Work Text:
Ralph’s hand clasped tightly around Jerry’s wrist, excitement bleeding through his movements. His face lit up by a bright smile and he could hardly stand still. Bouncing on the balls of his feet, he tugged on the other android’s arm.
“Come on! Ralph… Yes, Ralph has something to show you!”
Jerry’s features softened, and he tilted his head a tad sideways. “Can you tell me or…” His lips quirked upwards as he moved his hand so it was holding Ralph’s. Gray peeled back the skin’s previous artificial colour, revealing the full extent of the scars Ralph had there. “Is it a surprise?”
His cheeks tinted blue at the small gesture, eyes darting to their intertwined fingers for a moment before focussing again. “No- No, he can’t tell you,” He took a step forward, gently pulling him along. “Jerry will love it! Ralph- He, he knows he will!”
He squeezed his hand, careful of the other's scars. “Of course,” Jerry gave him a toothy smile. “I’ll be happy with anything you show me.”
Ralph sputtered for a second, the blue glow on his cheeks only intensifying. “Let's-- Let’s go. He’ll show the way.” It didn’t take long before his previous enthusiasm returned, the pace fast with their destination in mind.
Footsteps on the pavement were the only things sounding through these empty streets. The road took twists and turns, however, Ralph chose the right direction without hesitation. Suddenly, he stopped, rocking back and forth on his heels. His gaze shifted over to Jerry, fingers twitching.
“We’re almost there!” Before the other even had the chance to reply, Ralph was walking again, pace much faster than before.
The city’s bleak streets changed into something completely different; green showing itself more and more. Soon, they arrived in front of a patch of grass, flowers blooming all around. Pleasant smells wafted through the air, something his receptors could clearly pick up. Ralph was practically running now, though careful not to step on any of the plants.
At the spot the two of them chose to seat, dandelions spread in the grass all around them. The sun was shining brightly, giving everything an even more ethereal glow. Grass and flowers swayed in the light breeze. Ralph hadn’t felt as calm in a while. Sitting here was basically therapeutic to him, with only nature surrounding him.
The silence the two of them shared wasn’t an uncomfortable one, rather shared awe at the sight. Jerry plucked one of the ripe dandelions, twirling it between his fingers.
“Ralph…” His eyes flickered over to Jerry at the call of his name. “Did you know dandelions let you make wishes?” The other nodded, albeit hesitantly.
“Yes, he- Ralph heard about it but…” He fidgeted with his cloak, gaze drifting back to the scenery for a moment. “He’s never tried it himself.”
Jerry puckered his lips and let his breath escape, the tiny puffs detaching themselves from the flower. “Now let’s hope it’ll come true.” There was something in the way he said it, that Ralph didn’t quite grasp.
“What did you wish for?” Curiosity laced his tone as he watched the small seeds dance through the air, the wind guiding them.
“Close your eyes.”
Ralph blinked, brow furrowing. He opened his mouth to ask why, however, Jerry interjected him. “Trust me.” He reached for Ralph’s hand again and took it in his own, giving it a gentle squeeze.
His gaze avoided Jerry’s for a second, yet he nodded. Ralph did trust Jerry, no doubt about it. That didn’t change the fact how many times he’d been hurt previously, and the natural hesitation because of that. The android’s LED burned yellow as he let his eyes slid shut.
Ralph wasn’t sure what was going on at first, nonetheless, it wasn’t unpleasant. Something soft brushed against his cheek, and a slight shudder traveled up his spine. He peeked, eyes fully shooting open once he realized.
Blue flooded his cheeks, eyes darting everywhere except for Jerry’s face. “Ah- Uh… Ralph- I-” He stammered, pulling his hand away from the other android’s grip and using them to hide his face. “He’s sorry!”
“Ralph…” Jerry’s voice was soft, barely above a whisper. “It’s okay.” He grabbed the other’s hands with his own, slowly pulling them back. He leaned forward, pecking Ralph on the nose.
Ralph felt like he could melt away right then and there, system dangerously close to overheating… But he found he didn’t mind. He hadn’t been this happy in a long time, tears brimmed in his eyes, though for once it wasn’t because of sadness.
“It’s all going to be okay.”
But that could never be true, could it?
Like weeds overtaking a garden, dark thoughts tore through the pleasant daydream from moments before. The harsh reality crashed into him like a tidal wave, making his hands tremble and expression twist. His red LED glowed harshly against artificial skin.
Jerry was the first friend he had in a long time; one of the few people who had ever showed him such kindness. Yet, he dared to think about him in this way… He would never love Ralph that way-- It was simply impossible for him to imagine. Nonetheless, he longed for it; so much it hurt.
He wished to be the center of someone’s attention, for someone to truly make him feel wanted.
The dust-filled air of his ‘home’ was a sharp contrast with the fresh air he had imagined. He was aware of every drop of thirium being pumped inside his body. Ralph could feel the emotions brewing in him, threatening to spill over.
He wouldn’t-- No couldn’t let that happen.
It was never pretty when he lost control; it never ended without regret. The things he’d done… The guilt already ate away at his sanity like maggots, Ralph never wanted to add anything onto that. His body slumped against the wall and sunk down onto the floor. He couldn’t stop himself from shaking, no matter how hard he tried.
Warm tears dripped down his face, shoulders slumped and face tense. His hands covered his face, fingers curling up. Ralph’s nails sunk into the skin underneath; anything to keep himself from going insane. He couldn’t tell whether the liquid streaming down his cheeks were tears or thirium.
The android’s breathing came out shallow and quick, eyes half-lidded as the throbbing from his now opened scar got worse. A lopsided smile spread over his face as warnings flashed across his interface. He pulled his digits back, stained with a dark blue.
What would Jerry think?
He shoved the thought away, instead letting the warnings fill his head and twitches control his body. It wasn’t pleasant; it never was. Nonetheless, it had to be done in order for nothing worse to happen. Ralph would gladly do this if it meant no more fresh blood on his hands.
RECOVERY PROCESS FAILING; TEMPORARY SHUTDOWN IMMINENT
Anything to stay sane.