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Frank Castle didn’t initially know what day it was, until he turned on the TV. While trying to keep a low profile and his nose to the ground, days sort of flew by. For him, it was better not to dwell on the day. Monday, Tuesday, November 5th, June, 6th, it was all the same. Just another date, another hour living after the gunfire.
Father’s Day. He supposed Lieberman was celebrating it with his family; his kids must have been happy to spend it again with their dad, after a year of believing he was dead. Frank didn’t know if he could do what David did. Put his family through what he did. The Punisher always believed what Micro had done was selfish, to let his wife and kids suffer like that, but maybe it was himself who was selfish. All he thought about was how he couldn’t be away from his family if they were still alive, but that would have put them at danger. David was a good man.
As Frank sat in a lawn chair stop the roof of his building, he sighed thinking back on everything. This year’s Father’s Day was not as bad as the first one after his family’s deaths. It still hurt on the inside, though. There were plenty holidays he was away on tour, but he did always get a card, even when his kids were too little write it and it was obvious Maria was the one signing their names.
“I thought I’d find you up here.”
A familiar voice touched his ears, hearing heels clicking gently towards him. Craning his head over his shoulder, he gave her a lopsided grin, “I’m that predictable now, huh?”
Karen smiled, while walking over with a coffee in her hand. Handing him one, she took a sip of her own and looked out at the city they called home, “Well, it’s a gorgeous day out, who wouldn’t be here enjoying the view?”
“Yea...it’s nice out; you should go to the beach or something. Enjoy it out there.”
With a small laugh, Karen shook her head and grabbed the extra lawn chair to pull it next to Frank’s and sit down. Sometimes, they’d meet together and talk about work. Her stories, his line of duty. There were other times the two of them would just look out from the rooftop and not say anything at all. It was a strange time right now and she understood that.
Mindlessly biting his thumbnail, Frank sighed, “You know….I think back on everything...and sometimes I don’t think I was a very good father.”
“Frank, don’t say that,” Karen immediately defended, “You know you were a good dad.”
“Was I though? I was always on tour...I was hard on my son. I didn’t need to be that hard on him,” Shaking his head, Frank sighed, “I always was just in the moment. I always thought, there’d be time to make up for when I was being an asshole. When I was too tired to read my daughter her favorite book. Who thinks...that there isn’t gonna be enough time left? Did...did my kids...did my kids die knowing that I loved them more than anything?”
Clearly, this Father’s Day was not any easier than the last one. Not wanting to overwhelm Karen, he turned his head to the side before letting the tears that had welled up in his eyes trail down his cheeks. The hardest part about them being gone wasn’t just the way they died or the fact that they had at all, it was wondering if he had done enough. Had he done enough as a husband, as a father? Did he make his short time with them worthwhile? Had he let any of them down?
Frowning, Karen reached over to gently touch Frank’s arm, knowing how difficult everything was for him. With a light squeeze, she reassured, “You were the best father to them. Don’t you think differently. There are so many people out there who would have loved for a man like you to be their dad.”
For some reason, Karen’s words always did bring him comfort, even he didn’t entirely believe her. Nodding, Frank looked back and swallowed back his tears, “Good coffee.”
“Yea...new place near my apartment opened up.”
Frank nodded, reaching out and taking a hold of Karen’s hand, asking, “Will you stay?”
“You know I will, Frank.”