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If pressed to answer how he’d gotten to the top of the Avengers’ list of preferred babysitters/dog watchers, Peter’s not too sure he’d know what to say.
It definitely started with Tony Stark digging up a world’s worth of dirt on him. It definitely had to do with Tony Stark approaching him and asking him to play tutor for the Winter Soldier’s daughter. It maybe had to do with Peter being willing to protect Yana when the Asgardians had landed their ship at the Avengers compound and no-one recognized them yet. It maybe had to do with Steve training him and Bucky very reluctantly beginning to trust him and Yana starting to call him ‘Uncle Peter’. It had something to do with Pepper being called to Beijing for a last minute emergency meeting, and Pressing Superhero Business calling all of the Avengers away from the compound for an indeterminate amount of time. It had something to do with Peter’s unassuming apartment in Queens being safer than an empty compound with the Avengers’ name plastered all over it, in case someone got ideas with the entire team very publicly not at the compound. It had a little to do with Aunt May pulling two double shifts that weekend and electing to just sleep at the hospital, so Peter wasn’t too worried about worrying her. It had something to do with the fact that the Avengers all considered Peter family. He is the only person that Bucky would trust with his daughter who isn’t in Wakanda.
The dog watching thing was less of a concern for everyone involved. Lucky is not a picky dog, and he is very resourceful, for a big dumb baby.
Lucky is, at his core, well and truly an Avenger.
He’s also tracking mud all over Peter’s apartment.
It’s sixty-five and sunny outside. There’s no way that the dog should be this dirty. Peter’s gonna lose it and it’s only been about two hours.
He’s just finished cleaning up Lucky’s muddy pawprints and setting out a bowl of water for him when someone buzzes to be let into the building and Peter’s attention snaps to the door, even though he knows there’s no one behind it yet.
“Who’s here?” Yana asks, way too loudly, and Peter jumps at the sudden noise.
He has… no idea.
Over the intercom, he asks the same question Yana had asked.
“Who’s here?”
“Dude,” Peter hears, and that’s Ned’s voice and, oh shit . “Tell me you didn’t forget.”
Peter had forgotten.
“Parker,” comes another voice, and that’s MJ and Peter’s so dead. “Did you forget?”
“No?” Peter squeaks.
“He forgot,” a third voice comes, and Peter had forgotten that even more. Their physics final project, that they were meant to be working on all weekend, had been assigned in groups of four.
So here’s Peter, with a dog and a seven-year-old child that are not his in his apartment, with people trying to come up to be in that apartment with him and them and Peter’s freaking out.
“Gonna let us up Parker?” the third voice says again, and Peter almost says no, because, while MJ and Ned know about Yana and Lucky and his connection to the Avengers, and him being Spiderman, Kate Bishop from Physics class most definitely does not .
“Hang on a sec!” Peter calls, and spins around in a circle and makes a panicked noise, and looks to Lucky for help and Lucky just looks at him with his tongue lolling out of his mouth, because Lucky is a dog who cannot offer Peter any meaningful advice. Peter sighs, and hangs his head in defeat, and buzzes them into the building.
The knock that comes a few minutes later makes Peter jump, and before he can even move, Yana is bolting across the room to get the door.
“Hi! Who are you?” Yana asks.
“Parker?” MJ calls in alarm. Peter could almost laugh at that, if he weren’t freaking out so much. Lucky very unhelpfully barks from his place on the floor, where he is watching Peter panic with disinterest in his big brown eyes. Peter scowls at him before darting forward to pull Yana out of the doorway. She returns to her
“Hey, guys! That was Yana. I’m babysitting. I’m sorry, I forgot we were doing this today.”
Ned opens his mouth and Peter glares and Ned shuts his mouth.
“Holy shit,” Kate says, and Peter winces, “She’s the kid from the news. That’s the Winter Soldier’s kid. What the hell are you doing with the Winter Soldier’s kid in your apartment?”
“It’s uh. It’s the, uh, the Stark Internship, you know? The Avengers, they trust me, I guess, cause I spent a lot of time around them last summer and I still go back and forth on weekends sometimes cause of the work I do with Mr. Stark? And you know, they all got called away this weekend for something they couldn’t tell me.” Something that Spiderman knows but Peter Parker most certainly does not. “So Sergeant Barnes asked me to watch her, cause no one else was available.” Because they all trusted Spiderman more than anyone else they could’ve called up on such short notice, and babysitter is not in Dr. Nadia Holloway’s job description and they didn’t want to ask her. “She’s a sweet kid. She’ll keep to herself, mostly, if you guys still want to try to bang this out now.”
MJ and Ned look at Peter like they both think he should’ve come up with a better lie. Kate just raises an eyebrow and gives a slight frown before shrugging.
Lucky barks then, and everyone jumps.
“Really?” Peter says, giving the dog a disparaging look. Lucky whines pathetically and Peter swears that Lucky smiles at him, the smug little shit. “That’s Lucky. He’s Hawkeye’s dog. I’m watching him for the weekend too. He’s also fine, just don’t leave any pizza lying around, cause he will eat it.”
Kate pulls a face that Peter would like some time to decipher, but he doesn’t get that time, because at that moment, Lucky decides that Yana’s crayons are a good snack, and Yana raises a hand to smack him away and Peter has to intervene before that situation turns south.
“Hey! What’s the rule?” Peter says, and Yana sheepishly lowers her hand. “That’s what I thought. Be nice to Lucky. Even when he’s…” and then Lucky coughs and spits up three chewed up crayons on the carpet and Peter closes his eyes and sighs and then looks towards the heavens, because someone up there is absolutely conspiring against him. Maybe it’s Loki. Loki would definitely do something like this. He turned Peter’s hair blue the last time Peter saw him. “Even when he’s eating your crayons. Look, kiddo, we’ll go out and get you a new box of crayons later, okay? But for now, these are my friends. Ned and MJ and Kate. You’ve seen Ned and MJ--”
“On the computer before! When you stayed with me and Dad and Uncle Clint and Captain Steve!” Yana interrupts excitedly.
“Yeah! You remember?”
Yana nods and Ned beams. MJ regards Yana carefully, and Yana meets her gaze with a calm, level one of her own, and Peter could almost laugh at this stare down between his friend and a seven-year-old. He does not, but that takes a lot of effort. Ned snickers and hides his mouth with a hand to try to conceal it. Kate looks between the girls like they’re both crazy. Lucky barks and licks MJ’s hand. MJ nods once, and Yana mimics the action with sincere severity. MJ gives Yana a genuine smile and sits down on the floor next to her and picks up a crayon, takes a piece of paper and begins to draw.
“The kid’s helping us with the project,” MJ declares, and Ned smiles and Kate furrows her brow and Yana beams.
“Awesome,” Ned whispers. He drops his bag to the floor next to MJ’s and takes a seat on the couch behind her. Kate shrugs, seemingly accepting that this is just what they’re doing, and sits on the other end of the couch.
They get to work, Peter and Kate putting together the actual project while MJ and Ned continue to draw with Yana, while they spout off ideas and formulas and requirements for the project. MJ spends most of the time she’s not speaking to them locked in a very serious conversation with Yana about the merits of purple crayons versus blue crayons.
A couple of hours into it, Lucky slinks over like he thinks he’s being sneaky, and nudges Yana’s elbow until she reaches back to pet him, and then flops into her lap with enough force to knock her on her back. MJ and Ned both look alarmed, and Peter has a brief moment of sheer panic, but Yana just lets out a little giggle and then a sigh, and stares resignedly at the ceiling while Lucky lays his head on her stomach and licks her chin until she pets him.
Yana makes exactly zero effort to extricate herself from beneath the mass of fur that is Lucky, and after a few moments of watching to make sure that Yana’s okay, they all return to their project.
It takes twenty-two more minutes before Yana sits up, effectively shoving Lucky to the floor, declaring, “Lucky has to go to the bathroom, and I want Starbucks.”
“We’re not giving a toddler coffee,” Kate mutters, not looking up from where she’s finishing typing something into their powerpoint.
“Hey!” Yana complains, and Lucky sits up straight next to her, as though he’s protesting too. Then he woofs and flops his head around like he’s lost control of it, and drops into a playful stance and the illusion of him being serious is shattered. MJ laughs. “I’m seven! I’m not a little kid!” Kate has to cover a laugh at that. “I don’t want coffee anyway. Uncle Tony takes me there to get chocolate bread and smoothies when I’m good. I wanna go. Please, Uncle Peter?”
Lucky whines and puts a paw in Peter’s lap and flops dramatically to the ground, giving Peter the saddest puppy dog look he’s ever seen. Peter swears this dog actually knows what’s going on around him. He sighs and looks at Lucky’s giant brown eyes and Yana’s pleading expression, terrifyingly effective, and groans.
“Alright! We’ll take a study break and take Lucky on a walk and we can stop at Starbucks on the way back, okay?” Peter agrees, taking Yana’s hand so he can lead her to where she’d shed her shoes when she arrived and help her put them on again. Lucky stands with them. Quietly, so only Yana can hear, Peter says, “You’re lucky your Uncle Tony is funding this weekend.” Which he is. Bucky had handed Peter Lucky’s leash, Yana’s bag and Tony’s credit card and told him to keep exactly two of those things safe. The credit card was not one of them. Peter figures Starbucks is definitely on the table. Louder, so the others can hear, he says, “You guys don’t have to come with us if you don’t wanna. May’s gonna be working all weekend, so the apartment will be empty, if you’d rather just stay here.”
He doesn’t want to make them come run errands with him, especially when they’re all so focused on their very important project. But it seems Peter’s concern is misplaced, because the second he stops speaking, Kate’s laptop closing in unison with MJ and Ned’s crayons dropping to the table.
Kate says, very dramatically, almost flopping into MJ’s lap, “I need caffeine. I’ll die without it. Literally die. Parker, do you want me to die?” Peter’s eyes go wide, and he shakes his head, even though he knows she’s only joking. “Good. We’ll come with you then.”
Ned and MJ just shrug and stand, apparently with nothing else to add.
Lucky barks and drops his leash at Peter’s feet. Huh. Peter hadn’t even noticed Lucky leaving to retrieve his leash in the first place. Sneaky dog.
He clips the leash to Lucky’s garishly purple collar (Clint’s selection) without comment, and fits a baseball cap on Yana’s head. She takes the sunglasses from Peter’s hands and puts them on, then, from seemingly nowhere, she produces a second set of sunglasses that she fixes around Lucky’s head. Dog sunglasses.
Lucky seems entirely unbothered by this development. He looks up at Peter expectantly, his tongue lolling out of his mouth. MJ snaps a picture without a word, and Kate nods in approval. She grabs her, frankly enormously large, purse, and slips on a pair of hideously purple sunglasses that Peter thinks Clint would love, and opens the door. Her hands settles on a cocked hip, like she’s been impatiently waiting for them for hours, and MJ’s eyes go a little wide in awe.
And just like that, they’re off, Tony’s credit card safely tucked in Peter’s wallet, Yana’s hand in Kate’s, and Lucky’s leash clutched in Peter’s grip. Kate doesn’t exactly look thrilled about Yana swinging their hands wildly between them, but she doesn’t actually say anything, so Peter assumes that she’s not really all that annoyed.
They walk Lucky to the nearest available green area and let him have some time to take care of his business, and then Peter sighs cause that means he has to clean up after the dog, which is gross , but he doesn’t complain. Lucky waits patiently while Peter cleans up, and throws the obnoxiously blue baggie away. Only once they return to where Ned, MJ, and Kate are entertaining Yana does Lucky begin tugging at his leash in ernest, pouncing playfully towards Peter until they leave the park.
The trip to Starbucks takes far longer than Peter was expecting or hoping it would, because Lucky keeps trying to trip them, both with his body and his leash. He sits down in front of Yana, once, causing her and Peter to stumble. Kate peers over the rim of her sunglasses as she holds the Starbucks door open.
“What has gotten into that dog, Parker?” she asks, cocking an eyebrow.
Peter just shrugs helplessly. He doesn’t know. Lucky’s never acted like this before. He’s always been a perfectly behaved dog, except for the mud he seems to track in every time he goes outside, regardless of the weather. Lucky barks at a man that walks in behind them, and Peter spidey-sense goes fucking haywire . His hair stands on end and the tell tale grating itches in his ears, and he knows something’s wrong. Before he stiffens even slightly, Yana glances between him and Lucky, and sets her face into a very serious expression.
“Uncle Peter, what’s wrong?” she whispers, and Peter shakes his head slightly. He doesn’t know. There’s nothing around them that should be making him feel this on edge, but the spidey-sense never lies, so Peter turns on his heel, and makes to herd everyone out.
“I think we should leave. I don’t know what’s got Lucky so worked up, but he’s usually pretty in tune with his environment,” Peter says, and Ned and MJ take it for what it really means, my spidey-sense is of the charts and we need to get out of here.
Yana doesn’t argue, and surprisingly, neither does Kate, but they don’t make it out the door. Turns out Lucky and Peter’s spidey-sense were correct. The moment everyone agrees to leave, a shot rings so loud it almost makes Peter’s knees buckle, his enhanced hearing working double time to suss out the perceived threat. Plaster rains down from the ceiling where the bullet hit.
“This is a robbery,” a man in all black shouts from near the counter. “Everyone cooperate, and no one gets hurt.”
This man sounds like he’s straight out of a cheesy movie, and Peter would almost find that comical, if not for the fact that the man’s got a gun, and Yana is right there, and he can’t even discreetly slip his mask on, because Kate is there too.
And then Lucky tugs his leash out of Peter’s grip and disappears around the corner towards the bathrooms and Peter would groan dramatically if it wouldn’t draw attention to them, because of course the dog takes off on him now of all times.
As much as he wants to go after Lucky, he has Yana right next to him, clinging to him and terrified, and he can’t go find the dog, when there’s a crazy man with a gun trying to rob a Starbucks of all places.
The man starts yelling at them all to get on the ground and they do, Peter very quietly assuring Yana that they are going to be fine and discreetly slipping his backpack from his shoulders. He notices Kate nudge her purse behind her as well, but doesn’t understand what exactly she’s doing, until she very slowly reaches into the bag, and Peter gets a glimpse of the stock and handle of a crossbow.
Kate catches Peter watching and her eyes goes wide, looking like she’s about to start coming up with excuses, which Peter definitely doesn’t want. If they start bickering, or talking at all, they’ll draw more attention to themselves than is necessary.
He makes a split second decision then, that he’s not certain he won’t regret.
He slips his hand into his backpack, and pulls out his mask, flashing it just enough for Kate to say. “I won’t say anything if you don’t. Cause a distraction?” he whispers, just loud enough for her to hear right next to him.
She nods. Peter very carefully and quietly guides Yana towards Ned and MJ. Kate, faster than Peter can even really follow, taps at the side of her sunglasses, which darkens the lenses, swipes Yana’s hat, sticks it on her own head, and raises her crossbow, standing up with a straight back and a confidence that Peter has to admire.
The gunman turns his weapon on Kate, and she doesn’t even flinch. Her crossbow remains steady, levelled with the robber’s chest. Peter, seeing that everyone has their attention on Kate and the gunman, tugs his mask on quickly, fixing his web-shooters to his wrists, and zipping up his hoodie to cover up his more easily identifiable graphic tee.
He sneaks away as the gunman says to Kate, “And what do you think you’re gonna do to me with that, sweetheart?” in a tone that makes Peter’s skin crawl.
Kate just smirks. “Careful. I know how to use this thing,” she warns. Peter one hundred and ten percent believes her.
He’s still not taking any chances, though, not with Yana and Ned and MJ there, not with Kate quite literally staring down the barrel of a loaded gun. So he quietly and carefully sticks himself to the wall and crawls up to the ceiling just over the gunman’s head.
“And who are you supposed to be? Bitchy Hawkguy?”
Kate scoffs. Peter has to agree. How unoriginal.
“Hawkeye Mark Two, Lady Hawkeye, Hawkette, Hawkess, the Better Hawkeye, Knight in Purple Armor, the girl who’s gonna kick your ass. Take your pick. But if you call me a bitch again, I’m gonna put a crossbow bolt in a place you don’t want a crossbow bolt.”
Peter would snicker at that, but he thinks he hears sirens a few blocks away, and the gunman looks like he’s getting a little twitchy. Time to wrap this up then.
Peter glances at Kate to make sure she’s ready, but she doesn’t make eye contact, which is good, she doesn’t give away his position, though it does nothing to settle his nerves. Resigning himself to doing this without a signal from Kate, Peter waits until the gunman glances towards a hostage who’s trying to stifle a cough, and shoots a web at his gun, yanking it from his hand with ease.
“I’ll be taking that. You know,” Peter says, dropping down to the floor on Kate’s right, “these things are really dangerous. You shouldn’t be waving them around like that. And you most definitely shouldn’t be calling a nice lady names like that. That’s very uncool. You know, what would your mother say about all of this? I don’t think she’d be very--”
“Don’t you go mouthing off at me you little--” the gunman cuts Peter off, moving like he’s going to lunge, only to be cut off himself, when Kate fires her crossbow, and pins the guy to the wall by the shoulder of his sweatshirt. He opens his mouth like he’s going to start yelling obscenities, so Peter webs it shut, careful to miss his nose so he can still breathe. Kate takes the opportunity presented by the gunman’s momentary surprise to pin his other shoulder to the wall too. He makes an outraged noise from behind the mess of Peter’s webbing.
Kate raises her hand silently for a high-five.
Peter obliges.
The first cop car pulls up outside the shop, followed by two more, and for some reason, a quinjet.
Kate lowers her crossbow, and turns to address the people in the shop, as she fumbles for something in her pocket.
“Everyone, please remain calm!” she says, holding up what she had pulled out. It’s an ID. A badge. An Avengers badge. “I’m an Avengers affiliate! You’re safe now. The police are here, and they’ll want to take statements, so please don’t take off. It won’t take long. File outside of the building slowly, with your hands in the air, so they know you’re just civilians, and Spiderman and I will bring this man outside. Thank you for cooperating.” She remains calm and collected the whole time she speaks, but Peter can see the hand holding her crossbow trembling.
And that, of course, is when the man tears his hoodie free of the crossbow bolts, and makes for Kate with an angry cry. Kate almost flinches, half raising her crossbow before realizing it’s not loaded. She scrambles for another bolt, and Peter is about to raise his hand to fire of a volley of webbing, when suddenly, the man is on the floor.
He’s on the floor, out cold, with Lucky sitting triumphantly on his chest, tongue flopping out of his mouth.
Kate lets out a near hysterical laugh, and Peter beams under the mask.
Lucky is the best dog.
Peter approaches him slowly, reaching out to give him an enthusiastic scratch behind the ears before grabbing his leash and leading him back to Ned and MJ.
“That’s a pretty great dog you’ve got there,” he says, handing the leash to Ned.
“He’s the best!” Yana declares excitedly. “He’s a hero! Just like you and Better Hawkeye!”
Ouch, Clint’s going to complain about that one for weeks.
But Peter doesn’t say that. He stands, and lets Ned and MJ lead Yana from the shop with the other civilians.
And that’s when he notices that the quinjet is unloading Avengers .
Peter and Kate rush through the crowd, sweeping Ned and MJ and Yana with them, now that they’ve noticed the team there, and head for the open bay door of the quinjet, just as Steve and Bucky step out of it.
“What in the hell happened?” Bucky demands, the second he lays eyes on Peter and Kate. “Who the fuck are you?”
“Language, dad,” Yana says, but she doesn’t seem too committed to it, instead focusing on getting Bucky to pick her up in a hug. He obliges immediately, and Peter can see some of the tension bleed from Bucky’s shoulders.
Steve speaks up. “Really, Miss, who are you and what happened? We were on the way back to pick up Yana when we heard reports of Spiderman and an unknown mask dealing with a hold up here.”
Kate’s about to answer, when Clint calls out as he steps from the quinjet.
“Hey! Junior! What are you doing stopping a stick up with Spiderman? You’re not cleared for field duty yet!”
“Field duty?” Steve asks.
Kate grimaces.
Clint sighs. “This is Kate Bishop. She’s my mini-me. Started training her a few months ago,” he explains, taking Lucky’s leash from Ned. “She’s not supposed to be in the field yet, because she’s too young.”
“I wasn’t just going to sit by while there was a nut-job waving a gun at a bunch of innocents! Spiderboy needed the help!”
“Hey! Don’t bring me into this! I didn’t even know you were carrying a weapon!” Peter counters immediately.
“Listen, the kid just wanted Starbucks. We had Stark’s credit card. We figured it’d be fine. No one was expecting…” MJ trails off, waving her hand in the general direction of the Starbucks storefront.
“We’re all fine, Bucky, I promise. We kept Yana safe. Lucky kept us safe. It’s all fine. I’m sorry you guys were worried,” Peter says quietly, and that seems to settle everyone down a bit.
Bucky takes a breath, and leans his forehead against Steve’s shoulder. Clint claps a hand to Kate’s shoulder and gives her a tired smile.
Lucky barks happily and hops up to put his paws on Clint’s chest.
Peter laughs at that. “Yeah buddy,” he says, reaching out to pet Lucky when he drops back to the ground. “You saved the day. You’re a good boy. You’re the best boy,” Peter praises, and Lucky licks his face, and Peter finally lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding.
They’re all okay, thanks to the dog.
Peter thinks that Bucky’ll probably never ask Peter to babysit in his own apartment again, but they’re all okay.
He’ll count it as a win.