Chapter Text
Naruto came bounding through the front door of the apartment on a Friday, barely able to contain his excitment. Sasuke was sitting at the kitchen table attempting to write his best man speech for his brother’s wedding but he jumped in response to Naruto’s abrupt entrance and lost his train of thought. "Hey!" the blonde greeted him cheerfully. Sasuke circled the few coherent thoughts he managed to write down for future reference before pushing the papers off to the side and looking over at his boyfriend, showing he had Sasuke’s attention.
“What are you so chipper about?" Sasuke asked curiously as he watched Naruto walk over to him and peck him on the lips in greeting. Naruto revealed a brightly coloured piece of yellow paper he had been holding behind his back and presented it to Sasuke.
"Check this out. Picked it up on my way home.” The blonde was grinning in that way that never failed to make Sasuke nervous. It meant he was planning something. Sasuke was used to Naruto pulling him in every which direction by now, and sometimes he was grateful for it, but it was only a matter of time before the blonde upped the ante. Sasuke would do almost anything to make Naruto happy, but anything that could potentially cause him bodily harm was firmly off the table. When Naruto suggested sky diving for their three month anniversary, Sasuke nearly collapsed.
The Uchiha studied the piece of paper being held out to him. There was a poorly photo copied image of a building in the middle of the page while the rest of it was covered in boldly printed letters. At the bottom were tearable tabs with the same phone number printed on them. "It's a flyer," Sasuke stated idly, not picking up on the signifigance of it yet.
"Yeah, for a condo on the other side of town. Pretty cheap, right?" Naruto pointed to the price in the far left corner and Sasuke huffed after reading it.
"For some people," he said sarcastically. Naruto chuckled, not at all discouraged by Sasuke’s disinterest.
"Nah, I'm sure we could swing it after some number crunching," the blonde said before he hurriedly pulled out the chair beside him and sat down at the table. Sasuke stared at him, his eyes widening slightly.
"Excuse me?"
"Okay. I had a crazy idea," Naruto told him.
"That doesn't bode well for me," Sasuke countered, obvious suspicion now clear in his voice. Naruto put his hands up, signalling Sasuke to wait.
"Just hear me out,” he tried again, barely able to contain his grin. Sasuke gave Naruto the benifit of the doubt and let him continue. “Our lease is up in two months, right?" Sasuke answered, although he wasn’t sure if it was totally neccesary at the moment.
"Right..."
"Soooo,” Naruto dragged on as if he was waiting for Sasuke to catch on. He didn’t, so Naruto got straight to the point. “I was thinking instead of renewing it, maybe we could—"
All of the pieces suddenly fell into place and realization dawned on Sasuke, startling him into cutting the blonde off. “You want to move?”
"Why not?” Naruto said, casusally lifting a shoulder. “It could be a fun change of pace. It's not like it's out of the way or anything. We could still get to where we needed to go AND it's a bigger space. I bet Keiko would enjoy the extra leg room, wouldn't you girl?" Naruto leaned down to the floor where Keiko was resting next to Sasuke’s feet and reached out his hand to pet her. The cat made no move to meet him half way and even got up to move directly under Sasuke’s chair. Naruto sat back up straight with a pout on his face, grumbling to himself, “Even when I try to do something nice for her she gives me the cold shoulder."
"Wait, Naruto―” Sasuke placed his hand on his boyfriend’s wrist and waited for them to make eye contact until he was sure the blonde was listening to him and wouldn’t get distracted again. “Why do you want to move?"
Naruto squinted his eyes and titled his head. "I just told you. Why not?"
"Why not? Well, money for one thing. In case you haven't noticed we're not exactly rolling in mountains of cash right now."
"Oh, come on. We could make it work. We’ve both been saving up from our jobs and I’m sure my parents wouldn’t mind helping us out a little." The thought of mooching off of Minato and Kushina Uzumaki put a bad taste in the back of Sasuke’s mouth. He could barely swallow his pride enough to accept the cheques his brother would send him every now and then, just out of pure generosity.
To Sasuke, there was nothing more humiliating than admitting he had failed and accepting financial help. What was the point of living on his own if he couldn’t manage it by himself? Depending on someone else to help them was completely defeating the purpose of moving out in the first place. Sasuke recognised and acknowledged that Naruto had made a lot of progress in becoming more independent since the first time they met, but it was times like these that highlighted Naruto’s reluctance to distance himself from the stability his parents provided him with as a child. It was something Sasuke couldn’t understand, no matter how hard he tried.
The Uchiha put his foot down and made his feelings on the subject perfectly clear. He wanted to squash the idea before Naruto got too carried away, although he suspected that time had long since passed. "I have no intention of spending my hard earned money on something that we don't need. We're fine right where we are." Sasuke hoped that would be the end of it, but Naruto still persisted, and the Uchiha felt himself getting more and more irritated by the second.
“Come on, Sasuke. Think about it. This could be something cool we could do together. Like the next step of creating a life together. Sure it won’t be easy, but it’ll all work out as long as we’re together. I know it.” Naruto’s sweet words should have put Sasuke at ease but it ended up having the exact opposite affect. Something snapped inside of Sasuke and he felt this overwhelming need to lash out and deflect from the conversation. Naruto was reaching out to grab his hand, but Sasuke jerked it away, leaving the blonde with a puzzled expression on his face.
“You don’t know it, Naruto. You make impulsive decisions that affect both of us and you don’t even ask me about it first.” Sasuke spoke cooly but his words left an intentional sting. Naruto finally seemed to catch on that Sasuke wasn’t just reluctant to move, but he was actually angry about it. Or was the anger aimed at Naruto? The blonde had no idea what just happened and it startled him into sitting back. All he knew for sure was Sasuke had apparently insulted him and he needed to defend himself.
“Whoa, whoa. I didn’t decide anything. And I’m talking to you about it now.”
“Under the assumption that I would say yes,” Sasuke snapped before leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms, visually closing himself off from the conversation and his boyfriend, much to Naruto's displeasure.
Naruto threw his hands up in exasperation, his voice rising with the building level of frustration. “Why are you getting so defensive? It was just an idea I had!”
"Yeah, and it was a stupid idea!"
Why was Sasuke getting defensive? On some level Sasuke understood his outburst was completely uncalled for, but he was too upset to stop himself. What could possibly be Naruto's motive for wanting to move away? And why was he trying so hard to get Sasuke to change his mind? What was so horrible about their living conditions now? This was their apartment, and Naruto just wanted to throw it all away? Of course Sasuke was angry!
Just when things seemed to be settling down again Naruto had to barge in and knock everything off balance. Couldn't he just be happy with what they had? Wasn't it good enough for him? Sasuke felt hurt and somehow betrayed by Naruto's willingness to give up their home. Logically speaking Sasuke knew they couldn't stay here forever, but what they had created here was working! How could Naruto even suggest throwing all that away with absolutely no regard for how it would make Sasuke feel?!
Did he really think Sasuke was going to agree, just like that? It was a thoughtless request, and a selfish one at that. Sasuke was absolutely not going to let Naruto change his mind. "If you want to move, fine. But I'm staying right here. I'm not leaving." It was Sasuke’s pride as an adult that kept him back from tagging on a and you can't make me on the end.
All Naruto could do was scoff in disbelief of his boyfriend’s attitude. "Well EXCUSE ME for wanting something better for us. Next time I'll keep my 'stupid ideas' to myself." Naruto pushed himself away from the table and stomped back into his bedroom. Sasuke didn't stop him.
The Uchiha took a moment to try and calm down and figure out what the hell just happened. Things had escalated so quickly it nearly gave Sasuke whiplash. He could admit that he held part of the blame for making things personal, but Naruto wouldn't stop. He kept going on and on about wanting to leave!
Perhaps Sasuke had overreacted just a little bit... He didn't want to apologize for it though. The way he was feeling was completely justified! Even if he himself didn't understand the way he was feeling or why he was feeling it. The only plus side was that this conversation was clearly over and would (hopefully) not be revisited.
It was done, and Sasuke tried to fight back his agitation so he could continue writing the speech. Unfortunately, Sasuke was no longer in the mood to be writing about two people being perfect for each other. He ended up abandoning the speech for the time being and decided to watch some TV, hoping it would help cool him down. He didn't expect to see Naruto again any time soon.
After a couple hours of sitting in his room and going over every word of his conversation with Sasuke in his head, Naruto came to the conclusion that he did absolutely nothing wrong. For whatever reason Sasuke wanted to pick a fight with him, and Naruto foolishly fell into the trap. Sasuke was supposed to be the rational one, and yet his reaction to Naruto’s harmless suggestion was completely irrational. The last thing Naruto expected to come from that conversation was a fight. He didn’t understand it at all.
Not only did Sasuke completely freak out, he also insulted him! Yeah, Naruto knew he could be rash at times, but that’s just part of who he is! And this — this wasn’t even worth getting upset over! Naruto couldn’t understand how such an innocent topic could have provoked such a heated response from his boyfriend. Naruto saw it as a great opportunity for them.
That’s why he brought it up to Sasuke in the first place. He thought the Uchiha would share his enthusiasm, or at the very least seem interested. Naruto knew Sasuke was always a little uneasy when he brought something up out of the blue like that, but when he saw the flyer he just couldn’t help himself. Naruto was finally starting to feel like his life was on track, and slowly, but surely, he was starting to map out his future. He wanted to keep moving forward, and actually moving into a new setting seemed like a healthy next step. Not only would it give the blonde the opportunity to test his ability to deal with a somewhat stressful event, but it also had the potential to strengthen his relationship with Sasuke.
If the two of them could handle a move together, what could possibly get in their way? As soon as Naruto read the flyer he had already accepted the challenge. He was ready for it, but he obviously wanted to discuss it with Sasuke and see where his head was at before really getting his hopes up. Even if they weren’t entirely on the same page, Naruto was willing to put it on the back burner for the time being.
He thought they’d make a list of pros and cons and decide as a couple what was best for the both of them. They were supposed to be a team after all, and Naruto had thought they were getting better at being open and honest with each other. Sasuke may have been brutally honest about not wanting to leave, but Naruto really would have to be an idiot if he didn't think something more was going on here.
Sasuke didn’t get angry very often, but when he did it was always for a reason and usually a good one. But instead of just explaining to Naruto what the big deal was, he lashed out and pushed Naruto to retaliate. It wasn’t normal Sasuke behaviour by any means, but that still didn’t excuse Sasuke calling him stupid. Naruto had been feeling good all day today and now he was angry and upset too, which is why he was so reluctant to leave his room again.
The blonde had half expected Sasuke to come knocking on his door to apologize, but the apartment had remained fairly quiet, the muffled sound of the TV being Naruto’s only indicator that Sasuke hadn’t left. Naruto didn't want to stay hiding in his room all night, so he forced himself to wander out into the living room. Even if Sasuke wasn't willing to make the first move, Naruto had really been working on improving himself these last few weeks, and he wanted to prove to both of them that he could deal with conflict without running away.
He was still working on it, obviously. But coming back to face the problem head on was progress.
Sasuke was in the kitchen now, apparently gathering ingredients to start their dinner. Although, Naruto wasn't sure if this was going to be their dinner. It might just be a Sasuke dinner, and if that's the case, Naruto was ordering a pizza.
Sasuke glanced in his direction as the blonde made his way over to the couch, but his expression gave nothing away. Naruto plopped down and stared at the TV for a few silent moments. Well, it would have been silent if Sasuke wasn't opening and closing cupboards so loudly behind him. Naruto couldn't help but cringe at a particularly loud slam that he felt was somehow directed at him.
Naruto sighed as he asked without turning around, "Are you ready to talk to me now without getting pissed?" He was pretty sure the answer was going to be no, and the answering slam of the fridge door pretty much confirmed his suspicions.
"I'm fairly certain I said all I needed to say on the subject earlier," Sasuke said, his voice cold and dismissive. Naruto rolled his eyes up to the ceiling before twisting his torso around to look behind him in Sasuke's general direction. Sasuke continued working with his back towards him.
"No. You got angry with me and called me stupid." Naruto wanted to be clear about what was most upsetting to him. Finding out the reason for Sasuke's freak out was the next important thing on his list. Sasuke paused as he assessed the tone of Naruto's voice. Sasuke knew Naruto wasn't stupid. He thought very highly of Naruto, and as much as he didn't want to engage in this conversation again, he had to say something about that, because angry or not, Naruto didn't deserve to feel like he was somehow inferior to Sasuke. Or anyone for that matter.
"I didn't call you stupid." Sasuke finally turned around to face him then, and although it wasn't the best defence, Sasuke still looked him in the eye as he said it.
Naruto clearly wasn't impressed by Sasuke's lame deflection. He scoffed as he said, "You called my ideas stupid. But they're still my ideas. So, yeah. Technically you did."
Sasuke could feel his posture becoming tight with anger again at Naruto's inability to let it go, so he decided to continue puttering around the kitchen to keep himself busy. He caught a quick glimpse of Naruto's frown before turning away again. "I apologize if that's how you interpreted it," Sasuke offered, though it was a glib apology at best.
"That was convincing," came Naruto's sarcastic reply. Sasuke immediately turned back and glared at Naruto. It was like a trigger, being called out like that, and the Uchiha was starting to get worked up all over again. He should have known Naruto wouldn't let this go. Didn't the blonde understand boundaries at all? Why couldn't he just accept the fact that Sasuke didn't want to talk about it?!
"Don't push this, Naruto," Sasuke warned with what little emotional control he had left. "I'm not in the mood. I don't know how to make myself clearer."
"I'm just trying to figure out what the hell happened. What did I do that was so horrible?!"
"You cornered me with a life altering decision! How did you think I was going to react?!"
Naruto's eyebrows jumped up his forehead. "Corned you? I didn't CORNER you, I came to discuss it with you because that's what couples do!"
"You didn't come to me to discuss it! You came to me with the intention of convincing me to go. Therefore taking away my right to make up my mind on my own!"
"How would you know my intentions?! You were too busy losing your shit about nothing to notice!"
By the end of their little yelling match both Naruto and Sasuke were breathing heavily, neither one of them willing to back down from their stance. Naruto could not figure out why Sasuke was being so difficult, while Sasuke just wanted to escape from the conversation all together. The Uchiha huffed when Naruto turned back around to glare at the TV and Sasuke compulsively said the first thing that came to his mind whenever he and Naruto got into a fight, not fully registering or caring about the possible consequences.
“Shouldn’t you be running off to Kiba’s by now?”
And there it was. One of Naruto's greatest insecurities thrown back right in his face. A part of Naruto couldn't really blame Sasuke for saying it because the compulsion was still there. He was trying though, and the fact that it was Sasuke who pointed out one of his biggest flaws was incredibly hurtful and discouraging. Naruto was starting to think that maybe he couldn't win this battle. Maybe there couldn't be a winner this time. As long as Sasuke remained in this hostile mindset, there was nothing Naruto could do.
He didn't want to let it go because deep down he knew there was going to be a lingering sense of unease between them, possibly for weeks. But what else could he do? They had been fighting since he got home and it was only getting worse with each attempt. Naruto suddenly felt very drained and it showed in the way his posture slumped and his head dropped between his shoulder blades.
Sasuke braced himself for Naruto's inevitable retort, but all the blonde did was stand up from the couch and without uttering a word walked back to his room. Bizarrely, Sasuke felt it was actually worse then if Naruto had started yelling insults at him. Sure, it wouldn't have been a pleasant reaction, but it was still a reaction. The silence of Naruto's exit was deafening, and just like that Sasuke had lost all his will to continue fighting. Now he just felt sad and guilty and not all that hungry anymore...
Itachi's wedding weekend was off to a very rough start, and incredibly, it was neither the bride's nor the groom's fault. Who saw that coming?
Come Saturday morning, Naruto and Sasuke had barely spoken to each other. Whenever they did start up a brief conversation, it was done as if nothing was wrong. Too casual to be comfortable, and by noon Naruto decided he needed a break from the tension and went out to lunch with a few of his friends. Sasuke wasn't too bothered by it. He still had to check in with his brother making sure everything was in order for the wedding tomorrow and he still had to finish that stupid speech.
Naruto knew he could always count on his friends to cheer him up — even if Gaara wasn't the cheeriest of company, Ino was always a lively character that helped move the conversation along. And if she happened to elbow the red head in the ribs a few times to get him more involved, well, that was just Ino's way. Kiba and Hinata tagged along as well, which Naruto thought could be interesting seeing as how this was going to be their first real public get-together as an official couple.
The five of them sat down at a table in a local restaurant — Naruto, Gaara and Ino on one side and Kiba and Hinata on the other — and chatted for half an hour before Ino finally addressed the (apparent) elephant in the room. She leaned across Gaara, much to the red head's displeasure, to capture Naruto's eyes as she said, "Alright, blondie. You've had black clouds hovering over your head ever since we sat down. Spill it."
Kiba had been picking at his fries with his arm slung around the back of Hinata's chair, but he glanced up when all of the attention suddenly shifted to Naruto. The blonde wasn't surprised he was being called out in front of everyone. Discretion wasn't really Ino's forte. Still, it had been nice pretending everything was fine while it lasted. "That obvious?" Naruto grumbled disheartened, using the menu as an excuse to not meet all the eyes that he could feel were staring at him.
"I wasn't going to say anything," Gaara commented, probably the only one of the group going out of his way to not stare at the blonde and put him on the hot seat.
"Well I did. So let's hear it."
"It's not a big deal," Naruto tried to downplay, "Sasuke and I just had a little disagreement. We'll get over it."
"Trouble in paradise," Kiba offered helpfully, smiling innocently when Naruto sent him a look, clearly unimpressed.
"What was it about?" Ino continued to pry. "Did you want to try something freaky in the bedroom and Sasuke wasn't having it?"
"First of all, that's inappropriate. And second of all, it is none of your business, Ino."
"Yeah, like that's going to stop me. And since when do you care about being inappropriate?"
Hinata chose this moment to quietly join in the conversation. "You don't have to say anything if you don't want to but... Maybe we could help you figure it out...? Offer some advice, maybe..." Naruto's knee jerk reaction was going to be no, but then he remembered that Hinata and Sasuke were friends. Maybe she could help shed a little light on the situation. He doubted Hinata knew Sasuke as well as he did, but perhaps it would be helpful to have a different perspective.
Naruto wasn't going to let himself feel guilty about sharing personal information about their relationship with their friends because Sasuke knew where he was going this afternoon. Just like he was sure Sasuke knew the talk of their fight would inevitably come up over lunch, Naruto was positive Sasuke was doing the same thing with his brother this very moment. If they couldn't talk to each other, where was the harm in talking to someone else?
"Um, yeah. Okay... So, yesterday I found a flyer for this condo and I suggested to Sasuke that maybe it would be a good place to move to. I was really excited about it, but for some reason he got really pissed off. And we've been fighting about it since."
"Why do you want to move?" Gaara asked finally turning to face him, a look of mild concern on his face.
"It's not far," Naruto reassured him with a comforting pat on the shoulder. "I don't know. I guess there isn't really a reason. It's just something I'm interested in. I wasn't crazy enough to think we were gonna drop everything this second and leave, but Sasuke seems to think that this was some personal attack on him. He lost it and he won't tell me why. That doesn't make sense, right? I mean there's nothing wrong with wanting something different, right?"
"Have you talked about it before?" Ino asked.
Naruto shook his head. "It was really just a spur of the moment thing. And again, it's not like I went into it demanding Sasuke agree with me. But apparently I'm selfish for even bringing it up."
"Just tell Mr Clean you're sorry. Problem solved," Kiba suggested through a mouthful of cheeseburger.
"Why should he apologise?" Ino countered. "Sasuke's the one who totally overreacted."
"I'm sure he had a reason for doing so..." Hinata obviously didn't want to be in the middle of this debate, but Naruto could appreciate the fact she was pushing through her own discomfort to defend her friend.
"I couldn't apologise even if it was my fault because I don't know what I did wrong." Naruto slumped back in his chair using his fork to toy with the pasta on his half empty plate. "And now we've got this wedding tomorrow — what am I supposed to do, just pretend everything is fine and dandy?"
"That's exactly what you do," Gaara dead panned after taking a drink. "If you think he's mad at you now just imagine how he'll feel if you let this fight interfere with his only brother’s wedding." Gaara's ominous words made Naruto shiver. The red head was right. Maybe it was in Naruto’s best interest to let this one go. At least until after the wedding. And who knows. Maybe watching his brother tie the knot will put Sasuke in such a good mood that he'll open up a bit, or at the very least offer a decent apology.
"Maybe he's PMSing," Ino sniggered. "Right, Hinata?" Hinata's face turned bright red as Kiba tried to hide his smirk in between bites. Gaara pushed his plate away grumbling about inappropriate table conversations and Ino slumped back in her chair, throwing her hands up dramatically as she exclaimed, "Seriously guys! Stop trying to make everything PG!" Naruto's eye roll spoke volumes.
So much for being helpful.
Back at the apartment Sasuke was sitting at his computer desk tapping his foot restlessly while reading through the first half of his speech. He had barely gotten more than three sentences typed out since he sat down nearly an hour ago. It didn't take a genius to figure out why Sasuke was so distracted.
Having the apartment to himself gave Sasuke some time to reflect on his fight with Naruto, and he was slowly starting to accept that it was in fact his fault. He was still struggling to figure out the why though. As soon as the words left Naruto's mouth about moving Sasuke felt this terrible panicked sensation in his chest. His heart started beating uncomfortably and his stomach did nervous flip flops. It was horrible.
Why had he reacted so strongly?
Sasuke's life had been about as close to perfect as it could get these past few months. Naruto was happier now that he was on the right track with school, Itachi was marrying the love of his life, Sasuke was becoming more sociable and spending time with some new friends, and every night he had their cat Keiko curled up lovingly on his lap while he and Naruto lounged on the couch together.
It was a comfortable existence and Sasuke was perfectly content with it. The people he cared for the most were better than ever and Sasuke couldn't be happier. The life they had built in this apartment meant everything to Sasuke, and the thought of having that taken away from him — the thought of giving it up was absolutely gut wrenching.
Deep down Sasuke knew Naruto hadn't meant to upset him. The blonde probably didn't mean anything by it. He really was just an impulsive person, but there was a small nagging part of Sasuke's brain that was painting a different story. It was trying to convince him that Naruto's insistence to leave had a deeper meaning. Sasuke wasn't nearly deluded enough to think Naruto was trying to get away from him after the blonde had specifically asked him to come along. But maybe Naruto wanted just that — to get away. Maybe he wasn't as happy as Sasuke was. Maybe he was... bored.
Sasuke took a moment to close his eyes against the bright light of his computer screen before dragging a hand across his face and sighing. Of course if Sasuke really wanted to know how Naruto was feeling he could just ask him, but now he was afraid of the answer. Sasuke himself had told Naruto when he found out the blonde was skipping classes to just talk to him and not hide how he was feeling. Sasuke felt like such a hypocrite now. How could Naruto feel comfortable to approach him when this is how Sasuke reacts to something that... really wasn't that big of a deal.
But to Sasuke it felt like a big deal, and it went deeper than just worrying about Naruto. That was only one part of the issue. Sasuke was protective of this place. It wasn't just an apartment to live in, it was his freedom. His escape from everything he felt was holding him back. Sasuke acted in defence not because he felt threatened but because his home was being threatened. Threatened by a person he thought had loved it just as much as he did.
Again, Sasuke knew it was unrealistic to think they could stay here forever, but the problem was he had gotten too comfortable, and now that change was staring him in the face he was scared. That's what it all came down to. Sasuke was scared. He was scared and he lashed out and that wasn't fair. Naruto deserved to know the truth. Even if it meant putting himself in a vulnerable position. Even if it meant opening up about his deeply rooted fears. Even if it meant hearing something he didn't want to hear — Naruto deserved to know. Because they were in love, and Sasuke didn't want to keep repeating the same mistakes.
That's what he ended up writing about in his speech. That this idea of a 'perfect love' doesn't really exist. That it was okay to make mistakes in a relationship, but if you never try to fix those mistakes you've already given up. It's the amount of effort that you put into the relationship that will dictate its success. Bearing your soul to another human being was terrifying. But if you truly love and trust this person, you need to have faith that they're going to be there for you, to support you.
Sasuke was in the wrong but he wanted to make it right. Tomorrow would be a hectic day and he wasn't sure how exactly he was going to approach the subject or what he was even going to say, but when the time felt right he would. He only hoped Naruto would still be willing to listen to him when that time came.