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Jinyoung didn't know at what point things between them began to become so different. Maybe it had been as early as when they first met, as soon as they tied for first place. Or perhaps it came later, once they shared a dorm together.
Or maybe it started once they were set to debut.
Either way, things began happening. In the beginning, it wasn't that off, it was normal. It was normal for friends to act the way they did, it was normal for friends to stay up late at night to talk, to share a bed. It was even normal to hold each other's hands, hug, and cuddle.
But friend's don't kiss. They don't feel each other's bodies on the nights they stay up late together, and friends don't fuck. But they were friends, and that was what they called it, what they told everyone. Sometimes they would use best friends. And as the time went on things continued to progress.
Even after JJ Project was cancelled, Jinyoung could clearly remember the way that they had cried that day, and the way that Jaebum angrily fucked him that night in the shower, just for them to cry again and swear to work harder.
Even when they were announced to be part of the new boy group, GOT7, the way that night Jaebum celebrated with Jinyoung.
Or even how after they debuted, that it didn't stop. That they would find ways, sneak around the dorm late at night. Jaebum always going to Jinyoung room, since he was the one who roomed alone. Or sneaking into the bathroom together.
That was one of Jinyoung's favorite times, when he sneak into the bathroom, a smile easily making it's way on his face as he watched Jaebum's form from behind the curtains move. How his voice was quiet as he sung tunes. Sometimes it would be famous songs, or American music. Other times it was their own songs, or songs that he was composing.
Either way, Jinyoung would always be shocked by both the visual and the sound.
But his favorite part came when he would slip into the shower, and how he would wrap his arms around Jaebum's wet torso, and how Jaebum would lean back into him. How it wouldn't even really escalate past soft and lazy kisses.
There was the late nights they shared, Jaebum always the first to fall asleep afterwards, and Jinyoung could only find himself to lie awake, hand twirling through Jaebum's hair, the other one rubbing reassuring circles down Jaebum's back. He would find himself lost in his thoughts, as he stared at Jaebum's sleeping face.
They weren't friends. As much as Jaebum liked to say that they were, that they were just friends, this wasn't what friends do. And even if they were just friends, Jinyoung was sure that no other friend would love him like Jaebum does, because he never did this with any of his other friends.
Not even with Mark who he always cuddles with.
Not with Jackson who he always holds hands with.
Not even with any of the maknaes.
This was exclusively Jaebum, just Jaebum.
But without fail, sleep would always push at Jinyoung's eyes, and he would yawn eventually. Once he got to that point, if the lamp on the side of his bed wasn't already turned off, he would turn it off, and then curl up into Jaebum's arms, and listen to the sound of his breathing. Heart beat like a steady drum, that without fail, always lulled him to sleep.
And in the morning, when Jinyoung woke up alone, he liked to pretend like it didn't hurt more than it probably should have.