Work Text:
*FUMBLING NOISE*
*CLICK*
*WHIRRING NOISE*
“Dannnnnn… for fuck’s sake!”
“Phil. It’s like a bloody oven in here. We have the air con, we’re using the air con. This isn’t some sort of mind… brain… I mean…”
“Just as well really. Clearly you’re not thinking-”
“I already said. It’s HOT. And I can’t sleep.”
“And I was asleep. Until you turned on the world’s loudest fans and woke me up.”
“Phil, you could sleep on a fucking clothesline. I refuse to believe you cannot sleep with the aircon switched on. See, feel how much cooler it is in here already…”
“Then turn it off and we can both sleep”
“Huh. S’not that cool yet”
“You’re not that cool”
“Ha. Phil, you managed to sleep just fine when we lived on top of that bloody A-road for five years, you managed to fall asleep on a damn bus practically every night for two months two years ago, you sleep on planes, trains, backstage at fucking VidCon for heaven’s sake, but you can’t-“
“No. I can’t. Those other times I didn’t have a choice-“
“You don’t have a choice here. You think you do, but-”
“It’s not that hot. It’s only London for heaven’s sake, not some… desert… place.”
“Pfft. Now who isn’t thinking?!”
“Dan, I swear on Mum’s life…”
“Just go to sleep.”
“I. Can’t. It’s too noisy”
“Well shut up and go to sleep then.”
“Daaaaaannnnnnnn…”
“Oh, for fucks sake…”
*CLICK*
*SLAMMING NOISE*
“Thanks Dan. Night m’love.”
**Minutes later**
“Hey, Phil... Phiiiillll?”
“Oh, for… What?”
“SomeBODY ONCE TOLD ME THE WORLD IS GONNA ROLL M-mfph!”
“Shut. Up. It’s the middle of the night!”
“Mmn-duh-ape-uv-en-ell…”
“Dan..! OW! You absolute little…! That HURT!”
“If I can’t sleep, you ain’t sleeping either Philly. Fair’s fair.”
*EXASPERATED SIGH*
*CLICK*
“What you looking for in the drawer?”
“Earplugs. Good. Night.”
*CLICK*
“’Night Phil.”
“Hmpf.”
“Yeah, love you too.”
*CLICK*
*WHIRRING NOISE*