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Though Patrick and he had been dating for quite a few months now, Pete could never really get rid of that little feeling of unease when the other boy wasn't around. It wasn't anything major and he would have felt manipulative had he mentioned it to the guy, because he knew that Patrick would possibly feel bad about it and... It was just overall complicated. Pete was scared, scared of multiple things, scared of his boyfriend finding someone better than him, scared of not being good enough, but most of all, scared Patrick could somehow get seriously hurt out there and he wouldn't be there by his side to help out.
The rational part of him knew how unlikely this was, and also that Patrick was old enough to take care of himself properly, but still, he worried. The other stuff -- he supposed-- came from low self-esteem and/or relationship anxiety and would probably fade eventually, though they'd never disappear. Besides, it wasn't the kind of anxiety that makes you want to throw up, it was simply there. A nagging feeling, like when you go out and can't remember whether or not you turned the stove off, an annoying little thought he could not chase no matter how hard he tried to rationalize things.
He also happened to miss Patrick, whenever the latter was away from him, and though he knew -- he knew -- people like having room to breathe, though he knew relationships of all types last longer if sometimes you play a little hard to get, it was physically impossible for him not to blow up Stump's phone with declarations of affect every now and then, strings of heart emojis and kissy faces. He'd gotten better at it, though, impulse control, all that, he knew all the steps to keep this from turning into an obsession unhealthy for both Patrick and he.
Today he wasn't really feeling it though, no poetic paragraph about the color of Patrick's eyes in the other male's inbox in the near future. He just wanted to lay in bed all day. Still, he forced himself up, reasoning and telling himself he had stuff to do. What stuff? The world may never know, he'd figure that out later, but he couldn't waste one complete day just because he was too lazy to get up. After all, if he got up before 10, there was still a chance of him doing something, and that'd be better than staying in bed until 3pm and then feeling like shit about it.
He pulled on a sweater -- Patrick's sweater, that smelled just like Patrick, he was forever thankful. It also seemed to be softer, but that might just be the fact that it's Patrick's making Pete think so. He was, after all, very biased.-- and finally got out of bed. His room was a complete mess, he chose to ignore that and walked to the kitchen, brewing himself some coffee to kick off his Saturday the right way. His boyfriend was coming over today for movie marathon day (i may have made that up), and so he proclaimed himself chef and started uhhhhh, I'm not sure "baking" is the right word. So anyway, one hour later there was a knock at the door and he rushed to answer, then waited a little bit as his hands was about to touch the doorknob -- wouldn't want Patrick to think he'd been impatiently waiting for him for like.. the whole morning. Finally, he twisted it and was surprised with a hug, his whole face lighting up.
"I believe that's mine..." Patrick said, squinting as he stared at the sweater
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Pete replied with a giggle, "C'mon get in, I made cookies!! To, y'know, eat cookies as we watch movies!" He practically pulled Patrick in by the arm, very enthusiastic. It was very hard not to get excited as well, though Patrick had a feel something would flop.
When they were set and sat in front of the screen, Patrick grabbed a cookie, supposing they weren't poisoned or something.
Wow, okay, what the fuck..
"Did you put... salt in these?" Patrick asked, not knowing whether this was a prank or a genuine mistake.
"No I didn't..." Pete took a bite, almost spitting it out. "Aw man, I guess I did. Are you gonna break up with me for being a terrible cook?" He asked, a little smile on his lips telling Patrick it was a joke, but something about the way he said it made Patrick sorta sad.
"Don't be silly. " He limited himself to replying, locking gazes with the brown eyed male, whose smile faded slowly, Patrick's fingers finding their way into Pete's hair as he kissed his cheek before whispering in his ear " I wouldn't let you go for anything in the world."
Pete teared up a little, hugging his boyfriend real close to himself. He knew this feeling would never disappear and he also knew those words may not always apply. He knew maybe in ten or twenty years, Patrick would have let him go for literally anything or anyone, but right now is what mattered, and right now, those words were just what he needed to hear to make the feeling go away for a little. When he was close to Patrick, he felt complete, like the emotions he always put under a microscope were, in the end, meaningless, and all that mattered was that stutter his heart did every time their eyes met, and right now, that's all that mattered.
Anyway, Patrick has no sweaters left at his apartment.