Of course, the first time they say “I love you” it’s far from perfect. They were on a job for a small-time crime lord on an Outer Rim planet, each sent to different locations in a bustling town to pick up some unknown packages and then smuggle them out on a rented ship. Simple enough.
They parted ways outside a market, agreeing to meet back up at their ship as soon as they could.
“Lan-” Han stopped himself, they were supposed to be using fake names. “-tro. Lantro!” He thought it was a good save but Lando was rolling his eyes.
“Yes, Hen?”
“Good luck.”
“As you know, I never need luck. But….thanks, and good luck to you.” Lando nodded, a small smile on his face, before he turned and hurried off into the crowd.
Han’s collection went smoothly and he was almost at the shipyard when there was a commotion. He ducked into a small alcove, hiding in the shadows to watch as a group of angry men waving blasters and shouting surrounded the hired ship.
Worry flooded through Han, he knew Lando’s collection was closer and would have taken less time to complete. That meant he should have already made it back to the ship. Before he could think or plan or move, the men ran off in different directions away from the ship and there was a massive explosion.
His knees buckled and he fell against the cold, hard wall. Everything felt like it was happening in slow motion, the ship burned furiously, smoke billowed above it, and all Han could think of was Lando.
Breathing heavily, Han tried to stop himself from being sick. He couldn’t believe what he had just seen, he didn't want to believe it. The idea that Lando was gone, dead, was so horrible, so devastating, but there was only one thing on his mind - he’d never told Lando how he felt. And now he never could. Han closed his eyes, no longer able to look at the terrible scene in front of him.
——
“Kriff. He’s gonna make us pay for that.” A familiar voice grumbled, annoyed.
Lando tucked himself into the alcove behind Han, peering over his shoulder to watch the ship burn.
Han’s heart thudded furiously in his chest as he twisted around in the small space, placing his shaking hands on Lando’s waist. “You-, you’re alive.” He murmured, in awestruck relief.
Lando looked confused. “Well, yes. I am. Very astute of you to notice.”
Han pulled Lando against him, hugging him close and burying his face in Lando’s neck.
“Are…are you smelling my neck?” Lando asked curiously, as he leaned into Han’s embrace.
“No.” Han lied, awkwardly.
“Liar. You are. Why are you acting so weird?"
“I’m just- I thought-“ Han’s voice cracked a tiny bit, and he pulled away, shaking his head.
“You thought -?” Lando glanced over Han’s shoulder and put two and two together. “Oh. Oh. You thought I was on the ship when it blew. Nope. Saw that lot hanging around, doubled back, circled round and came to find you. Figured you’d be in one of these side streets.”
Han rested his forehead against Lando’s. “You could have messaged me or-“
“I’m fine.” Lando shrugged, as if it was no big deal.
“Right. But I thought you weren’t. I thought -“ Han took a deep breath and leaned back against the wall, he placed his hands on Lando’s shoulders and looked straight into his eyes. “I love you.”
Lando raised an eyebrow, as a smile slowly spread across his face. “Love you too.” He grabbed Han’s shirt and tugged him forward, kissing him firmly.
“How come it took me dying for you to say it?” Lando asked, after the kiss.
“But you didn’t actually die.”
“Not the point.”
“Besides, you hadn’t said it either.”
“Maybe I was waiting for the perfect, romantic moment? Maybe I’d been planning a grand gesture the likes of which the galaxy has never seen?” Lando looked meaningfully off into the distance, as if he was imagining said moment in perfect clarity.
“And were you?” Han moved his head, distracting Lando and catching his eye.
They stared at each other for a few moments.
“You’ll never know.” Lando smirked.