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“It was a February day. When your dad came by, before going away.”
Tony stared out the first-floor window. The ever-busy New York streets seemed to be the only thing that stopped him from reaching his breaking point. Crimson decorations were adorned over every shop within eye distance, Tony's newest least favourite holiday was just around the corner. Valentine's Day. It didn't help that today would be the first time He would meet Steve again. After eight months. For the stupid reason of collecting his belongings.
"Collecting my ass." He murmured. As salty as it may seem, Tony knew that a few pieces of clothing could be easily replaced. He stirred his lukewarm coffee, completely forgetting about its existence for a minute.
"A U-Haul truck in the driveway. The day it was suddenly real."
Tony paused as a truck entered through the driveway. Recognising the large "U-Haul" sign as a signal to leave his seat. Pulling himself together, he watched as Steve walked out of the passenger seat, the driver already preparing the van for whatever he began to drag out. The automatic doors of the truck burst open, causing a small chuckle from Tony, looking at Steve still be surprised by new technology still got some happiness out of him. Might not be much, but it was enough to let Tony forget about a little gremlin.
"I told you not to come outside. But you saw that truck, and you smiled so wide."
Small footsteps echoed through the tower as a tiny mop of chocolate hair bounced down from the stairs. Tony realized who it was when he felt a pull on his sleeve.
"Peter!" Tony whispered. "I thought you promised me to stay upstairs and play with JARVIS?" The pint-sized boy ignored him. Still jumping in his spot, a smile plastered on his chubby face.
"Daddy look! I saw that truck from my bedroom! It's really big!" Peter rushed, completely ignoring how distressed Tony looked. Especially when Steve managed to catch Peter with him. Steve walked in with an obviously fake smile and greeted Peter, avoiding looking at Tony in whatever way possible.
"A real live truck in your driveway. We let you sit behind the wheel."
"If you like the truck so much, why not ask Steve if you can sit in the front?"
Peter's eyes seemed to grow stars with that question.
"Really?! Pops can I?" Peter practically screamed. Joy filling his entire body. It sparked a rare sense of pure happiness between the both of them, something Peter mastered at. Whether he meant to or not. Steve gave him a real smile, one that seemed to reach the ears, before picking him up.
"Sure thing bud! I'm sure the driver won't mind." He started walking back out the exit with Peter in his arms. Tony kept a distance behind, he was Peters guardian now. The seven-year-old leapt into the leather seat, giggling with excitement as he fiddled with the steering wheel. Already asking several questions about what each lever and button did.
Tony was happy for him. Peter hadn't been like this since before the breakup. And both of them understood that. How could he be?
"Goodbye, Goodbye. Now it's just me, and my little guy."
All of Steve’s belongings had finally been squashed in, the driver advising that if they wanted to beat the main traffic, then they should leave quickly. One last squeeze for Peter and he was gone. Tony missed him. He foolishly assumed that he was over Steve 'betraying' him. Yet here he was, aching over him once again. Not that Tony would allow himself to show it. He had to be strong. If not for himself... Then for Peter. The minuscule kid that had won his way into his heart.
"And the house felt so big, and I felt so small. The house felt so big, and I felt so small"
Tony turned around to look at the tower. Before, he was so proud to call it his, flaunting it off at any given moment. Now... Now he felt like he shouldn't have it. All it did was break the physique he had tried to build for so many years. The scale of it finally catching up to him. As he found his shoes clicking on the shined tiles towards the elevator, with no idea what he should do next.
"That night I tucked you into bed. I will never forget how you sat up and said."
Tony settled Peter into his bed, making sure that everything was still there, he could still trust Steve, the delivery guy... Not so much. After his inspection, he kissed Peter softly on the forehead as he lay down eyes barely keeping open. Before he could leave there was a ruffle of sheets from behind him, he turned to see a jolt of energy stir though the boy. Peter's eyes looked like he was about to cry. In a voice no louder than a whisper he muttered.
"Is there another truck coming to our driveway? A truck that will take Daddy away?"
"And the house felt so big, and I felt so small. The house felt so big, and I. And I knew there would be moments that I'd miss."
Tony sat at the long glass table, constantly twisting the pen in his hands, the clocks ticking taking centre stage in his brain. It was currently 2:50. He had agreed with Peter that he would pick him up from school today. However, that was before Fury decided to call the Avengers for a mandatory meeting about God knows what. To say Tony was pissed would be a massive understatement. Fury wanted to waste the rare time he spent with his son, at a meeting? However, he couldn't just leave. It wasn't like his board meetings at Stark Industries. Then he could just pawn over the responsibilities over to Pepper. But he was an avenger as well. And that was important. Not as much as Peter. But still... Reluctantly, Tony picked up his phone and texted Happy to pick up Peter from school.
When he got to the penthouse, Tony was expecting to see a sulking little 13 year old. Hell, maybe even some rage. However, when he arrived. Nothing. Zilch. The kid was nowhere to be seen.
"Master Peter is in his bedroom if you wish to visit him." JARVIS, the ever faithful AI, spoke up. Tony immediately headed over there.
The door to Peter's room opened to the small boy sitting on his bed, quickly tapping away at his laptop as the papers scattered around him ruffled with every movement he made. Tony tapped him gently. Causing the kid to jump slightly.
"What's the big rush kiddo?"
"Oh, Hey dad! Nothin much. Well, a bit much. So the thing is I was sitting in science when our receptionist, Miss Dumler, came in. She said to my teacher that I was needed in the Principals office. So, of course, I'm somewhat freaking out because, why would the Principal need to see me, did I do something wrong, was I being kicked out? It was really confusing an-"
"Pete, sweetie, breathe." Tony chucked at Peter's sudden rambling.
"Oh right, sorry. Didn't mean to. The main thing is. Apparently, that really good school, Midtown High, as agreed to let me have a place next year, but I have to get good grades in my exams. So I'm studying." Peter smiled at his father. His eyes seeming to show a mix of excitement and dread.
"Kid, your exams aren't for another 2 months. You've got time. Have you eaten anything yet?"
"Yeah."
"JARVIS?"
"Peter's status shows high signs of hunger Sir."
"Come on Pete. I planned to order pizza anyway. Take a break and calm down." Peter jumped off his bed and ran into the lounge. Bouncing onto the couch and grabbing the remote before Tony could even get out of the room. He smiled fondly at his son. Yet, the dawning guilt he felt of not stopping him from getting so worked up over these exams loomed over him.
"And I knew there would be space I couldn't fill. And I knew I'd come up short, a million different ways. And I did."
Peter ran through the elevator straight into his dad.
"I got a place!" Peter shouted, grinning from ear to ear.
"Got a place where?" Tony laughed.
"Midtown High! They said my grades were good enough to even get me a place in their decathlon team!" The kid was now jumping around the room.
"I told you they would accept! How could anyone as smart as you not get a place?" Tony high-fived his son. He knew how important this school was to Peter. He would have been devastated to not have gotten a place. Tony was proud of him.
The 13-year-old seemed to grow calmer, but also more troubled.
"Is there something else you want to tell me?" Tony questioned. He doubted Peter could become so different in such a small space of time.
"It's nothing dad. Just... The school is holding a mini graduation for all the 8th graders on Friday."
Tony froze. This wasn't the first time this happened. Steve was out of their lives since Peter was 7. But that didn't stop the small empty abyss within the two of them. Steve was always at Peters shows. Congratulating him for every small achievement. While the kid didn't show it. It was never the same when he left. That bastard.
"And I do."
Peter laid in his bed. Groaning in pain. His senses going into overdrive.
"Come on bud. I managed to get the medicine Dr Cho's team made."
Tony sat down on the bed, handing two round white pills and a glass of water.
"Don't want it." the 15-year-old whined. burying his face into his pillow in hopes to block out the music someone was listening to in the floor below them.
"If you don't take the pills you won't get any better. Meaning Spiderman will have to take a break from saving Queens."
Peter lifted his head.
"Nooo! I still need to get that walnut date loaf from that nice lady!"
"Then you need to take the medicine." Tony ruffled the kid's curly hair and left the room.
"Hey FRIDAY. Tell me if anything changes with Peter."
"Yes Sir."
Tony sat down at the desk of the lab, carrying his head in his hands. He still wasn't sure if the pills the team had made would work for Peter. But it was the best option he had at the moment. So he set himself to work on the IronSpider suit in hopes to get his anxiety to calm the fuck down.
"And I will."
The planet was almost isolated again. With both the so-called 'Guardians of the Galaxy' and Dr Strange being wiped out by Thanos snapping his meaty fingers.
"Dad... I don't feel so good." A familiar youthful voice rang through the air.
Tony shot up.
No, No, No. They couldn't take him. Not Peter. Please just let me have my son.
"You're alright." He muttered. It wasn't necessarily for Peter. It was also a way for him to spark a light in the empty husk of a man.
"I don't- I don't know what’s happening. I don't understand please!" The boy fell into his arms. Boy. Barely 17. Why... Why did it have to be him? Why the last thing that was keeping the weak threads of Tony's sanity together?
"I don't wanna go. I don't wanna go, dad, please." Tony set him down on the ground. Keeping his sons head steady with his hand. Peter's head turned to face him. The once hopeful eyes filled with fear and regret. Something Tony had never wanted to see again.
"I'm sorry." Peter stammered. Tears collecting at the corners of his eyes. Leaving his father as a pile of dust.
Tony refused to stand back up, shaking as everything caught up to his feeble pathetic little mind. His son. Jesus fucking Christ.
He couldn't take it. Tony let the salty tears stream down his face in silent sobs of pain. It was too much. There was only one thing left in his mind.
Thanos was going to die for what he did.
"But like that February day, I will take your hand, squeeze it tightly and say."
Tony stared at his son. How could he think that? Why would he think that? With small footsteps, he walked over to Peter's bed. Crouching down he brushed the fallen brown locks away behind his ears. He took Peter's small hand in his before looking him in the eyes with the softest expression he could make.
"There's not another truck in the driveway. Your dad isn't going anywhere, your dad is staying right here." Tony could hear his voice slowly breaking. Watching as tears spilt down Peter's face, eyes filled with fear. "Your dad isn't going anywhere, your dad is staying right here." Peter threw himself into his father's arms. Shakily holding onto him as he buried himself into Tony's shoulder. Tony let his body hug back, resting his head on the soft curls of his son. After a moment he managed to gasp out.
"No matter what." He lifted Peter's head, wiping the tears from his eyes before softly kissing his forehead.
"I'll be here."