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“Come on Rey I know you’re happy about getting to see Merry old England, why the long face?” Asked Rose Tico.
“I don’t know, I mean, I’ve got the feeling that I must be the sappiest Jane Austen fan in the world, and Rose? I hate you… I mean, how dare you fall in love and get married within these last six months. Six months, mind you, in which I was feeding my piggy bank to make this journey with you - and now, look at me and my envious pity party? I feel, oh God! I feel like, I must look like the last pathetic romantic on the face of the Earth.”
“Not true honey. There is a long line of crazies that have conventions, wear disguises and pretend to be obsessed about the time when the potty bowl was hidden under the bed and women had to wear rags instead of tampons on their period… Ouch!”
Rey had thrown a pillow at Rose’s retort and was laughing.
“You are the worst, Rose Tico!”
“Tut tut tut, no I’m not, and it’s Rose Storm, thank you very much.”
“Well yeah, I know, but now, oh God, I’m not sure I want to make this trip without you?”
“Stop complaining Rey Jakku, you are the resilient one, the one that doesn’t give up and thrives in adversity… this is your dream, seize the moment and have a great time.”
“Thousands of crazies, huh? Okay, Mrs. Storm, you were the one who found the tour, plus the Jane Austen historical retreat. So I’m a fan, but so are you and don’t even try to deny it.”
Rose arched her eyebrows and in a sing-song voice commented in return.
“Look, I was able to trade my stay for an upgrade so instead of being the sad Harriet Smith, you get to be moved to the higher status of Elizabeth Bennet.”
Rey narrowed her eyes at her friend and adds: “You don’t say?”
“I do, now enough with the dramatics Jakku and get your stuff together, and don’t forget to get me a present, and don’t worry about Beebee, I will take care of the mangy cat.”
-oo0oo-
“Tell me again, why am I doing this?” Asked Ben Solo to his Uncle and mother.
“Oh, darling you know why, it’s called ‘community service’ and you get to be a gentleman instead of a crazy demolition expert… or the what did the World News call you? oh yes, “wrecking ball” Replied his mother Leia while his uncle just sniggered.
“You are never going to forget about that isolated incident, now are you?”
His father Han joined the conversation and added: “Come on Ben, it’s not that bad, you get to ride horses, act all angsty like Heathcliff and Mr. Darcy and that’s it.”
“So long as I don’t have to interact with anyone, and I get to concentrate on building my own ship? that’s fine by me.”
“Ah, but you must attend dinner and the ball, other than that you are on your own.” Remarked Luke.
“Brilliant,” Ben replied with a growl.
“Hey Kid, cheer up, who knows maybe, you will be pleasantly surprised with the overall experience?” Said Han.
“And maybe, instead I rather endure appendicitis?” Questioned Ben.
“Enough Ben, just be ready, the guests arrive this Monday,” snapped Leia.
“Fine, I’ll be there.” Ben agreed and then walked out.
-oo0oo-
Rey Jakku’s personal journal.
To start, I don't think I would ever resort to writing in a diary, but the need is great, so here it goes...
Dear Diary I think I’ve made a mistake. The very first day after landing I got lead along with a couple of crazy, I mean, 'real Austen fanatics' to an airport shuttle from there we were taken into this nice bed and breakfast.
At the bed and breakfast, I got in character, while I changed my outfit and got fitted in long underwear, corsets and one empire dress in a shade of mud brown, a bonnet, plus boots.
I could not take my phone out even to snap some pictures of my new image and I when I got to the manor, I was allocated in a creepy tower, where I’m sure a ghost still roams, it must be the last guest that slept there, that? or the Weasley’s ghoul.
I looked like Laura Ingalls crazy and sad long-lost aunt, but it didn’t stop there, oh no, it got worse.
I can fix bikes, cars, pay my bills and pack a mean right hook. But here I couldn’t do those things instead there is needlework, crochet, painting, singing, playing an instrument and gossiping.
One morning I asked if it was possible to enjoy the sun and ride a horse, well dear diary, guess what? side saddles were not available for Elizabeth Bennet.
I decided to forego the norm and went for a walk and enjoy the lovely summer. Well, it rained. I was no longer just miserable, yes dear diary I got wet too.
It dawned on me that women back in Jane Austen’s time died of pneumonia often, I mean they lacked antibiotics, therefore, a certain death. At this point, I too feel like committing suicide by pneumonia, and I cannot reach Mrs. Storm and accuse her of being a huge TRAITOR for granting my Pride and Prejudice retreat, I know now it was a conspiracy to kill me, yes, it was A TRAP!
-oo0oo-
Ben Solo was puzzled.
For once, he found himself staring intently at his guest Rey Jakku more that he would like to admit.
She was having a pitiable time. She was a lovely young woman that from the start had little to no interaction with the rest of the 'lunatics' guests and personal. Ms. Jakku tried getting to breakfast and got lost on her journey to the serving table. She too wanted to go riding a horse and was denied.
Another time she tried reading a book and got a slap on the wrist by his mother Leia because those were first edition books.
Then in one of those times when she went astray, she found his workshop.
Rey smiled like a child at a candy store when she got near his sketches and in particular the design of the engine.
Ben found Rey on his working table and was close to having a heart attack when he stopped and saw the small alterations to his design, and then she started singing “Stairway to Heaven” he felt like he found the last living Dodo bird.
“What have you done?,” Ben asked.
“Oh, sorry I didn’t see you back there, I've just added some notes, not on your sheets but a couple of sticky notes on the side.” Rey answered and then said, “I have to go, I’ll be seeing you, have a great evening Mr. Solo.”
Ben decided to study the elusive woman. She had a difficult time socializing. She had a lovely voice, but she only sang classic rock, and it was just for herself or when no one was watching, she had a brain and was utterly miserable in the so call “Austen Experience.”
The following night Ben found Rey star gazing at the window and he quietly spoke.
“You really don’t like it here, do you?”
She turned around and smiled, once she recognized the man that made the inquiry.
“I love Jane Austen, but this? this is too depressing… I mean, now I understand why Austen decided to flee convention by writing something, somewhat complicated, angsty and romantic, anything to avoid conversation and for that, hear another vapid remark of who is going to be a spinster and who is the town’s whore.” Answered Rey.
“It seems you have experience being alone?,” asked Ben.
“Maybe, I have to go now, dinner is being served.”
“Are you going to the ball?”
“I’m might as well go, after all, it’s the last big thing before I leave this place.”
“Wait, you’re leaving after only three days?”
“Yes, I could only afford the “weekend experience” and well, and if I stay longer I will literally go insane, I get the feeling that the Amish have more fun than this? but, then again, it was just for three days, next year I’ll spend seven thousand Euros in Cabo instead.”
“Seven thousand?,” inquired Ben.
“Yes, um, I have to go, are you coming to dinner?”
“ I uh, have to, I have an urgent meeting to attend to, excuse me Ms. Jakku.”
-oo0oo-
Rey Jakku’s Journal.
Well, it’s official I hate England. Uh, maybe I’m being overly dramatic, but seriously? now I understand why my ancestors decided to flee the English shores and work as slaves for seven years, before being released from their contracts and purchase land on a different side of the world.
Anything else, than to sit at a dinner table and watch just how isolated and neurotic people could turn, for example, me. So, other than that, I decided to be brave just one last time, I would make the appearance at the last dinner and ball, and pray for the minutes to go faster, before leaving this place.
Last Day at the “Austen Living Hell Experience.”
I wore the dress, the jewelry made the expected headcount at the dinner table. After I got my fill of the delicacies at the feast, I got up and excused myself, with the classic “I have a headache” apology.
I went to the garden to stargaze. The moon was full and I noticed that the weather was amenable and sat on the bench. Waiting for the lights in the house to go out.
“Miss Jakku? Oh, thank God I found you!”
“Mr. Solo, good evening, is there something wrong?”
He blinked and was sweating.
I asked again.
“Have you been jogging?”
His face cracked a smile and for one fleeting moment, I thought I saw a very smart and sweet boy underneath the façade of a grown grouchy man.
He then replied.
“I was worried that you might have run away.”
“I thought about leaving, yes, but, I don’t have a hotel booked so, I might as well, bite the bullet and stay until this whole ‘thing’ comes to an end.”
“You have been unbelievably patient during your stay and the distasteful performance by my family and for that, I must apologize.”
“What, those people are your family?”
“Not all of them, no, but the middle-aged couple and my uncle Luke are the ones that I’m referring to.”
“Do you have an idea why they were so particularly mean to me?”
Ben Solo sighed and answered
“Sadly, I do know the reasons for why they were a band of snobbish, pretentious morons to you… bare with me a moment, will you?”
I blinked and slowly nodded waiting to understand if it was the isolation, senile dementia or plain rudeness that moved those three other elders to behave like coiffed gorillas.
Mr. Solo got on his knees and stared straight into my eyes.
I began to blush, I mean guys who look dashing with long black hair, sporting a clean shave, a brilliant smile, and make the eighteenth-century clothes look easy to wear? are particularly scarce in my daily routine.
I um, well, those males, I mean, for crying out loud! the man made feel nervous, but not bad nervous… I know I’m babbling, but good nervous, THERE! I’ve admitted it, at that particular moment in time I thought that man/hunk looked quite edible, phew!
I bit my lip and he arched an eyebrow, cleared his throat.
“What I’m going to say sounds too ridiculous, even to me, but it’s their reasoning, please don’t be angry at my parents and my uncle, just give me a moment to gather my thoughts, um… some time ago, while my mother was expecting me, she got a free reading from a famous fortune teller... right, um the fortune teller, foretold of my terrible fate to be unwed and unwanted until I matured enough and made an effort to get my story straight, that I would be able to have a loving mate, however, it would be my family, meaning my mother, father, and uncle who would find the match to balance out my darkness… she would be and I quote; “A ray of light” I did not believe in fortune tellings at all, so once I grew up, I moved out and made a name for myself believing that the great Fortune Teller Maz Kanata, was a crazy midget that was high on chocolate brownies… I tried finding this so-called “ray of light” But, the fortune teller added that the “ray of light” would be like the ‘Princess and the Pea’ she would arrive at my ancestral home and prove her worth, she would take all the misery in her life and turn it into gold… or something, so in retrospect, my parents behaved so abhorrently towards you, to make sure you were the right one, the whole ‘Austen Experience’ was the mattress and my parents the Pea.”
“You have one crazy family, you are aware of that, right?”
“I - I am aware, yes!”
“And they went through all this circus to test my worth?... wait a minute, is this part of the “Austen Experience too? I mean I got charged a hefty amount to get to have a declaration of love by Mr. Darcy?”
“What! No, as a matter of fact, I have your refund here, no, no I’m not just saying this to round up your experience here… I really like you, you are unique, you know about engines and you are quite accepting of other people’s quirks, and that counts, to me you are the only person I’ve would like to be near.”
“I’m no one of importance.”
“Silly girl, did you not hear me? I said you are very important to me.”
“Really?”
“Yes, um, Rey?”
“Yes, Ben?”
“You mind if I kiss you?”
“I don’t mind, no.”
“Good.”
I felt his hand sneak up my waist and pulled into his arms and his lips and mine greeted in one beautiful kiss I got to taste his sweet tongue, my hands ran up his lovely mop of hair and then I heard a voice in the dark.
“No need to panic I found Ben and he’s got the girl… good for you son, now remember the first born child should be named Han, no matter if it’s a girl or a boy, okay?”
“Han, why are you cock blocking our son, if he wants to name then children like he said in his teens like the power rangers, who are we to judge?”
“Don’t worry Ben keep kissing Ms. Jakku and I’ll babysit your parents, now sister and brother in law, stop scaring their baby making moves on my naughty nephew...”
I goofed off and he groaned.
“Are they always this loud and loving?”
“Yeah, now, where were we?”
“Oh, um, kiss?”
“I thought you’ve never asked.”
The End.