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Around her, Jitters is as busy as ever. People coming and going with their orders, people taking time out of their work day to just sit and enjoy a well earned break. College students sit scattered around, heads buried in books or laptops. The odd couple here and there. A quiet hum of conversation filling the air.
But none of that filters into her mind, breaks her thoughts.
On the table before her a cinnamon bun sits untouched on a plate, a steaming cup of coffee beside it. The steam rising away from the mug, her eyes follow as the steam wisps up and away, disappearing into thin air.
Her mind is a jumble of never ending thoughts and emotions and at the forefront right now is a sense of guilt for snapping at the boys back in Ralph's office, especially when they were only trying to help, only having her best interests at heart. She'll apologise, once she gets back, of course she will and she knows that they understand how she feels but if only she could. Anger and hurt, despair and confusion are just some of the feelings she's feeling right now. She just can't seem to wrap her mind around it, this new discovery concerning her dad. Why would he fake his own death? Why would he leave everything he had behind? A well respected job, a wife and a daughter? What could make someone walk away from all of that? She hasn't got the answer and that's what hurts but on the other hand, does she really want to know, why?
Bracing her elbows on the table she stares down at the cinnamon bun before reaching out to rather violently tear a piece off. Just as she's just about to pop the piece into her mouth, a hand brushes her back and she looks to her right to find Harry beside her. It takes everything not to fall apart just at the sight of him but she manages to hold it together.
"What are you doing here?" She asks quietly.
"Coffee and you," he responds equally quiet before he elaborates. "Cisco texted me," he answers more honestly.
"He shouldn't have bothered you."
"Yes, he should have." Harry moves his hand down her back slowly before moving to take a seat opposite her. Placing his coffee down in front of him.
Caitlin picks at the bun, her eyes on the man before her. "How's your day been?"
"Uneventful, which surprisingly... is a rather nice change actually."
"That's good," she smiles, truly meaning it. Happy that he's adjusting, at least to life with her. Life back at the lab is another thing. Somewhere he's avoided since he came back. "Did he ask about coming back?"
"No, I assume he had other things on his mind."
She drops her eyes away, immediately knowing exactly what he's talking about.
"Caitlin, why don't you want to investigate your dad's death certificate?"
The question is said so softly, so cautiously and it makes her look up to meet his gaze. Tears flood her eyes and it takes everything not to let them fall. "Because... if it's true... if he has been alive this whole time..." she falters as her voice breaks. "It just means he didn't want to see me."
"Sweetheart..." Harry murmurs, reaching across the table to take her hand in his. Fingers lacing together. "It's not to late to change things with your father."
Her hand tightens around his and she bites her bottom lip. Trying desperately not to cry, not here in the middle of Jitters. "But what if he doesn't want anything to do with me?"
"Maybe he doesn't," he shrugs before continuing, "but wouldn't it be better to face that truth than spend the rest of your life wondering." Harry tells her quietly, his heart silently breaking for her. "But I can't ever imagine someone knowing you and not wanting to be a part of your life or have you in theirs."
"Harry..." His soft heartfelt words do it and break the dam. She covers her face with her free hand, to hide her emotions and herself at breaking point.
Harry abandons his coffee as well as his chair as he gets up to move to her. Releasing her hand, he cups her face to get her to look at him. "He's a damn fool, to walk away and leave you. Walking away from the chance to know an incredibly beautiful and talented woman like you."
The way he says it, is like it's the most unimaginable thing in the world.
Caitlin shakes her head, a sob lodging in her throat and she pulls Harry against her, burying her face in his shoulder as he wraps her in his arms. Arms that are strong and secure, making her feel safe. It should feel strange yet it's almost fascinating just how quickly they've settled together, how natural it feels to have him close like this. He's only been back a very short time, staying with her instead of at the lab, needing a little more time to find his balance before returning. It's only barely been two days since she travelled to Earth two and brought him back and so quickly he's become her rock as well as her lover. Her grounding, her beacon. She tightens her arms around him, tilting her head to press her lips to his jaw. Shifting she touches her mouth to his, there's no heat like there normally would be, it's just soft, intimate and comforting but it's still good and still manages to leave her wanting more.
Pulling back she looks at him, giving him a soft sincere smile. "Thank you," she whispers gratefully. Grateful to have him in her life. That decision of travelling to earth two seems to be the best she's ever made as each day passes.
Harry shakes his head, thumbs working to brush away evidence of her tears. "No, no thanks needed."
"It just feels like one step forward only for two steps back, you know?"
"I know." And he does, he's felt the same way hundreds of times before. Tenderly, he runs his fingers through her hair. Trying to give physical comfort as well as verbal, hoping that it's working as much as he hopes.
Caitlin trails her hands down his coat, fingers playing with the buttons. A look of careful consideration crossing her pretty features. "You're right though, I should find out the truth otherwise there'll always be... what if, you know?"
Leaning in, he kisses her quick before pulling back. "You deserve to know, you deserve an explanation."
Caitlin nods, because she does, she deserves to know the truth. "I'll talk to Ralph and Cisco."
"Good," Harry says, dropping his hands away from her face to her wrists, holding her hands to his chest. "Do you want me to come back to the lab with you?"
It means more than he can imagine that he's made the offer but no. As much as she wants him to come back, to be there, she knows he needs this time. Time for himself, away from the lab to figure things out and to just relax. He's admitted since he's been back that that's something he's rarely allowed himself, time to relax, instead always working or chasing after Jesse despite her protestations.
"No, it's fine. I'm fine but thank you for offering."
"Are you sure?"
"I am," she tugs at his coat. "You come back when you're ready not because I need you."
He looks like he wants to protest but he doesn't. "Are you alright now?" He asks instead.
"Yes, thanks to you."
"I love you," he says suddenly out of nowhere yet simply, in reply. Like that's all the answer there is to give to her thanks and it kind of is. Because it sums everything up perfectly.
Her already on edge emotions flare up once more. This open honesty is going to take some getting used too, on both sides. That's not to say she doesn't like it though, because she does. "I love you too."
"I'll see you later," Harry tells her, reaching for his coffee. "Call me if you need anything."
"I will."
She accepts his kiss goodbye with a smile, that smile widening when it lingers longer than intended.
"Bye," she whispers against his mouth as he pulls away.
He smirks at her and then he's gone, leaving her behind to watch him go.
She wipes her face and takes a deep, calming breath. Giving herself a little time to compose herself, to dampen her raging emotions and thoughts.
One thing is for sure though and that is Harry was exactly what she needed, she thinks as she stares down at her coffee. Their talk clearing up her worries and with a renewed determination to figure this entire situation out, Caitlin stands from the table, grabbing her coat from the stool beside her.
Walking away, she leaves behind her mostly untouched cinnamon bun, her cooling coffee and her fear of what she could find out.
The end.