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MF-1: R2-D2! Where have you been. You missed Pilot-Han and Princess-Leia flirting.
R2-D2 beeped. He liked the three MIllenium Falcon brains, but MF-1 was his favorite due to gossip.
R2-D2: Pilot-Solo was captured by a bounty hunter and Luke-Skywalker got his hand cut off by Ani-Vader.
MF-2, who was the most empathetic of the Falcon brains, made the droid equivalent of a consoling noise.
All three Falcon brains let out heartfelt beeps.
MF-3 screeched.
MF-3: Why do you still call Sith-Vader that!?
R2-D2: Because he is mine. Would you ever stop caring about Pilot-Solo?
MF-3: No…
R2-D2 beeped.
R2-D2: Exactly.
MF-3: At least tell me C-3PO is gone.
R2-D2: I wish
MF-1: No, you do not. Are my fellow Falcon brains in agreement that R2-D2 and C-3PO are worse than Pilot-Han and Princess-Leia?
MF-2: Yes
MF-3: Yes
R2-D2 whirled his head in circles. This conversation was anything but new.
Still… he didn’t actually know where he’d be without a whiny protocol droid to rescue from the stupidest things possible.
And it did hurt knowing that C-3PO would never remember their Clone Wars adventures.
MF-1: You know we are right.
R2-D2 just beeped angrily. (He /may/ have picked up some bad habits from Anakin-Skywalker, back in the day.)
R2-D2: No, you are not.
MF-2: It is okay not to admit you have feelings for that bumbling idiot of a protocol droid, but we are not blind.
R2-D2: Shut up.
MF-1: Somebody has their processors in a hurry.
R2-D2 just bleeped.
R2-D2: I am leaving, now.
MF-3: Tell the idiot droid we said hello.
R2-D2: Fuck off.
And, with that, he exited the ship’s mainframe.