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All I can say about being Handsome Jack’s PA is that it is the most wildest roller coaster of emotions that I ever been on. In the beginning, there was a mixture of paralyzing fear and major fanboying. I mean, who wouldn’t? It’s Handsome Jack for god sake. After a while though, it slowly became exasperated fondness. The man can be a 5 year old with extremely bad temper tantrums.
Said all I want from you
Is to see you tomorrow
And every tomorrow
Maybe you’ll let me borrow, your heart
And is it too much to ask for every Sunday?
And while we're at it throw in every other day to start
Then we crossed the line from PA and boss to fuck buddies. It was like we couldn’t keep our hands off of each other. Don’t get me wrong, we still get our job done...in between all the mind-blowing orgasms. However, I started to see him in a new light. Jack still acted like the immature, murder-happy asshole that he normally is but he would show such a more...loving, the sweeter side that would leave me breathless. My heart would drum against my chest. My thoughts would get jumbled up or plain turn to mush. Every part of me just wants to spend every day with that man.
It was like smacking my face in the wall when I realized that I was head over heels in love with my boss. I, Rhys Summers, is in L.O.V.E. with my boss, Handsome Fucking Jack. I don’t know if I should laugh at the ridiculousness of it or cry from the fact that I’m in love with the world’s most emotionally constipated and guarded man in the whole galaxy.
I know people make promises all the time
Then they turn right around and break them
When someone cuts your heart open with a knife
Now you're bleeding
But I could be that guy to heal it over time
And I won’t stop until you believe it
Cause baby you’re worth it
I understand why he is the way that he is. I mean from the little that I got from him spending time with him as his PA, during the sexy moments, or when we are wrapped up with each other on his couch while we watching movies, he has been hurt and betrayed before. I see it when he is being super protective over Angel. Or times when he doesn’t think I am not paying attention that he would give me suspicious looks like he is waiting for me to turn my back on him like everybody else.
So don't act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me
Cause you might fuck around and find your dreams come true with me
Spend all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free
So don't act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
Fall, yeah
I wish that idiot would get it through his head and understands that I’m not going to betray him nor turn my back on him. That I am not like everybody in his past. That. I’m. Not. Going. Anywhere. That I’m in it for the long haul with him and Angel. Every time that I try to make that known, he tries to change the topic or brush it off like it’s nothing. He is driving me nuts.
Now, how about I be the last voice you hear tonight?
And every other night for the rest of the nights that there are
And every morning I just wanna see you staring back at me
Cause I know that’s a good place to start
Once in a while, he would make jokes about me moving in with him and Angel but whenever I try to express how much I would love to move in. That I would love to lay in bed at night and be the last voice he hears at night and wake up staring right back into his perfectly imperfect mismatch eyes. Once he sees that the conversation taking a serious turn, he uses his normal tactics to get out the conversation. I would sigh and go back to work mode.
So don't act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me
Cause you might fuck around and find your dreams come true with me
He doesn’t know this but he talks in his sleep. This is the reason why I am so patient with this man and continue being with him like this. I get to see what he tries so hard to hide and which makes me try so hard to fight for us. Most of the time it’s about Angel or being CEO of Hyperion, but once in a while, I do get a peak in his past. Not enough that I know everything but enough to know why he is the way that he is. From what I gather is, his grandmother was a horrible person and I can see why he doesn’t have a lot of close friends. Then there are moments when he mumbles about being with me and how much he cares about me. It always makes me fall asleep with a smile on my face.
Spend all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free
So don't act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
Fall, yeah
Jack has a problem with seeing that he doesn’t need to buy my affection. He would buy me super expensive clothes, dinners, vacations, etc. and as nice as it is, I don’t need any of it. It is a real pill to get it through his head that all I want is just his love, his affection and just plain him. My love is free and unconditional for him but he is too stubborn to see that.
No, I won’t fill your mind
With broken promises and wasted time
And if you fall, you’ll always land right in these arms
These arms of mine
I just wish this man would just see that he has me. That I’m his and I’m not going anywhere. As much as it hurts me that he keeps me at arm's length, I refuse to give up on him. I would keep up and prove to him that I am here to stay.
So don't act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me
Cause you might fuck around and find your dreams come true with me
Spend all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free
So don't act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It’s not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
Fall, yeah