Chapter Text
taehyun: B IT HC
taehyun: HOW DARE YOU
sungwoon: ?????????
taehyun: I CANT BELIEVE
taehyun: MY BEST HOE
taehyun: WOULD BETRA Y ME LIKE THIS
sungwoon: WHAT DID I DO
taehyun: >:(((
taehyun: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zNfvMNObK4
taehyun: WATHC IT AND WEEP
sungwoon: …
sungwoon: oh
sungwoon: i guess you’re cool
taehyun: I’M FREAKING HOT WHADDUP
sungwoon: wait
sungwoon: did you just
sungwoon: fucking DAB
sungwoon: ARE YOU FROM 2015 WTH
sungwoon: idk you anymore
taehyun: EXCUSE YOU
taehyun: I SLAYED THAT SHIT AND THAT’S ALL YOU GOTTA SAY ???
sungwoon: well
sungwoon: i was gonna applaud you for that perf
sungwoon: like whoa fam gimme your upper body strength
taehyun: never.mp3
sungwoon: but then you assaulted my eyes at the end
sungwoon: so now i’m just :\\\\\\\\
taehyun: my dancing could end your career and you know it
sungwoon: hm?
sungwoon: im sorry what was that
taehyun: :(
sungwoon: i couldn’t hear you over my awesomeness
taehyun: k whatever
taehyun: like comment subscribe pls
sungwoon: no
sungwoon: that’s too much work
sungwoon: try again
taehyun: i hate you
sungwoon: yea ik
sungwoon: <3
taehyun: bitch bye
sungwoon: oh also
taehyun: ?
sungwoon: daehwi likes it btw
taehyun: …….
sungwoon: you’re welcome ;)
***
my hoonie:
my hoonie: hi babe
my hoonie: miss me?
my niel: SKSKSKAALL KSKSKS SKSKSKS
my niel: WHT A THE FUCK
my niel: WHS Y
my hoonie: ?? :)
my hoonie: why what
my niel: WHY WOUL D YOU DO THIS OT ME
my hoonie: ^^ idk what you mean
my niel: jihoonie
my niel: darling
my hoonie: ? :)
my niel: why
my niel: must you make me feel like a sinner
my hoonie: o_O
my niel: you can’t just
my niel: be all cute and adorable and
my niel: angelic
my hoonie: oh
my niel: and expect me to not feel like the most impure demon on the planet
my niel: you have no right
my niel: NO RIGHT
my hoonie: :)
my niel: im in pain
my niel: no one said living on earth with an angel would be such agonizing torture
my hoonie: that was oddly poetic LOL
my niel: thanks i try
my hoonie: ^^
my niel: i would make an album dedicated to you if i could
my hoonie: oh
my niel: its what you deserve
my hoonie: aw stop it you <3
my niel: nope
my niel: im in too deep
my niel: gotta think of a tracklist now lol
my hoonie: oh god
my hoonie: please don’t give like super lame titles
my niel: hmm
my niel: how about
my niel: “the stars in your eyes”
my hoonie: …
my niel: it’ll be the title track
my hoonie: that’s so damn cheesy omg
my niel: ITS BOOTIFUL
my hoonie: not as bootiful as you amirite ;)
my niel: nope
my niel: all these stars in the night sky
my niel: and yet you shine brighter than all of them
my hoonie: *chokes*
my hoonie: *dies*
my niel: D:
my hoonie: sweetheart
my hoonie: honey
my niel: ?
my hoonie: you should stop before i force myself to slip into the pool again
my niel: nuuu hurry up and come up
my niel: i wanna cuddle
my hoonie: i swear you ask for cuddles every day
my niel: I HAVE NEEDS
my niel: AND THE RIGHT TO CUDDLE YOU WHENEVER I WANT
my hoonie: relax
my hoonie: i was on my way up anyway
my niel: ‼!
my niel: yay :D
my niel: i’ll be waiting <3
my hoonie: blegh
my niel: <3 <3 <3
my hoonie: <3
***
wanna burn down ymc and swings (11)
cloudy by yui: wow ok jihoon
the better pink sausage: what
cloudy by yui: you think youre hot shit because of your new hair well GUESS WHAT
nielmoyed: back off hyung >:(
cloudy by yui: I HAD RED HAIR FIRST
gallyang: um hi i exist hello
chamsae: yea hyung what about me >:(
the better pink sausage: omg chill hyung its not like i think im BETTER than you or anything
pearjin: wow that sounded fake as shit
mandu: if we’re being technical
the better pink sausage: oh excuse me sodu thank you for loving my red hair more than sungwoon hyung <3
tteongwu: minhyun looked the best
linlin: jihoonie hyung i think you look pretty~ <3
tteongwu: jihoon looks aight lets not kid ourselves
mandu: ok but all of your reds are dfiferent so theres no point in comparing ??
hwihwi: dfiferent
mandu: leave
nielmoyed: also @ sungwoon hyung
cloudy by yui: ignored
nielmoyed: jihoonie looks hot either way so
pearjin: why do yall always do this istg
nielmoyed: stay salty
the better pink sausage: <3
nielmoyed: <3
tteongwu: omg all of a sudden cherry jihoon is a thing now ?
gallyang: ok but where was cherry minhyun
chamsae: CHERRY WOOJIN FOR THE WIN
linlin: if i dye my hair red will i be cherry linlin
hwihwi: omg cherry linlin is the cutest thing ive heard today
mandu: ok where the frick are our tickets
mandu: what is taking our old leader so long
nielmoyed: well
nielmoyed: he’s old
gallyang: daniel behave
nielmoyed: :D
tteongwu: guys lets play a game ok i’ll go first
cloudy by yui: uM im the eldest so shouldn’t /i/ go first
pearjin: i dont wanna play
tteongwu: I’LL GO FIRST
mandu: ugh
tteongwu: i spy with my little eye something small
linlin: is it sungwoon hyung
cloudy by yui: WATCH IT GULLIVER
gallyang: how small is small
the better pink sausage: is it daniel’s patience
nielmoyed: hey >:(
chamsae: is it the brains of our management
pearjin: OH SHIT
tteongwu: i legit got chills
nielmoyed: im scared now
gallyang: woojin im not covering for you if you get in trouble i hope you know that
hwihwi: oh i know
hwihwi: its seongwoo hyung’s math skills
pearjin: no its his stamina
cloudy by yui: wtf jinyoung “dont wanna play” my ass
tteongwu: i … came out to have a good time
gallyang: oh my god
the better pink sausage: THAT IS SO OLD HYUNG WTF
tteongwu: and im honestly feeling so attacked right now???
cloudy by yui: i legit almost cried
gallyang: same
cloudy by yui: seongwoo you have no idea how much i wanna throw my luggage at your face right now
nielmoyed: ooh can i join
cloudy by yui: how dare you bring up an old meme
cloudy by yui: now IM the one feeling attacked
pearjin: this is so sad alexa play never
cloudy by yui: THOSE ARENT FUNNY STOP
gallyang: daniel is over here laughing his head off
gallyang: not that that says much but w/e
mandu: its his eye
hwihwi: ???
the better pink sausage: huh
mandu: he said i spy with my LITTLE eye
cloudy by yui: …
tteongwu: …
gallyang: jaehwan he cant even SEE his eye
mandu: HE COULD BE LOOKING IN A MIRROR BRUH IDK
tteongwu: no you all suck
chamsae: or maybe you suck at giving clues
the better pink sausage: lmao true
nielmoyed: HYUNG IS HERE
pearjin: FINALLY
tteongwu: k well
tteongwu: the answer was my love for all you losers xoxo
tteongwu: i hope you all get the mean flight attendant
***
seonho: have you landed yet
seonho: hyung
seonho: hyunggggg
seonho: hyunnnnngggggggggg
seonho: …
seonho: ok well you’re probably still in the air so imma just spam you
seonho: first of all wooseok hyung says hi
seonho: well all of the pentagon hyungs say hi
seonho: but wooseok hyung especially misses you
seonho: he said to call him when you land BUT CALL ME FIRST OKAY
seonho: yuqi noona and shuhua noona say hi too
seonho: OH and eunbin noona says hi too
seonho: they said to bring them snacks
seonho: that means you better bring me snacks too
seonho: drink lots of water hyung!
seonho: and don’t forget to stretch!
seonho: go out there and kill it tonight <3
seonho: i miss you lots so hurry back to korea when you can and come visit meeeee
seonho: you better promise me linnie hyung!
***
guanlin: omg seonho hi
guanlin: sorry we just got to the hotel! my phone was dead so i had to charge it
seonho: YAY YOU’RE ALIVE
guanlin: ofc i’m alive ^^
guanlin: did you wanna facetime
guanlin: it’ll have to be quick tho we gotta rehearse at the venue
seonho: yee yee :D
***
“Hyung, I’m gonna FaceTime with Seonho!” Guanlin called out from his spot near the wall where his phone was charging.
“Make it quick,” Minhyun said, one hand texting on his phone while the other was stuffing spare clothes and toiletries into his backpack. “We have to go soon or we’ll be late.”
“I will!”
Guanlin pushed the call button. The dial tone rang for a second until Seonho immediately picked up and his face filled up the screen.
“Hi, hyung!”
Guanlin grinned. “Hey, there. How is everything?”
“Same old, same old,” Seonho said, fiddling with the filters. Guanlin could see his friend strolling through the hallways of Cube Entertainment and could hear the trainees and artists bustling and practicing in the background. “How was the flight?”
“Meh,” Guanlin muttered, moving closer to the window for better lighting. “I fell asleep, so it was whatever.”
“I see,” Seonho nodded, pensive. “Did you eat yet?”
Guanlin shook his head. “I wasn’t hungry.”
“You have to eat before the concert, hyung!” Seonho urged. “Not too much or your stomach will hurt, but eat something!”
Guanlin knew this already, but humored his dongsaeng by nodding and saying, “I will, Seonho, don’t worry.”
Seonho hummed, and Guanlin could see him move towards a door that led into one of the dance studios. Seonho knocked twice and entered (without waiting for a response) and Guanlin suddenly heard a myriad of voices which he could immediately recognize as Seonho moved closer to the group.
“Guys, Guanlin is on the phone!”
“Guanlin?”
“Guanlinie?”
“Ooh, our superstar!”
“How are you?”
“Hi, Guanlin!”
“Where are you?”
“He’s in Malaysia,” Seonho answered. “He’s about to go though, so say hi, everyone!”
“Hi, Guanlin!”
“Guanlin, hello!”
“Guys, one at a time!”
“Eldest first.”
Seonho handed the phone to Eunbin who smiled brightly upon seeing her cute dongsaeng. “Guanlinie!”
Guanlin couldn’t help a small blush as his cheeks rose from smiling. “Hi, noona.”
“How are you? Are you well?”
Guanlin chuckled. “I’m fine, noona. Just a little tired, as always.”
“As always? That’s not good,” Eunbin scolded. “Are you sleeping enough?”
Guanlin shuffled a bit in his seat. “I slept on the plane.”
Eunbin gave a piercing stare. “…And?”
“And…?”
“Have you been sleeping for more than four hours in a bed?”
Guanlin cheekily turned around to bring the hotel bed in frame. “Hotels have beds, noona.”
Eunbin scoffed, clearly not impressed with the poor response. “So no.” Before Guanlin could sputter out an argument, she sighed, “Take care of yourself, Guanlin. Or I’m telling Wooseok-oppa and he’s not going to be happy.” She smiled softly. “There’s only one of you and we’re happy for you, bu—”
“Unnie, you’re taking too long!” The screen blurred and quickly focused on Yuqi and Shuhua. “Guanlin!” they shouted in unison.
Guanlin brightened. “Hello, noona. Have you eaten?”
Shuhua rolled her eyes. “Of course we have. Have you?”
Yuqi nodded with a laugh. “We’ve actually been eating too much.”
“I’ll eat later with the hyungs,” Guanlin said, avoiding their worried glances. “We have practice now so I’d rather not upset my stomach, you know?”
“Fair.” Yuqi said. “Ah! Seonho said you would bring us snacks!”
“True!” Shuhua added. “What are some popular snacks in Malaysia?”
“I wouldn’t know,” Guanlin said, a bit sheepish. “If I find anything, I’ll be sure to bring some back to Korea.”
Seonho poked his head into the frame. “Don’t forget to bring some back for me, too!”
“Yes, I’ll bring twice as many snacks for you, don’t worry,” Guanlin said, playfully rolling his eyes.
“Hyung is the best!”
“Have a good concert, Linlin!” Yuqi cheered. “Fighting!”
“Fighting, Guanlin!” Shuhua added, holding up a fist to her face.
Guanlin mimicked the action. “Thank you, guys. I wish you c—”
“Guanlin, we have to go.” Sungwoon urgently called from the other side of the room. “The venue is already packed with fans…” he muttered.
“Okay, I’m almost done!” Guanlin replied and turned back to his labelmates with a sympathetic glance. “I’m sorry, I have to go.”
“No, no, it’s fine!” Yuqi said, enthusiastic as always. “Have a good concert!”
“Bye, Guanlin!” Shuhua exclaimed before she and Yuqi both disappeared from the frame as Seonho took control of the phone again.
He smiled. “Good luck tonight, hyung!” he chirped happily. “Tell me how it goes!”
Guanlin nodded. “I will.”
“We’re rooting for you, superstar!”
“Of course,” Guanlin said, smiling wistfully. “I’ll see you soon.”
“Bye, hyung! Fighting!”
Guanlin waved, his lips pressed into a reluctant smile, before ending the call.
He sighed. The price of fame, he thought, but only for a brief moment because Minhyun and Sungwoon were already heading out the door.
***
95’s only (7)
minhyun: jjuyah
jonghyun: what
minhyun: care to explain to me why donghoe is threatening to bite you
minhyun: on instagram of all places
minki: lol
youngmin 1: “threatening” yea sure min
seongwoo: damn jjuyah
seongwoo: never thought you’d be the type
seongwoo: i am shook :O
jonghyun: ok first of all
jonghyun: no
jonghyun: second of all he never actually bit me you weirdos
jonghyun: yall need to chill
jonghyun: it was a joke and i asked him to say that so >_>
minhyun: ...
seongwoo: sus
youngmin 2: HAPPY BIRTHDAY DONGHO
dongho: minhyun you need to chill
dongho: and aww thanks youngmin!
youngmin 2: the kids hope to see you soon they miss you
dongho: likewise
youngmin 2: :)
dongho: yo minhyun where’s my gift
minhyun: what
dongho: >:(
minhyun: i’ll buy it in malaysia … ??
dongho: wow
dongho: so it’ll be late then
minhyun: dongho shut up we never do gifts
dongho: well maybe i want a gift this year
minhyun: I BOUGHT YOU SHIT FROM JAPAN AND AMERICA WAS THAT NOT ENOUGH
dongho: that doesn’t count
dongho: you flaker
seongwoo: hi sorry omg the staff was pissing me off
seongwoo: anyway HAPPY BIRTHDAY DONGHO YOU GORGEOUS HUMAN
seongwoo: deja vu was not appreciated enough and i am like
seongwoo: super offended ??
seongwoo: lemme steal all the trophies for you
seongwoo: a bop like that made by a king like you needs more love
dongho: LOL its fine seongwoo
dongho: i’m happy you enjoyed the song :)
dongho: and we never cared too much about the trophies
dongho: but thank you ^^
youngmin 1: someone come fetch minki
youngmin 1: he wont let me get up
minki: stop you’re comfy
minki: werent you the one who said you would protect me
youngmin 1: YEAH PROTECT YOU FROM DONGHO WHO’S NOT EVEN HERE
dongho: i wasn’t even mad tho
seongwoo: ooh can we talk about how dongho landed TWICE on the brand ranking this month
seongwoo: AND he beat me ???
seongwoo: legends only
dongho: i beat minhyun so that’s all that matters LOL
minhyun: i don’t like you
youngmin 1: oh about that
youngmin 1: im like
youngmin 1: lowkey salty that im not even in the ranking
youngmin 1: :((((
youngmin 1: i mean i don’t care THAT much but like
dongho: aww hyung
jonghyun: hyung we still love you
minki: tbh who cares
minki: we still have labiotte right so
minhyun: yo labiotte has some neat stuff they better let me model for them later
dongho: lol imagine if they don’t
seongwoo: the best joke of the century tbh
youngmin 1: well
youngmin 1: remember when minki said nu’est w would last forever
minki: oh my god choke
minhyun: wow
minki: i didn’t mean it like THAT j e su s
youngmin 1: lol sorry minhyun
minhyun: i feel
minhyun: so betrayed right now
dongho: rest in pieces bud :D