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Chapter Text

[Tiff]

Dream Land (Anime)
Cappy Town

It was another bright and sunny summer day here in Cappy Town. Luckily for me (and Kirby), Dedede wasn’t up to any of his usual nonsense, so I decided to take a walk around the village, with Kirby in tow. Look, living in Castle Dedede isn’t bad—I mean, it’s comfortable enough, there’s plenty of space for us to work with, and our esteemed king doesn’t bother us too much… but in the end, this is Dedede we’re talking about.

You know: he’s only the guy who keeps trying to get rid of Kirby and sends all these demon beasts our way (though we call them monsters, for simplicity’s sake). It hasn’t been that long since Kirby came to Cappy Town – it’s been about three months since March – and I’ve basically settled into this routine of ‘Dedede summons a demon beast, it attacks us, Kirby stops it’. I really don’t know what beef he has with everyone, Kirby especially, but I’m glad we’re able to get away from it at times—even if it doesn’t last that long.

A girl can only deal with so much before she gets tired of it all.

I looked at Kirby, his blue eyes sparkling brightly, looking happy to simply be outside and feeling the sun’s rays wash over him. There was a “Poyo!” flying out of his mouth with every step he took, his head bobbing up and down not unlike a Waddle Dee’s way of moving. I smiled. He’s a baby, sure, and he’s not exactly the smartest or the most sensible person – but he’s our baby. I can’t imagine life without him anymore, and him being here is enough to make any day better.

Of course, it wasn’t just me and him around. “Man, it’s an awesome day today!” my brother Tuff exclaimed, practically bouncing off the walls to go play. Like any annoying little sibling, he didn’t hesitate to tag along when he heard we were heading out. I hope he doesn’t have anything irrational planned in his head – I still vividly remember my heart metaphorically jumping out of my chest when he got trapped inside Booma-Dooma Volcano. “I can’t wait to hang out with everyone today! And Dedede won’t be around to mess things up this time!” Well, that’s one thing we can both agree on. “Aren’t you excited, Kirby!?”

“Poyo!” Kirby hopped upward as he replied jovially, hands eagerly sticking up in the air. Good to see he’s enthusiastic – even if I think that’s kind of the only thing he can understand. “Poyo, poyo!”

“You’re ready to have some fun today, aren’t you Kirby?” I remarked. He poyoed in acknowledgement. “Just make sure not to go eating anything weird this time. We don’t want a repeat of the Noddy incident from last week.”

“Oh come on, Tiff!” Tuff pouted at me. (He should know those don’t work on me anymore.) “That was one time; it’s not gonna happen again! Kirby knows better!” He looked a little uncertain now. “…at least, I hope Kirby does…”

Kirby didn’t seem to be paying attention to our conversation. I’m… not exactly sure how I should feel about that. “…so long as we keep him away from anything he definitely shouldn’t be eating, I think we’ll be good,” I decided.

…hmm? I tapped Tuff’s shoulder and pointed my finger forward. “Tuff, look—something’s going on up ahead,” I told him. There’s a crowd gathered around the big tree in the square. That’s undeniably something abnormal! Even Kirby stopped for a bit and tilted his head in curiosity. (“Poyo?”)

“Hey, you’re right! Let’s go check it out!” The three of us ran on forward as fast as we could, bumping through the assorted group of Cappies—“Oops!” “Sorry!” “Excuse me!”—until we finally made our way to the front to see just what was going on.

And what we saw, well…

…this was not what I expected to see when I woke up today.

Put simply: there was a strange rainbow vortex floating in the middle of Cappy Town.

I could hear murmurs ranging from “What could this be?” to “I hope it doesn’t mean business!” to “Please don’t let this be King Dedede’s doing again…” The vortex itself didn’t seem to be doing anything except spin around in place, changing colors every second. The core of it was this dark blue and black color scheme, and it greatly complimented the rainbow mix swirling on the edges. It didn’t look dangerous, but then again, there were plenty of monsters Dedede sent that didn’t look intimidating at first glance, either.

And here I thought things couldn’t get any more bizarre around here, even by our standards.

“Wow,” Tuff gaped at the portal (not that I could blame him), “what is that? Tiff, do you know anything about it?”

“I don’t know…” I replied. “I—I haven’t seen anything like it before.” None of the books I read mentioned anything about mysterious portals showing up out of nowhere, either. I turned to everyone and asked, “Does anybody here know what it is?”

Beside me, Kirby jumped onto Tuff’s head to get a better look, one hand on his face and placed right where his chin would’ve been, if he had one. “Poyo poyo?”

(…I hope he doesn’t try to eat it.)

The Mayor responded to Tuff with, “I don’t know! I just woke up and there it was, sitting in the middle of the square! It’s got us all frightened about what it could be.”

I narrowed my eyes and carefully analyzed the vortex. Just because it’s not dangerous now doesn’t mean it won’t be dangerous later. That was the case with Octagon, before. “Based on the information available to us… I think it may be some sort of portal,” I carefully said. I know that was obvious, but I have to say it! Everyone here can be kind of dimwitted, sometimes. “But to where, I don’t know. Has it done anything since it showed up?”

“No, it’s just been sitting there. None of us have tried touching it yet, either.” Well, that made sense, at least. You wouldn’t want to touch something you don’t know what it does—wait a minute, Kirby!

Suddenly, I noticed Kirby trying to get up close and personal with the vortex—and my instincts immediately kicked into overdrive. “No, Kirby!” As fast as I could, I ran up and grabbed him into my hands, safely yanking him away from… whatever it is we’re dealing with. “Don’t touch it,” I scolded him, “we don’t know what it does!”

“Poyo?” True to form, Kirby didn’t seem to understand what I was saying. He pointed his hand at the vortex in confusion. “Poyo poyo?”

“I know you want to see what it is, but it’s too dangerous right now. What if you get hurt in the process? I’m don’t want to lose you today.” I felt my face go rather solemn, and Kirby, despite how innocent he was, got the memo. He touched my cheek with one of his hands, putting a reassuring expression on his face. “Poyo! Poyo!” It was like he was saying, ‘Don’t worry, I won’t go anywhere!’

I smiled. He always knows how to cheer someone up. That’s… what I like most about him.

Next to Tuff, I heard Iro predict, “Maybe it’s another one of King Dedede’s monsters! He sends them out practically every day.”

“That can’t be right,” Tuff replied. “We would’ve heard something; Dedede’s never that quiet, especially when it comes to ordering monsters.”

It’s sad when that’s a viable excuse for there not being a monster, I mused. Had everybody really grown used to things like that over the past several months? It seems so strange, thinking about a time before all these monsters started showing up. Or a time before Kirby, to be honest.

Where would we be without Kirby?

…probably trampled beneath Octagon, I guess.

Just then, all of us heard the sound of a tank revving toward our positions. There was only one person in Dream Land that had anything like that. “Speak of the devil,” my brother groaned, putting a hand to his forehead. I felt myself wanting to do the same. “It’s Dedede!”

Of course he’d come. He’d never pass up an opportunity to harass us over whatever demon beast he’s ordered this week (if this is the doing of a demon beast, that is). Listening to him ramble has gotten pretty stale, and I really could be doing so much more with my time. Too bad he’s also the only television channel, too.

Well, television rots everyone’s brains, so it’s not like I’m missing a whole lot.

“I should’ve known he had something to do with this!” Mabel exclaimed.

“What does he want now? Hasn’t he caused enough pain?”

“If I have to listen to him ramble about clobbering Kirby one more time…”

Reluctantly, the crowd of Cappies spread out a little in order to let the massive tank through. Dedede’s trademark laugh echoed through the air (“HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!”) as his massive vehicle halted a few feet away from the vortex. “Good mornin’, Cappy Town!” he greeted, his arms raised in the air. “Yer great King Dedede is here!”

I still have no idea how he became king of Dream Land. He’s certainly anything but great. And he’s not fooling anyone with his current demeanor, for a chorus of groans and boos immediately echoed back at him.

A vein appeared on the self-proclaimed king’s forehead. “HEY!” Dedede shouted, looking insulted at the ‘cordial’ response. “I haven’t done anythin’ wrong! Why are you all jeering at me!? I’m your King! Show some respect for yer elders!” I don’t know how he expects us to give him respect when he barely gives us any, but that’s Dedede for you.

“What, you mean you haven’t caused this vortex to appear?” I asked, with my eyebrow raised and my arms crossed. “This type of event seems right up your alley.”

“Vortex? Whaddya talkin’ about?” Finally, Dedede turned his notice to the vortex in the middle of the square, and he immediately jumped in the air in surprise. “W-W-WHAAAAAAAA!? WHAT’S DAT DOING THERE!?”

Oh, great. His reaction basically tells me this definitely can’t be his doing. Well, I suppose that’s a good thing, but that also leaves me back at square one trying to come up with explanations for this.

“Wait, you mean not even Dedede knows what it is?” Tuff said. “That’s crazy!”

Escargoon hopped off the vehicle, interjecting with his signature snooty tone, “Contrary to popular belief, we’re not responsible for everything that goes on in this town. We’re just as surprised as this as you are.”

I wouldn’t believe him if he wasn’t working for Dedede.

“Hey, Escargoon!” Dedede looked at his loyal minion, not bothering to even whisper. “I didn’t order any demon beasts in my sleep, did I?”

“I’m pretty sure I would’ve heard something if that happened, sire.”

Now I can’t the image out of my head. Dedede just going up to his throne and somehow spawning a monster out of nowhere? Despite myself, I found myself giggling at the thought. What are the odds that something like that would happen?

Meanwhile, everyone’s theories had been thrown out the window, just like mine. “But if this isn’t King Dedede’s doing,” Chief Bookem said, “then whose fault is it? This can’t be legal in the slightest.”

Breaking through the sound of the newly re-energized crowd was Meta Knight’s voice. “Yes, this is quite the mystery.” Looking up, I could see him standing on one of the rooftops, acting all mysterious as usual, what with his cape wrapped around him. He always manages to show up whenever we need it the most – or whenever Kirby’s doing a thing with his Copy Abilities. Just… how does he keep doing stuff like that?

The knight jumped down, landing in the middle of the crowd. “It does not appear to be hostile,” he continued, “but I would advise against performing any action with it. It is best to simply wait and see.” Sadly, that advice… doesn’t really help us any.

And as much as I would rather not say it, Dedede seemed to agree. “Dat’s boring!” he dismissed. In an instant, his trusty hammer was in his hands. Which does make me wonder, since he’s got it now: if he’s so insistent on trying to ‘clobber Kirby’, then why doesn’t he just use his hammer instead? Does he not exercise, or…? “Let’s just smash it to pieces! That’ll show it who’s boss! HEH HEH HEH!”

“No, sire, we shouldn’t!” Escargoon protested. “What if it’s Nightmare Enterprises come to collect its debt? They might racket their prices even higher, and then how will we order any more demon beasts?”

“Pfft!” Dedede looked nonchalant about the situation. “Dat won’t happen – not if I knock ‘em out first!” (I thought he was trying to stay on their good side!?)

Suddenly, before Dedede could do anything, the vortex began to pulsate and vibrate, making some rather distorted noises as it did so. “Whoa, what’s going on!?” Tuff exclaimed, putting some distance between him and the suddenly-active portal.

“I don’t know!” I replied, reeling back, hoping against all the odds that this wasn’t anything bad. Please, please, please…!

“Poyo poyo!?” Kirby was similarly panicking in my arms. I clutched him a little tighter.

“Eep! Escargoon, protect your king!” Unsurprisingly, our esteemed king tried to cower behind his lackey, who was very much protesting in response.

“What!? Are you crazy, sire!? I don’t have anything that can fight against whatever comes out! You have a hammer, for crying out loud!”

“I don’t wanna use it! You do something instead!”

“Quiet, Your Majesty!” Meta Knight interrupted the bickering duo. “The vortex could do anything, and we must be prepared for any eventuality.”

Everyone went silent, waiting for the vortex to stop moving. It kept warbling and warping with all these weird noises for an uncomfortably long while. Everyone else watched nervously, waiting for it to finish whatever the heck it was doing.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity… a circular figure burst out of the portal, unceremoniously landing face-first onto the ground. “Sure,” they were muttering, their voice sounding sassy and more than a little childish, “just punt me into the Warp Hole first. Fantastic, Dedede. You owe me two cakes for this.” Dedede? What does he have to do with this? I thought we established that he was innocent in all of this?

Looking down, I felt my eyes widen as I took in the features of this newcomer. He was pink, he had short, stubby arms, he had red feet, he was very much shaped like a ball…

“No way…!” Tuff breathed.

“P-Poyo!?” Kirby freaked.

“It can’t be…!” I gawked.

Kirby was supposed to be the only one of his kind, the one and only legendary Star Warrior we’d ever see.

And yet, here we are, with another freaking Kirby right in front of us, looking the exact same as the one I was holding in my hands.

…well, he was a little bigger than our Kirby, but still!

Appropriately, every one of the Cappies began to murmur in not-so-quiet tones.

“Is that Kirby? But… isn’t he right there in Tiff’s hands?”

“There’s two of them? Oh, I need to stock up on my food supplies…”

“I hope this doesn’t mean we get double the monsters!”

I stared a little longer at our newest visitor, completely flummoxed by his entry, and finally I just groaned in exasperation. “This is going to be one of those days, isn’t it…?”

Approximately a few minutes earlier…

[Kirby]

Dream Land (Canon)
Castle Dedede – Entrance

It was another bright and sunny summer day here in Dream Land. It was about as tranquil as you can imagine, nice and peaceful and with butterflies fluttering about in the wind—luckily, all of them being of the ‘not Morpho Knight’ category. It was a day like any other, just like the morning Dark Matter invaded our planet so many years ago… and the time Drawcia turned everything into a Picasso nightmare… and the time both my house and Dedede’s place got strung up into the sky by the Dreamstalk… okay, this metaphor isn’t exactly working out.

But I’m confident that nothing weirdly crazy will happen today; Hyness and his Jambandra Cult have already been taken down, the Star Allies aren’t going through any friendship hang-ups or anything like that, and the Harmony Crew has gotten acclimated to life here on our little World of Miracles (following a lot of pain, heartache, heartbreak, and a trip to an academy that’s kind of a wreck now). What more could you ask for?

I, for one, was perfectly prepared to go about today in my usual way: wake up, stretch my limbs, go fishing, chow on a few apples, maybe do a bit of flying… all the stuff you’d expect from a guy like me!

…and then my stomach practically growled, ‘No, you can’t go do that! I’m hungry; you must go eat!’ Which is, uh… my normal state of affairs, to be honest, but it’s still kind of suboptimal.

And since I’m the type of guy who’ll listen to my gut—or the black hole we call my belly; either phrase works here—I decided to head over to Dedede’s place. I mean, he always has a good selection of foodstuff available—especially cakes!—and that type of nourishment was exactly the thing I needed right now.

Besides, I’ll get to see Kaede and the crew again. How could you say no to that?

I hummed the good ‘ol Green Greens melody as I plodded along, walking the well-worn trail to Castle Dedede. Now, I know, I could just use my Warp Star and fly on over there – but where’s the fun in that? Dream Land’s a beautiful place; it’s not wrong to want to take a look around and bask in its beauty!

Before too long, I had reached the entrance to my best friend’s abode – and I waltzed into his courtyard. “Hey, Dedede!” I called, a hand cupped around my mouth, my typical sass flitting into my tone. “You got any food for me today? I’m feeling kind of peckish, so I’m willing to take whatever’s left in your kitchen!”

As expected, Dedede was standing outside – probably waiting for me, I guess – seeming to stare at something in particular, a quizzical expression on his features. Alongside him were my other two good friends, Meta Knight and Bandana Dee; not surprising, when it’s not just the two of us, it’s usually the four of us. He turned toward me when he heard my call, and he looked utterly relieved at my presence. “Kirby!” he greeted me, waving a hand in my direction. “Good thing you’re finally here.” He pointed a thumb at whatever he had been looking at. “Come check this out; I think you’ll be interested!”

“Y-Yeah, yeah!” Bandana Dee flailed his arms around, eyes closing shut in panic (as was the norm for him), Meta Knight grunting as we spoke. “I—I don’t know what’s going on, b-but—m-maybe you can help f-figure things out!”  

I blinked. “O…kay?” I replied. “What about this thing’s got you guys in such a tizzy…?” A part of me wondered if he’d discovered a 121st Energy Sphere by complete accident – I’m pretty sure Magolor doesn’t need any more of ‘em, but it’d be cool to give him as a present – but what was actually there stumped me more.

Hanging outside of Castle Dedede, right in the middle of the courtyard… was a Warp Hole, much like the ones in Floralia.

“…what,” I bluntly stated, my mind trying (and failing) to come up with a rational explanation.

“I concur,” Meta Knight felt the need to say. “‘What’ was my own reaction to this event. I had felt a disturbance while I was tending to the Halberd—” By tending, I hope he doesn’t mean ‘send it on a another trip into the Secret Sea’, I internally snarked—“and I immediately flew over here to investigate. Dedede and Bandana Dee don’t know anything more than I do, I’m afraid.”

“So long as it’s not Hyness or any of his mages trying to take another crack at us, I think we don’t have too much to worry about,” Dedede shrugged. Casual as ever, I see. “I am curious on how much this’ll affect us, though.”

“It—It was already here when we woke up this morning,” Dee piped up. “Neither Great King or I heard a-anything about it last night—and when we asked all the other Waddle Dees, they said they hadn’t heard anything either.”

I hummed in dissatisfaction. “Hmm…” We’re going into this blind. How perfect. “Have Kaede and her crew heard about this?” I asked. “This thing’s practically in plain sight, after all.” She and Shuichi are normally up around this time – they’re remarkably good at waking each other up – so they can’t have missed this. Not to mention, Warp Holes make a pretty distinctive warble. “Now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure I would’ve gotten a wake-up call from one of them over this…”

“Th-They’re… having a c-camping trip over in Nature Notch,” Dee answered me. “They’re n-not gonna be back until the weekend.”

…I feel like I should be surprised, but somehow, I’m really not. Strange coincidences happen all the time here; what are the odds they’d inevitably be out of the way while this is going on?

“Well… at least they don’t have to worry over this?” I tentatively said, my voice a little questioning. They have been through enough shenanigans—both from their homeworld and from us. “That does leave the question of ‘what the heck are we supposed to do with this,’ though…”

“Indeed,” Meta Knight agreed. “This is a mysterious occurrence, even by the standards which us native Dream Landers have grown accustomed to. We must keep ourselves on guard; we have no idea what this Warp Hole can do, or where it will even send us.”

“Heh heh heh!” Dedede laughed. “You know, you two fret about these type of things too much!” He put his hands on his hips and beamed brightly. “Nothing’s happened with this Warp Hole in the hour we’ve been watching it. Another hour could pass by and the exact same thing would happen. So let’s relax and have a little fun!”

My best friend’s gait was infectious, and it didn’t take me long to gain a positive demeanor of my own. “You heard the D-man! We’ve got all the time in the world we need to experiment with this thing. Whoever’s on the other side will probably be welcoming to that end, so long as we toss in a supply of apples or two as a gift!”

“Orrrrrr—” Dedede’s voice continued, following where I left off, holding his hammer high in his hand for some reason, “we could throw Kirby in there and have him test it out for us!”

“Yeah! …hang on, wha?”

Without warning, Dedede swung his glorified golf club and smacked me straight into the Warp Hole. I yelped in surprise as I arced straight toward the thing in record speed. That’s just not right! You have got to be kidding me! I internally complained.

“Don’t worry, you’ve handled worse!” he nonchalantly ‘reassured’ me, a cheeky grin on his face. “You’ll be fine!”

“Oh, you butttttttt—!” I screamed. My whole surroundings terraformed around me as I was sent into what I could only presume to be the void of space—or wherever the heck Another Dimension is; I can’t tell the difference—and let me tell you, spinning around at the speed of sound is disorienting! (How does Sonic even do this all the time!?) I was in there for a good long while, aimlessly flying as I was carted by the winds toward my destination, just going and going and I swear I’m going to get Dedede back for this somehow and then—

Location: (How do you expect me to know? I just got here!)

—I was unceremoniously dropped face-first onto a hard stone pathway, one foot sticking up in the air and my mind reeling from the uncomfortable trip I just took. “Sure,” I grumbled into the ground, “just punt me into the Warp Hole first. Fantastic, Dedede. You owe me two cakes for this.”

I heard some sort of crowd humming with curiosity and confusion around me—

“Is that Kirby? But… isn’t he right there in Tiff’s hands?”

“There’s two of them? Oh, I need to stock up on my food supplies…”

“I hope this doesn’t mean we get double the monsters!”

—but I had far more pressing matters to think about first. Like, where the heck did this Warp Hole send me? The crowd here implies I’m at least in a village, but I don’t remember any sort of village in Dream Land that would sound as active as this one, let alone have stone walkways.

I mean, not even the roads during the Robobot invasion were like this. Resolution Road and Rhythm Route are most definitely different locales. There’s the island where the Arena guys hold City Trials and Air Ride races, but those don’t really count; they aren’t as populated as other areas on Planet Pop Star. So what exactly does that mean…?

Only one way to find out!

Getting to my feet, I shook off my nausea and took a look at the villagers before me. Oddly enough, there were a bunch of decorated Cappies, each one of them lacking their signature mushroom hat I’d come to associate with them. A bunch of them were dressed in a ton of different outfits: there was a fortune teller, a barman, a police officer, an archeologist… the list goes on and on. They weren’t the only ones there—but they were enough to get me thinking.

“…okay, this day is getting even weirder than before,” I muttered. What else is different in this bizarro world? Just then, my eyes were drawn to another important figure: a yellow girl with blond hair tied into a ponytail, and a more tan boy with remarkable dandelion-green hair covering his face. I’ve never seen their species before, and believe me, I’ve seen a lot—but the real standout was the figure the girl holding.

And much to my surprise… it was me. Well, me circa several centuries ago, when I was pretty much a glorified baby—but still, me.

That prompted me to take a glance at all the other colorful guys hanging about the area: a Meta Knight wrapped up in his cape as if it were a burrito, some purple snail that looked rather snooty, I think Chef Kawasaki was somewhere in this mass of people—and lastly, there was a King Dedede who was much more plump, looked far more aggressive… and completely lacked the kimono from my own friend.

…what? It was very obvious!

“Sire,” I heard the snail whisper to the fatter Dedede, “are you seeing what I’m seeing?”

The other king answered in this weird Southern accent, “Dat portal can spawn Kirbies! I knew it was a bad thing!”

“Gee, how rude,” I drawled, my face becoming deadpan at this Dedede’s… interesting response. I barely know what’s going on, but that’s not gonna stop me from being my usual self! “And here I thought I’d get a much warmer welcome. Eh,” I did my best impression of a shrug, “guess we can’t have everything!”

“H-Hey…” the technicolor-haired boy tentatively spoke up. “Are… Are you really Kirby?”

“Well, yeah,” I said. “Who else would I be, Meta Knight? Marx? I don’t see anybody else who’s quite this pink!” I imitated putting my hands on my nonexistent hips in faux-smugness. “They don’t call me the ‘Super Tuff Pink Puff’ for nothing, buddy!”

“Poyo!?” my counterpart exclaimed in response, after a long silence (out of what I can only presume to be shock). Yep, he’s undeniably as I was when I was born on Twinkle Star; he’s still in the phase where he can only speak Poyoese. I grew out of that so long ago, it’s honestly weird to see him speaking like that.

“But—But how is that possible!?” the yellow girl exclaimed. “Kirby’s supposed to be the only one of his kind around! ”

“Pfft—get used to the impossible ‘round Planet Pop Star, girlie!” I smirked. “There’s a reason we’re the World of Miracles! Though—” I hedged a look back at the Warp Hole, which was fluctuating in place. “—something tells me this miracle’s ‘bout to get a little bigger.”

“Cannonballlllll!” echoed that familiar regal, booming voice, and I instinctively knew to step out of the way. Landing with a decently-loud thud—and a hammer still in his hand--was a guy everyone in Dream Land had long grown accustomed to. Relaxed, carrying himself strongly, and more than a little penguin-y; it was my best friend, King Dedede. “Look alive, everybody – the pinnacle of perfection has arrived!” He grinned toothily. Yep—that’s definitely Dedede.

“Glad to see you could finally join,” I raised an eyebrow, “especially after you punted me straight here. Couldn’t you have done it any more gentler?”

“Oh, c’mon,” Dedede laughed, “you’re clearly fine and all, so it’s not like there was any real harm done! ‘Sides—I know you could take care of anything that could’ve been tossed your way! No hard feelings, right?”

His grin was so dumb—edging on the type of ones I tend to have—that I couldn’t help but shake my head and smile a warm smile myself. “No hard feelings,” I agreed. “You are really lucky you’re my best friend, y’know.”

“Hey, you’re the one who kept on pushin’; I’m just the gift that’ll keep on givin’!”

“Friend!?” the other Dedede shouted with shock. “With dat there Kirby!? Not a chance! I’d rather eat Kawasaki’s food!” (In the crowd of villagers, I heard someone shout a “Hey!” And also a “Wow! Those two… actually friends with each other? That’s so… strange!”) “And just who are you, anyway!?” he demanded, pointing a finger at my friend. “I’ll have you know, there’s only enough room fer one King Dedede in Dream Land!”

“Gee, this is one really weird place,” my Dedede said, scratching the back of his head, “So, you’re my counterpart here?” He went up to his doppelganger and looked at him closely. “Do you ever get any exercise? I swear I could not look any plumper if I tried.”

A vein promptly appeared on Other Dedede’s head. “PLUMP!?” he roared in rage, raising his arms to the sky. “How dare you insult the great king of Dream Land like that! You’re just askin’ fer trouble, now!”

“Eh, don’t worry your feathers over it. I’m already perfect, so I guess I’ll just have to pick up the slack from you. Shouldn’t be too hard!”

“YOU LITTLE—!”

“Great King!” Bandana Dee warped in from the portal, still adorning his trusty spear and recognizable blue headscarf (otherwise known as a bandana, as you can no doubt tell). He was cutely flailing about his king, still so very concerned for his safety. That’s the friendly worrywart I know. “D-Don’t just jump into a Warp Hole like that! What if you got possessed again!? You know you have a problem with that type of thing!”

(“A Waddle Dee that talks?” I overheard the Cappies buzz. “And what’s with the bandana?”)

“Heh, I’m sure I wouldn’t be taken off guard by that again,” Dedede dismissed. “Besides, if that happened, you and Kirby can just knock it out of me! And then I can give ‘em a good slamming! It’s a win-win for everybody!”

“I wouldn’t quite say ‘win-win’,” I amended, “but that’s usually how things end up playing out.”

“N-N-Not you too, K-Kirby!”

“See, Dee? Kirby agrees with me!”

“You shouldn’t be so casual about such an occurrence,” Meta Knight’s baritone filled our ears. With a flap of his wings, he descended right to our side, the Warp Hole summarily closing behind him. His gauntlets and violet metal boots were polished to perfection, as always, and his figure seemed to intimidate the Cappies hanging around. “After all, you should know better than anyone that danger is always around every corner.”

“Aw, lighten up, Meta!” Dedede slapped the knight on the back. To his credit, he didn’t flinch at all from the impact – more can I can say from Dee half the time. “Like I said earlier—we took down Hyness and his band of cultists already, all the Ultimates back home are alive and kickin’, there aren’t any newly revived villains to contend with, and the True Arena won’t be hosted for at least another two years. There shouldn’t be anything too stressful for a while! I mean, we haven’t been attacked or anything yet! I consider that a plus!”

(“Whoa,” I overheard the yellow-green haired boy breathe. “Look, Tiff, that Dedede actually seems pretty cool!”

“Please never put ‘Dedede’ and ‘cool’ in the same sentence again,” the ponytail girl replied quietly. If she was referring to my Dedede, I’d take insult, but the other Dedede seemed kind of like a jerk, so I could see where she was coming from.)

Meta Knight grunted. “That may be true, but it’s not like the galaxy hasn’t pulled any curveballs on us before. It is best to err on the side of caution, I believe.” I could sense him raising an eyebrow behind his mask, once he caught wind of his caped counterpart. “…though I will admit,” he said, seeming to engage in a little staring contest with his double, “I am intrigued by this turn of events.”

In the strangest accent I ever heard (was he Mexican???), his counterpart replied, “We are in agreement there.”

Meta Knight’s eyebrow could not have been raised further, unable to be seen or not.

“That’s the spirit,” I sang. “Sometimes, it’s best to just go along with the flow! I’ve learned that much, anyway~”

“Y-Yeah! Wh-What Kirby said!” Dee chimed in. “A-Again, I’m not entirely sure wh-what’s going on—but I guess th-that means we’ll have to do our best to find out!”

“Alright, alright,” the ponytail girl raised her voice, getting us to pay attention to her. “I—I think we’re all kind of confused right now, so we should get on the same track. I’m Tiff, that’s Tuff over there—” She nodded her head toward the yellow-green-haired guy, who had a wide and toothy grin on her face. “—and this is Kirby. O-Our Kirby.” Said Kirby joyously beamed at the sound of his name being called, waving his hands up and down. “So, uhh… who exactly are you all?”

Huh, I thought our similar appearances to this dimension’s Kirby, Meta Knight, and King Dedede made things clear. But I suppose there’s no harm in an official introduction. It’s only right to be polite, after all! And what are the chances I’ll get to do partake in something like this again?

We briefly looked at each other and smiled, before I turned to face the crowd.

“So, hiiiiiiiii~!” I gave my trademark greeting, raising my hands to the air and standing on my tippy-toes. “I’m Kirby, and this is Meta Knight—” Said knight merely gave off a “Hmph,” in response. Typical.

“—King Dedede—” Our self-proclaimed king waved his hand in the air with a grin on his face. “Good to meet you all!” he told the crowd.

“—and Bandana Dee,” I finished, seeing my fellow companion jumping up and down in a sort of excited manner.

“And together, we make up the core members of the Star Allies!” I gave out my happiest smile. “I hope we can be pretty good friends, everybody!”

I’m gonna be the first to say this: this situation is kind of new, even by our standards.

We’ve seen a lot of stuff before—heck, this year’s been the craziest year I’ve ever had in my thousand-plus years of existence. Between Dedede’s first Cake Royale, the Jambandra Cult’s bid to summon Void Termina, the ensuing True Arena bout, plus Kaede and her group of fifteen other Ultimates… it’s almost as if there’s a competition to see how much more insane can get the year 2018 can be for us, what with how every adventure seems to escalate further than the last.

(Not to mention, Master Hand hinted last November of there being a new Smash Bros. tournament on the way…)

At this point, adding in another Pop Star and a clone of me (except way, way younger) is just the tip of the iceberg. You could toss in Dark Nebula or something and I wouldn’t bat an eye anymore.

And judging by the fact that the Warp Hole closed after the four of us made our way here…  I can only presume that this is going to be quite the extended affair.

That’s fine by me.

I’ve always been one to enjoy a good adventure – heck, that’s what I was doing for a literal millennium before I finally settled down on Pop Star; makes me wonder what my counterpart was doing before the same thing happened to him – and if I get the chance to make new friends along the way? I’ll take it all in with open arms!

In a way, that’s a miracle in and of itself!

So long as I’ve got my best friends by my side, then I’m totally prepared for this next step in our lives. And in time, when we’ve got the rest of our allies here – be them old adventurers or modern Ultimate – I know it’ll only get better from there.

So bring it on, duplicate Pop Star! We’re more than ready for you!

The Star Allies are gonna rock your world—you’ll see!

Chapter Text

[Tiff]

Cappy Town – Hill

I’ll be honest – this is pretty insane.

What else can I say? I mean, we’re dealing with duplicates of people I know. Kirby, Meta Knight, King Dedede – there’s double of them now, and that’s so strange to think about.

They act so different, too! Kirby can speak and he’s sassy! Meta Knight’s even more serious than our own. And King Dedede? He actually seems like a good person. I thought that was impossible, but yet…

It’s hard to argue with the sight before me, though.

“…and then Kirby fell asleep right in front of us. Can you believe it? The three of us – even Meta Knight – spent over half an hour trying to wake him up.” The other Dedede was telling stories of the Star Allies’ misadventures, as they called themselves. He had a big, heartfelt smile on his face, looking right in his element next to my brother and the other kids.

“Wow! Really?” Tuff seemed amazed.

“Yep! He can sleep pretty soundly when he wants to. Luckily, he got back up the minute he smelled some strawberry shortcake.”

“Shortcake?” Honey noticed. “Not watermelons?”

“Nope!” the Waddle Dee – Bandana Dee, the other Kirby called him – replied. “While he doesn’t mind melons, he’s always loved eating cake the most. Great King has always made sure to keep a supply of cakes in his fridge, especially after the Squeak Squad incident.” Squeak Squad incident? Hmm, I should ask the other Kirby about that sometime.

“Poyo poyo…” the Kirby I knew drooled next to Tuff. Oh no – I know that face. That means he’s getting hungry. I should make sure he stays away from any lunch table today; we still have to eat, after all!

“Man, not even food would wake up our Kirby like that,” Tuff said. “Me and Tiff had to go find this Pukey Flower in order to wake him up after he ate a Noddy. That took us forever to get!”

“Why would he need a flower?” Bandana Dee asked. “Wouldn’t he just wake up after a few seconds or so? That’s what our Kirby does when he’s not actively trying to sleep.”

“…actually, he would’ve been sleeping for a hundred years.”

“A hundred years!?” Dedede jumped. “Gee, that’s a long time! I know Kirby’s old, but sheesh, that sounds practically nightmarish! Glad our Noddies don’t do anything like that!” He gave a hearty laugh, one that sounded so much more light-hearted than anything our Dedede would say. “Well, I think I’ve gone on long enough about our own tales. What about you guys? Surely, you’ve got interesting things to say with your Kirby.”

All of them seemed pretty excited, sharing stories about each other’s dimensions. Me, I was still pretty weirded out – I mean, it’s still Dedede. The guy who’s always trying to kick Kirby out with a variety of monsters. And here he (technically) was, just hanging out with everyone as if it’s no big deal, talking about Kirby as if he was his best friend (and judging by the stories, that very much was the truth).

“You seem pretty conflicted by all of this,” I heard the other Kirby’s voice. I turned around, and there he was, walking up beside me. Despite everything that had just happened, he looked as if it was just a regular day. “There’s nothing wrong about that, though. I mean, If I wasn’t so used to things like this, I think I’d have the same reaction too.”

“You mean this isn’t the first time you’ve traveled dimensions?” I asked, astonished.

“Nope! I’ve done it loads of times before, especially for the Smash Bros. tournaments. I’ve never missed a single one of those! Enough about that though. What’s on your mind?”

“It’s just…” For a moment, I struggled to put my thoughts into words. “You all act so different from what I’m used to. I mean, our Dedede has yet to get along with our Kirby, and he’s also generally kind of a jerk to all of us.”

“Hey, don’t feel too bad about that!” the older Kirby soothed. “I’ve been where you are before. My Dedede used to act kind of like that, too. The first time we really met, he was actually trying to steal all the food in Dream Land.”

“Steal… all the food… in Dream Land?” Okay, now I was just flabbergasted. “T-That’s something not even our Dedede would do!” Besides, how would you the food supplies of an entire region? Why would you even want to? That’s so greedy, it loops back around into being ridiculous.

“Yeah, even the people of my dimension thought that it was crazy. I had to go beat his butt until he started making sense again. And then I had to beat his butt several more times after that.”

“So, you guys used to be enemies?”

“Of a sort. He puts up a pretty good fight with that hammer of his, actually. After a while, that transformed into being frenemies, and then we were just friends. I wouldn’t have it any other way, if I’m being honest. The two of us have been through so much. I’d trust him with my life; Meta Knight and Bandana Dee, too. The three of them… they’re my best friends.”

He looked so fond of the three he was talking about. It made me wonder. If this Kirby and his Dedede could become friends, even if they started as enemies… then could my Kirby and Dedede be the same way, someday?

…yeah, I don’t think so. Dedede’s just too much of a jerk for that to happen.

“Say, now that I think about it…” Kirby looked wondering. “I’ve seen your Kirby, but I don’t really know what your Meta Knight and King Dedede are like, beyond the weird accents they have.”

That’s right – this Kirby’s Meta Knight and King Dedede speak a little differently. Meta Knight’s got this dark and broody voice, while Dedede is more light-hearted and booming. They sound and act so different, it throws me off. But that’s not what Kirby wants to know.

“Oh, where do I begin?” I groaned. “Dedede really doesn’t like our Kirby for some reason, and he’s always sending demon beasts at him. One time, he got a giant rock monolith of himself to try and squish him.”

“Giant rock monolith?” the other Kirby asked. “Why would he need something like that? Wouldn’t a giant robot have sufficed?” Giant robot? Just what type of things have the Star Allies been through that they expect giant robots first?

“He was trying to prove his legitimacy as the ruler of Dream Land, since no one really respected him. He wanted to ‘prove’ that the Dedede Clan were the founders of Cappy Town when it was actually the Cappy Clan that did that.”

“Heh, that’s something I couldn’t see my Dedede doing,” Kirby chuckled. “He may be a king that’s self-proclaimed, but everyone in Dream Land still loves him anyway, so he’s never needed to prove himself. So, how does Meta Knight fit into this equation?”

“Meta Knight’s a… pretty complicated guy,” I began. “From what he’s told us, he was one of many Star Warriors that fought against this force of evil called Nightmare Enterprises. Most of them were defeated, so he came here, waiting for a Star Warrior to show up – that’s Kirby – who could defeat Nightmare Enterprises for good.”

“Hold up.” The other Kirby suddenly looked far more alarmed than I expected. “Nightmare Enterprises? Is… Is that really what he called them? The company?”

“Yeah, he’s never been wrong before,” I stated, confused. Did he have a history with Nightmare Enterprises too? “Why do you ask?”

There was something unreadable on his face. “…no reason,” he said carefully. I didn’t buy that, not for a second. “Just… Remind me and Dedede to talk to your Meta Knight sometime. I think it’ll be important.”

Briefly, I caught what looked like determination – I recognized it as the one my own Kirby wore against all the demon beasts – before going back to his jolly demeanor. It seemed so strange and so quick, I almost thought I had imagined it. “…are you okay?” I asked.

“Yeah. I’m fine,” Kirby was quick to reassure me. Maybe a little too quick. “What does your Meta Knight do here, anyway?”

It was a clear attempt to change the subject, but I decided to oblige him. I can get answers later. “He kind of acts as my Kirby’s mentor," I said. "He knows practically everything about him, actually. He can explain every single Copy Ability in detail whenever it comes up.”

Kirby snarked, “Yeah, that definitely sounds like Meta Knight. The mysterious warrior with knowledge beyond anyone’s understanding.” Gee, he certainly had a penchant for being sarcastic. Again, it totally throws me off because I’ve come to expect being childish out of Kirby’s mouth. “I wonder if he picked up all that information from one of my journals, or something.”

“You had journals?” I blinked in surprise.

“Well, yeah. Unlike your Kirby, I had to figure out what each of my Copy Abilities did myself. I had quite a lot to experiment with, so I always recorded the information I got on several journals I would keep on my starship. I lost them a long time ago, but by then, I had everything about my abilities figured out.”

“Too bad you don’t have those journals now,” I lamented. “We still haven’t seen all of my Kirby’s Copy Abilities yet, and it would’ve been nice to see all of them.”

“Don’t worry, I’m sure you won’t need ‘em,” Kirby dismissed. “Your Kirby’s still learning, and there’s no guarantee he’ll be the same as me. With you and Meta Knight around, I’m certain he’ll someday grow into his full potential.”

“You really think so? …Thanks.” As much as my Kirby can be frustrating to deal with at times, I really do care for him. I couldn’t imagine life in Dream Land without him, now. To hear something like that from someone so similar to Kirby… It really warms my heart.

Yeah, I have a heart – as much as Tuff would tell you otherwise.

Mine’s certainly bigger than our Dedede’s, anyway.

“No problem. Now, how about we join the guys over there?” Kirby suggested, a hand vaguely pointed in the direction of Tuff and my Kirby, with the other Dedede and Bandana Dee enraptured in the stories Tuff was regaling to him. “I wouldn’t mind interacting with ‘Lil Kirbs myself.”

I blinked again. “’Lil Kirbs?”

“Well, yeah. How else am I supposed to differentiate us? Besides… He’s so tiny and adorable that I think he deserves it.”

“Already have a soft spot for him?” I teased. “Hope you’re not trying to steal my position, now. That’s already taken!”

“Oh, don’t worry – you’ve got the motherly figure down well. I’m fine just being the cool older brother.”

“Motherly!? Hey, you take that back!” Grinning, Kirby started dashing away as I chased after him, my rage tapping up several notches. “I’m nowhere near like that!”

“Your protesting is only proving my point!”

“Grrrrr…! You get back here!”

[Meta Knight (Canon)]

Meta Knight’s House

“So, this is your current house of residence?” I asked aloud, analyzing my alternate’s abode with interest. It was a rather quaint place, with enough room for three. “And here I thought, with you being Dedede’s servant, you’d be living inside his castle.” Admittedly, I could not see myself being a long-term servant of King Dedede, though I have worked for him a few times in the past. My counterpart truly knows how to perform long-term infiltration missions, especially with how hostile this world’s King Dedede is.

“While it would certainly be convenient, I believe there is merit to being separate from His Majesty,” he explained, his Mexican accent being admittedly very soothing to my (non-existent) ears. “It allows me the ability to be active in places where I otherwise would not be able to. This way, I can keep an eye on Kirby, and help him grow as a Star Warrior.”

“I must admit… It is strange to see your Kirby be so much like an infant child. When my Kirby arrived on Dream Land, he already had the ability to talk and think intelligently.”

“Ah, I had figured you would ask that question. You see, Kirby was not supposed to arrive on Pop Star yet. He was supposed to arrive two hundred years from now.”

“T-Two hundred years!?” I exclaimed, briefly losing my stoic composure. “I know us puffballs live longer than most other species, but that is quite a long time to wait.”

“It is nothing I could not handle. After all the hardships I have faced in my time with the Galaxy Soldier Army, this was very much something I needed to do. If I were not here, Kirby would have much more of a difficult time. He needs the guidance of a true Star Warrior, so that he may be able to face off against Nightmare.”

“Nightmare, Nightmare…” I muttered to myself. “That name sounds… vaguely familiar to me.” I let my thoughts wander a bit. Was this ‘Nightmare’ a foe Kirby once vanquished? There are very few incidents in Dream Land that I do not have some recollection of. Unfortunately, this seems to be one of said few. Perhaps Kirby or King Dedede remember facing off against this supposed being.

“His name stretches out far across the galaxy,” my counterpart continued. “I would not be surprised if he somehow managed to stretch his influence across entire dimensions. In fact, their Transporter Machine shows traces of that type of technology already.”

“Hmph… If he does make it to our dimension, then I am certain us Star Allies will be able to easily dispatch of him,” I stated confidently, an unseen smirk on my face.

“You seem confident about your chances, but Nightmare is a powerful adversary. He would not have conquered several systems without such power. You should not underestimate the wicked forces at his disposal.”

“Us Star Allies have faced off against a wide variety of villains and abominations before,” I argued back proudly. “No villain will be able to penetrate our defenses so long as Kirby and King Dedede are at my side. There is no one else I am prouder to call my companions.”

“Companions…” my other mused. “I once had a few, in the days before I came to Dream Land. Perhaps one day… I may be able to consider my Kirby one of them.”

“Sir!” The front door opened, and we both turned our heads to see Sword Knight and Blade Knight holding some sort of package. “We got you your take-out today!”

Much like back home, these two knights are my counterpart’s loyal servants. Depressingly, I did not see any of my other crewmates under his service. Introducing him to Sailor Dee and Captain Vul is something I should do posthaste.

“Thank you, Sword, Blade. Come, let us eat together.” The four of us gathered around my counterpart’s table, preparing to eat some delicious sandwiches. Mmm, my counterpart has good taste.

…what? A knight is allowed to have simple interests.

“So…” Sword Knight began making conversation. “You’re Meta Knight’s counterpart from that other dimension, right?”

“That is correct,” I confirmed. “It has been a very interesting day, seeing a Dream Land much different than the one I know. Take Dedede, for example. Back home, he is a regal, respectful king. But here, he appears to be more of a juvenile unfit for his crown.”

“Hah! I told you our visitors would think the same as everyone else!” Blade Knight triumphantly declared. “Even this Meta Knight admits it!”

My counterpart chuckled with amusement, his eyes mysteriously turning a shimmering pink. Hmm, that is something new. Since when could us puffballs change their eye color like that? I should investigate further eventually.

“It seems most people in Cappy Town share such an opinion,” he noted. “It is funny, since you have not even been here for a whole day, yet you have already picked up on that.”

“Once you are in the company of my own Dedede for an extended period of time, the differences between him and the counterpart here are very noticeable,” I explained. “Frankly, he should be acting better. It is clear that there are threats all too satisfied to come and take advantage of Dream Land’s sleepy nature. And if the king is unable to push away such threats when the time comes, it will only end up harming Dream Land in the long run.”

For a moment, a silence overtook the table’s atmosphere. “Wow,” Blade Knight said in surprise, “that was a rant I didn’t see coming.”

“It is true,” I replied. “Though sometimes his efforts end up not working, my Dedede has proven time and time again that he has what it takes to defend Dream Land from danger. Something that this world’s Dedede is sorely lacking.”

“You have some valid points, I will admit,” my counterpart said. “But with your squad of Star Warriors around, I am confident that his ways can be changed, given a little time.”

“Dedede? Change?” Sword and Blade looked at each other for a moment before turning back to us. “Yeah, that’ll be the day!”

“Don’t be so quick to dismiss the possibility, my loyal knights. I am sure that my counterpart’s king used to be a little bit like ours, in a way.”

“That is… true,” I admitted. “King Dedede used to have a strong rivalry against Kirby, and he has performed some… questionable acts in the past. But he did eventually grow out of it, so your words have merit.”

“No way…” Sword Knight breathed. “You guys really think so?”

“We’ll just have to wait and see, won’t we?” my counterpart concluded, his eyes once more glimmering pink.

“Say, what is with your eyes glowing different colors?” I decided to ask. “I am not able to do such an action myself.”

(“Finally!” Sword Knight exclaimed. “Someone else notices, too!”)

I could sense a smirk behind my counterpart’s mask. “Allow me a few of my own secrets, would you?”

[King Dedede (Canon)]

Cappy Town – Hill

Man, the kids here are pretty hospitable! I kind of wish these guys were around back home; it’s nice to tell stories about your exploits to others that haven’t heard of them. The Dream Land I rule is a fairly small community, so everyone pretty much knows each other well – which is why I’m relishing in this opportunity.

Who wouldn’t? I’m the great King Dedede, I deserve a little bit of ego-building now and then!

“Heh, that’s a funny scene if I’ve ever heard one,” I laughed heartily. “Kirby sleeping in a tree. I should get Kirbs over here to do the same thing sometime, even catch it on camera!”

“In your dreams,” Kirby smirked. “I’m just fine in my own bed, thank you very much. But if my otherworldly self likes it, then who am I to complain?”

“Poyo! Poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs (as Kirby has taken to him) cheered up and down. “Poyo!”

“That’s right, ‘Lil Kirbs.” Kirby gave his younger counterpart a little rub on the head. “Don’t let anybody stop you from sleeping wherever you want.”

“Well, I don’t mind this arrangement at all!” Tokkori said. He’s, uh, some screechy yellow bird. “Kirby gets to sleep comfortably, I get to sleep comfortably; everybody wins here!” He had dropped in a few minutes into our little meet-up. Like everyone else, he was pretty shocked at the whole dimensional double thing, even made a few groans about it, but he seemed to get over it pretty fast. I think.

He seems like the type of person to never let anything go, so maybe he’s just bottling it up for now.

“I should probably get another house here, though,” Kirby said to himself. “Something tells me we’re going to be here a while.” He turned his attention toward the annoying bird. “You don’t have room for two, do you?”

“What? No way!” Tokkori screeched. “Sleeping in a bed is great, I’m not letting you take it away from me!”

“It’s not like you need all the extra room to sleep,” Kirby argued back. “You’re a bird, you can just make another nest!”

“Besides,” Bandana Dee cut in, “it is Kirby’s house, even if it belongs to a different Kirby. Shouldn’t he get first dibs because of that?”

“How about we compromise?” Tiff suggested. “We can just make another bed for you, Tokkori. We made Kirby’s house once, a bed should be no problem.”

“Hmph. Well, you better make sure it’s as comfortable as the big one! I won’t be accepting any downgrades!”

“Oh boy,” Tuff groaned. “Tokkori just really knows how to give us all a headache.”

“Well, I don’t mind this scene one bit!” I added my two cents. “Dream Land’s always better when we have such colorful residents. We should invite our other friends here sometime. What do you say, Dee?”

“Oh, right!” Dee remembered. “They’d love this place, I’m sure of it!”

“You guys have other friends?” one of the kids – Honey – asked me.

“Yep! Adeleine, Ribbon, Daroach, Gooey, all the rest of our Star Allies! Oh yeah, and we can’t forget my Waddle Dees! I’d never leave my home without my wonderful servants. That being said…” I put a hand under my chin. “I wonder how they’re doing right now? I did leave rather abruptly, and the Warp Hole closed pretty quickly behind us…” But before I could get another word in, the sound of an engine revving got everyone’s attention.

Almost as fast as Captain Falcon (saying ‘as fast as Sonic’ would be a massive insult to Sonic), my counterpart drove his tank up the hill and right by us, a bunch of his Waddle Dees following right behind him (at pretty slow speeds, actually). I don’t know why he needs to drive such a massive tank. I have my Grand Wheelie and he works just fine. He’s even compact, which is more than I can say for that war machine monstrosity. If he’s gonna keep driving a vehicle, at least have it be a cool limousine or something.

“Oh, great,” Tiff groaned. “It’s our Dedede again.”

“I thought we were done with him for the day,” Tuff complained. “What’s he want now?”

“You!” my counterpart declared, dramatically pointing a finger right at me. I raised an eyebrow in response.

“Yes, King Dedede here, how may I help you?” I sardonically greeted him.

“Don’t you take dat tone with me!” I swear, this guy has a temper as short as cherries. “Yer comments earlier are something dat I can’t tolerate!”

“Pfft, if you can’t take being called fat, then I don’t know how you’re gonna stay king,” I remarked. “I’m a little plump myself and you don’t see me complaining about it.”

“He’s got you there, Your Majesty,” the snail noted. Escargoon was his name, I believe. He seems like my counterpart’s answer to Bandana Dee. I don’t think I’d mind having him onboard my ship myself. “You can’t be a perfect king if you aren’t in perfect physical condition.”

“Hmph! I’m already as perfect as can be!” other me dismissed. “So I won’t take insults to my name so easily!” Hopping off the tank, my counterpart whipped out his hammer.

“Hey, you’ve got a pretty nice hammer!” I casually noted. “No, really. You must take pretty good care of it.”

“Enough talking! Time to fight!” He clumsily swung his hammer at me, inducing a lot of gasps from the kids nearby. However, his attack was so clumsy that all I needed to do was walk a few steps away from him.

“Man, you don’t get a lot of exercise, don’t you?” I commented, easily sidestepping every attack he tried to throw at me. I mean, I could run circles around him if this was ’92. Me now, with years of experience from our adventures, plus the Brawl and Smash 4 tournaments? It’s not even a contest.

“Stop dodging my attacks and just take the punishment!” other Dedede roared, continuing his pitiful assault.

“Wow, the other Dedede doesn’t even need to put up a fight!” Tuff remarked. “He’s so cool.”

“I’m scared to see what he’s like with an actual hammer!” Tokkori said.

“Goooooooo, King Dedede!” Kirby cheered. “Go get ‘em!”

“Show him how perfect you are, Great King!” Dee agreed.

“Poyo! Poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs cheered alongside his ‘big brother’.

“Hey, y’all should be cheering for me, not this baloney fake!” other me protested. “I’m just as perfect, too!”

“You’re not doing a very good job showing it. Here, how about I ‘even the odds’ a little?” I yanked out my own hammer from my—well, hammerspace. This hammer, unlike my counterpart’s, has been modified to have a mechanical jet cannon in it. It’s not as cool as my Deluxe Dedede Hammer (you know, the one with all the fancy weaponry), but it’ll do.

With it, I started matching my counterpart’s swings blow-for-blow, and even pushed him back a bit. I could hear the sounds of amazement around me. ‘Whoa’s’ and ‘Holy crud!’s’ echoed into my ear.

“That Dedede may be too much for even His Majesty to handle,” Escargoon pondered. “Which means I need to do something to even the odds. Hey, Waddle Dees! Go assist your King!”

Without warning, I found my feet swarmed with Waddle Dees. “Eh? Hey, you’re not allowed to do something like that!” I griped, trying to shake them off. I could just smash them with my hammer, but they’re Waddle Dees in the service of their king. I can’t fault them for that.

“HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!” other me laughed, showing no regard for this lack of fair play. “I’m just evening the odds here, just like you said!”

“That is not how I meant it,” I grumbled.

“Great King, let me help!” With gusto, Dee sprung into action, using his trusty spear skills to knock back all of the Waddle Dees. But even with his help (which I’m thankful for), there were a lot of Waddle Dees to deal with. Individually, Waddle Dees are Weak, But Skilled (as TV Tropes – that site Kirby likes – would put it), but together they can be formidable. I’d know.

“There’s too many of ‘em!” I said. “And I don’t want to hurt ‘em, even if they aren’t my own Dees.”

“Oh, if only the guys back home made it here!” Dee lamented.

As if on cue, the sound of something opening behind all of us. I shot my gaze toward it – it was another Warp Hole! Before any of us could question where it came from or how it got here, a swarm of Waddle Dees and Waddle Doos poured out, several of them wielding a spear or a parasol, prompting a lot of shouts of surprise. I’d recognize these guys anywhere.

“My Waddle Dees! My Waddle Doos! You made it!” I celebrated. Now it’s a fair fight again!

“My friends! Oh, how I’ve missed you!” Dee similarly declared. I won’t spoil his joy by pointing out he just saw them not a few hours ago.

“WHAT!? You have Waddle Dees too!?” other me whined. “Now you’re just cheating!”

“Says the guy who sicced a bunch of his own Dees on me,” I retorted. “Alright, gang – get ‘em!”

My squadron of Dees and Doos started pushing back the other side, using their superior skill to steadily gain victory. These guys have fought against several alien invasions before, this Dream Land is only just dealing with its first major crisis. And all the while, my counterpart was growling very audibly.

“What? Can’t take the heat?” I teased him. His short temper will be fun to mess around with, I’m sure.

“Thaaaaaat’s it! I’ve had enough of this!” he proclaimed, hopping back into his tank. “Waddle Dees, let’s go! Escargoon, get us outta here!”

“Whatever you say, sire,” Escargoon muttered. “Why’d you even bring us out here if the only thing you’re going to do is leave, anyway?”

“I don’t tell you what to do! Step on it, already!”

As the oversized tank rocketed away, a stream of Waddle Dees trailing behind him, other me’s voice yelled, “This isn’t the last you’ve heard of me, you hear!? I’ll beat you and show everybody who’s the greatest king of Dream Land!”

“Yeah, you just keep dreaming about that!” I shouted back, cupping my hands around my mouth. “And I’ll be here to beat you in any brawl!”

Once the tank’s revving disappeared from our ears, I turned back to my group of Dees. “Oh, you guys are here! This is great! C’mon, give your king a hug!” Immediately, I was bowled over by a ball of ecstatic Dees and Doos, followed by Bandana Dee hugging the rest of his brethren. “Wow, you must’ve really missed me! Heh heh!”

“Wow, that was something I didn’t expect to see,” I heard Kirby say in astonishment. “Mighty conveniently timed, too. There’s probably a trope for this, I’m sure…”

“Woot! Go, Dedede from another dimension!” Tuff cheered. “You were awesome!”

“Yeah, three cheers for Dedede!” the other kids said.

“Man, I never thought I’d see the day when people would actually be cheering for Dedede,” Tokkori commented in his typical ‘I’m-a-jerk!’ tone. “Just goes to show, you can’t expect everything to go as you’d think.”

“Poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs decided to hop on the bandwagon, obliviously joining the other Waddle Dees in their joy as the kids around us repeatedly shouted “Hip hip hooray!” in excitement.

“Don’t worry, you guys,” I laughed, “they’ll be plenty time for welcome back hugs today!”

(“Days in Dream Land aren’t going to be quiet anymore, huh?” Tiff said.

Kirby smirked. “Who said they were ever truly quiet to begin with?” he corrected. “If anything, I think they’re about to get more interesting.”

“I guess that’s one way to put it,” Tiff half-heartedly sighed.)

Chapter Text

[Tiff]

Castle Dedede (Anime) – Ebrum Residence

“Hey, Tiff, look!” Tuff called out to me, running toward my position on the couch. “There’s a letter for you!”

“A letter?” I asked. That’s weird, we don’t get too many letters in Cappy Town, since we’re so small and all. Maybe it’s got something to do with our other-dimensional visitors? With that in mind, I promptly took the letter from his hands. “Who’s it from?”

“I dunno, I just found it by our door. It’s got your name on it, so it must be addressed to you.”

“Let’s see…” Carefully, I opened it up and read its contents.

“It’s from King Dedede. The one that’s nice, I mean,” I mentioned. Huh, I didn’t expect any Dedede to have an affinity for chess. The Star Allies have mentioned their Dream Land being quieter than Cappy Town is (with a ‘kind of’ tacked on for some reason), so I guess they need to find some hobbies to entertain them.

“Ooh, you should go see him!” Tuff suggested. “I mean, he’s a pretty good guy! Remember how he trashed our jerkwad Dedede and told us all those funny stories? That was amazing!”

“Yes, Tuff, I remember that. That was only a couple of weeks ago,” I said. Just because I can be rather short-tempered doesn’t mean I’m forgetful. “I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to see what this Dedede wants.”

“Hey, mind if I join you?” Tuff jumped up and down excitedly, like he was about to get a new video game he really, really wanted. “I wanna see his castle, too! It’s got to be better than even our Dedede’s!”

“Somehow, I really doubt that… but I suppose it wouldn’t hurt,” I said.

“WOO-HOO! Other Castle Dedede, here we come!” Tuff cheered.

Well, at least he’s happy about it.

Castle Dedede (Canon) – Entrance

Just like Dedede said, his castle wasn’t hard to find. On another hill overlooking Cappy Town was a small castle with a couple of ornate decorations. There were some sort of eye-shaped windows up top, while the front door was sealed off by a gate. It looked kind of homely.

Wow, I thought to myself. And to think he built this after only two weeks here!

Being a Dedede, the other-dimensional king had a bunch of Waddle Dees at his disposal, though how the portal they went through got here is a mystery to all of us. And strangely, he also had Waddle Doos. It was weird seeing the latter, because our Dedede only has the single Captain Waddle Doo, rather than a whole brigade of him.

In fact, it was pretty weird seeing Dedede shower all the Waddle Dees and Waddle Doos with so much affection, and vice versa. Our Dedede just carelessly uses them as servants, but the other Dedede really cares about his squad. Heck, when I was passing by here last week, I saw Dedede assisting his Dees in building the castle, carrying a lot of the heavy-duty materials on his shoulder. “Heh heh heh! I can’t just sit here and let my Waddle Dees do all the work, can I?” he had mentioned when I brought it up.

Construction normally takes a lot of time, so it really was surprising finding out they already finished work on the new castle. Beside me, Tuff was similarly amazed. And also a little disappointed. “Aw man, this castle doesn’t look anywhere near as big as ours!”

“Hey, don’t just write it off because it’s smaller,” I said. “Everyone else in Cappy Town is just fine with their houses, if this Dedede wanted a castle this size, then that’s fine. Now come on, let’s go inside.”

There were two Waddle Dees on both sides of the entrance, a spear held tightly in their hands. They appeared to be guarding the entrance – understandable. When the two of us approached, they made some sort of signal, and the castle gates opened up. Running out was this Dedede’s faithful servant, Bandana Dee. “You two actually came!” he welcomed us. “I was worried I’d be Dedede’s only challenger today.”

“Hey, Bandana Dee!” Tuff greeted him back. “How’s Dedede?”

“He’s doing fine!” Bandana Dee assured us. “Great King’s setting up the chessboard for you guys’ visit. While you’re here, you should come see the rest of our castle!”

The three of us walked inside, and whoa. This castle was bright and yellow and colorful; a lot more striking than the dull greens of home. There were a few portraits of Dedede and his friends hanging around, too, and everyone in the pictures looked like they were having a fun time.

Waddle Dees and Waddle Doos were also walking around the hallways. I understood them having the spears by their side, but what was with the parasols? How are you supposed to fight with those? Maybe Kirby knows; it seems like something that would be a Copy Ability.

“I think we’ve recreated our home castle pretty well,” Bandana Dee was saying. “This isn’t the first time we’ve had to construct it from scratch.”

“Wait, really? What’s happened to your castle before?” I inquired.

“Dream Land may be a quiet place, but it’s all too often the target of so many villains. During the Robobot invasion, our whole castle was destroyed in one fell swoop, so Great King wasn’t able to do a lot beyond sheltering refugees. But Kirby and Meta Knight were there to save the day!”

“It sounds like you guys have been through a lot,” I noticed.

“Yeah, but I’d never trade living in Dream Land for anything else!” Bandana Dee proudly proclaimed. “Oh, and here we are!” The bandana-wearing servant opened up another set of doors, and inside was a fantabulous throne room, large and held up by several pillars. There was a lengthy red carpet stretched out the middle of the room, perfectly going up a flight of miniature stairs leading up the throne. A small table sat in-between the throne itself and a small chair, a chessboard right on top of it.

Attending to said chessboard was the other-dimensional King Dedede himself, bent over and carefully placing all the chess pieces in the right place. Looking around, I could see several Waddle Dees standing guard, much like how our Dedede sets up his guards.

“And that’s the last piece,” he was muttering to himself. He stood up, a satisfied look on his face. “Now we’re ready!” His eyes were soon drawn to me and Tuff. “Oh, hey there, Tiff, Tuff! I’m glad you two could make it here!”

“It’s a pleasure to be here,” I politely told him.

“Man, I thought this castle would be pretty lame, but it’s actually looks pretty cool!” Tuff exclaimed loudly. Oh come on, I thought he would have better manners than that!

“Tuff, be nice!” I admonished. “You can’t just be rude like that to everyone.”

“No, it’s fine!” Dedede laughed. “Most people who see my castle are pretty underwhelmed by it initially. But it’s a comfortable place for me and my Dees, and that’s what matters.”

“Do you have a playroom?” Tuff asked excitedly. “You’ve gotta have something like that here!”

“Of course I do! Dee here—“ He pointed toward Bandana Dee, who waved a hand in the air. “—can show you where it is. The two Kirbies should be there right now, actually, and I just got the Wii U reinstalled too.”

“Awesome! Come on, let’s go! I wanna see what games they have!” Tuff raced as fast as he could out of the room, Bandana Dee frantically trying to keep up.

“Hold up, Tuff!” he yelled, his voice soon echoing out of the room. “You’re moving too fast for meeeeeeeee!”

Soon, it was just me and King Dedede in the throne room. “That was entertaining,” the king heartily stated, a grin on his face. He plopped down onto his throne, ready to begin. “Well, shall we begin our game? I’ve been dying for a good, regular challenger who isn’t Dee.”

“I suppose that is what I came here for. Alright, I’ll play.” I sat down in the chair opposite of Dedede, and the two of us began to play.

I’ll admit, this Dedede isn’t too bad a chess player! It was clear that he had plenty of experience – he mentioned something about “I’ve learned a lot from all of my Smasher friends! Robin especially can give me a hard time,” which I didn’t really understand – and it was actually pretty engaging! We were giving the both of us a run for our monies, another thing I didn’t expect out of a Dedede.

“So, Dedede,” I made conversation, “what do you like to do in your Dream Land?”

“I like to take some nice walks when I’m not doing kingly business. Dream Land’s a beautiful place when it’s not being invaded by another crazy villain—“ (Another? I thought. Sounds a lot like our monster situation.) “—and it’s always nice to go out and smell the sweet flowers. Kirby even joins me sometimes, and I even say hello to all of the good guys outside.”

“You sound like a pretty respectful king,” I remarked. Now I’m wishing our Dedede was a little more like him. “Kind of a far cry from what your Kirby says you used to be.”

“Oh yeah,” Dedede chuckled. “I used to be an insecure brat back then, trying to ‘prove’ myself to be the greatest king around. In retrospect, I don’t really know what I was thinking, trying to steal all the food from everyone. It certainly didn’t do me any favors with everyone’s opinion of me.”

“I’m surprised they still let you be king after all of that,” I added. “Then again, our Dedede’s still king even though almost everybody doesn’t like him.”

“That’s authority for ya! That’s how I became king of Dream Land – I just walked up, declared that I’d be the first king of Dream Land, and nobody really protested my actions much.”

“That’s… not too surprising, actually,” I said.

“It took me a long time before I ever became a king worthy of his subjects. I’ve got Kirby and Dee both to thank for that, to be honest.”

“Really?” Kirby mentioned before that they used to be pretty hostile before they warmed up toward each other, though he didn’t mention any specifics. Against my better judgement, I found that I’m actually… curious about this. “What do you mean, Dedede?”

“I remember when Kirby first arrived on Pop Star. It was actually pretty quiet. He just dropped off his ship in some cave and casually integrated himself amongst everyone. I kind of dismissed him myself until he confronted me on the whole ‘food-stealing’ thing a month later.” A fond expression appeared on his face – the same one the elder Kirby had. Best friends think alike, I guess. “I’ll say this – he may be small, but he can put up a good fight!”

“No kidding.” My Kirby’s proven himself to be a strong opponent himself, taking on all sorts of demon beasts with strength that no one else has. Heck, I don’t think even Meta Knight can match up to Kirby at full power, and he’s a capable swordsman himself!

“And that’s how our long-standing friendship began. It didn’t quite start as friendship at first, of course. I used to think he was a pest, and we butted heads over the tiniest of things. We even had a food race one time!”

“You mean, eating food as fast as possible?” That sounds like something Kirby and Dedede would do.

“No. I’m talking about a race where you pick up food along the way. Yeah, it was pretty petty, but it was also pretty fun.”

…uhh, what? A literal food race? That’s… an interesting concept. It seems like a tremendous waste, if I’m being honest. Our Kirby eats a lot of food already – using it in something as petty as a race just seems so… So… Dumb!

It’s also something I could see both ours and this Dedede doing. No matter how you slice it, Dedede will always have Dedede qualities, I guess.

“Eventually, Kirby’s kindness and his sassiness – I know, I know, those sound like oxymorons – finally wore me down. We’ve gone through a lot together since then – different lands, different planets, and we’ve defeated many a bad guy with our hammers. I’m proud to call him my very best friend. ‘Course, that doesn’t mean we won’t have a spar every now and then! Heck, maybe we can have one of our classic prank wars here! Just because I’ve matured doesn’t mean I can’t be mischievous every now and then, after all.” Dedede laughed a laugh that was slowly, but surely starting to grow on me. It’s a laugh that really suited this Dedede, I think.

His niceness was kind of disconcerting at first, but I think I’m really liking it.

“If only our Dedede was more like you,” I lamented. “I don’t know why he has such a knee-jerk reaction to Kirby. He’s not that bad of a person, yet he’s always trying to kick him out with a load of monsters.”

“I think it has something to do with a desire for respect,” Dedede reasoned. “Me, I initially just hated Kirby out of principle. For my counterpart… Well, both of our Kirbies have taken quite a liking to the villagers here, and deserved though it may be, my alternate self doesn’t get any of that.”

“You… You really think so?” I’ve never thought about our Dedede that way. To me and to Cappy Town, he’s just been an overbearing tyrant who always gets in our way. If his acting out really is more than just a childish tantrum… then it might shed some light on why he keeps sending monsters after Kirby.

He just… wants someone to like him.

…he’s not exactly making it easy to do that, though.

I mean, he taxes all of us at insane prices – even my family is barely immune from that! And not to mention his disregard for all of our requests, his constant plots to clobber Kirby, and him always interfering with everything. It’s just so… so infuriating!

“Well, until the day he finally gets his act together, I’m still not going to like him,” I decided. “Me and Kirby, we’ll keep thwarting his schemes until everything’s done!” Just because our Dedede has a reason to be a jerk doesn’t mean he should be a jerk! And if he never grows up, then that’s fine with me!

“Fair enough,” Dedede said. “Oh, and by the way – checkmate.”

“Huh?” I looked down at the chessboard, and true to what he said, I had lost. “Wow, you’re good at this!” I’m not kidding when I say that, really.

“Heh heh! Sure, I’m not an expert, and there are plenty others who can beat me good, but I’m no slouch myself,” he stated proudly. “Good game, Tiff.”

“You too, King Dedede.” I saw him close his eyes in satisfaction. Maybe some time, I should play another game of chess with him. I think it would be a nice change of pace from fighting so many demon beasts.

Our musing was soon interrupted by the sound of footsteps clapping through the halls, with Tuff’s voice audible through the walls of the throne room. “Hey, Kirby, we still need that controller!” my brother was yelling.

The two of us opened the doors to the throne room, and before us we saw Tuff, Bandana Dee, and the other Kirby chasing around our Kirby – the latter of which was holding up some sort of tablet and running around with the biggest smile on his face. “Come on, ‘Lil Kirbs!” the other Kirby was saying, “not everyone likes chase sequences, you know!”

I sighed. “Man, they’re acting so childish.” Suddenly, I noticed someone missing from my side. “Hey, Dedede? Where did you—?”

And then I saw King Dedede joining the chase with the other kids. “Don’t leave your king outta this now!” he happily exclaimed, jollily running about without a care in the world.

…well, I’ll admit, it wasn’t an altogether terrible scene to bear witness to. “Kids,” I muttered, with a smile on my face.

Chapter Text

[Kirby (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Kirby’s House

Hmm, that sure is one heck of a feast.

I was in my and ‘Lil Kirbs’ shared house, watching as he inhaled from piles upon piles of miscellaneous fruit, all bundled up in our one single room. This guy has a metabolism rate so much bigger than mine. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like eating food too, but ‘Lil Kirbs here takes it to a new level.

I suppose he is a growing child, though I don’t know of any child that can eat that much… except for maybe that weird other Pac-Man that wandered into the Smash Mansion once. That was pretty weird.

Oh yeah, and Tokkori was here too. In the short time I’ve been here, I’ve known this: he’s an annoying little prick. No, really, he likes to just laze about and snark on everything. Too bad his snark is too snippy to appreciate. “What do we live in, the produce department?” he sniped. “You better make sure to eat all of it, because I’m certainly not cleaning it all up!”

“You’re really lucky we don’t get stomachaches, ‘Lil Kirbs,” I said. “I hope we have a broom nearby.”

“Poyo poyo!” His voice was a bit muffled by the giant watermelon he was trying to consume, but I could tell he wasn’t really paying attention. He was content to gorge himself on all the food around. I could relate, I used to be like that too in my infant years.

I must admit, it’s been pretty fine living in this Dream Land. Sure, we don’t exactly know how to get back to ours yet, but we’ve settled in pretty nicely, I think. Just like we said, we got Tokkori his own tiny bed, and though he grumbled and complained, he snuggled in alright.

Meta Knight’s staying with his counterpart too. Dedede offered to lend him a room, but he respectfully declined. Someday we’ll get him to lower down his noble knight personality a little more, but I suppose we can’t rush things. At least he doesn’t flee from the big Smash Mansion Food Fights anymore. I call that progress!

Surprisingly, this world’s Dedede hasn’t really done much to us beyond loudly complain about our mere presence. He hasn’t harassed us much beyond trying to bother his counterpart in his castle. Right now all that’s happened is Dee-to-Dee combat, but something tells me it’ll be escalating before long.

We’ve adjusted to all the villagers, too. They’re really nice – though they were surprised when I didn’t end up “sucking up all the food in sight” (their words, not mine). The department store dude was pretty disappointed I didn’t have any of their Dedede dollars (whatever they’re called). Or even any money from our dimension.

Our Dream Land’s a sleepy place. We get along fine without currency – though if worst comes to worst, we have those Star Tokens that are always flying about.

I have to admit, Kawasaki’s was a highlight. Sure, his food is basically inedible to literally everybody else, but I’ve been known to eat a lot of stuff considered to have weird taste by my fellow Smashers and not really bat an eye, so this Kawasaki’s food wasn’t really too bad. Maybe I could take part-time as a cook. Just ‘cause there’s no enemies around to boil doesn’t mean I don’t know how to use a cookbook!

And there are plenty of other guys in this dimension that look like the guys I know, yet at the same time, they aren’t. Take Lololo and Lalala, for example. They can fly, they were actually originally one person (I don’t even…), and they’re servants to Tiff’s family. And I’ve never seen them pushing weird emerald boxes once.

There’s Kine, who can’t move outside of water (Which… actually makes sense. I have got to figure out how our Kine can do that.), has no combat potential whatsoever, and… has a crush on Tiff?

…I’m not touching that weirdness with any sort of staff.

I’ve also heard things about Whispy Woods, who is… less aggressive than ours (I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve had to beat him up) and also has a bunch of equally sentient brethren at his side. I bet he could give Flowery Woods a run for his money – if this world’s Dedede weren’t intent on razing his forest for some sort of country club.

Overall… I think this Dream Land’s pretty neat. I can’t wait to introduce the rest of our Star Allies to this crew. It’ll be glorious.

As I continued my musing, a Warp Star flew through the window and went right underneath ‘Lil Kirbs without warning.

Huh, so that’s what his Warp Star looks like. It’s flatter; probably a lot more polygons too. I wonder if he has a phone for it.

In response to it, he spat out his watermelon (that was still whole, by the way), hitting Tokkori right in the face. (Yeah, you get ‘em!) The Warp Star proceeded to fly straight out the window to heavens knows where.

“Sorry, Kirby,” I heard Tuff’s voice from outside, “but we don’t have time to explain!”

“We’ll get you something to eat later!” Tiff’s voice followed.

I peeked out the window, curious as to what was happening, and noticed Tiff and Tuff right beside my house. “Hey, Tiff, Tuff! Something going on today?” I greeted them.

“Oh, Kirby! You need to be careful today!” Tiff said to me. “There’s some tough guy going around that wants to fight you and our Kirby.” To Tokkori, she demanded, “Tokkori, you need to go into Cappy Town and warn everyone there! And quickly, too!”

“Well, alright,” the bird said, flapping away. “Hope it’s a food fight he wants!”

“So, there’s some tough guy around? What’s he like?” I asked. This doesn’t sound like any big guy, like Dark Matter or something. “Whoever he is, I’m sure I can handle him no ‘prob.”

“You should’ve seen him!” Tuff exclaimed. “He was this… purple kid, and he was a pretty strong fighter! He was so strong, he knocked out all the walls! It would be cool if it wasn’t so scary!”

Personally, that kind of danger level sounds more inconveniencing than actually a threat, but what do I know? I’ve faced so many Eldritch Abominations that my expectations are a bit skewed. “Purple kid, huh?” I mused aloud. “Where would he happen to be right now, anyway?”

“We don’t know,” Tuff answered. “He just took off after our Dedede and Escargoon told him about Kirby.”

“Hmm…” That didn’t sound good. Menaces able to run about Dream Land is always a recipe for disaster. “Well, worse comes to worst, I know Meta and Dedede can take care of the problem!”

“Really? I haven’t seen them all day,” Tiff said.

“Maybe they’re sleeping in,” Tuff suggested.

“Whatever the case, they’ll be able to handle things. Now… Uhh, where did you take ‘Lil Kirbs? If things get pear-shaped, we’re gonna want to be by him. Hopefully none of us will get this new enemy right up in our faces, or something.”

[King Dedede (Canon)]

Castle Dedede (Canon) – Dedede’s Bedroom

“Hey, you! Tubby!” some sort of gruff kiddy voice broke through my consciousness. “Get up! I’ve got… to ask…!”

I groaned, turning over in my bed. “Five more minutes, Dee…” I mumbled, snuggling up to my pillow. I don’t really want to wake up right now, Dee; let me sleep in a little bit.

“Don’t just… back to sleep! Tell… where Kirby…!”

I couldn’t really hear what the voice was saying, but I think it was something about Kirby. Eh, whatever it was, he could find out himself. Kirby isn’t hard to find, Cappy Town’s a small place after all. “Lemme sleep, I’m tired…” I tried aloud again.

There, that should be enough. Now, I can get back to dreaming about that Gourme—

Suddenly, I was abruptly thrown off my kingly bed and onto the floor – quite rudely, at that! “Hey, what was that for!?” I shouted, now fully awake. If this guy thinks he can just waltz on up to my bedroom and punt me around, he’s gonna get a walloping! It was a good beauty sleep, the best one I’ve had since we got here!

Enraging me even further were my loyal Waddle Dees strung along my bedroom, evidently having tried to defend against this intruder to no avail. How dare this jerk, flinging around my Dees like they’re some sort of enemy! Why, I oughta—!

And then I noticed just who the intruder was.

Sure, he looked a little more anime than usual (What was with the eyes?). And sure, he was purple and red for… some reason, but I knew what this guy was.

He’s… a Knuckle Joe.

Huh.

That’s new.

“…a Knuckle Joe?” I asked aloud. “What are you doing here? I could’ve sworn there weren’t any possible Helpers around Cappy Town.” And no, the other Waddle Dees and that Captain Doo don’t count. Maybe Kawasaki, though. Sure, his cooking’s terrible, but Kirby likes it well enough.

“I dunno what you’re talking about,” he said in that strange rough voice, “and I dunno why you look so similar to the other tubby here—“ He must’ve already been to my counterpart. I hope he didn’t put up any bad impressions of me just because we look alike. “—but I’m looking for Kirby. Now, where is he!?”

“…Kirby?” Dude wanted to see Kirby? This guy’s obviously a threat, I’m not gonna let him do that! “Well, normally I’d tell you, but after you went so far as to knock around me and my guards, I don’t think I’m inclined to say anything. You can take your questions and get outta my castle!” I’m hoping he’ll say no; I’m itching to throw around this hammer ‘o mine.

“No can do, tubby. I’m going to find Kirby, and when I do, I’ll make him pay for what he did to my father!”

“Gee, boo-hoo for you, but I’m ‘fraid you’re barking up the wrong tree. Now either get out, or I’ll smack you out!”

“Great King!” And wouldn’t you know it, there’s my trusty Bandana Dee, here to help! “There’s an intruder in the castle! You have to wake up, the others can’t—!” It was just then that he noticed the intruder already in my bedroom. “Oh no! Great King! Are you okay!?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I said, whipping out my hammer. “Just help me take this guy down, Dee!”

“On it, Great King!”

Knuckle Joe rubbed a finger under his non-existent nose. Was he wiping it or something? “Heh! Just because it’s two-on-one doesn’t mean nothing!” He began to kick repeatedly, streams of energy coming out. “Vulcan Jab! Vulcan Jab!”

The two of us – me and Dee – jumped out of the way as the shockwaves slammed into the walls, messing up my bedroom even more. Great, it’s gonna be a hassle to clean this up! Hopefully there’s still a broom for Kirby to eat later. “Great King, we need to head outside!” Dee recommended.

“You’re right, I’m not letting him make more of a mess in here!” We ran out the door and into the throne room, where there was plenty of space to move about. “Get back here!” I heard Knuckle Joe cry out, his footsteps matching pace with ours. “Smash Punch!”

An even larger wave of energy fired at us, but this time I was ready for it. I hoisted my hammer and knocked it away into the ceiling. When you’ve been fighting Kirby for so long, you learn how to get creative with defending. And I’m not gonna tank any hits through just Guarding, thank you very much!

Holding my hammer up, I began to use a special technique of mine – the Dedede Hammer Cannon. It allows me to shoot an arrow-like wave with precision. It doesn’t have too many uses, but it’s certainly helped me out of a jam in Floralia.

As Knuckle Joe entered the room, I fired the shot. He lifted his arms to guard against it before throwing a few more Vulcan Jabs at us. “Vulcan Jab! Vulcan Jab!” I have no idea why he has to say his attacks like an anime protagonist, but at least it makes it easy to expect them. Bandana Dee sprang into action, twirling his spear and dissipating each strike as it approached. While he did that, I jumped into the air and attempted to slam my hammer down on him.

Unfortunately, he easily dodged out of the way and sent a Spin Kick at me. It connected, and let me tell you, it wasn’t a very comfortable feeling. “Oof!” I grunted, stumbling back a bit. It wasn’t a very hard kick – Kirby hits harder – but it was still enough to send me reeling.

Bandana Dee struck back, lobbying a triad of spears and then some at Joe. Knuckle Joe jumped around to try and get around them, but plenty managed to scrape his skin in the process. “Tch!” While he was distracted, I dashed behind him and thrust my hammer out, giving him a good smack. He attempted to throw his fists at me, but I countered with my own fairly strong fists.

Smash Bros. is good exercise, trust me.

“This is a waste of my time! I should be looking for Kirby, not picking a fight with you two bozos!” Knuckle Joe growled.

“You’re the one who wants to hurt my friend,” I retorted. “I’m just making sure you don’t get the chance! Plus, you need to pay for repairs to the castle!”

“Yeah, and don’t forget my brethren!” Dee interjected. That’a boy!

Speaking of which, my guards finally managed to charge into the room. Waddle Dees and Waddle Doos, several with spears, shot their gaze right at the intruding Knuckle Joe. Before any of them could go forth, he yelled “Spin Kick!”, made a path through the crowd of Dees, and ran through. “You can have your party, I’ll find Kirby someplace else!”

“Hey, get back here!” Dee and I immediately started trying to chase him. Unfortunately, for as much as I’m less chubbier than this ‘verse’s Dedede, I’m nowhere near as agile as say, Fox or Mario. And Dee can’t exactly help in that area, either.

By the time we made it outside, Knuckle Joe was nowhere to be seen. Our heads turned up and down the place, but we saw no hair of his strange white hair anywhere. “Dang!” I cursed. “We can’t just let him run about like that! With his strength, the Cappies could get hurt!” This may not be my Dream Land, but I’m still a king, and this is still a Dream Land. And a king has a duty to the goodwill of his subjects!

“It seems like exciting times have come upon Dream Land,” that soothing Mexican accent filled my ears. Turning around, I saw the two Meta Knights (plus their sidekicks, I forget their names) running up toward us. “You look like you just had an encounter with Knuckle Joe.”

“Tell me about it,” I groaned. “He just threw my guards around, smacked me around, and then he just left as if we weren’t important! He should be more considerate toward the royalty around here.”

“This is the first crisis I’ve seen on this Dream Land,” my Meta Knight began speaking, “and we cannot allow it to continue any further than it already has.” He’s taking this seriously as usual. I don’t think this warrants HWC or Dark Matter levels of serious, but that’s what makes him effective at threat control. “This Knuckle Joe… It is best we find and subdue him before harm is done onto the villagers.”

“We’ll have to split up then,” I said, getting into a commanding mode. “Me, Dee, and the rest of my guard will head into Cappy Town and ward Joe off if he happens to show up. You Meta Knights can probably take to the sky and look out for him that way.”

“Actually…” Mexican Meta spoke up. (I think I’ll just call him that from now on.) “I’m afraid I don’t possess the wings my counterpart has, so I can’t be of use in that area.” …oh. I didn’t see that coming. “However, my knowledge of Dream Land’s geography means I can most certainly get around in an efficient manner.”

“Wow!” Dee’s eyes were shining with respect. “That sounds amazing! You must be a pretty good knight!”

“You do know I’m right here, right?” our Meta interjected.

“Alright, you two patrol Dream Land however you can with your sidekicks,” I said, hearing a sharp “Hey!” came from the other two knights hanging about in response. “If all goes well, this won’t turn out to be anything big. And don’t forget to look for Kirby too – that Joe seemed interested in him, something about ‘what he did to my father,’ whatever that means.” Mexican Meta’s eyes seemed to shine a dark green at my words. I dunno what that’s supposed to indicate, but I’ll leave it alone. “Now… Let’s move out, guys!”

[Meta Knight (Anime)]

Dream Land (Anime)

The two of us – me and my counterpart – were travelling alone around Dream Land, he keeping grounded in order to have better cooperation. Sword and Blade were elsewhere looking for Joe. Hopefully, with the four of us at hand (and Dedede’s army of Waddle Dees), we will be able to track down our intruder before he does something he cannot take back.

I could never have expected – not even in my wildest dreams – that the son of my friend would be here, on this planet, just a few scant weeks after the arrival of our dimensional duplicates. Truly, it is quite the twist of fate – especially with the two identical Star Warriors on the very same planet. I know not of how he has been raised after the death of his father, but… this certainly cannot be good.

…my counterpart has been rather quiet since we started our search. “Your eyes flashed when Dedede made mention of Knuckle Joe’s motives,” he finally began, breaking through my thoughts. He is certainly a perceptive knight. It is a good trait to have when you are dealing with conflict. “I do not believe in coincidences, so it leads me to believe you have some sort of history with our recent intruder. What is it?”

 “…Knuckle Joe is the son of an old friend of mine,” I began. If my counterpart was surprised, he showed nothing of it. “He died long ago in my arms, leaving his son alone. It should be me he should be coming to, yet our Dedede has led him off-track, and it may have dire consequences.”

“That sounds… troubling,” my counterpart mentioned. “What worries do you have in your mind?”

“I fear what Joe will do under the misconception that it is Kirby which he seeks,” I said. “Your Kirby will be fine, being an experienced fighter… but ours is very much just a child. I cannot let Joe do what he wants, not while our Kirby is still so defenseless.”

Admittedly… I am growing rather attached to the young Star Warrior. He is like a representation of my chance at redemption, after the destruction of the Galaxy Soldier Army against Nightmare. Not to mention, he has a long way ahead of him before he becomes a full-fledged Star Warrior, and it brings me joy to see him slowly learn. I don’t want to see that light snuffed out now.

“Then we must move posthaste to get to Knuckle Joe before it is too late,” my counterpart nodded with resolute determination. “So long as we are on this planet, I refuse to let any threat pass us by and wreak havoc. Just because our fears will haunt over us does not mean we will grant them victory.”

He seems always determined and confident. I wonder if he has ever truly seen tragedy like I have. He’s never made mention of any death beyond that of the Star Allies’ foes. Do Kirby and King Dedede share such an odd dilemma as well?

…perhaps it would be a blessing. All the destruction that I have seen… I would not want it to interrupt the happiness that both Dream Lands have.

War just doesn’t suit them.

“…I will lay my trust in you,” I at last stated. “If you truly believe that it will all turn out fine… then I must at least believe it too, just this once.”

He chuckled. “I must be going soft,” he thought. “I’d never say such words of encouragement before I landed on Pop Star.”

“The Star Allies must have been a very positive source of growth for you, as much as Cappy Town is for me.”

“One could say that, yes.”

Just then, the sound of chaos could be heard erupting nearby – and conveniently, we were close to Cappy Town. “Hmm?” my counterpart hummed curiously. “What could that be?”

[Bandana Dee]

Cappy Town

Great King and I were running all about Cappy Town trying to catch up to Knuckle Joe. While I’m happy we’re not dealing with another Haltmann Works or Jambastion situation, that doesn’t mean this doesn’t worry the heck outta me!

I mean, what if Joe spreads his reign of terror to all the Waddle Dees here! We’d never survive!

It’d be a crime of the highest order!

The greatest threat to ever hit the Gamble Galaxy!

So we can’t let that happen! Unfortunately, that means running ragged in an attempt to stop Knuckle Joe. And he’s fast. And dodgy. And good at punching.

Suffice to say, it was going to be a long ride.

I heard Great King mumble something about “being like playing tag with Sonic.” I remember seeing that Sonic fellow once. He was nice, if a bit too speedy for my tastes.

The villagers were all crying out too as Joe ran past them.

“Huh!?”

“What’s going on!?”

“Stop! You’re in violation of the speed limit here!”

…I’m not sure that last part’s enforceable, but he’s trying! A for Effort!

“Come on, Dee!” Great King urged me as several of my brethren ran past. “We can’t let Joe escape from us! He’s already gotten this far!”

“I’m going, Great King! I’m going!” I panted. My feet felt like they were on fire! How does Kirby do this all the time!? Even with the amount of practice I’ve gotten from our adventures past 2010, it’s still tiring!

And it doesn’t help that we don’t have legs like Adeleine.

At last, we burst into the convenience store Joe just ran into, his fist currently holding the poor shopkeep’s collar. We can’t let that stand!

“…oh, great,” Joe groaned as he looked in our direction. “It’s you two bozos again. And you brought more wackjobs, too. I don’t have time for this!”

“You better stop right there, Knuckle Joe!” Great King declared, an open palm out. He looked so regal and filled with authority, it was simply awe-inspiring! “We’re gonna stop you from… doing whatever it is you want with Kirby!”

“You can’t stop me!” Joe scoffed. That fiend! “I’ll find Kirby, and when I do, I’ll make him pay!” The purple-skinned crazy dude proceeded to smash through a nearby wall and out of our sight. Hey, you can’t do that! We need to catch you!

“Well that’s just great,” Great King groaned. Cupping his hands to his mouth, he shouted, “Dees! Doos! After that Joe!”

The guards around us ran straight back out the door, attempting to get at Joe. Admittedly, they weren’t really any faster than we were, but sheer numbers can beat this, right?

My hopes were quickly dashed as my fellow Dees and Doos were just flown about the place, Joe crying out various forms of “Vulcan Jab!” and “Smash Punch!”. But at least they managed to get a few scratches in! T-That’s good, right?

“C-Come on, Great King!” I implored my king. “We can’t let them fight him alone!”

“Give me a moment, I-I’m a little tuckered out too!” Great King admitted.

“HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!” A familiar voice rang through the air, and in response we looked up to see Great King’s interdimensional counterpart (I call him ‘Other King’ for reference) driving up to us in his oversized vehicle thing, several of his own Waddle Dees by his side. (I sniffed. Don’t worry, my other dimensional brethren… someday, you’ll see how great our own king is, too!) “Whaddya doin’, tryin’ to stop our friend here? He’s just itchin’ for a good-natured pummelin’, that’s all!”

“When he says he wants to do something to Kirby, I can’t exactly let that slide,” Great King said.

“Well, I can! Anyone who can clobber dat there Kirby is good in my books!” Why does he keep using that word in relation to Kirby? I swear he’s never picked up a thesaurus in his entire life. “You just sit there and watch the show!”

“Pfft, that’ll be the day!” Great King retorted.

For a moment, all the two Kings did was glare at each other, with the snail (Escargoon) muttering, “Oh boy, this is gonna be loud.” The two of them then proceeded to point at each other and declared, “Waddle Dees! Show ‘em no mercy!”

“Go, my friends! For Kirby and the Great King!” I added.

From afar, I heard one of the villagers say, “Ooh, Waddle Dee fight! This I gotta see!"

[Meta Knight (Canon)]

I stared at the scene before me in disbelief.

This was simply absurd.

My counterpart and I were perching atop one of the many rooftops in Cappy Town, only to bear witness to the two King Dededes having what some of the more… ‘trendy’ Smashers would describe as an ‘appendage-measuring contest’. Two armies of Dees were just barraging each other, their respective Kings and loyal assistants cheering them on while they were completely ignoring the threat of Knuckle Joe.

In fact, they seem to have forgotten it entirely.

I sighed. As much as Dedede has matured, I suppose it is only natural that shades of his other traits would come to the surface every now and then.

My counterpart was amused by this, at least. His eyes were glowing a shimmering pink. “And here I believed kings were supposed to be able to focus on the bigger threat,” he commented toward me.

“…I suppose it isn’t exactly like we are facing another Haltmann situation,” I reluctantly admitted. It is better he be distracted during minor threats than major, though that does not in any way mean he should be distracted in the first place. “While they are… preoccupied, we should take the time to scour Cappy Town, and fast. Joe won’t be here forever.”

“You’re right. Let us be off.”

[Kirby (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Unspecified Cave

“This is kind of boring,” I said to ‘Lil Kirbs. He gave off a sad “Poyo” in response. It was clear he wanted to keep eating his feast of fruits.

Until all the commotion cleared with—uhh, now that I think about it, I don’t think I ever found out just whoever our newest visitor was. Well, until all the commotion’s cleared up, ‘Lil Kirbs has to stay here for his own safety. I myself could handle things pretty easily, but ‘Lil Kirbs definitely can’t say the same – especially not alone.

I know that whoever this ‘tough guy’ is must be a fairly sizable threat by ‘Lil Kirbs’ standards, but that doesn’t stop the whole waiting here thing to be as boring as heck.

“You wouldn’t happen to have a paintbrush lying around anywhere, do you?” I asked my childish counterpart. It was a weird question to ask, but it was perfectly plausible. I mean, I have paint-offs with Adeleine, Elline, and Vividra a lot, so I’d say my Artist skills are pretty above-average. ‘Tis be at least something to do while we’re just sitting here.

Alas, ‘Lil Kirbs shook his head. He probably didn’t even know what a paintbrush was. “Poyo poyo. Poyo?”

I could hear he wanted to know what was going on. “Don’t worry, ‘Lil Kirbs. We’re just having a bit of an… intruder problem. It shouldn’t be too bad, we just… have to sit out here! Waiting! …the whole day. A-Actually, that does sound pretty bad.”

“Poyo poyo.” I was well-versed in Poyoese, and judging by the look on ‘Lil Kirbs’ face, that basically translated to ‘I just want to eat right now.’ I could sympathize. Puffballs normally have high metabolism rates; it’s probably because of our black hole stomaches. Let me tell you this: Meta Knight will never admit it, but I know he has a bit of a sweet tooth beneath his mask.

That fact won’t exactly help us right now though, considering I forgot to bring any sort of entertainment whatsoever. So until Tiff and Tuff arrived, we’re basically going to be doing a lot of nothing in here.

“…poyo.”

“I know, ‘Lil Kirbs, I know. Don’t worry, we’ll… wait it out. Somehow.”

…I know I still have my Sleep cap with me somewhere, at least…

Chapter Text

[Kirby (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Unspecified Cave

I think we were in that cave something like a few hours?

I kind of lost track after just one hour, to be honest. By that point, I had gone straight to sleep, my trusty sleeping cap perched right on my head. Probably not a wise idea, considering I can sleep through entire invasions (and boy, was that embarrassing), but it’s not like there was a lot of stuff to do in there.

I could feel ‘Lil Kirbs following my actions, sleeping right next to me without a care in the world (except his growling stomach). It took him a lot longer to fall asleep though, fidgeting around for quite a while. He’s so active, it’s pretty cute.

After what felt like the equivalent of an eternity, I was awoken by the sound of a bunch of stuff dropping to the floor. And so was ‘Lil Kirbs. Immediately, I heard him give a happy “Poyo!”, and I opened my eyes to see what the fuss was about.

Tiff, Tuff, and Kawasaki had come, and they brought with them quite the supply of food. It wasn’t as big as the fruit feast back home, but I suppose it didn’t really matter to ‘Lil Kirbs, as he was already gobbling down food at a pretty fast rate. It also had a watermelon, and he does like watermelons a lot. “Oh, you guys are back!” I said, grabbing a tomato and popping it into my mouth. “So, what’s been going on in Cappy Town since we got in here?”

“That guy I mentioned earlier, he’s been rampaging throughout Cappy Town, saying that our Kirby did something terrible,” Tiff explained. “I don’t know what he’s talking about, but it can’t be a good thing.”

“But I think if they actually get into a fight, our Kirby might lose,” Tuff said.

Kawasaki chimed in, “Yeah, that kid’s tougher than my Salisbury steak! He tore up so many walls – I could make a drive-thru out of mine!”

“I saw Dedede – the other Dedede, I mean – trying to fight back against him, though! It was cool, you should’ve seen him!”

Tiff’s exasperated voice added, “Yeah, but not before he and our Dedede decided to get into a fight with their Waddle Dees and ignore the actual threat.” Yeah, that sounds like Dedede. He’s still got an ego, even after all this time.

“…well, at least he’s trying,” I said. I looked back at ‘Lil Kirbs, who appeared to have not paid a single dollar’s worth of attention to what we were saying. Unfortunately, no matter how much experience he has in fighting demon beasts, he probably won’t stand a chance against someone with actual malicious intent. “Luckily for us, we’ve got the rest of the night to come up with a battle plan. Maybe we can lure him out with food, or something. Worked before with Marx…”

“Who’s Marx?” Tuff asked, but before I could answer him, we were interrupted.

“Hey, sorry to interrupt your snack,” a familiar voice greeted us from outside, “but we’ve got a surprise for you. Heh heh heh…”

The four of us turned to the entrance of the cave, and lo and behold, it was this world’s Dedede and Escargoon. They were just kind of standing there menacingly, a dark chuckle coming out of their mouths. I raised my eyebrow in confusion, wondering what they were doing – and then some purple-and-red brute stepped in front of them.

I blinked with a little bit of shock. “Wait, what?” I vocalized. Before me was definitely a Knuckle Joe – albeit with more anime-esque eyes and a color palette I hadn’t seen in decades. I hadn’t seen him around before, but based on context, he was the intruder Tiff and Tuff were talking about earlier.

“Alright, Kirby,” the Knuckle Joe said in a low voice, his eyes narrowed, “I’ve been looking for you, and now I’ve finally found ya.”

I kept blinking. This was the newest threat to Dream Land? I’ve knocked out several of these guys over the past twenty years with ease! Heck, one even became a Helper! “…okay. Sure,” I finally said after a bit of silence. “I can deal with this. So, you’re our newest visitor here?”

“What the—!” Knuckle Joe’s face immediately morphed into a look of shock. “Y-You mean… That’s Kirby?”

“That’s my name,” I responded, grinning. “It’s a timeless classic, don’t wear it out.” What? This ain’t a huge threat; I can afford to take things a little lightly now.

Behind me, I heard ‘Lil Kirbs jumping up and down, joyously shouting his own name repeatedly. “Kirby, Kirby~!”

“And there’s… two of them!?” Knuckle Joe gaped. His shrunken irises were funny to look at, I’ll admit.

After a bit, he went and composed himself. Oddly, he began to scratch the bottom of his nose. “Kirby. Uh, Kirbies. Do you know who I am?”

“You’re a Knuckle Joe,” I casually stated. “Who else would you be?” I would’ve shrugged my shoulders if I had any. (Behind me, I saw ‘Lil Kirbs imitate Joe by scratching his non-existent nose. “Poyo!”) “So, whatcha here for anyway? If it’s food, then you don’t need to worry. I know how to share some food with someone new!”

Knuckle Joe stumbled a bit, clearly taken aback by my hospitality. I don’t know why, I’m one of the friendliest guys in all of the Gamble Galaxy! I could hear him muttering something under his breath, though I couldn’t quite hear it from here.

Other Dedede and Escargoon quickly rushed up behind Knuckle Joe, the former expressing “C’mon, what are you waitin’ for, sonny boy? There he is! You wanted Kirby, right?”

“Hurry up, it’s past my bedtime,” Escargoon added. “Let’s get it on already!”

The purple Helper scoffed, saying “I’ll fight when I’m ready. I just gotta remember what he did to my father.”

“Your… father?” I found myself asking. This was new. Do Helpers have parents? The Joe from my world never mentioned anything about a family, if he even had one. “What about him? Is he paralyzed? Eaten by a demon? And what do I have to do with it?”

“You… You don’t even remember?” Knuckle Joe began to shake, his rage visibly beginning to build up. “That day, the most important day in my life… and you just treat it as if it were just another meal!?”

“Uh-oh,” Tuff whispered nearby to his sister, “I think he’s mad!”

“Not now, Tuff!” Tiff whispered back.

Finally, Joe declared, “That does it! Get ready to battle, Kirby! I don’t care if there’s two of you – I’ll beat you up all the same!” He crouched down and then proceeded to leap at all of us, yelling out a loud battle cry in the process.

I could practically see a splash screen show up just from his battle-ready pose.

The Wrathful Brawler
Knuckle Joe

“Kirby! Run!” Tiff’s voice insisted.

Instinct drove me (and ‘Lil Kirbs) to sidestep away as he slammed into the pile of food. (I sniffed a little. Don’t worry food; your sacrifice won’t be in vain!)

Right after, ‘Lil Kirbs made a run for it, and I followed suit. I can’t let him be hurt because of whatever the heck Joe wanted! “Hey, wait up for me, ‘Lil Kirbs!” I shouted as we began traversing the open rocky plain.

“Vulcan Jab! Vulcan Jab!” Knuckle Joe began to shoot a bunch of energy punches out of his fists in an attempt to target ‘Lil Kirbs—hey, wait a minute! That’s not how Vulcan Jab works! It doesn’t go that far!

It’s also not supposed to cause plumes of smoke to rise out of the floor, either. I think I’d know if half of my Copy Abilities had the properties of explosions. That’s only supposed to happen when I fuse them with the Fire element.

I hate it when enemies cheat like that.

‘Lil Kirbs was clearly panicking, ducking left and right to avoid the virtual missiles. I had to dodge too, seeing as I was directly behind him. Quickly, I reversed direction, crouched, and slid straight into Knuckle Joe’s feet. The fighter tripped as a result, jumping over me and face-planting onto the floor.

“Hey, it’s not fair to be picking on somebody far below your weight class!” I admonished him, poking him with my foot. “You should at least give him a Copy Ability first! Even the odds a bit!”

“I don’t care about evening the odds!” Joe jumped back up onto his feet. “I’m going to get my revenge, and nothing is going to stop me! Not even two of you! Smash Punch!” With that, Joe clenched his fist and shot forth a fairly large projectile at me. I sidestepped, letting the punch instead just drift off.

“Look, I don’t even know what you’re going on about!” I shouted, hopping and ducking under the various Fighter moves he was throwing at me. Vulcan Jabs, Smash Punches – this guy’s been training for quite a while! “Can’t we just sit down and talk this out!?”

“No way, Jose! Spin Kick!” With a stylish spin, Knuckle Joe dive-kicked right toward me, which actually managed to land its hit on me. “Oof!” I went flying a fair distance before landing back on my feet. I’ll admit, he knows how to hit hard. Maybe a little harder than I can hit with Fighter, actually!

A few more Vulcan Jabs were fired at me, and this time I decided to just inhale them. He fired so many, I could feel my cheeks practically bursting. “Huh? What are you doing?” he stated in confusion, right before I exhaled it back out as a large Star Bullet.

Grunting, Joe brought up his fists to guard and took the brunt of the Star Bullet’s force. “I don’t have time for this!” Suddenly, he rushed away from me. I followed my gaze and tried to guess his trajectory. Where is he even going?

It was only then that I remembered that ‘Lil Kirbs was running too.

Specifically, toward a cliff.

With a giant boulder conspicuously ready to fall from above.

“Aw, crud!” Quickly, I tried to get to ‘Lil Kirbs before Joe could. I snuck a look at Tiff and Tuff, and it turns out they were tied up by Other Dedede and Escargoon. Kawasaki got himself restrained, too. I’m, uh… not exactly surprised there, sadly.

Back on topic, I heard Knuckle Joe cry out a “Smash Punch!”, sending a jolt right at the boulder. It promptly toppled over, falling right into the path where ‘Lil Kirbs was running on. “P-Poyo!” he exclaimed, reversing course away from the boulder.

“Oh, that’s just great!” I cursed. What’s with this dude? He’s practically trying to kill him! I mean, that’s par for the course when it comes to villains on Dream Land, but still!

An idea then came to me. I puffed up and took to the skies (and from below, I could hear Other Dedede say “Hey! What’s that loony puffball doin’ now?”). Carefully, I lined up my position with the boulder, and proceeded to turn into a stone. (I knew learning this out of Smash would come in handy!)

Luckily, the momentum generated by my air height was enough to break the big boulder into pieces. Despite my form currently just being a slab of rock, I could still see ‘Lil Kirbs stop and sigh in relief… right before Knuckle Joe slammed into him and sent him bouncing across the ground.

I immediately transformed back to normal, and rushed to ‘Lil Kirbs right as Knuckle Joe started beating him around the bush – jumping on him, slamming him into a wall, you get the idea. “Hey! You don’t need to drag ‘Lil Kirbs into this!” I tried to appeal to him. “You just want a Kirby, right? Then come and get me!”

“You shouldn’t worry yer flubby little face!” I heard Dedede taunt from afar. “A Kirby’s a Kirby; it don’t matter which one he goes for!”

Escargoon chimed in, “Just let him do his thing so we can go get our beauty sleeps! My mother would spank me if she saw me out this late…”

Yeah, like I’ll let that happen. The former thing, I mean. The latter thing with Escargoon can happen, I won’t object. I ran straight for Knuckle Joe, ready to strike. Sure, I didn’t have any Copy Abilities ready, but I wasn’t gonna let that stop me!

“Don’t listen to ‘em, Kirby,” Tiff tried to encourage me. “Go save our Kirby!”

“Vulcan Jab! Vulcan Jab!” Joe sent a few more strikes at me, but I just slid under them and socked him in the jaw. I followed it up by jumping into the air and spinning my entire body to strike him repeatedly – a move I also learned from Smash Bros., by the way – before slamming my feet into his body to send him flying back.

Joe crashed into the floor, but easily transitioned into a roll back onto his feet. “Don’t interrupt me! Smash Punch!” Another barrage of punches came my way, which I responded to by sidestep spinning out of the way.

“Okay, no seriously, we can talk this out you know!” I tried one more time. “I get that you’re angry, but you don’t need to take it out on us! We still have snacks, if you want them, and—hey, where are you going!?” I stared in horror as Knuckle Joe decided to dash toward my younger counterpart – and I wouldn’t be fast enough to get to him. “Wait, stop!”

A stream of collective gasps filled the air, from ally and enemy alike (and one from my mouth, too)… and then, striking from the air, came this world’s Meta Knight, plunging his sword in front of Joe and forcing the latter to jump back. “It appears I have come just in time,” he remarked.

I breathed a sigh of relief. That’s one crisis averted, thankfully. “Gee, you couldn’t have timed that more perfectly,” I teased.

Coming down next to the caped crusader was my own Meta Knight, his wings flapping as he descended. “Even by air, we had to take quite a while,” he stated. “I may have wings, but I can only fly for so long before I have to rest.”

“It’s still pretty convenient, you have to admit, Meta,” I said, walking up to ‘Lil Kirbs to check up on his injuries. Luckily, it wasn’t anything bigger than a few bruises. “Still trying to get the whole ‘cool knight’ image in?”

Meta harrumphed at my dialogue. “It’s not just an image, it’s a way of life.”

“That’s not really helping your case, you know.”

Other Dedede came rushing in, his arms flailing in the air. “Hey, holllllld it!” he hollered, directing his attention at the two Metas. “What’re you two doin’ here?”

Escargoon was right beside his liege as usual. “You need to mind your own business, Meta Knight—err, Meta Knights!” he ineffectually scolded.

Tiff and Tuff dashed on right by them, briefly shocking them into looking behind them. Huh, there’s Sword and Blade Knight, untying Kawasaki. Heh, go Helpers! “Meta Knight! You made it!” Tiff said. “Thank goodness!”

“I am glad to have arrived to defuse this situation,” Mexican Meta said. “But I am wondering where our other Majesty is. He was supposed to be searching alongside us…”

“H-Hey! K-Kirby! ‘Lil Kirbs!” Oh, and there’s the Dedede I know (plus Bandana Dee), coming over the horizon. Something told me he had been searching around for quite a while, judging by his panting visage and the sweat piled on both him and Dee. “W-We saw the intruder coming over here! You gotta get ‘Lil Kirbs out now, before—!”

Dedede and Dee proceeded to stop in place and stare at Knuckle Joe, who was staring back with a rather deadpan expression on his face. “…oh. We, uh… come at a bad time…?” he panted. “Ohh…” The two of them collapsed onto their backs. “I feel… so tired… Ugh…”

“I told you… we should’ve… used the hot-air balloon… Great King…!” Dee wheezed. “Even… all the other Waddle Dees… are tuckered out…!”

Meta Knight sighed. “Of course Dedede would make his task artificially harder on himself.”

I chuckled. “You know some things will just never change, Meta.”

“Indeed.” Mexican Meta turned to Knuckle Joe, who only glared at the intervention he had made earlier. “There is no reason for you to be battling with the Kirbies, my friend.” Joe merely raised an eyebrow. “For the one you seek… is me!”

“Who are you? And why is there two of you, like tubby and Kirby?” Joe asked.

“That is a long story that we will get into another time. I am Meta Knight,” he introduced himself, “and I am the Star Warrior who struck down your father!” …wait, that’s what this is about!? S-Seriously!?

How the heck do you think ‘Lil Kirbs could even remotely be capable of that!? That’s like saying candy and vegetables go together! (They don’t, by the way.)

I found myself gaping, as was Tiff, Tuff, and even Other Dedede and Escargoon! (Dedede and Dee, meanwhile, were too tired to even muster some sort of audible response.) Beyond the people of my birth planet, I’ve never had much in the way of a father figure throughout the numerous years of my life. But I still can’t imagine what it must’ve been like for Knuckle Joe to grow up without a father.

And this world’s Meta Knight was the one who struck him down?

There’s certainly some kind of story behind this.

Knuckle Joe, in response, shot a fist toward the still knight – yet he stopped right before he made contact. (I’m pretty confident that Mexican Meta could’ve deflected it if necessary.) He stepped back. “Prove it to me,” he said.

Meta looked at his counterpart. “…you don’t have to, if you don’t want to,” he said. Aw, look at him, showing some compassion.

Mexican Meta shook his head. “As painful as it is… it is necessary.” Oh boy, here comes the exposition. “Your father, Jecra, and I were elite Star Warriors in the Galaxy Soldier Army,” Mexican Meta began. “He was strong, brave… a good man. Many soldiers worked hard to become like him. We shared many hard times and many happy times. I was proud to have him as my best friend.” His voice was wistful and reminiscing – something I recognized as being in my voice at times.

“But one night… we let our guards down, and a band of Nightmare’s monsters ambushed us.” There’s the use of Nightmare again. And from the looks of it, Dedede recognizes the term too, seeing as how he jumped up when Mexican Meta said it. I hope he was listening the whole time; I don’t want to repeat things to him. “We lost many good soldiers that night, including… your father.”

He continued, “I was sure he was gone forever, but the monsters brought him straight… to Nightmare.” He sounded pained now, but he was trying his best to hide it. “I had been overjoyed when I saw him returning to us one sunset… but my joy soon transformed into horror. Nightmare had changed him. He was now on the side… of the demon beasts!”

“You’re a liar!” Knuckle Joe interjected. “I’ll never believe that my father could ever be a monster!”

…I could understand his denial. I wasn’t immediately accepting myself of the revelations us Star Allies saw during our last adventure. I remember how I was born and I still struggled to accept it all.

Mexican Meta held his sword – Galaxia, my Meta called his – in front of him. “I know it is a painful story, but I swear by my sword that what I tell you is true.” He grabbed something from his hammerspace – a locket, of sorts – and handed it to Knuckle Joe. “Perhaps this will convince you.”

Joe took the locket, and opened it up. I couldn’t see what was inside from my current position, but whatever it was made Joe gasp.

…it must’ve been a picture of Knuckle Joe himself. What else could it be?

“Jecra gave it to me,” Mexican Meta continued explaining. “At the end, something stopped him from fully surrendering himself to Nightmare. It was the love he had for you.”

I felt tears well up in my eyes from Mexican Meta’s story. Nightmare’s… really caused some hardship in this world, huh?

I can’t wait for the day when it’s time to challenge him, wherever he is.

“So he was a good guy!” Tuff said. Yeah, uh… nice reiterating there, buddy.

“He must’ve had a lot of love for you, Knuckle Joe, if he was able to resist becoming a monster like that,” Tiff said. “You should be proud of him.”

“Heh… heh…” Dedede’s panting seemed to be easing up. “Man, he sounds like a guy… I would’ve loved to meet. Maybe even spar with.” He got up. “’Wish I had a dad as cool as him.”

Knuckle Joe just stared at the locket for a while, something unreadable bouncing in his eyes. He closed it, and suddenly just began sinisterly laughing.

I blinked. “Huh?” What was up with him now?

His face turned angry, and he tossed the locket onto the floor. “He—He wasn’t my father!” he shouted. He’s in full denial mode now. “He was—he was just a weakling, turning into a monster like that! Just up and leaving me alone like that… I’ll never forgive him for that!” Something tells me his life before now wasn’t quite a happy one – but that’s still no excuse for what he’s saying.

“In that case,” Mexican Meta said coldly, “I am glad Jecra is gone. That way, he doesn’t have to see the monster that you have become.” Ouch, what a burn.

“What!? What are you talking about!? I ain’t no monster!”

“Anyone who abandons reason and lives purely on hatred,” Mexican Meta replied, “is a monster! You are walking down the path that Nightmare loves to watch.”

“You shouldn’t be so quick to deny it, either,” I chimed in, my eyes turning as hard as Meta’s counterpart. “What, you think your actions against ‘Lil Kirbs are the actions of a good guy? You’re practically a demon beast yourself!” All of us looked back at ‘Lil Kirbs, who was still knocked out. Even Other Dedede looked concerned for him (but I’m sure if I brought it up, he’d deny it to his dying day).

“You’re wrong! I’m no monster!” Knuckle Joe got his fists back into a fighting stance. “If you think that, you’re going to have to prove it!”

“Then I’ll prove it.” I stepped forth. “We’ll have a duel, right here, right now. No Meta Knight, no ‘Lil Kirbs, no Dedede. Just you and me.”

“Wait up!” Dedede said. “A-Are you sure about that, Kirby? I mean, this guy kicked ‘Lil Kirbs’ butt! Are you really—“

“Fine!” Knuckle Joe interrupted. It seems he’s accepting my challenge. “If that’s how you want to play, then let’s go!”

VS. Knuckle Joe

Knuckle Joe has trained himself for the day he would encounter the one who struck down his father. His punches are strong and strike true, but the amount of rage he holds may be detrimental to his cause.

The sun was rising on this climatic battle. I can’t believe we’ve all stayed up this late, but I suppose it couldn’t be helped. My Ability-less self and Knuckle Joe, standing apart from each other, with quite the audience watching – ‘Lil Kirbs, Meta Knight, Mexican Meta, Tiff, Tuff, Dedede, Other Dedede, Bandana Dee, and Escargoon. (Kawasaki had left earlier, saying that “It’s a work day, I gotta get my beauty sleep!” Escargoon was clearly disgruntled at him for being able to use that excuse.)

“Oh boy,” Dedede said, elbowing his counterpart with a grin on his face, “this is going to be pretty exciting. Who’re you rooting for? My vote’s on Kirby.”

Other Dedede scoffed. “You’re rootin’ wrong, then! Knuckle Joe will knock dat Kirby right outta the park, just wait and see!”

“Wanna bet money on it?” Dedede’s grin was practically digging into his cheeks at this point.

“Heh heh heh heh! It’s on, fatty!”

“Big talk, coming from the guy who has more weight than me!”

Escargoon looked exhausted at the two Dededes’ rivalry. And it’s only been a few weeks since we arrived, too. Either that, or he’s just exhausted at the day in general. “I can’t wait for the day to be over. Dealing with His Majesty this late is just exhausting. What do you think, Waddle Dee?”

Bandana Dee seemed nonplussed. “Hey, so long as Kirby comes out on top, I don’t mind! Great King and I have faith in him!”

“That’s… not what I was talking about, little guy. Ugh…” Escargoon put a palm to his head and shook his head in annoyance. “I should’ve just brought my lucky pillow…”

Tiff was cradling ‘Lil Kirbs in her arms. I can tell she’d make a great mother someday. “Hey, other Meta Knight,” she started conversation to my Meta, “do you think Kirby will win out there?”

“I am confident in his victory. He will show Knuckle Joe the error of his ways. That is just how he is.”

“…I hope you’re right…”

“Hey, don’t worry so much, Tiff!” Tuff said. “Kirby will show ‘em who’s boss! You go, Kirby!”

Aloud so Knuckle Joe could hear, Mexican Meta stated, “Kirby is a powerful defender of his world, much like the Star Warriors of yore. He has faced many types of demons before in his journeys. If you battle him, then what you are… will soon become clear!”

You know… As much as I really want to teach Knuckle Joe a lesson for bruising ‘Lil Kirbs that hard, there’s something else that tugs at my heartstrings. It doesn’t take me a genius to figure out that Knuckle Joe’s been wanting this for a long time. I can imagine what it must’ve been like, being all alone with no one to guide you – except he didn’t experience the love and care I had before I set off on my journeys.

It was just him and his rage for presumably the longest time.

…I can’t let him simmer in his hatred like that. I’ve redeemed plenty of villains before, some of whom were far worse. Marx, Magolor, Taranza… All three of them had a glimmer of goodness inside them – no matter how small it might be in some cases (talking about you, Marx). I can see that same glimmer in Knuckle Joe right now.

And if taking him down will allow that glimmer to rise to the surface, then I’ll do it.

As the leader of the Star Allies… I’ll save Knuckle Joe, whether he wants it or not!

Knuckle Joe scratched his non-existent nose again in preparation. Feeling sassy, I decided to repeat the action right in front of him, making sure to smirk while doing so.

I can practically hear Master Hand’s voice kickstarting the battle in my mind, right about now.

3… 2… 1… GO!

Joe lifted his fist and performed a series of Vulcan Jabs to start the fight. I sidestepped out of the way and ran up to Joe in response. “Seriously, more Vulcan Jabs?” I sniped. “You need to vary up your material, dude.” I twirled my feet and kicked him into the air, following up with a Final Cutter to deal some more damage. “I’ve got several lessons to give you, if you need it!”

“Don’t mock me! Down Kick!” From the air, Knuckle Joe performed a Falcon Kick-esque attack, slamming into my cheek. T-That smarts…! “Spin Kick!” Another roundhouse came at me, and I instinctively went into a Guarding stance. As soon as he fired another Smash Punch at me, I opened my mouth and inhaled the energy blasts whole.

Mmm, tastes like tangerine, I thought. It’s a rather strange thought to have – and a rather strange taste at that – but hey, I’m a weird guy in general. It’s nothing too unnatural at this stage of the game.

The minute I let the blasts enter the black hole that was my stomach, I felt a surge of power go through me. A little red-and-pink band tied itself around my forehead, a star symbol most prominently in the middle. I pumped my fist up at the feeling. “Oh yeah, it’s Fighter time!” I exclaimed.

(“Whoa!” I overheard Tuff gape. “Look at Kirby’s new ability! We haven’t seen that yet!”

“That is Fighter Kirby,” Mexican Meta clarified for him.

“Poyo… poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs cheered from Tiff’s arms. Aw, he wants to get in on the action, too! Maybe after this is done, I’ll find a boxing glove or something and let him try the ability for himself.)

“Hmph. So you’re gonna imitate me now, huh?” Knuckle Joe said. “Don’t think just because you’ve got a headband means you’re gonna win this fight!”

“I know that already,” I replied, once more ‘scratching’ my nose. “The question is, do you think you can win just because you feel like you’re stronger?”

“Grrrr…! I’ll show you! Vulcan Jab! Vulcan Jab!” Once more, Knuckle Joe fired those rapid-fire projectiles (does he use anything else on such a regular basis?), but I just countered with my own variant on the Vulcan Jab – my ‘neutral A’, if you get my meaning. The blasts dissipated within seconds, freeing me to attack with my own Fighter moveset.

I dashed ahead and struck with a Somersault Kick, my momentum sending me right at Knuckle Joe. In response, he kicked upward and deflected my attack, and I promptly retaliated with a Down Kick much like his own. We continued like this for a while – we would find some way to counter each other’s attacks and strike back with our own, basically being pretty evenly matched despite my loads more experience.

(“Sire, I don’t think either one of them can win like this!” Escargoon noted.

“I just hope Kirby loses,” Other Dedede lamented.)

“Ooh, ooh! Kirby!” Dedede jumped up and down with a suggestion, cupping his hands near his mouth so I could properly hear him. “Don’t forget to do the Hadouken! You can’t miss this chance!”

(“Hadouken?” Tuff whispered to himself. “What’s that?”

“Oh, it’s a really cool thing!” Bandana Dee stated. “Just watch!”)

Hey, that’s right! I haven’t had a chance to try that out in a while. I put my hands together and began forming a ball of energy in them, letting it charge for a good while. Knuckle Joe was confused by my actions. “Hey, why are you just standing there!?” he shouted in utter confusion. “Fight me or get lost!”

I smirked. “Hadouken!” I proclaimed, letting the Giga Force Blast fly right at him, hitting him right in the torso. Ha, doing and yelling that is always so much fun – especially with the sounds of awe coming from our audience. Heck, even Ryu was impressed when I performed it in front of him (which is one of the greatest compliments, like, ever).

“You ready to give up now?” I taunted, boxing my fists into the air in what was hopefully a cool-looking action. “There’s still a chance; I won’t hold it against you if you accept!”

“No! I won’t!” Joe growled, standing back up despite the hit he just tanked. He was looking a little bruised now, but he was still going strong. I admire a guy with that type of determination. “I haven’t come all this way just to be defeated by a puffy beach ball!” Hey, I resemble that remark! “Whatever it takes, I will destroy you!”

Okay, I can practically feel the rage and hatred rapidly growing within him. That’s… That’s not good. Like, at all. (That’s the type of stuff that turns you into a…!) “Uhh… You okay? Like, really, really okay?” I asked him, nervousness creeping into my voice. “We can stop, I’m serious!”

“NEVER!” Joe came at me with a renewed sense of determination, and his attacks were more aggressive than they had been just a few short minutes ago. His punches and kicks were coming in at a rapid pace! “Jeez, dude! You need to calm down!” I pleaded. “All this rage inside you, it’s not good for your health!”

“I… DON’T… CARE!” he screamed in-between punches (he’s sounding really adolescent right now). “I’ll prove to you… that I’m not… the monster… you think I am!”

Suddenly, a white glow began to emanate from Joe’s body, purple lightning crackling all around him as the light completely engulfed him. That… really wasn’t good. I jumped back on impulse as the light died down to reveal what can only be best described as Knuckle Joe’s Pinch Phase: …a giant purple ball with spiked hands and a helmet of needles.

…okay, how do you even get that? Knuckle Joe’s a Fighter, not a Needle person! How can Needle possibly be the next logical step?

Whatever the case may be, there’s no denying what’s already happened: the hatred within Knuckle Joe is starting to consume him whole. And we better get to rectifying that!

“Meta! Dedede! Dee! Over here!” I called out to my three companions. They knew what to do, and without any hesitation, they leaped into the fray with their weapons in hand.

“Well, this escalated pretty fast!” Dedede commented, clutching his hammer tightly. “Can’t say I didn’t expect something like this to happen!”

“Hey hey hey!” Other Dedede exclaimed in surprise. “What do you think you’re doin’!? What’s goin’ on here!?”

“Yeah, you better tell us what’s happening or His Majesty will give you a walloping!” Escargoon tried to threaten us (not like it’d work, of course).

“Poyo? Poyo!?” ‘Lil Kirbs looked distressed at what was happening.

“Knuckle Joe is on the verge of turning into a true demon beast,” Mexican Meta explained. “If he is not brought to his senses soon, there may be no turning back!”

“No way…!” Tiff breathed. “He’ll become a monster?”

“Then we best ensure that does not come to pass,” Meta stated. “We have come too far to let a Soul Boss just happen right in front of us.” (“Soul Boss?” I could hear Tuff question.) “Come, Kirby. Let us prevent this possible tragedy from occurring!”

“You got it, Meta. Star Allies, let’s go!” Together, the four of us went into combat against the newly empowered Knuckle Joe (more like Needle Joe at this point), just as we had against many bosses before. Fists, sword, hammer, and spear struck at the big guy in coordination, making him steadily more frustrated.

“Hey! What are you doing!?” he demanded to know, temporarily floating just out of our reach. Oh great, even his voice is getting distorted now! “This is my fight, not yours!”

“That doesn’t matter!” Bandana Dee said, his worries tinging throughout his voice. “You need to take a look at yourself! You’re—you’re not yourself anymore! You look just like a monster!”

“What are you talking about!? I’m still myself! I’m not a monster! I’ll show you! I’ll show you all!”  Joe aimed his helmet at the four of us and shot several needles from it. We naturally jumped out of the way, the needles ineffectually digging themselves into the ground where we just stood.

“Jeez, kid! You’re letting your emotions run you over!” Dedede noted aloud as he swung his hammer at Joe. “You need to calm down, seriously!” Joe took the hit, stumbling and striking back with a punch.

Meta blocked it with his sword and continued where Dedede left off. “Indeed. This type of rage serves nothing more than to destroy you from the inside out. You must resist the call!”

In anger, Knuckle Joe slammed his knuckled fists into the ground, creating a shockwave of stone pillars that temporarily prevented us from retaliating. “You’re just spouting jibberish!” he denied. “I’ll destroy you all and prove I’m not a monster!”

“Oh come on, you’re contradicting yourself with every word!” I shouted back. “If you’re not gonna do things the easy way, then we’ll do it the hard way!” As Joe launched more of his needle missiles, I discarded the Fighter ability and opened my mouth.

The needles tumbled one by one into my mouth, and the minute I swallowed, another wave of power went through me. I felt a helmet – a red one, at that – fall onto my head, a layer of sharp spikes all around it just like Joe’s helmet. “Talk about a taste of irony,” I supplied more sass. “We kinda look alike now, what with this helmet.”

(“Whoa, now what ability is that!?” Tuff asked Mexican Meta.

“That is Needle Kirby,” he replied. “Now Joe will see the monster he has become!”)

“Perfect. It will show Joe exactly the type of monster he has become,” Meta Knight clinically stated – same exact words as his counterpart, who could’ve guessed? Similar minds think alike. “And from there, we can bring him back to his senses.” He nodded at me with confidence, and I knew what to do from there.

After all, I never gave up that one Jamba Shard.

I rolled up into a spiky ball, much like how Sonic does, and dashed right at Knuckle Joe’s form. I slammed into him, sending him back, and the rest of the Star Allies followed up with their own attacks. Dedede did a Hammer Flip, Meta Knight slashed Joe repeatedly (how creative), and Bandana Dee performed his Spear Copter. Finally, Joe tuckered out enough for me to get a move in.

I aimed my helmet at Joe and did a Needle Burst, imitating the move that Joe had done earlier. He gasped at my actions, bringing up an arm to block the needle missiles I sent his way. “W-Wha!? That’s impossible!” he exclaimed. “H-How are you doing that!?”

“Surprised?” I said, momentarily stopping my assault. “I can do this because I can copy the abilities of others. And right now, the ability I have directly mirrors your own.” A glare crossed my face. “Don’t you get it? This is what you’ve become: a shadow of your former self!”

“You’re—You’re lying! I-I can’t be a monster! I… I don’t want to be!”

For a brief moment, my face turned sympathetic. “…well, you’re not a real monster. Not yet.” And then it was back to being determined. I hoisted both my arms up, letting a familiar pink heart materialize in my hands. “And you won’t have to be.”

Putting as much positivity into it as I could, I tossed the Friend Heart at Knuckle Joe, and it collided without any resistance. A pink light exploded from him, forcing all of us to shield our eyes. “Jeez, it’s not supposed to be that strong now!” Dedede remarked.

When the light died down, Knuckle Joe had returned back to his normal form – except his color palette was now that of the familiar yellow-haired, tan-skinned Helper I had known for so long. (“Hey, he looks normal now!” Dee commented at the sight. Yeah, about time, too.) He dropped to the floor on his back, finally defeated.

“Phew… We made it!” Dedede sighed, letting his hammer drop to the floor. “Man, today has been far too exciting! I’m gonna need a late-night dessert for this!”

“But Great King, it’s morning now!” Dee pointed out.

“Wait wait wait, it’s what now!?” Dedede jolted his head toward the rising sun, and all I could think was How the heck did you not notice that before!? You could see it right from the audience! Where you were standing earlier!

Mexican Meta approached the barely-conscious Joe, looking far more relieved for him than he had been earlier. I guess that despite all that Joe had said and done, he was still the son of his friend. “Joe…” he said quietly.

“I… I told you, Meta Knight…” Joe breathed, sounding like he was more at peace than he had ever been before. “I’m… I’m not a monster…”

“I know, Joe,” other Meta assured him. “I know.”

“Kirby!” Tiff, Tuff, and ‘Lil Kirbs came running to us, their faces similarly showing signs of relief.

“Man, you were all cool out there!” Tuff told me. “You kicked Joe’s butt, and then you and the other Meta Knight and Dedede just jumped in and kicked it even more! It was just… so awesome!”

This kid’s vocabulary needs some expanding, but I can appreciate a good compliment when I see it. “Heh, all in a day’s work, right?” I said, a smile on my lips.

“Poyo! Poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs cheered, playfully punching the air in a clear attempt to imitate my fighting skills.

“You were pretty coordinated with your friends there,” Tiff noticed, “not to mention the pink heart. What was that? And why did it make Knuckle Joe look… different?”

“It lets me make bad guys into good guys,” I gave a short explanation with a straight face. “I learned it just a few months ago. As for why Knuckle Joe looks different…” I shrugged. “Who knows?”

“Well, at least the crisis is over. I’m glad we didn’t have to face off against any demon beast this time, too.” To Tuff and ‘Lil Kirbs, she said, “Let’s head home, guys. It’s way past our bedtime anyway.”

“Oh crud, you’re right!” Tuff panicked. “Oh man, mom and dad are gonna kill us!”

“You guys go on ahead,” I suggested. “Us Star Allies need to take care of Knuckle Joe first.”

(In the distance, I could hear Other Dedede state, “Hmph! This match wasn’t all it was cooked up to be! C’mon, Escargoon! I’m sleepin’ the day off!”

“Finally! I’m gonna sleep in today…” Escargoon breathed, walking alongside his liege back to the castle. I should probably remind this Dedede that he now owes my Dedede a few bucks – but eh, I’ll save that for later.)

Tiff nodded. “You do that. See you later!” The three kids began walking off too, leaving just me, the other Star Allies, Mexican Meta, and Knuckle Joe standing on the plains.

I glanced another look at Knuckle Joe’s unconscious body, who was now being held up by Sword and Blade Knight. “This whole crisis has gotten me pretty worried,” I admitted to my friends. “That transformation… It was pretty close to the process of Soulification.”

“But it shouldn’t have been possible, right?” Dee said, looking like he wanted to believe his guesses were wrong. “I mean, that’s only supposed to happen with the baddest of the bad guys! How could it have been so easy for Knuckle Joe to become a monster like that?”

“Unfortunately, we don’t have enough answers,” Meta said. “We have taken for granted how similar our two Dream Lands are, to the point where we have neglected to notice any of the differences. Tomorrow, I suggest we head to my counterpart and figure out what other pieces of information we are missing.”

Dedede nodded. “Yeah. As the King of Dream Land, there’s no way I can just let something so similar to Soulification pass me by and not doing anything about it. Alright, enough about that.” Dedede turned his attention to the other knights. “Hey, you guys! How about we bring Joe over to my place? I’ve got a spare bedroom he can borrow!”

“That would be most excellent,” Mexican Meta said. “Come, Sword, Blade. Let us depart for the nearby Castle Dedede.”

“Right, sir!” The three of them marched off in the direction of Dedede’s place, Knuckle Joe in tow. Us Star Allies soon began to follow them.

“How ‘bout we have a sleepover tonight?” Dedede suggested as we made our way. “It’ll be the perfect way to end off this crazy day, what do you guys think?”

“Heck yeah!” I responded joyously. “You can count me in!”

“You always have the best ideas, Great King!” Dee commented too.

The three of us expectantly looked at Meta Knight, who could only groan in what could best be described as ‘long-term suffering’. “I suppose it will not be too detrimental to my schedule…”

“Woohoo!” the three of us cried.

Chapter Text

[King Dedede (Canon)]

Castle Dedede (Canon) – Throne Room

Hoo-wee, yesterday sure was the most chaotic day we’ve had in a while.

Sure, us Star Allies are no stranger to all sorts of weird and colorful adventures. Kirby’s seen the brunt’s share of ‘em, too. But it’s been a long time since I’ve had to run around so much – and you better believe we gorged ourselves on ice cream that night. Meta Knight will never admit it, but I know he enjoyed our little sleepover – and all the ice cream, too.

We got Knuckle Joe over to a spare bedroom of mine, too. (He may be strong, but lots of Waddle Dees can still pick him up with ease.) He looks a lot better when he isn’t using weird enemy palette colors. And his face was pretty ‘at peace’ too – which is great, considering he just underwent the closest thing to Soulification I’ve ever seen.

Of course, now that the sleepover’s… well, over, we’ve got a lot of important topics to discuss. A king needs to be able to separate playfulness with seriousness – and as the King of Dream Land, I know how to do that pretty well, especially following the Robobot crisis. And now, I, the Star Allies, and that weird Mexican Meta Knight (Kirby calls him ‘Mexican Meta’; I’ve adopted that too) are gathering about in my throne room to talk.

For the occasion, I got one of those big tables you have dinner parties at. Okay, maybe it’s not that big – I managed to find one that’s a five-person-seater instead – but you get my point.

“Sooooooooo,” I drawled, the four of us core Star Allies staring directly into Mexican Meta’s eyes, “what’s the whole dealio with this world and whatever evil’s plaguing it? I’m-a thinking we’ll need to know so we don’t get caught off guard like that again.” To be honest, we really should’ve done this before, but like Meta said, we got complacent with the novelty of another Dream Land.

“Yeah!” my loyal Dee chimed in. “I mean, Knuckle Joe almost got turned into a Soul Boss yesterday! That’s not supposed to happen, ever!” A Soul Boss is a serious thing. Even Dee and I know that, and we haven’t seen as many Soul Bosses as Kirby has. (The dude’s seen six, that’s seriously a lot!) The two we’ve seen together, however – namely Magolor, Void Termina – have gotten the point across to us. Though if I’m being honest, I would’ve liked to stay oblivious about it. It’s not a very pretty subject to think about.

“Yes, I suppose I do owe you all a worthy explanation,” Mexican Meta conceded. Hmm, it looks like he knows when to back down to a worthy king. Now that’s a trait I like to see in a knight!

Meta Knight looked like he was in deep thought. “You have told me a little bit about the galactic crisis before,” he remembered (Huh, really? That must’ve been while I was busy). “I do not believe too many details were given at the time, beyond the fact that it is a major threat you’ve been fighting for a long while now.”

“Allow me to start elaborating, then. Long ago, in the far reaches of the Gamble Galaxy, a powerful and cunning sorcerer rose to power. The concept of benevolence was unknown to him. He wanted nothing more than to provide untold amounts of suffering and to conquer the entire universe. His name… is Nightmare.”

Immediately, I felt my eyes widen and my jaw drop. I’ve heard that name before. “N-N-N-Nightmare!?” I gawked at Mexican Meta, who appeared not to care that he just dropped a giant bombshell. Dee instinctively shuddered at the name – I admit, it’s not a very nice name to be born with.

And… Kirby and Meta didn’t actually look too surprised at the whole thing, either. “Wait, you two already knew!?” I started gaping at them.

“Like I said, he told me a little about it before,” Meta clinically stated.

“Sorry, Dedede!” On the other hand, Kirby was looking rather sheepish. (At least he has the decency to.) “I meant to talk to you about it, but then I… got kind of distracted. Like, a lot.” I mentally sighed. That’s Kirby for you. Saves Pop Star on an annual basis and is just as lazy as I am.

“Well, what’s done is done,” I said, closing my eyes and thinking. “…I didn’t think we’d see him again after all this time.”

“You have seen Nightmare before?” Mexican Meta asked, bewildered. “I had known you four had faced multiple threats in the past. Even your battle stances speak of much experience. But to have already encountered the galaxy’s greatest threat… it seems preposterous.”

“It happened over twenty years ago,” I started offering as an explanation. Hoo boy, this takes me back. “This Nightmare fellow was trying to… take over Dream Land or something, I didn’t exactly catch his plan – and he wanted to do it through the Fountain of Dreams.”

“Fountain of Dreams?” Mexican Meta recited. I could hear curiosity tinging in his voice. “That is a device I have never heard of before.”

“You guys don’t have it!?” Dee spoke up. He was waving his hands in the air wildly now (he looks so cute while doing so). “B-But, it’s the Fountain of Dreams! It’s the source of all dreams! You can’t dream without it! H-How do you even sleep here!?”

“The source of all dreams?” And now Mexican Meta was just flabbergasted. “That’s… That’s something we definitely don’t have.” I didn’t blame him for his surprise; the Fountain of Dream is a luxury that most other planets don’t have anything remotely similar to – and that’s not even accounting for the Star Rod. Admittedly, we all take it for granted that the both of them filter out all the nightmares we could ever have.

Meta Knight snapped his… fingers? It—It sounded like a snap, but last I checked he doesn’t have any fingers at all…

Anyway, he snapped his fingers in realization. “That’s right,” he finally recalled. “There was a crisis involving the Fountain of Dreams long ago. You stated there was something trying to attack the Fountain of Dreams, so you split the Star Rod in order to thwart his scheme.”

Kirby then deadpanned, “And then you took a swimmy-swim in the Fountain for the lulz. Like seriously, what the heck? You had to have realized it looked really suspicious.”

“…in my defense, I was still kind of juvenile then…” Okay, okay, maybe that wasn’t my brightest idea. Certainly gave Kirby the wrong impression (and boy, didn’t I used to do that a lot back in the day), and… kinda almost screwed us over (whoops). Luckily it all worked out, though it did teach me to be a little less conspicuous.

…well, it was part of what taught me. You just need to lump it in with twenty-plus years of Character Development, too.

“I am not surprised to hear such an event would happen in your Dream Land,” Mexican Meta said to us. Gee, how polite. “I am certain our Dedede would bathe in this… fountain had he the chance to. As he likes to put it, ‘anything in Dream Land belongs to him only.’ It is just in his nature.”

And now I have terrible images of my counterpart in swimming gear, trying to gracefully float in the Fountain of Dreams and failing horribly. Oh god, he’s so fat and weirdly anime it’s just… barf-worthy.

“I’m pretty sure he’d sink first and Escargoon would have to pull him out,” Kirby commented with a smirk. There goes his sass, flaring up again. “And all the Waddle Dees, too.”

“Anyway,” I steered things back on topic, “it worked for a while – until I forgot to inform Kirby about everything – and we managed to weaken Nightmare since he had to stay in the depowered Fountain of Dreams for an extended period of time. From there, Kirby managed to defeat him with the restored Star Rod, and the crisis was kind of over after that.”

“I blew up the moon, too!” Kirby proudly proclaimed with a wide smile on his face. “And it was awesome.” It says something about our world when our moon is blown up not by a villain (like Sonic’s) or some mysterious cataclysm (like Mario’s), but the protagonist himself.

To be fair, it is a feat worth talking about – though definitely not quite on par with some of Kirby’s other accomplishments. You know, Kirby’s probably the only guy I know who could say ‘I blew up my moon and it’s one of my tamer feats’ with a straight face.

“Oh, so that’s why there’s a giant hole in the moon!” Dee said out loud, a light bulb clearly going off in his head. “I just thought a meteor hit it or something!”

“…your world is certainly very different from ours,” Mexican Meta noted, carefully avoiding the subject of our moon, “in many more ways than just one. To think that you have seen Nightmare before… it is almost unthinkable.”

“Why’s Nightmare so bad here then, anyway?” I proceeded to ask. “I mean, he wasn’t much of a threat back home.”

“When Nightmare first began making waves, he showcased a level of skill and cunning that was unlike any other conqueror in existence. He was able to create legions of demon beasts to do his bidding, and became a force of nature unrivaled by anyone. Unrivaled… until the Galaxy Soldier Army was formed.”

We all blinked. “An army?” Kirby repeated. “I didn’t think the threat was that severe. Not even the bad guys back home need that much firepower.”

“We were OP already,” I commented. “We didn’t exactly need it.”

Mexican Meta continued, “The GSA was formed of those willing to fight for the freedom of all in the Galaxy. Our most elite soldiers were those considered Star Warriors – those with tremendous skill and prestige who could take on many monsters at once. We fought several of Nightmare’s greatest demon beasts together – even though I ended up being targeted specifically the most. I still remember the battles – Kracko, Blocky, Buggzy… in fact, many of our fights were against those that our Kirby has faced.”

“…that can’t be a coincidence,” I stated now. “We have those ‘monsters’ in our world, too. These similarities are getting too weird for my tastes.” I’ve asked Kracko to guard things before in the past – be it Sparkling Star or Star Rod Piece. He’s abrasive, though, and as Kirby likes to put it, he couldn’t hit a ‘barn-sized lightning rod’ if he tried.

“Yeah! Heck, we’ve faced Kracko so many times, it’s practically routine at this point!” Kirby chimed in.

“B-But how c-can that be!?” Dee stammered. He looked pretty confused – which isn’t too far from how the rest of us are feeling. “I-It’s like he remembers us!”

“Unfortunately for the GSA, Nightmare’s monsters outnumbered and overwhelmed us, to the point where I was the last Star Warrior remaining. Battered, defeated, but still alive, I made my way across the galaxy… confident that a new hope would one day rise to finally put an end to Nightmare’s menace.” (Ooh, Star Wars references! I thought.) “That is why I came to Pop Star, so I could serve under this world’s King Dedede.”

“Why would you want to work for this world’s Dedede?” Kirby asked quizzically. “He’s a nightmare himself! N-No offense intended of course, Dedede.”

“None taken.” I think he’s still sore over the beating I gave him our first meeting, actually.

“The starships of Star Warriors are designed to fly them to planets with a strong demon beast influence. This world’s Dedede enjoys the presence of monsters, and has connected to Nightmare Enterprises to see his desires come true. I know for a fact that the company specifically came up to him to start their services.” Nightmare Enterprises, huh? Sounds like a company basically built out of monsters.

Yeah, this definitely ain’t a coincidence. Something’s going on behind the scenes here. “N-Nightmare Enterprises wanted with Other King?” Dee said nervously. “A-And you said he l-liked t-targeting you, too! I-If we put all these f-facts together, t-that would mean…!”

“…that this Nightmare may be the one from ours, reborn into this one,” Meta Knight finished, his voice taking on that serious tone that I’ve almost always heard him use. “That would explain why he would target my counterpart, why he has recreated so many of our past foes, and why he was attracted to this world’s Dedede.” To his counterpart, he asked, “You said that he was a sorcerer, yes?”

“That is correct. Many of our soldiers were inconvenienced by his dark magic affecting the enemy side.”

“Then that would explain the minor Soulification process yesterday. Nightmare’s presence, combined with the lack of a Fountain of Dreams, has tainted the atmosphere – and under this conditions, it is not too surprising that a Soul Boss could be created.”

“…Soulification?” Mexican Meta seemed confused by the term we just threw around. “What is that? And what does that have to do with Knuckle Joe?” Well, he’s smart enough to figure out that, at least.

“Soulification is the process of creating the darkest of demons,” Kirby began to explain, his face utterly serious. Having faced the most Soul Bosses, he’s the most qualified out of all of us to explain the subject. “It’s what happens when you sustain yourself on hatred and sheer determination to live, usually combined with the usage of some sort of powerful catalyst. They can become the most powerful villainous forces around, through just their sheer power alone – and that’s what makes them so dangerous. Six of them have rose back home – but luckily, none of them have lasted long enough to do any long-term damage to the galaxy.”

“That… That is certainly worrying,” Mexican Meta stated, his eyes wide. “It sounds very similar to the incident with Knuckle Joe just the previous day. But I do not recall any sort of ‘catalyst’ being involved in his transformation then.”

“Catalysts are almost always involved in the creation of Soul Bosses,” Kirby continued. “NOVA, the Master Crown, Miracle Fruits – there’s usually something of immense power helping the change along first. Rage and hatred normally aren’t enough to instigate it. Without it, it shouldn’t be able to happen. Then it did. And that doesn’t bode well for the rest of the galaxy. If Knuckle Joe was so easily able to succumb to a minor form of Soulification… then how many people could’ve undergone the process without us knowing?”

An unnerving silence fell over the table. Marx and Magolor described the process of being a Soul Boss after they managed to come back to life. According to them, it wasn’t pretty – their souls were basically corrupted, warped beyond belief until there was only a twisted caricature of them left. They made it sound really painful, too.

And to think there could basically be the equivalent of about twelve more Marx or Magolor Souls running about, causing havoc…

Dee shuddered. “T-That would be terrible!”

“That brings to mind even more questions, though,” Meta Knight noted. “How could Nightmare know about the Soulification process? He had been vanquished in our dimension long before Kirby even saw his first Soul Boss. And I refuse to believe he could stumble across it through simple trial and error.”

“That means he has a way of managing to hear about our adventures,” I realized grimly. That’s the only thing that makes sense. “And it may be tied in to our arrival in this Dream Land.”

I’m beginning to understand Nightmare’s motivations, now. Nightmare wanted to target Pop Star first, as its inhabitants were the source of his first major defeat. He found this world’s King Dedede, who is inexplicably attracted to monsters for reasons I couldn’t comprehend (Weird rebellious phase coming in late?), and is taking advantage of it because he knows this is Kirby’s home planet. If he manages to take out Kirby at his weakest, then he’ll be able to conquer the rest of the galaxy without trouble. And it won’t help that this Dedede is intensely antagonistic.

And I just know that it also has something to do with us coming here. Maybe he’s trying to take out two birds with one stone, or maybe it was by accident. “Whatever the cause may be,” I finally stated, “we’re here now. Nightmare may have gotten away with distorting this universe, but his reign of terror will end here. Two groups of Star Allies are better than one, right?” And it may be just us core Star Allies for now, but I know we won’t be the last from our Pop Star to show up. We beat Void Termina before; we can certainly beat Nightmare now.

“That’s right, Great King!” Dee said, looking just as enthusiastic as I felt. “We’ll toast Nightmare and kick him out of Pop Star forever!”

“Still as enthusiastic as always,” Meta noted. “Hmph… You are right, in a sense. There is no force on this planet and beyond that could ever truly penetrate our defenses.”

“Together – with ‘Lil Kirbs too! – we can reclaim the galaxy from his forces!” Kirby finished our successive proclamations. We sounded pretty cool, actually! Befitting of a king like myself, I’d bet.

“Your actions yesterday tell to me that you have the confidence and the experience to turn your quest into a reality,” Mexican Meta mused. “Very well. I believe the five of us have laid out our stories enough; I must get back to continuing my duties.” The knight got out of his chair, once more wrapped in his cape (Does he ever get hot in there? That can’t be healthy) and ready to go. “I shall be seeing you some other time.”

As he walked out the door, I couldn’t help but let my thoughts wander a bit. Nightmare should know that we’ve long since arrived in this dimension – I mean, he has to have some form of surveillance here. That begs the question…

What is he really going to do with this information?

And will we – or more accurately, this Dream Land – be prepared for when he finally decides to strike?

[N/A]

Nightmare’s Fortress

Customer Service smirked as he analyzed the data being sent in from Pop Star, a location the company was still getting lucrative amounts of good business from. (Even if said customer hadn’t repaid most of his debt to the company.) To supposedly empty air, he stated, “It seems that Dream Land has suffered a dimensional hiccup, Boss.” Behind him, his superior – the eponymous Nightmare of Nightmare Enterprises – warped in, keenly interested in what his subordinate was saying.

“Oh?” his voice echoed throughout the room. “Do tell.”

“Based on the data I’ve managed to obtain,” he explained, “it appears as if they’ve come in contact with inhabitants from another Pop Star, as astonishing as that may seem. There are now two Kirbies, two Meta Knights, and two King Dededes on Dream Land.”

“Is there now?” Nightmare drawled. Customer Service could practically feel a deadly smirk coming from his boss’s face – his aura was simply just that powerful and menacing. “And tell me… what are these intergalactic visitors like? Specifically, this other Kirby and Dedede?”

“I haven’t managed to obtain nearly as much information on that front… but it seems the other Kirby is much more experienced than his squishy counterpart, and the other king is most certainly wiser than he appears to be. The two of them – along with their two other friends – call themselves the Star Allies. They even took down Knuckle Joe, who seemed to be promising on that ‘Soulification’ process you were researching earlier.”

“Oh yes… Oh yes…” Nightmare was now chuckling darkly. “Do continue to keep tabs on Pop Star. I myself have too many things to take care of, as CEO of Nightmare Enterprises, to do that… but I will gladly follow any new insight into this development as my conquest continues. Do not fail me, Customer Service.”

“Yes, Boss.” With that, Customer Service continued his business, being the spokesman and second-in-command of the entire company. Nightmare, meanwhile, began to cackle in utter delight, a sound that could be heard all throughout the fortress.

“Kirby… Dedede… At last, you show your faces to me again!” In clear amusement, the conquering sorcerer outstretched his hands out in front of him, tilting his head back to let his voice boom. “I have been waiting for this day for a long, long time. Rest assured, ‘Star Allies’… There are many demon beasts at my disposal, made just for you. I will take my vengeance on both this Pop Star and yours, and the Gamble Galaxy will suffer my nightmarish wrath as it was always meant to. Just you wait… Ha ha ha ha ha ha… Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!”

Chapter Text

[Kirby (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Kirby’s House (Outside)

It’s been a few days since Knuckle Joe left Pop Star to do… I dunno, monster hunting things? (Whatever the case may be, I wish him good luck!) Since then, Dream Land has largely gone back to normal – a type of routine that us other Dream Landers are quite accustomed to – though Other Dedede seems pretty grumpy at how my and Knuckle Joe’s battle turned out.

I do admit, I kind of stole ‘Lil Kirbs’ spotlight a bit, what with me taking on Knuckle Joe myself. I don’t think he really minded – in fact, the minute we got back home he got straight back to eating his massive feast – but I do feel kind of bad about it.

It also meant he didn’t get as much experience fighting. When it comes to us Star Allies’ business—namely, saving the galaxies and punching evil demons—that’s kind of important. So today, I’ve taken some time off from relaxing to try training him personally in the art of Fighting With Style™! He’s got plenty more monsters left, after all. Probably enough to make up eighty episodes worth of showtime, I’d wager.

It might take a while – I mean, I certainly didn’t master Fighter immediately when I first discovered it – but based on what Tiff’s told me, he’s shown an aptitude for figuring things out. It’s just a matter of refining that from there!

The two of us were out in the yard beside our house currently. I took the time to set up two things: a sign nearby stating ‘Practice in Progress’ (don’t want any communication errors now), and a little training dummy for ‘Lil Kirbs to practice on. I had faith in this one – after all, it was one of the most durable dummies I’ve ever seen.

And if you know me, you should probably already know that it’s Sandbag.

“Alright, ‘Lil Kirbs,” I said to him, my Fighter headband already on my head. “I’m gonna be letting you try Fighter for yourself.” From my hammerspace, my Copy Essence Deluxe for Fighter lay on the floor. I don’t use Copy Essence Deluxes a lot anymore. They don’t quite hold the same amount of power as abilities I get normally, but I’ve still kept them as a sort of memento. “You ready?”

“Poyo! Poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs jumped up and down, clearly excited to try a new Copy Ability. Heh, I remember my own enthusiasm, all those years ago. Sure, I had to fumble quite a bit myself, but it’s still very much the same type of expression.

“I dunno why you’re bothering to try,” Tokkori’s snide voice deadpanned from above. I looked up, seeing him fluttering about with a bored look on his face. Yep—he’s still as irritable as always. “He’ll probably just go and eat more of those melons of his.”

I ignored his complaining. “Why are you even still here, anyway?” I changed the subject. “I didn’t think that you’d be one to watch us do stuff like this.”

“I didn’t have much better to do,” he admitted, “though now that you say it, this looks kind of boring anyway. You can do whatever you want! I’m gonna head into Cappy Town – it’ll be more interesting!” And with that, he flew off toward the direction of the town. That was… a majorly pointless discussion. Did he just want us to acknowledge his presence or something?

Whatever. I’ve got work to do. ‘Lil Kirbs had walked up to the Copy Essence, staring at it with the curiosity of a child. “Poyo?” He poked the pedestal a couple of times, tilting his head after that failed to do anything. It was rather cute, seeing him circle around the Essence and continuously prodding its base. Eventually though, he came into contact with the image of a Knuckle Joe above the pedestal, and he transformed.

Inexplicably—well, a little more inexplicably than by our normal standards anyway—a red headband materialized onto ‘Lil Kirbs’ head, briefly flying off before he caught it and put it back. Unlike mine, this headband was purely red, much like how my own version used to look like. Was that because of an age difference, or a world difference? Hmm.

‘Lil Kirbs looked excited to be able to use it. I could see him tentatively kickboxing the air as initial practice. “Poyooooo poyo!” he declared triumphantly, already looking proud at his simple actions. It was absolutely adorable.

He turned to look at the Sandbag, still standing in the middle of our impromptu training ground. The Sandbag stared back, looking quite nonplussed at the cutesy glare (not that it could really muster any sort of response). “Now,” I started, getting into a ‘teacher’ mode, “first thing first: we need to set up some ground work.” I’m not an expert on how to train people or anything – I mean, I’m self-taught, after all – but I’m pretty sure I can get something done with ‘Lil Kirbs. “Let’s try a Vulcan Jab, how about it?”

“Poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs jabbed the air in front of him, and—much like Knuckle Joe—a wave of energy came out… which missed the Sandbag by a wide margin. “Poyo?” ‘Lil Kirbs tilted his head in curiosity. A few more Vulcan Jabs yielded pretty much the same result; none of them come close to hitting him.

As he kept firing and firing, I mused over how different this variant of the Vulcan Jab was from mine. I thought Knuckle Joe’s version was just something unique to him… maybe it’s just a ‘different universe’ thing. I mean, it’s not like me and ‘Lil Kirbs are exactly the same person. Anyway… “I think you need to focus your attacks on Sandbag, ‘Lil Kirbs,” I said. “Try aiming at him this time.”

“Poyo poyo?” The little puff stared carefully at the Sandbag, before throwing another Vulcan Jab at him. This time, the blow successfully connected. ‘Lil Kirbs’ face lit up. “Poyo! Poyo!” he cheered. Look at ‘im, getting all excited over the littlest of things. We really should’ve stumbled across this universe sooner. He swung his both his arms a few times more, and each successive shot now either hit Sandbag or arced close to him.

He certainly learns fast. Maybe even faster than I did.

“Great work, ‘Lil Kirbs,” I praised him. A delightful smile sprouted on his face. “Let’s try a Spin Kick next.” For demonstration purposes, I ran up to Sandbag and spun three times, unleashing a bigger kick each time. ‘Lil Kirbs looked awed at the sight, and immediately he was set on imitating me. He jumped into the air and spun – and proceeded to start spinning maybe a little too much. Before long, he had overshot the Sandbag and was now wildly heading toward the nearby tree.

A loud whump hit my ears, and I grimaced. Well, that was… something. I walked over to ‘Lil Kirbs, who was currently on the floor nursing his head. “Pooooooooyooooo…” he groaned dazedly, his eyes swirling around.

“…okay, maybe you should try just one kick, then,” I suggested. The triple Spin Kick might be a little too advanced for him right now. I myself didn’t start using it regularly until 2011.

‘Lil Kirbs shrugged off his confusion and ran back to the Sandbag again. He once more attempted a dash kick – but in his excitement, he missed him again (though it did clip him a little). This process proceeded to be repeated a few more times. Honestly, this was kind of bizarre to look at. Though he may learn fairly quickly, it appears that he’s a little clumsy when he doesn’t have an actual enemy to fight.

…somehow, I’m not surprised.

I kind of wish I had a camera now.

These moments must be preserved for all of eternity.

It’s too adorable to not do so.

Eventually, he managed to land a solid kick on Sandbag, the Sandbag taking it pretty hard. I could practically hear the impact and its accompanying sound effects. What ‘Lil Kirbs lacks in precision, he makes up for it in raw power. Pretty impressive, all things considered – especially considering how much younger he is than me.

‘Lil Kirbs really seemed to be getting into the swing of things now. “Poyyyyy-o!” He was executing a wide range of moves on the poor Sandbag, ranging from simple Smash Punches to the Shoryuk—I mean, Rising Break. They were still clumsy in performance, but he was gradually getting better. I watched as the Sandbag became battered all over the place – even if it wasn’t as much as he would normally be. “Great job, ‘Lil Kirbs!” I said, smiling.

“Poyo!” he said in return, raising his arms to the sky. Right afterwards, a loud rumbling sound echoed throughout our improvised arena – distinctly coming from ‘Lil Kirbs. Didn’t take a genius to recognize that sound. It seems like he’s hungry. “Poyo poyo,” he stated, pointing at the general area of his stomach. I got the idea rather fast.

“Alright, alright,” I chuckled. “We can take a break to get you some lunch.”

“Poyoooooo!” he cheered, looking even happier than before.

‘Lil Kirbs stared hungrily at the giant golden cauldron in the middle of our house. I had long since discarded Fighter for Cook, and was currently stirring the pot with a ladle – and adding a bit of spice to the mix as well. Noticeably, when I looked at ‘Lil Kirbs, there was a large drop of drool sticking out of his mouth. Heh, he must be really hungry now.

“Don’t worry, ‘Lil Kirbs,” I reassured him. “You’ll get your lunch soon enough.”

“Poyo…” I think his drool just got a little bigger. He must be really, really hungry then. What an appetite.

As I continued to cook, I heard a set of knocks at the front door. “Come on in; door’s unlocked!” I called. The door swung open, and outside was Bandana Dee in all his bandana-wearing glory. “Hey there, Dee!” I greeted him. “Didn’t expect to see you here today.”

He waved back at me. “Hey, Kirby! I didn’t have anything to do, so I decided to come visit. Say…” He sniffed the air, letting his eyes be briefly drawn to the very visible cauldron. “Whatcha cooking for?”

“’Lil Kirbs got hungry,” I explained, “so I’m making him a little lunch before we get back to training.”

“That… doesn’t look like a ‘little’ lunch to me,” Dee remarked. “You sure it’s not dinner?” It was true; the pot was basically brimming with food. It honestly looked more as if I was trying to create an all-you-can-eat buffet. Which would be nice, but I don’t think now’s a good time.

“Eh, you know how this Copy Ability is,” I said. “Besides, I can save the leftovers for dinner.” Wouldn’t be the first time – turns out that food cooked in this giant cauldron stays fresh for ages. I often end up eating meals that had ended up being prepared whole days in advance. “That is, if ‘Lil Kirbs here doesn’t eat every dish instead.”

“Poyo! Poyo!” Said little puff jumped up and down upon hearing his name being called. From out of nowhere, he pulled out a fork and a spoon, holding them high into the sky. I… didn’t know he knew how to utilize hammerspace. Or a fork and spoon, for that matter.

“I guess you have a point,” Dee admitted. “He looks like he could eat for days.”

Well, since he’s so excited to eat, I should probably get back to focusing on the lunch. I’m pretty sure I can’t overcook with this ability, but there’s no way I want to find out if I actually can. “Hey, Kirby…” Dee awkwardly began, shuffling in place. “C-Can… Can I eat with you two? I, uhh… kind of forgot to eat before coming here… And it’s kind of embarrassing…”

“Of course you can join us!” I stated with a smile, just as ‘Lil Kirbs nodded his agreement with a “Poyo!” of his own. “Things are always more fun with more friends, after all!” Our last adventure proved this really well – sure, a party of me, twelve Dream Friends, and any other Helper nearby traversing the galaxy was kind of overpowered, but it was fun. I know the Jambastion mages had to be constantly on their game because of which. (Heh, it served them right.)

I looked down at the cauldron of food again. “Oh, lunch’s ready!” I announced. Immediately, both ‘Lil Kirbs and Dee’s faces brightened. The former cheered in extreme anticipation; the latter simply looked happy to be eating my food. I didn’t really cook anything too extravagant today – just a couple dozen plates of (thankfully not Superspicy) curry. As per usual, ten plates of said curry rocketed out of my pot and right in front of each of us. In my case, my plate dropped in front of the pot; in ‘Lil Kirbs’, eight dropped all around him—just in case. (Again, see the feast he had a few days ago.)

Speaking of him, his eyes were in awe at this simple sight. Not to mention, he was drooling even harder. “Poyo poyooooo~”

Judging by his reaction, I’m guessing that means his version of Cook is different, too. Maybe even more so than Fighter.

I hopped away from the cauldron, letting it simmer—it can handle a few minutes of just sitting there—and sat down in front of my own food. I could hear the admiration in Dee’s voice, as usual—“This curry looks just as great as always, Kirby! Oh, I can’t wait to dig in!”

“Glad to hear it!” I replied, my eyes twinkling. “Enough dawdling about. Bon appétit, everyone!”

And so the three of us began to eat. Dee and I paced ourselves well… while ‘Lil Kirbs ate as if he had been hungry for a whole day. My curiosity as to how he’d fare in a Gourmet Race is increasingly rapidly by the minute.

I decided to make casual conversation with Dee. “You know, I’ve been thinking a bit…” I began. “How do you think all our friends are doing back home? It has been a while since we first came here, after all.”

“Well…” Dee sat down on the carpet, looking up toward the ceiling. “We did leave rather abruptly. Great King let you go first—” I suppose that’s one way to put it. “—and then we followed after. All of my brethren made it here, too – I guess they found another portal? – so the castle back home should be empty.” He dawdled on that statement for a little, before his face lit up in realization. “O-Oh no! They never saw us leave, so they must think that something bad happened to us! And we have no way to tell them we’re fine!” Andddd now he was starting to panic. And panic eat. Huh, I didn’t know a Dee could shovel food into their non-existent mouths at such a rate.

“Calm down, Dee! I’m sure they don’t think that.” I gave him my best reassuring smile, the one that won over the hearts of many of our enemies. “We’re the Star Allies! They know that we’ll be able to handle anything we put our minds to. In fact, they’re probably looking for a way to get to us right now. We’ll see them soon enough, don’t you worry!”

“You sure?” Dee looked up hopefully at me.

“Of course!” I grinned. “I wouldn’t be saying this if I weren’t!”

Dee closed his eyes for a bit, before opening them and nodding in determination. “…you’re right. They’re our friends. They’d never let us down!”

“Heh heh. That’s the spirit!”

Suddenly, a rather unsophisticated burp echoed through the air. Slowly, the two of us turned our heads to look at ‘Lil Kirbs – who had a circle of eight empty plates, licked clean of their contents, perfectly laid out around him. He was rubbing his tummy in utter satisfaction, while Dee and I had just barely finished our own dish. “He’s done already!?” Dee yelped, staring in shock at the spectacle. I myself could only muster a ‘Huh.’

“…well, I guess that means lunchtime’s over!” I declared, getting off the ground. I looked at my still simmering cauldron for a bit, before shrugging it off. Again, it can wait. “We should get back to training a little bit more. Time’s not gonna wait!”

You know, now that I think about it… “…hey, Dee. You still got your spear on you?” I asked.

“Of course I do!” he stated proudly. “Waddle Dees never leave home without their weapon! Unless they don’t have any, but that’s their problem, not mine!”

“Do you mind helping ‘Lil Kirbs, here? I’m thinking he needs an actual sparring partner to help him along.” If my theory is correct, then he should be able to learn a lot better with a friend. That’s just my guess, anyway.

“I don’t mind! Great King shouldn’t need me for anything today, so I can take the whole day off if I need to! …is that what the Sandbag in the yard is for?”

“Yeah, pretty much.” Master Hand often gives a lot of bonuses to those on the main Smash Bros. roster. The Sandbag’s just one of them.

“Huh. Neato!”

And so here we were, back in the yard – except now ‘Lil Kirbs and Bandana Dee were having a little fight of their own. I immediately noticed the difference in ‘Lil Kirbs’ posture: he was fighting a lot more competently now, skillfully weaving through Dee’s spear strikes and countering with his own blasts.

My theory was definitely right on the nose. I sat close to my house, watching the two as they went at it. This is definitely a sight I could get used to – warm breeze, clear skies, and two friends having fun and even learning while they’re at it.

“Wow, you’re already good at this!” I heard Dee compliment ‘Lil Kirbs as he hopped over a Smash Punch. “You’d be pretty good in Smash Bros. yourself!”

“Poyo poyo!” ‘Lil Kirbs didn’t seem to understand the Smash Bros. part, but I think he knew he was being complimented, at least. He didn’t let it distract him though, and now he was even going for a refined Spin Kick. The two were remarkably enjoying themselves, treating it as if it were any other day.

It really is a nice day today, I thought, letting myself relax against the wall. It’s a peace I’d love to keep. Maybe I can even get Meta Knight and Dedede on this, too. Dedede’s always been a person up for a good fight. It’d even be just like the old days, back when it was just me and him. I think Dee would agree with me that it’d be a sight to see him spar with ‘Lil Kirbs.

It’s been a long time since 1991, huh? I’ve met a lot of people since then. And ‘Lil Kirbs is bound to meet a lot of new friends, too. Speaking of which… I wonder how everyone else is doing, anyway?

Meanwhile…

[Adeleine]

Dream Land (Canon) – Castle Dedede

The first thing that greeted us as we entered the castle grounds was the utter silence that permeated the air. “It’s so quiet here,” I noted, the sounds of footsteps on the grass being the only thing visible to our ears. Like sheesh, there’s not a single Waddle Dee to be found! It’s like everyone just packed up and left for a vacation without telling us! “Where is everybody, seriously?”

“Do you think they all got kidnapped?” Ribbon shakily suggested, floating by my side. “I-It’s not like them to just d-disappear on us like that…”

Magolor walked up next to us, a Nintendo 3DS with a weird antenna in his hands. “That fortunately does not seem to be the case. The readings on my device seem to indicate the brief existence of a dimensional rift near this castle,” he stated, not looking up from his dual screens. “That almost certainly is related to our rather strange predicament. If I can attune my connection a little, then I can figure out where our friends might have possibly gone.”

“Ugh, this is annoying,” Marx remarked, bouncing on his trademark ball. An irritated expression was on his face – not that I could blame him. He’s never been the most patient of people. “How’s a guy supposed to get his pranking kicks around here like this? What am I supposed to do, prank myself? You can’t laugh at yourself falling on a banana peel!”

“Cease your prattling already.” There was Dark Meta Knight – unwillingly dragged along by Marx; his reasoning being ‘Because I thought it would be funny!’ – grumpily standing off to the side and looking like he just really wanted to whip out his sword and cut something already. “It is bad enough that I am away from my training. I do not need your insipid comments to test more of my patience.”

“Oh come on, Darky!” Marx prodded closer to the mirror knight, his expression changing to a teasing, testing one. “What, you don’t like my handsome face? You need a polish on that mask? Because buddy, you need a polish on that mask. Or a pie. A pie would work wonders, too!”

“Don’t test me,” Dark Meta growled again, turning his head away from the jester. “I am giving you this single warning.” His attempts at turning Marx away weren’t really helping though – Marx can be really persistent if you give him the opportunity to.

“Pfft. ‘Don’t test me.’ You still trying to act like an edgelord?” he sniggered. “Come on, I thought you would have lightened up by now!”

Looks like I’ll need to step in. “Marx,” I said, “please try not to antagonize Dark Meta so much. It’s not very polite.”

Marx snorted. “You’re talking as if I was ever a polite person to begin with.” He brought out his wings to do the best impression of a shrug he could. “Eh, whatever! I guess I can go bother Darky some other time.”

Dark Meta kept glaring at him. “I don’t know whether to be grateful, or to be annoyed by your words.” At the very least, he no longer looked like he was ready to pull out his sword at any time.

“Those two really are a handful, huh?” Ribbon sighed. “Kind of makes me wish Daroach was here. He’d know how to work things out.”

“Yeah, he would.” I mean, back during the whole Jamba Heart debacle, he was pretty much our party’s Voice of Reason (next to Kirby, of course, but even he still has his moments). “Too bad he’s busy in the Raisin Ruins right now.” Last I checked, he was searching for treasure with his Squeak Squad. Otherwise, we would have called him over to help.

I do hope he finds whatever treasure he’s looking for, though.

The sound of an increasing radio frequency suddenly filled our ears, and we both turned to look at Magolor. His eyes had widened a fair bit, and he was operating his 3DS with a lot more enthusiasm now. “Ah, I’ve gotten a lock-on! Splendid!” The four of us immediately ran up behind Magolor, trying to look over his shoulder. (Ribbon, luckily, could fly and see from above.)

“What’d you find, what’d you find!?” Ribbon excitedly asked. “Are our friends okay? Do they need help?”

“That irritating counterpart of mine better have not gotten himself possessed again,” Dark Meta grumbled.

“Uhh… You sure it’s not Dedede you’re talking about there?” Marx briefly wondered.

The two screens were showcasing some really weird computer-y things that I didn’t understand. In fact, I don’t think any of us understood it at all. Maybe Kirby could? I remember he was able to hijack and instantly maneuver some mechanical armor just from entering its cockpit.

“…Mags, what even is any of this?” Marx asked. “I’ve never seen any of this before.”

“These are the dimensional frequency readings of the previous rifts here. Every rift leads to a different dimension, and where it will lead is marked with a different frequency each time. I’ve done a lot of travelling ever since I came back to life, so there are plenty of frequencies I can recognize right off the bat.”

“Whoa,” Ribbon was in awe. “That sounds cool. Whole new dimensions?”

“It is not as if it is a new subject for us,” Dark Meta reminded her. “Do not forget—I myself make my home in another dimension.” Right—the Dimensional Mirror. I forgot about that, actually, since Dark Meta hangs about with us most of the time.

“The frequency here, however, is of a universe I’ve rarely been to before. In fact, it’s normally too far for just any dimensional rift to connect to it. Very odd, indeed.”

“What do you remember about the dimension itself, then?” I asked. I hope we don’t have to deal with another evil bad guy again. That’d just be excessive!

“Unfortunately, I do not quite remember the details of the place as well as I do its frequency,” Magolor informed us. “I can, however, tell you that it is not a universe of major danger. Kirby and friends are safe, at least for the time being.”

“That’s a relief!” Ribbon looked relieved.

“Yeah, yeah, that’s good and all,” Marx commented, “just tell us how we’re supposed to get to where they are. I’d love to get my pranking duties back in business.” And by that, I’m sure he means ‘pranking Meta Knight and Dedede relentlessly.’ I know him well enough that he’d easily do that.

“I can easily hook up the Lor and get it moving, though it will take a bit of time. It’d also be a great idea to get an easy and efficient method of transportation between our dimension and our future destination, as there are a many number of things that can go wrong.”

Dark Meta did his signature ‘harumph.’ “Fortunately for you plebeians, the Dimensional Mirror happens to be able of connecting to more than just the Mirror World. I can reroute it as well to suit our needs.”

“Wow—maybe you’re not just all stereotypical edgelord after all!” Marx ‘complimented’, in the loosest sense of the word. “Hey, can I join you too?” he suddenly asked, his eyes twinkling with his usual amount of mischief.

Dark Meta’s answer was short and succinct. “No.”

“Darky, Darky… You’re not gonna get very far in life just saying no all the time! Come onnnnnn—!” He started uncomfortably snuggling up toward the mirror knight, intent on having his way. “Lemme do the mirror thing with you! What’s the harm?” he asked, his tone taking on that of an annoying little child.

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Pretty pleeeeeeeeeeeease?”

“ARGH!” Dark Meta raised his hands to the sky before slumping in defeat “…fine! You can come,” he relented. “Just please, shut that nauseating mouth of yours and don’t make a mess.” Grumpily, he started to trudge off in the direction of his house, Marx happily (and cheekily) trailing behind him. Magolor watched the exchange with interest.

“Hmm, those two are certainly night and day together,” he observed. “Makes me wonder how Kirby managed to recruit Dark Meta Knight, with the way he acts.”

“He may look like an enemy, but I know Kirby’s heart has warmed his cold face up!” Ribbon declared. “He just doesn’t like to show it, that’s all!”

“Yeah. After all we’ve been through together, I can certainly count him along as a friend,” I added. “And I know he thinks of us as ones, too.”

“If you say so,” Magolor said amusedly. “Well, I’ve gotta go get the Lor ready to travel. We certainly won’t be travelling to this new dimension by just sitting around. I’ll be seeing you two, now.”

As Magolor himself marched off in the direction of his ship, my cell phone began to ring in my pocket. In curiosity, I pulled it out – it couldn’t be Kirby or Dedede, since they were ‘away’. And it wouldn’t make sense for Magolor to call, since he just left.

I answered the call. “Hello?”

“Oh—Adeleine! Is that you, my dear?”

Both Ribbon and I recognized that voice instantly – it’s Queen Ripple from Ripple Star. We’ve been to see her quite a number of times since we saved Ripple Star from their Dark Matter problem, and she’s become another dear friend of mine. I put the phone on speaker (one of the few things I know how to do with it) so Ribbon could interact. “Your Majesty!” Ribbon’s face brightened up. “Are you okay? Did Dark Matter come back or anything?”

“Oh, heavens no, Ribbon! Nothing bad has happened—indeed, it’s quite the opposite! You see, we’ve just managed to establish communications with a new kingdom, and I’d be honored if you and Adeleine could help us out. Of course, if you’re too busy, I entirely understand.”

“No, no, it’s fine!” Ribbon assured her queen. “I’d love to help you out, Your Majesty!”

“Yeah, me too,” I agreed. It’s gonna be a while before we can get this whole ‘another dimension’ thing solved, so it’ll be nice to help someone out in the meantime. “We can be there in a few minutes or so! ‘Sides, you’re a friend! There’s no way we could say no.”

“That’s wonderful! I know you two will be a big help,” Queen Ripple stated. “I hope to see you two again soon. It has been a while since your last visit, and we have so much to talk about.”

“Yeah, I know. Catch you on Ripple Star!” The call ended, and I turned to smile at Ribbon. “So… You ready to fly, Ribbon?”

“You betcha, Adeleine!” my companion said. “Ooh, I can’t wait to see what this new kingdom is like! You think they’ll be as nice as Dedede?”

“Heh, maybe. Or maybe they’re a Dedede from another dimension,” I jokingly suggested as I summoned a Warp Star. We always have one on hand in case we need to fly across the galaxy.

“That’d be something to see!” Ribbon giggled. The idea itself brought plenty of laughs to my eyes – can you imagine two Dededes getting all cute and flustered over Queen Ripple? I could paint pictures for days. And even if it doesn’t happen to be a Dedede from another dimension (you never really know anymore), I’m certain that it’ll be an event to remember.

I latched onto the Warp Star, Ribbon hugging my shoulder tight. Whatever happens, I’m sure I won’t regret it. “Alright,” I said, “let’s move!” And with that, the Warp Star flew up high and into the clouds.

Chapter Text

[Rick]

Dream Land (Anime) – Whispy’s Forest

“What the bloomin’ heck is up with this weather?” I grumbled, my feet making crunching noises with every step I took. “It’s not nearly as snowy back home – and there definitely shouldn’t be so many leaves scattered about, either.”

“I’d hate to be the one caught unprepared with this cold front,” Coo stated beside me, having chosen to walk alongside me and Kine. “For us, this type of weather is nothing compared to the likes of Echo’s Edge or Planet Frostak. The temperatures there were certainly much lower.”

“It’s still kind of annoying, though,” Kine said. “Cold often seeps into the water, too, and it takes a while to get warm while swimming. I remember back on Planet Frostak, Dedede even got turned into a popsicle.”

“That was quite the spectacle, wasn’t it?” Coo recalled. I remembered that scene – Dedede had wanted to stretch and go for a swim, only to be immediately frozen into a block of ice. And I mean really frozen. It took Kirby, Gooey, and I several minutes straight to thaw him (while he had the most hilarious expression, mind you) while Marx laughed his butt off. “I honestly wonder if he even considered that he was diving into a pool of water on an ice planet.”

I shrugged my shoulders. “Who knows, mates? You know our esteemed King can be very ‘act first, think later’ at times. It’s not like it’s anything new.”

Coo chuckled. “Yes, I suppose that’s true.”

The three of us had been walking around our Great Forest back home, idly minding our own business. It had been almost a month since Kirby had disappeared—he, Meta Knight, King Dedede, and Bandana Dee, actually. And yes, that was all four core members of us Star Allies. That was one heck of a coincidence.

As we were chatting, some kind of strange portal opened up before us – quite literally between us three, too – and sucked us in. And now we were just in this strange winter wonderland, trying to figure out where everything was and why we were here. Though, knowing Kirby, I had no doubt that this was likely related to his disappearance. Strange things happen when he’s around, after all.

“How big is this forest, anyway?” I asked. “It seems almost as big as our Great Forest back home.” Seriously, the trees above us were so thick, you could barely make out the streaks of any sunlight.

“If you’d like, I can always scout above for an exit,” Coo suggested. “I’ve got plenty of energy to spare, and like I said, it’s not exactly that cold.”

“That’d be nice,” Kine replied. “Maybe we could find where Kirby went, or the rest of our friends.” Suffice to say, it’d be nice to at least be reassured that Kirby was alright. Sure, everyone back home is well-capable of fighting, but he is our greatest defender.

Coo spread his wings and fluttered up into the air, maneuvering around the branches in order to make his way to the top. “There’s a lot of snow up here!” he called back to us. “But I should be able to—” Suddenly, a smacking noise echoed from up above, and I heard our owl cry, “What the heck!?”

And then, for some reason, the exact same voice said, “I should be the one saying that to you!” Kine and I looked upward, and to our surprise, we saw two Coos descending down to our visible range. Except this new Coo’s feathers were colored a darker purple, with smaller pupils too. He was in the midst of an impromptu glaring contest with our friend. “What kind of imposter are you?”

“Imposter?” Our Coo looked a tad insulted. “How do I know that you’re not just a Dark Matter clone or something imitating my form?” I’m pretty sure that Dark Matter can’t do that – they’re either a swordsman or a black eye – but it could be something like a Haltmann clone. (Do you know how weird it is to face a purple duplicate of yourself? No? Yeah, I wish I could say the same.)

Another voice—my own—interrupted the proceedings. “Hey, Coo!” it shouted. “What’d you find?” Walking up to us was an almost identical duplicate of myself, only with the brown of his fur a little brighter. Our eyes soon met, and his eyes widened fast. “Oi, oi, oi! What’s the meaning of this!?”

I shrugged again. “I have no idea,” I answered.

“There’s two of you, and two of Coo,” Kine observed. His gaze was drawn toward the nearby river running through the forest. “That must mean that there must also be two of…”

As to finish his statement, a Kine with a larger mouth and a duller blue skin swam up to the shore. “Did you find Tiff?” he asked slowly, sounding a little dimwitted for whatever reason. (What? He really does!) “It’d be nice if Tiff was here – my love could help keep her warm in this cold.”

Our Kine blinked. “…what?” he stated, confused by his alternate’s words, and I have to admit—I was too. “Love? Keep her warm? What does that even mean?”

“Hey, wait a minute…” The other Kine looked at the two of us closely, before concluding, “You’re not Tiff…”

“I don’t even know who Tiff is,” our Kine stated. “You sure you’re not talking about Mine instead?”

“Guys, guys, guys,” I interrupted. “I’m sure there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for this,” Well, as reasonable as it gets by Kirby’s standards anyway, “so let’s calm down and talk things out.” It’s what Kirby would do, after all.

Unfortunately, my hopes ended up a little bit dashed. “Oh, I’m not calming down to this imposter here!” the alternate Coo declared, looking like he was ready for a fight.

“I’ll show you who’s the imposter here!” our Coo retorted, spreading his wings in preparation for his Cutter move. Coo always did have low tolerance for situations like these. While it does mean he’s easily prepped for the stuff we often handle back home, it means he can be a little… hot-headed, at times. (And he’s supposed to be the wise owl.)

I put my face into my palm. “Oh boy…” I muttered. “This is gonna take a while…”

After a while, I managed to get the two Coos calmed down from their fight-ready stances with the help of my counterpart – though it certainly wasn’t easy, given their characters. Stuff like this makes me glad I don’t usually take leadership around here – like, how does Kirby do it? I’d rather just lay down and have a nice nap myself.

“Y’know,” my counterpart was saying, “when we got another Kirby ‘round here, I didn’t expect to see another me show up as well. Or you blokes, either. It’s something out of a bad story, is what it is!”

“They don’t seem that bad,” the other Kine stated. Now that I think about it, his tone really reminds me of another friend of mine—Gooey. It’s probably the way he drawls a bit with his speech. “They look like friends enough.”

“How’s Kirby, by the way?” I decided to ask. “It’s been a while since we’ve seen him, what with the whole ‘going through dimensions’ thing going on.”

“Oh, he’s been fine, if that’s what you want to know,” Coo’s counterpart told us. “We don’t see him around a lot, but when we do, we have an alright time. Honestly, we interact more with his smaller counterpart more.”

“Smaller counterpart?” I inquired. “He’s got one too? What’s he like?”

“He’s like a ‘lil kid,” my own alternate explained. “He can only really say ‘Poyo’ and is more than a little absent-minded sometimes. Oh, and he likes food. Lots and lots of food.”

“Well, that’s not surprising,” our Coo said. “It seems that, no matter what universe we wind up in, there’s always a puffball with a love for all edible objects.” He shook his head. “Hopefully, this Kirby doesn’t get so stingy over his food.”

“Stingy?” Huh, they don’t know? …I guess Kirby hasn’t had a situation like that yet. Then again, that’s for the best – I don’t think anyone’s really ever let him forget the Squeak Squad incident, even if it’s in a joking manner.

“Eh, that’s something you won’t need to know right now, mate,” I dismissed. “Just… never steal Kirby’s food. Ever. In fact, don’t steal from both of them. You’ll only get pain. Lots… and lots… of pain. Many a bloke can tell you that.” Trust me; I’m pretty sure I’ve seen several foes flinch upon the thought of that happening again.

“…ooooookay…” I could tell my alternate self had no idea what I was talking about.

“You know, now that I think about it, you three came in at a really good time,” the other Coo mentioned. “This abrupt winter storm has really been a hindrance on all of us, and I need plenty of help to get everyone resituated as this cold front keeps blowing.”

“This winter season isn’t natural?” our Coo promptly asked. Huh, you’d think that’d be a little stranger, but—well, it really is nothing compared to the likes of Dark Matter or the Robobot invasion. “Could’ve fooled me otherwise. You’ve got the snow and everything.”

“You should’ve seen the clouds,” Kine’s counterpart said. “They just came in out of nowhere, totally washing away all the heat.”

“It was almost as if Dedede—our Dedede—had summoned another one of his monsters, or something,” my counterpart remarked. So this Dream Land has a problem with monster attacks. Eh, again, nothing that’s totally unusual. That other part, though…

“Your Dedede’s a bit of a bad guy?” I inquired. “Ours’ hasn’t been in years.”

“I guess that’s another difference between our universes,” Kine noted. “So, where do you need us to go? If your friends need help, then we’ll be there to help.”

“Reminds me a bit of the Robobot invasion, actually,” Coo commented.

“Yeah, I get what you mean,” I said. I still remember that incident fairly well – we had to protect our entire forest from all the robots trying to get through. We even managed to prevent Adeleine, Ribbon, and Gooey from getting captured by them a few days into the invasion. This situation isn’t quite as dire, but I’m still getting shades of it myself.

My counterpart looked even more confused. “Robobot invasion? What’s that all about?”

“Tell you later, mate.” It’s a long story; not something you can just casually start talking about. “Let’s get helping!”

“Glad to see you’re willing to help,” Coo’s alternate stated. “Here, I’ll show you the way.”

And so here we were, literally walking alongside ourselves, in an all new Dream Land on an all new Pop Star – with even duplicates of our other missing friends, too. Who knows what we’ll see from here? All I can say is… things are gonna get pretty interesting, especially once all our other friends come around as well.

Maybe we’ll even get to beat up these ‘monsters’, just like the old days. That’ll be a time!

Chapter Text

[Tiff]

Dream Land (Anime) – Near Whispy’s Forest

It was snowing in Dream Land.

It was supposed to be summer.

A very hot summer.

And we don’t even get a lot of snow when it actually is winter.

I’m willing to bet this was another Dedede stunt, but I don’t exactly have any way to prove that yet.

Nevertheless, it didn’t stop everyone else from enjoying all the snow that now covered Dream Land. It was everywhere, even going up right to our ankles – which made it perfect weather for snowboarding, photographing, and even ski lifting. As usual, the Star Allies didn’t bat much of an eye over this. Their Dedede just shrugged and said, “Eh, so the weather’s acting a little weird. That’s nothing too special, really.”

In fact, that seems to be how everyone was taking things.

I really wish everyone wasn’t so nonchalant about this, but—again—there’s nothing I can do about that.

Of course, this Dedede being Dedede, the next thing he proceeded to do was make a snowball and throw it at his Kirby’s face. The older Star Warrior just grinned and proclaimed, “Oh, it’s on!”, and then they started a snowball fight.

I was honestly not surprised by that development.

What is kind of surprising is how much the fight escalated over such a short period of time.

Sitting with my back against a nearby tree, I had a pretty good view of what the Star Allies were doing in this wintery, snowy weather. And as such, I got to see things start out as a simple ‘make balls, throw balls’ fight. Then they gradually began adding fortifications, their other friends (with Meta Knight and the two Kirbies on one side; Bandana Dee and Tuff on Dedede’s)…

…and then somehow we got to massively tall, well-defended snow fortresses that—under normal circumstances—shouldn’t have been able to be built in just hours. They even had working cannons, which also shouldn’t have been possible.

I knew the Star Allies were pretty special based on the tales of their adventures (and Knuckle Joe’s visit), but… sheesh, I don’t know what to say! Will our Kirby grow to become like this, too? I don’t know if that’s a little exciting or a little terrifying—or both. It could definitely be both, with these guys.

I’ll say this: despite everything’s that happened so far, they know have to have fun.

I’ve got something interesting to write in my journal now, at least.

(…what? No, it’s not a diary, w-why would you think that…?)

[Kirby (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Atop Kirby’s Frigid Fortress (don’t ask)

“Keep firing!” I commanded to a nearby Waddle Doo, him obeying and firing his snowball cannon with gusto. Shots fired back at us from the opposing side, but we weren’t about to just let them walk over us! We needed every little edge we could get, no matter how small!

It’s been a while since we’ve had a fight like this; there’s no way were going to lose now!

“You just keep on trying!” Dedede taunted from the roof of Snow Castle Dedede. “But only kings will be able to rise atop this battlefield today!” His own fortress wasn’t half-bad, either – it was a pretty accurate miniature rendition of his home castle, with the cannons functioning exactly as the actual ones. Sure, he’s got an advantage in that category, not to mention his half of the Waddle Dee brigade – but we’ve got me and ‘Lil Kirbs! That’s a combination that just can’t be beaten!

…oh, and Meta Knight too, but it’s mostly me and ‘Lil Kirbs.

“Well, then I think it’s time Dream Land got a new king, then!” I playfully retorted back. With my Ice ability on full blast, I set myself to creating another pile of snowballs to throw (probably not how Ice Breath is supposed to work, but I don’t care). “Here goes!” One by one, I swallowed a snowball from my pile and exhaled it back toward Dedede. To his credit, he managed to dodge each one with ease, sidestepping and spinning outta the way.

I’m surprised he can do that amidst the chaos of all the cannons firing. Then again, I could say the same thing about myself.

“It’ll take more than that to take me down, Kirby!” With a grin of his own, he whipped out his Deluxe Dedede Hammer (the one he wears while masked, not the Star Rod-enhanced one), utilizing his devastating rocket launcher as a rapid-fire snowball-throwing machine. Clever! I thought, rolling up into an Ice Ball and rolling out.

A giant snowball—from one of Dedede’s cannons, I realized—smashed into the roof and nearly made me trip, a virtual earthquake propping up from the impact. This managed to distract me enough to get a smaller snowball to actually hit me dead-on. “Oof!” And now I was on the floor.

“Ha! Gotcha!” Dedede cheered. He whooped-whooped in quick succession, momentarily letting his guard down. “The perfect King reigns supreme!” As I got up, I realized something—Now’s my chance!

“‘Lil Kirbs!” I called. The younger puffball rushed over to my side. I noticed there was a little snow castle where he just was. Awwww, it looks just like my Frigid Fortress (shut up, it’s a cool name)! I can even see the cannons and the Waddle Doos on the miniature roof! Great minds think alike, I suppose!

“Poyo!” He looked ready to charge in and do something. Actually, he was light blue now, with a hat made of ice crystals atop his head. He must’ve gotten the Ice ability while I wasn’t looking – maybe he ate an icicle or a nearby snowball, or something. Would explain the flash of light I could’ve sworn I saw earlier.

With his attention on me, I pointed toward Dedede (who was still whooping—like, seriously?). “You see Dedede over there?” I asked.

‘Lil Kirbs nodded ‘yes.’ Great; this’ll make things easier.

I grinned. “Well,” I started saying, now motioning toward my still half-full pile of snowballs on the ground, “he wants a good old-fashioned ice-cold pie right ‘bout now! You wanna give it to him personally?”

“Poyo—poyo!” he cheered. Yep, yep—I can see my developing plan coming all together now! Dedede’s never gonna see this coming.

Within moments, ‘Lil Kirbs had gulped up the remaining snowballs I had yet to throw – but he didn’t completely swallow them. (This admittedly unnecessary plan wouldn’t work if he did, after all!), and I was holding him up above my head with both my hands. My lottle grin got wider, if that was even possible. “Go long, ‘Lil Kirbs!” I called, throwing him toward Dedede’s face as hard as I could.

I may not have had the Suplex ability equipped on me, but I still had enough strength based on my experience in Smash. I watched the event from afar – ‘Lil Kirbs opened his mouth right before impact, and Dedede proceeded to get a face full of ice-cold snow. “YAHHHHHHHH!” he screamed, flailing his arms around like Bowser often does. ‘Lil Kirbs wasn’t helping him on that front, happily blasting more ice in his face. “This is so not fair OH GOD IT’S SO COLD AHHHHHHHH—!”

“Poyo poyo!”

“Shaddup you’re not helping—!”

“Oh yeah,” I snickered. “I got ‘em.” Just ‘cause I prefer the use of melee weaponry doesn’t mean I don’t know how to pitch a projectile! Ha!

Then I got smacked in the face with one of Dedede’s spare hammers and got knocked over again.

“You totally deserve it!” Dedede called out, though still audibly panicking.

“Point!” I shouted back.

[Meta Knight (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Fortress Outskirts (Side: Kirby)

When one thinks of my name, they typically see me as a hardened, no-nonsense warrior who focuses purely on any possible threats that may come to threaten Dream Land – or at least, that’s what the last poll I saw almost unanimously agreed upon. (I question why such a poll would exist to begin with, or how I even got a ‘fanbase’, as Kirby and Dedede put it.)

In any case, such a depiction of me is mostly true. Accounts from both my associates and acquaintances will tell you that much.

However, do not let that be an absolute truth – contrary to popular belief, I do, in fact, know how to unwind and even join in on the play sessions my close allies often insist on. ‘Being so worked up all the time isn’t good for your health,’ I recall Bandana Dee saying to me once.

I suppose he’s not wrong, in that regard.

In any case, Kirby and Dedede are currently locked in war – a snowball war, if you will. Two impenetrable castles as durable as they are ridiculous (though I will admit, they are impressive when you consider their primary material) standing tall nearby the forest, inhabited by two sides who refuse to go down without a cold and bitter fight.

And it is here where I stand now.

In front of each fortress lies a battlefield, encompassing two opposing armies of Waddle Dees, several snow-made barracks, and several mountainous piles worth of snowballs. Truly, this is a battleground the likes of which this Dream Land has never seen before – and I intend to put all of my energy into my current participation against dethroning Dedede from his status as snowball fight king.

Without overutilization of Galaxia, of course.

It wouldn’t be a true snowball fight otherwise.

Projectiles rained down on both sides, smashing against our barracks and the wall of Kirby’s ‘Frigid Fortress’ (or so he insists). I happened to be in cover, my back against one of said barracks, barking orders as was my custom. “Show our enemies no mercy!” I commanded. “The might of our snow forces shall be enough to topple their castle where it stands!”

“You heard the man!” one of the Waddle Dees nearby stated. “Throw your snowballs like there’s no tomorrow!”

Of course, we were not without a sturdy opposition. Bandana Dee was still supporting his king, after all, and he boasted the ability to command his brethren with excellent teamwork tactics. I dare say even my Meta Knightmares could learn a thing or two from him – though I am certain Captain Vul would grumble quite a bit about that fact.

As of now, he had a bunch of Waddle Dees dedicated to building up a mass of giant snowballs, which would then be hauled off to another squadron of Waddle Dees to toss at us. This proved surprisingly effective, as the majority of us had little in the way of advanced defensive maneuvers for that.

I believe there are several more Waddle Dees on our side down than on his side, based on the number of Waddle Dees I saw dazed from the impact of each.

“Sorry, guys, but I have a duty to my Great King!” I overheard Bandana Dee crying to us from his side. He was standing atop a self-made tower with a megaphone in his hand. (Where he got that is unknown to me.) He had his spear in his other hand hand, twirling about and dissipating any snowball that dared to come near his presence. “D-Don’t worry, though! This battle will be over before you know it! I-If you surrender, we can make it faster, too!”

“Unfortunately, that is a request I cannot accept,” I calmly replied in my usual manner. “As a knight, it would be remiss of me to give up now while there is still a chance of victory.”

“…oh. Well, okay Meta! D-Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though!” I watched as Dee rounded up his friends to continuing their devastating strategies. It was clear that we would need a strategy of our own if we were to come out on top of this with victory in our grasp. If Kirby and Dedede were able to create these fairly elaborate castles out of nothing but snow, complete with working infantry, then perhaps we can perform something similar.

Thanks to my experience with the Meta Knightmares, I have an idea as to what we should do.

“Waddle Dees. Waddle Doos.” Immediately, several pairs of eyes (individual eyes, for some) turned toward me at my commanding tone. Unseen, an uncharacteristic smirk came upon my face. It would also be remiss of me if I did not retaliate in equal force, as well.

“I have a plan we can execute. Let us get to it.”

[Bandana Dee]

Dream Land (Anime) – Fortress Outskirts (Side: Dedede)

I was getting pretty worried now. We had been hitting the opposing side with as many snowballs as we could toss for a while now, but I haven’t heard anything back from them since we renewed our assault. What could they be up to? I hope it’s not anything too big – we may be on the advantageous side right now, but if we’re not careful, that won’t last.

Ohhhhh, I don’t like worrying like this!

“H-Have we managed to find any intel about our enemy’s actions?” I nervously asked a nearby scout, after I had climbed down from my place on the tower. I’d be biting my nails right now if I had any nails… or if I had a mouth at all, actually. “T-This silence is—it’s really concerning!” And that wasn’t a lie, trust me.

The scout shook his head. “They’ve been surprisingly quiet in the last half-hour,” he relayed the information to me. “As far as we know, they could be gearing up for a secret weapon the likes of which we have not seen yet. If that happens, we may not be able to enact an efficient counterattack, and our lead may possibly be lost.”

I shuddered. No way; we can’t lose this now! As the Great King’s loyal retainer, I know that we’ll be able to triumph over this crisis! Kirby, ‘Lil Kirbs, and Meta Knight may be our opponents for today, but that doesn’t mean we can’t put up a good fight! Our own combo of me, Great King, and Tuff will surely win the day!

At least, I hope so…

“K-Keep hitting them harder, then!” I stammered out. “They can’t unleash their weapons or whatever if we take them out first, r-right!?” I—I wasn’t really sure how well this would work out, but… it should work! If it isn’t broke, it doesn’t need fixing—that’s how the statement goes, right?

It—It’ll be fine!

The scout nodded and went on to communicate my instructions to everybody else. As I heard our snowball firing escalate all around us, I sat around a little worried and beginning to wish I actually did have nails to bite (and a mouth to bite them on). I’d just have to hope that our current momentum would be enough to end this show quickly, before we got screwed. And I—I don’t want to be screwed like that, believe me!

Great King wouldn’t like it, either!

It was then that I started wondering what Great King and Tuff was doing right around now. Great King, I remembered, was up on the roof dealing with Kirby (similarly on his fortress’s roof) himself. And Tuff was… Uhh… I think he was having fun firing some of the cannons we set up in the snow castle? He seemed to be plenty enthusiastic about the whole fight, and—and that’s good! T-That’s good. I mean, it’s always nice to see people enthusiastic for the stuff we end up doing! I wish we could’ve gotten some of the other kids in, too, but I think they were busy snowboarding. (K-Kind of a shame, honestly…)

My mind then turned to whatever ace up his sleeve Meta Knight happened to have. Was it a superpowered snow sword? A gigantic snow cannon that could launch even bigger snowballs than we can produce? A snow-made console that could play that infamous ‘Sonic ‘06’ game I’ve heard so much about???

I didn’t know, and… hopefully we didn’t have to know?

Unfortunately, that wouldn’t come to pass… because Meta Knight chose then to whip out said ‘ace up his sleeve’.

Oddly enough, this first popped up with the sound of… something spluttering from ahead? I narrowed my eyes in utter confusion. Nothing here can make a sound like that, not even the ski lift Cappy Town managed to put up! I surmised to myself. Now that I think about it, that spluttering sounds kind of like—

“Bandana Dee, sir!” one of my brethren suddenly called out to me, running up to my side (while panting; how far had he run?). “We’ve got bad news relating to our enemy!”

Oh no. “How… How bad is it?” I tentatively asked, almost not wanting to hear the answer. (But it wasn’t like I really had a choice now, right?)

“Well… Just take a look for yourself, sir.” We walked up to the barracks, and I peeked over it to see just what was going on with Kirby’s side.

I, uhh… kind of regretted looking over there just a second afterward.

Because rising up from behind the Frigid Fortress were a trio of snow helicopters, their blades coptering and making loud noises and coming right over to us, with snow-based weaponry ready to fire at our poor, poor castle. At the center of the trio was a helicopter with Meta Knight’s mask at the front (of course. of course he would), and Meta Knight himself was peeking out as if to say, ‘Yeah. I’m coming to screw you over, and you’re going to like it. Because I’m Meta Knight.’

…I’m pretty sure that’s not what he’d actually say, but—that’s what it feels like, anyway!

“Oh crud,” I said aloud, and my fellow Waddle Dee echoed my sentiments.

“Yep, sir. ‘Oh crud’ indeed.”

The other Waddle Dees and Doos weren’t much better. A sea of shouts, ranging from ‘You have got to be kidding me!’ to ‘We’re all gonna dieeeeeee!’ and much, much more began to stream out from our little squadron of snowball shooters, and no amount of giant snowballs set up would stifle this rising panic at all.

As the helicopters—and our impending doom—came ever so closer, Meta Knight calmly stated a single word that elegantly described this whole situation. “Checkmate.” He made sure we could hear it, too, with a smugness that he normally didn’t have at all.

I sweatdropped. “I… I hope Great King knows a way we can fight back against this…”

[Tuff]

Dream Land (Anime) – Snow Castle Dedede

Oh yeah, this is awesome!

I don’t care what anybody says, this is the greatest snowball fight I’ve ever participated in! I almost wish we got more snow here in Dream Land, just so we can have stuff like this more often!

The other Dream Land guys really rule! I mean, we have two whole castles now, built out of snow! How isn’t that cool!? It’s like something out of a video game!

…huh, that sounds ironic for some reason… Maybe Tiff knows why?

“Let’s go, let’s go!” I cheered, firing another one of these awesome cannons over at the Frigid Fortress (and I only wish we had an equally cool name for our castle). Waddle Dees and Waddle Doos were running all about, handling several snow cannonballs in their hands to put into the cannons as they fired. I don’t know where they’re getting it all, but hey, whatever helps us fight better, right!?

“We’re on it!” they were saying. I just had the biggest grin on my face right now, and I was sure that we were going to win this fight! The two Kirbies won’t be able to do anything to us at this rate!

Just then, I heard a bunch of weird noises coming down from the nearby staircase – the one leading up to the roof, actually.

“Oof! Ow! Y-Yowch!”

“Poyo! Poyo poyo!”

“H-Hey, what’s going on!?” I exclaimed as a result. All of us whipped around to see what was going on, and then we saw Dedede – the cool one, mind you – and our Kirby tumbling down the stairs in a sort of tumbleweed-like formation! (That sounds like something Tiff would say…) By the time they finished bouncing down, Dedede was laying sprawled out all over the floor and practically half-frozen with our Kirby—who was wearing a hat I’ve never seen him wear before (and… is he blue?)—standing on top of him. He beamed at our flabbergasted faces. “Poyo!”

“U-Uh-oh,” I nervously stated, backing away a little bit. The rest of us were doing the same – we had been infiltrated! One of the enemy’s numbers have broken in through our defenses! He even knocked out our leader (kinda) – and that isn’t good!

Dedede comically raised a hand into the air, telling us, “Avenge me, Waddle Dees! I have been soundly defeated! …and also I’m cold and I need a heater. Oh NOVA, it’s like Planet Frostak all over again…” (Uhh, what’s a ‘Planet Frostak’? W-Whatever, that doesn’t matter now!)

And now our Kirby was looking at us, with that fancy ice hat and some probably fancy ice powers to go along with it. Not to mention, he was also on the other Kirby’s side. As in, not our side.

Yeah, this wasn’t good at all!

“G-G-Guys! K-Kirby’s here!” I stammered, flailing my arms about in panic. There was no way I, or anyone else, would be able to fight Kirby, especially not when he has a Copy Ability on him! (And again, I’ve never seen it before, too!) “W-We have to do something!”

Immediately, most of the Waddle Dees and Doos (the ones that weren’t attending to Dedede) began to pick up a bunch of snowballs and were tossing them at Kirby. But he was just as good at dodging them as he was at fighting monsters (or demon beasts, as my sister sometimes calls them), skating and sliding out of the way despite the fact that I’m pretty certain this is the first time he’s ever had this ability!

I was scrambling to get out of range and find something to get a bigger edge. Luckily for me, some of the Waddle Dees were still building up another snow cannonball, and that got me thinking about something.

If normal snowballs aren’t going to do anything, how about we started using bigger snowballs?

No, not just that! We have to use the biggest snowball we can! Make it so big it might even cause an avalanche!

“Hey, guys!” I loudly whispered to them. They looked at me. “I have an idea!”

A few minutes later, there was a gigantic, majestic, towering snowball, almost reaching the ceiling of the room we were in (and, lemme tell you, the ceiling’s pretty high up there!). Surprisingly, Kirby hadn’t seen it yet – actually, he was still skating around and not really paying much attention to the battle that was going on.

Maybe he’s trying to distract us?

Then again, it’s hard to fake the happy look on his face…

A-Anyway. It doesn’t matter if he’s trying to distract us – if anything, he’s the one distracted now! Which means now is the perfect time to strike! “Alright, gang!” I commanded (all cool like, too!), pointing at the skating Kirby. “Let’s go save our castle!”

The Waddle Dees and I walked up to our gigantic snowball and started pushing it toward Kirby. It was… pretty hard to – this thing was heavy! “Heave… ho…! Heave… ho…!” It took so many of us to even get the ball rolling, but eventually, we got it moving! And Kirby’s never going to see it coming! This is the perfect plan!

And then I pushed a little too hard and got tangled up with the snowball. “W-Whoa!” I yelped, tumbling up and down and all around and I think I heard Kirby yelp too and get caught up and whoaaaaaaa I’m getting a little dizzy and is that the wall—

KA-BLAM!

[King Dedede (Canon)]

I dazedly started getting up off the floor, helped up by my trusty Waddle Dees and Doos. Heh, I should give them a bit of a vacation sometime, for all the work they do for me. They’ve been a great help in this snow war, too. I really don’t appreciate them enough.

Meanwhile… “I’m still feeling the brain freeze,” I muttered to myself, shaking off the ice that had gotten all over me. “Wait, does it really count as brain freeze if it wasn’t caused by a smoothie? Mmm, that ice breath must’ve been colder than I expected…”

I shook my head. “Okay, I’m back in the game now!” I said aloud. “Thanks, guys.” The Dees and Doos beside me nodded with confidence, and were just as ready to continue the fight as I was. “Now then, where were… we?” Just then, I noticed that there was a conspicuously big hole in the wall facing Kirby’s Frigid Fortress… like, a little too huge. And I think the rest of the wall was coming down with it.

Snow dust sprinkled down from the ceiling as we spoke. That meant the castle itself was on shaky ground right now. I could also see some sort of gigantic snowball spiraling toward Kirby’s place – probably the source of our giant hole problem. And soon, probably Kirby’s problem, too. And probably the problem of all the other Dees out in the field, who were visibly running as far as they could away from the impeding ball of doom.

We just stared as it went, contemplating the situation as it continued.

“…huh. I guess that happened,” was the only thing I could reasonably say as the castle started shaking around us.

Welp—I guess now’s a good time to abandon ship, as they say!

And it looks like everyone else agrees with me, too!

[Meta Knight (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Fortress Outskirts (Side: Kirby)

“Do I want to know what monstrosity birthed that rampaging titan?” I queried as I and the Dees beside me witnessed a giant snowball – with Tuff and Kirby’s counterpart visibly trapped as it went – tumble right out of the front of Snow Castle Dedede. It was a sight that made us pause our relentless assault on the snow castle itself.

“I, uhh… don’t think so?” one of the Waddle Dees stated, equally as baffled as I.

I questioned how such a giant snowball could have been made within the walls of the castle – but then again, I don’t have much room to speak, having assisted in the creation of these functional helicopters myself.

In any case, the spectacle briefly distracted us from our assault on the on the collapsing snow castle… enough time for the forces below – who we had been effortlessly dodging – to strike our helicopters down.

“G-Guys! Now’s our chance!” I heard Bandana Dee’s voice cry, and it was then I realized we needed to get moving.

I rushed over to the controls in an attempt to steer us away from the incoming cannonballs, but by then it was too late. The cannonballs had hit all three of our vehicles directly, sending them spiraling out of control. There would’ve been an alarm system going off had we actually installed one, though perhaps the Waddle Dees initiating panic as we descended.

The only thing I could really do at this point was try to keep us relatively steady as we descended. My eyes narrowed. “Brace yourselves, Waddle Dees,” I warned. “I have a feeling this will not be a pleasant landing.” At the very least, I can rest assured that this won’t be like the Halberd’s continuous crashes.

As we continued to spin toward the barracks in front of Snow Castle Dedede, Bandana Dee’s voice became ever louder as he realized the severity of the situation. “…wait, guys. Why—why are the helicopters coming toward us!?”

“Oh, NOVA no!”

“Everybody runnnnn!”

“I didn’t sign up for this!—oh wait, I did!”

“Go go go go guys the castle’s collapsing we have to go,” (That was Dedede coming out, by the way), “wait WHAT THE HECK IS THAT SERIOUSLY—”

And then, impact.

KA-BLAM!

[Kirby (Canon)]

Dream Land (Anime) – Near Whispy’s Forest

Ohhhh, sweet NOVA…

I feel like I got bowled over by a gigantic snowball…

…oh wait, that’s exactly what happened…

I think it actually knocked out my Copy Ability, too…

After a bit of effort, I managed to get myself unstuck from what felt like a large pile of snow, pushing myself off of it despite my rather stubby arms. Man, I internally groaned, I feel kind of like Sonic right now… As I shook my head to regain my bearings, I looked around at the state of my Frigid Fortress and Snow Castle Dedede.

They were, umm… no longer existent. In fact, now they were kind of just large piles of snow… which I was now standing upon. I think I could see several Waddle Dees and Doos buried within the ruins, too, flailing their hands and feet around.

Though, Snow Castle Dedede seems to have taken the bigger brunt of the damage. The piles were even more numerous than from my own fortress – must’ve been from those helicopters I saw Meta Knight piloting. Those were pretty impressive, I’ll have to admit.

Speaking of which, Meta Knight’s head promptly popped on out, followed by Dedede and Dee right after. Meta Knight looked basically unphased by the whole ordeal, while the other two were noticeably more out of it – especially Dedede. Methinks ‘Lil Kirbs did a number on him… and I guess even Bandana Dee has his limits.

Turning my head around, I saw ‘Lil Kirbs and Tuff miraculously laying sprawled out on top of my own ruins. “Oh man,” Tuff was breathing, “that was awesome!” He seemed to be no worse for wear either, despite the fact that I’m pretty sure I saw him in the snowball that crashed into my fortress. Him and ‘Lil Kirbs, too. “We should totally do that again sometime!”

“Poyo!” Huh, ‘Lil Kirbs doesn’t have his Ice ability anymore, either. Admittedly, that’s not surprising, but—man, I kinda wanted to see what else he could do with it.

Maybe I’ll get another chance later during today. I mean, based on Tiff’s intel, there’s probably some sort of inexplicable monster behind this snow season anyway, so that’ll be fun!

“Soooo…” I drawled out, “Did… Did anybody win this? Like, at all? I mean, both our fortresses came down at the same time…”

“Can we just say that I won?” Dedede decided to ask. “You know, kingly privileges and all that?”

“No,” Meta Knight rejected.

“Oh well. It was worth a shot!” he laughed.

“Is… Is everyone okay?” Dee inquired, wiping off some snow from his bandana. “T-That was… pretty chaotic! It was like… something out of a crazy cartoon!”

“But it was cool!” Tuff added. “The castles, the cannons, the cool airplanes!”

“Helicopters, actually,” Meta Knight corrected.

“But still! We had a lot of fun in this fight! I’m never gonna forget it, ever!”

“Poyo poyoooo!” ‘Lil Kirbs seemed to agree. “Poyo!”

“It was certainly pretty memorable, huh?” I said, looking up at the sky. “Even if nobody won… it really was something else.” A little laughter started to build up in my mouth, and I slowly released it out for the world to hear as I lay on my back. “You know what? Yeah. We should totally do this again sometime. With everyone else, too.”

“Oh, yeah! We should totally invite everyone else next time!” Dedede agreed with me. “Adeleine and Daroach would definitely have a lot of fun over this!”

“What about Marx and Dark Meta?” Dee added.

“Oh. Yeah. Them too.”

“I can’t imagine my mirror counterpart joining in such an event, though,” Meta Knight mused. “He always sees fit to keep himself even more serious and no-nonsense that I do; quite the accomplishment, that.”

“Eh, I guess we could get Marx to bug him into it,” Dedede offered. “…though I think having Marx in it would be a little more trouble than its worth.”

“Hey, who cares?” I vocalized, already imagining the scene in my mind. All of our friends, participating in one truly epic snowball fight to rival the ages? I couldn’t wait for a day where we could actually do it. “Something tells me it’d be a fight worth participating in, anyway.”

“I dunno who any of those people are,” Tuff chimed in—yeah, not surprised, we haven’t mentioned them a lot—“but I’d love to be in that one, too! Right, Kirby?”

“Poyo!”

Everyone just started laughing alongside me, just plopping down into the snow and relaxing after the crazy battle we just had. I mean, how could we not? We were a little exhausted! But, well, we had fun, like Tuff said, and… that’s what matters the most, I think.

I’m glad that Other Dedede (probably) managed to cause this snow season. It also made me glad that we got sent here, to this Pop Star, so we could get to do stuff like this right now. Even if we have stuff like White Wafers – which is eternally winter, by the way – back home, it really doesn’t compare to the atmosphere of an actual winter right in your backyard. Something like this just feels… so much more natural, y’know?

And there’s a lot more to come, I can tell.

Who knows what else today will bring?

I’m eager to find out!