Chapter Text
Harry Potter and the Honeysuckle Vine
Chapter 1: Reparo
“I think Harry’s right,” said Hermione quietly.
“That wand’s more trouble than it’s worth,” said Harry. “And quite honestly,” he turned away from the painted portraits, thinking now only of the four poster bed lying waiting for him in gryffindor tower, and wondering whether kreacher might bring him a sandwich there, “ I’ve had enough trouble for a lifetime.”
May 2, 1998
As those words escaped his lips, it dawned on him through the exhaustion. His role - the boy who lived, the chosen one, the prophecy - it was over. Voldemort was over. He could just be Harry. He could be normal. But first he needed some serious sleep, considering he, ron and hermione had been awake for about 48 hours.
The trio turned towards the stone gargoyle and were met by Professor McGonagall. Her hair unkempt, all over the place, and her robe torn and scattered with blood stains.
“Hello you three.” she said, surprised to find them here.
“Hello, professor, I just wanted to speak to dumbledore”
“Oh, yes of course, I’ll come back”
“No we’re finished, sorry, we were just leaving,” the three of them started towards the door, Harry turned to Mcgonagall, “but in the next few days I would like for us to talk, if thats ok”
Harry had said it before he knew what he was thinking. He wasn’t ready in this moment but he would tell them all what happened. All of it, and he knew deep down he couldn't do it more than once and so he would tell them all at once.
“Of course Mr Potter, now I need to contact the school governors and certain folks at the ministry, with so much damage to the castle I’m not sure hogwarts will remain open. But that's for another day. Goodnight you three”
As the three of them reached the gargoyle, Harry heard McGonagall speak,
“he’s come so far since we dropped him at 4 privet drive”
“Yes,” the portrait replied softly but with an overtone of pride, “At extraordinary cost, the three of them have done more than any of us could have hoped for.”
--------------------
May 4, 1998
Harry didn’t remember getting into bed, or walking back to gryffindor tower. But by the feel of the sheets and the way the sun felt through the bed hangings he knew that's where he was. He sat up slowly feeling the side table for his glasses. As the room came into focus, so did the weight of the previous days, of Fred, Lupin, tonks, and in some ways himself.
He absentmindedly put his hand to his scar while Ron entered the room.
“Your awake finally” Ron said, half smiling, though it was evident he had been crying.
“Ron, I… I’m so sorry”
Ron stopped and sat on the bed and weakly nodded. “You realize you've been asleep for two days. Everyone’s been getting worried. Ginny is practically besides herself”
“Ginny…” Harry repeated, trailing off, he had no idea what he wanted to say to her, all he knew is he wanted her back, but he thought, how could she ever forgive me.
“So its about to be lunch time, and Professor McGonagall was going to give us an update on if the castle can be repaired, and …..” Ron swallowed, “when the funerals are going to happen.”
Harry only grabbed his own wand and the leather pouch Hagrid had given him. The Elder Wand was inside it. As they headed towards the great hall, Harry didnt even notice that he was still in the same clothes from the fight. Ron hadn’t noticed either. The mention of the funerals distracting his thoughts. Harry stopped about halfway down the stairs when he could hear the murmurs of all the survivors gathering for a meal.
“Ron,” Harry paused on the landing, ”I need to do something outside, let them all know that I’ll be there in about 10 minutes, well it might be less if this doesn’t work, but then I need to see everyone together. You, Hermione, all your family, the order, the ministry, the DA, all of them. I’m telling you all what happened.”
Ron looked at him worried, seemingly pulled out of his imagination of the funerals, “ you sure your ready mate?”
“Yes, I want it over with as soon as possible, and well… people should know why their loved ones are dead.”
“Ok, I’ll save you a seat, but Harry,” Ron started, “You dont need to tell them that ….”
“I wont include you leaving if you dont want me to, Ron, but I think I should, It’s important how you came back…” interjected Harry, slightly annoyed.
“No.. I uh…. Yeah thats… you can tell them but thats not what I was going to say mate.” Ron straightened up a little staring directly at Harry. “I know you won’t listen, and pretty much everyone is going to tell you the same thing but I’ll say it first so maybe you’ll listen to them. Don’t go blaming yourself for Fred, or lupin, or tonks, or colin, or the other however many people the count is up to now.”
“If I had just figured it out sooner.” Harry started.
“No. Stop it.” Harry was taken aback at the anger he heard in Rons voice. “You can’t blame yourself for the dead Harry. Fred, Lupin, tonks, all of them, all of us. We made a choice, we chose to risk our lives, and it wasn’t about risking it for you mate. I know you’re the chosen one and all that bollocks, but that choice is not something you get to take from them. It was about more than you Harry, it was about defending those we care about, about defending this place, about a future free from him.”
Harry didn't know what to say.
“Well said Mr Weasley, if only you were that good with words in your course work.” Mcgonagall chimed in.
McGonagll's voice had pulled Harry out of his stupor. “Professor,” Harry couldn’t meet Rons eyes, the shame too large in his chest. “I want to share what happened, how we got here, with…. “ my family he thought well if they didnt all hate him that is. “With you, and Kingsley, and the Weasleys, the order and the DA. but there is something I need to do first”
She eyed him, he couldn't tell if it was anger or worry on her face, “Potter, you realize last time you said that to me, Hagrid ended up carrying you, dead, out of the forest.”
“It’s over, Professor, I ….” she’ll find out when I tell the story anyway, he thought. “ I need to return Dumbledore’s wand to his tomb.”
The mention of Dumbledore and the fact that Harry had his wand seemed to startle McGonagall. “You need to what?” she asked.
“It will make sense after I tell you what happened, but I need to do this first.” He wasnt backing down, this was the last thing on what had become an exceedingly long to-do list over the last few months. Well, that and find Ginny.
“Alright, I’ll let them know to meet in the Gryffindor common room after lunch, do you want me to come with you?”
Harry considered it for a moment. “I think I’ll be alright…” He swayed slightly but tried to steady himself before the others noticed.
“Certainly, you will be.” She said briskly, “but seeing as you cant seem to stand straight, and didn't seem to notice you need a change of clothes, I’ll come along. No arguments Potter.” She added before he could protest at all.
Harry and McGonagall headed out through what used to be the entrance hall onto the grounds. In turning around, in the full late morning sun, Harry could see just how devastated the castle was. There was rubble and broken glass everywhere. It had rained during the time Harry had been asleep and Harry could see it had started to rinse off the various scorch marks from where curses had hit the castle, some puddles were even a reddish hue.
McGonagall was at his side, also looking at the wreckage. She broke the heavy silence. She gave a sigh. “I don’t know if it’s all fixable considering the kind of magic that caused this, but the School governors are split on whether or not to reopen the school. They want to have the ministry assess the damage officially before they come to their decision.”
“But, hogwarts can’t…” Harry started, a lump catching in his throat.
“Yes, I agree Potter but it’ll take more than a simple reparo to rectify this.”
Or will it….Harry thought. He reached into the leather pouch around his neck and pulled out the Elder Wand. He could see it was cracked, apparently being told to kill its master did something to it. It was a big job, and he doubted it would work. But somehow, Harry knew Dumbledore would approve of this last use of the thing. To make it’s last deed one of healing and repair before it was placed back in Dumbledore's tomb.
Looking at Harry with what she only knew as Dumbledore’s wand she said, “Don’t bother, I already tried to repair a few things in my flat here, it didn’t work.”
Harry ignored her. He held the wand in his palm, staring at it. The wand that tried to kill him. Twice. He then looked up at what had been his first real home. He thought of all the times he had in this place, of first seeing the castle while crossing the lake at the start of his first year, all the memories of being with his friends around the grounds, of going into the forest with Ron and Hermione, of going into the chamber to save Ginny, all the quidditch practices, the DA meetings, kissing Ginny, studying in the library, he even briefly thought of Dobby in the kitchens with Winky.
A lump the size of a football ended up coming up his throat. And he felt some force stir within himself. He thought of how the blood soaked stone and dirt can’t be the last thing this place sees. He thought of Fred and firecrackers he and George set off on Umbridge, He thought of Lupin and Tonks, and now Teddy - Harry knew this is where his godson was going to be educated.
With the pressure behind his eyes mounting, Harry could also feel that force stir, as if it was stretching it's legs like a cat after a nap. Harry steadied himself looking at the massive wreck in front of him. He looked up at the owlery and astronomy tower thinking of Hedwig and Buckbeak and the night they saved Sirius.
He closed his water filled eyes as he felt his heart fill with those memories. He wasn't sure what it was but the force was awake, and Harry could sense the magic of this place and these people. He felt the force seeping into him from his hand, taking up his body. He slowly glanced at the elder wand that had been in his hand. crack was now a full tear, and it seemed to be dissolving into his hand. He thought he heard a slight gasp from McGonagall as he closed his eyes. He wasn't sure he trusted this additional sensation yet. But somehow it was connecting him to the earth, and he could, feel them. It was as if he was both high above and looking though a microscope he saw castle, rubble, the thestrals in the forest, every leaf on the whomping willow, and in the great hall every thread of the hankercheif on Mrs Weasleys cheek, next to her, every strand of Ginny's hair. And he said softly but surely, not even realizing he didn't have a wand in his hand.
“Reparo”
Nothing happened. He sighed, he could feel the force seemingly emptying into the ground through his feet. He thought it would work, he needed it to work, he couldn’t have his first attempt at fixing all the damage he had caused fail.
“Harry, what just happ...” she never calls me harry... he thought as he heard McGonagall say softly as she put a hand on his shoulder and definitely hit a bruise. Harry didn't wince though and as he opened his eyes. He heard it. And from the look on McGonagall’s face so did she.
It was like hearing the Hogwarts Express from off in the distance a slow rumble of a sound. The ground began to shake slightly and as Harry looked around he could see things stirring.
Slowly as the rumble grew louder, small stones in the heaps of crumbled walls started to chatter. Some began to rise.
Harry’s heart swelled and he could sense that the force in him was now around him and more stones rose, now accompanied by bigger stones, roof tiles and statues. McGonagall gripped Harry’s shoulder harder and was staring at the debris rising all around open mouthed.
Those who had gathered for lunch apparently felt the shaking and heard the rumbling. People were coming out of the great hall now surrounded by banisters and tapestries gliding back to their rightful places above them.
Harry saw Mr Weasley put an arm around Mrs Weasley as she cried at the sight. He saw Ron holding Hermione‘s hand and point at books flying towards the library. But Hermione wasn't looking at the books, she was staring at him, with a look of almost fear he thought. He tried to shrug his should and give her a look that asked 'what?'
But then it happened. The air was filled with color as millions of small stained glass shards rose, glittering. It was as if rain from every point along the color spectrum was falling in reverse.
“It’s beautiful” McGonagall breathed.
“No, she’s beautiful” Harry replied without thinking. Because there among the streams of color and the last remnants of battlements flying into place, was Ginny, turning around in wonder. And suddenly her eyes met his, and for the briefest moment he thought he felt a surge of warmth as the ground twitched.
But before that feeling could sink in, a booming voice - not unlike a Mrs. Weasley howler - broke the moment.
“HARRY JAMES POTTER!” she bellowed. Her eyes seemed to flash from their typical brown to a golden honey color, ive never seen them do that, did i just not notice?. Her voice ripped him from his thoughts ”How DARE you! You leave me, broken hearted, and in the dark for a YEAR! You just leave! You LEFT me for a year with the Carrows and Snape, not knowing a THING about your whereabouts! For all I knew, you could be DEAD! Along with Ron and Hermione, and I wouldn't know a thing!" Ginny was yelling at Harry, oblivious to everyone staring. He realized while he was kinda embarrassed the heat he felt was coming from her. no that cant...
"And then you come back! You go and YOU disappear on me once AGAIN not knowing where you were! Then we go outside to find you DEAD!" Ginny was nearing hysteria now. Her copper hair had seemed to change to the color of glowing embers. "Do you know how it FEELS, Harry, to have the love of your life DEAD AT YOUR FEET? Do you Harry? To have your world crashing down before you? Ginny had tears streaming down her face, and she was shaking from her sobs. But she also seemed to ... glow, no... more like incandescence, like hot iron pulled from the forge And Harry thought he could feel that force again, as if it too had just seen Ginny.
Voldemort had KILLED YOU! But of course,” she continued full of fury and sarcasm. Rolling her eyes and raising her hands in an exaggerated gesture. “You were NOT DEAD! You were faking it! But the scare you gave me was NOT FAKE! I was crushed, NO, I was far beyond crushed! And now you come BACK! And you’re standing there ALIVE! Even though you LOOK like how I FEEL. And you think that everything's OK? Well it's NOT Mr. Potter! It’s not!
But before he could think to say sorry she was off, running across the lawn towards the trees encircling the lake. He knew where she was going.
“I’ll go get her” Harry heard Hermione briskly say behind him as he watched her run.
“No, I need to be the one.” He told Hermione. Hermione was giving him a look, he had seen it before in the tent all those months. He had an inkling that then it was about deciding if Harry could be a horcrux, now he knew somehow she had seen the force. He eyed her with an expression of later.
Turning to McGonagall, Harry said twitching the empty hand where the wand used to be “I can do this on my own, Professor. I'll get Ginny.”
She nodded, looking back and forth at the repairing castle and Harry's empty hand.
“How about everyone eat, and then we can talk.”
“You sure you don’t want to clean up first, Harry? Ginny was right, you look awful.” Hermione said putting her hand on his elbow.
“I’ll get clean clothes later,” He looked in the direction Ginny ran, “this is more important.”
—————-
He knew where he would find her the moment she started running.
All that time staring at her dot on the marauders map while away, he knew her favorite spot.
“Ginny?” He said softly approaching a cluster of three trees at the shore of the lake, he could see Dumbledore's tomb a pitch length away on the opposite bank.
“I don’t want to speak to you. I can’t speak to you. Merlin, Harry I’m so angry” Harry heard her say as he could also smell like someone had lit a match
He stood a few arms lengths away. How could he make up for it. Her brother is dead because of me. But haddn’t Ron just said…. the truth, it occurred to him. He’d say it all and then she would leave him, but she would know the truth. Merlin's beard, please dont say no.
The ground gave a slight, almost impercieveable tremor, and the three trees surrounding them seemed to almost sturdy themselves, Harry felt ask though as they did, he felt himself sturdy.
“I know, Ginny, but I’m just going to say some things and you don’t have to say anything. I just…. could you listen…”
He couldn’t tell if she nodded or if her shoulders moved from crying but she wasn’t yelling so it was a good sign to go on. The smell of smoke seemed to linger in the air.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for leaving and disappearing, out of all the screaming when Hagrid carried me to the castle it was yours that was the hardest to hear.“
At this she turned around quickly and faced him. Her eyes flashed that honey gold again. He kept talking to ward off another howler and a breeze rose as he spoke.
“I told you why when we stood here last year. But I couldn’t allow myself to think about a future. I had one goal one single thing, a prophecy to fulfill, and so I couldn’t, it was… how did you put it some stupid noble reason”
He thought he saw the flash of a smile, or maybe it was the light, no it was her hair - it was like blowing on an ember watching it glow and fade.
“I told you then that our time spent together was like out of someone else’s life, well now it doesn’t have to be. It’s over. Tom Riddle’s over, and you don’t have to answer me now but I do not want us to be over. I have missed you more than I thought humanly possible and I can understand if you hate me, … for leaving more than once, for not telling you what was happening…” his voice caught in his throat, “...for fred…”
Ginny opened her mouth to say something but Harry needed to say what he needed to say.
“I’m about to go inside and tell everyone how this all happened. Why it happened the way it did. Why we ended up here, with so many casualties. Why its my fault…” He trailed off the ground seemed unsteady beneath his feet. He couldn't continue, the football in his throat had returned.
He was out of breath. She stood there arms crossed, hard to read. A good five seconds of silence
He could feel the slump happen, like a withering plant. His whole body ached. please, Ginny, just come to the castle
She eyed him, expression softening. Of course he blames himself. She thought. It wouldn’t be harry if he didnt. Why did I yell at him like that? She uncrossed her arms and took a step forward. Only barely noticing that the trees had suddenly gone very still. He didn't notice the trees or her as he was staring at his feet.
She continued stepping forward. He hadn't even changed out of his battle clothes. He was still covered with dust and there were dried pieces of mud stuck to his ripped jeans and t shirt. Ginny felt her insides stir. It wasn't a new sensation. It had happened a few times over the last few months, especially when the Carrows were tourchering her. But this time it wasn't quite the same. It wasn't the firy rage that she had known it as, it was like a volcano was waking, gurgling and bubbling hot but not angry she thought still eyeing his torso, a mixture of scratches and bruises could be seen through the holes. One in particular caught Ginny’s eye. That’s where it hit him.
“Ginny, I … “ he said softly, still staring at his feet. “I understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore but can you at least come up to the castle and listen to what happened.”
She paused and then slowly reached out her hand towards the hole in his t shirt above his heart. The edges of the tear were burnt, and she could see deep purple skin underneath.
“Harry…” she said as her hand made contact with his chest. He didn’t flinch. She could feel her warmth move towards her hand, as if it recognized something in Harry.
Harry look at me She found herself wishing.
He raised his gaze from his shoes to her face as if she had said the words outloud, looking into her eyes, a piece of copper hair caught on her eyelashes. His eyes were dancing between they're typical rich green with when light hits an emerald.
He’s grown she thought now looking up at him. there is something different here
“I don’t blame you,” she started, eyes starting to water but still curiously that honey color. “I… I miss fred terribly, but I can't imagine also having to miss you more than I already did. I always had hope, I know you wanted me to move on and not worry, but I couldn’t give up hope that you would come back, and we …. “
His eyes widened in confusion, the leaves russled. She was going to need to spell it out for him, she realized.
“Harry, I still want to be with you. In fact I can’t think of anything that I want more. I don’t blame you, and I won’t let you blame yourself. You gave your life, literally, if the speculation is true, for us. And I can’t promise it will be easy, or that I won’t yell at you again, but I want to do this….life… together.”
He stared at her. Just let yourself believe me harry. She thought fiercely.
His voiced cracked, as if he had been internally shouting for hours, “together….?”
Oh you really are as thick as my brother. Fine i’ll show you then. She leaned upward, leaving one hand flat against harry’s thundering heart, and moving the other to the back of his neck, she pulled his face towards hers.
“Together.” she breathed as she kissed him, fully, deeply and with all the love she thought she could put into it. The force inside Harry roared, and he could feel the heat from Ginny as it he were holding fire
At first, harry was caught so off guard by both the kiss and the roar, he didnt realize what was happening shes ..... she wants to be with me the thought exploded into his pounding head. He wrapped both arms around her tightly finally matching her enthusiasm in the kiss.
She put her arms around his neck, and felt the fire within her come ablaze, and she thought she could sense that it had responded to a call, but he flinched in pain, he didn't realize he had so many bruises. They pulled apart from one another, though not letting go.
“Come on, Harry, lets get you cleaned up. I can’t have a scrubby looking boyfriend.” Ginny smiled warmly.
