Chapter Text
.insomnia.
“I can’t sleep,” whispers Jeongguk. His tall frame stands out starkly against the harsh lights of the hallway, and Jimin sighs gently. He holds out his arms, and Jeongguk relaxes, rushing forward.
“Wow, you look pretty awful,” Jimin chuckles, thumbing Jeongguk’s cheek. There are dark purple shadows underneath his eyes, and Jimin looks at them worriedly. Jeongguk’s skin is stretched too tight over his bones. His baggy shirt hangs off his torso a little too loosely. He looks like a textbook definition of ‘too’: too much work, too little sleep.
Jeongguk huffs. “Wow, thanks, that makes me feel so much better.” There’s a tired bite to his voice. His eyes, large and brown, nervously flit all over Jimin’s small bedroom. Oh, thinks Jimin. Exhaustion is written all over Jeongguk—the slight tremble, the wobbly voice, the stiff limbs—but it takes Jimin’s trained eye to see it. He glances at the bed. Jeongguk gives a tiny nod, and Jimin just smiles and tucks him in before climbing in after Jeongguk.
They cuddle for a while, wrapping each other in warm arms, Jimin smoothing down Jeongguk’s hair. The air goes still, slow and tender, and a soothing calm fills the room. Still, Jeongguk’s body hums with pent-up energy--energy that his body doesn’t need and can’t take.
The younger boy worries his lip anxiously. “Stop that,” says Jimin. “You’ll make it bleed again.” He kisses Jeongguk softly. That gets him to stop, but all he does is look at Jimin with scared eyes. His lips are parted, pink and soft, red where he was biting at them. Jimin kisses them again for good measure.
The silence stretches on until Jeongguk breathes in slowly, ready to speak. “Today sucked,” he whispers. Jimin holds him close, listening to the sounds of his heart beating. “I just—I don’t think I can do it anymore.”
Jeongguk had been so excited to work with Min Yoongi and Jung Hoseok—Agust D and J-Hope—on a song. They’d celebrated, viewing the occasion as a potential big break with two of the most respected producers and artists in the music community. There had been the underlying prospect of a daunting task, the tension of proving himself, but a few glasses of soju and many kisses had washed it away.
Now, it seems, the stress is hitting Jeongguk full force.
“Why not?” whispers Jimin.
Jeongguk closes his eyes. “Nothing I do or make is ever good enough for them. And all the project deadlines, everyone listening to us and watching us…it’s so hard. I can’t do anything right compared to them.” The words fall out of his mouth like it’s all he ever thinks about, and Jimin’s heart clenches tightly.
“You’re perfect,” Jimin murmurs back. “Yoongi and Hobi think you're amazing—it’s just different, okay? You’re working so hard, your music brings me to tears, and you sing like an angel. Anyone’s blind and deaf if they can’t realize that.”
Jeongguk’s tight muscles relax a little under Jimin’s arms.
“This mixtape is going to be beautiful. And when you release it, I’ll be the first in line to buy it, and I’ll love it half to death.” Jimin smiles as younger boy hiccups softly and murmurs, “I’ll like that.” They lie there, still and just inhaling the scent of sleep. When Jeongguk’s breathing starts to slow down and his body curls around Jimin’s, the warmth of safety fills the air.
“I love you,” whispers Jimin. He strokes Jeongguk’s back, swirling his fingers again and again into I love you I love you I love you.
“I love you, too,” mumbles Jeongguk.
They fall asleep like that, under the far-away gaze of Tomorrow, underneath the promise of sunshine in the morning and healing right now. Jimin rubs constellations made of I love you, pressing them into Jeongguk’s skin. They sleep, using each other as a safety blanket because that’s all they’ll ever need. Love and each other.