Chapter Text
“what is it like, to feel?” rk900 asks you, his eyes looking far out. you paused, following his gaze out the window of your home, unsure of how to explain it for a moment.
“well,” you begin. “it’s just a part of life.” he cocks his head to the side. “see, that’s curiosity. you want to know what i’m going to say next, to explain it.”
“impossible.” he says. “i’m a machine. i’m not programmed to feel.”
“you like sweets, don’t you?” his led circles yellow, and you can see blue dust his cheeks faintly. “you like something. you have preferences.” when he doesn’t respond, you rack your brain, thinking of his interactions with people.
“when you finish a case, you feel triumphant. and proud. happy, that you completed it.”
“when detective reed gets moody, or won’t finish his work on time--” an eye twitch from the android, making you laugh-- “-- it’s frustration. anger, a general sense of being done with his bullshit.”
“when… when you spend time with me, how do you feel?” his led turns into an intense yellow, almost glowing in the dim lighting inside your home. when he does speak, it’s so low that you barely hear it over the noise of the city outside.
“different, in a good way.”
-
As you leave work, you find him standing outside, an umbrella already open and ready. He immediately shield you from the rain, and you both walk home together.
“You left your umbrella at home,” he says, and you smile. “It is the least i can do.”
“That’s called caring,” you inform him gently. His led flashes red, and you don’t continue speaking. You walk home in silence, but you notice that he steps a little closer to you afterwards.
-
protectiveness (“why didn’t you tell me you were leaving?” “i’ll walk with you.” “let me, what if you hurt yourself?”).
affection (“good morning, i have breakfast set.” “how’d you sleep?” “you did well today, rest a bit. i’ll finish.”).
playful (“then perish.” “i’ll subject you to my dabbing if you don’t.” “road work ahead?”).
desperate. (“please don’t say that. you’re lovely,” he brushes a hand over yours, and you see real concern in his eyes. when you sigh and don’t respond, the tv turns on without warning, and it plays your list of vine compilations. You both know it’s a temporary solution, but when he pulls you closer into his side, arm draping around your shoulder, you don’t mind.).
peaceful (sitting on the couch, processing the information in one of your older books. when you wake up and find him in idle mode next to you. when he dozes off during your marathon of brooklyn 99, and you get too preoccupied at his vulnerable form. how he trusts you.)
you write it all down, groaning with frustration. rk900 was a machine, but deviant-- not quite, you suppose. was connor like this? you decide to not ask him out of embarrassment.
instead you stand up to go drink some water, leaving it out in the open as you fumble with the schematics of deviancy.
-
when you come home, he isn’t there.
you check around the entire house, worry increasing in your gut at something twists inside you. where did he go?
the answer comes soon enough as he barrels into the living room, trembling and hands shaking as he clasps your arms. “you need to help me,” he breathes out, and you reach out to touch his shoulder, the worry spiking up inside you.
“what’s wrong? why--”
“i did it,” he sobs out, “i broke free, and now they’re going to hunt me down and kill me i can’t leave you --” and it clicks in your brain.
“when and why?” you ask, and he tells you of the times he read the software instability warnings, only ignoring them in favor of watching you be happy, mentioning the notepad and your grip tightens.
“i didn’t understand,” he whispers. “i don’t know what to do--”
“what made you snap?”
“they were talking about you today, and… and insulted you.” his grip tightens, eyes aflame with rage before slumping forward onto the couch next to you. “i-- i was so angry and i wanted to punch him but-- but--”
“it’s okay,” you murmur out, enveloping him in a hug, and he complies. “it’s okay, you’re here, you’re safe.”
and the next thing you know, you fall asleep with him on the couch, even if it takes forever to.