Chapter 1: Homework Cheating Ring
Chapter Text
Sora sent a message to Riku, Kairi, and 7 others.
Sora: Hey can I copy your homework?
Sora: ….Welp, I meant to send that to everyone individually
Sora: I guess we have a group chat now :D
Kairi: It was a nice attempt though.
Kairi: But you didn't even specify what class? What do you need? Keyblade history? Spellcasting 101?
Sora: I'll literally take anything
Kairi: Have you seriously done no homework!?
Sora: I've been busy with other things!!!!!
Kairi: Like?
Sora: It’s not important what I was doing!!!
Aqua: Umm Sora, you realize some people in this chat are a couple grades ahead of you right?
Sora: Well, Aqua , I clearly didn't think this through
Namine: I can help you with it Sora :)
Sora: Aw thank you :)
Sora: and by help you mean just giving me pics of the hw right?
Riku: Hey you can't do that! Thats cheating!
Sora: Please
Riku: What?? No you can’t cheat.
Sora: Please
Riku: Saying it again isn't going to change anything.
Sora: P-pwease Rwiku owo
Riku: OMG NO
Roxas: I don't know what this is but I hate it.
Roxas left the chat
Sora added Roxas to the chat
Roxas: I don't want to be apart of your weird furry chat.
Sora: No please stay!!! I promise I won't use furry talk anymore!!
Roxas: Nah I don't wanna. Besides I don't even know half the people in here.
Sora: and a group chat is the best way to get to know them :D
Roxas: Thanks but no.
Sora: Why? D:
Roxas: There's literally only 2 people here I'd consider friends and one person I don't particularly like.
Roxas: why would I stay?
Xion: Oh do we have a group chat now? Cool! I've always wanted to be apart of one of those but I never had enough friends before now.
Roxas: Fine I'll stay
Sora: =D that's the power of friendship!
Axel: Nah I think that's the power of Xion's guilt tripping
Namine: I know how you feel Xion. I never had friends before this year either and now I'm apart of a groupchat!!!!! :D Im so happy
Kairi: ouch my heart
Axel: :’0
Aqua: Namine and Xion, I know we haven't hung out very much, but I want you to know that I consider you both friends.
Kairi: Yeah same here!
Terra: So are people leaking homework pics or what?
Aqua: Terra!!!!
Roxas: annnnnd the moment is gone.
Sora: okay but he brings up a good point
Aqua: I wish there was an emoji that could accurately display the disappointment I'm feeling.
Ventus: I wish I wasn't a grade level below you because I'd definitely let you copy my homework bro
Terra: Bro you already do so much for me, don't worry about
Ventus: But bro I want to give you the world
Terra: Bro…
Ventus: bro..
Roxas: barf
Kairi: Hey, not saying I approve of cheating or anything but maybe a few of us should make a separate chat where we post homework answers.
Sora: I approve of making a homework cheating ring
Roxas: You realize that the only people that would join are the people who don't do the homework right?
Sora: …dang it
Sora: Wait what about Xion?
Xion: Huh, me?
Sora: Yes you! You're smart and you have good grades!!
Sora: You are the only one in this group who does their homework and would be willing to let others copy
Sora: Please Xion you are my only hope!!!!
Xion: …
Xion: Then perish
Axel: ahsbdhdhdjsjahsihdidhhdh
Riku: omg
Kairi: I can't believe Xion just murdered Sora
Xion: I can't believe Sora is fucking dead
Ventus: R.I.P in pieces
Namine: What, wait I thought it was just a joke??
Namine: Is Sora okay??
Sora: I'm fine but I died
Namine: Oh that's a relief :D
Vanitas: Oh my fucking God
Vanitas: Why do I have so many fucking messages?
Vanitas: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?
Aqua: >:O language
Sora: Yeah watch your fucking language
Riku: OKAY WHO TAUGHT SORA THE FUCK WORD?
Kairi: “The fuck word”
Roxas: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time
Kairi: Oh my god he censored it
Axel: Say fuck Roxas
Kairi: Do it Roxas, say fuck
Xion: F r i c k
Roxas: Okay but who taught Xion memes?
Xion: I've always know memes, they are apart of who I am.
Ventus: Oh oops someone accidentally let Vanitas into the chat.
Ventus: Sorry sweaty this chat is for our friends only. You're going to have to go. You can make your own chat with your own friend though
Ventus: oh wait :/
Vanitas: Okay so that's how it's going to be huh?
Vanitas is now an admin
Sora: H
Sora: How'd you do that!?
Vanitas: >:3c
Sora: I'm terrified
Vanitas changed Ventus’ and 9 others usernames
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: What?
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: I didn't know we could change our names.
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Also is mine supposed to be an insult?
SoraKinNoDoublesUWU: If you knew anything about Terra it would be.
SoraKinNoDoublesUWU: Wait WHY IS THIS MY NAME????
Princess.jpg: big oof
FlamingHomosexual: I'm wHEEZING
ArtHoe: I'm so confused, who's talking?
MikeyRiku: I think I know who is who
MickeyRiku:...
MickeyRiku: CHANGE MY NAME RIGHT NOW
he shoe too big: LOLOLOLOL what's mine?
he shoe too big: :/ disappointed honestly
Vanitas: Oh shut it. Like you could do any better.
he shoe too big: Hmmm probably not
Mom: I'm so confused too “ArtHoe”.
2 brain cells: Well I'm Terra if anyone was wondering.
Vanitas: No one was
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Two names dissing Terra!?
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Fuck you Vantias, Terra is so sweet and friendly and you just rag on him for no reason!
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: God you are so annoying.
Mom: I think I found Ventus.
Who?: I'm Xion
Who?: Oh
Who?: Mine makes me a lil sad tbh
SoraKinNoDoublesUWU: This is why we don't let Vanitas have admin privileges.
FlamingHomsexual: Okay as funny as these are, I gotta ask how the hell do you know this much about us?
Mom: Yeah, not to be rude but I barely know you Vantias. How do you know enough to make fun of us?
Who?: And some of these names are in reference to things you weren't there for...
Vanitas: You're kidding right?
Vanitas: you realize “friendship is my power” kid has been bothering me to join your little posse for the past month now
Vanitas: I always tell him to fuck off but he's always come back to pester me. Saying shit like “but you'd love Riku! He's so funny and cool oh and he had this huge Mickey Mouse phase as a kid”
Vanitas: The idiot gives all your secrets away for free ALL the time
MikeyRiku: Hey Sora can you come over to my dorm please.
MickeyRiku: I just wanna talk.
he shoe too big: Wow would you look at the time? Welp I gotta go now so maybe next time Riku
RikuMickey: SORA
Chapter 2: Minecraft is actually good guys
Summary:
All their screen names:
he shoe too big - Sora
MickeyRiku - Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Princess.jpg - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 brain cells - Terra
Terra_did_nothing_wrong - Ventus
Chapter Text
ArtHoe : Good morning everyone =) how are your days going?
Who? : Pretty good. I started a Minecraft let's play channel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: I'm sorry you did what?
Who?: Minecraf
Vanitas: Oh wow look at me I'm sooo special with my little minecraft channel *pffft* just stream Fornite like the rest of us loser
Who?: You better watch yourself before I get my diamond sword
Vanitas: Ha! Your blocky ass can't do anything against me. Have you ever gotten a victory royale? No. Didn't think so.
Who?: Fornite < Minecraft hunger games
Vanitas: You take that back bitch
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Can someone please translate what they are saying.
he shoe too big: I can't believe there are people out there who play games that aren't Roblox :/
Vanitas: That sentence physically hurt to read
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Actually, nevermind, I don't want to know.
MickeyRiku: Stop texting in class guys >:(
he shoe too big: Didn't you just text in class in order to tell us not to text in class *thinking emoji*
MickeyRiku: Mine doesn't count. I did a wrong to make a right.
he shoe too big: What? That’s not how it works
Vanitas: Even if it was, the only way for you to know we were texting in class was for you to check your phone during class.
he shoe too big: OOOOOOHH OWNED
MickeyRiku: I wasn't “owned”
MickeyRiku: I just keep checking my phone because it keeps vibrating because you guys keep texting in class!
Vanitas: Silence your phone then dipshit
MickeyRiku: I keep it on just in case for emergencies
Vanitas: What possible emergency could there be that would need you to have your phone on vibrate?
MickeyRiku: Idk maybe there's an emergency where Sora really needs me for whatever reason and he has to get in contact with me.
MickeyRiku: Situations like that are why I keep my phone on vibrate.
Who?: Wow gay
Vanitas: gay
Who?: gay gay gay gay g a y
he shoe too big: gay
MickeyRiku: What? Why is everyone saying gay?
he shoe too big: You know how when you drive past a deer and everyone in the car shouts “deer”?
MickeyRiku: Uh yeah I guess?
he shoe too big: That
MickeyRiku: What?
Who?: Well I’m going to go back to playing
Who?: …
Who?: Hey guys I'm crying right now
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: What?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Why?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: What happened?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Who did this to you?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: I'll kill them
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: What's their name?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Where do they live?
FlamingHomsexual: Jesus Christ Roxas I'm getting like a million notifications stfu
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Scroll up
FlamingHomsexual: I'll kill them
FlamingHomsexual: Who hurt you?
FlamingHomsexual: I'll kill them
FlamingHomsexual: I've killed before
FlamingHomsexual: I'm not afraid to kill again.
MikeyRiku: I'm sorry what
Who?: I'm crying so hard because I just love Enderman so much but he'll never know it.
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Who's Enderman?
Who?: Minecraf
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Oh it's just from your game.
MickeyRiku: I'm sorry can we go back to where Axel said he has killed before.
Who?: My love for him is so great that it hurts
Who?: I just want him to be happy
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: I'm sure your dumb video game character knows you love him.
Who?: :’0 you think so?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: I know so.
MickeyRiku: I just think we are really glossing over something huge
Who?: No one as pure as Enderman deserves to be in this cruel world. I wish I could whisk him away to some paradise where he can never get hurt and only be happy for eternity.
FlamingHomsexual: That was beautiful Xion. Really poetic.
MickeyRiku: Yeah, okay, cool, back to the person you killed.
Who?: No one cares about your problems Riku. Believe it or not shit is not always about you.
MikeyRiku: h
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Now that was beautiful Xion. Really poetic.
Mom: Well class is over and I got a chance to see all the messages. I would hate to see you guys get in trouble for texting. Not to mention all the important material you are missing from not paying attention. I really hope you guys try to focus in class from now on.
he shoe too big: sorry we disappointed you mom :(
Who?: Speaking of 'mom’ since I guess we all decided to keep the nicknames shouldn't Vanitas get one too??
Mom: We didn't exactly decide to keep the nicknames, it's more like we can't change them because only admins can do that.
he shoe too big: Yeah so we can't change Vanitas name either.
MickeyRiku: But aren't you an admin Sora? You made the chat
he shoe too big: Oh?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: So are you telling me that the only people that can change our names is Vanitas and Sora?
he shoe too big: OH?
ArtHoe: I think it's in settings.
he shoe too big changed Vanitas’ name to Edgy Sonic OC
Edgy Sonic OC: Shut up ugly
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: The two of you look the exact same. You are just calling yourself ugly.
Edgy Sonic OC: Shut up ugly
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Should of just called him ‘the one no one likes’
Edgy Sonic OC: Go back to trying to shove your keyblade up your own ass.
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Wow real original how about you go back to crying in a Hot Topic
Who?: Why do you guys hate each other so much :/
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: because Vanitas is a big stupid head
Edgy Sonic OC: and Ventus is a cunt
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: You two really have a way with words
Mom: I think they started fighting sometime during their freshman year. Believe it or not, there was a time when two of them used to be friends.
2 Brain Cells: Yeah I remember seeing them hanging out like a year ago
Who?: Wow really? How'd they get to this?
Edgy Sonic OC: We were never “friends”. We just used to talk because we were in the same class but after getting to know him I realized Ventus sucks major dick.
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: God you are always the worst.
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: I don't have the energy to deal with Vanitas right now. I'm going to go take a nap.
he shoe too big: Guys we shouldn’t be fighting :/
Edgy Sonic OC: Tell that to nap boy
he shoe too big: This group chat was supposed make us all better friends.
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Not all of us here are friends
he shoe too big: But you guys are all my friends….
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: That doesn't automatically make us friends with each other.
he shoe too big: Not if I can help it! From this moment forward I will do everything in my power to make everyone the best of friends!!!! Operation Friendship GO!!!!!
Edgy Sonic OC: pfffffft good luck with that
he shoe too big: Thank you for the support :D
MickeyRiku: Sora I'm pretty sure that he is being sarcastic.
he shoe too big: I'll take what I can get :D
Chapter 3: Riku uses Caps Lock A Lot the Chapter
Summary:
he shoe too big - Sora
MickeyRiku - Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Princess.jpg - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 brain cells - Terra
Terra_did_nothing_wrong - Ventus
Chapter Text
Riku sent a message to Kairi
Riku: hahxbdbshvsusdjsbjsabja ajabajabsjsbsnsbsbsbs sbxbdbsjsnakabjajs
Kairi: You good?
Riku: Let me get out one more
Kairi: Go ahead
Riku: ajdkcokejbwsjsbsjbabauabajha aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Kairi: Better?
Riku: Yeah
Kairi: Okay now tell me what's wrong.
Riku: I'm having a crisis
Kairi: Oh goodie what kind?
Riku: A romantic crisis
Kairi: Oh, is this about your crush on Sora?
Riku: HOW'D YOU KNOW!?!?!??!
Kairi: ….dude
Riku: PLEASE DON'T TELL ANYONE!!!
Kairi: I really don't need to.
Riku: IS IT THAT OBVIOUS!??!??!?
Kairi: Saying you have a crush on Sora is like saying the sky is blue.....or that Sora has a crush on you.
Riku: ajdhdbsbshhavahahsh
Riku: Okay first of all it is not obvious! I keep my feelings hidden very well.
Kairi: uh huh
Riku: Second of all Sora does not like me
Kairi: uh huh
Riku: He doesn't!!!!
Kairi: And all that flirtatious joking is?
Riku: It's not flirting!!! Sora just jokes around a lot you know this!!! There's nothing flirtatious about it!!!!
Kairi: Remember when he called you gay when you said you keep your phone on for him.
Riku: Yes as a joke!!!! He doesn't see me as anything more than just a friend!!!
Kairi: omfg
Kairi: You've earned your spot
Riku: my spot in what?
Kairi added Riku to Big Bi Buffoons
Kairi: Hey guys, I had to add Riku because his crush on Sora is starting to cause him mental turmoil.
Riku: KAIRI WHAT THE FUCK YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO TELL ANYONE I TRUSTED YOU
Kairi: Everyone in this chat who didn't know Riku had a crush on Sora before this moment say “I”.
Aqua:
Terra:
Axel:
Riku: Someone please say I
Demxy: "I" but only because I literally don't know who those people are.
Larxene: Yeah same
Zexion: I don't know who they are but even I knew Riku had a crush on Sora.
Riku: What how?
Zexion: I see you two around the school, talking in the halls and what not. Thought you guys were dating honestly.
Riku: NO WE ARE JUST FRIENDS
Kairi: and get this, he doesn't think Sora likes him back.
Terra: Listen, I'll be honest, I'm not the smartest when it comes to romance. I have a very hard time reading people's emotions and I don't pick up on subtle cues.
Riku: Yeah?
Terra: But even I can tell has a huge crush on you.
Riku: ahshdbxbsheb NO HE DOESN'T
Kairi: Alright team, how do we fix this?
Zexion: I'm assuming we can't count on one of them just confessing because they are cowards.
Riku: Hey!
Larxene: If he's wrong go ask him out on a date, problem solved.
Riku:....
Zexion: Anywho, my best suggestion is to just hang out with him more. Try to make your feeling more clear.
Riku: I guess I can try...
Axel: Or, and just hear me out, you just ask him out.
Riku: NO
Axel: why not?
Riku: It's complicated…
Riku: We've been best friends for the longest time.
Axel: So?
Riku: So? So!? So I don't want to lose my life long friend.
Axel: Oh come on, that's not going to happen.
Riku: Yes it is!!! If I confess and he rejects me we'll never be able to go back to being friends.
Terra: Now you should have more faith in your bud. Do you really think he'll abandon you over something like that?
Riku: Y E S
Kairi: Then you don't know a thing about Sora. He is the most loyal person alive.
Riku: Okay but consider this: I'm scared
Larxene: Just ask him out pussy
Aqua: Hey don't push him to do something he doesn't want to!
Larxene: why not?
Aqua: You just can't force these kind of things. If you are patient then they'll slowly realize each other's feeling and a relationship will naturally follow suit.
Axel: Nah just confess
Larxene: Yeah just skip the bullshit
Riku: :'(
Aqua: Okay fine. How about this?
Aqua: We can force Riku to confess to Sora if you two ask your own crushes out.
Larxene:....
Axel: How'd you know I liked Saix?!?!?!?!?
Aqua: I didn't till just now.
Larxene: ...
Axel: Damn…
Axel: Fine you win
Kairi: Is everyone here too scared to ask their crushes out!?
Axel: Why do you think I called the chat Big Bi Buffoons?
Axel: We are all disaster bis/gays/lesbians here
Kairi: Except for me!
Axel: *thinking emoji*
Kairi: It's true! Back on Destiny Islands I had a boyfriend!
Riku: I can vouch for that...though the relationship lasted a week and it was Tidus who asked her out.
Kairi: shhhh they don't need to know that.
Aqua: Any who back to the original dilemma.
Aqua: The weekend is coming, you should invite him to go to the movies or something.
Kairi: Oh and if you're nervous about it you could invite the whole group. Frame it as a friend get-together.
Kairi: But you know, only hang out with him ;)
Riku: That's not a bad idea
Riku: Okay I'll try it!
Axel: We are rooting for you!
Aqua: You can do it
Terra: You kids grow up so fast :')
Zexion: You are only a year older than him...
Riku sent a message to Kairi
Riku: Hey thanks for that
Riku: I really needed a bunch of people to yell at me to snap me out of my panic.
Kairi: Anything for my best friend
Riku: By the way, why are you in a chat with a bunch of upperclassmen?
Kairi: Because I'm just that cool B)
Riku: hmmmmm doubt
Kairi: You don't think I'm the coolest ever?
Riku:
Kairi: Fine
Kairi: Axel was the one who made it and added me to it. Most of the peeps there are his classmates.
Riku: That makes more sense
Kairi: Hey now I'm hella cool B)
Riku: Hell yeah you are
Riku: Alright I'm going to try your idea now.
Riku: Even though I'm still, like, super nervous.
Kairi: good luck!
MickeyRiku sent a message to Sora's group chat
MickeyRiku: Hey everyone, I have an idea
MickeyRiku: How about on Saturday night we all hang out? We could have a movie night!
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: no
MickeyRiku: .....oh
MickeyRiku left the chat
Chapter 4: The Bee Movie is Still Funny Right?
Summary:
he shoe too big - Sora
MickeyRiku - Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Princess.jpg - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 brain cells - Terra
Terra_did_nothing_wrong - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
he shoe too big added MickeyRiku to the chat.
he shoe too big: what the heck was that?
Princess.jpg: It was him being a coward.
FlamingHomosexual: smh
Mom: It was a good try honey!
2 brain cells: Don’t give up!
he shoe too big: I feel like I’m missing something???
Princess.jpg: Jesus you are just as bad as him.
he shoe too big: ??????
Princess.jpg: Don’t worry about it.
he shoe too big: worrying intensifies
ArtHoe: I would like to see a movie with everyone :D
Who?: Movie night! Movie night! Movie night!
FlamingHomsexual: You can take that as Xion saying she wants to go too
Who?:.....
FlamingHomsexual: Am I wrong?
Who?: No you're not, I really want a movie night it's just….
Who?: You know what never mind ignore me
Who?: I’m just being silly
FlamingHomsexual: ????????
Who?: Really it was nothing
Who?: Let’s have a movie night!
Princess.jpg: Yeah! What movie should we see?
2 Brain Cells: Oh I heard there's going to be a new Grinch movie!
2 Brain Cells: Let’s see that
Princess.jpg: Die
FlamingHomsexual: Die
he shoe too big: Die
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Die
Mom: Ventus!?!?
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Bro I love you, but if you ever so much as mention that atrocity against humanity again, you can consider our broship dead.
Mom: holy shit?????
Princess.jpg: I can’t believe Ventus just killed Terra.
Edgy Sonic OC: lol I vote on watching the Grinch movie
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Listen you absolute spoon. I don't care if you hate me. I don't even care if you hate Terra. No living being on this planet deserves that type of cruel, festering despair. Even though I think your heartless, I know you are not evil enough to exact that kind of torture on anyone. So please, don't even joke about it.
FlamingHomsexual: I’M ON THE FLOOR!!!!
Who?: ajdhdbsjabbJabsbsjnsjsbs
he shoe too big: Ventus, honest to God question, are you okay?
Edgy Sonic OC: Dude even I'm shook
Princess.jpg: “Absolute spoon” was my favorite part
2 Brain Cells: I feel like I'm missing something???
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Have
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: Have any of you watched the trailers?
2 Brain Cells: um no?
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: For my sanity, please do.
Edgy Sonic OC: Wow looks like a great film
Terra_did_nothing_wrong:
Edgy Sonic OC: God that hurt. I can't even say it to pick on Ventus. I have never felt such unbridled rage over a trailer.
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: So we all agree we aren't going anywhere near that movie.
ArtHoe: Yes
2 Brain Cells: Wow even Namine
ArtHoe: I hate movies that disgrace the animation industry.
MickeyRiku: So who else is coming?
MickeyRiku: Like, uhhhhh Sora, are you coming?
Princess.jpg: Smooth
Who?: Gay
Edgy Sonic OC: Gay
he shoe too big: gay and yes I would love to go
Riku sent a message to Kairi
Riku: HE SAID HE'D LOVE TO GO
Kairi: I know I was there
Sora's Group Chat
MickeyRiku: Cool how about everyone else?
Mom: It sounds fun, I'll bring snacks
2 Brain Cells: You can count me in
FlamingHomsexual: Me too
Terra_did_nothing_wrong: I will if we don't watch you know what.
Edgy Sonic OC: I'll go since it's better than doing nothing all day
Princess.jpg: You know I'm going.
Princess.jpg: We could have it at my place back at Destiny Islands too if you want.
FlamingHomsexual: Oh yeah we should
FlamingHomsexual: Miss princess over here has a pretty big living room and a huge tv.
Princess.jpg: What can I say?
Princess.jpg: Being $$$ a princess of light $$$ definitely has $$$ its perks $$$$$$$
FlamingHomsexual: Geez wonder what those perks could possibly be
Princess.jpg: At least I'm sharing it with my good friends.
ArtHoe: I've never seen your house before Kairi I'm excited!
ArtHoe: But if we are going to Destiny Islands can someone please give me a ride?
ArtHoe: I'm not that good at teleportation ;-;
Edgy Sonic OC: What do you mean? Isn't that like one of the first things they teach you?
Edgy Sonic OC: How'd you get into this school?
Princess.jpg: Hey leave her alone!
Princess.jpg: Not everyone has wielded a keyblade as long as you.
he shoe too big: Also not everyone is taught the traditional way.
Princess.jpg: ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
ArtHoe: I'm sorry I have to ask for a ride. I know I should be better with my keyblade by now.
Princess.jpg: Namine you are a perfect, beautiful angel who doesn't need to apologize for anything and will absolutely be getting a ride from me this Saturday.
Who?: Gay
Edgy Sonic OC: Jesus Ventus just dm me a fucking wall of text about how awful I am
Princess.jpg: hmmmmm wonder why
Edgy Sonic OC: Geez I didn't mean it in a rude way I was just legit curious
Princess.jpg: ….fine I'll let it slide
Princess.jpg: Anyway looks like we are all in agreement about where movie night is happening.
MickeyRiku: Okay and everyone but Roxas is coming right?
Who?: You don't want to come Roxas?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU:......
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: I guess if everyone else is I might as well.
Who?: Yay movie night!!!
FlamingHomosexual: See guys
FlamingHomosexual: If you want anything out of Roxas you go to Xion
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: No, I'm just going because everyone else is
FlamingHomsexual: uh huh
MickeyRiku: Back to the original topic of picking out a movie
Mom: Let's watch a nice pg-rated animated movie
Edgy Sonic OC: No
Mom: Please don't be like this
he shoe too big: I think an animated movie will work out best
Who?: May I make a suggestion
he shoe too big: sure
Who?: How about we watch the best film ever made
Who?: Bee Movie
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Please no
Princess.jpg: I have the dvd at home.
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Why????
Princess.jpg: That's a stupid question.
2 Brain Cells: I am so down for Bee movie
he shoe too big: same
FlamingHomsexual: Sure why not
MickeyRiku: Looks like we have winner
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Of course we ended up with something like freaking Bee movie.
Princess.jpg: Please just say fuck Roxas
FlamingHomsexual: Say fuck
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: You guys are weird.
MickeyRiku: Alright well I guess we'll meet up on Saturday
Princess.jpg: You guys can come over anytime.
Princess.jpg: I'll start the movie at 7.
he shoe too big: Sounds good see you there
FlamingHomsexual: See ya!
Notes:
By the way, has anyone noticed any grammar mistakes or typos? I try to read over the chapters a couple times before posting but I never know if some errors slipped past me. If you see any please tell me ^.^
Chapter 5: Gaymers
Summary:
he shoe too big - Sora
MickeyRiku - Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Princess.jpg - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 brain cells - Terra
Terra_did_nothing_wrong - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Who?: Alright boys it's 1 am
Who?: It's gamer hours now
Who?: Who up?
Edgy Sonic OC: Me of course
Who?: Ah yes, a fellow gamer
he shoe too big: Hewwo
Who?: Good, the gang's all here
Edgy Sonic OC: What's everyone playing tonight?
Who?: Pokemon let's go
he shoe too big: Pikachu or Eevee
Who?: Pikachu
he shoe too big: disgusting
Who?: Excuse
he shoe too big: Eevee is clearly better
Who?: Obviously not
he shoe too big: Vanitas help us settle this which one is better?
Edgy Sonic OC: No
Who?: That's fair
Who?: Anyway what are you two playing?
Edgy Sonic OC: Overwatch
Edgy Sonic OC: Sora I see you typing and I stg if you are going to quote the tik tok meme I will go to your room and hit you with my controller
he shoe too big: …..
he shoe too big: Okay nevermind
Who?: I mean I was gonna do it until I saw Sora typing
Who?: And that's when I realized
Who?: He was already Tracer
FlamingHomsexual: Yo I just heard someone's door slam shut
FlamingHomsexual: It was loud as hell I heard it from across the hall
he shoe too big: That was probably Vanitas on his way to murder Xion
Who?: I'd like to see him get past my defenses
he shoe too big: Also what are you doing up so late?
Who?: Are you a gamer too?
FlamingHomsexual: Nah but I am the type of student who stays up on a Friday night
he shoe too big: You're a party guy?
FlamingHomsexual: Not exactly
FlamingHomsexual: More like I've been lying in my bed, eating hot cheetos, and watching YouTube videos for hours on end because that’s how I cope with being alive.
he shoe too big: That’s a mood
FlamingHomosexual: So what are you playing?
he shoe too big: Not to brag or anything but I’m almost at the final boss of Kirby epic yarn
FlamingHomosexual: Cool, I have no idea what that is
Who?: Someone is very aggressively knocking at my door
Edgy Sonic OC: Hey open up I just want to hit you with my controller
he shoe too big: You realize if you do Roxas is going to track you down.
Edgy Sonic OC: I'm not scared of twinkas
2 Brain Cells: Please someone tell me why the first thing I saw when I woke up was twinkas
he shoe too big: It just be like that sometimes
FlamingHomosexual: Yo Terra! Whatcha doing up this late?
2 Brain Cells: I had a dream where Aqua was dressed up as a clown and was forcing me to do her taxes
2 Brain Cells: I woke up in a cold sweat and I'm now staring at the ceiling
FlamingHomosexual: Yikes
he shoe too big: Oh thank God I'm not the only one who has weird dreams like that
FlamingHomosexual: You have dreams where Aqua is dressed as a clown and is forcing you to do her taxes?
he shoe too big: No but I have other weird dreams
he shoe too big: Like last night I had a dream that I was a mermaid and I was singing and dancing with a duck octopus and a dog turtle.
FlamingHomsexual: Oof
Edgy Sonic OC: Damn it her defenses are too strong
2 Brain Cells: Lol what did she do?
Who?: I put a note under my door that said whoever enters my room is triple straight
2 Brain Cells: Those are some strong defenses
Edgy Sonic OC: Ugh I need to let my aggression out in some other way
Edgy Sonic OC changed Terra_did_nothing_wrong username to Horny for Grinch
2 Brain Cells: Jesus bro chill
Edgy Sonic OC: I'm not your bro
2 Brain Cells: Oh come on yes you are
2 Brains Cells: All my friends are my bros
he shoe too big: Am I your bro?
2 Brain Cells: Sure are
FlamingHomsexual: And me?
2 Brain Cells: Yup!
Who?: How about your local Xion?
2 Brain Cells: Absolutely
Who?: Y E S
he shoe too big: Lawful good jock
Edgy Sonic OC: I’m not your friend either
2 Brain Cells: Why not D:
Edgy Sonic OC: I hate Ventus and you are always around him so I hate you by association
2 Brain Cells: Bro what’s your beef with him?
he shoe too big: Is this how straight people talk?
2 Brain Cells: Extremely bold of you to assume I’m heterosexual
he shoe too big: Now that’s my language
Edgy Sonic OC: Our “beef” is all Ventus’ fault
Edgy Sonic OC: He was the one who started insulting me for no reason
Edgy Sonic OC: And you know your boy is no pushover so I fought back
Edgy Sonic OC: Now we be like this
Who?: We finally unlocked your backstory
he shoe too big: Awww you really do love us
Edgy Sonic OC: Shut your mouths
2 Brain Cells: That really doesn't sound like Ventus at all
Edgy Sonic OC: Well that's what happened bitch
Who?: Have you ever tried the not cursing in every single sentence challenge?
2 Brain Cells: A CHALLENGE???
2 Brain Cells: IM GOING TO WIN FOR SURE
Edgy Sonic OC: Shut the fuck up
2 Brain Cells: I'VE WON
FlamingHomosexual: Congrats
he shoe too big: Your mom will be very proud
2 Brain Cells: I know she will
Who?: Are we talking about our mom or his actual mom?
he shoe too big: our mom
2 Brain Cells: This will make up for when I almost accidentally burnt the kitchen down
FlamingHomosexual: When was this???
2 Brains Cells: 10 hours ago
FlamingHomosexual: Ohhhh that's why it the counters were burnt black
he shoe too big: I like that the kitchen was just a straight up a different color and you didn't even question it
FlamingHomosexual: I've been at this school for long enough
FlamingHomosexual: I've grown numb to this sort of thing
2 Brain Cells: Did you guys not see the kitchen?
Who?: Why would I go to the kitchen when there's a microwave in our dorms?
he shoe too big: Yeah same
2 Brain Cells: I'm going to tell Mom
he shoe too big: please don't
2 Brain Cells: hmmm how about this
2 Brain Cells: I won’t tell IF you go to bed
2 Brains Cells: Because it is getting close to 2 am and frankly I’m a lil concerned that you’re still up
he shoe too big: alright DAD I’ll go to sleep now
2 Brain Cells: Good the rest of you should too
Who?: Ugh fine
Edgy Sonic OC: Terra ruins everything again
FlamingHomosexual: Night everyone!
Horny for Grinch sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
Horny for Grinch: Morning everyone, @2 Brain Cells and @Mom what time are you going to Kairi’s?
he shoe too big: Oh my god I forGOT TO CHANGE IT LAST NIGHT
FlamingHomosexual: Once again I hear the loud ass sound of a door being slammed shut echo throughout the hallway.
Notes:
Kudos and comments are very appreciated uwu
Chapter Text
Kairi sent a message to Big Bi Buffoons
Kairi: Hey guys
Kairi: It's ya girl here to do a live report on our movie night
Kairi: Riku luckily managed to not pussy out and is sitting next to Sora
Kairi: Bad news is they aren't talking to each other and are just on their phones instead
Larxene: Ugh come on!
Demyx: Bummer
Zexion: That is heartbreaking to hear but not unexpected.
Riku: It's not my fault guys
Riku: He was the one who whipped out his phone first
Riku: I felt awkward and I wasn't really paying attention to the movie
Kairi: Yeah Sora has been glued to his phone for awhile now. I've never seen him so focused before.
Kairi: What the hell is he doing?
Terra: He's been typing this whole time too
Riku: Is everyone spying on us right now????
Demyx: Wonder who he is texting
Zexion: That is suspicious. You'd think he'd be paying more attention to his crush.
Riku: HE DOESN'T HAVE A CRUSH ON ME
Kairi: Really though, he is typing like crazy
Kairi: What is he doing?
Who? sent a message to Sora's Groupchat
Who?: Okay since I know most of us aren't even watching the movie I'm making a call out post on Sora.
Who?: He's been spamming 'ya like jazz’ in my dms for the past 10 minutes.
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: He's doing that to you too?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: I'm so close to going over there and kicking him
he shoe too big: lol okay I'll stop
MickeyRiku: lol
he shoe too big: See Riku thinks it's funny
Kairi sent a message to Big Bi Buffoons
Kairi: Omg Riku is such a mess
Kairi: “lol” really dude?
Riku: I PANICKED OKAY
Riku: I just wanted to say something so it didn't seem like I had just spent the past few minutes agonizing over what he was doing
Axel: It’s so hard to watch you guys
Riku: Then stop watching aijdfnjffaeoinafjksgrno
Axel: You guys are the most entertaining thing happening right now.
Who? sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
Who?: This movie gave me unrealistic expectations for relationships
he shoe too big: Honestly me too
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: In what way????
Who?: The Bee Movie made me think I could get a nice bee boyfriend or a giant lady gf
Who?: And now I got neither
Riku sent a message to Big Bi Buffoons
Riku: Okay Sora put his phone down what do I say to him!?!?!????!??!?
Axel: Dude just say whatever you want
Larxene: It's really not that hard
Riku: Yes it is I am freaking out
Terra: Breath Riku breath
Edgy Sonic OC sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
Edgy Sonic OC: Why the hell would you want to date a giant lady?
he shoe too big: So your good with the dating a bee part?
Edgy Sonic OC: No shit
Edgy Sonic OC: I'm down to fuck a bee
2 Brain Cells: What?
2 Brain Cells: Wouldn't that hurt?
Edgy Sonic OC: That's what makes it appealing.
Who?: Roxas just let out the deepest, most troubled sigh I have ever heard
MickeyRiku: How would you even kiss a bee or hold it's hand?
he shoe too big: If you really loved it you'd find a way
Kairi sent a message to Big Bi Buffoons
Kairi: Every time he puts his phone down you say nothing
Terra: You're missing your chances!
Riku: IDK WHAT TO SAY
Riku: PLEASE HELP
Zexion: We can't help you with that.
Riku: WHY NOT?????
Aqua: You should speak from the heart. Do what comes natural.
Riku: ajsbbsvshsbsh even mom is watching?????
Aqua: :) of course
ArtHoe sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
ArtHoe: The snacks Aqua brought are so good
Princess.jpg: Apparently she made them herself
ArtHoe: Oh my gosh really?
Riku sent a message to Big Bi Buffoons
Riku: Please guys, can't you at least give me some advice?
Riku: I'm so terrible at these sorts of things
Aqua: Honey you are overthinking it. We can't tell you what to say because it'll be forced and make the situation even more uncomfortable.
Terra: Listen to her
Terra: She knows what she's talking about
Kairi: Sora's your friend, you've been talking to him for years
Riku: Yeah but I've never flirted with him or “made my feelings clearer” or whatever
Aqua: Again that's something you have to do on your own
Aqua: Romance is supposed to be difficult and even a little scary.
Aqua: We can't just give you the answers
Larxene: Translation- stop being a disaster gay
Mom sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
Mom: Yup! I baked all the goodies myself
ArtHoe: That's amazing!!! They are soooooo good!
Mom: Thank you :D
MickeyRiku: Look I get what you guys are saying, I really do, but I just don't know what do.
MickeyRiku: I know I'm panicking and I know I'm a mess but it's because I feel like I could lose everything if I say even one thing wrong.
MickeyRiku: You have no idea how much I love Sora. I've been crushing on him for the longest time.
MickeyRiku: I just can't screw this up you know?
Princess.jpg: Uhhhhhhh Riku
Princess.jpg: …...wrong chat
Who?: oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god OH MY GOD
ArtHoe: I'm happy for you Riku ^.^
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Hey did anyone else see Riku sprint out of the room? What’s that about?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Oh nevermind I just scrolled up.
Edgy Sonic OC: Lol gay
FlamingHomosexual: I feel bad for the peeps not on their phone who have no idea what's going on rn
Kairi sent a screenshot to Big Bi Buffoons
Kairi: sothishappened.png
Larxene: PFFFFFTTTT
Larxene: BEST CONFESSION EVER
Demxy: Wow, even I couldn’t screw things up that bad
Larxene: You sure about that?
Demxy: ehhh I probably wouldn't?
Zexion: What's happening now?
Kairi: Well Sora and Riku left the living room and the rest of us are watching the movie as if nothing ever happened.
Aqua: I think that’s for the best. Those two need some space :)
Terra: I see Riku is online so that can’t be a good sign.
Kairi: Maybe but it’s too early to declare defeat.
Sora sent a message to Riku
Sora: Riku where are you?
Sora: Hey did you lock yourself in the bathroom?
Riku: …..no
Sora: Come on please open the door
Sora: I really want to talk to you
Riku: Listen I'm really sorry
Riku: Really really sorry
Riku: It was a mistake I swear
Sora: Hey hey hey it's okay!
Sora: It’s not something you need to apologize for really
Riku: You're not mad?
Sora: Of course not!? Why would I be?
Riku: Can we still be friends?
Sora: Riku of course! We are always going to friends no matter what!
Sora: Now can you please open the door so we can talk.
Sora: I don't think this conversation should be held over text
Riku: …..You’re right
Riku: I’m feeling really dumb right now for even hiding in the first place
Riku: You can come in now
Who? sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
Who?: I'm at the edge of my seat
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Really? I didn't think Bee Movie was that suspenseful
Who?: No you goober I'm talking about Sora and Riku
ArtHoe: They've been gone for awhile, I hope they are okay
Mom: I'm sure they have a lot to talk about
Who?: But I need to know NOW if my ship is finally canon or not
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: You shipped them?
Who?: You know what shipping is?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU:....
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: no
Horny for Grinch: I can’t believe I missed all of this. Why didn’t anyone wake me up when the drama was going down?
Mom: Because that would have been mean?
Horny for Grinch: I think it was meaner to let me sleep through it
2 Brain Cells: Shhh guys look Sora is online now
Princess.jpg: No one say anything stupid
ArtHoe: Hey Sora
ArtHoe: Is everything alright?
he shoe too big changed he shoe too big's name to Riku's Boyfriend
Who?: AFJDJBAJBAHBXBHAKNBDB
Notes:
I had this chapter planned out a long time ago. I really hope it's as good as I think it is. It's my longest chapter yet so please give me some love in the form of comments and kudos.
Also I've been thinking about writing a spin-off series where I write out (not in text format) some scenes from this fic. Riku's and Sora's conversation in the bathroom would probably be the first chapter. What do you guys think? Is that something anyone would be interested in?
Chapter 7: Aftermath
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
MickeyRiku - Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Princess.jpg - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 brain cells - Terra
Terra_did_nothing_wrong - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Notes:
Hey just a couple things I want to say.
Firstly, I am so shook on how much love I got from the last chapter. I cannot thank you guys enough for all the beautiful comments I received and all the kudos. I'm sorry I didn't reply to all the comments, sometimes I don't know what to say or just forget to respond, but trust me I read and love every single comment I get. I love y'all so much.
Secondly, I'm sorry this chapter took so long. This chapter was a BITCH to write for a couple of reasons. For one, I'm pretty sure my motivation is decided by a drunken God with a roulette wheel, because sometimes I can write 10 pages in one sitting and other times I don't have enough energy to even open the Google doc. Secondly, I got busy with school and work. Lastly, I decided to change a plot point last minute and that meant I had to erase the majority of the chapter and rewrite it. So yeah, that's my excuse.
Alright rant over. I hope you enjoy and thank you guys again.
Chapter Text
Who?: Okay it's been 24 hours
Who?: We gave you space
Who?: We gave you time
Who?: NOW TELL US EVERYTHING
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Why do you even care so much?
Who?: Because I don't have a SO and to cope with the crippling loneliness I gotta project onto other people's relationships.
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: That sounds really unhealthy?????
Who?: Don't worry about it
ArtHoe: I also want to know how the happy couple is doing ^.^
Princess.jpg: I just wanted to say that it is about freaking time
Princess.jpg: Do you have any idea how hard it was to be best friends with both of these oblivious idiots?
ArtHoe: They aren't idiots
ArtHoe: They just needed a little push in the right direction :)
Princess.jpg: More like I had to drag them kicking and screaming
Riku's Boyfriend: Hello lgbt community
Who?: TELL US EVERYTHING
Riku's Boyfriend: ;)
Who?: BRO I NEED DETAILS
Riku's Boyfriend: Well Riku is still recovering from the rollercoaster of emotions he went through yesterday
Riku's Boyfriend: So the two of us are chilling in my room
Who?: Uh huh “chilling” how close together are the two of you?
Riku's Boyfriend: Within a five feet radius ;)
Horny for Grinch: That's gay
Edgy Sonic OC: That's gay
2 Brain Cells: See you two are more alike than you think :D
Edgy Sonic OC: Shut up
Horny for Grinch: Bro I love you to the moon and back but shut up
Mom: Not alike at all
Horny for Grinch: Thank you Aqua!
Mom: >.>
2 Brain Cells: <.<
Riku's Boyfriend: Uh oh Riku realized I'm texting the chat
MickeyRiku: Don't make fun of me!1!! I'm still embarrassed!!!1!!!!11!!!!
MickeyRiku: I don't think I'll ever be able to face any of you guys again!!!!!!! I'll be a shut in for the rest of my life!!!!!!11!!!!!1
Riku's Boyfriend changed MickeyRiku's name to Sora > Mickey
Sora > Mickey: h-huh?
Riku's Boyfriend: I wanted us to have matching names :)
Sora > Mickey:
Riku's Boyfriend: He's blushing right now in case anyone was wondering
Edgy Sonic OC: None of us are that invested in your stupid relationship
Who?: SPEAK FOR YOURSELF
Sora > Mickey: Well since the embarrassment is continuing you can count this as the last Riku sighting.
Sora > Mickey: Bye y'all
Mom: Aww Riku it wasn't that bad
Horny for Grinch: I mean…..it kind of was
Mom: Yes but we aren't going to say so
Sora > Mickey: it's not fair that my biggest secret was just revealed like that ;-;
Princess.jpg: Okay but everyone literally already knew it but Sora soooooo
Sora > Mickey: That doesn't make it better ;-;
Riku's Boyfriend: How about this? I'll share my biggest secret to make it fair.
Riku's Boyfriend: Truth is I was crushing on Riku for the longest time too
Sora > Mickey: That's not a secret!
Sora > Mickey: You told me that yesterday…
Riku's Boyfriend: Yes but now everyone knows!
Sora > Mickey: oh
Riku's Boyfriend: He's blushing again
Edgy Sonic OC: You guys are gross
Princess.jpg: Also something everyone already knew so it’s not really a secret
Who?: owo I got an idea
Who?: We should all share a secret
Riku's Boyfriend: That's a good idea!
Riku's Boyfriend: If all of our secrets are spilled than Riku can't be embarrassed anymore
FlamingHomosexual: Well Xion has to go first
Who?: Bitch you think I won't????
Who?: Truth is, I'm Enderman kin
Edgy Sonic OC removed Who? from Sora's group chat
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: NO
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: NOT ALLOWED
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: BRING HER BACK
Riku's Boyfriend added Who? to Sora's group chat
Riku's Boyfriend: Plz don’t make Roxas angery
Princess.jpg: Again saying stuff we all already know isn't spilling any secrets
Horny for Grinch: I have a secret too
Horny for Grinch: I love and support Terra very much
Edgy Sonic OC: brb I’m gonna go vomit real quick
2 Brain Cells: Bro I can’t believe it, we have the same secret
2 Brain Cells: I love and support you too
Edgy Sonic OC: There goes my lunch
Horny for Grinch: Another secret I have is that I REALLY WANT A NEW USERNAME
Edgy Sonic OC: No :3c
Horny for Grinch: SORA CHANGE IT
Riku’s Boyfriend: I mean I would but I can’t think of anything funnier
Horny for Grinch: >:O
Who?: Rip
Edgy Sonic OC: That's what you get for being horny on main
Horny for Grinch: I HAVE NEVER
Edgy Sonic OC: I mean, I haven’t ever seen it but you radiate so much horny on main energy
Horny for Grinch: AAAAAAAHHHHHHH
Riku's Boyfriend: Anyway anyone want to go back to talking about my new relationship?
Who?: OWO
Princess.jpg: Hell yeah I do, now that you guys are an item I need to set some ground rules
Riku's Boyfriend: Rules??
Princess.jpg: You two are still my best friends so you better not ignore me now that you guys are in a relationship.
Princess.jpg: And for the love of God you better not EVER third wheel me if the three of us ever go out together
Princess.jpg: Or there will be consequences
FlamingHomosexual: Out of curiosity what would those consequences be?
Princess.jpg: If you don't think I could single-handedly take all the joy out of an individual's life you are dead wrong
Edgy Sonic OC: Holy shit? I didn't realize you were this cool?
Princess.jpg: You should hang with me more often then
Edgy Sonic OC changed Princess.jpg username to Badass Princess
Badass Princess: Damn right
FlamingHomosexual: Oh no what are you going to do? Tea party me to death?
ArtHoe: Oh silly Axel let's be real. Kairi could demolish you :)
Who?: Pffftt AAAAA
Edgy Sonic OC: lol gay
FlamingHomosexual: Well I can't beat the power of wlw
Who?: No mortal being could
Riku's Boyfriend: Kairi we would NEVER third wheel you. You are still a beloved friend.
Sora > Mickey: Also our entire relationship only exists because of you
Badass Princess: Never forget that
FlamingHomosexual: Kairi is just murdering people left and right today
Who?: Queen
Riku’s Boyfriend: Alright I think I got sufficient enough attention about my new relationship
Riku’s Boyfriend: I think I’ll turn my phone off and hang out with my new boyfriend ;)
Mom: Have fun you two :)
Edgy Sonic OC: Use protection
Sora > Mickey: Yup I’m officially never going to talk or even look at any of you ever again
Chapter 8: The Chapter Where I Remembered That Ventus Likes Being Called Ven
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 Brain Cells - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Chapter Text
Mom: So a few sources of mine have let me know that SOME of you don’t know how to cook and that SOME people’s diets have been suffering as a result.
Riku’s Boyfriend: Hmmmm wonder who those guys could be
Who?: Yeah that sounds real bad
Horny for Grinch: Those guys should start to eat healthier :/
Edgy Sonic OC: Yeah no kidding
Mom: >:(
ArtHoe: I’m sorry Aqua
Mom: I was not at all referring to you but your apology is concerning
Arthoe: Oh I thought you were talking about me since I can’t cook and I usually eat microwavable meals
Mom: …
Mom: All of you need help.
Mom: And help I shall bring.
Riku's Boyfriend: Thanks but it's okay :) I eat vegetables once in awhile so it's all good
Who?: If it takes more than 3 minutes to make I'm too impatient to eat it
Horny for Grinch: I try but sometimes the temptation to eat cup noodles is too strong
Edgy Sonic OC: And I just don’t care what I put into my body
Mom: Well yes, I figured you guys would be difficult. So I brought reinforcements.
Mom added Saix to the Sora's Groupchat
Saix: Hello cretins.
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Oh my god
Saix: I heard you aren't eating properly.
Saix: You seem to forget that you are all students at a prestigious school. Your health is at utmost importance as it will contribute to your keyblade abilities.
Who?: Please leave
Saix: Thank you Xion, I am here to help Aqua demonstrate how to cook proper meals and how to balance your diet.
Who?: Did you read my message?
Saix: Oh I saw it, I just chose to ignore it.
Axel sent a message to Big Bi Buffoons
Axel: Aqua
Axel: Honey
Axel: Deary
Axel: Pal
Axel: Amigo
Axel: Buddy
Aqua: Yes?
Axel: Why the FUCK did you invite my crush to our group chat
Aqua: To help me teach the others how to cook.
Axel: The truth please
Aqua: You seem to be upset and I don't know why.
Aqua: Can't a girl help her friend out ;)
Axel: ajdbbcjbejejhs Aqua P L E A S E
Zexion: Well now that Riku and Sora are settled it only makes sense to move onto the next pair of love sick morons.
Axel: ajsbbdjsbskowihdb
Aqua: I won't put it those words but yes
Aqua: After Sora and Riku I realized a lot of things. For one, everyone refuses to talk to their crushes. Two, I have the power to get couples together.
Aqua: It's a great power and I will use it responsibly.
Axel: Like hell you will
Saix sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
Saix: Now, who are the irresponsible students?
Mom: That would be Sora, Ventus, Vanitas, Xion, and Namine
Riku's Boyfriend: Damn, why do Kairi and Riku have to be responsible ;_;
Badass Princess: I’m just gonna jump in and say it’s because I’m used to eating like royalty. Before I was a princess of light I’d eat kraft macaroni like the rest of you peasants.
Riku’s Boyfriend: It’s really cool how you didn’t let your princess status get to your head
Who?: I'm just gonna throw Axel under the bus and say that he has a hot cheeto addiction
Saix: Yes that doesn't surprise me at all.
Saix: Is he in this chat?
FlamingHomosexual: Yo Saix
Saix: Hello, how are you?
FlamingHomosexual: I'm good and you?
Saix: Absolutely fantastic.
Edgy Sonic OC: Why does that seem so sarcastic?
Saix: Because I have to deal with a bunch of children on my day off.
Riku’s Boyfriend: You don’t have to
Saix: YES I DO I AM THE STUDENT BODY PRESIDENT
Edgy Sonic OC: chillllll
Who?: You know you are off the rail when Vanitas tells you to chill
Saix: I AM CHILL
Saix: I WILL NOT REST UNTIL ALL STUDENTS REACH THEIR FULL POTENTIAL
Mom: All guilty parties please meet us in the kitchen
Edgy Sonic OC: No
Mom: You response was brief but for some reason I felt an immediate deep and heated rage when I read it.
Edgy Sonic OC: It's what I do
Horny for Grinch: I feel that every time I see Vanitas face.
Edgy Sonic OC: lol suffer
Saix: Please report to the student kitchen commons immediately.
Who?: What's in it for me?
Saix: You'll get to live to see another day.
Who?: Jesus Christ okay I'm coming
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Hey Saix quick question do you like your kneecaps?
Saix: What?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Never threaten Xion again
Mom: Okay so Xion and Namine are here. Only three more to go.
2 Brain Cells: C'mon bro
2 Brain Cells: Eating healthier is the start to living a fuller and happier life.
Horny for Grinch: Bruh I'm here for a good time not a long time
2 Brain Cells: But bro what will I do if I outlive you?
Edgy Sonic OC: Live a fuller and happier life?
Who?: [Minecraft death sound]
Badass Princess: I'm just waiting for the day Terra punches Vanitas
Edgy Sonic OC: the fuck?
Badass Princess: Listen you're cool and all but you can't say you don't deserve it
Edgy Sonic OC: lol yeah your right
Badass Princess: If it makes you feel any better if you two did get into a fight I’d help you out...after Terra got in a few punches
2 Brain Cells: What? I'd never punch him
2 Brain Cells: Well unless he was attacking me
Horny for Grinch: Don't give him any ideas
Horny for Grinch: And fine I'll come but only because bro wants me to
Mom: Two more
Saix: I have the perfect strategy to get one of them
Mom: oh and what's that?
Saix: @Sora > Mickey @Sora > Mickey @Sora > Mickey @Sora > Mickey
Riku's Boyfriend: fack
Sora > Mickey: What's going on?
Saix: Your boyfriend is neglecting his health
Riku's Boyfriend: F A C K
Sora > Mickey: babe…
Riku's Boyfriend: Fine you win
Edgy Sonic OC: gay
Who?: Straightn’t
Mom: one more to go
Saix: And it's our hardest advisory yet.
Edgy Sonic OC: :3c
Edgy Sonic OC: Who? Wittwe owd me owo?
Saix: Yes, you.
Saix: You've always been the most troublesome student.
Saix: My greatest challenge.
Edgy Sonic OC: Stahp youw embawwassin' me >.<
FlamingHomosexual: Sometimes I wish I never learned how to read
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: That's me literally every time I check the chat
Riku's Boyfriend: Why do you keep checking it then
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: For Xion and Axel
Riku's Boyfriend: You sure about that?????
Riku's Boyfriend: You wouldn’t be warming up to us now are you???
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: no
Riku's Boyfriend: You sure about that???
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Positive
Saix: I'll admit I'm stumped on what to do with Vanitas.
Saix: I've learned long ago that detention means nothing to him.
Edgy Sonic OC: I'm a menace that can't be tamed >:D
Mom: Alright everyone let's put our heads together to solve this problem.
2 Brain Cells: Any ideas Ven?
Horny for Grinch: What? Why would I help you?
Mom: Come on, can't you do it for me?
2 Brain Cells: You know Vani the best
Edgy Sonic OC: Call me Vani again bitch and I’ll slice your shoelaces in half
Horny for Grinch: Fine I'll help, there's a pretty simple way to get VANI to come
Edgy Sonic OC: Bitch now I’m definitely not going to come
Horny for Grinch: Do you really want me to have a skill that you don't have?
Edgy Sonic OC: …
Edgy Sonic OC: Fine I'm coming
Chapter 9: Merry Chysler
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 Brain Cells - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Riku’s Boyfriend: You know what I hate?
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Midterms?
Who?: Midterms?
Badass Princess: Midterms?
Horny for Grinch: Midterms?
2 Brain Cells: Midterms?
Flaminghomosexual: Midterms?
Riku’s Boyfriend: No you guys are supposed to ask
ArtHoe: What do you hate Sora?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Midterms
ArtHoe: Wow same
ArtHoe: Especially since I’m so behind everyone else :’)
Badass Princess: Awww don’t worry about that. Physical demonstration of keyblade abilities is only a part of the test. Besides you already have good grades, if you do bad your grades won’t suffer that much.
Mom: Plus I’m holding study sessions in the library!
Saix: The student council is offering tutoring as well all this week.
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yes but what if instead of studying we just skip the exams and go straight to winter vacation.
Sora > Mickey: And this is why you aren’t a keyblade master yet
Riku’s Boyfriend: :0
Flaminghomosexual: Holy shit get wrecked
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Local man murdered by his own boyfriend
Who?: F
Mom: Even though everyone is excited to go on vacation I want you all to do well on the exams. Focus on studying for just two weeks then we can a fun break :)
Who?: Oh yeah speaking of break what is everyone going to do?
Mom: Sometimes I feel like I’m just talking to a brick wall.
Riku's Boyfriend: I'm going back to Destiny Islands. It's warm year round so I'm probably gonna chill at the beach.
Sora > Mickey: With me right?
Riku's Boyfriend: Nah with Kairi
Sora > Mickey: :’(
Riku's Boyfriend: Im kidding I'm kidding
Riku's Boyfriend: I obviously wouldn't pass on the chance to see you in a swimsuit ;)
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Brb I'm going to bleach my eyeballs
Sora > Mickey: Well I'll make sure it'll be worth your while ;)
Who?: Remember when the two of you couldn't even talk to each other?
Badass Princess: They are still complete messes when they talk to each other irl. They just gain a stupid amount of confidence over text.
FlamingHomosexual: What about you? Where you headed for break?
Badass Princess: I'm going back to Destiny Islands as well and probably sleep for two days straight to catch up with all the sleep I've lost
Who?: Wow mood
Badass Princess: Then I'm going to go fucking nuts for Christmas. It is my FAVORITE holiday.
Badass Princess: Destiny Islands is a pretty close-knit community so we all decorate together and we have a huge party in the plaza. I'm part of all the committees that set this all up.
FlamingHomosexual: Not gonna lie that sounds like way too much work
Badass Princess: It is but it's a lot of fun. How about the rest of you? What are y’alls plans?
FlamingHomosexual: Well yours truly along with Saix, Roxas, and Xion are going to Organization 13's castle for break
Who?: Which I'm hella excited for because Organization's Christmas parties are always lit af
FlamingHomosexual: hell ye they are
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: You guys have a weird definition of lit
Saix: For once I agree with Roxas
Saix: For me, Christmas has always meant babysitting a bunch of drunk toddlers
FlamingHomosexual: Oh come on that's the fun of it!
Who?: And since me and Roxas are the babies of the group we get spoiled rotten with gifts
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Yes but at what cost????
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: Demxy plays his sitar too loud. Larxene gets into a fist fight with someone. Vexen puts on a terrible holiday movie. Then someone always accidentally sets the tree on fire.
Saix: And what does our leader usually do to fix the chaos? Absolutely. Nothing. Instead, he gets drunk and starts to belt out 'All I want for Christmas is you' in his terrible, terrible voice.
FlamingHomosexual: Exactly. Fun as hell.
Saix: ugh
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: double ugh
Who?: Aww don't be a grumps. If you want the three of us can hang out in my room together away from the madness.
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: That sounds great actually.
Saix: I would but someone has to keep everyone from killing one another and/or burning the place down.
FlamingHomosexual: So to summarize our winter break is going to be epic
Riku’s Boyfriend: It sounds like it will be
Horny for Grinch: Terra, Aqua, and me are going back to Master Erauqs’ place!!!! I'm so excited!!!!
Edgy Sonic OC: That's weird that no one asked
Mom: Our master is a bit old fashioned so we celebrate a very traditional Keyblade Wielder holiday.
2 Brain Cells: It's basically like Christmas except we throw in some teaching about the Keyblade War and other history.
Horny for Grinch: Yeah there are some boring parts but it's mostly a lot of fun and I just can't wait to see master again!!!
2 Brain Cells: I know right!!!!!
Mom: I can't wait to tell him all about our school adventures.
Horny for Grinch: I can't wait to give him a big old hug
2 Brain Cells: I can’t wait until the four of us hang out together just like old times
Horny for Grinch: Me too bro, me too
Badass Princess: Lol sounds like everyone is going to have a fun time. What about Vanitas and Namine?
ArtHoe: Oh I was just going to stay here
Badass Princess: What? Why?
ArtHoe: Oh….um
ArtHoe: (This is really embarrassing so please don't make fun of me)
ArtHoe: I was considering going back to Twilight Town but I actually don't really know anybody there. I don’t have friends that live in the town. I'm also pretty sure Diz won't be at the mansion so I didn't think there was any point in leaving.
Badass Princess: That's not something to be embarrassed about…
ArtHoe: It’s not?
Badass Princess: No?
ArtHoe: Oh okay, well my plan is to practice my keyblade over the break. I'm going to try to catch up to everyone in my class!
Badass Princess: That's...good I guess?
Riku's Boyfriend: What about you Vani?
Edgy Sonic OC: Didn't I tell you dipshits not to call me that? And imma just going to stay here too
Mom: You don't want to go home?
Edgy Sonic OC: Hell no why the fuck would I want to spend my break with an old fart?
Riku's Boyfriend: old fart?
Edgy Sonic OC: My master
Edgy Sonic OC: He has been bugging me to visit for a while now but he's old and lame and stupid as shit so I'm not going to
Edgy Sonic OC: Plus I would have to go through the hassle of packing my stuff so really the better question is why would I leave?
Riku's Boyfriend: Oh...okay
Saix: Anyway, we should save this kind of conversation for AFTER midterms. Otherwise you'll all be too distracted.
Badass Princess: He's right let's just focus on midterms for now
Who?: Awww
FlamingHomosexual: Damn I didn't know you could be a buzzkill Kairi
Badass Princess: I can be when it's important
FlamingHomosexual: Alright, Alright we'll start studying now
Badass Princess: Good, now everyone stop texting
Kairi started a chat with Aqua, Terra, and 2 others.
Kairi renamed the chat to OPERATION: NO ONE IS GOING TO BE ALONE ON CHRISTMAS
Notes:
If you like this fic, please try out the spin-off I made. It depicts scenes from this story expect not in chatfic form and is instead written out. I worked really hard on it so I'd appreciate if you checked it out. Thank you!
Chapter 10: Christmas Merry
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 Brain Cells - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
ArtHoe: I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED!!!!!!!!!
Badass Princess: Good job I’m so proud of you :)
ArtHoe: Thank you, that really means a lot to me :)
Edgy Sonic OC: Do I even have to say it?
Sora > Mickey: Say what?
Who?: Oh my god even with a boyfriend you are still clueless as ever
Sora > Mickey: What?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Curse my stupid soft spot for complete and utter idiots
Badass Princess: Weird I thought people were usually attracted to opposites
Riku’s Boyfriend: Rude!
ArtHoe: Thank you @Mom and @Saix for the tutoring
Saix: You’re welcome, I’m just glad you passed.
Mom: Me too! I hope I can say the same for the rest of you
Riku’s Boyfriend: Uuuhhhhhh yeah totally
Who?: Def passed mine
Saix: Uh huh well as a member of the student council
Who?: I feel like you get off to saying that
FlamingHomosexual: XIoN PLeassesse
Who?: What?
Saix: As I was saying, as a member of the student council I do get access to everyone’s scores on the midterms
Horny for Grinch: Oh no
Saix: And I will be giving those who did badly an assignment to do over break. If completed there will be points added to your midterm. As to not embarrass anyone, I will be handing these assignments out privately.
Badass Princess: Even if you did say who failed I don’t think anyone would be surprised
Saix: Actually not all the students I predicted would fail, did. A few got better scores than I thought they would and I am proud of those individuals.
Saix: And of course the student that always surprises me, did once again. Though at this point I really shouldn’t be shocked.
Horny for Grinch: Wait who’s that?
Saix: Vanitas of course
Horny for Grinch: Oh lol he did that bad?
Saix: No he got a perfect score
Horny for Grinch: WHAT
Edgy Sonic OC: HA
2 Brain Cells: Good job buddy :D
Edgy Sonic OC: thnk
Horny for Grinch: Did you cheat or something?
Edgy Sonic OC: How the fuck would I cheat shitlips
Riku’s Boyfriend: @Edgy Sonic OC can I copy your homework from now on?
Edgy Sonic OC: Die
Riku’s Boyfriend: That’s fair
Saix: Alright I’m going to visit the dorms of those of you who failed (you know who you are)
Who?: ;-; maybe playing craftmine instead of studying has its consequences
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU: You think?
Kairi sent a message to OPERATION: NO ONE IS GOING BE ALONE ON CHRISTMAS
Kairi: It’s officially after midterms
Kairi: The time has come lads
Kairi: Mission GO!
Aqua sent a message to Vanitas and Terra
Aqua: Hey Vani how are you today?
Vanitas: Uhhhhhh I don’t trust this
Vanitas: Why the hell did you make a chat with just the three of us in it?
Aqua: Just to chat of course :)
Vanitas: What
Terra: We just wanted to chat with our bud :)
Aqua: :)
Vanitas: ?????????
Terra: Midterms are finally over huh?
Vanitas: Thanks for the info Sherlock
Aqua: Yeah and now it's the break
Vanitas: Just spit out what you want
Terra: Okay but before you say no hear us out
Vanitas: no
Terra: I really should have seen that coming
Aqua: Vani, how would you like to spend winter break with us at Master Eraqus’ place?
Vanitas: Holy shit I would love to spend my break at some dumdass strangers house with people I hate
Terra: Wow that was a lot easier than I thought it was going to be
Aqua: Terra…
Terra: Oh
Terra: Okay hear us out man
Vanitas: We're texting
Terra: Read us out then?
Vanitas: Okay
Aqua: Do you really want to be alone on Christmas?
Vanitas: Yes
Aqua: I think that's a lie
Vanitas: And I think you know jack shit about me if you thought I'd agree to go
Aqua: Well, there is one thing I know about you
Vanitas: And that is?
Aqua: You hate to cook
Vanitas: correct
Terra: huh really? That's gonna suck staying here then
Vanitas: What do you mean?
Aqua: No one will be here to cook for you, no leftovers you can steal…
Terra: Meanwhile at Erauqs', Aqua and Master do allllll the cooking
Aqua: And I make lots of cookies and other sweets and just let the boys have at it
Vanitas:
Aqua: Oh and don't forget all the gifts
Terra: Master is loaded after all
Aqua: So loaded that he has several empty guest rooms. Each bigger than the dorm rooms and they come with their own bathrooms.
Vanitas: HA you guys are so dumb. You're literally just giving away free stuff, of course I’m going to take advantage of it
Aqua: So you’re coming?
Vanitas: Yeah to get all the free shit
Aqua: Oh okay, let’s meet tomorrow at the front gate and we can all leave together.
Vanitas: Yeah, okay
Aqua sent a message to OPERATION: NO ONE IS GOING BE ALONE ON CHRISTMAS
Aqua: Mission Accomplished
Terra: Holy shit I can’t believe we did it
Sora: You got Mr.Grumpy!?!!?!?!?
Terra: Yup :)
Aqua: It took a little bit of convincing but we did it
Riku: I'm amazed at your skills
Terra: lol thanks, how's it going on your end?
Kairi: I just talked to Namine and she was thrilled to come to Destiny Islands!
Aqua: Yay that's so good to hear!
Riku: Yeah, she was a little reluctant at first because she felt like she was intruding but we managed to convince her to stay at Kairi's
Terra: Alright we are almost done. Now we move on to phase two.
Kairi: May Kingdom Hearts bless your souls, I'll be praying for ya
Terra: Thanks we’ll try our best
Terra sent a message to Ventus and Aqua
Terra: Hey soooo you'd love us no matter what right?
Ventus: Well that's the most terrifying message I've ever seen in my life but of course I'd love you and Aqua forever
Ventus: Like I'm trying to imagine what horrible thing you could have possibly done and I just can't think of anything that would ever get me to hate you guys
Terra: Oh cool so Vanitas is staying with us over the break
Ventus: You're dead to me
Aqua: Wait, hear us out first Ven!
Ventus: I don't listen to people I hate
Aqua: Come on, you're going to make Terra cry
Terra: I can't believe,,,,My bro,,,:’((
Ventus: Fine fine I don't hate you
Ventus: just WHY?
Ventus: Are you trying to punish me? Is this supposed to be a joke?
Aqua: No it's just a nice thing to do. Vani doesn't have anywhere to go for break.
Ventus: That sounds like his problem tbh
Aqua: >:0 Ven!
Ventus: Not to mention that he DOES have somewhere to go remember? He just doesn't want to go back to his master’s place because he's too cool for that or whatever
Aqua: That doesn't change the fact that he is going to be alone all Christmas break
Ventus: Fine, I get it, you're too nice Aqua. But what about the master?
Terra: Huh what about him?
Ventus: You saw how Vanitas disrespected his own master think about how he'll treat Erauqs
Aqua: Erauqs is a full grown man, I’m sure he can handle one sassy child
Terra: Just one? We leaving Ven here?
Ventus: That was a low blow bro
Terra: Sorry
Ventus: So there’s nothing I can do to change your minds about ruining my vacation?
Terra: Yup
Aqua: Yes
Ventus: UGH well thanks for ruining Christmas
Terra sent a message to OPERATION: NO ONE IS GOING BE ALONE ON CHRISTMAS
Terra: So mission technically complete
Riku: What does that mean?
Aqua: It means Ven’s upset but whatever he can live with it
Sora: Damn
Terra: I’m sure he’ll have fun in the end :)
Riku: Let’s hope so or you guys are in for a rough vacation
Terra: Nahhhhh
Aqua: It’s fine I’m used to handling literal children
Sora: Again damn
Terra: She’s a little on edge right now
Kairi: Thank you for your service Aqua. It’s your dedication and sacrifice that will make this operation a success.
Aqua: I was happy to help...mostly happy to help
Kairi: Well it looks like everything is in place
Sora: Let’s have the greatest Christmas of all time!
Notes:
Hey everyone, I'm working on the next few chapters of Sora's Groupchat Spinoff which will be about their winter vacation. I'm SUPER excited for them to be done so I can show them off. Also, if you haven't already, I'd appreciate if you did check out the spin-off. It would mean a lot to me if you did. Anyway, thank you guys again for reading! I hope you liked this longer-than-usual chapter.
Chapter 11: The one where everyone is gay
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 Brain Cells - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Notes:
Hey so I'm playing Kingdom Hearts 3 and I've fallen back in love with the series. Plus I've been getting a lot of support recently so I'm going to try to get more chapters out. Thanks for all your love and support guys :)
Chapter Text
Xion started a chat with Vanitas and Sora
Xion: Hello my gaymer friends
Xion: Guess what I found online?
Sora: A date?
Xion: Oh hell no lol I'm always gonna be here sipping my no SO juice
Sora: Lol can't relate
Xion: Lol sleep with one eye open tonight
Sora: How you gonna come get me all the way in Destiny islands?????
Xion: I have my ways >:3
Xion: ANYWAY back to the thing I found
Xion: Someone made a pride flag for trans people who play Minecraft and I'm LIVING
Xion: The three of us are finally getting the rep that we deserve :’)
Vanitas: Are those two things mutually exclusive?
Xion: No
Sora: But I only play Roblox :/
Vanitas: Oh then, I guess it sucks to suck
Sora: Roblox is a great way for me to use my imagination and express myself
Vanitas: You're the reason why we can't have nice things
Sora: ;(
Xion: Don't worry Sora, there's representation for you too
Xion: I saw another pride flag for people who are trans and eat sand
Sora: hell yeah babeyyyy!!!!!!!
Vanitas: There's also a pride flag for people with zero brain cells so everyone in your groupchat has representation
Sora: :'c you ain't wrong
Xion: Hey we have one brain cells! We share it amongst ourselves!
Vanitas: “one brain cells”
Xion: Right now it's not my turn with it
Sora: btw how's your vacations going so far?
Xion: Pretty good
Xion: We got to the castle and 0.2 seconds later Axel got hella drunk and confessed his love to Saix
Sora: EXCUSE ME wHAT
Xion: Oh don't worry, this happens all the time
Sora: ????????????? Again what
Xion: Axel is gonna wake up tomorrow morning not remembering any of it and Saix is going to be too much of a pussy to ever bring it up
Xion: happens all the time
Sora: ansbskskkajajajwjsjsjsjsnsjskkakanabjs
Sora: rEALLY!?!?!?
Xion: Like I said before, the gc shares one brain cell and let's be real Aqua hogs it
Sora: Jesus Christ okay give me a second to process that disaster
Sora: Okay moving on. How's it going at Eraqus’ place Vani?
Vanitas: Yo can I fucking vent for a second about that
Sora: Y-you trust us enough to be emotionally vulnerable :’0
Vanitas: Well okay, if you're gonna be creepy about it then nevermind
Xion: Ignore him, give us the tea bro
Vanitas: Alrighty so first off Master bitchtits doesn't like me so that causes a lot of problems
Sora: What why would anyone not like you :(
Vanitas: Because he doesn't like being called Master bitchtits
Xion: aahdhfbfjjska Vanitas PLEASE we've talked about this
Sora: Okay what about some non-eraqus related things
Vanitas: Well Aqua made us make these things called gingerbread houses which didn't last long because Terra and Venbitch kept consuming everything before we could use it
Vanitas: And after that, they had one of their classic “sibling fights” and I just had wait it out until they stopped.
Vanitas: So yeah this fucking sucks
Xion: Big oofs
Sora: F my man, hopefully it gets better?
Vanitas: It won't
Sora: C'mon it's only been a few days
Xion: I bet Christmas will be fun
Vanitas: no
Sora: Hey don't be such a big grump
Vanitas: >:(
Sora: Turn that frown upside down
Vanitas: >:)
Sora: Better!
ArtHoe sent a message to Sora’s Groupchat
ArtHoe: Kairi woke me up early today to watch the sunrise and it was gorgeous!!! Destiny Islands is so pretty :)
Badass Princess: I told you it would be. I'm glad I got to see it with you!
Edgy Sonic OC: G
Who?: A
Riku's Boyfriend: Y
Sora > Mickey: Gay
Riku's Boyfriend: You're finally catching on! I'm so proud!
Sora > Mickey: Yup, I get it now. Sometimes you guys randomly say gay and it's funny
Riku's Boyfriend: Okay maybe one day you'll get it -_-
Sora > Mickey: Wait what?
FlamingHomosexual: Les
FlamingHomosexual: lesbozjx
FlamingHomosexual: lezxsians
FlamingHomosexual: losbeians
FlamingHomosexual: Lesbias
FlamingHomosexual: lesbeas
FlamingHomosexual: LESBIANS LESBIANS LESBIANS
Badass Princess: You good?
FlamingHomosexual: Sorry I'm hungover and the keyboard was spinngin for a second
Riku's Boyfriend: Oh are you now >.>
Mom: You're WHAT
FlamingHomosexual: hungover
Mom: You are NOT supposed to be drinking alcohol
Mom: You are an upperclassmen, you are a huge influence on the younger ones
Who?: We are like two years younger at most :/
Saix: Thank you Aqua. I keep telling him this but he never listens.
FlamingHomosexual: Okay listen up
FlamingHomosexual: I am a big boy
FlamingHomosexual: You can't tell me what to do
FlamingHomosexual: I can do the beers, I can do the weeds, and I can do the anals
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU is now an admin
Riku's Boyfriend: HOW THE FUCK DO YOU GUYS KEEP DOING THAT
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU removed FlamingHomosexual from Sora's Groupchat
Who?: F
SoraKinNoDoublesUwU changed SoraKinNoDoublesUwU's name to Roxas
ArtHoe: Boooo :C
Mom: Namine?
ArtHoe: I like it better when we all have silly names
Mom: So you like your name?
ArtHoe: It's a bit crude but it makes me feel like I'm part of the group so I don't mind :)
Sora > Mickey: God you do not deserve all the shit everyone gives you
Riku's Boyfriend: You deserve so much better :’0
Badass Princess: Big argee
Badass Princess: @ArtHoe you are a precious cinnamon roll, too good too pure for this Earth
Who?: We talking about Enderman again?
ArtHoe: Thank you guys but I think you are exaggerating a little bit
Roxas changed Saix's name to Silence Bottom
Badass Princess: So today's the day Roxas finally burns everything to the ground huh :/
Riku's Boyfriend: (insert gay keysmashing here)
Who?: Wig
Edgy Sonic OC disabled Roxas's admin privileges
Riku's Boyfriend: For real whom's'tve gave you hacking powers????
Edgy Sonic OC changed Roxas's name to dummy flat twink
ArtHoe: Yay ^.^
Badass Princess: Namine NO
ArtHoe: But now we all have funny names
Horny for Grinch: Okay, that's pretty funny I'll give you that
Edgy Sonic OC: I have the power to make your username anything I want so you better stfu
2 Brain Cells: That was a compliment Vani
Edgy Sonic OC: I fucking know that
Edgy Sonic OC: It just doesn't mean anything coming out of Ven’s stupid gay mouth
Mom: Yay you are finally using his nickname :)
Edgy Sonic OC: I just didn’t want to bother writing it all out stupid
Edgy Sonic OC: Go step on a lego
Edgy Sonic OC added FlamingHomosexual to the chat
Silence Bottom: Thank you Vanitas, now will you please undo my nickname as well
Edgy Sonic OC: Silence bottom
FlamingHomosexual: Holy shit what did I miss???? WHO IS SILENCE BOTTOM????
Silence Bottom: This is Saix
FlamingHomosexual: I'm bald
Chapter 12: Minecraft kin
Notes:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 Brain Cells - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Chapter Text
Who?: I finally got Roxas to play Minecraft!!!!!!!!
FlamingHomosexual: Oh shit, how was it?
dummy flat twink: It wasn't what I expected. I kind of get why Xion is so obsessed with it now. I haven't seen the “Enderman” thing that she loves but I really like the monster called “creeper”.
Who?: I've learned that a person's favorite Minecraft character is a great indicator of their personality
Who?: Like think about it, Roxas and Creeper, it fits perfectly!
Riku's Boyfriend: Whoa that is so true!
Who?: Oh my God Sora!!!!!
Riku's Boyfriend: ???
Who?: Let's give everyone a government assigned Minecraft kin :3c
Riku's Boyfriend: Yesssssssss
Riku's Boyfriend: Okay firstly, Riku is a Minecraft wolf
Horny for Grinch: Because he's only tame when you bone him?
Mom: vENTUS
Edgy Sonic OC: God fucking damnit you stole my joke
Mom: >>>>>>>:0000000
Sora > Mickey: Wait why am I a wolf?
Riku's Boyfriend: shhhhh don’t question it, just let me live out my fantasy of having a werewolf boyfriend
Edgy Sonic OC: fucking furry
Sora > Mickey: Oh I see, I'm sorry I can't be what you want ;_;
Riku's Boyfriend: Noooooooo you are what I want
Sora > Mickey: It's okay, I know I can never be as good as Minecraft wolf
Riku's Boyfriend: nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
dummy flat twink: So kin is a character someone likes?
Who?: …...sure
dummy flat twink: So that’s what you mean when you say you’re Enderman kin?
Who?: Yes, they are my main kin but recently I've been kinsidering the ender dragon
Edgy Sonic OC: It would have cost you $0.00 to have not said that
Who?: Vani's kin is silverfish
Riku's Boyfriend: That's just the facts
2 Brain Cells: oh oh what about me?
Edgy Sonic OC: Zombiekin
2 Brain Cells: What do Minecraft zombies look like?
Who?: Zomboi.jpg
Riku's Boyfriend: Jesus that was quick! Did you already have it saved on your gummiphone?
Who?: Perhaps
2 Brain Cells: Omg I love him!
2 Brain Cells: look guys it's me :D
Mom: The picture of that Lego zombie thing is you?
2 Brain Cells: Uh huh :D
Mom: Oh, okay it's very nice!
Mom: Terra please don't read this next part ----[Is Terra okay? Why does he think he's a Lego?]
Edgy Sonic OC: Do you really think that'll work?
2 Brain Cells: It will because I respect Aqua's privacy
Edgy Sonic OC: Hey Terra read the next part----- [you’re an idiot]
Who?: “Horny for Grinch is typing”
Edgy Sonic OC: Ignore him
Riku's Boyfriend: Me next! Me next!
Who?: Easy, Mooshroom
Riku's Boyfriend: Kin accepted
Sora > Mickey: The weird cow thing?
Riku's Boyfriend: Don't insult my kin babe
Who?: Saix is a spider
Silence Bottom: I can assure you, I am human.
FlamingHomosexual: That is the most “spider pretending to be human” line I have ever seen
Silence Bottom: I am not!
Who?: And Axel is a snow golem
FlamingHomosexual: I don't know what that is but I'm sure you're right.
FlamingHomosexual: Wait isn't snow like the direct opposite of me?
Who?: Yes but it fits
Who?: Physically you are hot, but on the inside you are a snowman with a pumpkin for a head
FlamingHomosexual: I stopped reading after you admitted that I'm physically hot
Who?: I meant your fire powers you doofus
FlamingHomosexual: I am pretty hot ;)
dummy flat twink: I know you can't read but she said that she meant your fire powers
Riku's Boyfriend: Oof he snapped
FlamingHomosexual: Again? That's like the fourth time this week. We are slowly turning him into Vani
Who?: Stop getting sidetracked I'm trying to kin assign. It takes a lot of focus and concentration.
Who?: Hey Riku and Sora, who would Kairi be?
Riku's Boyfriend: I'm going to go with Skeleton Archer
Who?: Perfect
Riku's Boyfriend: So all that's left is Namine, Ventus, And Aqua
Who?: Hmmmm hey @Badass Princess I need your gay opinion
Badass Princess: Whaddup?
Who?: You’ve played Minecraft before, right?
Badass Princess: I don't like to admit it but yes
Who?: What monster/animal would Namine be?
Badass Princess: Idk why don't you just ask her?
Who?: Because it wouldn't be any fun if people picked out their own kin
ArtHoe: Yeah Kairi >:/
Badass Princess: ajdbfbkdkaosnjdfn okay
Badass Princess: Uhhhh an Ocelot
Who?: Perfect
ArtHoe: Can I see a picture of that one?
Badass Princess: ajsbxbsjbsb so, wait, you don't know what they are talking about?
ArtHoe: Not a clue, but it's okay because we are all having fun
Who?: :3.jpg
ArtHoe: It's so cute! Thanks for picking that one Kairi :)
Riku's Boyfriend: Idk why but I'm thinking Ghast for Aqua
Who?: Hmmmm I can see it
Who?: She's very strong and mysterious
Mom: I am?
Who?: Yeah a little bit, you don't talk much about yourself soooo
Mom: I see, well if there is anything you are curious about feel free to ask me :)
Who?: You’re popular with the upperclassmen right? So, like, do you got a girlfriend or nah?
Mom: I will no longer be taking questions :)
Who?: Oh okay I'll just *yeets self into the sun*
2 Brain Cells: It's okay, she just doesn't want to admit that she's single
Mom: Can someone please tell me how to leave the chat?
Edgy Sonic OC: The only way to leave is to break your phone
Mom: Someone other than Vani
2 Brain Cells: No
Mom: >:S
Who?: Alright the only person left is Ventus
2 Brain Cells: I'd help but I don't know any of the mined craft dudes
Who?: Honestly I'm not sure who'd Ven kin
Riku's Boyfriend: Vani?
Edgy Sonic OC: He's a fucking chicken
Horny for Grinch: Screw you!
2 Brain Cells: What does the chicken look like?
Who?: Baebyboy.jpg
2 Brain Cells: Ven look how smol and cute it is
Edgy Sonic OC: Omfg can we ban the word smol from this chat?
Riku's Boyfriend: Smol
Who?: Smol
Badass Princess: Smol
Horny for Grinch: Smol
ArtHoe: Smol :D
2 Brain Cells: Smol
Edgy Sonic OC: I hope you all lose your left socks
Horny for Grinch: hey Xion, do you any more pics of the Minecraft chicken and if you do can you dm them to me
2 Brain Cells: Can you send them to me too they are so precious
Who?: You love the chicken that much?
Horny for Grinch: Well, kinda
2 Brain Cells: YES
Who?: You guys, I have three minecraft chicken plushies back in my dorms. You can take two when we all come back from break.
2 Brain Cells: Really!?!?
Who?: Yeah man, think of it as a Christmas present
2 Brain Cells: Best. Christmas. Ever
Horny for Grinch: For real you're the best
Who?: I know
Badass Princess: Why do you have three chicken plushies?
Who?: I have bad impulse control
Silence Bottom: So this whole thing was to see what animal we all figuratively are, correct?
Who?: And monster but ye
Silence Bottom: I see, I believe there's a term for such a thing, I heard some students talk about it before, I believe the word is “fursona”
Silence Bottom: Why did everyone go offline?
Chapter 13: Food
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 Brain Cells - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Notes:
Hey everyone, before the chapter I just wanted to say thank you all so much for all the lovely, lovely comments. I've gotten so much love for this fic, way more than I was expecting, and It's really amazing! The support I've gotten is incredible, I really can't thank you guys enough. But please, don't try to put other chatfics down in the process, lets stay positive!
Thank you and I hope you enjoy!
Chapter Text
Riku's Boyfriend: hoe! Hoe! Hoe! MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCHEs!! Now that it’s finally DICKmas, Santa’s about to slide ;) down your hot, hot, chimney tonight. So lick ;P those juicy candy canes and drink up that creamy eggnog. XP XP Don’t forgot to slide down that XXXtra big North Pole, and make sure your cookie is yummy enough for Santa to eat! Send this to 10 of your baddest bitch elves ;$ ;D X0 If you get 5 back, you're on the naughty list this year! If you get 10 back you better be ready for Santa’s hot CUMlate. If you get 20 back you’ve got the most bitchin peppermint pussy in the North Pole!
dummy flat twink left Sora's Groupchat
Horny for Grinch left Sora's Groupchat
Edgy Sonic OC left Sora's Groupchat
Riku's Boyfriend: wait
Silence Bottom left Sora's Groupchat
Mom left Sora's Groupchat
Riku's Boyfriend: W AIT
ArtHoe left Sora's Groupchat
FlamingHomosexual left Sora's Groupchat
Sora > Mickey left Sora's Groupchat
Riku's Boyfriend: *sigh* I'll see you at the divorce lawyer's office
Who? left Sora's Groupchat
2 Brain Cells left Sora's Groupchat
Riku's Boyfriend: Just the biggest oofs
Badass Princess: Hey Sora, do you take constructive criticism?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Not on holidays
Badass Princess: Respectable
Badass Princess left Sora’s Groupchat
Riku's Boyfriend: ,,,,merry,,,christmas
Vanitas sent a message to Ventus
Vanitas: Hey dipshit, you know you're near my room right now, right?
Vanitas: What are you doing that's making that much fucking noise?
Ventus: Oh I'm so sorry that I'm being loud in the middle of the day in my own home.
Ventus: And all I'm doing is playing with Terra's wooden Keyblade
Vanitas: …..
Vanitas: Okay
Ventus: I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT
Ventus: I MEANT THE TOY WOODEN KEYBLADE HE MADE FOR ME FOR CHRISTMAS
Ventus: WHICH YOU WOULD HAVE KNOWN IF YOU CAME OUT OF YOUR ROOM FOR ONE SECOND
Vanitas: No
Ventus: God, I don't even know why you came if you were just going to spend the whole time in the guest room
Vanitas: I don't see the point of hanging with you guys
Vanitas: Your stupid dad hates it when I use his given name and you three are hazardous to my health
Ventus: Listen, I could give less than a shit, but Aqua and Terra invited you over so the LEAST you could of done was join us for Christmas
Vanitas: I did, I came out of my room earlier
Ventus: Yeah to wolf down the breakfast Terra made. Then you booked it back into your cave.
Vanitas: Yeah? The problem being?
Ventus: You could have at least opened your Christmas presents
Vanitas: Omg Shut The Fuck Up
Ventus: Excuse????
Vanitas: Playing dumb isn't gonna do anything ass because guess what? I don't give two fucks that I didn't get anything
Ventus: What are you talking about!?!?!?!?!?!?
Ventus: Obviously they got you stuff!!!!!!! Aqua even forced me to get you something
Vanitas: What did I just fucking say? Bullying me about isn't going to have any effect dumbass
Ventus: Omg if you really don't believe me then how about??? You look under the tree??? And find out???
Vanitas: Nah
Ventus: You
Ventus: You make me want to say swear words sometimes
Ventus: Everyone tried to do something nice for you, you know!
Vanitas: That was their first mistake
Ventus: OOHHH MMYYY GGGOOODDD
Ventus: Look, Aqua and Terra are going to be really upset if you don’t even unwrap the presents they got you. So what do I gotta do to get you to just fucking open them?
Vanitas: If you tell me what is in my so called “gifts” I'll consider it
Ventus: >:( fine
Ventus: Terra got you the Shadow the Hedgehog video game
Vanitas: HA
Ventus: Aqua got you bathroom equipment like hair gel, mascara, and black nail polish. I think she got you a few bath bombs too.
Vanitas: I don't use mascara and hair gel
Ventus: Suuuuuure and your nails are just naturally black too right?
Vanitas: That is correct
Venuts: Uh huh
Ventus: Anyway Eraqus (that's his name btw) got you a winter coat. Don't worry it's all black and edgy looking.
Vanitas: Pffft I bet he found it in the dump
Ventus: Why you gotta be like that?
Vanitas: Idk, so what didja get me Venny boy?
Ventus: Something that I'm gonna throw away because it's really stupid and I don't even know why I wrapped it
Vanitas: You still have to tell me what it is
Ventus: It's something dumb
Vanitas: If you don't tell me I'm not going open the other gifts plus I'll be ten times ruder to bitchtits
Ventus: >:0
Ventus: Okay fine but don't make fun of me
Vanitas: No promises
Ventus: So remember back when we were friends?
Vanitas: No
Ventus: Shut up
Ventus: Back when we were friends, I made you something for your birthday but then our fighting got real bad sooooo you know
Ventus: Anyway, I thought I might as well give it to you as a Christmas gift since I had to get you something and it’s been stashed away in my closet for like a year and I needed to get rid of it
Vanitas: Cool, I like the part where you told me what it was
Ventus: It's real stupid, I'm going to tear it up in a second
Vanitas: I feel…my destructive urges...rising
Ventus: Fine!!!!!
Ventus: I drew you a stupid picture okay! It’s a picture of us holding hands with our keyblades in our other hands okay!! I also made you a charm of a red star thingie okay!!! Sheesh!!!
Vanitas: cool
Ventus: cool? Thats all you gonna say!?
Vanitas: I mean, yeah, all of these are stupid as shit. But what I got for y’all is just as bad so we're even I guess
Ventus: You got us??? Christmas gifts????
Vanitas: Ye
Ventus: W h e r e
Vanitas: I hid them under your bed
Ventus: ajjsdknsfnsfkooi why?
Ventus: You know what? It doesn’t matter, thank you I guess. Are you going to open your presents now?
Vanitas: Yeah set them outside my door and I’ll grab em when no one is looking like a sneaky little rat
Ventus: Weird metaphor but, fine, as long as it gets you to open them
Ventus: And I'll let everyone know where you hid their gifts since you couldn't put them under the tree like a normal person
Aqua sent a message to Vanitas
Aqua: Vani I know you can hear me knocking
Vanitas: Yeah I can
Aqua: Please let me in
Vanitas: n
Aqua: I just wanted to personally thank you for the Christmas gift, it was very lovely.
Aqua: Wait, are you crying in there?
Vanitas: No I'm just watching some stupid YouTube video
Aqua: Well, okay, can I come in?
Vanitas: Nah
Aqua: Alright, that’s fine, I understand. Again, thank you for the gift. Terra says thank you too and (even though he won't admit it) Ventus loves his gift a lot.
Vanitas: Coolio
Aqua: Do you want me to leave you alone now?
Vanitas: Yeah mom I'm trying to play Roblox
Aqua: Alrighty, Merry Christmas Vani, I’m glad I got to spend it with you
Vanitas: Merry x-mas
Chapter 14: Snails
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
2 Brain Cells - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Notes:
Sorry for the month hiatus, I've been working on a secret project *winks with both eyes*
Chapter Text
Sora sent Riku a message
Sora: Rikuuuu I can't sleep
Riku: Me neither :(
Sora: I’m guessing it's for the same reason
Riku: …...probably
Sora: Well I can’t sleep because I can't stop thinking about our first kiss :3
Riku: akjfhkjaedoiah don’t say it out loud >//.//<
Sora: I can’t stop thinking about how blushy you got and how you started nervously shaking
Sora: It was so cute uwu
Riku: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa shhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Sora: Best Christmas present ever ^.^
Riku: hnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggg stop you’re embarrassing me!!!
Sora: Nope! Making you embarrassed is my favorite thing to do >:3c
Riku: Noooooooooooooo
Sora: It’s a shame we gotta go back to the dorms tomorrow, our vacation will be over
Sora: Less time I get to spend with you :(
Riku: Maybe, but that also means I’ll only be one floor above you instead of on the other side of an island.
Sora: Hehe that’s true :)
Sora: Btw make sure to kiss me lots in front of the others, that way no one will know it took so long to have our first kiss.
Riku: Yeah, I definitely don’t want them teasing us about that
Sora: And also I just want you to kiss me a bunch ;)
Riku: ajdihuadhkjfdhkjsdhkfhuidhcoisdhckusd
Sora: Night Riku, I looooove you~
Riku: AAAAAA
Riku: Goodnight Sora, I love you too, see you tomorrow
Sora: yeah, see ya
Riku’s Boyfriend added Sora > Mickey and 10 others to Sora’s Groupchat
Riku's Boyfriend: Holy shit, that took forever to get all you guys back in the group chat
Edgy Sonic OC is now an admin
Riku's Boyfriend: Understandable
Who?: Yo the groupchat is back? Good, because I have a very important announcement to make.
Mom: oh?
Who?: While me and Roxas were moving back into the dorms we found a garden snail.
Mom: *Roxas and I
Edgy Sonic OC: ohhhh myyyy goddd
Who?: After a long and serious talk, me and Roxas and me and me and Roxas and I have decided to adopt this little child
Who?: Now, we know that parenthood is a hard journey, but we think we want to try it out :)
ArtHoe: Congratulations!!!!
Who?: Thank you
Who?: But the truth is, we already ran into our first problem, we were hoping maybe you guys could help us out?
dummy flat twink: You see, we are very divided on what to name him
Who?: What's a better name? Oblivion destruction and DEATH 5000 or Snaily Boy?
Riku's Boyfriend: Wtf Snaily Boy is such a cute name
dummy flat twink: Thank you! See Xion!?
Badass Princess: ajsbdbsjakak That was your name?????
ArtHoe: Oblivion destruction and DEATH 5000 is a much better name
Who?: Thank you Namine! Geez at least someone has good tastes :/
Silence Bottom: May I remind you that pets are not allowed in the dorms
Who?: DID YOU JUST CALL MY SON A “PET”?????
dummy flat twink: I know you've never known love in your life but try and understand that Snaily Boy is important to us and we will keep him whether you like it or not
Silence Bottom: Well that was unnecessarily rude. I'm only enforcing this rule because I fear for that snail's safety.
Mom: Come on Saix, it's not like it's a dog or cat. I think you should let this one slide.
Silence Bottom: Everyone wants this snail to die, huh?
Mom: Saix >:0
Silence Bottom: Do you think anything can survive under the care of Xion and Roxas?
Mom:........
Mom: I'm sure they'd try very hard to be good parents
FlamingHomosexual: Meh I trust them, I saw them googling “what do snails eat” earlier.
Silence Bottom: My apologies, that obviously makes them fit to take care of pet *eye roll*
FlamingHomosexual: I can't believe you typed that out
Edgy Sonic OC: If anything happens to Snaily Boy I will kill you both.
dummy flat twink: that's another vote for the better name
Who?: See Saix!? Under the threat of death we'll take care of Oblivion destruction and DEATH 5000
Silence Bottom: I'll…..consider asking the teachers for permission
Who?: Thank you
dummy flat twink: March 7 at 1:39am, it’ll be because of blunt force head trauma
dummy flat twink: But I won't reveal the year
Who?: Jesus Christ
Silence Bottom: What is that supposed to mean?
dummy flat twink: You know
2 Brain Cells: WHERE
2 Brain Cells: WHERE AT??
2 Brain Cells: WHERE FRIENDS????
FlamingHomosexual: Uhhh you okay?
2 Brain Cells: HUG?
2 Brain Cells: HUG NOW??
Mom: Terra's a little bit excited to see everyone again
2 Brain Cells: HUG WHEN????
2 Brain Cells: NOW???? HUG NOW????
Badass Princess: Where are you? WHERE ARE YOU?
Mom: We are at the first floor of the dorms.
Badass Princess: Terra I am zooming there right now, get your hugs ready.
ArtHoe: I'm going as fast as I physically can
2 Brain Cells: HUG!!! HUG NOW!!!!
dummy flat twink: What is it about Terra that attracts lesbians?
Sora > Mickey: I'm comign terra I mna cmong p lease I'm corm
dummy flat twink: Uhh nevermind I guess
FlamingHomosexual: I just heard the sound of someone running down the hall in flipflops, panting pretty heavily.
FlamingHomosexual: I hope they’re okay
Who?: I wanna a hug too :’(
dummy flat twink: Then why don't you join them?
Who?: Because that involves moving :/
Silence Bottom: You’re making a great case for yourself in the snail custody battle.
dummy flat twink: Shut the frick up
Who?: Shut the fuck up
dummy flat twink: I appreciate your passion but let's be careful about we say from now on, don't want to accidentally let something slip in front of the baby
Who?: The baby doesn't have any fucking ears it can't hear jackshit
dummy flat twink: Can you not?
FlamingHomosexual: Saix, dude, let them keep the snail
Silence Bottom: Dude?
FlamingHomosexual: Umm yeah?
Silence Bottom: Sorry it’s just...strange that you'd refer to me like that.
FlamingHomosexual: What? I call you dude all the time??
Silence Bottom: I suppose that's true. Sorry then.
Who?: (What the flip is happening?)
FlamingHomosexual: (I have no idea)
dummy flat twink: Are you going to let us keep our son or are you still going to be a lil bitch?
Silence Bottom: I guess I could ask the dorm committee to make extra special permission for you
FlamingHomosexual: It's a fucking snail
Who?: Shhhhh I'll take that over him nagging us about it constantly.
Riku's Boyfriend: #JusticeForSnailyBoy
Who?: You mean Oblivion destruction and DEATH 5000
Silence Bottom: Enough of this nonsense, just name it Snaily Boy DEATH 5000
Who?: That's perfect!
dummy flat twink: I guess I can accept that
Horny for Grinch: Yay! We are going to have a pet in the dorms :D
dummy flat twink: Call my son a pet one more time you expired waffle, I dare you.
Edgy Sonic OC: Oh fuck off you pretentious prick, let him be happy about the damn snail.
Mom: Oh my God is Vani defending Ven?
Horny for Grinch: HE’S NOT
Edgy Sonic OC: I’m not
2 Brain Cells: I’ve waited so long for this moment :’)
Edgy Sonic OC changed 2 Brain Cells's name to Brain Cells? Who’s She??
Silence Bottom: Alright, before this turns into a full on war. I want you to know that the committee approved of the snail.
Who?: YESSSSS
Mom: Congrats!
Riku’s Boyfriend: That’s great news for us, maybe now we should slowly let Saix know about the Meow Wow I got hiding in my room.
Riku’s Boyfriend: That...was not the “dm Riku” button
Silence Bottom: Excuse me what?
Riku’s Boyfriend has gone offline
Chapter 15: Uhhhh the 15th chapter idk
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Notes:
The secret project is almost done y'all ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;( ;( ;( ;( ;(
Chapter Text
FlamingHomosexual: Hey guys, just letting you know that we will be holding my funeral at 8:45pm today at the east training grounds. Please rsvp and this is a bring your own shovel event. Thank you in advance <3
Riku’s Boyfriend: What’s rsvp?
Sora > Mickey: That is not the part you should be focusing on
Riku’s Boyfriend: Rough Sponges Very Prickly
Sora > Mickey: So you think Axel said ‘please rough sponges very prickly’?
Riku’s Boyfriend: That’s my interpretation
Edgy Sonic OC: Damn are there any shovel rentals around here?
Horny for Grinch: Lol look at this loser trying to get a shovel
Horny for Grinch: Meanwhile I can fill a grave faster with my hands
Mom: You guys are so cruel
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Oh no Axel D: are you okay?
FlamingHomosexual: No
Who?: Whoa what the Fuck? What happened!?
FlamingHomosexual: h
Who?: ??????
Who?: DM me hoe
FlamingHomosexual: k
dummy flat twink: No use our sea salt trio chat, I wanna know too
FlamingHomosexual: k
Riku’s Boyfriend: Soooo should we place bets on what we think happened?
Sora > Mickey: Sora that’s rude >:/ he’s clearly in a lot of pain right now
Riku’s Boyfriend: You’re right sorry
Badass Princess: My guess is he did something embarrassing in front of his class
Sora > Mickey: K A I R I
ArtHoe: Hm I think he stuttered while talking to a cute boy :)
Mom: Get you wallets ready, I know exactly what is going on
Riku’s Boyfriend: Really? How do you know?
Mom: By having common sense and problem solving skills
ArtHoe: I wish I had those :/
Riku’s Boyfriend: What’s it like to not have negative critical thinking skills?
Mom: Hell
Who?: Attention all Fortnite gaymers- Axel’s funeral will be held at 8:45pm tonight at the east training grounds. Please come and say goodbye to our beloved friend or offer support to the grieving parties. Rsvp as soon as possible.
dummy flat twink: Dang, what a shame, rip in pieces Axel. You were a dear friend to me. Truly, you will be missed.
Silence Bottom: I am so confused, what is wrong with Axel?
Who?: Oh my GOd
FlamingHomosexual: alkjsadlkjasflajofijaeoiefosehfjsfjnsekjbwkjb
dummy flat twink: I hate that stupid rat bitch
Silence Bottom: I hope you weren’t referring to me.
Who?: He was, you are the reason Axel is dying.
Mom: Hand over the money!
ArtHoe: Wait what?
Badass Princess: Dang I feel stupid now, should of guessed
Silence Bottom: Are you sure it’s because of me? That doesn’t sound right?
Who?: akfhjkdfhkjdshfkjsdhv
Who?:I cnt brteath
FlamingHomosexual: I can’t either ;(
dummy flat twink: Are you playing dumb or are you really this dumb?
Silence Bottom: I have no idea what’s going on.
Silence Bottom: Axel was fine all day. I don’t know what brought this on.
ArtHoe: I don’t have a single clue on what’s going on right now ;~;
Silence Bottom: Oh!
Silence Bottom: He did act a little unusual a little while ago.
Silence Bottom: Is it because of the conversation we had earlier?
FlamingHomosexual: No it’s because it’s a little humid- YES IT’S BECAUSE OF THE CONVERSATION WE HAD EARLIER
Silence Bottom: Oh
Silence Bottom: I don’t quiet understand
Who?: I’m screaming
Silence Bottom: Please, I really don’t know what I did to upset you. Look, you know I’m still a little...inexperienced in this whole boyfriend thing.
Riku’s Boyfriend: lol
Riku’s Boyfriend:
Riku’s Boyfriend: WAIT
Badass Princess: Wait wait wait, am I going insane!?
Badass Princess: Are you two dating?
Silence Bottom: Yes, we have been for a while.
FlamingHomosexual: Yeah and I just found that out today
Mom: I’m going to start crying
Riku’s Boyfriend: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU FOUND OUT TODAY
Silence Bottom: Axel? What do you mean?
dummy flat twink: I can't believe I have to spell this out for you
dummy flat twink: Just because a guy drunkenly confesses to you a few times that doesn’t automatically make you boyfriends.
Silence Bottom: Huh?
Who?: Especially, and I can not stress this enough, if he doesn’t remember confessing.
Silence Bottom: Axel doesn’t remember?
Silence Bottom: And he didn’t realize that we were dating?
FlamingHomosexual: Nah, not until you came up to me and said you wish we did more boyfriend-y things together.
Silence Bottom:
Silence Bottom: That explains why you grew pale and ran away.
Edgy Sonic OC: I haven't laughed so hard in my life
Edgy Sonic OC: You fucking morons
Who?: Please Vanitas, have a heart, these poor gay idiots are dying
Edgy Sonic OC: I had my heart surgically removed years ago
Mom: Can you give me the name of the surgeon, please? The stress from taking care of all you gays is going to give me a heart attack one day.
Edgy Sonic OC: Remove your heart yourself pussy
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Congrats you two! I’ll make you a cake :)
Badass Princess: Um, so wait, are you guys a couple now?
Silence Bottom: I’m
Badass Princess: It’s okay bottom, take your time
Who?: Kairi pLEASE
Silence Bottom: Axel and I need to have a serious chat now. In private of course.
Who?: Fuck that, have your “chat” in the gc
Silence Bottom: Why would I do that?
Badass Princess: Because we are all gay and we crave drama
ArtHoe: Tea time @everyone! Sip, sip!
Who?: ajdjakhfjkhfjs perfect now everyone is online
Mom: Most of us were anyway.
Horny for Grinch: Whoever pinged the chat is getting there breathing privileges taken away
dummy flat twink: Sorry lookalike but everyone has to be here to roast Axel.
FlamingHomosexual: Haha well you heard them Saix, we gotta give the kids what they want.
Silence Bottom: Do you really have no sense of privacy or shame?
FlamingHomosexual: There's nothing to be ashamed of
FlamingHomosexual: We are just two big goofballs who made a goofball mistake
FlamingHomosexual: I don't think we need a big, serious conversation about this. I mean, what more is there to say? My drunken feelings are the same as my sober feelings. I don’t see why we gotta stop dating.
FlamingHomosexual: And hey, I’ll be a good boyfriend now that I actually know that I am your boyfriend
FlamingHomosexual: So what do you say? Can we keep dating?
Silence Bottom:.........perhaps
Silence Bottom left Sora’s Groupchat
Who?:ajhdjahdjahdjkhas
FlamingHomosexul: lol I’ll go talk to him
dummy flat twink: I will never get over how dumb this whole situation was
Who?: It does finally explain why Saix has been acting weird recently
Mom: I can’t believe that no one, especially Axel, realized that Saix thought they were dating.
dummy flat twink: He’s so emotionally awkward, I have no idea what Axel sees in him.
Edgy Sonic OC: That’s probably his kink
dummy flat twink: Shut up
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Well now that the emotional outburst of the week is done...anyone want to go out to eat with me?
Horny for Grinch: I do bro!
ArtHoe: Me too!
Badass Princess: Yeah, sure
Riku’s Boyfriend: And just like that everyone has moved on
Chapter 16: Rp
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora >Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Notes:
Secret project is done and posted! So now I can focus on chatfic!
Chapter Text
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Hello welcome to Macdonald’s can I take your order?
Badass Princess: Hi can I get a uhhhhhhhhhhhhh um uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: It’s okay ma’am take your time
Badass Princess: Yeesh...what do I want...uhhhh
ArtHoe: Excuse me? Can I order?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Sorry but this customer was here before you
ArtHoe: Rats >:S
Riku’s Boyfriends: What is happening right now?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Now, ma’am. How can I help you?
Badass Princess: Thank you, can I get uhhhhhhhh ooh uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: …...
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Ma’am a line is forming
Badass Princess: Excuse me, do you know who I am?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Um?
Badass Princess: I’m a princess of light, bitch.
Edgy Sonic OC: What the actual fuck?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: I am so sorry, I didn’t realize we had such an honorable guest at this humble establishment. Please, take your time.
Badass Princess: Hmph! About time I was treated correctly. Anyway can I get uhhhhhhhhhhhhh…………………………...borger
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Absolutely, we’ll fetch our most high quality frozen patty for you. Now, would you like fries with that?
Badass Princess: (softly but with a lot of feeling) oh god oh god oh shit fuck not again
Badass Princess: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Mom: Not to interrupt...whatever is going on, but are you guys alright?
ArtHoe: Oh my God I’ve been standing in this line forever!
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Lesser customer, please be silence. The princess is speaking.
Badass Princess: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
ArtHoe: She wants fries! Okay! She wants the stupid fries!
Badass Princess: She’s...she’s right! I want the fries.
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Awesome, we’ll have that out in a jiffy!
Who?: This story is so gripping, so tense. I’m at the edge of my seat.
dummy flat twink: What? What!!!
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: And finally, did you want a Mctoy with that?
Badass Princess: (clutches fist, a single tear rolls down face) Oh god no, why why why WHY
ArtHoe: (places a hand on her shoulder) it’s going to be okay, I promise.
Badass Princess: (tear fall freely now) I just- I don’t know if I can keep going. I’m not strong enough.
ArtHoe: (wipes away tears) It’s okay princess, you are strong. I think...I think you want that mcToy
Badass Princess: You're right! Amazing! Yes, I want a mcToy.
Who?: I am pissing myself laughing. You guys good??????
Mom: Where are you guys even? I can’t find you anywhere?
Who?: You’re looking for them?
Mom: Yes, though I doubt Kairi and Namine are in any danger, I’m worried about Terra
Edgy Sonic OC: They’re fine, they are just being dumb.
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Okay that’ll be $5.99
Badass Princess: (Does the transaction and steps out of line)
ArtHoe: Finally!!!!
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Yes, go ahead
ArtHoe: Hi, can I get a number 2 with no lettuce, no tomato, no onions, and no pickles. Can you also make it vegetation please, thank you :)
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Uh so, you uh, just want the buns?
ArtHoe: No bun either please, I’m allergic to gluten.
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: All that’s left is the ketchup, you want just the ketchup ma’am?
ArtHoe: Did I stutter?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Are you guys gonna explain or?
Horny for Grinch: (Enters the MacDonald’s crawling on the ceiling while screaming) NUGG!
Edgy Sonic OC: Oh my fucking God
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Coming right up! Do you want fries with that?
ArtHoe: Hey! It’s my turn!
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Oh right, sorry! You wanted just a cup of ketchup right?
ArtHoe: I’m actually allergic to paper :\
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Ma’am why did you come to a MacDonald’s?
ArtHoe: Rude! Let me see your manager
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Ah, sorry, do you want me to squeeze the ketchup directly into your mouth?
ArtHoe: That be delightful! :) thank you
Horny for Grinch: (Crawls into the kitchen)
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Oh fuck not again! (Grabs broom and starts swatting Ven) Shoo! Shoo!
Horny for Grinch: (gallops away with a single fry in mouth)
Sora > Mickey: Please, I am shaking and crying, what is happening?
Riku’s Boyfriend: I’m with him now and he’s legit shaking and crying over this
Badass Princess: Good! Now you know how we feel :):):):)
Riku’s Boyfriend: Who hurt you?
ArtHoe: Disney Town
Sora > Mickey: W HAT?
Badass Princess: Alright! So Nams, Terra, Ven, and I all went to that world of furrys for lunch. We stopped at this burger place called MacDonald’s, thinking it be all fine and dandy. We were innocent back then.
Riku’s Boyfriend: What in the name of Kingdom Hearts happened?
Badass Princess: MacDonald’s is a place where normal morals and the laws of man don't apply.
ArtHoe: We are losing our fucking minds right now :)
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: This is a godless realm
dummy flat twink: What
Horny for Grinch: I’m gonna to kick the soda machine because hahahahahaa who gives a SHIT???
Mom: Please don't Terra stop him
Brain Cells? Who's She??: Why? A Possum did it like 5 minutes ago?
Silence Bottom joined Sora’s Groupchat
dummy flat twink: You are not welcomed back here
Silence Bottom: What is happening?
Silence Bottom: Why are you four talking nonsense?
ArtHoe: How’d it go with your boyfriend?
Silence Bottom: Were you four…what’s the word?
ArtHoe: How’id it go with your boyfriend?
Silence Bottom: Roleplaying, I believe?
ArtHoe: How’d it go with your boyfriend?
Badass Princess: Answer her question
dummy flat twink: Please don’t, I want to know as little about Axel’s and Saix’s relationship as physically possible
FlamingHomosexual: Lol u guys were roleplaying?
ArtHoe: How’d it go with your boyfriend?
Horny for Grinch: Hey, are you making fun of roleplayers >:/
FlamingHomosexual: Uhh…...no?
Edgy Sonic OC: Lol that means nap boy roleplays for real!!!
Horny for Grinch: Really? You gonna say that as if we didn’t do online sonic roleplays together freshman year
FlamingHomosexual: WHAT
Edgy Sonic OC: pffft he’s lying
Riku’s Boyfriend: Oh no was the nickname I gave you too accurate? :(
Horny for Grinch: Nah we rp’ed canon charters
Riku’s Boyfriend: owo!
Horny for Grinch: He was usually Shadow or Tails
Riku’s Boyfriend: TAILS!?!?
Edgy Sonic OC: Fuck it I’m leaving
Riku’s Boyfriend: Hey there’s nothing wrong with roleplaying! I do it sometimes on Roblox!
Badass Princess: And there goes the rest of us
ArtHoe: How’d it go with your boyfriend?
ArtHoe:
ArtHoe: :( okay I guess I’ll never know
Chapter 17: New members of the gang
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Notes:
What two month hiatus?
Chapter Text
Who?: lol that was the worst thing ever
Horny for Grinch: God I know!!! I hate field assignments
Who?: SAME
Riku’s Boyfriend: The concept is pretty good like going out on your own to defeat heartless for school credit should be fun.
Riku’s Boyfriend: But noooooooo we aren't allowed to have fun
Horny for Grinch: The teachers give us a stupid grocery list of heartless types to kill and ugh!!!! it's so tedious
Riku’s Boyfriend: I know right!!!! God Miss Ava why can’t you just let me live???
Mom: You three will complain about anything school related huh? :/
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yup
Who?: pretty much
Horny for Grinch: Fuck school
Mom: Ven!
Horny for Grinch: Sorry I shouldn’t have said that
Horny for Grinch: What I meant to say was F U C K SCHOOL
Mom: *not mad but disappointed sigh*
ArtHoe: Aww you guys don’t like field assignments? I really enjoy them, especially today’s
Riku’s Boyfriend: How come?
ArtHoe: Oh, because I made some friends in the world I went to!
Badass Princess: Yay! I’m so happy for you!
ArtHoe: Thanks :) but that reminds me. I was gonna ask, my new friends aren’t keyblade wielders, but can I add them to the groupchat?
dummy flat twink: No
ArtHoe: Oh okay
Badass Princess: wtf why not?
dummy flat twink: no
Badass Princess: Good thing your opinion doesn't matter
ArtHoe: Roxas’ opinion matters :( he's apart of the gc
Badass Princess: Okay and?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Hell yea!! the more the merrier
Riku’s Boyfriend: Just give me their numbers and I’ll add them
dummy flat twink: no
ArtHoe: If it makes people uncomfortable then we don’t have to add them.
Badass Princess: Roxas isn’t uncomfortable he’s just a cranky baby who missed his bedtime
dummy flat twink: die
Riku’s Boyfriend: That is true but Namine has a point
Riku’s Boyfriend: This gc is for everyone and if we are going to invite new people we need at least the majority approval
ArtHoe: @everyone would it be okay if we added new people?
Silence Bottom: I was about to say yes but, then I scrolled up and learned that these new people do NOT wield keyblades. Literally the first they tell you is to keep the keyblade's power a secret. So, I’m sure I’m speaking for everyone when I say: Absolutely. Not.
Edgy Sonic OC: Sure
Who?: Sounds good
Sora > Mickey: Yeah do it
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: I would love new friends
Horny for Grinch: Lol do it
Flaminghomosexual: Do it
Riku’s Boyfriend: Welp! That’s the majority :)
Hayner, Pence, and Olette joined Sora’s Groupchat
dummy flat twink: leave
dummy flat twink: leave
dummy flat twink: leave
dummy flat twink: leave
ArtHoe: That isn’t nice :(
dummy flat twink: leave
dummy flat twink: leave
Badass Princess: Hello Namine’s friends, welcome!
dummy flat twink: leave
Olette: What’s up?
Pence: Howdy
dummy flat twink: leave
dummy flat twink: leave
Riku's Boyfriend: Hi new friends!
dummy flat twink: leave
Olette: What’s your problem dude?
Pence: Dummy flat twink? Lmao what does even that mean?
Who?: Don’t mind Roxas, he has grumpy bitch disease
Olette: Oh shit is it terminal?
Who?: Yes
Olette: Lol rip
Mom: Welcome! We are always pleased to meet new friends :)
dummy flat twink: leave
Silence Bottom: I’m doing my best to remain calm in this situation. I know some of you aren’t the smartest but I never expected any of you to violate one of our most sacred traditions without any hesitation.
Edgy Sonic OC: Alright drama queen
Pence: Huh? What’s he talking about?
Olette: Also why hasn’t Hayner said anything yet?
Hayner: Sup, I'm Hayner, the local Cryptid hunter. I once kissed Big Foot behind a 7/11 and my goal in life is to spit in God's face.
Olette: Oh yeah, I forgot that he likes to be fashionable late to everything
dummy flat twink is now an admin
dummy flat twink kicked Hayner from Sora’s Groupchat
Pence: Holy shit
Olette: f
Who?: Ah, so you too are a fellow gamer
ArtHoe: ww,h,y wou'ld youu do th,at. he waas my friend r,,oxa s
ArtHoe: he',s so ssOOrryy Hayner.... he iS soo so sorrr y please let him just ba;;ck i
Who?: What the fuck does that say?
ArtHoe: Please, he's my only friend in the whole universe. Please let him back in.
dummy flat twink: no
Badass Princess is now an admin
Riku’s Boyfriend: Is it really that easy to become an admin?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Seriously how are you guys doing that???
Sora > Mickey: I’ve tried several times and idk how ;-;
Horny for Grinch: yeah, same
Badass Princess added Hayner to Sora’s Groupchat
Badass Princess disabled dummy flat twink’s admin privileges
Edgy Sonic OC disabled Badass Princess’s admin privileges
Pence: You guys sure are in a power struggle
Horny for Grinch: it just how it be
Hayner: What the fuck is up? Who wants to go huh? Who’s trying to start a fight?
Edgy Sonic OC: Me
ArtHoe: NO!! That wouldn’t be fair since you have a keyblade :,(
Flaminghomosexual: Yo I can hear Saix screaming from my dorm room
Edgy Sonic OC: I am going to BEAT the SHIT outta of HAYNER with my KEYBLADE the magical weapon only a few CHOSEN ones have
Hayner: Holy shit I want one!
Olette: Was that the thing Namine used against those buggy creatures?
ArtHoe: Yup!
Flaminghomosexual: Guys he’s gonna go into berserk mode
Edgy Sonic OC: Hey! New peeps! Wanna know about our super secret powers?
Hayner: Boy would I!?
Flaminghomosexual: Can you please chill???????
Olette: Are we breaking some kind of rule?
Edgy Sonic OC: yeah
Olette: Sweet >:)
Who?: Basically we got these magically giant keys that we can swing at darkness and bad guys to beat the shit outta them.
Flaminghomosexual: The screaming has turned into howling
Who?: And only a select few have the power to wield a keyblade.
Hayner: Cool gimme one
Who?: No
ArtHoe: The school I was telling you guys about is a school for keybladers :) all of us are training to be keyblade masters
Flaminghomosexual: Guys this is serious
Riku’s Boyfriend: Once we are masters we get to travel between worlds and protect them from darkness.
Pence: Worlds?
Flaminghomosexual: He’s really really mad and that’s really really not good.
Edgy Sonic OC: There is more than just your world dipshit
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yeah there’s a ton of worlds in the universe and most people don’t even know that!
Hayner: that's gnarly
Olette: rad
Pence: Awesome
Flaminghomosexual: Yeah that was definitely the sound of Saix’s door being torn from it’s hinges
Who?: Welp it was a good life
Pence: lol what?
Pence:...
Pence: No one has talked in over two hours
Pence: You think these guys are okay?
Olette: Rip our new friends
Hayner: f
Olette: f
Pence: f
Chapter 18: Late night foolery
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Chapter Text
ArtHoe: Do you think that in worlds where the citizens are anthropomorphic animal, the ones who draw human art are considered the weird ones?
Who?: Namine, I say this as a friend who loves you very much, are you fucking okay??
ArtHoe: I’m not quite sure where this concern is coming from?
Who?: It is………
Who?: ……...3 in the morning
ArtHoe: Time is irrelevant, this is an important question
Who?: The time is a major factor in my concern
Riku's Boyfriend: Shhhhhh let her speak
ArtHoe: You think the anthro animals that draw human versions of themselves are outcasted from society?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Wow they might be
Edgy Sonic OC: Lol fucking humany
ArtHoe: And I bet the ones who wear humsuits are mocked and ridiculed
Riku's Boyfriend: This is just…...so profound. Really puts into perspective how our own society treats furries.
Who?: I don't think your friends sometimes calling you a furry counts as being treated unfairly in society.
Hayner: Not true! Furry discrimination is still alive and rampant! I know from first-hand experience :(
Who?: Oh hey another kiddo who is up at a unreasonable hour
Olette: I’m here too
Pence: Lol same
Riku’s Boyfriend: Hayner I am so sorry you had to experience such hatred in this day and age.
ArtHoe: What happened D:
Hayner: I was kicked out of my elementary school's choir because I kept biting another kid's ankles
Riku’s Boyfriend: smh
ArtHoe: So unfair :(
Who?: Did that kid deserve it?
Pence: That kid was me
Who?: Oh
Hayner: And he most definitely deserved it because he stole my beyblades
Pence: We’ve been over this a million times NO I DIDN’T
Olette: Oh Hayner knows, he’s just being dramatic
Who?: Then who was the real culprit?
Pence: It was Olette and she let me take the blame for it!!
Olette: Hey I didn’t know! Look, one day I was digging in the school yard and found some beyblades so obviously I took them.
Olette: How was I supposed to know that Hayner buried them there to keep them safe?? And how was I supposed to know that you were the only person he told where the hiding spot was?
Pence: You still could have said something when he randomly attacked me in the middle of us practicing Mary Had a Little Lamb!!!!
Olette: adfdklfjalfkjlak I’m sorry okay?
Hayner: And that's the story of how our lifelong friendship began :)
ArtHoe: So sweet :)
Riku's Boyfriend: What an amazing tale! Gripping read start to finish
Edgy Sonic OC: I’d almost started liking Hayner because I too enjoyed biting people as a child. But you like beyblade? Fucking gross
Who?: As a child? You bit Axel’s hand last week????
Riku’s Boyfriend: Hey >:( Beyblade is awesome though!!!
Edgy Sonic OC: I didn't think there could be anything worse than your Roblox obsession.
Riku's Boyfriend: You just don't how to let it ripe :/
Edgy Sonic OC: It's a letter off from keyblade and it irks me
Who?: Not to derail this conversation that I'm totally invested in, but what's everyone doing up this late?
Who?: I already know Sora, Vanitas, and I don't sleep but what's the rest of y'all's excuse?
ArtHoe: I suffer for my art :’(
Who?: What are you working on?
ArtHoe: Some humansona art that someone online commissioned
Edgy Sonic OC: I fucking wish I was Jared 19
Who?: Please tell me you’re joking
ArtHoe: Wow judgmental much? :/
Who?: Please sleep
Olette: Why sleep when it's the perfect time for crime?
Riku's Boyfriend: Uhhh well that isn’t suspicious at all
Edgy Sonic OC: Crimes? >:3c
Hayner: Crimes >:)
ArtHoe: What are you guys doing?
Pence: What we do every night. Skateboarding in skateboarding prohibited areas.
Hayner: We the crime gang
Olette: Crime gang
Pence: Crime gang
Edgy Sonic OC: Oh lame I thought you guys were doing real crimes :/
Hayner: Later tonight we are also going to steal some of the fake, decorative plants outside of this fancy restaurant
Edgy Sonic OC: Now you’re talking!
Who?: What would you even do with fake plants?
Hayner: yummy crouch
Who?: O
Mom: I'm unfortunately awake now
ArtHoe: Good morning Aqua ^.^
Mom: It is 3:45am
Who?: Yeah, morning
Mom: Sigh
Riku's Boyfriend: Why are you up?
Mom: I had a dream where Terra had a tummy ache and needed my help so I instinctively woke up.
ArtHoe: Awww that’s sweet :)
Edgy Sonic OC: If I were you I’d strangle Terra just for showing up in my dreams.
Who?: Hey off-topic question but do you think Snaily Boy DEATH 5000 has a humsona?
Mom: I….I think I need to go back and read the conversation you guys had earlier
Edgy Sonic OC: You really don’t
Olette: Who the hell is Snaily Boy DEATH 5000?
Who?: My son who is also a snail
Olette: Ah
ArtHoe: I think Snaily Boy’s humsona would be on the shorter side and have messy brown hair.
ArtHoe: Oh and he’d have freckles and glasses
Who?: Namine you opened my third eye
ArtHoe: I'll draw some concept art for him later
Edgy Sonic OC: Please shut the fuck up about the fucking snail’s humsona
Olette changed Olette’s name to Snaily Boy’s Humsona
Edgy Sonic OC kicked Snaily Boy’s Humsona from the Sora’s Groupchat
ArtHoe: Nooooooo plz bring her back :<
Riku’s Boyfriend added Snaily Boy’s Humsona to Sora’s Groupchat
ArtHoe: Gay rights :D
Mom: Well I’m caught up on everything and I’m not a fan of your “crimes”
Hayner: What are you, a cop?
Mom: I know asking you guys to stop isn't going to do anything, so at the very least can you guys wear helmets and knee pads?
Snaily Boy’s Humsona: Hayner just screamed "fuck you" and threw off all the protective wear he had on
Mom: Why do I even try ?
Pence: Oh Great! Now we gotta go home because Hayner tried to do a kick flip and immediately fell and got himself hurt.
Snaily Boy’s Humsona: Night ruined >:(
Mom: IS HE OKAY??
Pence: Yeah, he just scraped his knees and started tearing up so we gotta go home now
Mom: THANK GOD
Snaily Boy’s Humsona: Night everyone
ArtHoe: Goodnight!
Riku’s Boyfriend: Goodnight
Who?: Night
Chapter 19: Hewwo
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink- Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC- Vanitas
Silence Bottom- Saix
Notes:
I wrote this like two months ago and it's just been in my google doc, staring at me...menacingly.
Also I can't, for the life of me, think of chapter titles.
Chapter Text
Terra sent a message to Aqua
Terra: AQUA
Terra: EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY!
Aqua: Huh?
Terra: There’s something I have to tell you, it’s urgent.
Aqua: If it’s important you probably shouldn’t tell me over text
Aqua: I’m in my dorm right now if you'd like to come and talk to me
Terra: No you don’t understand!!!!!!!
Terra: It’s so urgent that I can’t wait to walk all the way back to the dorms to tell you.
Aqua: Fine, what's wrong?
Terra: Okay, I have a story to tell you, but you might want to be sitting down.
Aqua: You’re scary me
Terra: You need to be sitting down Aqua
Aqua: Okay I’m sitting. Please tell me what happened.
Terra: Alright, I will, but I first have to explain how I got into the situation where the story takes place.
Aqua: Um, okay?
Terra: So, I’m a simple man with simple needs. I like to poop in peace.
Aqua: ?????
Terra: And sometimes I like to use the bathrooms in the school building after class since they are usually empty around that time, again because I like to poop in peace.
Aqua: This isn’t really an emergency, but thanks for sharing, I suppose?
Terra: No no no this is just the set-up to the story
Terra: So
Terra: I was in the empty bathroom, I had finished my business and I was just about to leave the stall when two people burst through the door and came in loudly yelling at each other.
Terra: I looked through the crack in the stall and saw that it was Ven and Vani. It didn’t seem like they realized I was there because they kept arguing. So I stayed inside and listened in.
Aqua: Terra >:0 That’s eavesdropping and it’s rude.
Terra: I know I know. BUT they were arguing about why their friendship fell apart a year ago. And, well, I was curious! We still really don’t know the whole story.
Aqua: Yeah, I know. I guess I can’t blame you, I’ve wanted to know for a very long time too. Did you finally get the answer?
Terra: No
Terra: Because, well, you see
Terra: Are you sitting down?
Aqua: Yes, now please tell me what happened?
Terra: Okay
Terra: so
Terra: um
Aqua: Terra?
Terra: In the middle of their argument, Ven grabbed Vani by the collar and kissed him.
Aqua:
Aqua:
Aqua:
Aqua:
Terra: You going to keep pressing enter or?
Aqua:
Aqua:
Aqua:
Aqua:
Aqua: hE WHAT
Terra: Planted one right on Vanitas' lips
Aqua: He
Terra: The both of them got really blushy and awkward.
Aqua: He what?
Terra: Then Vani said “You can’t keep doing that to end arguments”
Aqua: As
Aqua:
Aqua: AS IN THAT WASN’T THEIR FIRST KISS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!????????
Terra: Then they both went silent and left the bathroom.
Aqua: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Terra: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Aqua: IT’S ABOUT TIME
Terra: I KNOW RIGHT
Aqua: THAT TOOK FOREVER
Terra: IT REALLY DID
Aqua: But wait...why didn’t Ven tell us that they were dating?
Terra: I really wish I knew :(
Aqua: We’re supposed to be his best friends. This is major news to withhold from your friends.
Terra: I know
Aqua:OH THEY BETTER HAVE NOT BEEN ON THEIR FIRST DATE YET
Aqua: I’M THE ONE WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO HELP VEN PICK OUT AN OUTFIT, AND GIVE HIM ADVICE, AND BUY HIM PERFUME, AND DO HIS HAIR
Terra: Priorities Aqua.
Aqua: Is there anything more important than that???
Terra: Yes!!! Like am I still Ven’s bro? Is he still my little buddy??
Aqua: Of course he is! Why would you think he’s not D:
Terra: Because he didn’t tell me about this and we tell each EVERYTHING
Terra: Everything Aqua!
Terra: now that he has an emo boyfriend maybe he doesn’t need a big bro anymore
Aqua: Oh Terra that isn’t true
Aqua: I’m sure Ven had his reasons for keeping it a secret
Terra: :’(
Aqua: Awwww, I’m sure he’ll tell us soon
Aqua: And when he does I’m going to freak out again
Aqua: Oh my god oh my god oh my god Terra they kissed Terra
Aqua: They kissed I’m still in shock
Terra: Hehehe I know right :) It is really exciting
Aqua: I’m so glad it finally worked out for them
Terra: I was getting really tired of watching their romantic frustrations
Aqua: As was I
Terra: I hope they are both happy
Aqua: I’m going to have to have the “don’t break his heart” talk with both of them
Aqua: Oh wait! Terra what do we do now?
Terra: Um pretend like we don’t know what happened
Aqua: That's lying and you know I don't like lying
Terra: Its not technically lying if we don’t specifically say we don’t know
Terra: We will just act like everything is normal and not bring it up!
Aqua: :/ You aren’t very good at acting...or keeping a secret
Terra: Nah I’ll be fine. I'll just act natural.
Aqua: Sigh. I don’t like it but I guess that’s what we have to do
Terra: That’s the spirit!
Sora’s Groupchat
Edgy Sonic OC: Eat a dick
Horny for Grinch: Stub your stupid toes
Edgy Sonic OC: Oh wow good one
Brain Cells? Who’s she??: Wow I missed a lot of messages what’s happening?
ArtHoe: Vani and Ven are fighting again :(
Terra: WAIT REALLY?
Who?: Is this…shocking? This happens at least once a week?
Brain Cells? Who’s she??: Yeah you're right yeah yeah
Who?: Uh
Honry for Grinch: Hey bro what’s up?
Brain Cells? Who’s she??: OH THANK GOD I’M STILL YOUR BRO
Horny for Grinch: BRO OF COURSE I AM WHY WOULDN’T I BE??
Riku’s Boyfriend: Is this a Terra from an alternate reality? Why is he acting so weird?
Horny for Grinch: you and me have a tight bond that can never break remember? Why would you even think I wasn't your bro anymore? D:
Mom: Good job acting natural
Horny for Grinch: What?
Mom: Nothing dear!
Brain Cells?Who’s she??: As my bro, you’d tell me everything right? No secrets between us?
Horny for Grinch: Bro of course I would
Edgy Sonic OC: ……
Brain Cells? Who’s she??: Okay, just remember you can always come to me if you need to talk about anything
Horny for Grinch: Bro why are you acting so cryptic?
Mom: Ugh Terra I love you, but you are really bad at keeping secrets
Mom: We should just tell them
Horny for Grinch: What are you guys talking about!?
Edgy Sonic OC:
Horny for Grinch: …...wait
Edgy Sonic OC left the Sora's Groupchat
Riku’s Boyfriend: KASHAKFJS WHAT IS GOING ON???
Chapter 20: Big News
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC - Vanitas
Silence Bottom - Saix
Snaily Boy's Humansona - Olette
Chapter Text
Who?: Guess whose Minecraft youtube channel reached 25 subscribers!
Riku’s Boyfriend: It’s been two days since Vanitas left the chat and he still isn’t back
FlamingHomosexual: Is it yours Xion?
Who?: Yup and one of my videos reached 100 views :)
Riku’s Boyfriend: Aqua, Terra, and Ven also haven’t spoken in the gc in two days
Flaminghomosexual: That's pretty neat Xion!
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Congrats, your hard work is finally paying off
Hayner: My parkour channel didn't even reach 1 subscriber ;(
Riku's Boyfriend: Can you guys please focus for just one second? Our friends might be in danger. Please can you show a little concern?
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: You know if you had just stuck with mine and Pence’s creepypasta channel you would have 500 subscribers right now dipshit
Riku’s Boyfriend: No way! You guys have a creepypasta channel!?
Riku’s Boyfriend: And it has 500 subscribers!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Yeah, you didn’t know?
Riku's Boyfriend: No, not at all, please tell me more
Snaily Boy's Humansona: So, like, Twilight Town is haunted af. So me and Pence track down ghosts and shit and upload it to youtube
Riku’s Boyfriend: Like paranormal hunters?
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Nah, we never actually find supernatural stuff. Our videos are mostly me telling the spirits to fuck off while Pence pees himself.
Who?: That sounds amazing!
Pence: I don’t pee myself!!!!!
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: I have video evidence proving otherwise dude
Pence: Okay, I freak out a little bit when you LITERALLY SKATEBOARD IN HAUNTED PLACES
Pence: But I don’t pee myself
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Sure
Who?: Wow, what’s the name of your channel?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Hayner why aren’t you in on this?
Hayner: I was too busy with my other projects
Silence Bottom: Oh thank god, someone here actually puts effort into their school work
Hayner: Like between my parkour channel, pulling pranks on Seifer, and my nurse visits because of the previously mentioned parkour channel. I really don’t have time to add on a creepypasta channel
Silence Bottom: Why did I assume he meant school projects? How many times must I learn this lesson?
FlamingHomosexual: At least you got Aqua babe
Silence Bottom: Do you think that helps?
Riku’s Boyfriend: OH YEAH AQUA
Riku’s Boyfriend: Y’all remember when she and Terra were acting weird and then Vanitasn left the chat for no reason?
FlamingHomosexual: No
Riku’s Boyfriend: Well none of them have spoken in the chat since then and it’s been two days!
Silence Bottom: Is Terra’s absence really a loss?
Badass Princess: Yo I was ignoring the chat but then I saw the word Terra.
ArtHoe: Terra?? Is he finally back online?
Sora > Mickey: TERRA!?
FlamingHomosexual: Babe nothing is gonna go your way today, just stop talking.
Silence Bottom: No
Badass Princess: What’s up? What about Terra??
Riku’s Boyfriend: Neither he nor Aqua nor Ven have spoken in the chat in days!!!
ArtHoe: I know this and it breaks my heart :(
Badass Princess: I haven’t even seen them around school either
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yeah yeah! And now that I think about it, I don’t think I’ve seen Ven or Vani since the incident
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Why were you more concerned about them not talking in chat than you were about not seeing them irl
Badass Princess: Well, to be fair, Ven sleeps a lot so we don’t really see him irl and Vani mostly stays in his dorm room.
Who?: He’ll hiss at you if you even come close to his door
Silence Bottom: Can confirm,many students have tried to report him for having an illegal pet.
Badass Princess: What do you mean “many students”? No one in this school is a snitch aside from you
Silence Bottom: Fine, I filed many reports about his illegal cat that he doesn’t have.
Badass Princess: Bitch
Silence Bottom: Excuse me?
Sora > Mickey: I haven’t been hugged by Terra in so long……
Sora > Mickey: I don’t think…I have the strength...to carry on…
Riku’s Boyfriend: Aw baby, I can give you as many hugs as you need :(
Sora > Mickey: …
Sora > Mickey: I miss Terra’s hugs so much, I think I’ll die
Riku’s Boyfriend: W O W
FlamingHomosexual: Alright so nobody has seen/heard from these four in two days right?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yeah seems like it
Riku’s Boyfriend: That’s why I’m worried
Riku’s Boyfriend: I don’t even know what to do about it. It seems like they are purposefully a voiding us, so how on earth are we going to make them talk to us again!?
ArtHoe: @ Brain Cells? Who's she??
Brain Cells? Who’s she??: What's up?
Riku’s Boyfriend: h
Who?: Oh, so it was Namine’s turn with the brain cell today huh?
Mom: sigh
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: I’m sorry Aqua, my Gummiphone gave me a green notification message and I got so distracted by it I forgot I wasn’t supposed to talk in the chat
Mom: No it’s okay. You lasted a lot longer than I expected.
Mom: Besides, I was getting antsy. I was about to break myself.
Riku’s Boyfriend: So you guys really were avoiding us ;-;
Sora > Mickey: How dare you guys make my boyfriend upset and make him worry about you for days! I’m seriously so mad at both of you right now.
Badass Princess: Riku...you realize that I saw you running towards Terra’s dorm, right?
Sora > Mickey:...
Sora > Mickey: I’m just going to yell at him in person.
Riku’s Boyfriend: Nonono I don’t want my friends to be mad at each other.
Mom: Sora, honey, I’m so sorry for worrying you.
Riku’s Boyfriend: It’s fine, I just want to know why you did it :(
Mom: I thought I explained everything in the note?
Riku’s Boyfriend: What note?
Mom: Oh, you didn't get it?
Mom: I knew no one else here would notice if we were gone for a couple of days, except for you. So, I wrote a note for you and slipped it under your door.
Riku’s Boyfriend: oh
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yeah lol whenever I get something slipped under my door I assume it’s another progress report so I throw it away immediately
Silence Bottom: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Badass Princess: Wait, why did you guys leave?
Mom: It’s just...there’s a lot going on right now, involving Ven and Vani. And I thought it would be for the best if we took a break from the gc until everything got sorted out.
ArtHoe: I'm confused
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Ehh that's not really the reason. Its more like Aqua banned me from the gc because she said I’m impulsive and can’t keep secrets. Then, she left herself as to not tempt me.
Riku’s Boyfriend: huh?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Okay FINE I’ll tell you. Ventus and Vanitas are dating.
Mom:
Riku’s Boyfriend:
Who?:
Badass Princess:
Sora > Mickey:
ArtHoe:
FlamingHomosexual:
Pence: Sorry for the late reply!! The name of our channel is Twilight Unsolved
Pence: …
Pence: Did I come at a bad time?
Chapter 21: The Reveal
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Edgy Sonic OC - Vanitas
Silence Bottom - Saix
Snaily Boy's Humansona - Olette
Notes:
ao3's formatting is a hoe
Chapter Text
Badass Princess: About time
ArtHoe: About time
Riku’s Boyfriend: about time
Who?: ABOUT TIME
FlamingHomosexual: about time
dummy flat twink: I don’t care
Silence Bottom: About time
Sora > Mickey: Wait, why are they dating? I thought they hated each other??
Badass Princess:
Badass Princess: dude
Riku’s Boyfriend: Riku I love you but
Riku’s Boyfriend: dude
Sora > Mickey: What?
Sora > Mickey: Ohhhh is this another prank I don’t understand?
Who?: I’m praying to every god I know that you aren’t actually this dumb
Flaminghomosexual: How many gods do you know?
Who?: At least 7
dummy flat twink: Personally?
Who?: 4
dummy flat twink: What?
Who?: what
Sora > Mickey: Ven and Vani hate each other...right?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Please everyone excuse my boyfriend, he’s really dense.
dummy flat twink: And I thought Riku was the moronsexual in the relationship.
Riku's Boyfriend: PLEASE DON'T MAKE FUN OF MY BOYFRIEND I LOVE HIM DEARLY.
Sora > Mickey: ajsnsbsb no don't say that in front of everyone >.<
Badass Princess: Omg if you do this stupid song and dance again I'm going to kill you both.
Riku's Boyfriend: What song and dance? I'm just saying that I am absolutely head over heels in love with my amazing boyfriend
Sora > Mickey: HHHHHHH shut up!!
Riku’s Boyfriend: About what?? I’m just saying I love my boyfriend
Sora > Mickey: Nooooo!!!!
Arthoe: You guys are so cute ^.^
dummy flat twink: I’m think I’m going to vomit
Pence: Oh cool, you two love each other? That’s pretty radical lol super cool of you two. I love your pride!
Sora > Mickey: What?
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Oh my god, PLEASE ignore him. He’s a hetreosexual and is trying way too hard to show that he’s an ally.
Who?: What’s a hetreosexual?
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Pffft I know right?
Who?: What?
Badass Princess: Yeah seriously, what?
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Omg are you guys being serious?
Sora > Mickey: I’ve never heard of hetreosexual either
Arthoe: Hetreo sexual??? :/
Silence Bottom: I think it’s one of those “memes” like the previously stated “moronsexual”.
Hayner: OH MY FUCKING GOD THEY ARE SERIOUS
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: I’M PISSING MYSELF, HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW???
Who?: I don’t know? I thought I was the queen of memes, but it turns out I’m a peasant at best.
Hayner: God I wish I was born on y’alls world, where the straights don’t exist.
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: What a paradise
Arthoe: I’m very, very lost.
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Okay, okay, hetreosexual just means you are attracted to someone of the opposite sex.
Who?: Ooh like bi or pan
Riku’s Boyfriend: Ohhhhh you should have said that first, would have saved us a lot of confusion.
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Omg NO!
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Hetreosexuals are EXCLUSIVELY attracted to the opposite sex
Who?: No. that’s not...that’s not real, it can’t be
Riku’s Boyfriend: That can’t happen, can it?
Arthoe: I’m feeling sick
Badass Princess: Pence is one? Is he okay?
Pence: I’m fine, just crying a little bit on the inside.
Hayner: I’m going to cry
Hayner: And I didn’t even cry when I accidentally skateboarded into the tram and broke a bone in all four of my limbs.
Silence Bottom: I’m sorry, you did what?
Mom added Vanitas to the chat
Riku’s Boyfriend: Literally what is the point of having admins if y’all can do whatever you like.
Mom: @Horny for Grinch
Mom: Alright, everyone knows. So, do you two care to explain?
Horny for Grinch: Idk what you are talking about
Vanitas: die
Flaminghomosexual: Don’t be embarrassed, we all already knew
Vanitas: I don’t know what you are talking about
Horny for Grinch: HOW DID YOU KNOW?
Vanitas: God you’re stupid
Horny for Grinch: Well you are stupider
Mom: Oh no, don't fight! Why don’t you two kiss and make up in the bathroom?
Horny for Grinch: Aqua!?
Vanitas: That was a surprisingly low blow from you
Mom: It’s not surprising, I’ve always been harsh.
FlamingHomosexual: Aqua you cried last week because you forgot to say thank you to the cashier
Mom: Well
Mom: I can step up when I need to
Arthoe: Vanitas and Ventus made out in the bathroom :3c ?
Horny for Grinch: NO THAT NEVER HAPPENED.
Mom: That’s how Terra accidentally discovered their relationship.
Badass Princess: Oh wow, what a shock
Riku’s Boyfriend: I know, noooo body thought they had a ton of romantic chemistry
dummy flat twink: Yeah, nobody saw this coming
Vanitas: Stfu I get it
Sora > Mickey: Wait! They are really dating!?!?!?
Riku’s Boyfriend: omg
Horny for Grinch: We are noT!!!!!!!!
Who?: Ugh, why do all my friends get to be in relationships and I’m still single???
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: I know right! I just want a girlfriend already :/
Who?: God SAME
Badass Princess: Vani, Ven, care to explain?
Vanitas: die die die
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: C’mon bro, getting it out is better than keeping it in
Horny for Grinch: Ugh fine
Horny for Grinch: I’m SO ashamed of this, but do you guys remember winter break?
Badass Princess: Do I remember a couple months ago? Yes I do
Vanitas: If you say anything more I’ll rip your toes off one by one
Horny for Grinch: That would be less painful than the humiliation I feel right now.
Who?: Don’t be embarrassed, most of us knew you guys were going to hook up anyway.
dummy flat twink: And most of us don’t care and are turning their phones off right now as we speak.
Who?: Nope, that’s just Roxas, everyone else is invested.
Arthoe: Very much so
Horny for Grinch: Ugh, just
Horny for Grinch: On Christmas night, him and I had a really deep and personal conversation. We just got swept up in the moment and ended up kissing....
Vanitas: He’s lying, I’ve never met this guy in my entire life, I don’t even know his name
Who?: Ventus
Vanitas: God just seeing his name spelled out makes my blood boil
Who?: I thought you didn’t even know his name
Vanitas: …
Badass Princess: So you’ve been dating for a couple of months now and have been keeping it from everyone.
Badass Princess: Impressive that you haven’t been caught till now.
Horny for Grinch: WE ARE NOT DATING
Horny for Grinch: We are still enemies who hate each other bitterly
Vanitas: You got that right >:(
Mom: Who also occasionally make out
Horny for Grinch: Yeah...sometimes…but that doesn’t mean we are dating!
Vanitas: Yeah fucking assholes. Just because I hate his guts and want him to burn alive, doesn’t mean I can’t kiss him.
Horny for Grinch: Exactly!!!
Badass Princess: I’m going to start screaming
Sora > Mickey: Lol good, for a second there I really thought you two liked each other romantically daskfjsajhfkj
Sora > Mickey: But I knew everyone was just trying to trick me :)
Riku’s Boyfriend: Omg babe
Chapter 22: Pudding
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Silence Bottom - Saix
Snaily Boy's Humansona - Olette
Notes:
Ao3 crashed like five times as I tried to post this so this chapter may be cursed
Chapter Text
Silence Bottom: So, how did you want me to react to this?
Silence Bottom: Were you expecting anger?
Silence Bottom: Were you expecting an over-reaction from me in all caps? So that you could laugh at my expense.
Silence Bottom: Well, you aren’t going to get what you expected, because all I feel is disappointment.
Silence Bottom: I hope you see now that bad behavior won’t be rewarded in the way that you like. Today, all you’ve done is let down an upperclassman and I hope you feel deeply ashamed for doing so.
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yo William Shakespheare please chill
Sora > Mickey: Did you just make a literary reference?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Sure did ;) I’ve been paying attention in class to impress you love~
Sora > Mickey: Awwww you didn’t have to, you always impress me uwu
Sora > Mickey: But the fact that you did is making me blush~
Badass Princess: Sora name one thing Shakespheare wrote
Riku’s Boyfriend: He wrote the 2011 classic hit animated film Gnomeo and Juliet
Sora > Mickey: I’m still proud of you despite what you just said
Badass Princess: That was honestly so close that even I’m proud
Art Hoe: Oh please, as if Shakespeare could write anything nearly as good as Gnomeo and Juliet =/
Silence Bottom: YOU STOCKPILED A YEAR’S WORTH OF LEFTOVER PUDDING FROM THE CAFETERIA AND THEN DUMPED IT ALL ON MR. ACED’S DESK
Vanitas: Ah, yes, there it is, the thing I live off of
Vanitas: Anger from a “superior” >:3c
Riku’s Boyfriend: You do not get to take credit for Nam’s and I work hard
Art Hoe: Sorry Vani, but Sora’s right
Art Hoe: You weren’t with us, lunch after lunch, asking other students if they were going to finish their pudding cups
Riku’s Boyfriend: Do you even understand the hours of fun social time we lost? All for this one project?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Do you know how many times our lives were threatened just for just asking for a pudding cup?
Vanitas: How many?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Just that one time you did
Art Hoe: Sora and I put our blood, sweat, and tears into this prank
Silence Bottom: FOR WHAT? WHAT DID YOU GAIN OUT OF THIS YOU LITTLE MONSTERS??
dummy flat twink: Who else is laughing at Saix’s expense rn?
Who?: me
FlamingHomosexual: I’m not ;(
Riku’s Boyfriend: What can I say? I did for the lols
Silence Bottom: YOU COATED A TEACHERS DESK IN PUDDING FOR THE LOLS????????
Art Hoe: yea
Art Hoe: Anyway Gnomeo and Juliet 2: Sherlock Gnomes did not live up to the hype. It was complete garbage compared to the original Gnomeo and Juliet and, as a long time fan, I was extremely disappointed to see the sequel completely flop.
dummy flat twink: I can’t believe I have to say this to sweet, sweet Namine but please shut the fuck up
Badass Princess: No, let her speak!
Art Hoe: Sometimes people are afraid of the truth and that’s okay
Silence Bottom: This is NOT funny.
Vanitas: It’s hilarious actually
Silence Bottom: You realize you two could be kicked out of school for this right?
Art Hoe: Yup!
Sora > Mickey: Whoa wait, Sora this seems serious
Riku’s Boyfriend: Meh
Silence Bottom: THIS IS SERIOUS
Riku’s Boyfriend: Meh
Horny for Grinch: Actually both movies sucked because they were about fucking gnomes
Horny for Grinch: I see Vani is typing and know he’s going to say something stupid. I meant fucking as an adjective not a verb dummy.
Art Hoe: I love that you two get each other like that
Who?: Wish someone understood me like that :/
Vanitas: The dude from phineas and ferb?
Horny for Grinch: I hate you so much
Horny for Grinch: You literally just spelled his name CORRECTLY so I know you know what I meant
Vanitas: >:3c
Horny for Grinch changed Vanitas’ name to stupid bitch
Riku’s Boyfriend: sigh
Art Hoe: Anyway it isn’t fair to hate a masterpiece simply because there are gnomes in it
Horny for Grinch: It’s an extremely valid reason to hate it
Silence Bottom: So no one is concerned that Sora and Namine may be kicked out of school?
dummy flat twink: I’m concerned
Silence Bottom: Oh my god, thank you.
dummy flat twink: I'm concerned that I still don’t have a cake for the party I’m going to throw when Sora is gone
Riku’s Boyfriend: Wooooooooooooow
Hayner: Oh don’t worry dudes! Getting kicked out of your first school is scary but you get used to it pretty quickly
Silence Bottom: FIRST!?
dummy flat twink: How many schools have you’ve been kicked out of?
Hayner: All the highschools in Twilight Town :)
dummy flat twink: I weirdly have a newfound respect for you
Hayner: thxs bro
Silence Bottom: Do you two really want to end up like Hayner?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Yeah!!
Art Hoe: I would love to ^.^
Hayner: I would love to too
Silence Bottom: I have no words.
Who?: Would you say they silenced you :3c
Silence Bottom: Yes, I would.
Silence Bottom: I’m so disappointed, I’m speechless.
Art Hoe: That sucks :/
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Namine is going to leave school!? D’:
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: B-but she’s my little art buddy
Art Hoe: TERRA
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: I’m going to miss her so much. I’ll cry everyday she’s not here.
Art Hoe: TERRA NO!!
Riku’s Boyfriend: So nobody cares that I’m going to be gone too, huh?
Sora > Mickey: I DO I CARE SO MUCH
Sora > Mickey: IF SORA ISN'T IN MY DIRECT LINE OF VISION AT ALL TIMES I MIGHT DIE
dummy flat twink: Barf and this is why I’m excited for him to be gone
Brain Cells? Who’s she??: I care Sora too! He’s my little buddy too!
Sora > Mickey: I CARE SORA
Who?: I care Sora
Riku’s Boyfriend: Awwww guys <3
Mom: Terra is in distress, I can sense it.
Mom: What happened?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: OH thank god my emotional support lesbian is here
Mom: What’s up?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Namine and Sora are leaving the school
Silence Bottom: FOR POURING PUDDING ALL OVER A TEACHER’S DESK
Mom:...What?
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: Can someone please come comfort me? Terra can’t stop crying.
Mom: Oh gosh, he’s referring to himself in the 3rd person. That means he’s really upset.
Art Hoe: TERRA NO I’M SORRY WE AREN’T ACTUALLY GOING TO BE KICKED OUT OF SCHOOL!!!
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: What?
Riku’s Boyfriend: I'm so sorry Terra!!
Riku’s Boyfriend: Saix just came in here accusing us of pulling a prank without any evidence so Namine and I thought it would be funny to just go along with it.
Silence Bottom: I’m sorry, what?
Mom: Yeah, I was about to say, they just found out it was some other teachers who ruined Aced’s desk.
Silence Bottom: …
Silence Bottom: But, you all acted like it was true, did you all plan it?
stupid bitch: Nah we just all immediately caught on and played along
Riku’s Boyfriend: Except for Riku who I had to DM
Riku’s Boyfriend: And I just picked Namine to be my partner in crime because I knew we are always on the same brain wave length.
Silence Bottom: That’s not how it works.
Art Hoe: Our shared brain cell was on fire today!
Silence Bottom: Why did do it?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Because it's really funny watching you get mad
Horny for Grinch: Okay so everyone has a little bit of Vanitas in them apparently
stupid bitch: What can I say? I'm a popular influencer
Art Hoe: Terra I’m so so sorry for making you cry
Brain Cells? Who’s She??: It’s okay! Now I’m crying tears of joy because you aren’t leaving!
Art Hoe: I love you sm Terra!!!
Riku’s Boyfriend: I’m so sorry, we love you a bunch dude!
Silence Bottom: Does anyone care about the emotional turmoil I had to go through because of this lie?
Art Hoe: silence bottom
Chapter 23: The Marluxia incident of '98
Chapter Text
Larxene sent a message to Big Bi Buffoons
Larxene: So when are we going to let Marluxia back into the gc?
Axel: Never
Aqua: Never
Demyx: Never
Zexion: Never
Kairi: Never
Larxene: Shut up pipsqueak, you weren’t even here for the Marluxia incident.
Kairi: My vote still goes to never
Terra: He should come back :D
Larxene: Looks like you guys are outnumbered
Zexion: Do you not know how to count?
Larxene: My vote counts for 5 people and Kairi’s counts for -2 people
Aqua: Larxene >:(
Aqua: What did I say about considering underclassmen as lesser?
Larxene: Sigh…to not do that
Aqua: Correct :)
Kairi: The fact that you’ve had this discussion before is concerning
Demyx: Larxene has tried punting freshmen before
Larxene: In my defense, they deserved it
Demyx: Little dudes have feelings too you know
Larxene: Why would that matter?
Axel: To be fair, there is no scientific proof that freshmen feel any emotions.
Zexion: Yes there is?
Larxene: Cool so Axel is also in favor of letting Marluxia back in
Axel: That is not what I said at all
Kairi: Idk who this guy is but why do you want him back so badly?
Larxene: Because I need more than just one person in this gc that I like
Axel: Is that one person Aqua?
Terra: I like Aqua!
Larxene: No one asked
Demyx: I like Aqua too
Larxene: You’ve made my list
Demyx: What?
Aqua: We can’t let Marluxia back in because he’s very rude
Larxene: That’s a stupid reason
Zexion: No, his rudeness was on an extreme level and he had to be removed. For mine, and everyone else’s, mental wellbeing.
Kairi: I feel like I should point out that we let Vanitas into our other group chat.
Larxene: Whoa, WHAT? Why’s that gremlin allowed on your other gc but my gremlin isn’t?
Demyx: We let you in here
Larxene: Alright
Terra: Um guys I hear screaming near my dorm
Kairi: Does Demyx live near you?
Terra: Yes
Kairi: Eh, then don’t worry, you’ll get used to it after awhile
Terra: Okay!
Zexion: That’s...concerning. I’ll go check on Demyx.
Kairi: Wait isn’t Demyx the groupchat owner?
Axel: Yeah, why?
Demyx added Marluxia to Big Bi Buffoons
Kairi: …because if Larxene stole Demxy’s phone she could let Marluxia back in
Marluxia: Ah, so you guys finally decided to let your best and sexiest friend back in?
Axel: Nah, Saix isn’t in this chat.
Demyx: Broooo that was smooth.
Marluxia: Ignoring him, who missed me ;)???
Kairi: Not me
Marluxia: Who the fuck are you?
Kairi: Kairi bitch, can you not read?
Aqua: Marluxia and Kairi >:( that was rude.
Kairi: I’m rude now
Aqua: >:0
Larxene: I sure as hell missed you
Marluxia: And I missed you~
Axel: Hey, welcome back
Axel: Kairi is an underclassman I’m pretty close with so I let her into the chat
Marluxia: The blond porcupine?
Axel: No that's Roxas, I asked him to join but he refused because he hates upperclassmen
Larxene: That’s valid
Marluxia: Oh, the minecraft kid?
Axel: Marluxia I’ve introduced you to both Roxas and Xion before
Marluxia: I don’t bother to remember un-important peoples’ name
Axel: Alright asshole
Axel: But no, Xion didn’t join because she hates non-gamers
Terra: That’s valid
Larxene: Thats 3 freshmen friends you have? Geez why can’t you interact with people your own age?
Marluxia: Because he’s got the mind of a child
Larxene: No that would be Terra
Larxene: Axel is just lame
Terra: I don’t have the mind of a child
Terra: I’m just dumb
Larxene: Well, at least you can admit it
Marluxia: Oh Larxene, you gotta learn appreciate stupidity
Larxene: Why would I?
Marluxia: Because stupidity is a really sexy trait on men ;)
Terra: I’m sexy :D
Aqua: Terra no!
Kairi: Terra’s head is filled with his love for his friends and his instinct to protect lesbians
Kairi: There’s just no room for thought
Aqua: Stop picking on Terra you guys!
Aqua: He is smart, just in his own way.
Demyx: Yeah exactly, just like how I’m not dumb. I’m smart in my own way!
Aqua:...
Kairi:...
Axel:...
Marluxia:...
Zexion: You are, Demyx.
Demyx: Everyone here sucks except Zexion
Zexion: That’s not true.
Demyx: Oh yeah?
Demyx: No one even asked if I was okay after Larxene tazed me
Zexion: Are you okay?
Demxy: ye
Zexion: Oh, good.
Demxy: Hehehe so you care about me? <3
Larxene: Because you forced him to
Kairi: Stop crushing his dreams
Marluxia: Yeah Larxene, that’s my job
Larxene: We’re a working pair
Marluxia: True
Axel: I think that’s the real why we kicked you
Axel: Separated, Larxene or Marluxia can be tolerable
Axel: Together? A nightmare
Marluxia: It’s insulting that you think I’m tolerable
Marluxia: I don’t need Larxene to be a menace
Kairi: Remind me again why Larxene likes this guy?
Kairi: I thought she hated men and also most people
Larxene: Oh I do
Larxene: Marly is just unlikable in a way I like
Kairi: That doesn’t make any sense
Marluxia: Same to you darling <3
Larxene: Okay the next person to do the less than three gets their dick chopped off
Aqua: <3
Terra: Aqua noooo! You’re going to have your dick chopped off D:
Axel: Nah, Larxene would never hurt Aqua
Kairi: Why not, she literally just tazed someone
Axel: Because she thinks Aqua is pretty ;)
Aqua: Awwww really?
Larxene: Oh shut up, I never said that
Aqua: You don’t think I’m pretty?
Larxene: No, I do
Larxene: I mean, I guess you are
Larxene: In an aesthetic way
Marluxia: This is fun to watch
Larxene: Whatever I’m still going to cut your dick off
Terra: No!
Zexion: Not to ruin the fun, but without the use of proper medical equipment, the possibility of Aqua dying from “getting her dick chopped off” is very high.
Terra: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Kairi: Rip to Aqua and her dick
Demyx: f
Marluxia: f
Zexion: f?
Terra: f ;-;
Axel: This going to be the second funeral of the school year
Zexion: Only two this year? I believe that is an improvement from last year.
Aqua: She never showed up……
Larxene: Meh, I’m too lazy to get up
Marluxia: Is that so? Or are you incapacitated because you are a stupid, useless lesbian?
Demyx: Wait, why is there another banging at my door?
Demyx removed Marluxia from Big Bi Buffoons
Axel: Andddddd we are back to square one
Chapter 24: Three Trio Chats
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Ventus sent a message in Wayfinder trio chat
Ventus: Hey guys, can I ask you a question?
Aqua: Sure sweetie!
Terra: Of course, bro
Ventus: Well, I have this friend who is in a tricky situation and needs my advice, but I don’t know what to tell him. Maybe you guys can give me some advice?
Aqua: You shouldn’t be sharing your friend’s personal information.
Ventus: No it’s okay
Ventus: My friend said it was okay to ask you guys for advice
Ventus: As long as he remains anonymous
Aqua: Oh, okay, so what's the problem?
Ventus: So, my friend thinks he might like his other friend, but he isn’t sure.
Aqua: Romantic feelings can be hard to understand.
Ventus: And he also isn’t sure if his friend likes him back.
Ventus: Because there’s been some signs suggesting that his friend likes him
Ventus: But maybe he’s reading too much into things
Ventus: Also, why does he care? Does he like this friend?
Ventus: He doesn’t know
Aqua: Oh wow, that is a tricky case!
Aqua: I would tell your friend that it's better just to let things happen naturally.
Aqua: Instead of stressing and trying to force himself to figure out his feelings. He should just continue their friendship as they normally would.
Aqua: And, if it was meant to be, then a relationship will bloom naturally. If not, then there probably wasn't any romantic feelings in the first place.
Ventus: Wow Aqua, that's really good advice.
Ventus: Thank you I'm going to tell my friend that right now
Terra: I got some advice too bro
Ventus: What is it bro?
Terra: You like Vanitas and Vantias likes you
Ventus: WHAT!?
Aqua: …..I feel dumb for not realizing that this was about Ven and Vani
Ventus: IT WASN'T IT WAS ABOUT MY FRIEND
Aqua: Honey…you guys kissed
Ventus: YEAH JUST TO EXPERIMENT BUT THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MY FRIEND
Aqua: There are some things that you're very intuitive at Terra.
Terra: Hehe I'm a smart boy :)
Aqua: You are!
Ventus: He's not!!
Terra: Are you saying I'm stupid bro?
Ventus: No of course! It's just in this case you are wrong.
Aqua: It's okay Ven, just tell your "friend" what I told you.
Ventus: ...Okay I will
Terra: Also tell your friend that no boyfriend can ever replace a big bro
Ventus: Um okay I will
Terra: Tell him that he still has to make time to hang out with his big bro even when he's dating someone
Aqua: Okay Terra that's enough
Terra: I just want to make sure Ven’s friend knows how much his bro loves him and that he shouldn’t forget him because he has a new, cool boyfriend
Ventus: Bro my friend knows to cherish and love his bro
Terra: Really?
Ventus: Bro of course, my friend appreciates his big bro and would never forget or replace him
Terra: Omg bro
Ventus: BRO
Terra: BRO!!
Aqua: Aqua!
Xion sent a message to Sea Salt Trio chat
Xion: Sup fuckers!!!
Roxas: hey
Axel: You've been hanging out with Vantias too much
Xion: Axel!!! The exact man I wanted to talk to!!
Axel: Yo
Xion: How was the date :3c
Axel: It was good
Xion: Oh come one you have to give me the details
Axel: Well if you insist
Roxas left Sea Salt Trio chat
Xion added Roxas to Sea Salt Trio chat
Xion: You have to listen too!
Roxas: I don't wanna know about Axel's cooties
Xion: Too bad, you're going to know about the cooties
Axel: Saix was really cute
Roxas: BLECH BLECH BLECH
Xion: Awwwwww
Axel: So he got all dressed up and arrived at my dorm with a bouquet of flowers.
Xion: That's so sweet!!!!!
Roxas: DISGUSTING
Axel: I felt so under-dressed though
Roxas: What were you wearing?
Axel: Obviously the hottest outfit I own
Roxas: I stg if you say you wore your flame button up to a date.
Axel: My flame button up
Xion: Oh my god you wore your sexiest outfit?
Axel: yeah
Xion: Wow how'd Saix react?
Axel: He was enamored by my hotness
Roxas: Oh here's comes the nausea again
Xion: Where did you guys go?
Axel: Taco Bell
Xion: Ooooh fancy!
Roxas: Are you serious????
Roxas: Saix showed up in a suit and with flowers and you took him to Taco Bell!?!?
Axel: Yea
Roxas: In your flame button up?
Axel: Yea
Xion: You are way out of Saix's league
Axel: Hey I'm not superficial
Axel: Just because I'm way more attractive than him doesn't mean anything to me
Axel: I love Saix for Saix
Xion: Awwww
Roxas: I love you Axel but sometimes you say things that make me want to punch you in the mouth
Xion: Don't be jealous you'll get a boyfriend some day
Roxas: Do you think I'm jealous?
Xion: Extremely so
Roxas: This is why I'll get full custody if we ever decide to stop being snail co-parents
Xion: Oof
Axel: love you too Roxas!
Sora sent a message to Destiny Trio chat
Sora: Kairi for the last time if you keep killing Riku I'm going to kick you from the server
Kairi: I can kill Riku and steal his stuff a little bit
Kairi: As a treat
Sora: You KNOW Riku is bad at minecraft >:( it's not fair to kill him
Kairi: Maybe not but it's funny
Sora: >:(
Riku: I hate how oppressed non-gamers are nowadays
Sora:....
Sora: Okay you can kill him
Kairi: Sweet
Riku: NOOOOOO
Kairi: Okay now I'm bored
Kairi: There's only so many times I can blow up Sora's house before it's not funny anymore
Sora: Thanks I was homeless for this whole play session
Kairi: You're welcome, it's what you get for making me play a video game
Sora: Oh shut up you enjoyed it
Kairi: Fine I did
Sora: I knew you were a gamer girl deep down
Kairi: Excuse you I am a princess
Sora: You can be both!
Kairi: No, princesses don't play fornite
Kairi: That's like the first thing they teach you in royalty school
Sora: Oh I'm so sorry your majesty
Riku: Remember how we first befriended Kairi?
Riku: She was the only first grader not to scream and run away when that one kid puked in the sandbox
Riku: Instead she got some paper towels and helped clean him up and take him to the nurse's office
Riku: We were so impressed
Riku: And now you refuse to get your dainty princess hands contaminated with a game controller
Kairi: I'd rather touch vomit than touch fortnite
Sora: Oof!!!
Kairi: Anyway night guys!
Sora: Goodnight!!
Riku: Later
Sora: Hey, now that we are alone ;)
Sora: Maybe...you could put your minecraft bed...next to mine?
Riku: Oh honey I don't know if I'm ready to take that next step in our relationship
Sora: What! Why?
Riku: Because Kairi stole all my wool
Sora: Oh ;(
Notes:
I'm sorry I don't reply to all the comments, I do read and cherish all of them! I promise I do. I'm just horribly lazy. But, I appreciate everyone's support and love for this series.
Chapter 25: Whoo-oo!
Summary:
Riku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Silence Bottom - Saix
Snaily Boy's Humansona - Olette
Chapter Text
ArtHoe: Life is like a hurricane
Horny for Grinch: here in duckberg
Brain Cells? Who's she??: Racecars, lasers, airplanes
ArtHoe: It's a duck-blur
Vanitas: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP
Brain Cells? Who's she??: Are you okay?
Vantias: I hate that song so fucking much stfu
Horny for Grinch: can you chill?
Vantias: no I can't you Stouffer’s Classic Macaroni & Cheese
Who?: You've gotten the song stuck in your head before, haven't you?
Vantias: shut mouth
Hayner: might solve a mystery
ArtHoe: or rewrite history
Hayner: DUCKTALES
Who?: WHOO-OO
ArtHoe: WHOO-OO
Brain Cells? Who's she??: WHOO-OO
Horny for Grinch: WHOO-OO
Riku's Boyfriend: haha whoo-ooo :)
Riku's Boyfriend: Did I ever tell you guys my dad is Donald Duck?
Vantias: WHAT????
Mom: EXCUSE ME!?!?
Horny for Grinch: WHAT
Who?: WHAT
dummy flat twink: huh?
ArtHoe: WHAT!?
Vantias: what the actual fuck
Flaminghomosexual: ajshdhdbsvvsbs that's hilarious
Badass Princess: He's being serious
Flaminghomosexual: WHAT
Riku's Boyfriend: Oh I guess I haven't
Riku's Boyfriend: About a year before school started he and my cousins went off to shoot Ducktales
ArtHoe: I'm sorry your cousins are Huey, Dewey, and Louie?
Riku's Boyfriend: Yeah!
Horny for Grinch: HUH???
Vantias: That's a big fucking bomb to drop on us all the sudden
Who?: No offense but how did a duck give birth to you ???
Flaminghomosexual: Xion you were created in a lab
dummy flat twink: Shut up you're dating Saix, you have no room to judge others
Flaminghomosexual: Geez I'm just saying she shouldn't be questioning others births
Vantias: adoption is a thing moron
Who?: Vantias you know very well that I do not think
Riku's Boyfriend: Yeah I was adopted
Riku's Boyfriend: Oh oh oh and my other dad is in the newest season!
Who?: GOOFY IS YOUR FATHER?
Riku's Boyfriend: yeah he is
ArtHoe: Can you get me their autographs?
Horny for Grinch: I'm about to lose it wtf
Who?: Is this why you're a furry
ArtHoe: furries are born, not made
Riku's Boyfriend: Yeah exactly
Vantias: Hey follow-up question, how much Disney money does your dad give you?
Riku's Boyfriend: :3c
Horny for Grinch: Vantias did you send a DM to everyone asking if they wanted to help you rob Sora in hopes at least one of us would reply?
Vantias: Maybe
Riku's Boyfriend: He even DM me….
Mom: Come on Vantias, you know that isn't right.
Horny for Grinch: Did you really think anyone would help you?
Vantias: Hayner, and Namine said they would
Badass Princess: Namine!?!?
Sora > Mickey: Stop it you're going to make my boyfriend sad
Vantias: Your boyfriend just sent me his daily schedule along with where he hides his spare key
Sora > Mickey: SORA NOOO
ArtHoe: Every day they're
Who?: DUCKTALES
Badass Princess: out there making
Brain Cells? Who's She??: WHOO-OO
Horny for Grinch: out there making
ArtHoe: WHOO-OO
Hayner: DUCKTALES
Riku's Boyfriend: WHOO-OOO
Vantias: Good job guys
Horny for Grinch: This song feels different now that I know it's about Sora's family
ArtHoe: Was it hard growing up with a father who spoke like that?
Riku's Boyfriend: Yes, my life is a tragedy
Who?: WAIT WAIT WAIT
Who?: Is
Who?: Is Max your brother????
Badass Princess: You realize the Goofy movie is a movie right?
Badass Princess: With actors?
Who?: but the duck triplets are his actual cousins?
Riku's Boyfriend: Yeahhhhhh acting kind of runs in the family
Riku's Boyfriend: But, no, Max isn't related to me
Riku's Boyfriend: We are good friends though!
Brain Cells? Who's She??: Tales of daring
Horny for Grinch: Do bad and good
ArtHoe: DUCKTALES
Vantias: It's lucktales
ArtHoe: What?
Vantias: do bad and "good luck" tales
Vantias: otherwise you're just saying good ducktales which doesn't make sense
Who?: WHOO-OO
ArtHoe: WHOO-OO
Brain Cells? Who's She??: WHOO-OO
Snaily Boy's Humansona: Why doesn't your dad wear pants?
Riku's Boyfriend: D-d-danger
Hayner: Avoiding the question I see
Riku's Boyfriend: It's because he has scrawny duck legs
Riku's Boyfriend: How would he wear pants and still be able to walk??
Who?: Lurks behind you
Horny for Grinch: There's a stranger out to find you
ArtHoe: What to do
Brain Cells? Who's She??: Just grab onto some
Hayner: DUCKTALES
ArtHoe: WHOO-OOO
Who?: DUCKTALES
Who?: FUCK
Horny for Grinch: WHOO-OOO
Hayner: WHOO-OO
ArtHoe: Wait...have you ever met Mickey Mouse?
Riku's Boyfriend: Yup he's a close family friend
Badass Princess: @Sora > Mickey we are talking about Mickey Mouse
Sora > Mickey: MICKEY MOUSE???
Horny for Grinch: I never understood the joke of Riku being obsessed with Mickey
Sora > Mickey: He was just...my favorite growing up
Sora > Mickey: He's...well, he's my hero!
Sora > Mickey: He was and still is a big inspiration in my life
Sora > Mickey: Sora let me meet him and I god did I cry
Vantias: Riku, he's a rat
Sora > Mickey: NO YOU'RE THE RAT
Horny for Grinch: Every day they're out there making
ArtHoe: DUCKTALES
Who?: WHOOO-OO
Riku's Boyfriend: WHOOO-OO
Badass Princess: WHOOO-OOO
Hayner: Tales of daring
ArtHoe: do bad and good
Vantias: LUCKtales
Brain cells? Who's she??: WHOO-OO
Horny for Grinch: WHOO-OO
Hayner: WHOO-OO
Horny for Grinch: Wait!! Sora could you, maybe, perhaps hook us up with Disneyland tickets?
Riku's Boyfriend: Oh yeah of course! Me, my family, and any guests we bring are always allowed in free
Horny for Grinch: Oh my god why have you never told us this before??
Horny for Grinch: Do you know how long I've wanted to go to Disneyland?
Horny for Grinch: My whole life, Sora, my whole entire life
Horny for Grinch: And here you were, best buds with Micheal Mouse himself and you didn't say a word
ArtHoe: Maybe he didn't want to tell anyone because he didn't want people to take advantage of his celebrity status
Horny for Grinch: Kairi told us within 0.01 seconds of meeting her that she was a princess of light
Badass Princess: I like to brag
Riku's Boyfriend: Nah it was nothing like that I just forgot to mention it
Riku's Boyfriend: To me it's not that big of a deal
Horny for Grinch: not a big deal YOUR FATHER IS DONALD DUCK
Brain cells? Who's she??: Not ponytails
Horny for Grinch: or cottontails
Who?: Or cottontails
Who?: shit
ArtHoe: No... DUCKTALES!
Riku's Boyfriend: Or cottontails
Hayner: No DUCKTALES
Riku's Boyfriend: Oops
Who?: WHOO-OO
Brain Cells? Who's She??: WHOO-OO
ArtHoe: WHOO-OO
Badass Princess: WHOO-OO
Silence Bottom: Sora's dad is a duck?
Horny for Grinch: WHOO-OO
Chapter 26: Time
Summary:
ku's Boyfriend - Sora
Sora > Mickey- Riku
ArtHoe - Namine
Badass Princess - Kairi
FlamingHomosexual - Axel
dummy flat twink - Roxas
Who? - Xion
Mom - Aqua
Brain Cells? Who's she?? - Terra
Horny for Grinch - Ventus
Silence Bottom - Saix
Snaily Boy's Humansona - Olette
Notes:
Cool fact about this chapter: it was done months ago and I just forgot to post it.
Chapter Text
Horny for Grinch: Wouldn’t it be funny if instead of doing finals we took a group trip to Disney land?
Horny for Grinch: haahah just kidding finals are important
Horny for Grinch: ….Unless
Vanitas: It is 3 in the morning
Riku’s Boyfriend: I can get us tickets
Who?: I can sneak us in
Horny for Grinch: Oh crap I didn’t think anyone would reply until morning
Horny for Grinch: Why are you guys awake?
Riku’s Boyfriend: Energy drinks and minecraft
Who?: Energy drinks and minecraft as well
Vanitas: Insomnia
Arthoe: Working on more humansona commissions
Horny for Grinch: Namine too!?
Arthoe: Namine too :(
Who?: I’m all for ditching finals but I don’t think our older friends would be okay with that
Who?: I’m like 75% sure they wanna graduate and gtfo
Horny for Grinch: Oh god don’t remind me that Terra and Aqua are graduating
Horny for Grinch: I’ve done enough crying this week
Riku’s Boyfriend: Awwwww Ven ;~;
Arthoe: I have also been crying non-stop at thought of Terra graduating
Who?: …and you are sad about Aqua, Axel, and Saix too right?
Arthoe: Oh yeah those guys
Horny for Grinch: AQUA D’:
Horny for Grinch: TERRA D’:
Vanitas: Omg shut up its not like they are dying
Horny for Grinch: I KNOW ITS EVEN WORSE
Vanitas: Worse than death???
Who?: We could just revive them if they died
Horny for Grinch: EXACTLY
Riku's Boyfriend: Not to derail the conversation but I just love thinking about my keyblade and how it has the power to teleport to any world
Horny for Grinch: I get what you are saying but it won't be the same
Horny for Grinch: What will I do when my bro is a world away rather than a floor away
Vanitas: I think you are making a huge assumption that Terra going to graduate
Horny for Grinch: Die in a fire
Vanitas: whatever bitch
Art hoe: Why are they fighting :-: aren't they in love
Horny for Grinch: WE ARE
Horny for Grinch: *NOT
Horny for Grinch: WE ARE NOT
Who?: owo
Vanitas: The idiot can't type don't look into too much
Who?: You are getting real defensive about my owo
Riku’s Boyfriend: Terra may have failed the Mark of Mastery once
Riku’s Boyfriend: But you know what? so have I
Riku’s Boyfriend: All it means is our chances of passing next time have gone up
Who?: Thats because you tried to take it the second day of your freshman year
Riku’s Boyfriend: When at first you don’t succeed try try again
Art Hoe: Aw man, that reminds me that I still have to past the mark of mastery exam
Vanitas: Yeah and?
Art Hoe: I don’t do well under pressure and I have a crippling fear of failure
Who?: Same
Who?: Thats why I decided to wait until I’m a senior to take my first attempt
Horny for Grinch: Hey yoooo! Procrastinators unite!
Vanitas: Thats not something to be proud of idiot
Horny for Grinch: Okay and have you tried the test yet?
Vanitas: No but I never said I was proud of it
Snaily Boy's Humansona : Morning
Vantias: It is 3:23 am
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Don't remember asking
Who?: Hey what’s up?
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Nothing much
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Just playing Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 2
Who?: I never played but I’ve heard good things about it
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: What?? Dude you have to play it
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: I'll let you borrow it
Who?: Sweet
Who?: Could you also perhaps
Who?: Teach me how to skateboard :3c
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: I don’t know…
Who?: Why not :(
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Both Roxas and Axel told me a while back that you’d probably ask
Snaily boy’s Humansona: And they both told me not to do it
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: They both stressed how bad it could turn out
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: With you getting hurt, me getting hurt, Roxas even implied something would catch on fire...
Who?: Please
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Yeah sure
Horny for Grinch: yeah yeah great
Horny for Grinch: now back to me and my struggles
Horny for Grinch: Who will I hang out when Aqua and Terra leave?
Who?: Us!?
Horny for Grinch: :(
Who?: Rude
Art Hoe: You could hang out more with Vanitas ^.^
Horny for Grinch: Blegh why would I?
Riku's Boyfriend: pro tip- making friends with people in your class makes it easier to cheat.
Horny for Grinch: hmm that is a good point
Vanitas: I would never let you cheat off me
Horny for Grinch: What!? Why not!?
Vanitas: Because the homework is super easy just do it yourself moron
Riku's Boyfriend: Oh yeah doesn't Vanitas have perfect grades or something?
Horny for Grinch: That's not fairrrr
Riku's Boyfriend: Can you please share the good student juice with us
Riku's Boyfriend: PLEASE
Vanitas: no
Horny for Grinch: Again this isn't fair
Horny for Grinch: You have the same bad habits as us
Horny for Grinch: How are you getting good grades?
Vanitas: By being epic *skateboards away*
Snaily Boys Humansonas: See guys, skaters can be good students too
Snaily Boys Humansonas: I mean I'm not but you know
Who?: Vanitas puts a good name for skaters and gamers alike
Riku's Boyfriend: If your grades are perfect why can't you help us cheat ;-;
Vanitas: Cause I get nothing in return?
Riku's Boyfriend: You'd get the satisfaction of helping your friends out
Vanitas: Gross
Horny for Grinch: I'll pay you
Vanitas: I'm listening
Horny for Grinch: fuck yeah I'm going to graduate
Horny for Grinch: wait…. graduate…
Horny for Grinch: AQUA TERRA NOOOOO
Horny for Grinch: ILL NEVER BE HAPPY AGAIN
Snaily Boy's Humansona: so when do you wanna pick up the game
Snaily Boy's Humansona: You'll probably have to come to me since you know
Snaily Boy's Humansona: You have a magical weapon that teleport you anywhere
Snaily Boy's Humansona: And I don't even have a car yet
Horny for Grinch: Please turn your attention back to MY suffering
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Oh yeah rip sorry your parents are dead or whatever
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Xion when do you wanna come over?
Horny for Grinch: Being without them will tear my heart into pieces
Who?: Ill stop by after I get out of class
Horny for Grinch: MY suffering guys MY SUFFERING payy attention tooo meeeee
Snaily Boy’s Humansona: Cool sounds good!
Horny for Grinch: Whatever I'll just wait until Terra wakes up so I can be dramatic with him
Horny for Grinch: wait Terra...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Vanitas: Oh boy

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MsBooknerd1 on Chapter 6 Fri 30 Nov 2018 12:20PM UTC
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Last Edited Sun 17 Feb 2019 06:11AM UTC
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