Eunsuh: lol wtf
Kim Eunsuh: why would i know???
Kim Sehyoon: idk you’re more socially adept than me
Kim Eunsuh: may i remind you that you’re the one with the soulmates
Kim Sehyoon: rip sorry
Kim Sehyoon: but haven’t you, like, at least messed around with other people who haven’t found theirs yet??
Kim Eunsuh: no
Kim Eunsuh: well
Kim Eunsuh: yes but nothing like THAT
Kim Eunsuh: and i KNOW you’ve messed around too ;)
Kim Sehyoon: ;;;
Kim Sehyoon: i have no idea what you’re talking about
Kim Eunsuh: sure you don’t
Kim Eunsuh: didn’t you commit all kinds of sins the first year you knew these guys?
Kim Sehyoon: that’s
Kim Sehyoon: ...
Kim Sehyoon: the only “sin” was the fact that none of you knew
Kim Eunsuh: i find that kind of doubtful tbh
Kim Sehyoon: ...
Kim Sehyoon: anyway
Kim Eunsuh: lol
Kim Sehyoon: but seriously what do i do?
Kim Eunsuh: what, is there not space or something?
Kim Sehyoon: no there is
Kim Sehyoon: i’m just completely lost when it comes to initiating things
Kim Eunsuh: well you came to the wrong person because i am incredibly inexperienced
Kim Sehyoon: ugh ok
Kim Eunsuh: why don’t u just... like...
Kim Eunsuh: climb in
Sehyoon looked up at Donghun, who was also on his phone.
“Aren’t you going to sleep?”
Donghun glanced at Sehyoon, then looked back down at his phone. “Nah. When you and Jason get into bed, you’ll just wake me up. So I’m waiting for you guys to get in.”
Sehyoon dipped his head guiltily. He’s been waiting for me.
“Ah, Yoonie, don’t worry about it,” said Donghun quickly, noticing his guilt. “Why don’t you put on your pajamas?”
“Uh—”
“I won’t look, if it bothers you.”
Sehyoon rose from his chair, leaving his phone behind. He walked over to his bag to get his pajamas, and changed into them.
“I’m done.”
Donghun looked up from his phone again, and upon seeing Sehyoon, he smiled warmly. He reached over and set his phone on the nightstand, then held his arms out to Sehyoon, beckoning for him to join him. “C’mere.”
Sehyoon, entire body jittery, climbed into the bed and under the covers, then awkwardly scooted across the mattress to close the gap between him and Donghun.
Donghun wrapped an arm around Sehyoon’s torso and gave him a light squeeze. “There’s the Yoonie I love,” he teased quietly, and tenderly pressed his lips to Sehyoon’s forehead for a moment.
Sehyoon felt his cheeks get warm, and to hide his blush, he buried his face in Donghun’s chest. This kind of intimacy was nothing new—who knew a mere bed could make him so flustered?
Sehyoon felt Donghun laugh as he gently ran his fingers through Sehyoon’s thick black hair. Sehyoon almost shuddered at the sensation; instead, he let out a contented sigh, which earned him another chuckle from Donghun.
Sehyoon heard the door creak, then click shut.
“Is he asleep?” asked Jason, evidently referring to Sehyoon.
“No,” answered Donghun, and Sehyoon felt his voice more than he heard it. “He just climbed in.”
“Man,” said Jason, awed. “You two are so cute together. I almost feel like I’m intruding.”
“Don’t be like that,” said Donghun. “Just get in.”
“Okay.”
Sehyoon heard the flip of a lightswitch, and footsteps moved toward the bed behind him before Jason spoke again.
“Are you sure he’s not asleep?”
“I’m awake,” said Sehyoon, moving his face out of Donghun’s chest so he could better be heard.
“Oh.”
Sehyoon felt the bed sag as Jason plopped down into it. He didn’t waste his time getting close to Sehyoon; within seconds, his arms had snaked their way around Sehyoon’s waist, and his chest was pressed against Sehyoon’s back. His nose brushed against the back of Sehyoon’s head, and he felt his breath on the back of his neck.
Sehyoon’s heart raced.
“Well, goodnight,” said Donghun, and the hand with which he’d been stroking Sehyoon’s hair came to rest on his shoulder.
“Goodnight,” replied Jason and Sehyoon simultaneously.
Donghun fell asleep fairly quickly—Sehyoon was no clock, but he estimated it’d been about fifteen minutes when his breathing slowed and his hand fell away from Sehyoon’s shoulder. Sehyoon couldn’t tell whether Jason was still awake. But it didn’t matter; what mattered was that Sehyoon was very much awake, and his pulse was roaring in his ears so loudly that he doubted he’d fall asleep anytime soon. Which wouldn’t be a problem if he was alone. The problem was that his heart was beating so hard that he worried it would wake up Donghun, or Jason, or both. He did his best to calm himself down so he could get to sleep, but nothing would work. He was about to let out a frustrated sigh when his fears became reality.
Jason let out a heavy sigh, almost directly into Sehyoon’s ear, since he was so close. He gave his hip a pat as he whispered, “Sleep, Yoonie.”
Sehyoon was silent for a moment, and so was everything else, except for the loud, rapid beating of his heart.
“I’m sorry,” whispered Sehyoon. “Did I wake you up?”
“No,” answered Jason, sliding his hand up Sehyoon’s torso and onto his chest, resting it directly over his heart. “I can tell you’re nervous. Why?”
“I’m worried I’ll wake him up.”
“You won’t. Don’t worry. Go to sleep.”
“But what if I wake you up?”
“I’ll make sure you fall asleep first. So go to sleep.”
Sehyoon lay still for a moment and blinked, as if blinking enough would wash away the darkness in the room. He wondered for a moment how Jason would know when he fell asleep, but he didn’t bother asking. He closed his eyes, relaxing as best he could into Jason, as if they’d melded together into a single being.
Jason gave Sehyoon a light squeeze with his arm, and pressed a kiss to the back of his shoulder.
“Good night.”