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It all started with a quick visit to the Dowager Empress, nothing out of the usual, it was what they did weekly of course, but this time was different. When Anya and Dmitry entered the parlour room they were greeted with the enthusiastic yipping of a small spaniel as it bolted towards them. Anya squealed equally enthusiastically as the small dog, before scooping it up in her arms and cradling it flush against her chest.
Dmitry never really liked pets, living as a street rat pets were seen as a burden rather than a companion, plus being extremely allergic to them gave them another strike against their name. Anya crooned over the mutt, muttering about how adorable it was. "Isn't he just adorable Dmitry?" She held the mutt out towards him. He sneezed in reply, wiping at his runny nose before he could sneeze again. "Well I can't really say he's adorable when I can't be near him without sneezing or my throat closing" Anya pouted and cuddled the dog close to her again.
He could tell how much she wanted a pet, especially a dog, ever since she'd met the Dowager's dog Pooka, she'd been begging Dmitry to get one, but he always reminded her that he was allergic. She'd pout and they'd get into an argument and end up having steamy makeup sex, who was he to complain, she could beg him all she wanted, as long as it ends up with Anya sprawled across his chest, and a sheet covering their modesty, he was happy.
Anya refused to makeup unless she got her way, after another round of begging for a dog and Dmitry refusing and then an argument starting, instead of the usual heated kiss they share, Anya pouted and stormed off, headed in the direction of the guest bedroom. "Anya, darling" Dmitry followed her, trying to persuade her to come back, she stuck her nose high in the air before slamming the bedroom door shut, promptly locking it in Dmitry's face. "Anya, please. What do you want?" he slumped against the door, his heart heaving "I hate to see you like this"
She'd spent the whole night locked away in that room, Dmitry had fallen asleep slumped against the door, and hadn't noticed that Anya had unlocked it at some point during the night, the early morning sunrise was streaming across the hallway floor as he quietly opened the door and entered. He found Anya pretending to sleep on one half of the bed and he slowly curled up next to her.
"I'm sorry Anya" she turned to face him, only now looking up at him through half-lidded eyes. He noticed they were red and puffy, and he promptly placed two gentle kisses upon her closed lids. And so they came to a compromise, Anya and Dmitry would visit Pooka more often, and in a months time when the Dowager was out of town on business, they would happily look after the mutt. As long as he stayed clear of the damned thing, how bad could it be?
Dmitry would soon regret the compromise in the coming weeks. He soon learned that "Anya's widdle angel" as Anya referred to the mutt was not so little, or much of an angel. Pooka was always polite and contrite in front of Anya, laying gently in her lap and doing tricks for her whenever she pleased, but whenever he was left alone with the dog. It would take his spot on the couch next to Anya, so he'd have to stand, and it liked to steal his shoes, his newspapers and whatever else happened to be in its reach.
He hated the dog with a burning passion, and he was almost absolutely sure the dog hated him, growling at him whenever he approached. He was beginning to dread the day that they had to bring him home.
The day came sooner rather than later, as the Dowager had to rush off early, leaving poor Dmitry no time to prepare. Anya walked into the living room with a not so small Pooka trotting politely beside her. When Anya left to fetch some dog food, that was when the real fun began, Dmitry was already feeling his allergies kick in so he decided to barricade himself in his bedroom and let Anya deal with the mutt. He hadn't realised that he had left his favourite pair of shoes right next to the front door.
When Anya had reentered the townhouse she was meant with the reek of urine, blocking her nose she looked down at Pooka who was curled innocently next to the shoes "Did somebody do an oopsie in the house?" a small whine was his reply, she gently chastised the dog before letting him out to finish his business. She managed to examine the hallway to inspect the damage, and her heart stopped when she realised what Pooka had used as a toilet. Dmitry's favourite dress shoes that he'd just worn last night.
At that exact moment, her charming husband decided to enter, his eyes looked a little puffy and red, his allergies already kicking in. She wanted to cry, guilt rolling over her in tides. Dmitry stopped and surveyed the scene in front of him, Pooka sat innocently in the corner of the room as Anya held his favourite shoes at an arm's length, and she looked quite upset "Anya, what's wrong?" He made to move closer but the strong smell of urine hit him. And that's when he put two and two together.
He was positive that steam was emanating from his nostrils and ears. Anya smiled weakly. "I'm so sorry Dima, I'll buy you a new pair" Dmitry sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose before turning on his heel.
"I'm going to bed"
The trouble continued, Dmitry discovered that Pooka liked to steal things, especially his things. Dmitry had a very important dinner to attend, it was Lily's birthday after all, and Anya was already dressed and ready to go, it was Dmitry she was waiting on "Come on Dima, we're going to be late" Dmitry was running around the house like a headless chook. Dashing madly, one shoe tied, the other undone, his waistcoat was unbuttoned and flapping freely as he ran about the townhouse, madly looking for his watch.
"Anya, have you seen my watch anywhere? I can't find it" Anya helped in the futile search for the lost watch. It had been a good five minutes of searching before Anya heard Pooka give a whine, and she turned around to see him merrily chewing on Dmitry's watch, her Christmas gift to him. She promptly took the slobbery item from Pooka's mouth and held it out for Dmitry to see. White hot fury washed over him as Anya awkwardly held it for him to inspect. He sneezed before fixing himself and storming out the front door, not waiting for Anya to catch up to him. This dog was going to be the death of him.
He learnt that the week couldn't go by fast enough. In total the mutt had ruined his favourite pair of shoes, the consolation shoes that Anya had brought him, the watch she gave him for Christmas, his pyjamas, a book he was reading, and the couch. It was Sunday, the last day he had to spend with Pooka, and it was almost over, he prayed to every god possible that he could just make it through the night without any interference from the hell spawn of a dog that Anya loved. Anya was already tucked into bed, and Dmitry was about ready to nod off as well.
He was already in his new clean pyjamas, and he had made sure that the mutt had been taken out to do his business, and had been fed. His duties for the day were done. He snuggled up next to Anya peacefully, dreaming of a better place where Pooka didn't exist.
He was awoken abruptly by a warm body pressing between them, fur tickling his nose and a giant wet tongue licking his face. He sneezed violently before opening his eyes. Pooka had climbed up on the bed and wedged himself between Anya and Dmitry. Now he was really mad, the only solace Dmitry had had for the past week, was curling up and falling asleep with his wife, and now the mutt had ruined that too. Another sneeze was what finally caused him to snap.
With a defeated sigh he picked up his pillow and trudged off towards the guest bedroom. He was upset that he wouldn't wake up with Anya in his arms tomorrow morning, but at least he knew that he would be able to breathe tomorrow.
He didn't know what time it was, but he was awoken from his restless sleep when a slender frame slipped in bed and cuddled up against him. "I'm sorry" She whispered. He almost wanted to laugh, this whole situation had started with him climbing into bed and apologising, but how the roles have reversed. Dmitry rolled over and nuzzled gently into Anya's neck, making her giggle. She knew she was forgiven. "I didn't think he'd be that much trouble, he's always a perfect angel for me, and I didn't realise how hard taking care of a pet would actually be" Dmitry smiled and placed a gentle kiss against her neck.
Soon the kiss turned heated as he peppered them up and down her neck, she was sure the bruises littering her neck would leave her with no choice but to wear scarves for the rest of the week. Scratching and whining could be heard at the door of the guest bedroom as Dmitry flipped Anya so that she was straddling him, staring down at him in the pale moonlight.
"Just to be clear you've learnt your lesson?" Anya nodded as Pooka whined louder. "Also, please tell me you locked the door?" Anya nodded and was met with a kiss "Clever girl" Dmitry muttered against her lips, this time it was Anya who initiated the kiss, travelling along his exposed chest.
"This is to make up for all the things Pooka ruined" a low throaty chuckle boomed in Dmitry's chest, tickling Anya.
"Well you better make it good, he did ruin my favourite shoes!" Anya giggled, a mischevious glint in her eye as she melted her lips against his in a passionate embrace, as she made way to remove his pyjama pants. "And he ruined my watch" She worked quickly and almost every article of clothing was removed. A single howl fromPooka could be heard outside the door.
"Oh this is going to be worth your while"
Both of them learnt their lesson that night, Anya learnt to listen to her stubborn husband every now and then, because as stupid as he may be, sometimes he is right. And Dmitry learned that sometimes he might have to put up with a hellspawn of a dog, and he might have to sacrifice a few of his favourite items, and he might have to endure severe allergies, but if it gets him possibly one of the best nights of sex he's ever had. He will endure it. He'd be stupid not to.