Work Text:
Run Where The Lights Are
They will be reaching Winterfell by nightfall. He did not how he would face it. She will be everywhere. She should have been with him, and she would have been safe. He would have tried his best to keep her safe. She was the first person after Master Mott, even he had let Gendry go, who truly cared for him, trusted him, and what did he do? He tried to leave her.
He still hadn't talked to Jon about her. One more Stark whose trust he was breaking, but what could he say to him that would make it seem he wasn't trying to leave her. He was just trying to- actually, he didn't know what he was trying. True the Brotherhood did betray him, but even if they didn't, he was ready to join them. He was going to leave her. He would have made sure that she was back with her brother first and she would still have died at the Red Wedding-
But I would have been with her.
"Are you well Gendry?" Ser Davos asked, his voice laced with concern.
He nodded. He looked up and saw that they were almost at the gates of Winterfell and his heart started to hammer with anticipation. He didn't know what he expected. He just knew somehow being at Winterfell was important. She lived and breathed Winterfell. He would be closer to her than he had been in years.
"Are you sure? You seem awfully quiet."
"Just amazed at seeing Lord Stark's home." It was not a complete lie.
Ser Davos frowned. "You knew Lord Stark?"
Gendry mentally chided himself. "Yes, I did. He visited Master Mott's. He said he liked my helm." Gendry smiled, remembering what Lord Stark had said, "He knew I was Robert Baratheon's son, well bastard son, he told Master Mott if I ever wanted how to use a sword I go find him. Most likely wanted to teach me."
And another Stark did. Well, tried to. At least corrected my stance.
"He was a good man." Ser Davos said smiling. "Look at that we are here. Look at Jon, I don't think I have seen walking this fast, he is almost running. He must be excited to meet his sister."
Ah, yes. The elder Stark sister. My mother was a lady and my sister. It was as if she was standing in front of him telling him not to call her a lady.
"Are you going to fucking stand there all night or are you going to move." Hound said walking past him.
Gendry gritted his teeth as he and Ser Davos, who was still throwing him worried glances, followed The Hound.
He saw Winterfell for the first time. Before he could move forward, his eyes fell upon a small form walking towards Jon. He felt his heart stutter. He knew he would see her here. She would always be at Winterfell, but something was not right. She looked different. Her hair was longer. He looked at Jon, and saw him frozen in his place, Gendry’s gaze drifted back to her. He couldn't believe his eyes. She was alive. Happiness swelled in his chest, and he felt his throat constrict. She was at Winterfell. Jon had picked her up, and they were both crying. He didn't know when he started moving forward. She was talking with the Dragon Queen now. Suddenly, he stopped dead in his tracks. What if she didn't remember him? It had been many years since they last saw each other.
He looked up, and his heart dropped as she passed by him. After a moment, he saw her freeze and move back towards him. She closed her eyes like she thought he was a ghost.
"Arya, I would like you to meet Ser Davos and Gendry." She opened her eyes, and after so many years he found himself in beautiful stormy gray eyes of Arya Stark.
He still wasn't sure that he wasn't dreaming. What if he was? She took a step forward, and so did he. His eyes roamed over her face. She looked beautiful, and yet there was something behind those eyes that made his heart ache. He wanted to hold her in his arms so that he knew she was truly alive. He wanted to apologize for wanting to leave her. She raised her hand, and his heart was beating faster with every passing moment. It was like she suddenly remembered that she was almost about to touch him, and pulled her hand down. He didn't think it was possible for his heart to hurt this much.
"Arya." He saw her closing her eyes, and a plethora of emotions passed her face. Tears rolled down her cheeks, and he wanted to cry too. He was about to say something else what he didn't know, just something when she turned, and ran inside.
Someone cleared their throat, and he finally realized they had an audience, which included everybody. Jon was looking at him curiously.
"I thought she was dead." He closed his eyes. "I thought she was dead."
*
"So, were you ever going to tell me?" Jon asked him entering the forge later that night.
"No." He answered truthfully. "If something-" he cleared his throat not able to say the words. Now that she was alive he didn't even want to think about her being hurt or worse, "-something would have happened I wouldn't have."
There was an uncomfortable silence as he turned to look at Jon, who was looking at him intently. He didn't look angry just disappointed, and somehow it hurt worse. He looked away ashamed.
"I understand." Jon finally said.
His head jerked up. Jon's expressions didn't change, but there was something in his eyes. Understanding perhaps, but then maybe it was just wishful thinking.
"You do?" His voice caught in his throat.
"I don't like it," Jon said morosely, but then gave him a sad smile. "But yes I do."
Gendry didn't know what to say. He was beyond grateful. He genuinely liked Jon both as the King in the North, and as a friend. There weren't many people who Gendry considered as his friends. As fate would have it, both were Starks. When he met Jon all Gendry wanted to do was talk to Jon about Arya. That he was with her. That they were friends. That they laughed together. But then he would have had to tell Jon that he made her cry too. That he was going to leave her for the Brotherhood. That maybe, maybe she would've been alive if he was with her.
"I appreciate what you did for her," Jon said, breaking him out of his thoughts.
Gendry looked at him, shocked. "I didn't do anything. If anything you should be punishing me."
"Trying to find a place you belong isn't a crime, Gendry. If anyone is going to understand that, it would be me. I know what it feels like when you think that you don't belong. As for the you didn't do anything part, you knew she was a girl and didn't tell anyone."
"Yes, but-"
"You knew the company you were in. You did your best to keep her safe."
"She didn't need me. She did well on her own. She saved me. So many times."
"She did?" Jon asked pride filling his voice.
Gendry nodded. More times than she knows. He wanted to talk to her. Ask her everything. Tell her everything. But he knew she needed to figure out her emotions, her feelings. He remembered how haunted her eyes had looked. He couldn't imagine what horrors she had seen. He just wanted to erase them. Fill the darkness with the little bit of light that was left in him. Make her smile, make her laugh. Seeing her again just reminded him of how much he had missed her.
"She missed you too, you know." Gendry's heart started to hammer in his chest.
He gulped. "She did?" After a second of hesitation, he added." How do you know?"
Jon gave him another sad smile. "She told me."
*
It had been a couple of days since Arya first came to talk to him. It was a little awkward at first, but slowly and surely they were getting back to, or as close as to, what they used to be, but things were different now. She was different. Their conversations felt charged. The blush on her cheeks pronounced her beauty even more. Those mesmerizing gray eyes seemed even more enticing in the fire of the forge, like Valyrian steel.
She was sitting on the table in the forge watching him work. She did that a lot these days watch him work, and he couldn't explain the elation he felt ever time their eyes met. Her eyes smiled a little more, he knew that was mostly because of Jon, but sometimes he would let himself think that the tiniest amount of that happiness was because of him. Sometimes she brought him something to eat, that she nicked from the kitchen, even if it was her home, and it reminded him of old times. These were the times when he found himself smiling thinking about Arya, he reminded himself that he was still a bastard, and she was a Lady.
"So how many swords have you made till now?" Arya's voice came breaking him out of his thoughts. He turned and saw her sitting on the same table she always did. She looked beautiful, which she always did.
He shrugged. "Lots."
She rolled her eyes, a hint of a smile tugged at the corner of her mouth, and he felt his heart, the traitor, stutter. "Well, that's definitive."
Gendry laughed. "I don't keep a count. I just work hard, and try my best to make as many as possible."
Arya nodded. Once again there was silence, but unlike their initial conversations it wasn't awkward. It was… it was comfortable. He enjoyed her company. There were days when they didn't talk, but still knowing that she was around him, near him, made him feel better. Made him feel happier. He looked at her, and saw that Arya was biting her lips, and he knew there was something she wanted to ask but wasn't sure if she should.
"What is it?" He asked gently.
She looked up, a little shocked. "What is what?"
He sighed. "Arya."
"How did you know?"
"I just did."
He saw her contemplating whether she should ask him or not. She finally shrugged as if going fuck it.
"Did you-" She hesitated, "-did you even think about me sometimes?" Arya asked, her voice still the same, but there was an emotion to it. Anger? Longing? Hope? He couldn't tell. She was looking everywhere and anywhere but at him, and he wasn't going to tell her the truth unless Arya looks at him. He wanted her to see his face when he confessed. So she can know he was not lying. He waited, and finally, finally she looked up.
"To agree that I sometimes thought about you would mean that there were times that I didn't and that would be a lie, M'lady."
He saw her face going red and her breath hitch. But she didn't look away. She cleared her throat."That's good."
Before he could say anything, she hopped off the bench. "Um, I should go. I have to practice my sword play with Brienne, and Sansa and Jon must be looking for me." She said hurriedly.
He simply nodded. She was almost at the door when he couldn't help himself, "Did you? Think about me, I mean."
She turned, and gave him a shy smile. "Maybe."
*
He couldn't sleep. Tomorrow might be the last day. Tomorrow may be the last time he ever saw Arya. He had known what he was feeling for Arya was more than friendship. But today when she embraced him, he felt like... he felt like he was finally home. That here, with Arya, was where he belonged. He wanted to tell her then, but didn't know if she felt the same way. He knew she felt things between them changing too, but whether she felt same as he did, he didn't know. If she didn't, he didn't want to ruin whatever they have between them. If friendship is all he could have then he would be happy. At least he would be with her. There may come a day when she will choose someone else. He didn't want to think about it, but that was the truth, there will come a time when she will find someone he only hoped that she would be happy because her happiness was all that mattered to him. He just knew for him there would be no one else but her.
He gave up on sleeping because every time he closed his eyes Arya's muffled voice came into his mind telling him not to die. Every time he took a breath he could feel her near him, like she was still in his arms.
He groaned, and got up. He may as well see if the preparations were going well. He could hear the noises as the men prepared for what was to come.
As he grew closer to the Great Hall he felt his gaze drawn upwards, and saw Arya standing in the corridor. He wasn't surprised that she was awake too. She was looking at him, a soft smile on her face as she raised her hand to give him a small wave and his heart gave a small flip.
"Can't sleep either, huh?" See Davos's voice came from behind him. He jumped in surprise, and he could swear he heard Arya laugh. "Well then, let's join everyone in the Great Hall, no one could sleep, and then you will tell me why haven't you told Lady Arya that you are in love with her."
Gendry flushed. "Is it that obvious?"
"Yes it is." Ser Davos replied without hesitation.
*
"Sam, will you give us a moment." Jon said not taking his eyes off of him.
He was still slightly frustrated, but then he remembered what Jon must be thinking about what he and Arya were doing.
Because that is what you were almost doing.
He saw Sam nervously glance at him.
Sam hesitated. "Are you sure? I can tell him about the-"
"Don't worry, Sam. I just need to talk to Gendry about something." Jon said smiling gently.
"Okay. Good. So I'll just..okay." Sam mumbled as he walked out.
Gendry was growing nervous by the minute. He knew he should have talked to Jon first. He wanted to talk to Jon first, but then Arya started talking about the dresses, and then acorns, and then she blushed, her breath hitched, the pulse at the base of her neck was fluttering wildly, and then he was almost about to kiss her.
Jon cleared his throat. "So... were you really talking about acorns?"
"Yes." That wasn't a lie. They were talking about Acorns.
Jon hummed. The frustration Gendry was feeling was soon being replaced by dread. What if Jon asked him to leave? What if he didn't get to see Arya one last time before he left? What if he never got to tell Arya how he felt? What if-
"I know you and Arya like each other," Jon said quietly, his face expressionless. Before he could say anything Jon continued. "Knew it since the day we walked into Winterfell. Since Arya ran back to her chambers after seeing you. Since she first laughed because of you."
Gendry opened and closed his mouth. He didn't know what to say. The least he expected after Jon found out- that was a lie. He had no idea what he expected.
Yes, you did. It was castration.
"Are you going to say something or just stand there?"
"You know?" Was all he could manage.
Jon chuckled. "Everyone knows Gendry."
"We haven't- we weren't-" Gendry started.
"No. No, I don't want to know that. Just because I know doesn't mean we are going to talk about what happens between you and my sister." Jon sighed. "I don't think anyone is good enough for Arya, but if anyone would be nearly good enough, it would be you. So if you think I will oppose anything, you don't have to worry."
Gendry felt relief coursing through his veins. "Thank you, Jon."
Jon nodded. "Just so you know I will kill you if you hurt her, if she doesn't do it first."
*
"I love you too."
Gendry was sure his heart stopped for a moment. He knew happiness, most of it was because of Arya but this, this was beyond any happiness he has ever felt. He couldn't believe it, maybe he fell asleep, and this is a dream.
"Did you hear what I just said? Are you awake?" Arya asked hesitatingly. Her voice soft like she didn't want to wake him up if he was asleep.
He cleared his throat. "Yes, I did, and yes, I am."
"And?" Her hands ceasing their movement as she looked up at him.
"Are you sleepy?"
She frowned."No?"
"Are you sore?"
A slow smile took over her lips when she understood what he meant. "No."
"Good, because I want to show you."