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“How do you deal with it?” Akutagawa had asked him earlier in the day. “How do you deal with Dazai-san having left?” He asked out of a broken curiosity, upset by his mentor leaving. Deciding to ask the one living person closest to Dazai, for help. He lost the closest thing he had to a father figure, and Chuuya couldn’t fault Akutagawa for asking how Chuuya had been coping with the events at hand.
His breath hitched as he pondered upon a suitable response. How exactly did he deal with this? He just… floated along after Dazai left. He didn’t put much thought into his actions, a broken shell of the man he once was. That was only for a short while until he regained his vigor, returning mostly to his normal state.
“Eventually… you just move on.” Chuuya said in a hushed, wavering voice, threatening to betray the tears glimmering at the corners of his eyes. “It’s hard, but moving on is the only way you can really deal with this.” He bit his lip in rage, how dare Dazai have abandoned him in this state. How dare Dazai still affect him this much. How dare Chuuya still love him after all he had done.
Akutagawa was silent, mulling over Chuuya’s response, refusing to look at him, his eyes flitted around before finally settling to the ground. “I see.” He mumbled out. His stare becoming harsher and harsher. “I’ll… I’ll leave you be now, Nakahara-san.” He said, turning on his heel and leaving Chuuya to his own devices, to wallow in his emotions.
Chuuya sighed and evened his breathing, tears disappearing. He’d cry another time. Dazai didn’t deserve his tears, not anymore.
Never again would he cry for the acclaimed, disgraced, demon prodigy of the Port Mafia