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“Did you and Newt have a dispute? I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed either one of you without each other.”
Thomas glanced over to Minho briefly before dropping his attention back to the map that was spread out in front of him on the table, “Good evening to you too, Minho,” Thomas drawled as the older Runner had walked in and stood at the front of the table to give Thomas an incredulous stare.
“C’mon man, why are you lurking here in the Gathering Room? Newt’s pissed to high hell and he’s scaring some of the other garden caretakers,” Minho stated, crossing his arms across his chest, he had his head slightly tilted to the side as he stared at Thomas.
“You know why he’s angry,” Thomas said, his kept his body pivoted away from Minho, his fingers curled into his palm, turning into a fist on the table. “We need to go back, we need to make sure that we haven’t abandoned anyone in need over there. It wouldn’t hurt to see if we can find any supplies, I know we’re still fine, but stocking up isn’t an awful thing.”
“It’s a bad move when you have to leave Newt behind, Thomas, you know how angry he was the last time,” Minho reminded him. “He was terrified of not knowing if we were okay.”
“I know,” Thomas murmured, relaxing his tense posture before standing straight to look at Minho. “I don’t want any of you to risk your lives over there and I know it’s dangerous.”
“It is,” Minho agreed softly. “The second trip was more successful than the last, but if we go this time again, you’ve got more to lose,” he continued. He saw Thomas bite at his bottom lip, “You have Clara now to worry about too.”
Thomas’ stomach clenched at his daughter’s name, she had been rescued by Thomas and his first group of explorers two years ago, Minho spotted the camp that only had 24 people in it, the majority were adults, some of them were slowly becoming Cranks, the others were young children and teenagers who hadn’t been snatched up by WICKED.
They saved four young adults, three teenagers, and three children under ten, Clara, the youngest of them, had immediately attached herself to Thomas and would not let go.
From what Thomas had learned on the way back home, Clara had lost her parents and her older sister to the Flare, while her older brother had been taken by WICKED; Thomas wondered if he was among the group of survivors back on their island. The most chilling thing he had learned was that her caretaker had killed herself two days earlier before Thomas had showed up, she ended her own life after discovering she had the Flare virus and Thomas had held Clara much tighter to him after hearing that.
Newt had taken to Clara within seconds, looking into her sad brown eyes that reminded him of Thomas’, she didn’t even say one word or fuss when he had plucked her from Thomas’ arms and hugged her close, which had been impressive, as she shied away from any other person.
After that, Thomas, Newt, Gally, and a couple of his builders came to their cabin and built on a room for Clara and the rest was history; she was adored by Thomas and Newt’s closest friends and by the other survivors on the island and she was the new and happiest joy of Thomas and Newt’s lives.
And she was now on the very short list of Thomas’ personal weaknesses, she was nestled right next to Newt’s name and Minho took advantage of that fact.
“You know I hate leaving Newt,” Thomas gritted out, “but he knows that I would never make you guys go out there by yourselves, so don’t drag my daughter into this to try and twist my arm in not going.”
“Not really twisting your arm when I know that you’re not going to go anyway,” Minho stated matter-of-factly with a shrug. He could see the defeat in Thomas’ eyes without him saying or expressing anything; they have lived on this island for nearly eight years and seeing Thomas almost every single day, he knew his friend very well.
“I’m not arguing with you about this when I already heard it from Newt,” Thomas snapped, he shouldered by Minho, who just sighed at him when Thomas stalked outside. He was met with a warm breeze, it never was freezing on the island, maybe cool somedays, but Thomas was glad that they had warm weather almost every day.
“Da!”
Thomas’ bitter mood changed when he heard Clara’s cheerful voice and heard a pitter-patter of rushing, tiny feet coming towards him. He smiled and knelt down onto one knee and scooped his daughter into his arms and brushed some of her curly auburn hair out of her face, “Hi, Clare-bear,” he smiled, kissing her rosy cheeks.
“Da,” Clara smiled, kissing Thomas’ cheek in return. “Pa is sad,” she whispered, pouty lips turning into a frown in worry for her other father. “Make him happy?”
Thomas gave her a small smile, “I can try.”
“You know how?” Clara’s eyes widened.
“Yea, he does,” Minho said, clapping Thomas on the shoulder as he passed his friend, he pressed a quick, affectionate kiss to Clara’s curls. He gave Thomas a meaningful look, “See you around?”
Thomas nodded at him, “Yea.”
“Good that,” Minho smiled and said goodbye to them before jogging off towards the middle of the village.
Clara glanced at her father again, “We make Papa happy again?”
“Sure thing, Girly,” Thomas nodded to her. “What do you think would make Papa happy?”
“Shells!” Clara exclaimed, clapping her small hands together. She then had a serious look on her face, “And flowers, flowers always make Papa happy,” she concluded with a nod.
Thomas couldn’t help but grin at her expression; despite her not being biologically theirs, Clara reminded him so much of Newt that his heart flipflopped in his chest. He kissed her cheek again, “Okay, let’s go then.”
Clara squirmed to be put down and she grabbed Thomas’ hand and eagerly pulled him forward, “Shore!” she squealed happily.
“Thomas!”
The former Runner turned his head when he heard his name being called and he saw Brenda rushing towards him, “Hang on, Clare,” he said gently, holding her hand to stop her from running off without him.
“Thank God she found you,” Brenda gasped. She knelt down and hugged Clara close, “Clara, you know you can’t run off like that,” she scolded softly before standing back up.
“I wanted Da,” Clara murmured shyly, moving to stand behind her father’s legs.
Thomas patted the top of her head, “Don’t worry about it, Brenda,” he reassured her, “we’re going to the shore to collect some shells and flowers, you wanna go?”
“I can’t,” Brenda gave him an apologetic look, “I promised Harriet I’d help her redecorate her cabin, since Sonya and Aris are useless at it,” she mused.
“You and fashion?” Thomas raised an eyebrow.
“Remember when you first met me?” Brenda asked him. She smiled when Thomas had hummed and nodded at the memory, “I’m good at style.”
“Okay, I won’t argue with that,” Thomas mused; Brenda could take some of those tourists’ clothes that were obviously eyesores and make them into nicer looking clothes, like Clara was currently wearing a cute purple and white tie-dyed dress that Brenda had made and made her another handful of outfits.
“Shore!” Clara reminded her father impatiently, poking him in the knee.
“Okay, okay,” Thomas sighed, “sorry, Brenda, I’ll catch you later.”
“Sure thing, Tomboy,” Brenda smiled and waved goodbye to them. She smiled brightly as she watched them run off toward the beach, watched Thomas kick off his boots and socks, while Clara had already abandoned her sandals and was in the sand.
Clara was in the wet sand, combing through it to find any pretty shells, Thomas rolled up his jeans to the middle of his calves and was doing the same just a few spaces away from his daughter, he would find a couple and toss them onto the dry sand, he’d let Clara pick through them to find which ones she liked most, let them dry in the sun, then she’d find out what to make of them.
Thomas wondered what she’d make next, they had a couple shell windchimes hanging outside their cabin and made a shell chain that they lined their windowsill with. He heard her humming to herself and he was satisfied by the small pile he had, he told her that they were going to leave in a few minutes, as the sun was starting to set and he didn’t want her to get cold.
“Flowers?” Clara asked, washing her hands in the water. She patted her hands dry on her dress and went to her father, she inspected the pile of shells Thomas had left her to pick through.
“Tomorrow,” Thomas promised her, he poked at her pouty cheeks. “It’s time for dinner, then bath time, and then bedtime, we can go flower picking tomorrow.”
“Kay,” Clara complied, dragging her toes through the soft sand. She grabbed some of the shells and started to put them in Thomas’ pockets, “Carry, please?”
Thomas smiled to her and put the shells into his pockets until they were stored away, “Ready?” he dusted off his hands before offering his hand to his daughter, who happily held his with both of her much smaller hands.
“Pa?” Clara asked, looking up at Thomas with worried eyes.
It was rather unusual for Newt to avoid Thomas for such a long period of time, especially when he hasn’t seen Clara all day, or bothered to come looking for her, maybe Newt just assumed that Thomas had Clara? Or maybe Brenda had let Newt know that Thomas had her was just letting them have a day together.
“He’s probably home, let’s go see him,” Thomas said, sweeping her up and put her on his shoulders and carefully gathered their shoes. He walked to their home and he saw that the lanterns were on, he dropped their shoes beside the front door and he carefully put Clara back down on the ground, he started to lay the shells out on a stone so they would dry in the setting sun. He opened the door and Clara darted inside, he followed her inside and softly shut door behind him and shuffled forward until he stood by the kitchen table.
Clara saw her other father taking a pan out of the fire, “Pa!” she smiled, she waited until he had placed the iron pan on the flat stone to let it cool.
“Clara,” Newt smiled warmly and hugged his daughter, “did you have fun today?”
“Yes!” Clara nodded vigorously, “Da picked shells! Will shells make you happy?”
“I’m happy with whatever you bring me, sweetheart,” Newt replied. “Go grab your pajamas and we’ll get your bath started, all right?” he told her.
“Kay,” Carla said and dashed off to her bedroom.
Thomas thought the temperature dropped a little when Newt stood up and avoided looking at him, “Newt—”
“Enough, Thomas,” Newt cut him off sharply. “I’m taking Clara back to the ship, we’re staying there tonight.”
A cold pain settled in Thomas’ stomach, “Newt, I’m not—”
“I don’t want to hear it,” Newt interrupted him again. He saw Clara coming back with her pajamas, “Let me pack some dinner up and we can go, okay, Clare?” he said to his daughter.
Clara frowned, “No dinner here?”
“Not tonight, sweetie,” Newt shook his head as he started to pack up some rolls and the chicken stew he put into wooden bowls and put lids over them. He put them in the wicker basket that Sonya had weaved him as a gift, he rolled the pajamas and put them in the basket too, he grabbed Clara’s hand gently, “We’ll see you tomorrow, please don’t forget to eat,” Newt said, looking outside and walked out.
Thomas saw Clara frown and tugging at Newt’s hand worriedly, until the door closed and he couldn’t see them anymore. He let out a shuddery breath and dropped onto one of the kitchen table chairs, he knew it wouldn’t last long, Newt’s temper never lasted longer than a few hours now because they had Clara, they always want her to be happy and she was never happy when her two-favorite people were not with her, but it still hurt nonetheless.
They still loved each other deeply, they still worried about each other constantly, but they did have their disputes sometimes, like if Thomas left his boots in the middle of floor, or if Newt worked himself too hard and irritated his leg but wouldn’t rest until Thomas forcefully pulled him to bed and held him until they fell asleep.
He never felt alone in their cabin, it was so quiet, which he never noticed, as before it was filled with their voices, their laughter, hushed whispers as they cuddled in their bed, as of recently, their daughter’s joyous laughter, her skipping through the cabin, or her excited voiced stories of what she did that day.
Thomas thought the silence was going to drive him insane and he quickly left through the backdoor of the cabin and jogged down the path that lead them to shore, the moon was bright and lit up the white sand, he listened to the waves crash against the land, he looked to his far right and he saw the ship, its dining hall was lit up and he saw some people in there, he couldn’t see the room that he and Newt had claimed, as it was on the other side.
He sighed and found the carved log that he and Newt sat on sometimes, when they just wanted to sit and listen to the waves. Thomas did just that, he sprawled across the log, using his jacket to pillow his head and stared up at the bright stars.
He didn’t even remember falling asleep.
“Rise and shine, Greenie!”
Thomas was startled awake when he felt himself being shoved off the log and ended up with a mouthful of sand that he spluttered out and glared at Gally, who was giving him a smug smile, “What the hell was that for?”
“For worrying Newt and Clara,” Gally told him, the smile was gone and his hands were on his hips as he glared down at Thomas, who was still knelt in the sand. “Newt’s been too busy calming down Clara to come look for your sulking ass.”
“I wasn’t sulking,” Thomas huffed, standing up, dusting off his clothes. “I fell asleep out here.”
“Well, your kid is convinced that you’re dead somewhere and has been crying since they got back to your cabin, which was about an hour ago,” Gally told him. “C’mon, I’m surprised that Minho didn’t find you first, but then again, he was half asleep on this two-man search mission.”
Thomas rolled his eyes and started up the path towards his cabin, where the back door was open and he could hear Clara’s gut wrenching sobs and Newt’s trembling voice as he tried to calm her down, “Clara,” he called softly as soon as he stepped through the threshold of the door.
“Da!” Clara sobbed loudly, running towards him and clung to his neck when he swept her up. “You were gone!”
“I was asleep outside,” Thomas told her, his heart was nearly in pieces at her puffy cheeks and teary eyes. He heard Gally come through, he briefly glanced at his and Newt’s exchange, before the former Glade Keeper gave Thomas a curt nod before leaving the small family be.
Newt had his arms crossed and he was glaring at Thomas, his lips were pulled into a thin line, but Thomas knew he was worried, he could see the light tremble in his chin.
“You weren’t here, you didn’t eat!” Clara said in a teary voice that was muffled as she hid her face in her father’s neck. “Gone…”
Thomas rubbed her back, “I’m sorry, Clara, I didn’t mean to fright you,” he looked up to meet Newt’s eyes, “Either of you and I’m sorry.”
“You won’t go away anymore?” Clara asked softly, she pulled back to look at Thomas, eyes still watery.
“I won’t leave anymore,” Thomas swore, wiping her tears away with one hand, he saw Newt turn away, muffling a sob with his hand as he walked out the front door.
“Pa?” Clara shakily asked, watching her other father leave their home. She looked back at Thomas with confusion, “He’s sad,” she whispered.
“I know,” Thomas said just as softly. He kissed her forehead, “I’ll go talk to your papa, okay?”
“Come back home with Pa, okay?” Clara said, squishing Thomas’ cheeks lightly, while giving him a stern look.
Thomas nodded to her and he saw Minho standing at the front door, looking relieved, yet annoyed, “You can have a round at me later, just let me go talk to Newt, please,” he sighed. He handed his daughter off to his oldest friend when he simply nodded to Thomas and held open his arms for Clara, who went to him willingly.
“Come on, let’s go walk on the shore for a bit and then we’ll go to your swing,” Minho said to Clara and they went out the back door.
Thomas sucked in a slow breath before letting it out just as slow; he knew not to be afraid, but sometimes Newt’s wrath would have had a Griever or Janson turning tail and running for the hills.
He found Newt on another path that lead to two large palm trees, it had been a spot for them to rest under after working hard and occasionally a place where they had made out during their earlier days of their blooming relationship.
Newt was leaning against one of the palm trees, he stood ridged, his back to Thomas, and his hands were shoved into his jean pockets, and despite the warm cardigan that he had layered over a T-shirt, he was still shivering.
Thomas slowly approached from behind and gently placed the army green jacket he had been wearing over Newt’s shoulders, he frowned when Newt had flinched away from him, “Newt, stop,” he demanded.
Newt’s dark eyes met his, they were cold and he glowered at his husband, “You think that you have the right to be a slinthead to me right now?!” he shouted.
The former Runner didn’t flinch when Newt had raised his voice, “I’m not trying to be, I’m just telling you to stop turning away from me when I just want to talk,” Thomas calmly replied. “I’ve hurt you.”
“No shit, Thomas,” Newt growled, his hands were fists at his sides. “First you bloody want to leave again and go to that damned ruined place for a third time, and then you vanish during the night and break our daughter’s heart!”
“I’m not leaving,” Thomas stated, maintaining eye contact with Newt. “I promised that I wasn’t.”
“No, you promised that you weren’t going to up and—”
“I’m not leaving at all,” Thomas cut him off. He saw Newt’s eyes widen, “I don’t need to leave anymore, I have all that I want right here with me, where I need to stay and protect and cherish the both of you.”
“But you wouldn’t just let Minho go off on his own, you two have a Runner’s bond,” Newt said with disbelief.
“I do, but that doesn’t surpass my dedication to you and our daughter,” Thomas informed him. “It’ll always be you first in my life and now Clara too. I won’t leave you back here to take care of our daughter by yourself, I won’t make any unnecessary risks like that, not anymore.”
“Thomas, I swear, if you’re just saying this right now, I don’t know what I’ll do,” Newt said, his voice shook slightly as he blinked back tears.
“I’ll willingly let you flay me alive,” Thomas told him. “You know that I’m curious and I always have something to ask or go explore, but I never want to explore too far away from you and Clara. I know now that even if I go back there again for a third time, it’ll probably just be the same, why waste the resources?”
Newt stared at Thomas like he was a completely different person, “You’re serious,” he blinked and shook his head in disbelief when he took in the solemn expression Thomas was wearing.
“Maybe one day, when Clara is older, you and I and her can go exploring on our own, but right now, Clara needs us, and I’m not going to keep leaving my family,” Thomas earnestly stated. “And I’m sorry that I left you behind, I know how much you worry.”
“The second trip wasn’t all that bad,” Newt murmured, as that second heartache of worry and sadness brought him a new bundle of joy. He gripped the jacket that Thomas had put around him; it smelled just like him and could feel the anger and sadness leaving him. He didn’t turn away when Thomas came up to him and pulled him into his arms, he easily accepted the kiss that Thomas gave him, one hand cupped Thomas’ jaw, while the other threaded into his hair.
“I’m an idiot for thinking about leaving for a third time, because missing you just gets worse with each day,” Thomas confessed softly, moving to bury his face against the side of Newt’s neck, breathing him in deeply; he could faintly smell the body wash that lingered and the smell of light of cotton.
Newt was shaking his head and guiding Thomas back up to kiss him again, “Stop talking about it, you promised me that you won’t go back, I believe you,” he stated as he kissed Thomas breathless. He felt Thomas’ hands gripping his waist and he pulled Thomas as close as he could by his beltloops, “I’m sorry for how I acted.”
“My fault,” Thomas murmured, breathing a little raggedly. He gripped Newt from behind his thighs and lifted the blonde, who wrapped his legs around Thomas’ waist, and pushed Newt against the tree. He had to look up as Newt was now above him, he easily held Newt there as he pulled out his necklace that Newt had made him from under the collar of his shirt, it rested with the other necklace that Newt had given him that night at WICKED’s city, “We made a promise to each other,” he gripped the woven leather, “that we’d always have each other and that we’d never hide anything or never make promises that we couldn’t keep, and I swore all that to you and I’d sooner die than break your trust.”
Newt could feel the heat building up behind his eyes and he could only nod his head, if he tried to speak, he knew his voice would break and he’d end up being a blubbering mess. He stared at the dark leather before cupping Thomas’ face and kissed him slowly, “I love you, Tommy,” he whispered. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against Thomas’, “I always will.”
“I love you too,” Thomas breathed. He eased Newt back to the ground until they stood together, both hands intertwined as they shared another slow kiss, until they separated and gazed into each other’s eyes.
“Da, Pa!”
They both turned when they heard their daughter’s voice and saw her racing towards them, yellow flowers in her hands, her light blue dress blew behind her as she came towards them, and behind her, Minho jogged slowly after her, adorning a white flower crown in his dark hair.
Thomas crouched down and opening his arms to pick her up, she was smushed between him and Newt, but she didn’t seem to mind, as she was smiling brightly at him, shoving flowers in his face, which had Newt giggling when Thomas sneezed.
Minho just smiled at the sight; he really was happy for his friends and his heart only warmed more when he saw how happy they were with each other and how their happiness only amplified when their daughter was there with them.
“All better?” Clara asked looking at both of her fathers.
“All better,” Thomas echoed her, kissing her cheek, while Newt kissed the other; the both of them smiled at her giggles.
Thomas concluded that his new journey was to start here officially, his new journey was to watch his daughter grow with Newt by his side, his adventures were to make a new, loving memory each day with his husband; he had a long life planned journey before him and it started with his two most beloved people right here in his arms.