Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Damn it all to Niflheimr. I’m on Vacation!”

Tsuna hisses as he senses the void of energy enter Namimori, despite every single barrier spell and ward he cast around the borders of his town. He knows full well this person, creature, whatever it is, up to no good because few people would dare to enter the territory of mythical mage just for kicks let alone the town he claims for his own.

He jumps out his bedroom window and casting a wordless barrier around his house as he races down the street. He’s sent ahead his familiars to scope out the intruder and sends a message along to the local mage’s council politely asking demanding answers about the Sink running around unchecked and slips on his magi-tech goggles as he climbs on top of a building.

He’ll hang back to observe before jumping into the fray, and connects his mind to his familiars they circle the area looking for the source of the disturbance once, twice and again, and yet nothing immediately jumps out as usual until he zeroes in on a small form coming out of a taxi.

It’s a child, no a toddler, that’s the source of the magical void, and yet something about the baby seems off. If he didn’t know better he’d think he was looking at a Kokiri, an adult in a child’s body… but he knows he isn't. The baby doesn’t feel right, doesn’t act right, and the feeling of wrongness is just too much to belong to a normal baby.

He tells his familiars to hang back just in case and dropping down from his perch on top of a nearby building decides to deal with this problem later. So far the baby hasn’t done anything beyond checking into a hotel and ordering food, and from what he can see of the next twenty-four hours, nothing will happen if he just leaves the baby alone. So feeling like he’s putting far too much effort into watching over a tourist, he heads back home. 

(And if he casts some extra magic to ensure nothing can happen to the town, well, that just an old habit from his days of being an adventurer.)

XXxxxXX

And he was right in the worst of ways as he later discovered a few days later.

The baby didn’t cause any problems for twenty-four hours that was true, but after twenty-four hours he becomes a pain.

A huge pain.

He shows up at his house.

Yet, the news gets even better when he finds out that the baby is here because of his mother and her B.S. that he nearly loses it.

Because he told her.

He told her.

A growl escapes his throat and she jumps as he levels a steely look in her direction.

They’ve had his argument before. School is unnecessary and he hates every single one of those immature little brats and the asshole teachers and nothing she does will make him like them. Still she pushes it.

Even though she knows what happened when he last went there.

She is so focused on him 'fitting in' that she doesn't see anything else he's achieved.

He has a GED, and he has a stable job with good friends. He’s a level twenty class mage for crying out loud, and his magic patents are enough to ensure he never needs to work, even if he never picks up a mission again. He doesn’t need Namimori Middle School and yet here she was ignoring his wishes and—

He forces himself to calm down when he realizes he’s still growling at her. But honesty, she deserved it.  Anyone else wouldn’t dare push his buttons like this, but he and his mother have never seen eye to eye on anything.

Tsuna chances a look at his mother hoping to hear an apology, anything but to his displeasure finds only glee. He feels his temper rising again.

Nana's whole expression crumbs when she sees he's less than pleased, even though she knows he's made his thoughts known about school.

She wisely, cowardly flees the foyer and goes to the kitchen.

No doubt, she'll try and bribe him with food later. Not that it will work. But his mother has never been particularly crafty.

Tsuna fights the urge to run after her and give her a piece of his mind and the house is quiet for a long awkward minute before there's the banging of pots and pans in the kitchen.

Tsuna rubs his forehead.

His mother she may be, but he has lines and she has repeatedly ignored them to cater to her deadbeat husband and the world instead of him. He'll get his own food.

Wiggling his fingers on the side of his leg he sends a short message to a good restaurant he knows before he turns his attention to the home wrecker.

Good grief, even thinking that to himself makes him imagine some sort of affair or something. He seriously needs to get out. He's starting to channel the weird duo and their weird soap opera delusions.

"Follow me," He says crossing his arms and walking up the stairs to his room. If the baby wants to stay in the house some rules need to be set.

Now, preferably before—

A gunshot rings out, and Tsuna doesn’t even blink as the bullet vanishes before it even leaves the barrel. Reborn raises an eyebrow and looking rather suspiciously at Tsuna, as he flips the gun barrel open to check the bullets. One bullet is missing but there no sign of the bullet have left the barrel, it simply vanished. The how's or why's about what happened are beyond the older than life baby, and Tsuna is far too done with the situation in general  to explain why. He didn't invite this tutor in to the house, his mother did. She can be the one to explain why weapons don’t work in the house. He's just so done. If Ren-whatchamacallit person wants to know anything then he better be paying attention, because Tsuna is not going to give him a tutorial.

Namimori isn't for wimps.

Reborn hops from his spot on the floor and tries to kick him instead of firing his gun, but it does nothing as Tsuna dodges by moving to the low table in the middle of his floor.

He is so done with this nonsense.

"Sit boring kid." He says slumping on the table. 

The not-baby frowns and when his second kick fails to land on zombie Tsuna, he eyes him rather strangely.

"My name is Reborn—"

"Whatever home wrecker tutor sent by my mother," Tsuna says glaring at him before he rubs his eyes, looking utter exhausted. He just finished cleaning his room yesterday because his mother threw a fit, why can't he get a break?

"Why are you here?"

Reborn...smirks...?

That's an evil look on a kid, baby, whatever the hell he actually was. 

"So you realize I wasn't—"

"A completely normal baby and are probably here to tell me something I won't like?" Tsuna says far too tired to wait for Boring Born (what was his name again?) to work up his evilness to get to the point. Farore, he thought he was finished with this crap last year. Why is this still a thing?

Reborn frowns. "I wasn't finished. You shouldn't interrupt people." The non-baby demands looking far from pleased. He looks like he wants to take out that strange chameleon gun again, but he doesn't. "Listen when I speak Dame-Tsuna—"

And Tsuna no longer cares about what the baby has to say. It's time the brat left.

No one calls him Dame-Tsuna.

Raising from his seat, Tsuna snaps his fingers and the seat the brat's on strings up. Throwing the brat in the direction of the open window.

It's not magic, he knows that wouldn't work because of the brat's status as a Sink, but simply a prank left behind during one of Kaito's visits...and it doesn't work. The brat simply bounces back using the shape-shifting chameleon to float gently to the floor, looking upset or angry. It's hard to tell on a such a baby face.

"You should be nicer to your home tutor." He says as his chameleon changes into a hammer and he jumps up to hit him.

This time instead of the weapon vanishing, the chameleon reappears on the kid's hat looking utterly confused.

Tsuna groans.

Great, he's reached a new level of tiredness when he starts giving Chameleon's emotions. 

He needs a nap. And dinner.

But mostly a nap.

Sliding into bed, he attempts to get some sleep before his order of food comes, but the not-baby decides this is the moment to start talking about dead ancestors and trees or something and Tsuna is just too out of it to care—wait, what?

"Did you says mafia?" Tsuna says jumping up from his comfortable bed.

Boring smirks. "I did. You are going to be the tenth boss of the Vongola Family."

Tsuna blinks and slowly goes back to getting comfortable. "Hell no...Night."

Reborn grits his teeth and reaches out to his desk to pick a book from to wake his student.

His attempt does about the same as his last two attempts.

"Dinner's ready!" Nana's voice calls up firmly reminding the hitman that he had accomplished almost nothing in the hour he spent talking to his student. He hadn't even addressed anything important like Tsuna's grades or that horrible attitude Tsuna gave his mother earlier, let alone why all the weapons in this house seemed to not work. He didn't sense any kind of flames, but that didn't mean anything. Something was strange about the Sawada House and even with the reports Iemitsu sent him on Tsuna nothing was adding up.

Gripping his hat, Reborn squashed the urge to growl.

Somehow, he had a feeling this wasn't going to be anything like when he trained Dino.

"Wake up, Dame—"

Tsuna growled from his nest of blankets. "I'm not going. Now go away."

And like magic, Reborn felt himself being pushed from the room rather forcibly.

A passive form of sky flames maybe?

He didn't know.

It didn't feel like flames.

What was going on the Sawada Household?

Chapter Text

Nana did not look pleased when Reborn came downstairs alone and she continued looking rather longingly at the doorway all throughout dinner. She seemed convinced that Tsuna would appear at any moment, but Reborn doubted that would be the case. He had seen his student climbing into bed after their rather short discussion and considering how angry he was at the pair of them, Reborn wouldn't be surprised if Tsuna refused to see either of them until tomorrow. Across the table, Nana frowned over her bowl of teriyaki chicken but beyond looking a little upset and perhaps a little annoyed she didn’t go upstairs to try and convince Tsuna to come down.  Reborn figured she knew it would be useless, but the reluctance to do anything, even punish Tsuna for his attitude confused him. Most parents would not have taken such disobedience the way Nana had.

Was this an ongoing issue, or another example of failed parenting?

Reborn didn’t know, and there was nothing in the report Iemitsu had handed him either. As far as the paperwork was concerned Sawada Tsunayoshi was just another talent-less wimp, and yet that wasn't what he had seen watching and interacting with his student. Tsunayoshi had looked him straight in the eyes and refused to budge on anything. He had disobeyed his mother, going so far as nearly send her to tears to get his way before retreating upstairs. It was strange because although everything about his actions should have meant Tsuna was little more than a spoiled brat, there had been a real pain in his eyes.

Something had happened, though what it was and how it came between parent and child was unknown. When Tsuna finally retreated to his room, he wasn't just angry, he was drained and considering Reborn knew his student wasn't currently attending school, the question remained. Why was Tsuna so weary and how did the school figure into the equation?

Had he been bullied? Perhaps becoming a hikikomori? Was there some underlying mental issue?

There were just too many questions and too few answers. 

Pulling his hat over his eyes, Reborn looks up at the ceiling, in the area that would be Tsuna's room, thinking.

This situation was starting to get on his nerves.

He hated not knowing things.

XXxxxxXX

Upstairs, Tsuna himself wasn’t fairing any better. 

He had hoped to nip this little problem in the bud before midnight but it was looking less and less like that it was going to be possible. His information—what little of it there was to gather on the mafia, was not making him feel any better. In fact, it was making him feel very, very annoyed with his parents.

Apparently, whatever this problem was that suddenly dropped into his lap, his father was partially to blame. Tsuna could clearly remember his father being on that sheet of paper Boring babe had shown him, and yet for some reason, the tutor hadn't mentioned it. At all. Almost as if, he was trying to completely distract from the fact his father was involved and it rubbed Tsuna the wrong way.

 No self-respecting group, company, pod, tribe (whatever a group of mafia people was called) would go to a young and presumably dumb child if they wanted a new leader especially if there was living adult descendant. It just didn't make much sense. A child would take longer to train, and teach, it would just be more realistic to put an adult leader in the position and train them up on the job. The fact that this mafia was trying to do the latter rather than the former was suspicious. Something was amiss and considering his mother's family were farmers, it was likely his father was tied up in this mess somehow.

(He thinks back to all the postage cards the geezer sent him over the course of his life.  He regrets not looking into that sooner. Penguins in the North Pole? Who the fuck was he trying to kid?)

He growls and slumps on the low table. He is very tempted to chuck his magic mirror out the window. Maybe he could get away with only answering his mundane phone and emails for a while.

And then he starts thinking of the consequences.

His brain hurts at the thought.

He can’t.

The rest of the gang doesn’t have a phone or a computer and if they can’t reach him, they will come looking for him. The last thing he needs is to explain to the Japanese government why Namimori ended up destroyed by Opion Magic Guild. They tended to get a little psycho about things like buildings and random craters popping up.

Whatever.

Turning his magic mirror so he could see into the reflection better, Tsuna turns one of the hinges, making the image blur before clearing. In the glass, his informant sneers, all teeth, and Tsuna resist the urge to duck for cover as chills go up to his spine. Hiruma Yoichi was a menace to face normally, but sitting in the screen across from him, Tsuna feels a little trepidation. He may have just opened the doors to hell. Symbolically. 

Hiruma chuckles as if he can hear the thought. 

Looking like a young looking teenager with spiked blond hair and razor-sharp teeth, Hiruma had pitch black eyes that ended in points. The features alone probably wouldn't have meant anything on anyone else, but on Hiruma they were striking enough to catch attention. It was enough to suggest Beyondian, but Tsuna had been a resident of the magical world long enough to sense that Hiruma was not, in fact, Satan’s spawn.

Hiruma flicked a switch on his side of the screen and the room around him lit up. 

He looked like a walking advertisement for Hot Topic, with his tight black shirt and jeans, along with his collection of chains and spikes, but unlike the angst-ridden teens currently sporting the same style, Hiruma was no pretender. Anything on his person, he could, and would use if someone displeased him enough to make him forgo his favorite guns.

Hiruma blew a bubble. "What the fuck you staring at, fucking pipsqueak?"

Tsuna rolled his eyes. "I thought that was Sena's nickname?"

"And? You got a problem with that?"

"Even if I did, I doubt that would stop you. But never mind that, did you find anything about that seafood family?” Tsuna said moving the conversation along. If he didn't get back on the topic soon, they never would. Hiruma delighted in causing him grief and if that meant extending a conversation, he would do it.

“No,” Hiruma says with a total lack of sympathy. He completely ignores the exasperated look Tsuna gives him as he shuffles some papers into a small trashcan, seemingly uncaring of the fact that most of them didn’t actually make it in the bin. He’d probably have one of his minions clean it up later. Picking up a pencil, coated in a red liquid (Tsuna told himself it was Ketchup), Hiruma started spinning it, thinking intently.

“But I will. Some fucking wimps tried to lie to me.” Hiruma said blowing a bubble with his bubble gum while the pencil he's spinning turns into dust. “No one lies to me, especially over something as stupid as fucking flames—“

Tsuna blinks at the last bit. "Flames? What flames?"

"Hell if I know. Probably some cheap magic knock-off. But I will find out. Fucking puppet tried to escape me, but I got ways." Hiruma says thumbing through his black notebook. "Screamed about Omerta and families…before he tried to off himself. His zombie will be more cooperative soon enough."

Tsuna felt like ice slipped into his stomach. He knew Hiruma was a bit zealous about getting information, but he never thought his friend would be so callous. Tsuna hoped rather vainly that he was wrong.

 "... zombie...tell me you didn't...?"

Hiruma rolls his eyes. "Fuck no. He thinks I'm some sort of necromancer. He's just deluded. I re-warded the fuck out of the place, and put some fake blood and a pentagram on the floor and he ate it up. Necromancy is for wimps. "

Tsuna considers explaining that it would almost be harder for someone not to assume dark arts, let alone necromancy at this point, but he gets distracted when Hiruma started sliding some papers in front of the mirror. They were blank, but Tsuna assumes Hiruma to be using the mirror as a convenient stand, or maybe he's just tired of looking at his face he doesn't know. But still. He should make a token effort to at least get the poor prisoner some mercy even if he did lie.

“…Wolfram had nothing to do with this, remember?” Tsuna reminds him, but apparently, that doesn’t seem to matter to his former teammate. Anything to do with flames is automatically Wolfram’s fault. Just because.

“Whatever fucking twerp. If I wanted your opinion I'd ask for it." Hiruma says starting to clean one of his guns. He leans back in his seat and starts pulling it apart. "Now do you want that information or not?"

Tsuna lets the insult roll off him. “I thought you didn't have anything on them?"

Hiruma throws him an exasperated glance, looking insulted and annoyed all at once. Tsuna is mildly impressed with how well Hiruma can pull that look off.

"I might not have anything on that fucking seafood family, but I've got rumors and a work up on that dead beat you call a dad. For now." He says tosses another piece of gum into his mouth. Apparently, one piece isn't enough for a spawn of Satan.

 "Go on."

"Apparently word on the street is they've been trying to move into Namimori recently. The yakuza wimps have been causing a stir. Fucking cockroaches. Had to train a couple of them last week." He says apparently sliding his gun back together. He starts digging into one of his desk drawers presumably looking for something. What he could be looking for Tsuna doesn't know. All he can see is papers and the only thing he has to go off on is the sounds coming to the other side of the mirror.

The paper from in front of the mirror is removed, and instead, a folder is pushed through the mirror, re-appearing on the table in front of him as the material re-forms from magical pixels into reality.

Opening the folder he starts pulling out the few pages contained within. His father's name is written in black sloppy kanji written on the cover page, but the rest appear to be cities and countries crossed out multiple time. It starts small with Namimori and then moves up in size. Next is Tokyo, then Japan, then to a long list of Asian countries and then jumps all the way to Europe, where Italy is completely blacked out. It doesn't make sense to him.

"What is this?" Like, what does this even mean? Is his dad traveling, or something?

Hiruma smirks. "Thought you might be interested in this. According to the Japanese government, he doesn't exist."

 Tsuna is completely thrown by that fact.

"What? But that doesn't make sense. He should, he did get married to my mother, there's a copy of the marriage certificate in the living room..." And then it hits him. It’s fake. Turning the sheets around, he starts writing trying to list everything he's ever known about his father and comes up with an incredibly short list. This does not bode well for the problem currently eating downstairs. Goddamnit, what did he get himself into? Tossing the pencil across the table he runs a hand through his hair.

"Anything else?" He says, half joking.

Hiruma’s smile is evil.

Of course, there's more.

"I haven't even got to the interesting part. He doesn't exist in any government database. I ran him across ninety-five fucking different systems and nothing. But this came up." He snapped his fingers and one of the papers in the folder Tsuna had, transformed. Instead of the blank page, he thought it was a list of sentences and a photo appeared. It was a missing report, dated nearly forty years ago from a small village in Ragusa. The picture of the boy was badly blurred, but the picture did have enough similarities to his father to say they might be related.

"Is this him?" Tsuna asks, and can't help but wonder. 

"Bingo, fucking shorty. I took some samples from his currently living relatives and compared them to yours. His parents are your biological grandparents. The results came back a match at twenty-five percent. His parents are still kicking as well as his siblings. If I didn't know any better I'd say your dad pulled a runner and instead of joining the fucking circus, joined the underworld as a peon." He blew another bubble and then popped it, looking bored.

 Tsuna whistled wowed. "That's fast." He had only sent out that information a few hours ago.

Hiruma crackled. "I had some free time."

Tsuna blinked at that. "I thought you were in college?"

"Finished that crap last year. Now, shut up. I'm not done talking."

Tsuna made a motion, like he was zipping his mouth, and pretended to throw the key away.

Hiruma rolled his eyes at the action, before opening his blackmail notebook again. He flipped through some pages, before stopping and laying the book on the table. 

"The Italian government is the saddest fucking thing to exist," He starts off with, looking appalled.  "Nothing beyond the low grade, petty shit peons do. Mistakes all over the place. Nothing covered up properly. If the Underworld is involved, they suck. If some fucking magical flame wimps exist, and apparently they do, they aren't trying too hard."  He says turning some sheets of papers around to show some pictures, somewhat blurred out, and giant actual holes in the middle of the streets. Actual holes and if the time stamp is right, in the middle of the day—

"Is that actually on Facebook?" Tsuna asks almost not wanting to know. Because if it is that is just too pathetic for words.

"Obviously it was. Took it off some tourist account and it wasn't the only one. I had a few men case the place, and there are holes everywhere. I could take over this place in a fucking week and it’d be easy..." Hiruma trails off and Tsuna knows what his teammate is planning.

Crime and cover-ups this bad are bound to be annoying for Hiruma who thrived off telling a lie and everyone believing it because he was just that good. Tsuna rubs his forehead, feeling tired. He almost feels sorry for the country, but considering this whole mess has somehow come to his door, he's not feeling too sympathetic to the Italians and their government.

Hell, if Hiruma does take over Italy, it might just be better for everyone. He could just see it now an efficient government, balanced budget, efficient workforce, and a population that would suck it up because Hiruma would be the president Italy never knew it needed or deserved—

Hiruma grins evilly and slams his blackmail book closed. "And that's all fucking I got fucking pipsqueak. I’ll send you some more crap later."

"Have fun." Tsuna waves and the screen goes black.

Stretching he moves to his feet and walking the few feet to his bed gets under the covers.

Maybe tomorrow will be better?

XXxxxXX

Tomorrow wasn't better.

In any way.

Apparently baby with a gun labored under the delusion that just because his gun-lizard didn't work yesterday, some other weapons might and thus leading to the mess Tsuna nearly tripped over in his room. Honesty, how did that electric wire and bombs ever made it through Hibari Customs, Tsuna doesn't know. He can't even begin to guess, but he wonders at the various amounts of weaponry currently creating a mess in his room. His mother calls him down for breakfast, but Tsuna is wise to her ways, and he would rather jump out a window than sit across a table and get into another argument with her because she does not know how to listen.

Actually, that's a thought.

Ignoring the rather frustrated baby in the corner trying and failing to shoot at him, Tsuna opens his bedroom window and jumps out. The grass is still a bit wet from the morning dew, but it’s nothing compared to that one trek up Death Mountain when he ended up covered in volcanic ash. Or the smell. Good god, the smell.

Shivering, from just remembering the experience, Tsuna grabs one of his spare sets of shoes from under the house's empty crawl space and slips them on. He's got a full day planned ahead of him, and if he wants to finish before midnight he'll need to hit the ground running, metaphorically. Hopping over the stone wall around the property, Tsuna picks up speed, heading in the direction of downtown. He's got people to meet.

A sharp tug against his magic shields makes him pause at one of the intersections, as a floating image starts to materialize in front of him.

Apparently, murder baby decided to try and register him at Namimori Middle and was rapidly becoming confused when Tsuna's information failed to show up on anything. Looking at the time stamp, Tsuna isn't surprised to realize that maybe this is the reason that junior back there was so frustrated this morning.

Well, the joke's on him, Tsuna's way ahead of him.

As soon as he caught wind of his mother trying to force mundane schooling on him, he took measures and had one of his former teammates ensure that it was impossible both magically and non-magically to put him back into school. It was nothing a few wards and some virus coding couldn't take care off. Even with boring babe's status as a sink, if he didn't have the technological know-how, he'd hit walls.

Waving the screen away Tsuna speeds off taking several left turns and two right turns until he finally stopped when he entered a rather small, rather eccentric shop, called Montage towards the center of downtown Namimori. Unlike the rest of the shops in the area, this particular building was flashy and far too upscale to normally be in Namimori, but the owner was an eccentric person, and he did what he wanted. Even if it was something random like put his magical workshop in the middle of a rather small town. To the normal person walking the streets, Montage was a half eccentric restaurant, half retro-chic boutique.

Tsuna waved down one of the waitresses and asked to see the Beauty Collection. Instantly the atmosphere in the boutique changed, as one of the cashiers paused in her work and picked up a phone and started dialing while another flipped a light switch near the door. The rest of the workers scatter through the employee exited looking annoyed.

Tsuna groaned already knowing what these reactions meant.

God, he just waited to talk.

There was no reason for...this insanity.

Instantly the lights faded, and one of the waitresses started narrating through the store's intercom.

"Presenting the mythical, magic man of magic himself, the Beautiful Suzuka himself!" 

The poor lady looked like she regretted every single decision she had made in her life up to this point, and Tsuna didn’t blame her. If he had to introduce a crazy, delusional multi-colored clown every time someone even hinted about wanting to speak to the manager he'd be going a little crazy too. Tsuna resists the urge to just get the hell out of dodge and very calmly takes a breath. And then another. As much as he hates dealing with the idiot, he knows if he doesn’t talk to Suzuka the baby with a gun will still follow him.

But the temptation is there to just leave—

"The beautiful Suzuka has arrived!"

Well, that’s the most terrifying thing Tsuna’s heard all month. “This just gets better and better,” he sighs, facepalming. He forces himself to look anywhere but at the monstrosity of color in front of him—or attempts to. Unfortunately, as it turns out, every single reflective image in the boutique is showing Suzuka. Looking away is apparently not an option. Giving up his meager attempts to not be blinded, Tsuna finally decides to look at the clown and just cover his eyes.

He didn’t get that far, because the clothes are burning holes into his eyes.

"What the fuck are you wearing?" He can't help but ask.

Suzuka smirks, and poses, snapping his fingers, so that one of his minions shines even more god-forsaken light on him. As if he doesn't have enough glitter and gemstones on him already.

"Beauty, brat. I'm wearing beautiful clothes. Why? Would you like some?" Suzuka asks shifting closer and giving Tsuna a rather long, appraising look which quickly changes into one of exasperation. Apparently, his clothes have offended Suzuka so much that he has to look down on them.

"Ugly. But if you like I could whip something up." He raises his hand as if to snap, but Tsuna is only too happy to stop him.

"No, thank you. I came because I am in need of some information."

Suzuka looks intrigued. "From ore-sama? How interesting. Speak brat with no fashion sense!"

Tsuna ignores the jab. "I don't know how or where. But a baby showed up yesterday with weapons. Actual weapons. I thought you might like to know since somehow, he managed to get through the Hibari network. " He pauses a moment to let that information sink in before he drops the real kicker. "And the baby is a sink."

Suzuka's eyes narrowed now very intrigued. "Why, that is intriguing. I hadn't a single clue that a sink was in town." He says and the make-up on his face was starting to crack and burn as Suzuka's temperature rose in tune with his mood. Apparently, he wasn't the only one caught off guard. Someone is probably going to be in pain for this oversight later, but Tsuna can't really find it in himself to care. Caring is sharing. If Tsuna has to put up with flames and gun babies and mayhem, he is damn well not going to keep it to himself. Besides, sinks are one of the few weakness he has. His teammates can stand to do something for once considering how much time he spends cleaning up after their messes, they can do him a favor.

After all, to a mage, sinks are annoying little problems that are difficult to deal with considering most magic will pretty much bounce off of them and then there's fact that this particular sink managed to not only get all the way into Namimori but bring in weapons was troubling. Even if the sink managed to wave off the wards, coming into Namimori should have sent all sorts of alarms off. The fact that Suzuka didn’t know meant problems. Big problems. Likely, this meant that there was a problem with the wards somehow, or there was a traitor in the organization. Maybe more than one.

Either way that meant work, actual work Suzuka was going to have to do to figure out this mess.

Suzuka hated work like he hated ugliness.

Tsuna backed away, as smoke started to appear around the clown. “Your make-up is melting.” He said waving a hand in front of his face. By the goddesses, burning make-up smelled horrible.

And like that the temperature returned to normal.

One of the workers handed Suzuka a towel while another brought his make case. A third worker started chanting a wind spell, no doubt trying to clean the air. Suzuka takes the towel and steps back.

“Excuse me, that wasn’t very beautiful.” He tells Tsuna wiping down his face and gently handing the towel back to his employee before gathering up his make-up case and disappearing into the back. “I will back quickly. Be a patient little magician while I'm gone.”

Tsuna shrugged not really bothered to wait.

If Suzuka needed to powder his nose, he’d let him. He was not going to be the person getting in-between the man and his make-up. It was not the hill he wanted to die on. If nothing else he would use the time to send off some mail. Waving his hand in the air, he re-summons his magical mirror and starts writing. Page after page until he's done. Then he copies out the information in several sets and sends the letters off via magical inbox, and settles into to wait.

Even though he had originally planned to meet his teammates in person, that plan was quickly shot down after he realized that explaining the situation was going to be more time intensive than he thought—

A black blur out of the corner of his eye makes him turn towards the window. It was none other than murder baby himself.

Tsuna sighs.

And now, his stalker has somehow managed to find him.

Well, isn't that creepy?

A chill goes up his spine at the thought. He hated the feeling of deja vu from his newest problem. He already had one stalker he needed to constantly stay away from. He didn't need another in the form of a murderous Kokiri. Pushing his hands into his pockets, he turns and makes his way to one of the dressing room's waiting chairs. He has no idea how long Suzuka will take so he might as well be comfortable.

A  small table appears in front of him and one of the employees from earlier starts laying out a tea set and some snacks. Tsuna is sipping at his tea when the silence is broken by one of the younger employees pointing at the window.

“Is he here for you?” She asks looking at the spot on the window.

Tsuna groans. “Technically he’s my stalker.”

She nods before asking the question, he really doesn’t want to answer. “Why?”

“Because life hates me.” He says gravely. 

And because the lady is made of stronger stuff than the normal person. Her next question actually makes him feel better.

“Do you want me to call the cops?”

He laughs.

He wishes.

Lucky he doesn’t have to wish too long, because Suzuka appears back in the lobby, looking fresh and powdered up with tons of make-up. His eyes burn but at least his…teammate is happy. 

(They are not friends. Tsuna doesn’t have friends. He is a lone wolf. Fierce and dangerous and he must be cool and—)

He feels his hair being patted. He looks up to see the hell of glitter and a face caked on with make-up.

“Stop patting my hair.”

“I will not apologize. Your hair is your only redeeming quality." Then Suzuka looks in the direction of the window, "Though what is that hideous thing in the window?”

Tsuna groans yet again. “That’s the sink.”

Suzuka blinks. “I thought he be…taller.”

Tsuna turns to stare at him. What does height have to with anything? A sink is a sink is a sink. They need to focus on the main problem, not random stats like the height or lack of it in the sink. He turns ready to tell Suzuka that but then remembers who he’s talking to and then figures it’s better not to go there. The more Suzuka is caught up in other things, the less likely he is to murder the baby.

Though now, that he is looking that way Tsuna starts to wonder. Magic doesn’t work on sinks, nor does wards. So how is Boring babe still stuck outside?

“How is that window keeping him out?” He asks curiously.

Suzuka smiles. “Spirit stones. Sinks can’t affect spirit stones, and luckily I have just the talented little stone crafter in my employ.” He points to the lady that was offering to call the police for Tsuna earlier.

Tsuna blinks at her. “You sure you want to work here?” He asks her. “Suzuka lost his marbles.”

She laughs and smiling at him, nods.

Suzuka hisses at him. “How dare you! I am an amazing boss and—“

Tsuna takes a cookie off the table and stuffs it into Suzuka's mouth.

Chapter Text

Tsuna doesn't even bother trying to hide that he's leaving. 

His next destination is the Hibari Compound and if the murder baby wants to try and sneak in, well more power to him. It's not Tsuna's job to warn him about the Hibari's. Hell, Tsuna didn't even want the baby tutoring him in the first place, so not his problem.

Stepping back onto the streets, Tsuna turns to the right, heading into the older section of town. Even though the Hibari's weren't responsible for the creation of Namimori they were one of the main sponsors that helped the town get built. They had originally funded important infrastructure like the schools, and the library and were still highly influential in Namimori politics. Even to this day, they were known to take control of random assets of Namimori and set them straight, like the current child, who if Tsuna wasn't mistaken was currently trying to shape up the rather poor school system that was Namimori Public Elementary School.

Which reminds him, he should probably bring a gift or something. The Hibari's were very particular about traditions.

He thought about it for all of a minute.

Nah.

Weapon baby was still following him, and even if he was a Sink, he was still probably a decent fighter. Tonfa boy would probably like that. That should be enough of a gift.

Stepping in front of a large, traditional Japanese gate, Tsuna raised his hand, pressing on the intercom by the door. After a second, a voice answered.

"Local Business? Or a contract?"

Tsuna smiled. "Both. I only bring quality entertainment, after all."

A second voice scoffed. No doubt one of the Hibari's were listening in. They were canny enough to know, that his reasons for visiting were important.

"And your follower?"

Tsuna smiled, all teeth and no warmth.

"Do what you want with my stalker. He's my gift to you. Though be careful, he's possibly the closest thing to a gun-wielding Tonberry you're going to get on this side of the world."

There was silence after that comment, probably because they were trying to figure out his comment but in the end, it didn't matter because the gate started to open.

Instead of admitting only him, Tsuna noticed that the gate was open for several moments, no doubt letting in his rather annoying stalker. Boring baby could have been literally anyone and they just let him in through the front door like he was the mailman or something.

Talk about terrible security. Or maybe arrogance.

It made his fingers itchy. If Hiei saw this he would have a conniption.

But, whatever, not his problem.

Walking inside, Tsuna nodded to the one servant waiting for him in the entryway and let them lead him inside. He wasn't stupid enough to attempt to navigate himself through the labyrinth that was known as the Hibari household. Greater men than he have tried and failed. Tsuna would rather not end up hopelessly lost. [1]

He had other things to do. He's got a busy schedule of naps planned for the day and this whole mess is getting in the way of that.

Finally, after what seemed after like ten minutes of walking, the servant stops him in front of a random set of paper doors. The servant opens the doors and stepping through Tsuna takes a seat at the only piece of furniture in the room, a low table with seat cushions.  He can sense the older of the Hibari's talking to some other people, likely their minions and it annoys him a little. He impatiently waits for the Hibari's to finish their whole intelligence meeting while glancing at the clock.

He missed breakfast, and besides the small snacks he got at Suzuka's shop, he was still very hungry. Hopefully, they'd finish soon so he can get some real food. And maybe check his emails. He still hadn't had a chance to really look at his inbox since he sent the chain mail update around to all his friends, minions and his frenemies. Heck, if this meeting finished early enough he could probably cut off anything stupid his friends did before it got off the planning stage—

A paper door on the other side of the room opens and four people step through, all wearing traditional kimonos and all various ages. Its was Tonfa boy's parents, tonfa boy himself and that one servant from earlier. The Hibari's took a seat on the opposite side of the table, and the servant served them a collection of foods and drinks. The spread was mostly Japanese tea cakes and sweets but, thankfully none of it made it to his side of the table. Contrary to the random green tea stuff the Hibari's were eating, Tsuna side of the table had western foods and desserts.

Taking a sip of his coke, Tsuna smiled up at the group, all teeth rather than any kind of warmth because now that he was sitting across from the Hibari's he could sense the flames just under their skin. It was close enough to fire magic that he never would have never known the difference had he not known about the existence of flames, but now that he was looking. He could see the difference. Even at this distance from his stalker, his magic was being siphoned off, but the Hibari's flames were unaffected. Their flames were not magic or mana. So by process of elimination that left only flames or some unknown power source.

But knowing his luck it was probably flames.

Frowning at the trio, Tsuna signed.

By the grace of the goddess, he hoped he was wrong.

Gathering his thoughts, he placed his drink back on the table.

"When you applied to be part of the Opion Guild, did you do so with the knowledge that you and your family were lying?" Tsuna said testing them. He wanted to know what they did. Maybe this was just a misunderstanding? Maybe they had assumed that the guild knew about the mess called the 'mafia'? It could be anything.

(Hopefully, anything that did not in any way deal with hiding secrets. Because that would mean so much fucking work. And he did not do work. Because he was still on vacation.)

But even as he looked at the elder two Hibari's sitting across from him. He could feel his hopes dying. Neither of them looked the least bit surprised. At all. [2]

They knew. 

After his conversation with Suzuka, and from what Hiruma had said Tsuna had an inkling that something was up. It was one thing if Suzuka had gotten the information late, or it was delayed by trying to get information from the Hibari, but the fact that many weapons had somehow, someway made it passed the Hibari's made him was suspicious. Plus, add in the fact that Suzuka himself didn't know anything about a random Sink in the town and it becomes obvious that something is up with the Hibari's.

They may not be very magical themselves (or if his suspicion was right, at all), but a Sink's very presence affects everyone, from the most powerful mages to the weakest of mages. It would have been obvious either through any magical kinsman or residents of Namimori what was going on and yet they had told no one.

So that left only one answer.

The Hibari's had likely known about both the mafia and the magical world and tried to hide their knowledge from the guild in direct opposition to their oaths to the guild. Tsuna had known the Hibari's tended to regard everything outside their compound with the same fondness as the plague, but this was well past the line.

Slumping on the table, Tsuna put his face into his hands collecting his thoughts depressingly.

Suddenly the whole stalker baby wasn't as much as a problem as it had been ten minutes ago. For one thing, once the whole mafia boss thing fell though the baby would have probably left, but this, this right here was going to take so much work to correct. And the paperwork! The sheer amount of paperwork made him want to flee. He could just imagine it now.

Counting backward from a hundred he tries to think of happier things and ignore the idiots sitting across from him but its hard. Hibari Senior is looking at him like this mess is his fault, while Lady Hibari herself looks like someone outlawed fighting, and tonfa boy looks pouty. Tsuna can feel his temper rising.

Oh hell no.

They don't get to be pissed, they created this mess.

A crack breaks the silence as ice starts to crystallize on the wood around him. The utter gall of this family is just so maddening. Tsuna didn't care if they thought the sun shined out of their arrogant foreheads, they signed the same documents that every single member of the guild did, and they used its services knowing full well that they were lying.

Only just reigning in his temper (he didn't want to freeze his food), Tsuna leveled an angry look at the trio, specifically the parents.

"So you knew and continued to lie. Repeatedly." Tsuna said more sentence than a question. "Well, I hope you like work because you are going to clean it up—"

"The Hibari do not follow orders. We—"

"Are criminals," Tsuna hissed turning the room cold. "As of this moment, you and your kin are exiled from the magical world. I've dealt with troublesome people, and the fact that you lied so brazenly is going to piss off a lot of people. I've already sent off a signal to the gates. You have twelve hours to collect your people and leave behind anything to do the magical world. Failure to do so will force me and the rest of the guild to act. Now, shut up, because we are going to have a talk."

The Hibari patriarch and his wife glared, fingers inches to their weapons trying and failing to intimated him and/or fight him, but Tsuna was so done with their crap.

Tapping on the table, Tsuna activated one of his quick spells. Instantly, bright, blue lines formed on the floor beneath the Hibari's and twisted and transformed into candles, long and pointy floating only inches from the trio, freezing them in place. If they moved even an inch, they would be stabbed.  And yet of the three, tonfa boy's are merely an illusion. Even though he's angry, Tsuna keeps to his morals. But just in case, it was probably safe to ensure that none of the Hibari could force him into a fight.

He got a lot to go through and not a whole lot of patience so the faster he can get through all the official stuff and then get to his actual problem the faster he can go home.

"Now—" Tsuna doesn't even get two words in before he's interrupted.

Several paper doors opened from behind him and the army of Hibari bodyguards and clansman appeared armed to the teeth, weapons ready and poised at him. Though Tsuna isn’t sure why he’s so surprised. He should have expected this kind of stubbornness from the Hibari. They personified the kind of temper tantrums he had associated with bratty two-year-olds.

When the Hibari didn't get their way, they default to trying to beat the opposing party.

Tsuna sighed.

How was this his fucking life?

Reaching into his magic Tsuna summons more spells tapping into the magic he hadn't had to use for nearly a year. He calls forth the might of water. Its better for him use something relatively weak, less he accidentally squish someone.

"Ars Nova: Comselh."

Drops of water glittered in the light, growing and warping as it encircles and engulfs all of his attackers, trapping them in giant spheres made of water. However, the water was only in shells, so air would still be present but no one would be able to move. It was kind of like looking at the world's ugliest snow globes. Well, if snow globes normally contained one's enemies and not snow, but Tsuna figures no one would care about that. As long as the Hibari groupies couldn't poke him with sharp, stabby objects, he'd count it a win.

Sadly, even though he had figured out how to contain the Hibari's, he still has to mediate out an actual punishment and do paperwork. Paperwork!

Just the thought alone is enough to make his skin crawl.

Glaring at the trio across from him, trying rather fruitless to deactivate the spell, Tsuna starts banging his head on the table. The pain is anything but helpful to his current situation, but Tsuna knows that if he doesn't do something, he is going to crack. First, he has to deal with undesirable weapon baby, and now he has to do something official-ish to the Hibari Family because they decided that rules were for lesser mortals.

He hates being official. It's such a soul-crushing and paperwork filled existence.

"I hate you all," Tsuna tells them, feeling so done with them. "If you had just said you were criminals or mutants, or goddess-damned aliens I would be okay with some of this and I could just punish you all a little, and then life would continue. But no, Suzuka was offended by the lack of information, and people are going to notice, and this is all your fault." He tells them miserably.

He slumps over the low table and summons the official guild handbook searching through the pages for the list of punishments. It takes him a few minutes to dig through the thick rule book but eventually he gets to the section on punishments. And then pauses. Most of them are pretty gruesome, and others are so strange that Tsuna fidgets just thinking of them.

Like, seriously.

Who thought of an eternity of watching paint dry as punishment? 

That was so incredibly demeaning, if not just mind-numbing. Maybe he should bring this up at the next meeting? There was no way this list of punishments was guild-approved. If nothing else, Tsuna was pretty sure this was some kind of prank. They certainly had several pranksters in their guild but—

"I would ask that you release my family." A voice said, as small tiny hands poked into his back.

Tsuna blinked.

Another child?

He was under the impression that the Hibari's only had one child. Unless they lied about that too...

Tsuna had a sinking feeling.

How many more lies could they tell? 

The child repeated the words, this time more fiercely. The prodding in his back growing a little more painful.

Tsuna groans. "Fine, whatever. But no one stabs anyone until we solve this mess." He says snapping his fingers, the water spheres fall into puddles on the floor. The candles surrounding the trio also vanish, releasing them, and although the parents are still glaring at him, neither make a move towards him.

Something about the newcomer has stalled their actions.

Perhaps, they dislike spilling blood in front of an innocent minor? Tsuna doesn't know. They certainly never censored themselves on his account, nor in front of tonfa boy. Perhaps, it was some difference in house rules or something...? He didn't know.

The presence behind him moves to his right and takes a seat at the low table. Tsuna's eyes go impossibly wide. He can't believe what he's seeing. One of the servants idly serves the baby some snacks and tea but Tsuna couldn't care less. Because this new reality is mind breaking.

"Is he your kid too?" He blurts out unable to keep himself from stuttering. (The baby chokes on his green tea.)

There were two of them! TWO! He can barely deal with tonfa boy, and now there are two of them.

Why?! Was this some sort of punishment? This is completely unfair.

"I hate you in the weirdest way I've ever hated anyone," Tsuna snaps at the only two adults at the table, he's feeling unfairly beset on all sides. "Having one kid wasn't enough, you had to inflict two of them on me. Two of them."

He takes back any thought of sympathy he had for the pair because this entire mess is utter crap, and he hates everything. He just knows if something happens to the pair, he'll be the one to deal with the kids, and its a job that he feels very unqualified for. Like ten thousand percent under-qualified for, considering his only options are to send tonfa boy to a deserted island, or some other place far, far away just so he doesn't have to deal with them. His options are not looking good.

Thankfully, though Tsuna doesn't have to start trying to figure which deserted island to sent the two children to because tiny Hibari speaks up.

"I apologize for the deception, but I am not their child." The not-child in a red Chinese outfit tells him and suddenly Tsuna can hear the angels singing. So the kid only looks like the violent teenager? That's perfect. Lookalikes are good. He can deal with lookalikes. Yay for doppelgangers!

"I am Fon, a relative of the Hibari family." The baby tells him placing his tea back on the table. "Why have you ignored the rules of hospitality on clan property?" He continues evenly, his voice changing from amused to angry within a few words. Tsuna can't help but be impressed about the change of tone so easily. That kind of skill deserved props. Tsuna only knew a few people who could pull off that kind of masterful language tone, and most of them are old(ish). Adult-ish.

It makes him look at the baby more fiercely. He notices a red pacifier and the strange maturity beyond the baby's years. That's the second time in as many days that he's been faced with some Kokiri like baby.

Perhaps he's like murder baby? The boring baby had a yellow pacifier if he wasn't mistaken. Was it a symbol of something? A club? A fashion choice? He didn't know. Though this makes another point in the older than he looks tally. Tsuna seriously doubts any baby could sit so perfectly or calm in traditional Japanese format.  [3]

Munching on some food, Tsuna mulls over his next words thinking carefully.

There were just too many unknown variables and not enough information for him to go on. He was missing something, probably a lot of somethings, but from what he could tell so was the miniature Hibari in front of him.

As a member of the Hibari family, tiny Hibari should have known who he was talking to, and the fact he didn't, was odd, to say the least. His identity should have been obvious, even infamous across the magical world, and yet here tiny Hibari was demanding answers. If it had been any of his friends, the tiny baby would be missing limbs, as very few of the guild's members appreciated arrogance or threats.

Maybe he was just confident in his fighting strength? 

But how to test him? 

Tapping his finger to his cheek, Tsuna decides to just come out and say what's going on. "Your clan broke the oaths. If anyone else had been present you would be looking at smears instead of time-outs." He said leaning his head on his arm. He's starting to feel sluggish. Even with the snacks on the table, he was still very hungry. The mana usage wasn't helping either. He had probably burned through a couple thousand calories in the last ten minutes.

The baby's eyes narrowed. His hands wrapped tightly around his teacup. "What oaths? Omerta has been kept."

Tsuna shrugs not knowing what this 'Omerta' is and turns to the tonfa kid's parents. From what he can assume, this 'Omerta' was an oath? Maybe a mafia oath? But what for? Pushing that thought to the side, Tsuna decides to tackle the most pressing issue.

"So I wasn't the only one you kept in the dark." He notes looking pointedly at the older Hibari's. "How am I not surprised?" He says turning back to the little red baby. He grabs some more cookies from the table trying to take the edge of his hunger and ponders how to set this whole situation right again.

So somehow he needs to tell the tiny Hibari that his family has effectively sold their entire family's souls for information and now he and his kin are criminals to a world that he didn't know existed. Perfect. 

Combing his hand through his hair Tsuna steels himself with the thought of ice cream in his future and forces himself to go on. He can't let this matter continue the way it has. Red baby Hibari needs to know what he's been bargained for, and then he needs to punish the family. Somehow.

Well...

Figuring he'd better get this show on the road, Tsuna starts at the beginning. "You said Omerta, correct?" 

Baby Hibari nods but doesn't say anything.

"Than we'll start there," Tsuna said grabbing some more food. "Humans have long held the possibility to be more than mundane. I'm sure you've seen examples of this during your time with..." Tsuna paused, not sure what to call the mess that was supposedly organized crime, before deciding it didn't matter. "...the underworld, but beyond the parlor tricks of criminals, there have long been other groups. Other types of powers."

The baby (Fan? Fran? Farn? What was his name again?) blinks rather shocked at that comment but doesn't interrupt.

"Remember that technique I used to capture the other Hibari and their minions?" Tsuna asks, starting to see disbelief inch into the eyes of the baby. "That wasn't an illusion. That was magic, granted very sophisticated magic, but magic all the same."

The baby frowns. "Not flames?"

Tsuna shakes his head. Lots of people would have things to say if he used any type of flame magic. Lots of pointy, dangerous things.

"Hell no," Tsuna says candidly, "I'm not stupid. Besides flame magic is vastly looked down upon in the Myriad world. It's pretty much a cop-out for wimps."

"Myriad world?"

Tsuna sighed. "Right basics... Okay, kid here's the cliff notes version. The Myriad World is the world of magic. Magic's existence has kept secret from most of humanity through several very important spells, politics, and duck tape.  Guilds exist to keep this magic regulated, and set rules in place. Most if not all major governments know of its existence. Except, apparently for the vast majority of whatever your group is. Here's an example." Waving his hand, he ignored the tension coming from the baby and instead summoned several small spheres of the basic magical elements, letting them float to the center of the table.

The little baby's eyes go wide. Tiny Hibari glances to his relatives, obviously looking for some reassurance that he wasn't being fooled, but was startled to see them nod. Tsuna wasn't lying to him. The reality of this new information was mind-blowing. Tiny Hibari is shocked by the news, but he reins it in as he circles back to the present topic.

"You spoke about oaths earlier." The baby notes looking between Tsuna and his relatives. "What oath's have they broken?"

Tsuna sighs and there lies the heart of the problem.

"Your family joined the Opion Guild, a very elite, very powerful guild that allows normal non-magical people to join, with a number of stipulations. Now, normally these stipulations wouldn't apply to your family, but when the Hibari's joined they joined as a group to maximize the amount of influence they could obtain within the Opion Guild." Tsuna pauses for a second to drink some more soda before he finally gets to the heart of the problem.  "The leaders of the Hibari's i.e. your relatives signed away your rights as collateral to gain access to valuable items and information."

Fon's eyes went wide. "How?"

Tsuna signed. "They used some fancy seal or something. I'm not really too sure on the paperwork, but I was informed that everyone in the Hibari knew and agreed to the terms." Tsuna snaps his fingers again, and a stack of papers dropped to the table in front of the baby. "Flip to the last page and you'll see what I mean."

Baby Hibari scooped up the paperwork and flipping to the last page saw what Tsuna was talking about. There in black and white was the signature of the older Hibari's and the clan stamp. The baby frowned as he saw the letters and symbols against the white pages. It was exactly as the teen said and going off the fact that it was impossible to replicate clan seal brought an uneasy feeling to the tiny Hibari.

No doubt there was going to be punishment. But what? Was there an option for an appeal? Could they appeal? The baby didn't know anything about this new world until a few minutes ago—

"You can keep that copy," Tsuna told him polishing off the last of the western dishes on the table. "Feel free to browse it. As oath breakers, you can petition to restore rights, but not for six months." He reaches across the table to the Hibari's side to steal some snacks even though he hates Japanese sweets because he is just so hungry.

"Anyways, back on topic. In exchange for using the resources of Opion, the Hibari's had to make two compromises. The first was simple. Anything magical or effecting magical people were to be reported to a specific member of the Opion Guild, and the second was that anything they knew Opion had to know as well." Tsuna leveled a look at the pair. "They did not and that means punishment."

The baby frowned, his eyes like glass. "And the punishment?"

Tsuna groaned. "Give me a second." He flipped through the pages of the punishment section of the guild handbook, thinking. While it was likely true that the list was a prank, technically the punishments were approved, but on the other hand, if any of the more stern guild members found out that the Hibari's were given little more than a slap on the wrist there were going to be some problems. So, he needed to find some medium between the two.

And then a sentence in the guild book caught his eyes and a decision was made.

"So before I tell you all what I've decided, let's review the case, again." Tsuna tells them. "Because we need to be all official... The case is as follows; The Hibari Clan sighed paperwork and gave their oaths to share everything they knew with the Opion Guild in exchange for information and items. From information gathered by guild appointees, the Hibari Clan has broken both sighed oaths."

Tsuna snaps his fingers and several sheets of papers floated in the air above him the oaths highlighted in bright yellow light, growing in size until all at the table could easily read the words present. Tsuna waves his hand again the papers land on the table.

"Now, then with everything from the official script out of the way, here is my ruling."

"In accordance of the Opion Guild's policies, the following measures will be taken; Half of all Hibari Clan's holdings will be confiscated and added to the charitable funds of Opion, and the entirely of the Hibari Family will remain under the preview of Lord Grim and his team for the same amount of time as the Hibari Clan as been a part of the Guild." Tsuna turned to start flipping through the pages of the forms. "So six years, and in addition even after time is served, the Hibari Clan will no longer be able to access information, abilities or items over level two. " Tsuna pauses to take a breath because by the end of it he is dying. Why this all needed to said  and why it had to be said in this way is beyond him but its done. He give the Hibari bunch exactly five minutes to air their grievances on his decision before he decides to wrap it up with the final list of consequences.

Snapping his fingers Tsuna silences the room so he can finally finish. 

"Failure to comply with the current punishment will result in the mass extinction of all adult members of the Hibari family and until the current members of Team Happy arrive no member of the Hibari Clan will leave Namimori. If anyone member is found outside of this town their lives will be forfeit. This is your first, last and only warning. " Tsuna tells them pointedly looking at the Hibari parents, both of whom look ready to throw down. Well, too bad for them Tsuna himself is ready to cut them down to size. "I have already notified the current guardian of this town, and as we speak he is letting the rest of the Myriad World as well as the guild know that you and your family are hereby declared persona non grata. Mini Hibari if you would like to appeal, you must visit the shop known as Listened Promise in downtown Namimori. As for now, case closed."

Chapter Text

All fanfictions will be put on hold

Recently a number of my fanfiction have been reported for abuse, and a number of them locked.
I have appealed but my faith and trust in this site has severely been destroyed.
I have written on this achive for a number of years, and now I don't feel comfortable writing in it.
In light of this I am going to take a hiatus and consider my options and whether I will move to another site.
When I come to a new decision I will post again. I apologize to everyone for this turn of events. Sincerely, WWC 9/24/19

February 21, 2020

I'm Back and Writing Again!

Sorry for the late reply! So after much thought and thinking everyone decided to continue posting here, but just in case anything happens you can find most (we're still adding some of the fanfiction) on tumblr, just look for Wild Card Writing.

Thank you, everyone, for all your support, you really made a difference!!!

Wild Card Writing

As a little thanks from me: here's a little preview of the next chapter. (Ignore all the grammar issues, please and thank you)

Preview:

After heading down his magnificent judgment, and relishing a little in the looks of horror on the Hibari clan's faces. Tsuna felt it was finally time to get to the heart of the problem.

His rather annoying stalker.

Waving his hand he summoned the magic mirror from his inventory, and placing it on his table set it to record. Until members of Team Happy arrived, all interactions with a Hibari would need to be recorded and documented to ensure there was no one unauthorized interacting with the family. Still even, with the reality of their wardens waiting for the group, the only two members of the Hibari Clan seem to be paying any attention to him. Though whether that was because they were bored or because they were actually looking at him, Tsuna did know and frankly couldn’t mutter up the energy to care. 

Regardless, it was time the conversation moved on.

"Now that official business is all out of the way, let's get to the real heart of the problem," Tsuna tells them, once more swiping more food from the Hibari's side of the table. He's given up at pretending to have manners at this point, and considering the Hibari's were trying to attack him nearly an hour ago Tsuna isn't going to go the extra mile. His hunger is still a bit cutting, and even though he didn't use very much mana, he burned a lot of energy. Probably around four thousand calories if he was guessing and considering MP regeneration was crap in the normal world. He needed to make up the energy some other way. As it was the food was only barely keeping his hunger at bay. Swallowing yet another rather bland snack, Tsuna takes a sip of his soda.

"Approximately three days ago an annoying weapons baby showed up at my house and said he was going to make me a Mafia Boss. He said his name was 'boring read' or something." Tsuna trailed off in thought. He was never any good with names and now that he had to remember one he was grasping for straws. "Or maybe it was 'brand boring'..." Tsuna muttered trying to make the sounds work while he tried different combinations. 

Across the table, the older Hibari's straightened up and looked at him as if they had never seen him before glancing at each other. Tsuna felt his frustration rise with the actions, because if that wasn't the clearest indication that the violence family knew something about the weapons baby Tsuna will eat his shoes.

Chapter Text

After heading down his magnificent judgment, and relishing a little in the looks of horror on the Hibari Clan's faces. Tsuna felt it was finally time to get to the heart of the problem.

His rather annoying stalker.

Waving his hand, he summoned the magic mirror from his inventory and placing it on his table set it to record. Until members of Team Happy arrived, all interactions with the Hibari would need to be recorded and documented to ensure there was no one unauthorized interacting with the family. Still, even with the reality of their wardens waiting for the group, there were only two members of the Hibari Clan who seem to be paying any attention to him. Though whether that was because they were bored or because they were actually looking at him, Tsuna didn’t know and frankly couldn’t muster enough energy to care. 

"Now that official business is all out of the way, let's move on to the real heart of the problem," Tsuna tells them, once more swiping more food from the Hibari's side of the table. He had given up pretending to have manners at this point, and considering the Hibari's were trying to attack and/or kill him nearly an hour ago Tsuna isn't going to be polite.

His hunger is still cutting, and even though he didn't use very much mana, he burned a lot of energy probably around four thousand calories, if he was guessing. MP regeneration was crap in the normal world, so Tsuna needed to make up the energy some other way. Probably by eat enough food, or if possible, get his hands on a mana potion. Sadly, even the food on the table was only barely keeping him in the red. Swallowing yet another rather bland snack, Tsuna takes a sip of his soda.[1]

"Approximately three days ago an annoying weapons baby showed up at my house and said he was going to make me a mafia boss. He said his name was 'boring read' or something." Tsuna tells them trailed off in thought. He was never any good with names and now that he had to remember one, he was grasping for straws.

"Or maybe it was 'brand boring'..." Tsuna muttered trying to make the sounds work while he tried different phonetic combinations. He knows it was something like that, but the exact word combination was just not happening.

While he’s doing that, across the table the older Hibari's straightened up and look at him as if they had never seen him, before glancing at each other with knowing looks. Tsuna feels his frustration rise with their actions because if that wasn't the clearest indication that the violent family knows something about the weapons baby Tsuna would eat his shoes.

"Was his name perhaps Reborn?" The Hibari baby asked tentatively as his posture tensed and he attempted to look casual, but Tsuna had worked with master liars for close to ten years, the tiny baby Hibari might as well give up on hiding his emotions. [2]

Pushing his thoughts away, Tsuna thinks back on the question as he rolled the word over in his mind.

"It might have been...?" Tsuna answers finally. Figuring it probably was with his luck. After all, how many Kokiri-like babies could there possibly be in the normal world? Probably not many. At least, not many that were also Sinks. That kind of combination would be impossibly rare and be well-known especially because as a rule, Kokiri rarely left their forests. So, a Kokiri Sink would be obvious considering their aversion to nearly every aspect of human civilization.

Snatching yet another piece of plain Japanese food from the table, Tsuna elaborated. "I mean he looks similar in age to you, and he had a shape-changing chameleon if that helps...?"

The tiny Hibari levels a searching look at him. "I see," the baby says. "Can you elaborate more on what happened?"

Tsuna nodded. "Okay, but don't interrupt me. If you have questions, I'll answer them at the end." He tells him and grabs another cookie. "So, after returning home after several years away, I discover a rather annoying brat loitering in town. At first, I thought he might have been a tourist, so I ignored him for a bit. But then he showed up at my house."

The baby frowns but doesn't say anything.

Tsuna had little doubt that he was holding back questions, and was frankly surprised that the baby had actually listened to him. Tsuna knew several people that would have just ignored him anyways and interrupted him with their questions and sent the entire conversation off on a tangent.

"Baby introduced himself. I ignored him. He shot at me with a gun. Long story short, boring babe told me that I'm the descendant of some busybody mafia grandfather that moved to Japan and because there were no other alternatives, I was now the heir to a mafia empire. I think he said it was some seafood family or something. I don't know. It had a stupid name. So, because of this nonsense boring babe has been stalking me, and pretty much being a pain in my ass. So... thoughts?" Tsuna asks finally having polished off every single piece of food on the low table in front of him.

The pair of older Hibari look at him in disbelief, but it's the baby that Tsuna is focused on. Instead of immediately asking his questions like Tsuna assumed was going to happen once he had finished his story, there was only dead silence.

Maybe he had cliff noted it too much?

They didn’t seem confused, but you could never tell with the Hibari’s.

The baby blinks rather slowly, almost as if he was having trouble trying to comprehend what Tsuna was telling him before meekly putting down his teacup. He looks torn, possibly because of all the reality-crushing secrets this one meeting is upending, but it could also be because of the situation his family is in. If you added in this entire mess with the strange stalker baby then Tsuna can't really blame him for being caught off guard. It's an experience finding out about magic, let alone when your family is being punished for breaking the rules to a supernatural world order, he had no idea existed. Tsuna should probably cut the baby Hibari some slack.

Tapping on the table, Tsuna idly sends out a quick food order to his favorite restaurant. It will take a little longer than if he had ordered from a restaurant in town, but the mana regeneration will be better considering that the food is cooked using magical ingredients instead of ingredients from the normal world. Content to let the silence stand for a little while longer, Tsuna starts stacking the empty dishes on top of one another while the tiny baby gets his thoughts together.

It takes a full minute of silence, but finally, the baby starts answering questions. "If you could explain some of the terms you used?" He asked, shuffling his hands into his rather long red sleeves.

Tsuna nodded and reaching into the folds of his magic inventory again, Tsuna shuffles around the bottom, feeling around for a certain set of papers made of card stock. After a second, he finds what he is looking for and drags the items out. He hands one to tiny Hibari and chucks a few to the rest, keeping one copy of the pamphlet for himself, and tossing the rest back into his little slice of the void.

"Now, if everyone can open their pamphlet to page zero, I'll start explaining." He watches as only the baby listens to him, while the rest seems content to simmer in their murderous thoughts, so Tsuna moves on. "Press your hand on this page for a few seconds and then remove it. What the paper is doing is scanning for magic potential as well as authorization." He says illustrating this on his own form before he shows the red toddler.  "It should look something like this." 

SAWADA TSUNAYOSHI

Mage Rank: 20

General Specialties: All

Access: Unlimited

Pages viewable: All

Leaning over, Tsuna watches as non-weapons baby, copies him, and watches as the words form very slowly across the page. He hadn't expected this at all. The only reason why a magical guide might take so long to register a person was one of two reasons. The person in question was under some kind of seal, or the magic in the person was so weak that the guide was having trouble trying to register the person in question. If it was due to the influence of a seal, the guide would simply display the seal and stop, but the guide hadn't.

So that left one other option.

The tiny baby was a mage.

Likely a very weak one, but a mage all the same.

Whistling, Tsuna moved to the baby's side of the table to get a better look.

Hibari Fon

Mage Rank: Lower Rank 1.75

General Specialty: Space Magic

Access: Limited

Pages viewable: 25

Humming at the results, Tsuna shifts back in his chair, both surprised and not by the discovery. It figures that in the most violent of families he's come across, the only member of the family not throwing a temper tantrum would be the magical one. Talk about shit luck.

Ignoring the irony that is his life, Tsuna tells the calm baby to flip to the next page so he can go over some of the key terms and general knowledge about people and items in the magical world because explanations are a thing.

Rubbing his eyes Tsuna started explaining.

"Let's start with what magic is." He begins. "Magic was first thought to be used in...

****

“Any other questions?” Tsuna asks later after explaining what feels like everything under the sun. His question seems sincere, but no one can say he's not whining. Because he is, but that doesn't mean he won't answer questions. He's not a complete jerk. He just wishes someone else was doing this, but that's pretty much been his defining thought for the past ten years so he's not holding much hope. With his luck, the baby will ask about something super complicated so he prepares himself to stay longer.

"If I may inquire more?" The baby starts gently and somewhat in sympathy.

Tsuna blinks at the unexpected amount of sheer pity the baby is giving him. Because feelings being thrown his way by a Hibari is weird. Very weird. But whatever, he'll think about that later.

"You spoke of Reborn being a Sink if I recall." Mini baby Hibari says scanning the pages and sounding entirely like the English Language was going to bite him.[3] Likely, the baby was unused to combining languages and trying to make the words work, which made the baby sound awkward. “Does being a Sink affect anyone else?”

Tsuna blinked at that.

That was a very odd question but whatever, it had been a very odd kind of day anyway.

Pulling a hand down his face Tsuna made the executive decision not to think too much about why the baby was asking this question. “Not as long as the Sink is not in prolonged, close contact with a magical person there shouldn’t be any side effects, but even in the event you or someone you were, the most they would be feeling would likely be fatigue, and perhaps a certain amount of increased hunger. I don't see that being an issue though—”

The door slams open, cutting him off and a very familiar spawn of Satan marches in with two of his minions. The Hibari's themselves look less than pleased with this turn of events but considering none of them, including the baby can move from their seats, because of course, Hiruma insured they couldn't with a very well-timed spell Tsuna just rolls with it. He should have guessed that one of his former teammates was going to make an appearance soon, but of all of them, he didn't expect Hiruma to be the first to show up. He honesty expected one of the Kuroba's or Kudo's to have arrived honesty.

Tsuna really has to hand it to Hiruma, though—he gets the Hibari family riled up in less than ten seconds flat by his mere presence.

“So, this is where you fucking are,” Hiruma growls as he levels a long cold look at the Hibari’s across the table before he turns to Tsuna. “I read that crap you sent to the council. Total crap. Fucking Kunikida nearly died at the amount of paperwork it generated.” He tells him tossing his suitcase on the now empty table and drops into a seat pillow on Tsuna's left while his goons make themselves comfortable by the doorway.

The Hibari’s tense as one, but Tsuna brushes them off because they have been as useful as stepping on a Lego and twice as annoying. Having his former teammate here was a relief. “I figured. So, what’s with the visit? You’d normally just call.”

"I was going to but some fucking shrimp forgot to turn on his fucking phone," Hiruma tells him, looking rather tellingly at Tsuna.

Tsuna rolls his eyes because that is definitely not true. Tsuna knows for a fact he had checked his phone before he left home. Maybe. Possibly.

"Or maybe you just wanted to see me?" Tsuna says knowing he shouldn't be poking the demon brat but was unable to stop himself. 

Hiruma growls and throws a glass vial and a wooden box at Tsuna. "If I wanted your opinion, fucking shrimp, I'd ask for it."

Tsuna catches the vial and the wooden box and is a little shocked to see his meal order as well as a mega elixir. Popping the cork off the elixir Tsuna downed it feeling like a weight was lifted off his shoulders. Mana depletion was such a crappy experience. Feeling less like a member of the undead and more like himself Tsuna opens the lunchbox and starts to dig in.

How he missed spicy food.

He ignored Hiruma dropping his suitcase on the table and digging through it, no doubt for whatever reason he was visiting, and finished up his food. Hiruma would say what he was going to say when he was good and ready, and considering no one else at the table seemed like they were going to break the silence Tsuna saw no need to talk instead of eating.

When he had polished off every single morsel of food in his box Tsuna closed it finally feeling content. Banishing the box into his item box Tsuna settles more comfortably on the cushion and turns to Hiruma.

Hiruma for his part looks pissed off, but because that's his default face Tsuna doesn't feel insulted.

"Fucking finally," Hiruma gripes, typing away on a laptop. "Ready for my shit?"

"Please. Answers are apparently not something I can find here." Tsuna pleads so, so done with the Hibari's. He's been in the residences for nearly five hours and none of his questions have been answered. It is so galling. Especially because Tsuna is sure that now he knows even less than he did before he stepped through the door.

"Oh, fucking really?" Hiruma says grinning insanely. Apparently, Tsuna's exhaustion is showing because his former teammate looks like he won the lottery. " I see these malprgth have been useless. Well, lucky for you I'm here. I finished my investigation on your deadbeat father. He's apparently been working in the seafood family for years and every fucking asshole in the mafia knew his goddamn name."

"What. The. Flying. Fuck.” Tsuna hisses, completely and uttering ignoring the fact that every single of the Hibari's flinched. He had never cursed in their presence but considering what he had just heard they're going to have to get used to it. "That complete and utter waste of space couldn't even call us at least once in a freaking decade, and it's because he was fucking off with the mafia? I thought he was dead because that's the only reason a father would abandon a family that he so loved for thirteen years and the fact that he didn’t make me very, very unhappy." Tsuna trails off feeling just so angry.

He can't even remember being so angry.

His mother constantly talked about his father like he was some Jesus understudy and it just pissed him off. Like how was this his life?

Hiruma sneered, apparently just as disgusted with Tsuna's sperm donor as he was. 

"As much as I want to say that that's it, it gets worse." Hiruma carols coldly. "Read this." He tells Tsuna pushing another, much thicker manila folder towards him.

Tsuna steels himself for a moment, and then gingerly takes the folder in hand, and slowly opens it. He scans only the first three lines before he slams it shut, pale as a ghost and hoping beyond anything that his sperm donor is not involved in that.

"Tell me that's not I think it is. Please." Tsuna whispers feeling his spiritual age rather than his physical age.

Hiruma sighs. "It is. So, move it." He says throwing another piece of gum into his mouth and looking incredibly grim. It was a strange look on his face but considering the contents of that folder, Tsuna can’t blame him.

No wonder Hiruma had waited until he had finished eating before bring this to his attention. Because this was big. He has never suspected that his father, that stupid immature brat might be tied to his current activities, it had never crossed him. He knew that his father was is caught up in something sketchy but this? This was something he had never considered.

Tsuna feels so completely out of his depth, and so incredibly annoyed and angry. 

Taking a deep breath, Tsuna throws his trash into his item box. He'll deal with it later, for now, they should move somewhere else. The rest of this conversation needed to be behind closed doors.

But that left a problem.

What about the Hibari's?

"Fine. But let me figure out something to do with them—" Tsuna starts, but Hiruma cuts them off.

"Don't bother. Angel and Cherri will be watching them." Hiruma says slamming his suitcase up. Motioning to his two multi-colored minions—well, not minions, now that Tsuna knows who they really are. "I sent the paperwork off already. Now, move it shrimp. Time wasted is evil wasted." Hiruma complains taking out some more gum and getting to his feet.

Rubbing his eyes, Tsuna moves to his feet, stretching but feeling a tiny bit better. At least he doesn't have to worry about the Hibari's anymore. Reaching out to Hiruma, Tsuna takes hold of his shirt.

"I refuse to walk home after this nonsense. We're teleporting instead. Now."

Hiruma rolls his eyes but doesn't complain, nor dislodge Tsuna's hand from his shirt. He simply stands still, completely nonchalant as a bright blue magic circle appears under his feet, and the two vanish from the Hibari house and reappear in Tsuna's room. Landing on his bed, the duo steps away and takes a seat at the low table. Tossing the folder onto the surface. Tsuna resets the wards around his house, and strengths the ones around his room before he goes back to the folder and starts removing pages.

It's a large stack with several bundles within, most of them theories and lists, but it's the last stack that has Tsuna's attention. Dated only a few months back, it contained many places in which magical people and non-magical were disappearing. Places that, if Hiruma's information was correct, were owned by the CEDEF. The same CEDEF in which his father was supposedly in charge of. Even if his father had done nothing directly to the missing people there was a good, no a huge chance, he knew something. But god those pictures are disgusting.

"Tell me those weren't taken from the scene..." Tsuna moaning, pale. There were just no words for the amount of blood and guts that sparkled everywhere in the photos. It was like a room filled with confetti if confetti were blood red and soaked every piece of furniture and inch of floor red.

Hiruma rolled his eyes at Tsuna's reaction. "I fucking wish, but since this is my fucking case, I will get to the bottom of it."

His former teammate levels a cool look at him waiting, and it takes a second for Tsuna to realize why Hiruma is giving him that look. Did his teammate actually assume that Tsuna would protect his father against the Hiruma and the rest of the guild?

Tsuna made a face.

Yeah, hell no.

Tsuna wasn't in the business of protecting idiots from getting their due and considering his father had spent years away from home doing who knows what, to the extent that Tsuna thought he was dead all this time. Tsuna isn't going to be fighting any battles on his behalf. Especially if this whole situation does turn out to be his father’s fault.

"So, what our plan?" Tsuna says summoning up some more mana potions and sending out feelers to his network making the motions so obvious that even Hiruma from his side of the table can see exactly what he's doing and who he's sending the requests to. There's a pause in the conversation before Hiruma himself has had enough of the indirect answers to the point that he actually presses on to determine where Tsuna's loyalties lie. 

"You're not going to save his ass? Or deny his guilt?" Hiruma demands arms crossed and eyes narrowed.

Tsuna rolls his eyes because this whole conversation is ridiculous.

Why on earth would he protect that man? Because he's related to him? That's so stupid. Being related to someone doesn't give anyone the right to mass murder. Honesty. Now, Hiruma is being ridiculous. Whatever. The only person who’s going to be sad about this is his mother, and that's because she still believes in her deadbeat of a husband. Tsuna himself is well past that point considering he thought his dad dead for years, and finding out he wasn't, well, Tsuna's not above being petty and if that gets a mass murder off the street, he's game.

"Hell no. I like him like I like the plague." Tsuna says already done with this portion of the conversation. "Can we move back to this case?"

Hiruma huffs at this but does move on.

“This case,” He says looking back at the papers. “Is unique and so fucking frustrating. But thankfully, you are useful and now I have something to go on." He points at a list of names and starts running through them. "These first twenty have been confirmed to be dead at the scene, even with Cloud's brat using his spells. The next fifteen were located, but with heavy mental damage. The outlook is not good and frankly even if most of them recover they will likely not be able to use much if any magic. But it's these last seven that are the real problem."

Hiruma pulls out several sheets of paper at the very back of the pile. “Estrella’s three sons are missing, as well as two members of the Kusuo Family and two members of the Druids. Unsurprisingly, all three families as well as several other groups are very eager for an answer and thus are putting their full support behind solving this case.” Taking out another sheet of paper from the manila folder Hiruma starts writing likely making note of the places he’ll need to visit or the people he’ll need to talk to.

“Once that fucking clown is done trimming his moles, I’ll check up on my minions. They should already be arriving in Italy as we speak.”

 “I see…wait, just your minions?”

“Hell no. Those wimps will slack off. I sent the fucking thieves to make sure no one slacks off.”

“That’s good…” Tsuna nods, before the words sinking in. “Wait, tell me you didn’t—”

“Send two chaotic people to a country that’s hell on earth, and whose underworld is the fucking crappiest thing to ever exist. You fucking bet I did.” Hiruma grins all teeth and no warmth whatsoever.

Tsuna can feel the migraine building already. He can already see the paperwork this mess will create.

“I hate you.” He groaned.

Hiruma just crackles.

Chapter Text

When Team Happy arrives in Namimori, three things happen.

The airport just north of Namimori explodes, Hiruma gets a phone call and a loud shrieking is heard from the shopping district. Now, Tsuna knows enough about coincidences, that he is not surprised, but after Hiruma gets that crazed look on his face Tsuna knows the rest of his day is going downhill. He’s become depressing used to having his vacation interrupted, that it's starting to become second nature to assume the worse. At this point, he should probably just go back to the office, but he can't just bring himself to do that.

It's his vacation time darn it.

But apparently, the universe is against him because not even the likes of Ye Xiu and Su Mechang are not enough to contain the weirdness that is the rest of Team Happy as two minutes later his phone rings.

"...is the airport still standing?"  He starts with as he answers the magic phone. It's important that he finds out now and not later, because the longer the building is left there out in the open the more paperwork it will undoubtedly generate. He knows this on a deep level. He's lived it. Repeatedly.

"You've grown fearsome, saboteur." The screen showing Ye Xiu smirks. Annoyingly. He's a young man with inky black hair, and blazing gold eyes, set on an equally striking face. His looks are so stunning that if Ye Xiu had any mind toward fashion, his family would have pushed him into the industry faster than anyone could say 'model'. But good looks or not, Ye Xiu is infuriating at the best of times, and right now Tsuna is not having a good day. At all.

Tsuna's eyebrow twitches impatiently. "Answer the question."

"Old Han's children are repairing it now."

".... And why is Han Wenqing here?"

"Zhang Xinjie needs a break." Ye Xiu says, but even as he tells Tsuna that, both of them know that's not the real answer.

Tsuna's life has never been quiet since he became a mage, so likely it is China that needs a break, rather than Zhang Xinjie. Whatever. The point is that more people are showing up than Tsuna intended and they're in his city, so now he needs to make plans, and notify people. Like Suzuka before there's another explosion. Scribing a quick note off Tsuna sends it before turning back to his magic phone.

"Did you get my paperwork? Or was Kunikida late?"

Ye Xiu smiles softly. "Of course, though certain detectives may come digging at the walls of Namimori."

Tsuna gives him the most deadpanned look he can muster because he really just doesn't care anymore. "I honestly couldn't care at this point anymore. I need information and Hiruma has enough on his plate. His case has apparently got something to do with my absent parental unit so there's that..."

Ye Xiu frowns ever so slightly, at the news but he doesn't say anything.

If Tsuna had to guess he would say that Ye Xiu already knew what was going on, but didn't want to admit it.

Family had always been a bit of a problem for the majority of the team and now that Tsuna's was starting to come out of the woodwork, everyone else was standing on pins and needles wondering what to say and what to do. Some of his former teammates were likely upset on his behalf while others may have felt that it wasn't their business until Tsuna came to them. Regardless all this tiptoeing around was going to get annoying and fast. 

"You can stop that," Tsuna says reaching into his magic box for something to eat. He didn't have much left after going so long without restocking, but he did manage to find some boxes of pocky. It should be enough for now. Looking back at Ye Xiu, Tsuna decides to be as blunt as possible. "I hate his actions but at the end of the day I know who my father is, and it isn't Sawada Iemitsu. So, feel free to do whatever when it comes to him..."

"...This one is glad for the clarity." Ye Xiu says after a second, and it doesn't escape either of their attention's that Ye Xiu slipped into his pretentious noble self but Tsuna will do him the favor and not say anything about it because he is just that tired, and he still has to explain it to everyone else—wait, maybe not.

"Tell Huang Shaotin would you?" Tsuna says hopefully. Because that's all he has now.

Hope.

Good god, that's depressing. 

Ye Xiu laughs and nods before hanging up.

And then his normal phone immediately rings.

Sighing deeply, Tsuna wastes no time and answers it.

“Hello?”

“I hate you.”

Tsuna blinks at the reply and the familiarity of that voice. “Kunikida?”

“Obviously. How did you manage this? I thought you were on vacation?” Kunikida growls, his voice muffled by the sounds of fluttering paper and the scratching of a pen. No doubt, he’s going through the paperwork in question.

Good gravy.

Tsuna thought he had more time before anyone thought to contact him to complain.

Groaning, Tsuna slumps onto the floor. “Of course, I am!” He hisses. “But the universe lives to piss me off. A random sink in the form of a Kokiri appeared and screwed everything up. Because the mafia—”

“Did I hear mafia?!” Another even more annoying voice says interrupting him.

Tsuna resists the urge to throw his phone out the window.

 “Was that Dazai?” Tsuna asks, even though he knows the answer.

“Unfortunately.”

“…”

“…”

“You know what?” Tsuna says so completely done. “I don’t care anymore. Come. Don’t come. If you need me, contact me. I’ll post my home address in the shared chat along with details. Just keep me in the loop.” He says before hanging up.

The urge to take an aging potion just so he can drink is very strong.

“That better not be who I think it is, fucking shrimp,” Hiruma says cutting through the silence.

Tsuna blinks. He had completely forgotten about him.

That’s not good…

“You fucking forgot about me, didn’t you?” Hiruma says and immediately jumps the table to smother him with a pillow.

He almost succeeds.

Almost.

XXxxxxXX

While across town, in an alleyway deep in the bad side of town a deep-red portal opens and a strange person steps out. He’s wearing a red coat and carrying a mike with an eye. He has a monocle, and his hands are closer to claws than fingers, but there’s an edge to him that’s different, that’s…inhuman.

The creature dusts off his coat, and humming a tune takes to the street.

“Well, well, how very interesting,” he says as he pulls out a pocket watch, and scans through the new notification. He reads through it, and to his glee finds something very intriguing among the forms. “I was getting rather bored in hell…”

Closing his pocket watch, and putting it up, he heads into town, humming a funeral tune as he slides his claws along the building’s walls. He pays little attention to the fact that his footsteps are bloody or that his shadow has dozens of eyes.

It's only to be expected really…

He is a demon. (1)

XXxxxxXX